When The Narcissist Contacts You After No Contact | Pep talk
Жүктеу.....
Пікірлер: 304
@golnazabaee599 Жыл бұрын
We cannot "unsee" what we have seen. Once we are on to them and see them for who they really are, there is no possible way we will want them in any way!! I love that I have almost nearly reached the point of indifference now. I never thought I feel this way.
@roxanne2977
Жыл бұрын
Same here! The Hoovers get easier and easier to ignore because it finally sinks in how much you know better.
@msthang5366
Жыл бұрын
I cannot unsee the fuckery
@matt-df3xc
Жыл бұрын
Well said. I felt the same way. Over time after no contact it became a sense of indifference, not hate, not animosity, but indifference.
@golnazabaee599
Жыл бұрын
@@matt-df3xc yes indifference is the best revenge. they are just another body in the crowd.
@mostHigh23
Жыл бұрын
Yeah it just doesn't matter anymore. Truth be told everything mines 😜 does is predictable. It's just comical at this point.
@xbubbles10x Жыл бұрын
I responded to the the Hoover after 6 months of no contact. Now here I am, back watching videos on narcissism. Listen to anoushka, stay no contact!
@prasadzarkar8679
Жыл бұрын
Went through same. They always come to destroy you for what is left. My worst decision ever to respond to her. Now grey rock no contact till I die.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Oh Alexis I did the same thing after six months. He had screenshots of three months before that trying to get a hold of me and he was texting someone else he had my phone number off by one number. And whoever he was texting never said he had the wrong number. I fell for the Hoover in August and like you I’m back to being devalued silent treatments blocking phone hang ups I thought I was educated watching these videos since last February but I still fell for it. At least now I know what to expect and that each time it would get worse I am definitely holding my ground if he ever comes back
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@prasadzarkar8679 absolutely!!!
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
How did he get you to give in if I may ask? Mine did the typical love bomb promises and I fell for it bc I was away from him for so long I actually was still coming out of the trauma bond
@dustinquinton
Жыл бұрын
It’s really hard. Don’t respond. Ever!!!!
@robertsimmons2025 Жыл бұрын
No. No. No. do NOT fall for the narcissist. Do not let them back in your life. Do not ever forget what they did to you. Because the Damage is already done. And yes they know what they did to you. There’s no excuse for letting them back in your life. Just walk away and let them go. Good luck and may god bless you all.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
And they will only be 100 times worse if you let them back it’s devastating
@scorpiointutivesoul
Жыл бұрын
If it's mother nd brother then how
@shekinahredmond2852
Жыл бұрын
@scorpiointutivesoul its hard when it's your family. My husband and I had to walk away from his family. He struggles daily, but he's doing it. And our life has been filled with peace since going no contact. Your peace will help you with the decision.
@kristahunter1588
Жыл бұрын
I'm going through the same thing my narcissist's friend. I should call her Text me out of the blue nasty Texts. They're very hurtful but I try to ignore it and I try not to read that's a rhythm. It's hard when there's fifteen twenty of them at a time
@lollygallagher8773
Жыл бұрын
@@shekinahredmond2852 It's been 14 yrs for us. Flying monkeys made it difficult but they have had to go too. Believe it, not a thing changes if you go back, the treatment just gets worse. I know this because they sucked us back in 2X. So like I said 14yrs and 2 flying monkeys in a space of 3 weeks just over a month ago.Still after all this time the same script gets used and no will not be a fool just ignore. Keep your peace and wishing you all the very best in this beautiful life being freeXx
@JacK-qn4zh Жыл бұрын
Just seeing their name pop up on phone = OH NO!!!
@EvaArt-ud6gwari Жыл бұрын
This is so helpful as it happened to me but he actually out of nowhere came to my door with flowers wanting to be "friends" and it was a shock. On the card he had written he was sorry he had hurt me! I was flooded with all the old feelings or memories but also disgust, and fear, but I gathered myself quickly and said NO. SUDDENLY and simultaneously I saw how truly ugly he was, and WHAT this really was. He made himself appear miserable and lonely, the old trick, and he is, but I did not fall for it. I am forewarned. Thanks Anoushka.
@bodymindsoul60 Жыл бұрын
They are just throwing out a line to see if You will bite.
@pallasathena1369 Жыл бұрын
Divert them back to the downgrade they cheated on you with .. by ignoring them.
@jason_v12345 Жыл бұрын
I don't see anything wrong with them contacting you because they need "supply." The key thing is that they aren't calling with the intention of providing any to YOU. It's not the neediness that's the problem. It's the lack of mutuality.
