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Well said.
Thank you!
Is there a link to the full "tedtalk" for this ?
Unfortunately not, it was from a Q&A
Beautiful vdo
Never had an issue with interviews telling them what they want to hear for an interview seems to be second nature for me and it works. The other thing is that between 2-5 minutes in an interview the decision will be already made so its really important to start strong in an interview.
Are you going to give AG1 a try?
Last office I couldn’t say no. I left with burn out that I’ve never really come back from. I associated it with unreliable co workers that were young but lazy; unmotivated; and didn’t care about the business. The owners were so hands off they didn’t care either. There was one practitioner that was so incredibly needy; that the admin staff all started looking for other jobs. ( the lazy ones). I was looking as well and not lazy a never say no people pleaser. We all thought she needed two personal assistants along with admins. Never on time; running behind by half hour every day; adding patients in to the end of day ; so we never knew what time we would be off; messaging 45 messages before even getting to work. Then throughout the day non stop. After 4.5 years I went on stress leave when Covid hit. The weight of the business was on my shoulders and I was very open and honest with owners when I turned down the management position for many reasons. Main one being I’m a single mom of 3 and worked two other jobs as well. They pushed me into that role anyway. I stayed friends with two; and 4 years later; they opened their own business and asked me to come work for them. I was excited; but hesitant as I know how needy one is. I did a lot of growing those years I took a break from working as the burnout I had again really was concerning. I hashed out this really unreasonable contract and had very clear conversations as to never wanting to work in a place like the last. They too hated it there and assured me it wouldn’t be anything like the last. I went over all the expectations and explained what if this ; what if that; and I’m not killing myself for any job. They insisted all I had to do was deal with computer and patients. I explained I have no problem helping with laundry if I’m caught up. The patients asked them if they would be bringing me back to work with them which was so nice to hear. So I took it. I thought maybe she will be different having some control over her day; work environment etc as it’s her business now. First day; the needy one starts. By day 5; I’m in tears after she left. Three billing portals were down the week ; she was aware ; which made billing impossible and had me running all day which affected the main part of my job. It’s worse because now I’m doing her laundry and all the practitioners laundry 😳( admins never did laundry in any of these clinics I’ve ever been in the RMT ‘s do )and cleaning; on top of everything else. They expect us to check our work too and message at end of day what we did and what couldn’t be done and remind them of what they need to do . 🤦🏼♀️ I had a pregnant woman almost faint; and trying to answer phones; laundry that had to be dealt with every 15 min; emails; respond to her messaging every 1-3 minutes. It was chaos. Building going on in next door and she’s messaging me to go tell them to stop. Lol She left but I couldn’t leave; I was too busy being her personal assistant and was waiting for patients to come out to explain her billing situation. As my boss was leaving said I should be on top of that billing 🤷🏼♀️ Can’t exactly force benefit companies to have their websites running properly. Most days we have to keep trying and put it through next day or two. She is so high strung and incredibly anxious she projects and will blame and protect herself. I feel she needs to be on top of her job and she’s not. Other owner saw me ( I was there an hour after I was supposed to be off and no I won’t be paid for that hour ) and was so kind and said we don’t want you crying leaving work. She knew it was her business partner and said she’s too needy and I’ve told her admins aren’t your personal assistants. I just felt I wasn’t cut out for this anymore. When actually a boss like that will make you feel that way. I am cut out for the job ; she’s unreasonable. I know her partner talked to her because next work day she didn’t ask for much. Next day after a bit more. We will see if she stops this ridiculousness or I’m not staying. I know many admins in same discipline and they love going to work. It’s not chaos and it’s calm and they aren’t over worked. I don’t care if they are my friends I will leave if this continues as I have had several job offers and know a lot of people.
I say no all the time. One of the ways I do so in a work setting is, "I am not going to be able to get to this done today and/or at this moment, however, I can have this to you by this date. Please let me know if this presents as an issue." OR, If it is a time sensitive issue, "I can handle this for you today, do you mind if we bring in "John- another team member" to assist me with project A to ensure we stay on deadline for this project?"
My cold exposure comes from living in Canada 😂
Lol!
What's your cold exposure routine experience?
对
“People can’t help you if they don’t know what you need” Why would/should they help me first of all?
If you’re on the same team, it’s best to help one another. If that’s not the culture of your team, then you may want to find a new team or be the change.
Any risks or concerns I’m missing? Lemme know!
If you have to give an excuse to say no I would say why do I need an excuse to say no? Are we 5? Thats a proper response to a childish demand
If they find a way to repriortize your excuse then its time to say f you you f and get a new boss
You get to say that because your handle is Bigboss 😂
Would you give it a try? Lemme know!
No thank you to cold bath! 😅
lol!
