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My daughter is about to move 5 hours away to start her 1st year of college in August. And my anxiety about this very subject is already through the roof. Every week, I talk to her about ALWAYS having at least one other person with her as much as she possibly can. That she is never to walk out in a parking lot or garage alone. To always keep a hand over any beverage she's drinking at all times. And (God forbid) if anyone ever grabs her, she needs to scratch and get as much DNA under her nails as she possibly can. I could go on and on. Not to mention the talks I have with her about what to do if she's ever caught in an active s h o o t e r situation. And it hurts my heart that these are the conversations we must have with our kids just to try & protect them when we can't be with them. Take care, everyone ❤
Aweeee. His response was perfect.
Blessed. ❤
Unexpectedly lost my dad in April of this year (2024) at 61. My parents were married nearly 37 years. He leaves his wife, 3 kids, 2 in-laws he considered his, and 4 grandkids(2 which are mine). This really HIT home.
Been married 11 years. Hasn’t gotten any easier lol
So true.
If a man does not love his wife before, during and after her pregnancy then he is shallow.
Facts
It's actually EVERY 5-7 years the marriage goes thru strain. EVERY 5-7 years. Living with the same person can be exhausting.
Loving you two ! Thank you for sharing that we can meet the right person and build continuously together. 🤍
Well done. I hope this helps other new moms.
9 years here. Didn’t happen for us
Stark contrast to Matt and Abby’s podcast on the subject, love this for you all. Makes me more hopeful too.
Years 5-8 were the best years of my marriage to my first husband and the hardest were years 24-28 after the kids left home. We got divorced after 28 years of marriage because the love was gone.
That breaks me to hear . I’m so sorry
I think having good grandparents nearby help (since i am one😂). Gives them breaks from kids and softens or defines kindly what they see in the grandchildren while loving everyone. So.. Live near interested grandparents💖
All true but you can’t possibly talk about everything and marriage is designed to bring out conflict. It’s how you choose to handle it. We all need Jesus for sure. I need Jesus.
I agree. My husband and I thought we'd adopt ( due to a neural tube defect of mine) to be safe. We ended up having a child and I wanted to adopt as well, he didn't. I dropped it so he wouldn't resent me but I have to say,I resented him fie years silently. Thankfully, we worked through it and are now going to be together 30 years this year. Continue to listen to one another and all relationships are different. Please try to not compare yourselves to others. ❤
Congratulations!
Stupid!! stopping in middle of conversation
Cause both are expensive
I love this
I feel like 16-19 also can be rocky. Rhythms shift again. Happily married 28 years. No one can truly explain how amazing it is to go through the ups and downs together.
I was pregnant when my husband and I got married so those years will probably be smooth sailing for us. Our son is as old as our marriage 😂 he will be 2 and a half next month in July
Yes but you’re only in year 2 lol
I think she’s spot on about what the therapist says. I have hate and resentment towards my husband of 7 years but I’m working on it
I do too but I’m not I can ever feel like I don’t have that feeling towards him it’s been 12 years
1-21 have been the hardest 😅
Yes and no for me. It wasn’t the kids, it was the issues that were smaller before but grew immensely after time passed by. I remember this little old lady many many years ago told me to look out for the small things that they do that annoys me. Picture them 100 times bigger. Can you live with it then? So, if your partner is a little messy and you have kids and they’re messy (because they’re kids) then guess who is getting stressed out and complaining about something they already knew, except it wasn’t a big deal then because he was just a little mess then 😂 that’s just an example it’s not my situation. My situation is the loud af chewing it’s only getting louder 😂😂😂
Year 1-3 were the bumpiest for us. We had our first baby right away. 8 years now and we have such a blessed marriage. I love my Hubs more (almost) every day 😆🤣🙌♥️ thank you God
🤷🏻♀️ that’s it? I feel like it cut off in the middle of the story.
Watch the whole episode from a few weeks ago
This is one of the many reasons i believe you should be having the "kids" conversation way before you even get engaged...i have a friend that got married to a guy and then found out after they were already married that he didnt want kids when she wanted 4 or 5 kids. Agreeing on parenting methods is even harder. This is a conversation that needs to happen ahead of time.
