I had my son 31 years ago, he was an 8llb 11oz baby and he was dragged out of me by forceps, i was also told to stop screaming, it was the most horrifying experience of my lifr, so much so i never had anymore children.

@user-og2wq8os2w

11 күн бұрын

That is their ultimate goal. They make it so horrific that we don't go back !

@Jennyxx-ie5jw

9 күн бұрын

@@user-og2wq8os2w Ur right!! This is off topic but i have had similar experiences in Piercing shops,hairdressers where if they're jeakous of u .have something against u or are simply too lazy to do their job they'll give u bad service so u can quickly get out and not return

@mn7024

5 күн бұрын

And majority of the staff seem to be childless/unmarried even though they'd prefer to be mum/married, is this part of the reason?

I have PTSD and trauma after giving birth to my son. I had a 37 hour labour, and was in the hospital from 8pm, and he wasn't delivered by c-section until 5.30pm the NEXT day (i wasn't progressing properly). My epidural was done wrong, i was chastised for "not pushing" when i was, and then they were about to cut me open on the table as i was screaming at them that i could feel everything, and they weren't coming near me with a scalpel. The anaesthetist was poking me on my foot with a pen and arguing i couldn't possibly feel it! I was hysterical by that point (and my sons heart rate was seriously dropping) so i was pinned down by staff and knocked out, to have an emergency general. My son wasnt breathing for 4 minutes during the melee, unbeknown to me! I was in hospital for 8 days. Asked for a bedpan and it was thrown on the chair next to the bed, where i couldn't reach it (i couldnt get out of bed), i was also told "you're not breastfeeding, so we're not feeding your baby", although i was still bedbound and couldn't pick him up! My hubby was in the ward from 8-9am to 9pm every day to look after our son, as the nurses weren't helping me. I was also chastised for not getting up to walk around like the other mums who had c-sections, even though I'd had a general and my legs were giving way, and my BP after giving birth was only 64/35. No compassion, no caring. Nurses full of sarcasm. Forcing women to breastfeed in the ward who didnt want to, and bullying the younger mothers in there. I think i slept 2 hours in 8 days, as every baby was constantly crying. There were 8 of us in one ward. Ended up with severe post natal depression/psychosis for months, and barely remember the 1st year of my sons life. Never had any more children (which I'd have loved to!) but i was too traumatised and terrified to try again.

I’m a nurse in the UK, both in the NHS and private sector, I’m not surprised at all. I’m myself traumatised by working with some evil colleagues and management. I have been trying to quit because of this. Unfortunately you cannot change a corrupted system from the inside (I tried). If I got ill I’d go and get healthcare in my other country.

@annettecampbell6514

14 күн бұрын

😱😱😱

@mn7024

5 күн бұрын

Thanks for your honesty

What?!?! Much higher than 1 in 25! Try 1 in 2! The NHS left me completely traumatised with their lack of care, procedure and complete ineptitude. I had two babies with the NHS and a few other procedures.. all so bad, I now go private even though I have no insurance. Two emergency sections because of their gross mismanagement of my labours.

I was a qualified nurse and STILL had bad treatment for two of my three deliveries. For my first, she was facing the wrong way and the tail end of my spine snapped as she was born. I was in great pain and could not sit down, but wasn't believed. After three days a doctor took me to a room where he roughly examined my spine and I shouted out with pain. He commented sarcastically that I was just 'jumpy', and nothing was done. I suffered for about a year afterwards. For the second birth I was left alone trying to deliver a 10lb baby and was crying in pain when he got stuck. I had so many complications afterwards and believe that they should have monitored me and done an emergency caesar. There are many wonderful NHS staff who an amazing job, but there are also too many who don't. When I first started my nurse training many years ago, I was shocked at some of the nurses who had a callous attitude to the patients, I hadn't thought it would be like that.

@loumc8610

15 күн бұрын

Why would you expect your treatment to be different from someone who is not a nurse?

@everydaywinning

15 күн бұрын

​@loumc8610 my sister is a nurse, they literally roll out the red carpet when she goes to see the gp. When I go, I am ignored, all concerns are brushed aside. I now have private health, it's a shame it does not cover maternity. I am currently pregnant and really worried how I will be treated.

@sensimania

15 күн бұрын

​@@loumc8610 Because one would assume that their peers (no matter what industry they work in) would want to give a better impression if its someone who works in the same field. Especially a field that requires empathy and care.

@loumc8610

15 күн бұрын

@@sensimania that’s fakery not empathy

@loumc8610

15 күн бұрын

@@everydaywinning i hope that you have a safe delivery

I'm going to share another taboo - My Mother trained as a nurse (and was a midwife) and she always maintained that the training had gotten so much worse. Back in the late 50s and 60s Matron ran the ward like a drip sergeant, and standards were maintained. No ward would be filthy, no bed unmade, no patient would be suffering, hungry, thirsty, unwashed or traumatised - Matron would give one look and every nurse would be hopping apparently 🤷🏾‍♀️ (and God help you if you were rude, abrupt or laughed at a patient!) Maybe someone (or these ladies) need to start a review website for different procedures and where to get the best care (like Trip Advisor) - the NHS would soon start paying attention when all expectant mothers request to go to the "good" maternity wards!! We women need to learn to mobilise and fight for each other!

@Bringon-dw8dx

15 күн бұрын

Firstly this isn’t a taboo Secondly the work load was significantly lower when your mother was a nurse, hence why nurses had time to do all the things mentioned. Standards of the pretty stuff may have been higher (such as a well made bed) but injuries and deaths rates in childbirth for mum AND baby were much higher too!