@susansheehan7965
Жыл бұрын
So true
@jamesgraves9858
Жыл бұрын
Yes. There is no mutuality. They dictate everything. I should have known when the first time we went out after she said I love you (first) I said it again after the date and she said straight to my face "can we not say I love you all the time." Who says that. I was rattled by that and began thinking about if I should say it on holidays or whatever lol I laugh but I am still struggling getting over that trainwreck
@loriderewitz7213 Жыл бұрын
After all the pain I’ve gone through to repair the damage he did to me, I don’t see myself responding at all. Yes, if he tries to contact me, I will feel very disturbed and lots of old wounds will reopen. But I know now to protect myself and to keep my power. Thank you for all of your help Anoushka and this video has helped make me think about what reaction I would have if he recontacts me. This way I am now prepared. 💕
@jackiegoodwin.3815
Жыл бұрын
These ppl just pretend It All about them No Compassion/ EMPATHY They are most selfish people They contact to be noisy Or try love bomb.. It hard when you're in relationship 😪 Bloody hard, but baby step💞🤝🙏
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@jackiegoodwin.3815 yes ma am I lived that
@jayce2388
Жыл бұрын
Same here
@Skywalker29 Жыл бұрын
I promise you don’t give them anything they’re lying if anyone is reading this they don’t love you like she said they’re talking to several people think wisely it’ll never work. Love yourself keep your power ❤💪🏾
@debbibobetty5620 Жыл бұрын
Every time my ex tries to Hoover me I always answer the text by saying, what's up baby? How you doing baby? I start acting like a player towards them and they get flabbergasted they don't like the shoe being on the other foot. Another one I use is, what's good bro? Lol take control of the reins good luck everyone!
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
That’s funny. Treat them in a careless, dismissive manner.
@kingaberlakovich5585 Жыл бұрын
This are monsters. No heart, no conscience. You can’t see them as real human beings.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Very true
@sleeperno1215 Жыл бұрын
If the victim begins inquiring about the narcissist to others, the narcissist will find out. This is how it works. The narcissist makes contact and then listens for signs of life on social media, through mutual acquaintances, etc. If contacted, do not engage with anyone until you consult a professional. It is really that serious.
@deaddirt1168
Жыл бұрын
Is it really that hard to ignore someone?
@BaggelasTV
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 yeah. Kinda
@deaddirt1168
Жыл бұрын
@@BaggelasTV let me be more specific I'm talking about an ex that didn't live with you. Excuse my blanket statement.
@BaggelasTV
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 yeah. Doesn’t matter. Emotional connection doesn’t mean they have to live with you
@Threepointfive
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 pray you never have to find out
@marykarle3997 Жыл бұрын
Dumped him yesterday…he emailed that he wanted to “keep the door open” and be friends…ha..typical behavior..,I did not respond…I know he’s already posted on facebook seeing what women he can interest into commenting, or get into a conversation…this is his modest operandi!
@tamirobak1717 Жыл бұрын
Very useful. Thank you for this I have renewed courage. You just described my situation to a T. Been living in hell for 30+ years due to narcissism. I have established no contact. He is dead to me. You wouldn’t believe my story. Stay strong out there people. You are worthy of good things ❤
@achiniwijethunga5963
Жыл бұрын
But for me it is difficult to forget him 😢 but I must do it
@ninjamama8784 Жыл бұрын
Went no contact 5 years ago. A little over 3 years ago he sent an email. He left me alone until 2 weeks ago when he cleaned out my checking and savings account. He made made an ACH transfer and the bank was able to stop it and return MY money. I put the money into another account. Now all of my accounts are frozen because he keeps trying to gain access to them. He's been able to change my pins,mailing address and the list goes on.. thankfully the bank is onto him. I flat out refuse to react to anything he is doing. A few years ago I would have had a melt down and ripped him a new one. Now I just patiently wait for justice. I won,he just hasn't gotten the memo.
@silverarrow2558 Жыл бұрын
I went no contact but it took three months before the trauma bond weakened enough for me to be sure I wouldn't respond if I saw her... itsxa tough journey but needs to be done
@Jeff-ng5ig
Жыл бұрын
Usually about 4 years for me.
@cheezinhoweree Жыл бұрын
Just stay no contact.theyre fishing for emotional responses and emotional responses are a way of bonding yourself as one to their dark energy which in turn gets you trauma bonded again
@BCHODOSH01 Жыл бұрын
This information is 100 % absolutely true. It happened to me,and at first i got caught off guard, but after examining what took place i realized that this was another example of her BS. I continued to go no contact and live a better life.
