You are amazing I too have had BPD for many years 36 to be exact. I had the 6 sessions that you have to have prior to starting the actual DBT therapy. This was only offered to me 28 years into my illness after waking up on the Life Support after yet another off the scale determined Suicide attempt. For some reason Jesus keeps saving me time after time when I do a thorough attempt. Intensive Care Unit Life Support being given the last rights several times. Police sitting next to my hospital bed waiting to tell there Sergeant time of death. The only thing I can think of is fulfilling my ambitions of writing my unbelievable life story so that it can show others to surviving against the odds on any circumstance is possible and to encourage people to keep fighting and never to lose hope. Also I would love to raise funds to open a sanctuary for Lost Souls misunderstood unwanted people who have lost everything and have nothing and nobody. A place staffed that damaged people will find kindred spirits. People who they can feel like family and a place they feel loved and welcome...a place they can call home. Love to you. Jessica Bell xxx
@sherrychunter119418 күн бұрын
No sound
@tonyaferguson4838Ай бұрын
Thank you Jamie! 🤍
@bunglejoy3645Ай бұрын
So really its as ive said to m y psychatrist it shouldn't be called disorder cos it mini mises this condition its really a change in personality ok somes depression snd anxiety as well 1 prior to mum dying in 2014 i was her carer i was reasonably happy on some days got e xcited doing so mething in itresting two motning a werk we set thing aside to do crafts together,to chat, to laugh snd at weeke to snuggle toether to watch strictly, dancing on ice olympics when it was on, wed cuddle and say goodnight and kiss do gardening together before mum became as b ad go on walksc together till on 2014 mjm died i was sort of gettingby 2015 things detiorated i wen t on sick come 2017 i cracked up completdly had a sucide attemptc was in a mental health unit 8 month moved into sheltered housing was diagnosed with severe depression BPD and paronia some pdychosis type episodes ptobls autism i want the old me back im into vomputers but no intrest n watching tv at all im in sheltered housi g so tv licrnse is only 90p a week, since 2015 not watched strictly cant focus no longer intrested, i do art work, listen to mudic on you tube, have my computers but i really miss the old me
@th8257Ай бұрын
NPD is actually roughly around as common in women as in men - but it is massively under diagnosed because of the sexual stereotypes demonstrated here - that NPD and ASPD are men's conditions and BPD and HPD are women's. In fact men and women are quite capable of having any of them. They often just manifest slightly differently in men and women, in ways that are missed by people who are preoccupied with the gender stereotypes.
@justice8563Ай бұрын
This is silly. No way would any of this would work on high conflict people. This would trigger them to become even more aggressive and abusive. Mickey Mousing this, will get people hurt who are tormented and controlled by high conflict people.
@axewieldingmilenaАй бұрын
And don't you understand that we use overcontrol as a defense mechanism for our bpd and ourselves??
@axewieldingmilenaАй бұрын
You talk about us BPD people as if we were idiots who can't understand what emotions and so on is okay to show in public. As if we just all splash out with our emotions to everyone all the time, when in reality we hide our emotions and try to press them down and be like everyone else as much as possible and often succeed with this very well. We try to act normal as much as possible always and we're not exploding with emotions everywhere we go all the time because we know it's not gonna lead to anything good. So how can you say that we're always undercontrolled in public when it's actually the opposite? We try our hardest to be in control and then end up being overcontrolled all the time in public and don't let anyone into our lives really because we're so stuck up and tight and do everything we can to hide all our emotions.
@axewieldingmilenaАй бұрын
You are wrong about the over control thing. Almost all BPD people struggle with overcontrol, to fit in and repress our emotions and try to not have any of them because they cause so much destruction in our lives.
@axewieldingmilenaАй бұрын
But I do have BPD and I use overcontrolloing behaviour to hide my bpd from everyone. So I don't understand why you say you can't be bpd and have overcontrol. Overcontrol is the only way for me to function in society as a normal contributing member of society. Overcontrolling is my tool to survive as a bpd patient. So I don't understand what you are talking about
@Ikr2025Ай бұрын
Starting to think I might qualify for this. Or cptsd. As a child I was mainly treated with contempt if I expressed my emotions and it was brushed off when I ever got angry. No one ever took me seriously about anything. I was easy to dismiss because I was the youngest child, a girl and my parents and brother were all first borns and quite highly narcissistic. I try to be respectful of my own children now and take their emotions seriously in a way mine never were. My main issues are getting excessively angry when I feel anxious and tired at the same time. Or waking up feeling angry and depressed. It’s worse if I don’t get any time alone to process my emotions and think of solutions to problems and ways to calm myself down. I need to be alone to do that or possibly talk with an empathetic supportive person, its v hard to get either. My husband is a dismissive avoidant so I need time away from him as he is not able or willing to provide emotional support although he is good with practical support.