@Ethericrose

13 күн бұрын

I don't believe having a made bed and a clean sterile ward was or is classed as "pretty stuff!" It is exactly standards that made it work and would make it work today, Even in the 70s 80s standards were better. For instance, nurses had uniforms for a reason, not only did it separate doctors from nurses and other staff, their belts told you how trained they were, they were also worn for hygiene. Today you can't tell the difference between an HCA or trained staff because everyone wears scrubs weather its in the hospital or while walking around town. We were taught to cover our uniforms up when leaving the hospital due to transference of germs. Infact you were fined if you were caught not covering up. Care workers look filthy these days in trainers or crocs and grubby cardigans. There's reduced care because of a lack of standards and direction.

@TheStar798

12 күн бұрын

@@Ethericrose Very well said! Exactly 👏 👏

I was so traumatised by my experience in the hospital I would never have another child..... If I had not been on the ball they would have injected me twice in 1 day with blood thinners because they mi's wrote in the notes what medication had already been given to me, they over anesthatised me and suppressed my breathing and had to intubate me, they nearly killed me and that's not all of the horrific mistakes they made..... A week after I discharged myself they killed a new mom by giving her induction medication AFTER she just gave birth..... Absolutely desgusting Sheffield hallam shire hospital.

@sensimania

15 күн бұрын

😳 an induction injection AFTER she had already given birth??? How does that even happen??? I hope her family dealth with them accordingly

This is one of the reason why many women don't want to give birth - not having compasion and essential help you need during the most traumatic experience in your life. Politicians better stop treating women like we're at their disposal and provide the adequate care

@monikacorgi

15 күн бұрын

Women who don't want this are just wise

I recently had a baby at an NHS hospital which I'll never do again. They had me laying in a blood soaked bed for over 3 hours until someone decided to stitch me up after I tore. They kicked me out of bed at 1am and put me on a ward for their own convenience. I was consistently referred to by the wrong name, as was my baby. They confused my medical history with someone else's. They refused to get me a drink of water the morning after I'd given birth. The hospitals are filthy, unsafe and the majority of staff are hostile towards patients. They are an absolute disgrace and I'll demand a home birth next time.

@stephenball-qo7ug

15 күн бұрын

Did they keep calling you Heinz?

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

​@@stephenball-qo7ughahaha!

@random_an0n

15 күн бұрын

where they white drs or poc? what part of the uk was it? labour ward?

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

@@random_an0n it was north Durham last year, staunch Labour. Around 60-70% of the maternity staff I dealt with were native and the rest were poc imports while the patient demographic is 97% English here, one of the highest England. One thing that stood out to me was that all of the young nurses and midwives were foreign, while all of the English ones were middle aged and heading to retirement.

@KushQueen9

15 күн бұрын

That's crazy and very traumatising. I hope you and your baby are doing well now.

I delivered my baby at Queen's in 2021, I had a traumatic experience as well and wanted to get out of the hospital as soon as possible as the after delivery ward at Queens was terrible. The nurse was not even happy to grab a cup of water to me who had C section and my entire lower body was numb and couldn't walk straight after. I was not even offered a hand to stand up, she politely refused saying "The water station just round the corner help yourself darling" . Furthermore, during a distressing moment when my newborn was crying inconsolably, her lack of empathy was evident when she remarked, "You should know why your baby is crying, how will I know." This lack of understanding and support added to the distress of an already difficult situation. As a taxpayer who contributes significantly to funding healthcare services, I am disheartened by the lack of care and compassion I received during my time at the hospital. I believe it's crucial for healthcare providers to uphold high standards of care and empathy, especially in sensitive situations like childbirth

Sadly empathy has left this once great country.

@ianlewis1969

15 күн бұрын

Less empathy 20 years ago, but also less support and needy people

@justsomestranger4894

15 күн бұрын

​@@ianlewis1969 I would think asking for compassion during childbirth isn't asking for much

@ianlewis1969

15 күн бұрын

@@justsomestranger4894 your need for me to repeat myself shows the generational problems. I’m giving answers that your not reading or don’t like. The NHS has always been compassionate, maybe the new generation not so much!

@loumc8610

15 күн бұрын

@@ianlewis1969 a woman giving birth is now a needy person? You sound like you work for NHS

@ianlewis1969

15 күн бұрын

@@loumc8610 no, just a dose of reality.

I had my baby 23 years ago, it really does depend which hospital you go too. I found the nurses and doctor, as it was a very difficult birth, absolutely marvellous could not fault them. But the ward was terrible, I couldn't wait to get out. Taking blood samples from me everyday for five days, sometimes thrice a day. With absolutely no explanation of why by nurses or the doctor, who took blood, after my veins collapsed in both arms. My arms were black not just one bruise but a huge patch . I asked umpteen times why finally the doctor said it was because I had had a ten pound baby and they wanted to know why! I'm still awaiting the results of those blood tests lol. Or the actual reason for so many being taken. I refused the last taking of blood and was sat in a corner surrounded by six nurses telling me not to be so silly. I still refused. I finally got out the next day, twenty minutes before my husband arrived to pick me up, a Indian doctor came and said that I needed a blood transfusion as I had lost a lot of blood. I asked how long it would take, three days he said, no definitely not. So signed a form for my release. I was fine, a week later , a nurse came took blood again, exclaiming what on earth has happened to your arms?? Told her , she took blood, looked at it, said it's far to bright a red for there being anything wrong with your blood. Two weeks later she came I asked her about my blood, nothing wrong with you, perfect she said. The nurses on the ward there was no communication what they were going to do with you, just hello Mrs .... Rubbed my arm needle in taking blood. I would say the first thing I would do is explain why I needed bloods and what I am about to do to you and it will only take a minute. Sadly lacking in any communication skills at all. Once is fine but when it was three times per day I want an explanation!!!