@malangx Жыл бұрын
I remember earlier this year I was supposed to be on course on a Sunday, just about 2 days before the course my ex sent me a text me near midnight "I dreamt of you last night". My only reply was "Thanks". On the day of the course, she was also there and I ignored her the entire day as if she didn't exist and the look on her face was priceless. After so much gaslighting, I was not going to allow myself to get played again by her. Needless to say, after that little stunt of mine, she's never disturbed me since XD
@deepinn3815 Жыл бұрын
It’s been 10 months since no contact. I have seen him twice recently in places I go for lunch, so I now avoid these places. No contact is difficult & requires a lot of mental work. Hard work trying to keep myself in check & stop paranoia taking over. I just want to move forward & keep my peace. I pray he never tries to contact me & I never bump into him. Thanks Anoushka for another informative video 🙏🏻
@marykarle3997 Жыл бұрын
Oh, forgot to add, he remains BLOCKED!
@mikep4472 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for the video. I just left her during another hoover and love bombing attempt by going no contact and completely blocking her from everything. It’s so hard to do. Incredibly hard! This is literally the 7th time I’ve tried to leave her. I’ve never just disappeared on anyone like this ever. It goes against everything I am. However, I know I had to do it. Although I’ll never go back to her I can’t get her out of my mind. I loved that woman sooooo much!!! It’s just hard to believe I fell in love with an illusion. It hurts so much. I am staying strong though but I just wish I could get her out of my head. 🥺😢😢
@SweetMoses365
Жыл бұрын
I’m on day 2 bro. Hang in there. Hardest thing in the world.
@mikep4472
Жыл бұрын
@@SweetMoses365 Thank you! 🙏🏼🙏🏼stay strong and hang in there too. It’s a long emotional roller coaster!! I hope we can all come out better and stronger in the end! I’m sorry you’re going through it too. 🥺🥺🙏🏼🙏🏼 it sucks so bad these people do this to us! 😢😢
@sukoelpiucho
Жыл бұрын
I had a narcisist ex girlfriend. Leaving her was one of the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. There were multiple previous attempts to leave her before, but it only lasted minutes to days and I always got back with her. I just could not stay without her. I really thought I was never gonna make it. I was really suffering. It was so bad at times, how it made me feel being with her, that I just wanted to hurt myself or even end my life. I even went to a rehab place for 28 days, cuz I was such a mess and had lost all the power to go no contact with her. I have almost 2 months now of absolutely 0 no contact at all. I have thought about this person everyday for the last 2 months. When I got out of rehab, where I had no phone or computer access, I was afraid that I was going to try to look here up after I resume my regular life. I have thought about it and wanted to do it, but I have not contacted her because I want to be free AND PEOPLE NEED TO BE FREE. Even if it gets so hard at times, I won't do it, because I don't want to feel as bad as I felt when I was in that relationship. Now I understand that I don't need to get it out of my head, because I now know that it will only come with time. What I do need to know is that no matter what happens or how bad I may feel some days, I know it will never be as bad as when I was with her. I blocked her from everything 2 months ago and if she were to try to contact me in the near future, I won't talk to her. I will just hung up and block whatever number, text or email she tried to contact me from. Stay strong, it doesn't matter if we think about that person all day, or if everything reminds me of that person, what matters is to stay clean/no contact from that person, no matter how we may feel, whatever it is, it will pass. We are now in the pain of growing and not anymore in the pain of suffering...
@mikep4472
Жыл бұрын
@@sukoelpiucho wow thank you for sharing and for your help. I appreciate you and glad you’re healing as well. It is so hard like you say. Also it’s so strange in my mind I wish she would contact me but only for a brief moment then i have to remind myself of all the things she did and then i become anxious if she does try to contact me. I love the last sentence of your reply! Makes so much sense. And yes one step at a time we will just keep pushing forward and i am hoping the day comes sooner than later we are all stronger after all of this passes. I’m sorry you went through this as well. My heart goes out to all that gave everything to these people and we basically got our heart and souls ripped out and stomped on in return. Stay strong too in your journey to recovery i wish you the absolute best and to all the others reading this here. Take care. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
@melaniedubreuil5331
Жыл бұрын
Yeah...illusion...That Hurt so much. Its like theatre decor that fall down. Sorry my english is bad haha
@brianbroussard4433 Жыл бұрын
This ABSOLUTELY happened to me. I did NOT respond in ANY way, shape or form.
@donnacrowe1913
Жыл бұрын
6 months no contact , 2 hoovers I didn't respond....
@brianbroussard4433
Жыл бұрын
@@donnacrowe1913 good job!!!
@jacquelinejacobson678911 ай бұрын
After 7 years no contact/blocking the narc, I suddenly got a pop up Facebook message from him. I said to myself "oh no no!", swiped the circle with that face off my phone WITHOUT reading the message, and re blocked him. The next day after I had done this, I got 3 hang up calls in a row from him. Now THATS the true narc reacting to my rejection!
