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@randomdudeontheinternet6295

6 жыл бұрын

Jared Dines respond me pleeaaaaaase c:

@ltgreatsocks1

6 жыл бұрын

Jared, don't respond to that guy. But for real, the mastodon joke was fucking great.

@nicholaswhyte9442

6 жыл бұрын

have the roast competition ended....

@sceasar30

6 жыл бұрын

Jared Dines god u are sad. You steal a stolen video idea from PewDiePie.

@maxgreene3962

6 жыл бұрын

Jared Dines Check 16:00 and up. I think i posted this on your FB. It's got some coo edge triplet work. I got a few Iron Maiden style riffs

Know what I use to sweeten my coffee? Meshuggah

@ahuman9113

4 жыл бұрын

Underratedd

@zerocide2281

3 жыл бұрын

HA

"Thigh art is murder" is actually pretty clever haha

@uwu9272

Жыл бұрын

can someone please explain? I didn't get this one

@Emil_Stoltz

Жыл бұрын

​@@uwu9272 Thy Art Is Murder is an Aussie Deathcore Band

@uwu9272

Жыл бұрын

@@Emil_Stoltz ah i haven't listened to em, I'll check em out

@Emil_Stoltz

Жыл бұрын

@@uwu9272 They're amazing. I highly recommend their songs Holy War and Make America Hate Again

@uwu9272

Жыл бұрын

@@Emil_Stoltz thank you for the recommendation

Tony was really getting some mileage out of those necrophilia jokes...

@jshooa4840

4 жыл бұрын

720 likes and *now* 1 comment

@TheSchoolofJack

2 жыл бұрын

832 and two comments

@ZaraelShade

2 жыл бұрын

841 and three comments

I had a friend who ran a pet store in his pub. They called him Master of pub pets.

@Luaporleafcutterant

6 жыл бұрын

Greg Jonson You should have used other synonyms for pet and pub in the first sentence. That way you don't give away the answer.

@ChaosToRule

5 жыл бұрын

Can you give an example for non native English speakers?

@norgepalm7315

5 жыл бұрын

@@ChaosToRule critters and bar

@ChaosToRule

5 жыл бұрын

@@norgepalm7315 You must be murican then. A pub is the place you go to and when you are in the pub you go up to the bar to buy drinks.

@semanticsamuel936

5 жыл бұрын

@@ChaosToRule You could use 'inn' instead. That's more European, though 'in his inn' sounds a bit silly.

Iron...made-in...China...😁😂😁😂😁😁😂😁😂😁😂😁

@SeaTheLion

6 жыл бұрын

Definitely the best one

@thefreelancer9819

3 жыл бұрын

Maiden is just an anagram for Made-In

Who wrote the jingle for Planned Parenthood's new commercial? Infant Annihilator.

@Shadow0fd3ath24

6 жыл бұрын

jesus lmao

@MotivGuy94

6 жыл бұрын

Fucking hell 😂 thats dark

@ToxicChaos115

6 жыл бұрын

Brutal 😂☠️

@cheshirecynic4524

6 жыл бұрын

I was hoping you'd say "Aborted."

@kungfuman82

6 жыл бұрын

Drew P. Weiner Ah fuck, that would've been better.

The pearl jam one caught me off guard

@PlasmidJunkie

5 жыл бұрын

I didn't get it

@zeoalexo

5 жыл бұрын

@@PlasmidJunkie bust a nut=ejaculation

@andrewitzla

4 жыл бұрын

And the Upon a Burning Body

How is this desk like Suicide Silences Career? It goes up when Jared pushes it

@hadleymanmusic

6 жыл бұрын

alias_me now thats funny

@zackovalltrades760

5 жыл бұрын

It's true

God these jokes are terrible I LIKE IT

@haideus5226

6 жыл бұрын

Love this shit

@guts2657

6 жыл бұрын

The Job For A Cowboy one got me

@haideus5226

6 жыл бұрын

Upon A Burning Body fuckn got me XDDD

@captainghost7043

6 жыл бұрын

dude I laughed with this comment more than the video hahaha

@stormbridge

6 жыл бұрын

Mr. Metalhorse same here

"Why's this desk like suicide silence's career?" It's not metal

@jesperpsv98

6 жыл бұрын

Slime Lord Senju OH SHIT

@CR3ATIVEx

6 жыл бұрын

Good one

@kaismith7004

6 жыл бұрын

Slime Lord Senju shots fired

@menotyou1531

6 жыл бұрын

Cleverrr

@filipdzero8739

5 жыл бұрын

It's flat...

What's up with Tony and necrophilia jokes, do we need to be concerned 😂

Thigh art is murder thank you

Djared Djines

"Yeah these are not from the internet" Subtitles: "Yeah these aren't funny at all" ... I see what you did there lol

@charliewhelan9488

6 жыл бұрын

Mihail Georgescu I was looking for someone else who saw this!