It's not just childbirth - NHS is not fit for purpose. I'm a tetraplegic and I would have to be just about dead before I enter a hospital again. Been in many hospitals. And yes, some are better than others but the standard is still too low by far

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

Completely agree, I know several people who now say they will only use the NHS in life threatening situations. Hope you get the care you deserve btw

@irenedavo3768

15 күн бұрын

@@bakedbeans9546I had fantastic care in my local Hospital!

I also had an horrendous time at an NHS hospital. Thank God me and my son are still alive, many staff on those wards are just down right evil.

There is no difference between them working in a warehouse and a hospital...caring is not something they provide at the NHS.

@buzzukfiftythree

13 күн бұрын

To generalise about the level of care in the NHS is wrong. Without in any way diminishing the suffering of those upon which the report was based, these cases are a minority. My partner had excellent and compassionate cancer care last year from just about everyone concerned. But things have to change for maternity care.

It is a postcode lottery, they also don't tell you that you CAN move hospitals. I'm so glad we did, because some hospitals were frankly brilliant and others were trash.

I had the most horrible treatment from Nigerian midwives at the Royal London. They were constantly annoyed and kissing their teeth when I asked for help. At one point, a midwife who was adjusting my baby's feeding position grabbed my baby's foot and tossed It aside while speaking to me like I was a child. Got to the point where I was scared to call for them.

@sensimania

15 күн бұрын

Why are so many people so scared to stand up for themselves? I know it was a delicate and stressful time, but i would've gone mad if I saw anyone manhandling my child and talking to me in a certain way.

@user-bv9is4zc8w

15 күн бұрын

I keep hearing bad Press about Nigerians working in our hospitals and nursing homes !! Stating how evil and cruel, not all i hasten to add ,but why just Nigerians

@el19_

15 күн бұрын

​@@user-bv9is4zc8w My brother said the same thing about the ones working in the care home where he used to.

@KushQueen9

15 күн бұрын

Oh no that is absolutely disgusting!

@Sheba8.

15 күн бұрын

​@@sensimaniastrangely we're somehow put under some kind of spell by these demonic freaks. I'm not joking! It's absolutely weird.

This is so sad, I had an awful experience after my c section which has made me choose not to try for another child. Why do these people go into that line of work if not to care for others.

I really feel for these women I was really lucky to have a great nhs anaesthetist for my c section can’t imagine being treated so badly when your so vulnerable too

They act like the whole pricess is mechanical, as if the baby is hospital property, and the mother is doing a job for them and doing it badly. They jab your poor little newborn baby without even asking your preferences. Thet lie and scare you. They are appalling and any good ones are rare.

@TotesVegan-hm1or

15 күн бұрын

the ones that handle births with babies that could have risk of life lost or a scan shown they are going to be born with disabilities. The team is amazing

@scribbles3721

15 күн бұрын

While the birth rate is lowering …

In 2020, I got sent home when I arrived at the hospital and told to return when I'm screaming in agony. In the time it took to drive home, I was in full-blown labour and my son's father had to call an ambulance to bring me back. I was 10cm on arrival and told it's too late for any pain relief. I endured a 12 hour back labour unmedicated, and suffered two 2nd degree tears. To add insult to injury, I was kept in the hospital for three days afterwards as they mixed up my blood tests with another mum's. I ended up discharging myself as I was starving, missed my home and family (my son was born during 1st covid lockdown so I couldn't have any visitors or eat anything from outside the hospital) and was exhausted as the ward was noisy 24/7. Never again.

Had a perfectly healthy birth of my daughter. They messed up & gave her drugs she didn’t need (only finding this out on the discharge notes) so rather than admit this they kept my daughter and I trapped in the William Harvey hospital for 5 days over the holiday seasons. I couldn’t leave the building and if I did for more than 5 minutes I was called a bad mother. I was poked and prodded every 2 hours like a test subject. I am still having flash backs of being taken back to hospital and not being able to leave. They coerced me into returning to hospital for “one night” and kept me for an additional 5 days. Then on my release day they tried to make out it was because they thought I wasn’t fit to be a parent and asked me multiple questions before I left. It was absolutely horrific

@sensimania

15 күн бұрын

Did you have anyone advocating for you?

@goodgoldisrare

15 күн бұрын

Hey sorry to hear that. After having done some due diligence, William Harvey has a bad reputation for birth and instead I decided to give birth at London. Hope you're okay 💗

@Sheba8.

15 күн бұрын

Evil institution. I feel it when I'm in there. I've witnessed it and also had horrifying experiences myself. I regret not doing anything about it.

@bbj4613

15 күн бұрын

@@sensimania yes. I sent a formal complaint and once I can I am contacting a family solicitor who contacted the hospital on my behalf to get me out as they wouldn’t let me leave. They even said on day 5 “I don’t think you’re going to leave actually”. Then the social services was telling the hospital they have to let me leave, they had no right to keep me in there. Making up she had rashes (upon inspection she didn’t), antagonising me at my most vulnerable, nurses saying I needed to be medicated ! (I broke down in tears because it genuinely felt like I was in a black mirror series) Every day I doubt myself as a mother because of that experience, in public I feel judged even though the reality is I’m doing a good job. It really messed me up.

@sensimania

15 күн бұрын

@@bbj4613 So sorry that happened to you. I hope the staff on duty gets whats coming to them. I also hope you can recover from that horrible experience. Therapy may help see you through 💜

The working nurses are intent on hearing that after the ordeal of childbirth, you won’t be having any more babies, l wonder why they have that agenda, l think it must be a directive from management.

I’ve had 5 children and have good experiences 4 born in St Mary’s London and one in St Thomas London (brilliant care at both hospitals).

My labour was progressing quickly, but they told me there were no delivery rooms available. I was stuck in triage and luckily got a delivery room just in time, panicking tremendously up until then. I had third-degree tearing but had to wait for over 10 hours for stitches because other women needed more urgent treatment in the operating theatre. I've unexpectedly fallen pregnant again even though I was taking precautions. And I'm terrified.