@Onibocho11 Жыл бұрын
This was a doosey. The person used a fake account using one of my relatives names with no picture. Then sent a message via FB messenger. The lowdown, painful, irony was, my relative had passed away three days prior. I was livid. These people have no limits to their disorder.
@come_on_barbie_123
Жыл бұрын
😯😯😯😯
@kain4695 Жыл бұрын
You have said something like they can't Bonding in a healthy way and detach in a healthy way, and that's why they think the relationship has never really ended its on a pause only in the narsisist mind. And that is the reason why they hoover later.
@marshalldominguez6113 Жыл бұрын
Their actions remind me of the movie "A beautiful mind" where the voices in his mind keep returning to try and sway him again. In the end, he said, " The voices are still there but I ignore them." My x still pokes her head in once in a while. I remind her of her bad choices. Then she goes dark again. Cold water on her. She knows she lost me. It is gratifying.
@scottwwsi Жыл бұрын
a message landed in 'blocked messages'....after over 2 years. a cryptic clip from some song. I'll bet if I called and said something like 'get a clue', it would say something like 'it was a butt call'....yea, a butt went into 'contacts' then tapped the alphabet slider, then called me....but I ain't gonna do that. they are dead to me......I did get triggered though.
@ireneharris4104 Жыл бұрын
He stalked me for 4 mths. Appearing at my house at nite.i kept saying go away. In the end I warned him twice, I will call police for harassing me. It's been 2 weeks n so far he's left alone.
@nessauk2786 Жыл бұрын
I was love bombed in the discard.Probably a tactic to use at a later date to get back in contact if the new supply doesn't work out.
@justsewit_tk5477 Жыл бұрын
I went no contact from mother and stepfather 5 years ago after years of abuse. I'm nearly 47 years old and a mother myself so I have been busy raising my children and being with my family. I have had phone calls and emails all of which I have blocked. They have been insulting and demeaning especially when I haven't responded t them phoning and telling me the grandparents died. My mother attended the funeral of my friend earlier this year just to try and talk to me! I used grey rocking and only said a single word. I have had flying monkeys tell me to go and see my mother because she apparently has been crying on her shoulder telling her she just wants to see me. She doesn't want me! She's never wanted me! She just wants the control!
@flowerpower4944 Жыл бұрын
I left him and I'm so glad ,
@monicae8633 Жыл бұрын
Yes that's completely true. I'm in no contact and I will not let him destroy my process to healing
@MilwaukeeNW Жыл бұрын
Being no contact from the Narcissist is great. I don't care if we never see our daughter-in-law again but, not being able to see our grandson & son is so different than when the Narc is just a former friend.
@shannonbishop77854 ай бұрын
I never have to worry about this. That person will never talk to me again.
@THE-michaelmyers Жыл бұрын
I'm writing this comment at around the 3 min mark of the video. There are honestly only two ways to handle someone that is suffering from NPD during no contact. You get a court order and/or you continue to grey-rock them. I really wish this channel owner would get really deep into this subject of grey rock! Now back to the video!
@sirg-had8821 Жыл бұрын
"Not interested" "Nah, I'm good" I hope I get to use the Katt Williams line: "Your services are no longer required... Dismissed."
@tsunshinegal910211 ай бұрын
~NO CONTACT FOREVER ~ Best remedy ❤
@erynd2524 Жыл бұрын
They can try all they want. They don’t have my new phone number and they’re not allowed in my house or on my social media. I am the one in control and I don’t have to be at their beck and call.
@gloriachapman5618 Жыл бұрын
I changed my phone number. Blocked on all social media accounts when I moved out. He best not ever come to my home because he would surely be gargling with my pepper spray.
@davidallenperriniii7578 Жыл бұрын
These videos are my guiding light these days. Without them I’d be dropping right back into he cycle.
@metatechnologist Жыл бұрын
11:20 "Remember it's a trick" This gave me pause because ultimately the narcissist uses "tricks" or what I call "plays" to again establish control over their target for whatever likely dubious purpose they have. The problem is if it's not dubious you can't really tell that from their past behavior. Correct me if I'm seeing it wrong!
@sleeperno1215
Жыл бұрын
Believe it or not, everything is calculated.
@flowerpower4944 Жыл бұрын
OMG I never want to see him 🤣😂
@tinajones5548 Жыл бұрын
After everything I've learnt about toxic behaviour from you and others, I will ignore and inwardly smile. THANKS 🙏
@ianbrown5868 Жыл бұрын
Im gonna give you the best advise , if they try to reach outnto you dont answer act like you dont see or hear anything act as if you dont know them.and keep moving they think you are stupid and easy .