@jaderalves4693Ай бұрын
2:53 HOPE
@milflowers767Ай бұрын
Can a professional mental health practitioner reach out to Dr Ladia, child psychiatrist at the San Diegos Douglas Young and Family Services regarding these symptoms and need for appropriate DBT skills for Clinicians to learn. My son was taken to Mesa Vista Hospital instead of Children's Hospital where he could have been under 30 days of observation. He took his life away only a few weeks after second hospital suicidal attempt. I'm tired of hearing and seeing 988 commercials, the communication is flawed between psychiatrists, clinicians and school psychologists and counselors. Our kids are intelligent and caring. If everyone turns a blind eye so will their willingness to live.
@mickithompson2831Ай бұрын
I am looking for an agency in the Dayton, Tx area. I have a family member with the beginnings of dementia that needs help with taking medications and home health. Even if they are in Baytown that would work. Please let me know if we can get help.
@Thegyspy1112 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing
@BuffaloTracers2 ай бұрын
What a great presentation.
@drkarenbukharibukhari99312 ай бұрын
Prediabetes result in diabetes as my beloved parent father was diabetic
@drkarenbukharibukhari99312 ай бұрын
Nice lectures
@erykahbadont66052 ай бұрын
Thank you for this ♥️
@brizzchizz73022 ай бұрын
What scares me is that I have traits in all three Classes A B C. I’m extremely to myself barely talk to a Soul haven’t worked in a year and have bouts of Anxiety fear depressive symptoms and no impulse control. Damn the mind can be a scary thing. Exercise and Sun are vital though and can help minimize symptoms
@purplefinch292 ай бұрын
27:50 When I had meltdowns as a child I was met with anger That’s why I’m so defensive and shut down now
@purplefinch292 ай бұрын
Amazing video I love the demon boat analogy!
@CharlieBadass2 ай бұрын
This lady is just like the man who lived with the bears. They killed and ate him. Having been married to a person with BPD I saw first hand that they (BPD person) can control some things, such as, They know there are people that will NOT stand for their temper and tantrums and must behave around. They seem to control their emotions just fine when they are love bombing. The second they succeed in their end game of getting you to want THEM , they Will discard you. If/when they gain power over another person they are sadistic. Malevolent creatures.
@killthecatradio2 ай бұрын
THANK YOU for this!
@goblinsRule3 ай бұрын
Love is all, the other person needs.
@agaelliot3 ай бұрын
this is what is going on with Trump except he inherited millions
@martingd7773 ай бұрын
This is excellent. I have watched easily around 1,000 videos on BPD in the last months (audhd and infj ;) ) and this was just perfectly and compassionately explained with perfect visuals. The most devastating thing about BPD was the love of my life and her family not believing i had no idea what i did or what happened.. i sent 20,000 word apologies while still in the dissociative hangover. Thank you. Maybe one day I’ll be able to fix this situation, but i have to be healed first.
@k.s7833 ай бұрын
Let’s be honest, individuals with BPD are easily slighted and they go to attack. They are emotionally rigid and inflexible. In other words, they can be insufferable and stressful to live with. BPD sometimes seems like a justification for bad behaviors. It should be described as the asshole disorder, because that’s exactly how they act. After 20 years of living with a person like this I’m DONE. My patience and tolerance has run dry.
@k.s7833 ай бұрын
It’s mainly disabling for people around the person with the disorder. Most of the time these individuals lack the ability to self-reflect and take accountability for their actions. People who encourage others to be patient and supportive of someone who repeatedly treats others like crap probably haven’t lived with someone with BPD. Call it a disorder and blame it on trauma, but that doesn’t make their behaviors any less hurtful and destructive. I don’t agree that people with BPD can tune into other people’s emotions - that makes zero sense. Someone who doesn’t understand their own emotions isn’t going to read others accurately. This is partly why they overreact to others. It’s a very strange claim to make since it’s completely inaccurate.
@CharlieBadass2 ай бұрын
They are definitely HIGHLY in tune into others emotions. They use that skill set to manipulate, retaliate for “perceived” transgressions and to do damage control.
@k.s7833 ай бұрын
I have lived with a person with borderline personality for over 20 years and it’s been hell on earth. Sometimes I wonder if we are simply labeling a manipulative, angry and narcissistic individual with a disorder? After years of being patient and tolerant of their abusive behaviors I have a very hard time feeling ANY kind of empathy for them. The relationship has ruined my life and our family. Encouraging people to support someone who often treats others like crap and lacks the ability to take ownership is a lot to ask.
@Stopnormalizingviolence3 ай бұрын
BPD can be officially diagnosed before age 18. I was officially diagnosed at age 16 in a hospital, and many others I know have been diagnosed even younger. It's the one exception in the DSM-5. The information in this video is outdated and stigmatizing.
