Early Morning Barking - Talking About BPD & NPD
Early Morning Barking - Talking About BPD & NPD
Hi, I'm Rich and welcome to my channel. This is a place where I share my personal journey with Borderline Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Personality Disorder, two cluster b personality disorders that affect my emotions, relationships, and sense of self. I'm not a professional therapist, but I hope that by talking about my experiences, I can help others who are struggling with similar issues, or who want to learn more about these conditions.
On this channel, you'll find videos where I discuss topics such as coping skills, triggers, therapy, medication, stigma, and more. I also answer questions from viewers and share some of the resources that have helped me along the way.
My goal is to create a supportive and informative community for people who have BPD and NPD, or who care about someone who does. If you're interested in joining me on this journey, please subscribe and hit the bell icon to get notified when I upload new videos.
Thanks for watching and I'll see you soon.
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5:11 this frustrates me. Some people take it as me mocking them. And it’s not on Purpose. It’s my way of saying I like you. I had to learn to stop and be myself but even that feels weird
My ex had BPD, she started splitting around 5 months in, by month 6 it became so frequent, the attacks would get deep and personal, she’d bring up my vulnerabilities that I told her about and use them against me to get a reaction. Then when I would finally snap, yell back, etc. I’d leave and be done with her, only to want her back and be the one apologizing the next day. It never stopped it got more and more frequent until she took things to hitting me, I left and she called 10x the next day realizing how bad she messed up… then I said please don’t contact me. She cut me off so fast after that, weird experience. Rollercoaster… I became so trauma bonded. But I saw the signs and ignored them because i kept thinking the idealization and mirroring would re-appear (it would last a week at most). It was insane she could snap in 5 minutes over things a normal person wouldn’t even raise their voice over. Wouldn’t do it in public, would wait until we were alone, not even in front of her roommate.
I had to recently release a favorite person too and have struggled with it.
I m not disordered. I personally know you aren t all master manipulators like presented. U aren t in touch w reality like aspd. Behaviors yes as w bpd who are considered ok.. Most online are ND (in fb groups of victims" of "narcs" it s ND)..so i assumed the same that this comes from somewhere. Maybe from online coaches/psychologists who address to ND..? How it s possible to live in narcissistic societies w promoted such values/behaviors & everyone discovered the evil "narc"? Evil or not i don t accept moral element from psychologists -online obviously. It s a whole industry
I have to agree. I have had only one girl I have had this happen with and yes I absolutely wanted her and she probably could have cared less or so it seems.
I’m constantly working on dealing with this because I am tired of being passive aggressive.
You know what's funny. I still don't feel fine about being myself after facing my traumas. I'm at the end of trauma therapy and now I got 2 new tattoos, a piercing and a fringe. 🤷Not sure if I'll ever be comfortable with who I am.
Why is basically every comment demonizing pwBPD and acting like if you’re friends with one they’ll abuse you
I’m coming out with a book. If successful I’ll keep you posted. Are you glad enough as I am?
Thank you! Very accurate description. I was wondering.. if I go to work and put on my happy face so nobody can see how sad / incompetent I feel and then have a conversation with somebody, giving compliments on outfits/... and asking how he/she is doing without actually having a great interest, is that also a manipulation? Because I want people to like me, think I have it all together even though I don't really care about what they're saying? Would this example also be a mix of BPD and NPD masking?
This is so interesting I'm sure it’s what my friend of 50 years has. I’ve experienced either full love yous, or nasty remarks, saying she doesn’t care about this or that,or what I say. Then the next time all is normal for her. I’ve endured a lot , and her me , life happens but not like this time. She just split black on me it sounds exactly like this; after imagining me breaking a dinner out together, imagined I was snubbing her (because I missed her calls during the day, they went right into voice mail I didn’t know about) , and imagining me going out of town to another g friends place , instead of our dinner. It was all in her mind. I have never in our life shunned our plans for someone else. I showed up at the restaurant and was told she cancelled the reservation an hour before. Her explanation by email was the above stinky thinking. Now she tells me she’s going through health issues she does not want to discuss. Fine I respect that. But not her last line of “if I feel better I’ll call you”. She has never told me what’s wrong!!! This time I am going to let it AND her go, give her space and respect, and hope her health returns someday.
Is there something that would make you tell your non that nothing is wrong when there clearly is? Or would this be more of something that happens during a devaluation?
I dated a guy for 6 months who at the start was going so well, but 3 months in he became very obsessive. It got too much & i felt smothered. Felt guilty for wanting to see friends & family. I asked for space & he refused saying we have to be together all the time. He wanted physical affection ALL the time which got a bit much. I ended up breaking up with him because i couldnt cope with it which was hard because i did care for him. We ended up hanging out as friends & although i had feelings for him i was reluctant to get back with him because didnt want the feeling of being trapped & wanting to run away from him. I told him to make friends and find some hobbies. It wasnt until he shut me out that he did start to find and work on himself. He wouldn't have got there had we stayed together because he relied on me for his happiness.