Nigga I’m going in my 4th year of university. I’m not about to change majors or drop out. Trash advice
On one hand I carried a lot of emotional scars because of my upbringing. I hated also being a walking medal for her. But on the other hand, It did keep me out of bad influences. It instilled discipline in me. It did help me become professionally successful. For my own children, I wont want them to carry scars. I want to support them more on what they are good at and enjoy doing. If they wanna be a rocket scientist fine! If they wanna be a UFC fighter, fine also. I will only ask them to get an education, because that is the only wealth I can give them that will never be stolen.
who is dreaming about working and why?
For some people, it gives them meaning
I’m a low-functioning 41 year-old, homeless and living in my car because of lifelong depression. Hearing about vision boards and metrics is beyond me. I just want to get started in IT so that I have a career to work on and have a roof over my head.
Sorry to hear that. I heard there’s plenty of resources out there for getting your foot into IT. Have you tried informational interviews to learn more about the options available out there?
@@DrJonTam Hi, thanks for replying. I had never heard of informational interviews, and I see you have some videos about them, so I’ll be watching those. I’m not sure about what resources are available for getting my foot in the door of IT, but I suspect you have videos about that too, and I’ll be looking for such resources. I’m only looking into this so late in life because I’m pretty desperate for a change in life. I just wonder if someone with no experience, this old, and with my personal issues, can get into IT. Anyway, I appreciate your reply.
@@OneSingleCheezIt yep, best way to get into an industry is to speak with folks who are already in it AND do the work they recommend. For IT specifically, I’ve seen communities like 100 days of code on X/Twitter and those seem to go quite well for many.
If you get a CDL you could have a job right away, that’s if you’re interested of course. I’m looking into it myself. I say I’m a high functioning depressed person, the office environment does not help me.
I am stuck with in nursing degree where I have to give my all but I just can't it is taking a toll on my mental health.
Don’t neglect self-care! There’s always more degrees and jobs out there but there’s only one YOU.
I face attacks of all kinds, jealousy, hatred, envy, they stab me in the back, they twist my words, they take the worst possible interpretation of anything I say, they speak for me, the bullying, the belittling, the disrespect, they judge me for the most petty things, they misjudge me, they tell me to do the wrong thing and accept no responsibility for their mistakes. I can't succeed in life because others go out of their way to hurt me. I have done nothing to any of these people to deserve that. If I set a boundary, it is seen as offensive or confrontational. They will attack me for it.
If you’ve already escalated to management about it and nothing has been done; get out
@@DrJonTam management says they dont like drama, and they blame me for it, and I get fired, I can't keep a job
@@Nathan-jx6lg sorry to hear that. Don’t give up though - I’m sure there’s a better fit out there for you!
Tiger parenting works. It’s better to work hard during childhood, then get a good job in the future, make a lot of money and then enjoy life.
The question is “at what cost?”
I am completely depressed that I never utilized my degrees.
The degree doesn’t matter, it’s the skill that counts. Build skills.
It's too late, I can't do anything now.
Same situation hard , very hatd
It may be hard, but it’s never too late.
@@DrJonTam It's not possible cuz I have already graduated with a degree I absolutely hate
@@Lazh-_- I graduated with a history degree and now work in gaming research. Don’t let the degree determine your future by building the skills necessary for the career that you want.
Same here...now I can't quit but I have to survive here for 10 more months .......and I'm having backlogs...I'm a active kid but feeling like dumb student ever here.... Feeling very very low
I am waiting for video on matrix's relation to eastern philosophy.
Honestly…. I don’t think I’m going to make it at this point.
Already halfway through this vid, so far he’s just vamping, restating the question, promising the title several ways. Dr. Oxford here clearly padding his vids to maximize his monetization, and he does it using disrespectfully obvious techniques familiar from vids by and for children. If he wants to improve watch time, maybe supply more content, and for god’s sake front load it, please. We are too busy for this bs.
Sorry to disappoint!
Im studying dentistry😢 having to show up everyday and give it my all academically and clinically when i literally have no passion for it has been hell...im fortunate enough to have parents who are paying my tuition. But their most important condition is that once you start something you finish it. So i literally have no way out.
my parents think the same way too. like its the lamest thing i've ever heard ""once you've started something, you must finish it". i am also stuck and i dont want to be like this
i hate everything about dentistry and dropping out is not an option. I tried to fall in love with what im doing but i just can't i hate it. I wish i had a way out.
@@arshiyeaah i can totally understand you, sometimes we just have to accept where we are. younshould try at least once to change what you are studying. i will suggest you to try to talk to your parents about it. and dont forget that where there is a will, there is a way.