@Lillian5843 ай бұрын
There are just too many inaccuracies in this video.
@JGH2015Sara3 ай бұрын
Please someone answer me that how can I deal with my son that has BPD and before I suffered with my ex and my sister in law for many many years and I’m so tired and sick!!💔
@rodking7794 ай бұрын
The people I know that are narcissist are very successful.
@ciaraskeleton4 ай бұрын
I used to nanny for a teenager who had RAD, ADHD, learning difficulties, FASD and ASPD, probably ODD. She had been abused and then she was adopted and I worked for her adopted family. I was close to the family and I'd known her since she'd been adopted into the family, so I watched her go from a toddler into an adult. In my time spent with her, I rarely experienced her 'bad' behaviours. She liked me because I was adopted too and for some reason still unknown to me she was always brilliant in my care and I really enjoyed caring for her. However, outside of that, she stabbed her teaches, assaulted other kids, teens or adults, she would run away and legitimately go insane distance and end up in the most crazy dangerous situations, the police were at the house almost every night. As she entered adulthood she spent a short time living in the community but due to her behaviour that became immediately unsafe. She was dangerously promiscuous (I mean that as literally and as clinically as possible), she threatened local gangs and ended up with threats on her life, she best up random people and got beat up, and throughout all of this, she did not ever understand what she was doing wrong. She did not have any remorse, ever because her brain was not at all wired to have it. She didn't understand danger or consequence. She was known to all local police stations and ended up being put out of each area she lived in. Her behaviour became so violent and unmanageable that her family had to send her to live in a residential psychiatric hospital, where she is medicated and kept safe from herself and everyone else. The family were never given support and during her childhood the schools had no idea how to deal with her. I believe if those 2 things were different back then, in childhood, that things could have ended up better, as ASPD or the precursing symptoms are certainly aggravated by the further social trauma or negativity experienced by the person. There are ways to intervene and at least steer a child or teenager in a more productive direction regardless of the disorder. I think past childhood there's very little that can be done to help those with Aspd, unless they present and ask for help themselves, which Is going to be a rare occurrence as they don't necessarily see themselves as being disordered.
@ninakanth4 ай бұрын
Dear All, I need some help. I have been diagnosed with BPD 4 months ago and started on therapy. I live in the UK but my partner needs help. I was wondering if there was a support group for partners of those with BPD. She needs someone she can talk to, who can understand and help explain or make sense of our situation. Does anyone know of anybody who offers this service?
@angelamossucco21904 ай бұрын
❤❤❤
@polyphonic_peanut4 ай бұрын
This is an unfortunately misguided and poor representation of the disorder. It adds to stigma. NPD is a debilitating condition, but people can get better. The key things that people with NPD need are empathy and compassion. I am not finding either of these in this presentation.
@craigbromiley78374 ай бұрын
Did anyone call you a narcissist. Because that is what has happened to me.
@LisaValentine1Ай бұрын
You’ve been gaslighted to the point of psychological murder… if you’ve turned into “them”, at any point, it was reactive abuse and it was only to defend yourself. I’m convinced this disorder is caused primarily by the environment (the people around you).
@user-um9sl1kj6u5 ай бұрын
Part of the language issue shows up as triangulation. They can’t talk directly. They stalk like a predator.