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

Get a doula and investigate home birthing

@aa-fw2pw

8 күн бұрын

@heatherw.3528 Thanks for the suggestion! I do have gestational diabetes though, and I'm 36 years old, so I feel like this one is a high-risk pregnancy. Home birthing sounds really calming, though!

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

@@aa-fw2pw a doula can advocate for you in hospital as can a private midwife if that’s in your budget. Good luck 🤞

Would not have another child because of the way I was treated throughout my labour, delivery and after when my son arrived at 33 weeks. The lack of compassion was horrific and only added to an already very traumatic experience. It’s taken 20 months of counselling to start to be able to function normally and the idea of going to hospital still gives me panic attacks. Shocked and saddened this is so high, but not surprised. It feels like a gamble with the odds of having a good birth experience outweighed by the bad.

Both my births were traumatic and i still think about it with horror 28 years later. Both sons were breach and 10lb , i had to bring them " Naturally " there was nothing natural about it .at one point the hostile midwife said "if you want this baby, you better pull your finger out " i wasn't even given a sip of water during a 24 hour labour, she didn't ring my husband till i was at the pushing stage ,all i could think of was he'd crashed on the way to the hospital. The Leicester Royal Infirmary is a place of terror not care

On the other hand allow me say special thanks to Stoke mandeville Hospital in Buckinghamshire 2yrs ago I had an emergency c section and the staffs were so caring from the theatre up to when I was discharged and 5 days ago I had another baby v birth and again the care was absolutely incredible,

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

You are very lucky. I live within the clutches of that hospital and I have made formal complaints twice for their criminal lack of care, duty and professionalism. Those complaints were for the potentially life threatening mismanagements not for the other times when they were rude, gave out wrong meds, left a very sick child for hours, misdiagnosed, forgot us etc… terrible hospital imo

This is nothing new. I used to campaign for changes in maternity care. I went to parliament to discuss this in 2005 after 2 horrendous births myself in the 1990's. Nothing has changed sadly.

Two specific examples: The basics aren't done properly anymore taking blood inserting cannulas. The amount of cannulas I've seen inserted incorrectly is shocking. Are people not trained to do this anymore? Second specific example. People always talk about doctors and nurses but patients are looked after by healthcare assistance, washing, cleaning, positioning, dressing, anything else that is not medical... Is not medical... These people are paid poorly and overworked. If hospitals had twice as many hcas people would have a very different view of the NHS

Traumatised does not qualify what i went through!

This is terrible to hear but not surprised with how much the NHS is squeezed now and has been for so long. My wife had a terrible birth and pregnancy for the term. Hopeless midwife - very unprofessional, needed surgery - cut through a major artery and almost died there on the delivery table, forceps delivery because they left her too long in labour and could not c sec, struggled to feed as so many tubes, three or four attempts at injection to spine, one nurse badly handled our daughter and was so rough - we had no idea how she was not hurt. The only good part was they kept in for a week compared to the norm 2-3 days then kicked out. Amazingly she held it together and is such an amazing mum to our daughter (women are just amazing people and do not get enough credit!) Sadly it traumatised her so much she is scared to have a second child which is a real shame as we always wanted two children.

Midwifery is a very specialised training .So glad i did my training at a highly respected Obstetric training hospital .Sadly, now midwfes are trained now through universities, and the care and compassion isn't there.

As a nursery nurse who has worked within maternity hospitals, I can absolutely say ALL of these problems are due to overworked and hurried staff. They just do not have the time to offer the level of care that is required. Compassion and empathy all take time and it is time the staff just do not have. They are stretched too thin to give each woman the time & attention that she deserves.

@user-cu9cb5mx2h

15 күн бұрын

No, you are wrong, not ALL of these problems are due to under-staffing... I am one of these women and what I experienced was much darker than that.

@budd2nd

15 күн бұрын

@@user-cu9cb5mx2h One of the additional problems of being understaffed, is that you do not sack the less professional members within the team. You are inclined to give them another chance rather than just get rid of them.

@adamkennedy7297

15 күн бұрын

Stop lying 😂

@shez5964

10 күн бұрын

It's all connected to finances., Are epidurals and/or ceasers discouraged because of costs the hospital is reluctant to spend. I was a maternity nurse about 40 years ago. Mum's had the option of putting their baby in the nursery where qualified competent nursery nurses cared for baby and gave mum a break. It was decided to get rid of the nursery nurses using the reason that mothers and babies should stay together 24/7 regardless of how tired mum was because of "bonding". It was the buzz word of the era. IMo it was bulldust. Nothing but a means to save the hospital money.

I expect your kind to be tougher than this?😱😱😱😱 that is absolutely abysmal. In 2024, i cannot believe we are still discussing racial problems in child delivery. So sad, honestly.

@JennyAmponsah

13 күн бұрын

This is precisely the reason why I have chosen not to have children.

I had my baby in Dec ‘23 and had a terrible experience. They mixed up by baby’s blood test results with another patients resulting in a much longer hospital stay than necessary, the heating system stopped working in the middle of the and we were so cold. Nothing was done for hours to repair the issue and had a sleepless night. Lack of compassion from staff; mothers were expected to collect their own hospital meals if partners were not around and you get shouted at for not collecting your meal within minutes. Just one of many things I experienced & still have PTSD.

My 2nd son was born in Jan 2023. I basically saw no staff whilst I was there, I wasn’t checked throughout my induction. I had a high risk pregnancy, but no one seemed to care. I was forced to share facilities with a lady who hadn’t been checked for any diseases. When I then went in for emergency forceps, the anaesthetist said “What is the red wrist band for, what are you allergic to?” I said “latex” and he said “Well that would’ve been nice to know before I’d used a latex cannula.” I was then parted from my baby for 45 mins as they couldn’t get a bed to move me off of the operating table. I have since ended up with a CSF leak which has left me with crippling headaches, so I’m on an urgent referral to Neurology due to this. Trauma doesn’t come close to how I feel 16 months on.