@lukeskywalker6641 Жыл бұрын
That's why we always emphasize that you need to become unreachable by them. Block, as opposed to just not responding to what they say. What you're about to say, I don't wanna know.
@grayscar05 Жыл бұрын
Narcissists are stupid and overestimate their abilities so embarrassment and looking bad are common and inevitable for them. They won't let go and will keep coming back no matter how many times they're rejected ... especially if you are a highly valued prize or someone they envy. The promise of a narcissistic payout is too tempting to pass up ... getting an prized ex back that left is incredible supply and an unmatched ego stroke
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Ha,ha he is coming after me for 15 years.... I remember how he throw the new supply into my face all happy and proud that he hurt me. Who is laughing now :))) The look on his miserable face was the best karma! 😂🤣😂🤣😂
@shawndreasprolesss Жыл бұрын
All it is supply
@charlizeham1 Жыл бұрын
Thank you I needed this! All too familiar. After 2 years of this nonstop I decided I had enough.
@brendaleverick3655 Жыл бұрын
I look forward to the day when I get interested in someone new.
@captgraybush2890 Жыл бұрын
My narc doesn't want me back until she sees me happy and trying to move forward without her. Then she starts with the calls and the texts. When that doesn't work, she will cause a bunch of drama. She will harass people and use my kids as weapons. She's out of control and refuses to get help.
@TheSpiritRoom23
Жыл бұрын
Mine too which is so weird. But he acts bored when we’re together
@loveself6396 Жыл бұрын
The timing of this . Wow
@melanieleigh7102 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this video. I watch a lot of yours and this particular one really resonated with me. I am currently waiting for my boyfriend (and I use that term loosely) to contact me again after his usual silent treatment which lasts weeks, sometimes months. Currently we're on just over a week of silence (which is a punishment for me speaking my own mind last week). He will probably send me a question mark when he's ready to communicate again.... My struggle is ignoring him and going no contact. I believe I have a trauma bond and I also believe I am head over heels in love with him. I am constantly thinking about him and the sort of response I will give him when the communication finally comes. I am a well adjusted 52 year old who can plainly see what has been happening now for over 2 years. I discovered he was a covert narcissistic from watching these videos!I just can't seem to get out of this loop. My remedy (I thought) was to meet and date as many men as possible to try and move on from him but I cannot seem to feel the same about anyone else. Friends tell me to be strong and ignore him but it's easier said than done. Once again many thanks
@sleeperno1215
Жыл бұрын
Block him on the phone and all social media. Information is their source of supply. Starve him.
@annettebaggett
Жыл бұрын
Don't beat yourself up so for how you feel. . I felt that way for 23 years off and on as he cycled through the other supplies.. There's always other supplies that he sat on the shelf and, kept in contact with to take down and use, to meet his needs. . Now that I know what was happening, and was honest with myself that I deserved better. Even though I am alone now, I have such peace in my life. I spent a lot of time in prayer, and mourned the loss of the illusion of what I thought I had. . It helps to remind yourself of all the bad things he did. Also , when I felt weak, I would watch one of these empowering videos. His actions clearly proved that he didn't love me. He just loved the services I supplied to him. A janitor with benefits. Love yourself more than that. And remember, he doesn't love any of the other women either. They are supply for an empty hole he will never be able to fill. No Matter how many others he cycles through. .. and that's where they go when they're not talking to you. ...
@oceanoftheseamermaidnastia6209
Жыл бұрын
That was my first taught i got super depressed and sad suffered from insomnia from a person i loved and didnt even love me back . False promises future faking the lies the manipulation i was losing it lol i had to get a grip on myself i almost lost myself over a person who didn’t even care about me . Blocking them works DNT answer private calls and stay busy I finally started working out first time in the gym and after feeling better n releasing my pain and stress I learned to love myself and making rigid boundaries and loving myself and invested in my career. Im better off own . I tell myself i dnt want no friends or association with someone who intentionally maliciously hurt me over n over again in good
@michellawarren17154 ай бұрын
No Contact. I agree. Responding to the Narc: after silence,. You are giving the Narc: permission to come back. Be cold. Don't Respond. Let 'em know, that door is shut-boltered-lockdown.
@annettebaggett Жыл бұрын
My husband sent a cowardly text. smh ! if you really cared, wouldn't you call, or show up at my door ? ... however I'm glad he just texted... I never responded. it's over for me !
@NewNameNaomi
Жыл бұрын
I don’t know. My ex showed up at my door and it freaked me the ‘f’ out. I’m now moving next week. Showing up doesn’t mean they love you either. It just is another way to contact you.