@dannymartinez83145 ай бұрын
My wife, well the person i thought i married over 19+ years ago, has over the years started to become mean and showing hatred for me, 3 months ago I was tired of it and through with it so I asked her for divorce and seriously told her that I meant it this time, I've asked that we go see a couples therapy and she would stone wall me like she always done. I started to find letters adrenal entries net worth from multiple years but there was some that were addressed to me but never given to me written in Spanish which I do not fully read and in these journal entries it was nothing but talking bad about me has she talked about regretting marry me and that how she was not in love and going to leave me because she wasn't happy, but she never talked to me about these feelings and hid them from me in fact those years that she wrote them I don't remember her being unhappy I could tell something was wrong but she led me to believe everything I have family photos that would say otherwise but then these letters stated different I've been gaslighting in the thinking times are good when they went for her but yet she stayed with me for these 19 plus years so I remember storing some stuff in our shed that was some of mine and some of hers I remember she placed in these journals that I know she had but never never had a need to because they were her private belongings, but curiosity has got the best of me and I acquire them before she had me arrested on falls Church of domestic battery what she said I had pulled her hair and she got a restraining order on me and no contact I was deeply saddened by everything she had did without remorse, i read a little better Spanish then before and as i began to read them, one dated 2 months before we married, she talked about how depressed she was and where her life was going and that she had to believe in God and keep good thoughts in her head to better her future she talked to her she could not trust or confide in anybody because no one valued the thought she had in her head and that people just weren't trustworthy and because she was a trustworthy person she was taking advantage of and never trusted nobody even men because of her experience men always say there's something that they're not and they are just unworthy and it can't be trusted and then when I met her she thought I was the Prince charming Knight on a white horse to save her from all of this horrible world she was living in and I did love her as she did me we got married and moved from Mexico to Houston and everything was going good I thought it was a little hard in the beginning but got better a year later she got pregnant with my first kid and when I would come home I noticed that she was feeling sad I had asked her what was the matter she was saying nothing and then she started crying telling me I'm sorry I'm sorry and I asked her what are you telling me you're sorry for, I knew she missed her family and because we didn't have no other family around us and he used in I know she was alone when I was at work and I work by the job so I would always come home at the same time I would buy her calling cards so she can call her mother during the day back in 2004 we didn't have cell phones or I didn't at least and we didn't have a landline at the house but the apartments we lived in had to pay phone right by the laundromat but when she was pregnant about 3 months before she having the baby I talked to my dad who is here in California and he was talking about how he needed someone help you know and since we were in the same tradeand she had family over here in California I made the decision to move us to California from Houston so she can have family to be around that could visit her or she could visit in those journals she talked about how she loved me and that I was a prince charming and that she was kind of afraid about how things were going to go and she had to keep good thoughts in your head and not disappoint me and how much she missed your parents and you wish you could go back and wasn't too sure if she was going to be happy being married to me and that 3 months when we got married after we got she started talking about how disappointed she wasn't me and that I wasn't doing enough and I need to find a different job to make more money and just talking about all these things that was nothing but downplaying me and now she was wanting to leave me to go back home because she regretted marry me but yet these things she you never told me she kept them to herself and made me believe everything was good and she was happy and had two more kids with me not only was my heart broken when she had me arrested about false claims of pulling your hair and getting restraining order on me to where I cannot be around my family no more it broke my heart even more reading all these things and started beginning to realize all the things in the past that happened but it was all really about find me the prices of divorcing her and that is even more heart-wrenching than anything I'm thinking about presenting these papers to have her mentally evaluating and I'm thinking of not doing it I don't know what I should do I know that discharge of domestic batteryis not true in falsified by her which prevents me from getting anything out of the divorce including having custody of my kids I have been at home or stay at home dad for the last child who is 2 years old since he was born and and stop working so she could work and she has been the breadwinner since 2016 I still do side jobs every once in awhile but she is the primary breadwinner and I was proud of her and she took advantage of that and doesn't care nothing about me not having a place to go or not having a job because I stayed home taking care of our kids sleeping in my car and it's cold winter nights and because of the season no one is hiring for work she has no remorse and doesn't care,
@zevan61475 ай бұрын
My arms are open 😁
@serenaroseauthentics13915 ай бұрын
I poured my heart and soul into a man with bpd only to be told he thought I was an agent of the devil out to get him and that I was the cause for his illness. I was shattered and devastated. I went above and beyond for him. What a kick in the teeth. If I was ever upset there was zero concern for me. He got so wrapped up in his own emotions because he assumed I must be upset because of him and must therefore be blaming him in my head. Zero compassion, empathy or support shown to me. Fully self absorbed in his own intense feelings. He said he feared abandonment, but the only one being emotionally abandoned was me. I really loved him. 😢
@alkeegan99155 ай бұрын
Excellent presentation. Well explained. Clear with concise accurate data points. BPD is a curse of an illness and the people who suffer from it deserve help and healing. They , like everybody, have intrinsic human value and merit peace and comfort in their lives.
@bunglejoy3645Ай бұрын
Thank you I have bpd znd other multiple conditions
@tanjabelegisanin61565 ай бұрын
Psihopatice, ja sam oduševljena vašim mozgovima. Ako je glavna šifra granični poremećaj ličnosti onda zaista vas treba proučavati i posmatrati. Kako bolesni mozgovi klinički manipuliše te i patološki lažete plus UŽIVANJE u zlostavljanju proganjanju ljudi do smrti i za to krivite druge. Vaši mozgovi koje god dijagnoze da su tu sa vašom visokom inteligencijom i tim ludilom su savršeni spoj za manipulusanje normalnim, ali naivnima kao što sam ja.
@jasminherbick95605 ай бұрын
I'm currently taking my casac and I just wanted to say I really enjoyed ur seminar, thank you very much.
@Jhawk_2k5 ай бұрын
30:38 I heard about a study done on monks that showed that they have a very similar reaction to this type of countdown to stimulus. Pretty interesting to see how some aspects of "enlightened" individuals have parallels to certain pathologies. It's like they can decide when to use the prefrontal cortex when necessary. Brain scans of monks are so interesting.
