Hello and welcome to my lifestyle Channel, my name is Bemi, I’m a Gospel Girl who likes to discuss and share my opinion on all things Motherhood and Life in general, I also like to make video tags and challenges cause i think its fun and i'm all about enjoying what you do.
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Twitter: @BemiBadmus
Instagram: @bemibadmus
And Send me an Email: [email protected]
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Friends like this are not people you should be afraid to offend. You frankly dont need them in your life at all because anyone who can eatch you and your kids be greatly inconvenienced and not try to be helpful, will also not help you in the future even if they are doing very well. Whether now or later, you don't need them in your life.
You are a nice woman
They have over tried bye bye to him immediately
EIYAH PELE ooo my dear. Welcome on board oo❤❤❤
Mama stay strong 🤗🤗 Tishe stress mummy less oo😊😊
Awwwn new people found mama channel 🥰🥰 I have missed a lot oo, Exam you do this one oo😂😂 Princess Tishe the baker 🤭🤭
A house guest who is working should contribute to bills and grocery costs, they should also do some chores - that is the barest minimum they could do! My friends have housed me in the past and vice-versa, this is what we do for each other, we take care of each other. No one leeches off anyone, we all help each other along while respecting each other's kindness and hospitality. I currently have an extended family member who asked to move into my house but I am scared to say yes, knowing family can be so insensitive and entitled and I do not want to become uncomfortable in my own home so I will most likely say no. To my friends, I will not think twice to say yes because we have known, love, mutually respect each other and do not at all take advantage. My advice to anyone who wants to take in a house guest whom they aren't so sure of their character is that they should have a conversation stating expectations, responsibilities and boundaries before the house guest arrives. Time limit for the stay would also be stated and strictly adhered to. If the guest fails to adhere to the stated terms, then they should be asked to leave.
Bemi, God bless you for this insightful episode. I came in Sept, 2023 through International Student route and I only got a job shifts job in security not until April , 2024. This Canada Japa project is not for faint-hearted, you’re very honest in all aspects 🙌👍🌹
I believe the key is for both parties to agree on how long he would be staying even from the start. Always ask the duration but in love and wisdom. That way, when the day to leave is approaching, they will know and put more work in getting their own place. Also, when you leave with someone, if it's in your capability, you need to contribute no matter how small.
My brother in-law was sent America by his blood uncle, but he's paying part of their mortgage for the room he's occupying, for food, for bills and even his uncle's car insurance since he's being driving it to work,
He's probably putting up property back home t their expense, and will rub it in their face later
Thanks for sharing. I have my own fair share of this. We stay in a two bedroom flat , we accommodated a relative for 18 months + no contribution to think that we a family of four were all staying in one room while the person had an entire room if we didn’t have the conversation I wonder how long it’d have been
Avoiding letting a relative come stay with me just for this reason because from my personal life experience, family members are the most entitled, ungrateful, unkind and insensitive. Discussed with my older sibling who agrees said relative should find their own way and I stay on my lane, to avoid potential issues in the future. If your house guest had a job, it is cruel and insensitive of them not to have contributed to your household bills. A friend had me visit for a few days recently, before we bought travelled abroad on holiday. She is the most generous and selfless host but the least I could do to show gratitude was buy the children little presents as well as pay for a mini grocery shopping trip we took to the supermarket. My girl and her husband will want me to have food in my mouth every minute while I'm at theirs, they cook and it's "K eat ooo, have you eaten?, eat now". But I try and eat like someone with sense and home training. I don't eat them dry. I would also go out and buy bread, fruits their children like and other treats. If they complain that I'm spending money while staying with them as a guest, I will argue that I bought stuff for the children and I to enjoy, and it's none of their business. I do these things to show my love and appreciation for their friendship and generosity. If I was an ungrateful weirdo, they would not be comfortable with me using theirs for as my base for a week annually, when I travel up to their neck of the woods to visit them as well as see other mutual friends who live in that part of the country. I do unto others what I would have done to me.
@@Rebel_Leader7 thank you for your detail3: response. The person worked but never bought even a lollipop for the kids not to talk of bread but ate minimum twice a day. Funny enough after we asked this person to leave politely, anytime they’d visit and let’s say I cooked , person would only wash their dish and leave the rest in the sink At one point he picked and chose when to work because he had no bills at home or it’s too cold outside
@@annan4368 I am sorry you had to deal with such insensitivity from someone you went over and above to accommodate. My prayer is that you will experience real human kindness in this world, there are genuinely lovely people out there and you will get to meet there. Also, thank you for your selfless sacrifice.
The person in my house now is the last person because last last, the person who accommodates another person will become the bad one
It makes to come to Canada is you have money. Canada is expensive. Canada is expensive!