I tried with my marriage. Therapy and everything. In the end she took the kids and was trying to ruin my life in every possible manner. They can be petty and vindictive. My advice: Go no contact. Many professional therapist DON'T even know how to treat these people properly. I will do my understanding from aDISTANCE. THANK YOU, for this video. When I told her I have proof of our arguments and false accusations (Recordings), She backed off!!!. Haven't had a problem for months now.😂😂😂 They can be dangerous. Record.
Thank You. I was recently diagnosed with BPD at 47 and I'm just learning that I'm not crazy and there are others like me. I'm trying to learn as much as I can so the later years of my life don't have to be so hard and maybe I can find happiness or if nothing else, peace.
Who in the realms of reality is going to put up with this ,they can piss right off the bat
This is exactly me. How do I let go of my favourite person permanently. I don't want to kill myself coz I'm going crazy
You just helped me understand so much about myself. Thank you.
Wait, I might have Bpd my friends are perfect but the bpd started when one of my friends started crying I didn’t know what to do so I started panicking I said nothing I was Panicking And ever since then I’ve had a fear of someone Leaving me
I have BPD and have split on my friend/favorite person more times than I’d like to admit. The last time was two months ago and it was bad. I found this video then and considered sending it to him but didn’t. I hadn’t heard back since, even I tried fixing it. It’s probably reached the point where it’s irreparable. I’ve watched this video and read the comments many times since then and I never really considered how abusive my words and actions were. To those who chose not to accept your friend with BPD back in your lives, I don’t blame you at all.
This is interesting. Psychology is so layered and esoteric in nature. But I’ve noticed in myself that hyper sexuality and obsessive sexuality has represented a couple things to me., It is sort of a escape from real life yes, but I think looking deeper it’s really catering to an insecurity that I have stemming from my teenage years. Being a shy young man and rather insecure, I didn’t have a lot of the experiences that many of my friends had. Later in life when I found that confidence I almost inexorably became hyper focused on sexual gratification. I realize inside of me every time I got to that sexual experience, a little kids voice inside of me was saying, “see you are desirable”. I don’t think it’s the sex as much as it’s the validation of someone’s self worth they think they don’t have.
Aidonia that blah feeling?
You can be physically empty it's called hunger, especially diabetic individuals. You have such a nice accent.
It’s a mind f*#% and highly confusing
I needed this today. I was losing my favorite person to someone else, and I ended up splitting when I realized I couldn’t have him anymore. I tried to apologize but the damage was done. I had to go cold turkey and completely cut him out and right now I am trying to release him with what little dignity I have left. Thank you for sharing because this is so difficult for people to comprehend.
I feel so comfortable after reading the comments I realized that iam not alone and that we are all feeling the same
I get obssesed so fast I don't need to know someone, I idealised or even make up the lerson in my mind completely. I wanted to have a rule to cut contact when I'm becoming obsessed with someone but I don't even have any contact with my fp in the first place, it gets worse. I only saw photos and videos of him and I automatically made him up in my head and he won't leave until I find another. I'm sick
❤❤
Not BPD or NPD, but my ex has ASPD, we broke up like a week ago. He kept saying I had NPD etc. Before we broke up his therapist was also pointing to a NPD diagnosis, to go along with the ASPD. When he heard that he came home & said “I’m just like you now” like wtf. I don’t consider myself narcissistic whatsoever. Why would he ever even think that? Especially if he himself probably has it.
Nice one, brother.💯
That's the way it is👌🏼
You really do have a great way with words. I've always thought that. And your growth is apparent (personal growth not beard. Although the beard is looking great too)
Thank you very much! 😊
Thank you for creating and sharing.
Thanks for watching!
When people lack insight, it's incredibly difficult for them to see you as an individual. Unfortunately BPD makes people self centred and with the lack of insight,it is like dealing with an infant at times. I think it's important to remember that BPD can be cured, so long as the person is engaging in therapy ❤
I prefer the bottles like that.
Say if I notice that this is happening to me. Would me saying that I'm not going anywhere help..?
I came to your channel to try and understand what my friend with bpd is going through. I stumbled onto this video, and it is speaking to me on so many different levels! I struggle to communicate verbally about anything, everything.
I love this and will send this to my loved one until I’m ready to forgive. Thank you
For me, I'm working so hard to get better - that sometimes I worry I'm becoming the 'I'm getting better person' so I make sure to also not make my journey to self improvement to be 'who I am' but it's hard with BPD because I feel like I often just 'become' what I'm focused on at the time because again, the emptiness. But I 100% agree with what you are saying here.
I watch these videos over and over again. I relate to most of it.
What you are disgusting is extremely stigmatising. Excuse my spelling. My now ex, only recently. He had a sex addiction, I knew he is BPD, I could always say NPD but I know the difference. He's now from me been reported to the police. Regardless of mental health. There is a point of where anyone with BPD needs to understand what they are doing has a concicence, not just damaging YOUR life, it's other people's! The something they get out of it is power. You have to be vauge because you can't be honest! Just be honest on your channel.
This isn't a unique issue. But it is particularly damaging to those with mental health maladies. It's imperative to acknowledge, accept, and adjust... Not embody, whatever it is.
I wish there was more understanding and support.
My gf had bpd and npd I loved her but she treated me like shit started losing my mind had to let her go, still think of her
"F**k my life" 🙄😂😂😂😂