@julisplett27482 ай бұрын
That's a fascinating parallel! It's my understanding that meditation affects the pre-frontal cortex.
@cleoc66985 ай бұрын
People with NPD can actually be very successful but you often have to look at how they became that way to get the full picture. A lot of manipulation, purposeful actions in certain dynamics, and drive towards being better than everyone else to feed their narcissism.
@larissamays99766 ай бұрын
I always wanted someone to love me like i do them. Or put as much energy into me as i do them. But now i see that they literally cant do that. We invest our all into people which is not normal i guess. Wish it was though. I just dont know how to get rid of that resentment and intense anger that comes from the thought of my man not investing himself in me like i think he should. Constantly paranoid, stressed that hes going to find someone better or with more to offer and trash me. Its so exhausting and i know its irrational. But my brain sure thinks its an immanent threat. And im sabatoging tf out of my relationship and pushing him away to gaurd myself from this "inevitable" threat. My brain tells me its a sure thing that hes going to cheat or abandon me and i know he wouldnt. Constant battle between my fked up brain and reason. I'm exhausted
Пікірлер
You are amazing I too have had BPD for many years 36 to be exact. I had the 6 sessions that you have to have prior to starting the actual DBT therapy. This was only offered to me 28 years into my illness after waking up on the Life Support after yet another off the scale determined Suicide attempt. For some reason Jesus keeps saving me time after time when I do a thorough attempt. Intensive Care Unit Life Support being given the last rights several times. Police sitting next to my hospital bed waiting to tell there Sergeant time of death. The only thing I can think of is fulfilling my ambitions of writing my unbelievable life story so that it can show others to surviving against the odds on any circumstance is possible and to encourage people to keep fighting and never to lose hope. Also I would love to raise funds to open a sanctuary for Lost Souls misunderstood unwanted people who have lost everything and have nothing and nobody. A place staffed that damaged people will find kindred spirits. People who they can feel like family and a place they feel loved and welcome...a place they can call home. Love to you. Jessica Bell xxx
No sound
Thank you Jamie! 🤍
So really its as ive said to m y psychatrist it shouldn't be called disorder cos it mini mises this condition its really a change in personality ok somes depression snd anxiety as well 1 prior to mum dying in 2014 i was her carer i was reasonably happy on some days got e xcited doing so mething in itresting two motning a werk we set thing aside to do crafts together,to chat, to laugh snd at weeke to snuggle toether to watch strictly, dancing on ice olympics when it was on, wed cuddle and say goodnight and kiss do gardening together before mum became as b ad go on walksc together till on 2014 mjm died i was sort of gettingby 2015 things detiorated i wen t on sick come 2017 i cracked up completdly had a sucide attemptc was in a mental health unit 8 month moved into sheltered housing was diagnosed with severe depression BPD and paronia some pdychosis type episodes ptobls autism i want the old me back im into vomputers but no intrest n watching tv at all im in sheltered housi g so tv licrnse is only 90p a week, since 2015 not watched strictly cant focus no longer intrested, i do art work, listen to mudic on you tube, have my computers but i really miss the old me
NPD is actually roughly around as common in women as in men - but it is massively under diagnosed because of the sexual stereotypes demonstrated here - that NPD and ASPD are men's conditions and BPD and HPD are women's. In fact men and women are quite capable of having any of them. They often just manifest slightly differently in men and women, in ways that are missed by people who are preoccupied with the gender stereotypes.
This is silly. No way would any of this would work on high conflict people. This would trigger them to become even more aggressive and abusive. Mickey Mousing this, will get people hurt who are tormented and controlled by high conflict people.
And don't you understand that we use overcontrol as a defense mechanism for our bpd and ourselves??
You talk about us BPD people as if we were idiots who can't understand what emotions and so on is okay to show in public. As if we just all splash out with our emotions to everyone all the time, when in reality we hide our emotions and try to press them down and be like everyone else as much as possible and often succeed with this very well. We try to act normal as much as possible always and we're not exploding with emotions everywhere we go all the time because we know it's not gonna lead to anything good. So how can you say that we're always undercontrolled in public when it's actually the opposite? We try our hardest to be in control and then end up being overcontrolled all the time in public and don't let anyone into our lives really because we're so stuck up and tight and do everything we can to hide all our emotions.
You are wrong about the over control thing. Almost all BPD people struggle with overcontrol, to fit in and repress our emotions and try to not have any of them because they cause so much destruction in our lives.