You are absolutely correct. IT IS NOT POSSIBLE TO SCHOOL, WORK AND PAY YOUR FEES! all those saying you can are all lieing. Even the issue of coming with your spouse, i like the fact that you said the spouse may not get a job within the next 5-6 months and you have to pay during this period. Even when your spouse gets the job, how much can your spouse save with an 16-19cad job to pay school fees of about 18k? Canada is good, but.. there are so many but now..
Hello Bemi, I came across your channel some days ago and watched some of your videos. Well, you are such a realist. Its obvious there's no faking it here. I'm glad there are still people who say the truth. Much love from Nigeria. I will keep rooting for you and would love to be part of your KZread family. Tishe has cute gap tooth, like me though 😂
The guy overstayed his visit and should leave, no long talk needed
He's a leech and he's trying to use them to save money. He'll go from their own home to a mortgage! Nothing wrong with that but you need to let your hosts know what your intention is. That way they can decide whether or not they can tolerate that amount of time.
As for those who speak negatively. I have come to realise it's because of what they are going thru so I don't take it personal. I just un-hear what they have to say. lol. I also try not to harbour negative judgement about them by telling myself their situation must b negative for them to feel that way. I also feel as humans we should work on our hearts especially when we realise we are becoming negative, angry, bitter. Lastly they should give him 1 month to move out. Housing someone who is working for 6 months is more than gracious especially at the expense of your kids they don't need to make it a year.
My question is when he was leaving Nigeria where was he thinking he will sleep and eat at. How can you have a job. You see your friend is d only one working for a family of 6. The kids gave up their room for u. And you don't drop a dime. Please 30/50 pounds is too small. The least you should drop in that situation is cad/gbp 100 monthly. Anyways one thing I have realised about life is that some people are takers. They will take and take from u until u have nothing left. In his mind the family is ok making the sacrifice for him so it doesn't concern him to give back in any way. He is only thinking of what he can benefit. Not what the other person is giving up for him to benefit and a lot of Nigerians are like that.
At this stage, the guy has to leave their house. Haba!! He doesn’t have common sense to assist the family financially. Let him go and rent a room or basement and pay for bills to see how it feels.
Listening to this again (read it on mum confession) and I'm laughing cause people are mad. And some pple were saying she should bear it in d comments on mumconfessions. Human beings have no shame sha. How are u comfortable depending on a one income family of 6 for 6 months. Would post a second comment again after you analyse it.
Hi Bemi, I must say I appreciate your insight the information shared is much appreciated, most importantly you Sid "let the lord lead you" very very important, may the lord bless you and your family continuously.
I thought about that o. How dem dey knack 😂😂😂🫣. You are spot on. I love your advice. Na so e suppose be. We must always pay it forward and its more blessed to give than to receive
I think people just always avoid hard conversations and I get it(cos when it have to do with me directly, I don’t even bother having hard conversations, but when it involves others, especially “underdogs”, I Dey carry the matter for head), but when a situation is so inconveniencing for the family as stated, then a firm conversation still needs to be had, which one is “he’s been told and still not doing🙄”, Abi is my ears paining me?. 6, SIX, month rent free , ha!. It’s not even as if they had a guest room ohh, it’s the children’s room they had to vacate for the guest, haba, you don’t need to be nice to even have emotional intelligence, even if you feel your friend owes you help!. I agree with your suggestion at the end of the video, but 1month is fine to be said, instead of 3months. I believe when he realizes how much he would be spending for rent , he would by himself ask for how he can contribute to the house until he can finally stand on his own. I don’t know the sexes of the children, the guest could have even asked the parent to allow the same-sex kids with him sleep in the same room, so the parents room won’t be too packed, then again Parents would wanna protect their kids mbok , make we no hear stories that touch 😅. Pls let’s just have sence. Finally about the negativity part of people, in relation to the job example you stated, I was just laughing. If I had listened to some people’s remark, I would have short charged myself when I relocated and started looking for Job in another career field sef, nevertheless I overlooked the average African pay being said to me, and stood on the pay range I would accept and then I got it about 1month+ after I actually started actively job searching. We gat know our value and stand on it, during job interviews be firm and direct, my country or continent doesn’t define me! Lemme stop here mbok😅. God help us all 🙌🏽.
200 can’t buy anything very sad
He is a Leech 😂😂😂 6 months is a lot, 2 weeks is enough
6months😮, the woman is trying, if you are planning to host anyone, please let them know for how long you are able to host them, when the time comes, remind them that it’s time to WAKAAA!!! Others be ready for the hustle to find your own place to sleep
I have really enjoyed the blessing of people in this abroad. But again like you said, some people should be avoided, they have bad and fearful opinions/speech. Once I hear them like this, I carry my head and run. Words are powerful don’t speak negatively around me abegggg 😊
Congratulations I'm so Happy for you and your family ❤
Your imitation of some people already here is so “spot on”. It’s really important to surround ourselves with people with positive mindset. Things might not be as smooth as we expect but at the same time, they can be smooth. I would also advise the same thing you advised the Lady. But if it becomes unbearable for the family to host the man they might have to tell him to move out, maybe give him a few week notice
Yes the US is cheaper for EVERYTHING!!! That was my biggest shocker moving here.