@foodmens
Жыл бұрын
Over for him, not you, you are just getting started
@annettebaggett
Жыл бұрын
@@foodmens I don't think I'm just getting started. Only because I dealt with him off and on for 23 years and married him twice. Suddenly, he just doesn't look so good anymore. I've been gone over a year. I don't even miss him. I feel bad that he had a bad childhood, truly. It's no excuse to abuse women.
@foodmens
Жыл бұрын
@@annettebaggett bless your heart, I have no idea what you went through living with someone like that. But I'm glad to hear you're doing better.
@ML-rq5pw Жыл бұрын
Love this, one of your best videos yet! Though everything you post has been so helpful. Thank you for what you do.
@1stBorn5386 ай бұрын
In my 50 yrs of dealing with them, from my mother to my ex....99.999% of the time when they have gone silent, ghosted, discarded, blocked, ignored etc, and it's for any other reason beyond sickness, death or an emergency purposes...then it's them recircling because they want to regain access, to monitor your progression or demise, or for more supply...not because they care or want to check on you, etc...If I were that important to you, then surely you would have reached out long before 2 yrs have passed, anything can happen in 2 yrs.
@docdeveloper335 Жыл бұрын
No use to keep contacts with Narc after you was discarded. Block ,delete ,forget and move on with your new life.
@charmee4045 Жыл бұрын
When I run into my ex narc, I love ignoring him and seeing all the different ways he tries to get my attention, quite comical now.
@HungryH19518 ай бұрын
Excellent information! I received a text with vacation pictures 2 days ago after nearly 3 months of no contact (my decision). I knew it would come eventually but I was still surprised when it did. I haven't responded and don't believe I will. I have been thinking about it for the past two days and now your video has given me more assurance not to respond to the text. I'm sure they are just testing to see if they can still get me to respond to their outreach like I have in the past. It's not like they finally decided they missed me so much or anything like that. Anyway, I appreciate your insightful videos. You seem to have covered almost all the bases. Whatever the narcissist problem someone has you have a video for it. Thanks!
@thewonn Жыл бұрын
You really know your sh🙏T. Amazing
@Jeff-ng5ig Жыл бұрын
Incredibly helpful. Thank you.
@alisha516 Жыл бұрын
I’m jumping ship now! A crazy life once you figure it out.
@Imnotyourdoormat Жыл бұрын
Yep, and always be beyond beware of their dedicated enabler flying monkeys, they may be the ones who seek you out at first. Afrika Korps German General Irwin Rommel known as "the Desert Fox" kept a crew of scouts and forward observers to probe the areas in front of where his army moved. These roaming raiders reported directly back to him where insufficient forces that could easily be conquered were located, as well as where strong forces were that should be avoided. They "enabled" him to earn his famous nickname, and served only for the advancement of Rommel and his tasks at hand.
@ivanramirez8145 Жыл бұрын
Narcissist people do not tolarate narcissist why should you? I took my ex narcisst wife back, only to cheat on her and to go 100% narcissist on her to give her a taste of narcissist like she did to me, then she started to ignore me, Narcissist know that they are not good people, because they do not want another narcissist as a partner.
@thereallisa1 Жыл бұрын
Respond with "unsubscribe"
@susanblackburn2656 Жыл бұрын
Thank you Anoushka
@tammyfitzgerald5336 Жыл бұрын
This dude make my skin crawl when I was near him 3 months ago I knew it was over my heart felt 1000 ❤pounds but I knew what I had to do 🎉❤
@flowerpower4944 Жыл бұрын
Great videos 👍☺️👍 Thanks for all the encouragement
@angelahart1479 Жыл бұрын
No contact from my ex yet. I will prepare my mind should it happen. I still love her but have to stay strong.
@radzhurl8711 Жыл бұрын
That's awe Anoushka, thank you. Blessings also to them they so hurt and can't be healed and we should get out safe. Love to all healing, that's so painful...it can be done without guilt..
@eatyourheartoutwithbecca Жыл бұрын
I’m kind of stupid, someone that I know and was friends with for a short span of time, blocked me and discarded me a few years ago, than I bumped into her at a job interview and she approached me and asked me how I was as if she really cared to know how I was, but she just wanted to tell me about her life and other stuff, than a few months later, got a friend request from her , I didn’t know what to do so I accepted it, but a few days later decided to ask her why she wanted to do that, and after she gave me her BS reply, I took a couple of days to think about what she said, realized it was BS, and then blocked her.
@tamerastone4732 Жыл бұрын
This hasn't happened yet. I think about it tho, cuz I want to b prepared, somewhat?? Thank u, for this video!!!!!!