@MihailGeorgescu

6 жыл бұрын

Yeah, and that's probably the best joke in the whole video

@charliewhelan9488

6 жыл бұрын

Mihail Georgescu true that

@lucaswm2

6 жыл бұрын

lmao

@jay8819

6 жыл бұрын

Charlie Whelan only everyone who watched it

The After the Burial joke killed me

@schalke9974

5 жыл бұрын

The upon a burning body killed was the one to get me

What do new parents get when they forget to change their baby's diaper? A Cradle of Filth....

@jaygopinath1694

Жыл бұрын

🎉🎉🎉😊

"What do you call someone who eats ass?" "Gross" LOL

@astroboycum3982

6 жыл бұрын

I got more bang then Kurt Cobain's brain! Uhhh

@kurtcobain3426

6 жыл бұрын

Noose Dog *than

@JMetalGuitarist

6 жыл бұрын

I was gonna make a gay joke, butt fuck it.

6:31 how did Jared get two points? Cheeeaaater!

@TheLastArchive

6 жыл бұрын

He laughed at 10 points but it didn't add on to the score

@MrPs103

6 жыл бұрын

Meh, he lost anyway :)

@nikke5686

6 жыл бұрын

Because tony laughed before he told the joke completely

Iron made-in China killed me

Thigh art is murder. the best fucking joke in the video

skrattar du, Ffff...oh wrong channel

@lunchbucket2494

6 жыл бұрын

Lol

@alevidal897

6 жыл бұрын

NICO NICO NIIIIII

@satricon

6 жыл бұрын

haha!

0:33 "yeah these are not funny at all" hahahah

@adhouston99

6 жыл бұрын

But Tony actually says "Yeah, these are not from the internet"

I love how they both laughed at the first joke.

"What's a metalheads favorite vegetable?.......Korn" That joke is so good and yet so....korny

@absolutebob8212

6 жыл бұрын

It would've been the worst if instead of Korn, he had said Jason Becker. #imgoingtohell

@boseifrit5480

5 жыл бұрын

Leave

Skrattar du?... *FÖRLORAR DU*

@DaishinZlrex

6 жыл бұрын

Mathias Sjodin maneeeeeee

@nebelutz2954

6 жыл бұрын

Manneeeeeeeen

@bartoszbartosiewicz1123

6 жыл бұрын

Did you laugh? Or did you lose?

@erlandjohansen7195

6 жыл бұрын

Høres liksom ikke like bra ut på svensk

@ToTheGatesofHeaven

6 жыл бұрын

Sisterfister

_What do Jews and metalheads have in common?_ _They both prefer the old _*_Testament_*

@wjsspilsbury

6 жыл бұрын

Old news.

@S6king87

6 жыл бұрын

Should be Jews not Catholics

@severalsedrack

6 жыл бұрын

this was a joke form the last one, and it is also wrong.... Jews prefer the old testament...

@chaelsthumbnailposture3135

6 жыл бұрын

how did this trash comment get 107 likes in an hour

@KeanoMUFC1

6 жыл бұрын

That's pretty accurate, Catholics are for the old Testament too, they were doing crusades and other violent stuff, which Jesus is not approving

What do you call a priest scuba diving? Holy Diver What is faster than a laser bullet? Painkiller

Pearl Jam

Guess we'll call you *DjentDiePie*

Thigh art is murder. Beautiful

"what do you call somebody who eats ass?" I laughed before the punchline XD

I was thinking limp biscuit when they said the shitty rapper and metal band joke.

@yvesheinrich5013

6 жыл бұрын

DEMON HUNTER!!!

@mathewgonzalez1214

6 жыл бұрын

Yves Heinrich I AM SOMEONE TO HATE!!!!

@robinandersen8

6 жыл бұрын

Yeah, same

@yvesheinrich5013

6 жыл бұрын

+Mathew Gonzalez Argh!!! The Gauntlet!

@wtfisthat13

6 жыл бұрын

No shit. Thought the same

Keep it up with the do not laugh challenges they are really funny

“What do you call Jeffrey Dahmer after he buys a metal zone?” “Cannibal Corpse”

I immediately knew what the answer to the Bruce Dickinson joke was going to be 😂

6:32, Jared you cheater !

@eduardoteodoro2300

6 жыл бұрын

\m/ why aren't there more comments about this?

IRON MADE-IN CHINA THIS IS THE DANKIEST IRON MAIDEN JOKE I'VE EVER HEARD

Thigh art is murder!!

What do Super models do when they get tired but still have to continue the photo shoot? Rest,Repose What does the guitarist for Daddy Rock do when he’s hungry? Jared Dines

Merry Christmas people

@starrk7158

6 жыл бұрын

Merry Christmas.

djokes

2:18 starts the greatest joke of slayer

The "Upon A Burning Body" joke has got to be the absolute darkest one I've heard out of all these.

Did you laugh or did you lose? Skrattar duuuu?