I landed Canada as a PR with a job waiting for me in Canada and my POF finished in 2 weeks 😂😂 (for those that will ask how - First and last month rent + deposit in Toronto, basic furniture (bed, home office, couch etc. car bills (drivers license exchange, insurance sign up, Ontario license plates, getting my car to Canada standard cause I drove it from US. Canada has strict requirements),food etc.) wahala for who doesn't have POF. The Lord be with us.
Let me add that even with a good job, it took me a year to recover financially from all my life savings AKA POF being spent on relocating to Canada. Is it worth it? YES! But again to the point of this entire video, plan plan plan and pray!! Let God lead you.
One thing I loathe is when people take advantage of others. They have been kind enough to let this man stay in their home and he can sleep well at night, knowing full well he’s taking advantage of them. He is a “man” so he should therefore at this point be able to fend for himself. I’m sure it’s this type of person that wouldn’t do the same for others. This man is a perfect example of why people sin by not being kind to others. You give them an inch and they take a mile. Thanks for sharing Bemi, I hope this helps the person seeking advice.
I don't house no one in my house. Not for a day. When family members advise us they're coming, we advise them back to get an accommodation before they leave Naija. If they don't put his load at the door, he will continue this behaviour. Give me his number, l will put him in his place.
U seem like a mean person… no matter wat u need to learn to help people…. It doesn’t take anything away from u… u want to put him in his place as wat? Is he staying with u? Abegi
I don’t think she’s mean, people are just terrible, it’s better to stay away and house no one, people should prepare themselves for the abroad, why inconvenience children? I have 2 kids and I have inconvenienced them before by helping a friend that had nowhere to go and my husband told him before he came that I can only help him till Month end, when month end came, my husband reminded him that the kids need their space back, guy was almost going to stay longer than offered 😂
@@sarahnnajiofor4847you do know that “help” varies for diff people. So Accomodation may not be an area of “help” one is willing to provide, but can do other things , and that’s also okay! No need to use the word “mean”!.
It's actually quite selfish to take one's hospitality and throw it back in the host's face. Its actually more blessed to give than to receive. People should grow and learn 😢
People can be so stupid sha, sis you are not harsh ooo.. I talk about this on my channel also, new comers should always consider their host abeg
Abeg, they should ask the man to move out. Didn't he have a plan in place on how to pay back his loans?
The man living with them should be ashamed of himself to lay on a family like that. Like you said no matter how small he should still contribute something. The man of the house should never allow another man to lay on his family like that. They can help him but not in a way that negatively affects their family or become an enabler.
I think they should tell him to try drop some money for food ( for himself)and also try and move out within three months so that the children can have their room back. Because they have really try ooo ❤❤❤
Just Wow 😮Some people are just inconsiderate. 6 whole months & they have 4 kids haaaaa. If he was atleast contributing financially it won’t be so bad. They need to evict that adult working tenant with immediate effect.
That’s one of the things I like my hubby for, he will tell you his mind. Bills abroad chokeeeee
Clear truth. 😊
🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂
This is a very very nice video..❤❤ thank you beautiful mama
You’re so beautiful 🥰
Beautiful analysis you have done. You are absolutely right with every details you have given! Even as someone who came with Work Permit ...it's not been a joke 😂😂
Kindly do a video on how you applied for a visa with a child. Your joy is palpable.. congratulations on your husband’s coming 🎉❤
This is wholesome content!! I really like how you were real and shared real life experiences. It’s good to be optimistic that things will work out but also stay informed that this is what life looks like in Canada. The days of pay schools while working are truly over. Well done Bemi ☺️
Bemi US people are also complaining about their groceries oh. When you were in the US schooling the cost of living crises was not there, right now US grocileries is also expensive. As for the £100 shopping where did the person go becausr £100 CANNOT buy much either. The cost of living crises is killing us all my sister!
Yeah I understand the inflation is everywhere, trust me I get it, but grocery prices in Canada is on a different level, people actually cross border to go shop in the US! If not for delivery prices and delivery time, I for dey order from the US o. The UK person, i don’t know oh! But reposted it on my Instagram stories. Infact I still watched one that spent £75 today and bought lots of turkey, chicken, goat meat, fish, shrimps and I just opened my mouth like how?
Omo if Nigeria my country is a sensible country, what am I looking for gangan🤧. This is so disheartening
See ehn!!! 😂😂