But I do have BPD and I use overcontrolloing behaviour to hide my bpd from everyone. So I don't understand why you say you can't be bpd and have overcontrol. Overcontrol is the only way for me to function in society as a normal contributing member of society. Overcontrolling is my tool to survive as a bpd patient. So I don't understand what you are talking about
Starting to think I might qualify for this. Or cptsd. As a child I was mainly treated with contempt if I expressed my emotions and it was brushed off when I ever got angry. No one ever took me seriously about anything. I was easy to dismiss because I was the youngest child, a girl and my parents and brother were all first borns and quite highly narcissistic. I try to be respectful of my own children now and take their emotions seriously in a way mine never were. My main issues are getting excessively angry when I feel anxious and tired at the same time. Or waking up feeling angry and depressed. It’s worse if I don’t get any time alone to process my emotions and think of solutions to problems and ways to calm myself down. I need to be alone to do that or possibly talk with an empathetic supportive person, its v hard to get either. My husband is a dismissive avoidant so I need time away from him as he is not able or willing to provide emotional support although he is good with practical support.
2:53 HOPE
Can a professional mental health practitioner reach out to Dr Ladia, child psychiatrist at the San Diegos Douglas Young and Family Services regarding these symptoms and need for appropriate DBT skills for Clinicians to learn. My son was taken to Mesa Vista Hospital instead of Children's Hospital where he could have been under 30 days of observation. He took his life away only a few weeks after second hospital suicidal attempt. I'm tired of hearing and seeing 988 commercials, the communication is flawed between psychiatrists, clinicians and school psychologists and counselors. Our kids are intelligent and caring. If everyone turns a blind eye so will their willingness to live.
I am looking for an agency in the Dayton, Tx area. I have a family member with the beginnings of dementia that needs help with taking medications and home health. Even if they are in Baytown that would work. Please let me know if we can get help.
Thank you so much for sharing
What a great presentation.
Prediabetes result in diabetes as my beloved parent father was diabetic
Nice lectures
Thank you for this ♥️
What scares me is that I have traits in all three Classes A B C. I’m extremely to myself barely talk to a Soul haven’t worked in a year and have bouts of Anxiety fear depressive symptoms and no impulse control. Damn the mind can be a scary thing. Exercise and Sun are vital though and can help minimize symptoms
27:50 When I had meltdowns as a child I was met with anger That’s why I’m so defensive and shut down now
Amazing video I love the demon boat analogy!
This lady is just like the man who lived with the bears. They killed and ate him. Having been married to a person with BPD I saw first hand that they (BPD person) can control some things, such as, They know there are people that will NOT stand for their temper and tantrums and must behave around. They seem to control their emotions just fine when they are love bombing. The second they succeed in their end game of getting you to want THEM , they Will discard you. If/when they gain power over another person they are sadistic. Malevolent creatures.
THANK YOU for this!
Love is all, the other person needs.
this is what is going on with Trump except he inherited millions
This is excellent. I have watched easily around 1,000 videos on BPD in the last months (audhd and infj ;) ) and this was just perfectly and compassionately explained with perfect visuals. The most devastating thing about BPD was the love of my life and her family not believing i had no idea what i did or what happened.. i sent 20,000 word apologies while still in the dissociative hangover. Thank you. Maybe one day I’ll be able to fix this situation, but i have to be healed first.
Let’s be honest, individuals with BPD are easily slighted and they go to attack. They are emotionally rigid and inflexible. In other words, they can be insufferable and stressful to live with. BPD sometimes seems like a justification for bad behaviors. It should be described as the asshole disorder, because that’s exactly how they act. After 20 years of living with a person like this I’m DONE. My patience and tolerance has run dry.
It’s mainly disabling for people around the person with the disorder. Most of the time these individuals lack the ability to self-reflect and take accountability for their actions. People who encourage others to be patient and supportive of someone who repeatedly treats others like crap probably haven’t lived with someone with BPD. Call it a disorder and blame it on trauma, but that doesn’t make their behaviors any less hurtful and destructive. I don’t agree that people with BPD can tune into other people’s emotions - that makes zero sense. Someone who doesn’t understand their own emotions isn’t going to read others accurately. This is partly why they overreact to others. It’s a very strange claim to make since it’s completely inaccurate.
They are definitely HIGHLY in tune into others emotions. They use that skill set to manipulate, retaliate for “perceived” transgressions and to do damage control.
I have lived with a person with borderline personality for over 20 years and it’s been hell on earth. Sometimes I wonder if we are simply labeling a manipulative, angry and narcissistic individual with a disorder? After years of being patient and tolerant of their abusive behaviors I have a very hard time feeling ANY kind of empathy for them. The relationship has ruined my life and our family. Encouraging people to support someone who often treats others like crap and lacks the ability to take ownership is a lot to ask.
BPD can be officially diagnosed before age 18. I was officially diagnosed at age 16 in a hospital, and many others I know have been diagnosed even younger. It's the one exception in the DSM-5. The information in this video is outdated and stigmatizing.
There are just too many inaccuracies in this video.