Two babies, two birth traumas. I can never do it again. It truly nearly broke me in every sense.

The solution is obvious: privatise the NHS. We could hold the health service and treatment level to account, we’d all be richer and pay less tax, and more lives would be saved. If it was a private organisation, we’d also have and expect customer service and competition from other companies would drive improved services (empathy, care, etc) and targets (wait times, patient satisfaction, etc). Gone would be the days of long waiting times, and fully booked GPs..what a ghastly idea! The NHS killed my grandmother, missed cancer in my mother, refused surgery for my father (which after a 5 minute private consultation ended in surgery which solved his 15 year problem), and nearly killed my friend when they gave birth. Greatest service this country has? Give over.

@ellaa.k.t6998

14 күн бұрын

Totally agree! We pay high taxes for our entire lives for what?? To get killed, ignored and traumatised! Healthcare should be private and we should be paying much less taxes.

@anjalianthony1656

12 күн бұрын

Look how well privatisation worked for the water companies - investors took out billions in dividends, did not upgrade any infrastructure and now they are spewing raw sewage into all the waterways without any penalty. Just read all the articles about Thames Water!! It’s a lesson - Privatisation does not improve essential services.

@MW-ml5eq

12 күн бұрын

@@anjalianthony1656 I went private for something I was waiting 4 years on the NHS for. Solved in 7 weeks. Looks like it works to me. People choose private because it works :)

@ellaa.k.t6998

12 күн бұрын

@anjalianthony1656 does this justify NHS's utter incompetence, toxic culture, and inherent lack of compassion? Please don't start with "mismanagement of money" - if an organisation's entire maternity service is known for evil treatment and bullying of patients, no amount of money can change that culture! They have zero competition and utter complacency, that is the problem here! They need competition and we need private services instead of paying NHS... as simple as that!

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

@@anjalianthony1656 water is privatisation without choice so they can treat customers appallingly and there are no other water options. Disingenuous. Private health care would be a matter of choice in providers. If water were run this way, it would be a different game altogether

I could never use the NHS again. Its been 3 years I've been with vitality and I've been the healthiest I've been in years. I could never Subject my future child to any NHS staff.

@buzzukfiftythree

13 күн бұрын

I’m glad you’re well, but not everyone is able to have the choice.

@Letstalk295

13 күн бұрын

@@buzzukfiftythree I live alone. Grow up in the foster care since I was 7 years old. Aged out at 18 and let on my own, and as a child I had a lot of trauma 65% of that came from dealing with nhs staff. I still struggle with CPDST from the things nurses did to me m. I take medication to keep my mood on a normal level and I work to be able to pay 60£ a month for my healthcare. I get not every is as able to work, but the only reason I don’t buy into that for to long is because of my own life experiences and issues I still deal with everyday. To me at the end of the day if you want to change and be more happier in your life you have to push through the pain and have an understanding that nhs is a money making machine there is more incentives to keep people unhealthy, instead of helping them to the point they don’t need a doctor every other week.

The correlation of problems in Childbirth between “People of Colour” in the U.K. and those in the African Continent are almost identical.

@naomi5495

15 күн бұрын

There’s a correlation between tories and healthcare/ living standards being sent back to the Victorian era.

@garyayres4404

15 күн бұрын

@@naomi5495You speak with a forked tongue.

@orionnebula1136

15 күн бұрын

Whats your point?

@garyayres4404

12 күн бұрын

@@naomi5495 Ah the Laborious Activist speaks.

@user-wg3kj7uy7f

12 күн бұрын

Please expound further what you mean.

I can relate as my experience was traumatising for my 2nd child and I never had anymore. I was sent home to then bleed and once back was to late for any pain Relief so I suffered 2 and half days and my midwife was so mean I demanded her leave , new midwife came in broke my waters straight away and I gave birth. basically the first midwife left me to suffer in agony.

Good old NHS. You know the one you clapped for during Covid. I'm sure I will now get "The NHS needs (even) more money" National disgrace.

@so-la3062

14 күн бұрын

Many of us were not clapping

I had a baby in June 2021 and I honestly do not have a single positive thing to say about the care I received. It was absolutely atrocious, none of the staff had a single clue what they were doing, they didn’t believe me when I said I was in pain and left me alone for 6 hours telling me I wasn’t in labour. Funnily enough I was! There was no care before, I was repeating ambulanced to hospital during my pregnancy because the gp wasn’t listening. There was no care after. I tore and when I had stitches they yelled at me for being in pain, and carried on without giving me pain relief. It was absolutely atrocious.

Thank you for saying WOMAN and MOTHER. As it should be.

Aberdeen hospital maternity staff are legends. My daughter wouldn't be here if not for a fantastic midwife who came in on her day off just to check on us and discovered a problem. I personally believe they are the best and I will always respect them!

@naomi5495

15 күн бұрын

lol they almost killed me and my child.

@jasonbozz5288

11 күн бұрын

@@naomi5495 'Almost' killed yours vs 'Definitely' saved mine. I wont belittle your experience as its just as valid as mine. You can do a 1000 things right and get no recognition but you get 1 thing wrong or make a mistake and no one lets you forget it. as i said in my personal opinion I love them

@poetryinaction2088

11 күн бұрын

Aberdeen is not in England thankfully I feel like most of the issues start in England. Scotland and Wales are doing somethings right

Induction process started Wednesday morning, had my daugther via c section on Friday evening due to having a high temperature and infection. Had my waters broken in a brutal way, I screamed for the midwife to stop and she didn't. 2 pethidine injections (slows down labour), left without a midwife for 12 hours as they were short staffed. No help breastfeeding afterwards. I didn't end up breastfeeding which caused me to become depressed. This was 5 years ago and the whole experience still haunts me. I'll never have another child.