Sex before marriage is NOT God-ordained. The reason you never experience the deep intimacy in sex before marriage, is because God made it for the marriage bed alone. Christians need to know their Bible, if they claim to be Christ followers. This is where knowing who God is, will always give you the knowledge and wisdom about all things!!!
"Tighten up babe" has me cracking up laughing! 🤣
I thought for sure I would be authoritarian with my kid. Didn’t happen!
😂 years 5-8 we didn't even stay together. Now we're finally getting a divorce. I tried to stay for her while she had her habit and it was the worst thing I could have done cause she resented me for not letting her do weed, pills, coke, meth, and fentynal. I didn't even know she was doing all that. In the end she lied and blamed me getting upset and said I abused her. She stole money, neglected the kids the house and me, constantly lied, manipulated, and then cheated. Cheating was the final straw, so now we have the first divorce hearing in court on Tuesday
Document everything and try to get full custody because you don’t want that type of addict around the kids.
I'm so thankful to the Lord for my marriage!! That is absolutely amazing! My husband and I are coming up on our 11th year of marriage ! We've been together 13 years in total. When you marry the right one for the right reasons, marriage gets better and better with time. It was definitely hard when we started having our babies, but it was also the most fulfilling, building our little empire together ❤️ God bless all the married couples! Happy, healthy marriages are so rare nowadays.
together 10 years now, married 4 years.
It is hard me and husband been going theou a bump but figuring it out we about to hit our 9 years
Marriage is a huge undertaking. Yet when two people are committed through thick and thin it gets harder. I will admit my husband and I are 64yrs old, and I love him more than the day I met him. He has no problem telling me I love your face when I awaken. I run to look, I don't see what he sees. I know he loves me. 😘. You two have what it takes. Run away with it!
Her husband needs healing he still needs to deal with some insecurities from past issues,
We all have insecurities
He does?!?! They have talked openly about how that has been a struggle for Shawn, not Andrew.
Completely agree. Year 5-7 is the hardest. Happly Married for 26 years now.
Everyone who is dating with the intentions to start a family NEEDS to be having these discussions
Even if, you’ll never be FULLY prepared also people change. I think at the end of the day marriage is about compromise.
@@SJ-qf2tz this is true. I was very laid back but when I had kids a helicopter 🚁 came out of me. 😂 but it’s good to be self aware. I preach self awareness because doing the work from within helps a ton.
After almost 38 years of marriage I’ve learned that the seven year bump is real… every seven years my marriage has encountered rough patches and change. I’m prepared for them… but it’s interesting looking back at my marriage and seeing the difficulties we encountered and overcame, throughout the years. And for some reason, it appears to be that, in seven year increments, we encountered difficulty.
How are you handling the metrics of this? Ex: date nights? Are you tracking this on a spreadsheet? Trying to find an automated way to collect the data
Very cute married couple love it 🥰
The glasses are a hard NO. Very rude
Andrew did explain in the last episode he's having trouble with his eyes currently and light hurts. So the glasses help with the sensitivity.
He has a stye that may need surgery.
I am over half way through this episode for the SECOND time today! I think I will listen again! Please pray my husband will watch this! I sent it to him and asked him to watch it. But he is not always good about that…. So please pray with me, for every marriage not just mine, that may have one partner who is not as enthusiastic about this!! Thank you thank you thank you Shawn and Andrew for this message!!!
SO TRUE!
This is so helpful! 37 weeks tomorrow🙌🏼
God Bless🙏🏼🥰❤️
It's okay to love someone but not like them in the moment, whether it be something they said or did.
My husband has come to find me a mile away from home and walked me home before. There was a guy following me who just came out of the woods and my dog was freaking out watching him. The second I called my husband came to get me. That is just one instance of many. My Garmin has him as an emergency contact and he can track every walk or run and gets emergency notifications for this reason.
I have tracking on all my girls phones. I have four girls and I’m not taking any chances. They are all young women and in this day, who knows what could happen. My husband tracks all five of us too. It just gives him peace of mind knowing that if anything would happen, he would have access to the last location!! It’s a very sad and scary thing that needs to be done.