Please someone answer me that how can I deal with my son that has BPD and before I suffered with my ex and my sister in law for many many years and I’m so tired and sick!!💔
The people I know that are narcissist are very successful.
I used to nanny for a teenager who had RAD, ADHD, learning difficulties, FASD and ASPD, probably ODD. She had been abused and then she was adopted and I worked for her adopted family. I was close to the family and I'd known her since she'd been adopted into the family, so I watched her go from a toddler into an adult. In my time spent with her, I rarely experienced her 'bad' behaviours. She liked me because I was adopted too and for some reason still unknown to me she was always brilliant in my care and I really enjoyed caring for her. However, outside of that, she stabbed her teaches, assaulted other kids, teens or adults, she would run away and legitimately go insane distance and end up in the most crazy dangerous situations, the police were at the house almost every night. As she entered adulthood she spent a short time living in the community but due to her behaviour that became immediately unsafe. She was dangerously promiscuous (I mean that as literally and as clinically as possible), she threatened local gangs and ended up with threats on her life, she best up random people and got beat up, and throughout all of this, she did not ever understand what she was doing wrong. She did not have any remorse, ever because her brain was not at all wired to have it. She didn't understand danger or consequence. She was known to all local police stations and ended up being put out of each area she lived in. Her behaviour became so violent and unmanageable that her family had to send her to live in a residential psychiatric hospital, where she is medicated and kept safe from herself and everyone else. The family were never given support and during her childhood the schools had no idea how to deal with her. I believe if those 2 things were different back then, in childhood, that things could have ended up better, as ASPD or the precursing symptoms are certainly aggravated by the further social trauma or negativity experienced by the person. There are ways to intervene and at least steer a child or teenager in a more productive direction regardless of the disorder. I think past childhood there's very little that can be done to help those with Aspd, unless they present and ask for help themselves, which Is going to be a rare occurrence as they don't necessarily see themselves as being disordered.
Dear All, I need some help. I have been diagnosed with BPD 4 months ago and started on therapy. I live in the UK but my partner needs help. I was wondering if there was a support group for partners of those with BPD. She needs someone she can talk to, who can understand and help explain or make sense of our situation. Does anyone know of anybody who offers this service?
❤❤❤
This is an unfortunately misguided and poor representation of the disorder. It adds to stigma. NPD is a debilitating condition, but people can get better. The key things that people with NPD need are empathy and compassion. I am not finding either of these in this presentation.
Did anyone call you a narcissist. Because that is what has happened to me.
You’ve been gaslighted to the point of psychological murder… if you’ve turned into “them”, at any point, it was reactive abuse and it was only to defend yourself. I’m convinced this disorder is caused primarily by the environment (the people around you).
Part of the language issue shows up as triangulation. They can’t talk directly. They stalk like a predator.
My wife, well the person i thought i married over 19+ years ago, has over the years started to become mean and showing hatred for me, 3 months ago I was tired of it and through with it so I asked her for divorce and seriously told her that I meant it this time, I've asked that we go see a couples therapy and she would stone wall me like she always done. I started to find letters adrenal entries net worth from multiple years but there was some that were addressed to me but never given to me written in Spanish which I do not fully read and in these journal entries it was nothing but talking bad about me has she talked about regretting marry me and that how she was not in love and going to leave me because she wasn't happy, but she never talked to me about these feelings and hid them from me in fact those years that she wrote them I don't remember her being unhappy I could tell something was wrong but she led me to believe everything I have family photos that would say otherwise but then these letters stated different I've been gaslighting in the thinking times are good when they went for her but yet she stayed with me for these 19 plus years so I remember storing some stuff in our shed that was some of mine and some of hers I remember she placed in these journals that I know she had but never never had a need to because they were her private belongings, but curiosity has got the best of me and I acquire them before she had me arrested on falls Church of domestic battery what she said I had pulled her hair and she got a restraining order on me and no contact I was deeply saddened by everything she had did without remorse, i read a little better Spanish then before and as i began to read them, one dated 2 months before we married, she talked about how depressed she was and where her life was going and that she had to believe in God and keep good thoughts in her head to better her future she talked to her she could not trust or confide in anybody because no one valued the thought she had in her head and that people just weren't trustworthy and because she was a trustworthy person she was taking advantage of and never trusted nobody even men because of her experience men always say there's something that they're not and they are just unworthy and it can't be trusted and then when I met her she thought I was the Prince charming Knight on a white horse to save her from all of this horrible world she was living in and I did love her as she did me we got married and moved from Mexico to Houston and everything was going good I thought it was a little hard in the beginning but got better a year later she got pregnant with my first kid and when I would come