I was in labour for 3 days in hospital before anyone noticed and had my baby prematurely at 31 weeks. I should have had an emergency C-section but they didn’t realise till it was too late and my baby had a brain injury because of of it! The excuse was it was very busy and only had one doctor on the whole maternity ward. This was 8 years ago and still won’t forget it. And 3 years ago another traumatic experience with my second but what other options do we have?

Poor women,its horrendous for women who have a very hard labour,the pain its self can make you feel like your dying,I'm not surprised they can suffer ptsd & then they have to go home feeling like this & look after a new born baby.😮

My wife recently had c section . We had an amazing experience. She didn't even realise and the baby was out. 1 person was calming her down and other was telling what they are doing . It was really nice for us. But also know of close friend of us who had a very bad experience in normal birth . They didnt want to take women to c section till the last moment which put her in a very dangerous position

I’m so glad I had my babies in the US, in birth centers and hospital but I knew how to advocate for myself. Birth should not be traumatizing.

This is why some people don’t want kids. Who wants to deal with childbirth followed by a screaming baby and sleepless nights after. Also your freedom and job being cut off unless you can pay for high daycare prices.

@JennyAmponsah

13 күн бұрын

Yep and I’m one of them. Never wanted children and after hearing this, I don’t regret my choice. This woman is incredibly brave to go through this three times.

I endured despicable treatment from some NHS staff during my pregnancy and birth. It was utterly traumatic and still is. Many of my friends have also had traumatic births at the hands of the NHS mid wives

Well, our government says we need to focus on trans people (who make up less than 2% of the country) and fighting wokeness (equality). So why does this shock people?

I’m in the USA and I had birth trauma as well. We had insurance and birth plan and everything. Pregnancy was great but labor and delivery horrible. It happens. I feel for this mama, I really do. But it happens all over the world. You can put in a complaint to the hospital if you felt you were treated unfairly. Not sure if it will help but it might help keep a record of specific complaints.

@jasonvoorhees5640

15 күн бұрын

oh, shut up karen

I had a beautiful birth in a midwifery led unit with no pain relief not even gas and air and the staff were absolutely amazing. However, 4 days later I was readmitted with sepsis, I could feel myself dying and was denied pain relief. My cannula fell out and they tried to recanulate me 8 times and when that failed they just didn’t put one back in. 6 hours later I felt like I was dying once again mu heart rate 160 and blazing temperature. They bought an ultrasound machine within 2 minutes to recanulate me. All this time I was breastfeeding a new born with my body shutting down. I asked for a pump because my milk was leaking everywhere due to the babies crying I was SOAKED they said no. This was 12 weeks ago I still haven’t left the house I cry every single day. I’ve told my GP he said I’m resilient so I’ll get over it.

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

That is horrific

me too and it was 32 years ago and I am still shocked at my care my lack of care!

I could write an essay about how dreadful my births of my 2 daughters were born on the nhs… I’m just happy that they are now lying sleeping next to me because I honestly feel like me and my 2 daughter could of been dead from births… I hear bad and similar stories from other mums aswell… awful 😢

I absolutely relate with you... the poor and negligent care was unbelievable.

The nurse was saying to me stop powshing we are not ready yet how will u stop 😂

All of my friends,that are brazilians living in the UK, had horrible experiences in childbirth. When I got pregnant, we'e in Brazil and my husband wanted to come back to the UK as we'd have a free health service. I said to him I didn't feel confident enough and Praise God we're blessed with health insurance in Brasil and resources that provided me with the best experience I could have. We're in the UK now and want to have more children, I often think about these horrible stories. But now as I know what to expect for a respectful medical treatment I feel more safe to do it here.

@stringer-ik1pc

15 күн бұрын

Please tell them to follow you home.

@yasmimr3000

4 күн бұрын

@@stringer-ik1pc Home is in the Uk now, darling. You like it or not.

We midwives are traumatised too by the conditions we are forced to work in.

They messed up my epidural and gave me a spinal. Instead, I had to have men coming in every hour to top up my pain relief to which they kept being late, so I was screaming in agony. Then I got sudden new pain while pushing that was absolutley insane i couldnt breathe and i knew something was wrong but no one listened to me I was screaming somethings wrong while pushing and a midwife said "its just childbirth pain you need to listen to us" I screamed back "NO ONES LISTENING TO ME, SOMETHING IS WRONG!" finally they got a doctor to come check me and turns out my baby was stuck. If I'd carried on pushing his life and mine would of been at risk as he was half way down the birthing canal. I was in so much pain I couldnt even see straight or think straight then suddenly there was a guy in my face asking me about my teeth and my nose ring and waving a peice of paper in my face, I had NO idea what it was for I remember shouting "can my husband please sign it I can't even see it rn I'm in so much pain PLEASE give me pain relief" but he said no you need to sign it. They didn't give me pain relief until I signed it so I remember signing just so he wpuld leave me alone and to get the pain relief. Turns out it was concent for forceps and emergancy c section. I didn't even know why I had a c section I thought it was because I was screaming too much. I didn't have a clue what I was signing for but after 19 hours of labour I finally had my boy by emergancy c section. I was so dehydrated in the surgery I felt like I would pass out and I needed water but they kept saying I wasn't allowed anything until after surgery when it was finally over they wheeled me back up to the recovery room and I had my baby in my arms but I couldn't see him as I was laying flat I kept asking for them to put me up abit so I can see my baby but they keot saying they can't yet. it felt like hours and hours until I could FINALLY look at his face. Sooo traumatising I'm NEVER having children again! Also was in the hospital for 2 days after due to me having a fever and one of the midwives left me all day the day after my surgery with only 1 paracetamol all day The night midwife came on and said WHY HAVE YOU ONLY BEEN GIVEN 1 PARACETAMOL ALL DAY! She was fuming bless her as when she started I was crying in pain from the surgery I couldn't even sit up. She was super nice she got me pain killers straight away that helped me function she was fuming that the day midwife had left me In pain all day. Tbh i never ever want another child simply because I'm terrified of having that experience again. I told multiple midwives my baby wouldn't latch they kept saying it was me Spent 3 weeks struggling Turns out he had tongue tie that no one checked for and by the time it was found my supply dried up I was heartbroken.