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Never in a million Here’s that I think my ex creep would come back Like I gave him a narcissistic injury bad but he still attempted after 3 months
@andraewilliams6429 Жыл бұрын
You explains this stuff so well and I must admit you make expression and say certain things that be having me cracking up 😄😄😄😄, I love hearing you talking about how those crazy narcissist behaves...
@jayhugo5316 Жыл бұрын
I discarded mine 6 month ago now I’m getting hit up every 2 weeks ….. I just ignore him and laugh because I know … when you know you know!
@tammyfitzgerald5336
Жыл бұрын
Hell yeah ❤🎉
@deb2319 Жыл бұрын
Excellent Video- You Said IT ALL SO WELL. Peace to all. Thank you Anoushka for this!
@guywithahelmet9597 Жыл бұрын
I don’t think my ex is a narcissist but she’s ghosted me ass. Its been a little over 2 months and I haven’t heard from her. All good tho… I wish her the best
@angelaeley7105
Жыл бұрын
Accept it for what it is bro she is a narcissist
@ninai502910 ай бұрын
Mine after 3 months no contact tried to video call me on my birthday and texted me , saying he would like to explain and apology but no intention to return back. Yeahhhhhh nice try - he has lost his privilege to talk to me forever
@EGIV Жыл бұрын
Thank you for opening my eyes to the narcissist I once dated for 8 years. I always knew something was off but didn't know there was a word for it. Anyway, after 5 years no contact she texted out of the blue to say F you......classic woman.
@BellaClarie
Жыл бұрын
5 years?!! 5 years??! wtf LOL That's random 😂🤣 Who texts an ex from 5 years ago to tell them off?? That's sad .....
@rosalielopez9138
11 ай бұрын
Same story after 7 years no contact ....!!!!
@terrypoffenroth2853 Жыл бұрын
HA !!! My No contact or Grey rock was her with court orders for more money after 12 yrs
@timlonggone Жыл бұрын
Awesome; thanks perfect timing. I’m not a social media person at all. Although you tube I heard this. No f.b. or their branches. No twit. None I only check out y.t. After no contact from a person I was into of five + years. A txt behind three months of no contact.
@patriciahetherington1709 Жыл бұрын
My ex narc blocked me and called last month he was still testing the waters but I'm still blocked 2 months now and at this point he can stay gone and keep me blocked !
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
I’d block and delete him at this point.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
They love to block an unblock what a control tactic
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
@@AlwaysHope2019 Yep. Take away the control by blocking them and deleting their info.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@genxx2724 yes I definitely learned my lesson the last time. But randomly will leave a voicemail but I don’t respond and of course he doesn’t know if I’ve got it or not
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
@@AlwaysHope2019 That’s why you block. It’s better not to receive the that random voice mail.
@jammetmalibu Жыл бұрын
He would try to get in contact to triangulate me and the new supply, as you say, it's all a trick, a con, for me the betrayal was so deep that he knows not to even try. I have a plan in place for anything he can try to pull or Anyone who tries to infiltrate my life of peace.
@patriciaalvarez1523 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this! This is exactly what I’m going trough.
@veselakurteva3624 Жыл бұрын
I have a child with him. No contact is so difficult😢
@royromero5329 Жыл бұрын
I took her back twice, I totally regret it, she was worse and worse every time
@AprilScott-ke9fn Жыл бұрын
That's confusing. He has no way of contacting me. No contact on everything.
@jeffbean6300 Жыл бұрын
WOW WHATS CRAZY IS AS IM IN MY NO CONTACT SHE IS CALLING AS IM WATCHING THIS VIDEO, I DID NOT PICK UP ITS BEEN 13 DAYS. SHE DISCARDED MEOUT OF NOWHERE AND ALWAYS PLAYING GAMES RANDOMLY DOING IT, I WILL NOT BE PICKJNG UP IM STAYING IN NO CONTACT.
@noemikiss6278 Жыл бұрын
I did let him come back to screw me over again. Was a huge huge mistake.
@tabidavdav9923 Жыл бұрын
She did texted through the contact of accomplice niece how she wanted us to talk. Well I replied bc I wasn't havx this knowledge. Anyways that was in August but she never made any efforts towards meeting to talk with me as promised. Anyways by November I texted same accomplice niece and told her I'm now a father to a beautiful baby boy. Since then it was attacks through her proxies so I blocked those permanently. Happy I blocked.
@barbarakesztler3072 Жыл бұрын
I am sending You a big THANK YOU and a big HUG!
@shannondipity Жыл бұрын
I've blocked him or I've deleted everything. He cannot contact me anymore.