home I noticed that she was feeling sad I had asked her what was the matter she was saying nothing and then she started crying telling me I'm sorry I'm sorry and I asked her what are you telling me you're sorry for, I knew she missed her family and because we didn't have no other family around us and he used in I know she was alone when I was at work and I work by the job so I would always come home at the same time I would buy her calling cards so she can call her mother during the day back in 2004 we didn't have cell phones or I didn't at least and we didn't have a landline at the house but the apartments we lived in had to pay phone right by the laundromat but when she was pregnant about 3 months before she having the baby I talked to my dad who is here in California and he was talking about how he needed someone help you know and since we were in the same tradeand she had family over here in California I made the decision to move us to California from Houston so she can have family to be around that could visit her or she could visit in those journals she talked about how she loved me and that I was a prince charming and that she was kind of afraid about how things were going to go and she had to keep good thoughts in your head and not disappoint me and how much she missed your parents and you wish you could go back and wasn't too sure if she was going to be happy being married to me and that 3 months when we got married after we got she started talking about how disappointed she wasn't me and that I wasn't doing enough and I need to find a different job to make more money and just talking about all these things that was nothing but downplaying me and now she was wanting to leave me to go back home because she regretted marry me but yet these things she you never told me she kept them to herself and made me believe everything was good and she was happy and had two more kids with me not only was my heart broken when she had me arrested about false claims of pulling your hair and getting restraining order on me to where I cannot be around my family no more it broke my heart even more reading all these things and started beginning to realize all the things in the past that happened but it was all really about find me the prices of divorcing her and that is even more heart-wrenching than anything I'm thinking about presenting these papers to have her mentally evaluating and I'm thinking of not doing it I don't know what I should do I know that discharge of domestic batteryis not true in falsified by her which prevents me from getting anything out of the divorce including having custody of my kids I have been at home or stay at home dad for the last child who is 2 years old since he was born and and stop working so she could work and she has been the breadwinner since 2016 I still do side jobs every once in awhile but she is the primary breadwinner and I was proud of her and she took advantage of that and doesn't care nothing about me not having a place to go or not having a job because I stayed home taking care of our kids sleeping in my car and it's cold winter nights and because of the season no one is hiring for work she has no remorse and doesn't care,
My arms are open 😁
I poured my heart and soul into a man with bpd only to be told he thought I was an agent of the devil out to get him and that I was the cause for his illness. I was shattered and devastated. I went above and beyond for him. What a kick in the teeth. If I was ever upset there was zero concern for me. He got so wrapped up in his own emotions because he assumed I must be upset because of him and must therefore be blaming him in my head. Zero compassion, empathy or support shown to me. Fully self absorbed in his own intense feelings. He said he feared abandonment, but the only one being emotionally abandoned was me. I really loved him. 😢
Excellent presentation. Well explained. Clear with concise accurate data points. BPD is a curse of an illness and the people who suffer from it deserve help and healing. They , like everybody, have intrinsic human value and merit peace and comfort in their lives.
Thank you I have bpd znd other multiple conditions
Psihopatice, ja sam oduševljena vašim mozgovima. Ako je glavna šifra granični poremećaj ličnosti onda zaista vas treba proučavati i posmatrati. Kako bolesni mozgovi klinički manipuliše te i patološki lažete plus UŽIVANJE u zlostavljanju proganjanju ljudi do smrti i za to krivite druge. Vaši mozgovi koje god dijagnoze da su tu sa vašom visokom inteligencijom i tim ludilom su savršeni spoj za manipulusanje normalnim, ali naivnima kao što sam ja.
I'm currently taking my casac and I just wanted to say I really enjoyed ur seminar, thank you very much.
30:38 I heard about a study done on monks that showed that they have a very similar reaction to this type of countdown to stimulus. Pretty interesting to see how some aspects of "enlightened" individuals have parallels to certain pathologies. It's like they can decide when to use the prefrontal cortex when necessary. Brain scans of monks are so interesting.
That's a fascinating parallel! It's my understanding that meditation affects the pre-frontal cortex.
People with NPD can actually be very successful but you often have to look at how they became that way to get the full picture. A lot of manipulation, purposeful actions in certain dynamics, and drive towards being better than everyone else to feed their narcissism.
I always wanted someone to love me like i do them. Or put as much energy into me as i do them. But now i see that they literally cant do that. We invest our all into people which is not normal i guess. Wish it was though. I just dont know how to get rid of that resentment and intense anger that comes from the thought of my man not investing himself in me like i think he should. Constantly paranoid, stressed that hes going to find someone better or with more to offer and trash me. Its so exhausting and i know its irrational. But my brain sure thinks its an immanent threat. And im sabatoging tf out of my relationship and pushing him away to gaurd myself from this "inevitable" threat. My brain tells me its a sure thing that hes going to cheat or abandon me and i know he wouldnt. Constant battle between my fked up brain and reason. I'm exhausted
Thanks for the video