I'm a mother to 8 children, and this is the very reason I became a Doula/birth worker and home birthed my children 😢 And as a Black woman, it's even worse for us, now I fight everyday for better treatment Black women, because if you take care of us you take care of all women

Nurses, Midwives and Doctors are way too stretched. Ultimately when there is persistent understaffing, quality and standards drop. Staff could take their time and show a lot more compassion if they weren't so rushed off their feet.

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

It's not about being understaffed at all, the nhs is one of the biggest employers in the world. It's all to do with the awful type of people who they hire

Huge respect for the NHS especially because my sister in law works at the same hospital I was treated, (and I know how hard some people works) but a lot of people do not understand that not all humans cope with pain the same way and some people are more tolerant then others, but that does not give them the justification of making light of someone's else extreme discomfort. This is basic lack of humanity, to have no empathy in others, this is not a lack of funds issue. Please listen to women in pain.

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

I've notice the only people who have "huge respect" for the nhs are relatives of those who working the service.

@BlackRabbitDigitalP

15 күн бұрын

@@bakedbeans9546 Because you are given the facts, not just a disgruntled nurse/doctor and then make a judgment on the whole system based on 1 interaction. I was treated as a joke by one of the male nurse while I was in a ward, I could barely walk from the pain, yet he offered no help at all because he said I could deal with it myself. All other female nurses were extremely kind to me though. So I am not going to judge the whole ward based on 1 idiot (a golden rule in life which applies to everything).

@bakedbeans9546

15 күн бұрын

@@BlackRabbitDigitalP not just "one interaction". I've faced medical malpractice from the nhs more than once, along with several people I know. My friends baby died at 7 hours old because of medical malpractice. My other friend died age 26 by medical malpractice in a&e and left 2 small children without a mother. This is a widespread problem within the nhs which people like you refuse to acknowledge.

@BP-of5cp

15 күн бұрын

​@@bakedbeans9546 I have no relatives on the NHS, and my partner had 2 very bad experiences for the first 2 births. Third one was at a different hospital and with a prenatal diagnosis for baby of a serious condition. This last time was faultless and all doctors, nurses and surgeons provided the best care. Little one is now 2 and she's still receiving the best care from the NHS. It can be unpleasant sometimes but I think when the diagnosis is a very serious one they do show their very best.

@BP-of5cp

15 күн бұрын

I would also add that they're human just like us and I like to think everyone does their best with what they have. And what they have in terms of resources is often limited. Overall like in any job mistakes can happen. But if I'd do 24 things well and 1 wrong no one at work would be blinking. Healthcare affects us personally and it's important to improve standards, but we can also talk about the 24 mothers who had a smooth/good experience.

Time for the return of the home birth and women's shared wisdom. Birth is not a medical emergency in most cases, it does not belong in the hospital as the norm.

I am a nurse and would never birth in a hospital unless I truly had to.

My biggest issues with the lot of them has been their poor attitude and being misdiagnosed 4 different things when there was NOTHING wrong with me and that was my first experience. they kept me waiting for 7 hours for basically no reason other than to stress me out to the point i discharged myself for my own sanity. That really did not help fill me with confidence for future pregnancies nor cope with PND. This time i had to go for a check and the attitude was "Look, what's the problem" What's going on" "tell me what i need to know" "why did you have IVF". i was emotional and even cried and all she gave me was an irritated attitude. Thankfully everything is fine so far but i am worried and nervous about the same or similar happening again.

This is not a first time mum problem, it is a culture within the NHS to be mean to new mums. Lack of staffing, overworked midwives and lack of equipment are often the excuses used by staffs for their lack of empathy.

The NHS is horrendous. We need to stop treating it like a national religion. Scrap the whole thing.

@naomi5495

15 күн бұрын

And go back to the Victorian era? I guess you’re a Tory then.

I had my son 37 years ago .Terribel experience .My two daughters were born in Belguim and i had a better experience .

Of course the staff are overworked and stressed out, but I do think that recruitment procedures and training have to change. We must start training our own midwives rather than recruit from other countries where we will have absolutely no control on the training they receive. From what I’ve read, this does appear to be part (not all) of the problem. It is naive for government to believe that training is consistent among all other nations.

Sounds awful and have heard anecdotally some really sad things happening. I did have amazing care from the UCLH continuity care team, if more teams like this can exist I think it would be great as they were excellent, local and I didn’t need to be in hospital for my appointments. I also managed to have a home birth for my first child (I’m 5 weeks postpartum) and for anyone low risk and considering it I would HIGHLY recommend as the experience I think was hugely better than labouring in hospital. I hope more provisions for home births are made possible.

Some nurses/midwives from a particular race are awful I've noticed.

don't like the free NHS service..... then pay your way with private healthcare.

@user-cu9cb5mx2h

15 күн бұрын

The NHS is NOT FREE, we the people pay a crazy amount in tax. Private healthcare is no better.