I am in the exact same spot . 4th year dental student. Zero passion. I hold this course in total contempt. I was never consulted before bring taken there . I've 3 weeks left to end of year exams and I feel I've lost myself. If i tell them i want to change courses , i risk not only being deserted but also being kicked out of the house . Ive already made clear my stance on this course years before. Psychological coercion, manipulation were used in full force against me. I have no one but ALLAH now
Going back to school for engineering in this summer.
I’m tying the same ❤
Too many people are going to school when they shouldn't be. What a lie college education is. We need more tradesmen and entrepreneurs not MBAs.
bruh im doing a degree in civil engineering and im trying to kick off a career of producing beats at the same time, i do not give a flying fuck about civil engineering, should i stay in school so I can use school as a plan B or should i drop out.
Every situation is different, but generally speaking, I’m of the school of thought that you should stick with the safe path for now, but work super hard on your dream until it takes off
I am stuck in the midst of a comp sci degree and i actually hate it ! i have no passion for this what so ever and it’s hard to even get through the classes. But i have nothing else to cling onto 😭😭😭
I’m in the exact same situation, parents made me go into it, and I’m just realizing I hate it
no wayy,, it was my dream to major in computer science. what do you hate in this degree btw?
Switched to a uni and I hoped it would be better. It isn't. It's sucks. DONT GO TO UNIVERSITY LEIPZIG
who ever works is a slave 😌 when you know that it's difficult to do jobs, my heart lingers to businesses.
Great video guys!
I enjoyed your video. It is super helpful and motivating
Currently stuck in a university and degree i never wanted to do. Dropping out isnt an option😢
I'm in the same situation, I cant quit :/
Same .....I feel like a she'll and always stressed to death by this situation
Same situation sometimes it gets very hard
Depending on your level within the org, asking boss to reprioritize for you does not bode well. Instead, take the initiative to reprioritize for them with supporting rationale, and then present. At that point it makes it a bit easier for the manager to agree and also demonstrates your proactiveness. A win win.
Dr. Tam, I find myself to be highly agreeable and in situations where I have been forced to discipline and be tough and disagreeable as a manager figure, it always feels repulsive to me. Any advice on how to gradually alter my mindset so I can more effectively be disagreeable when I need to? Or will it always clash with my innate personality?
Been in university since I was 18 I’m 25 now and still haven’t gotten my bachelors smh 🤦🏾♂️
I entered uni at 17, engineering physics, but depression fucked it all, pandemic made it worse, then I recently changed to economics (which I thought I'd like more) and I think I enjoyed engpys more... I'm 25 now, have just started my first internship ever, Im also not enjoying it. So yeah, I'm also stuck in uni, I just want it to end so I can move on with my life, but I dont enjoy anything yet
haiyaaa i watch video and see comments say this video is as good as jamie olivers rice cooking
D video confused me more🤷🏻♀️😢
im studying computer programming and i never have an interest about it, my grades are failing, iwanna shift to fine arts but there is no fine art in my university , but there is a drafting course , should i shift to drafting?
Motivation transfers to public approval or another audience!
Please help me is there any way i can contact you to get guidance...I dont have time left, my country works differently. Please help me.
Nice analysis. I would just like to challenge one thing. Cleo was a honeypot planted by the Soviets- not a true potential relationship.
A very good video with tons of good advise. Thank you ❤
I have no decent skills, I got divorced in University and missed my degree of a Human Environment Specialist by one 3 credits. I ened up depress and lost my support and just done odd jobs that amount to nothing, basically working for nothing. Have no car can't even afford a driver's license at $600 plus for it here in Quebec. I live in a place where they HATE anglophones and the laws prevent us from working. What I have done is learned some new skills like bike machines but they only hire 14 year olds or people with 25 years experience. The most stuck up industry of all. I was a cookm but have no passion for it, it physically ills me. I am a service person but my back isn't the best, same with yardcare and gardening, I do it but it takes my down after a long day that I can not keep that up. Plus I have no passions for any of those things really, bikes a bit but no one hires my even for that. What does a person do?
Sorry to hear this. What do you want out of your situation?
@@DrJonTam I have no dreams anymore. I just want my own place and a career that I can do. Fact is Montreal is a very bad city and the people here do not get along with me. Anglophones are proper second class citizens here. Not one job I can do here except physical labour and maybe cooking. I can not even get people to rent a cheep room to me. I just want a normal life, nothing special.
@@XxxXxx-fm3wo Having just left Canada, I understand where you're coming from. What's stopping you from leaving Montreal?
I m 41 with jobless, I lost job at 40 and Now stuck, I tried to change the career into devops but for me decision got wrong, as some company are not hiring more the six months gap. It made me loss of hope. I am stuck and helpless, what career should i choose now i m confuse and scared. I need a job
Sometimes it’s not you and it’s the economy. What can you do in the meantime?
Hello sir....want to know about phd in microbiology.