@TheHXCgrandma

6 жыл бұрын

Forlorar duuuu

@n.a.r4959

6 жыл бұрын

zeJaRe MANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

The mastodon one got me

when he talked about a metal band and a rapper I legit thought he was gonna say "now we have Body Count"

We need more of these I'm crying right now!

Fantastic! People looking at me like crazy now cause im on the train laughing. The smell of beer is not helping me look better either but thank you guys! Regards from Sweden

Metal Pewdiepie!!!

The part where Jared praises the desk is the best part of the video

I´m from Spain and I usually get mostly of your speech, but the subtittles are such a great detail for these types of videos. Gran vídeo, mejores subtítulos. Do more of this stuff, dude

Thigh Art Is Murder, I'm dead

you should make more of these videos. you two are really funny together.

That last one was absolute gold!

5:22 They just laughed together. 😂😂😂😂😂 Jared's laughter make my day!

What is the biggest similarity between my death metal playlist and alone time with my girlfriend? I keep hearing the sound of suffocation

Nice shit man keep it up

@shanem871

6 жыл бұрын

Green Scott G oh yea

Tony's jokes got me.... I haven't laughed that hard in a long, long time

This is solid content. Especially the ending jokes.

Can't Jared just sit in front of his laptop and make fun of the Judas Priest drummer's nose again? :D

@SaintSentry

6 жыл бұрын

*Desideria Prehn* You mean the video that everybody hated and claimed that it wasn't "what we subscribed for"? It's impossible to please you people.

@Sally.C

6 жыл бұрын

SaintSentry People should stop bitching around

@davidnissim589

2 жыл бұрын

@@Sally.C The drummer, Scott, literally left a comment on Jared's Instagram thanking him for making fun of his nose. So people really need to chill now that they know the drummer approves.

what do you call the Westboro baptist church? Whitechapel I'm not sorry...

@andriealinsangao613

5 жыл бұрын

BOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!!!

omg I could had expected from Jared showing his cool table xD

Definitely the best one on the entire internet

Deathcore Dino Dines

You mentioned two sacramento venues in this video “ace of spades” and “holy diver”

hell yes more of this

We needs more of this

Corn is a grain though.

@TheBlackKnight1o1

6 жыл бұрын

yes

@nothighiswear8869

6 жыл бұрын

TheBlackKnight1o1 no

@ReaperKezia

6 жыл бұрын

It's dairy

@TheBlackKnight1o1

6 жыл бұрын

Not High, I swear yes

@nothighiswear8869

6 жыл бұрын

TheBlackKnight1o1 *No*

Jared, you better hope Austin doesn't see this. He'll get pissy about you cheating on him. I can hear him now, "HOW DARE YOU DISRESPECT ME LIKE THIS, TRADING METAL JOKES WITH TONY. PREPOSTEROUS!"

Dude love your content!!!! You got me into drumming and got me more into guitar. Not to mention you're hilarious. Love your channel!! Merry early Christmas!!!!

I can't decide how bad I wanna die after watching this, but I still love this Channel

This video would've made more sense on the Dickeydines show :(

God these jokes are fucking gold i needed that laugh 😂

from 10 to 12 in just one Jared !!

Van Hailing and Winds of Plague got me 😂

"gross" I agree

Iron maid in China

I laughed at almost every single one of these

This series is one of my favorites. Please keep them coming I'm dying over here 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Iron Made-In China won the Internet! :)

Lost it at "thigh art is murder"

“Iron Made-In China.” Lmao 😂

That Pearl Jam joke was my favorite. 😂😂😂

3:26 BUT CAN YOU DO THIS?!

why jared points went up from 10 to 12?

@jshooa4840

4 жыл бұрын

I think Jared edited the video

This was actually great lmao

I laughed way too hard at “Iron Made-In-China”

Does the desk suppot *T A B L E* memes?

@addigill6095

6 жыл бұрын

Carlos Park why'd you leave the keys upon the table!?

@AwayAtKeyboard

6 жыл бұрын

Can it support James Hetfield?

@pinkbadger9

6 жыл бұрын

*T A B L E* memes are the best

@unidentifiablegamer8192

3 жыл бұрын

I AM THE TABLE!

Jared's laugh is the purest thing in the world

That was the most effective sponsorship yet, now I want a desk that goes vroooooo

Metal dad jokes. My life is complete. 🤘🤘

What are the only knots metalheads know how to tie Slipknots

4:07 close your eyes 🙄😁

@anzekos429

6 жыл бұрын

omg 🙄

@gurdittsingh6638

4 жыл бұрын

🤦🏻‍♂️

Love these videos

Iron Maiden joke blew me away :D

You guys finally mentioned the best band in the world(for me)MAIDEN?

@cyclpiancitydweller9517

Жыл бұрын

Maiden forever.

5:54

I laughed in the first two seconds, I don't know why 😂😂😂

These were the best jokes yet hahahahahaha