@Bringon-dw8dx

15 күн бұрын

@@user-cu9cb5mx2h’crazy amount’= less the most economically comparable countries

This is horrible 😢😢😢

I was traumatised to when I had my child.the nurse made it so bad for me .they stiched me twice because the practional nurse could not do it so they had to do it again what she started be removed.

I don't have children, but reading this news, l am glad that l didn't. But very sad for these mums.

@JennyAmponsah

13 күн бұрын

My thoughts exactly!

Can I sue the Nhs for mistreatment, during child birth?

@Swed813

15 күн бұрын

Yes.

@everydaywinning

15 күн бұрын

You can but they rarely admit fault

@claudipereira6729

15 күн бұрын

You can attempt to but it is really hard to sue public bodies such as the NHS. You may be successful if this was something out of the ordinary and not within the norm.

@jeanselvanadan7743

15 күн бұрын

They always hide their faults

I felt very well taken care of at Aberdeen Maternity Hospital ❤ There were a couple of cranky staff members that spoke to me poorly, but my midwife was a saint!

Wow!!!!!

I was so bullied trying to give birth to my 4th baby, as I refused the induction. They kept me 38 hours to be book for a c section, my waters broke but no labour, and my blood test before the surgery came with high risk of infection, many problems after, 5 doctors were coming in trying to convince me toninduce, my baby wasn t in a good position and he was a very big baby. The amount of intimidation was so...I had 3 natural births but sometimes that is not the best option! Also in the other 3 birth tones of other problems, lack of care! And that happens even if you go to GP, you have to beg them to give you treatment for your children! It s so dissapointing

I had my first child 40years ago very different birth due to size of my son over 10lb l can still name the midwife’s the doctor , they we’re absolutely wonderful ,

Only paracetamol and ibuprofen (when they remembered to give it which wasn't often) after an emergency c section. Wasn't allowed my mother in to help with baby. Expected to walk across the ward to get my own meals so stopped eating. The level of pain is hard to describe, but the worst thing is it's constant. And whenever I mentioned the pain or anything negative I was just told to concentrate on the baby. Yes, he's lovely, but I don't think preventable agony should be the price to pay.

I think a lot of people in the UK don’t realise that they can request/demand an elective c section. Every woman in my family has had to have an emergency c section when they tried to give “natural” birth, so I knew this was not something I wanted to risk. I was much more comfortable with the more predictable risks associated with an elective Caesarian. Birth can be so brutal and all I was told by the midwives when I said this is what I wanted was that “this is what your body was made to do”. I’m glad I knew that I could demand a c section, because going blind and “trusting” into a situation like “natural” labour and birth is not something that I was willing to accept. I tell all women I meet about this now, as we should be able to make informed choices, not shamed for not trying to go “natural”.

@evz682

15 күн бұрын

And to clarify, I should say that I had a great experience with the elective c section. Although it was difficult, as any serious surgery would be, I felt empowered and present in the moment. The situation felt calm, because it was scheduled. I did feel a bit rushed out afterwards during recovery, was out within a day, but this didn’t give me significant distress due to the fact I was prepared for that. This is such an important issue for us to discuss, grateful for this inquiry

Follow up baby mother was excellant

Hency why i say we arent lucky having nhs treatment at all...we accept bad treatment because of it...what happened with all the funding?

When people hate their lives and their jobs they don’t do well by the people in their care unfortunately.

I suffered post-natal depression after my son was born I had 6 stitches force hips and an epidural I went in at 11:30pm and had my son at 6:27am in the morning and the hospital had no air con amd it was 100 degrees june 2004 and my son was screaming and went red be a use it was to hot in that ward Didn't go home till the day after where I hadn't eaten or even had a cup of tea the whole time I was in I didn't go home till The day after at 3:30pm the next day

Poor staffing needs addressed for better care

I would rather give birth at home the callous treatment starts early from when pregnancy check ups are happening

It’s that attitude of the staff. You can have all the resources in the world, but if the staff just does not care, no amount of money / staffing will solve that issue. I’m currently experiencing this cold, sour, uncompassionate level of care where you’re treated as an inconvenience and a bother.

Look at organisations such as Birth Rights and AIMS campaign and policy work who are already tirelessly working towards bringing human rights in child birth settings and midwives like Dr Sarah Wickham and improving standards of care for women. It's a systemic problem and over obstetrics focus on child birth. Its also inherently racist and disproportionately impacts communities including Black and Brown women and birthing people, LGBTQIA+ people and those with additional and specific needs such as those living with trauma, disabilities, and/or neurodiversity

I’m 73 now but when I was 20 and having my first child there was one doctor I hated seeing on my check ups. When he examined my tummy he used to press really hard and it hurt and was gritting his teeth as he did it. Then when I was in labour and had to open my legs the doctor wasn’t happy that I hadn’t flopped my legs apart enough and he slapped me on my thigh. I’d never been in hospital before and never had a baby and being young I didn’t complain about it. As I write this I realise how wrong this was but I was far too shy and unsure of things to complain back then. Add to this a 36 hour labour and then my baby was taken away and put in an incubator so I couldn’t hold her for a few days so the whole thing wasn’t a very good experience and I think now I had post natal depression but it was never diagnosed

I’m mother of 5 , my pain was every 3 minutes still send home end give birth at home 😢

NHS has been great for me and my family.

@heatherw.3528

8 күн бұрын

You and your family are the veritable unicorns, then. Congratulations

It wasnt good when i had my twin's but im glad i wasnt lying at home on my own... some our nice some r horrible but we dont have enough peeps in the system to have a private feel to our nhs Edit... I would rather have more staff for the elderly and the cancer patients

❤❤❤

If she's acting like that she won't be getting an epidural... my screaming in agony thinking my back is going to snap unable to sit or lay for 26 hours.. All back labour for 27 hours no stomach pains. Epidural given at 26 hours. Baby born an hour later, twisted back to front.