@LilCaseyCupcake Жыл бұрын
I’ve been blocked and unblocked for the last 4 years.. the emotional abuse is killing me
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Listen to Cluster B Milkshake...it will help how to repel the narc. 🤮🤢
@qwickvids1140 Жыл бұрын
She called me after 3 weeks. She said “first of all id like to apologize for how things turnes out..” FIRST RED FLAG. And then went on to point out all the things she remembers that i did. Not about the problem, but about what i did about the problem. And when i owned up to my mistakes and gave my reasons to why things happened the way it did, through out the 1.5 hour phone call i was giggling to myself as she was talking because im remembering all the videos i have watched on the subject. She even tried to raise her voice when she was told some truth i gently said “lower your voice.. dont raise your voice its ok…” she came right back down. You can hear her responses change, she was listening more, she tried to cut me off or talk over me but i stayed calm. I wasnt going to answer her call, but i felt like i have moved on enough and built my strength up that i was ok to talk and know when to end the call. It was a good calm understanding phone call. Towards the end she realised alot of her behaviour was wrong now, at the time she didnt realise it and was in denial about it for a long time. She seems like shes wearing her mask telling me about her time in no contact to process it all, but i believe she called me because a flying monkey mate of ours had told her what ive been up to since. I will always have my guard up now i dont believe for one minute that she will change. I believe she was trying to derail me and my focus
@jeanpaulfelix4095
Жыл бұрын
Many don't realize that female narcs are on another level all together. Think of a narc. Then think of a narc with maximum sexual market value.
@Ran_Sim_Pro
Жыл бұрын
@Jean Paul Felix Female narcs have the best sponsor of their narcissism, and it is their sexuality.....
@TheMsmith77 Жыл бұрын
The ex narc was dumped June 2018 and I have never looked back. He would constantly try to call me. I blocked him. He does not want to understand it's over. It's been over. I get hoovers, but I just block and keep pushing.
@tara6503 Жыл бұрын
Anoushka; my narc ex hoovered me 3x before and I took him back after the third try. After our most recent break up, he tried to hoover again 3x until I blocked him. I know he will hoover again and I’m worried he will escalate with an in person hoover at my job or home. Please, what can I do???
@NewNameNaomi
Жыл бұрын
I know how hard this is. I had many sleepless nights when I was convinced I would never heal. I’m so sorry you’re in that place of fear and struggle. You’re not alone. ❤ Think of your ex like an unhealthy addiction, I mean like heroin level unhealthy, and remove him from your life entirely, or as much as you possibly can. Here’s what I’ve done; I changed my phone number and deleted his number so I can’t reach out to him if I’m tempted, I deleted all social media (I knew if I just blocked him I would be tempted to go to his page too and even if he doesn’t know I’m looking, it’s still contact), I removed all mutual contacts from my life, I threw away/donated/burned EVERYTHING he ever gave me (except the fondue pot because my kids love it but I did sage it 😅) and I moved to a new neighborhood. He couldn’t contact me if he wanted to. I know not everyone can do all of that but if you can do any of it, please do. It has saved me and my mental health knowing I don’t have to worry about Hoovers. (The reason I moved is because he DID show up at my house after 4 months zero contact. Luckily someone else answered the door and grey rocked him for me! I still ended up triggered af and scared so I listed my house for sale the next week. This stuff is no joke!)
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Keep watching videos to find out!
@donnalee7379 Жыл бұрын
Your brilliant insight is soooooo helpful Thank you and Merry Christmas 🎁🎄
@derekbarcial6358 Жыл бұрын
Thank you. Yup... started getting messages via Messenger last mo. Supposey a friend reaching out to pass on an apologetic message to me. Interestingly, when I attempted to view this "friend"'s Facebook profile it does not exist. I have a feeling it was my ex incognito. The way she wrote and responded seemed first person rather than a passed on message.
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Yes, they are stupid and send messages under other people names. Like we can not recognize the stile...block everything. She is controlling you thus lowering her anxiety. It is not your job to help her with anxiety. On the contrary you have to elevate it. If he can not contact you it is bad anxiety for them. My idiot went through a distant cousin account and leaving messages under their names...like I would not recognize the stile. I deleted FB!!!! Ha,ha,ha when the anxiety hit the roof because they lost control, I am laughing 🤪😂🤣😂🤣😂. Be safe!
@tangletwister583 Жыл бұрын
Excellent video, and all very true......subscribed🙂👍
Пікірлер: 304
We cannot "unsee" what we have seen. Once we are on to them and see them for who they really are, there is no possible way we will want them in any way!! I love that I have almost nearly reached the point of indifference now. I never thought I feel this way.
@roxanne2977
Жыл бұрын
Same here! The Hoovers get easier and easier to ignore because it finally sinks in how much you know better.
@msthang5366
Жыл бұрын
I cannot unsee the fuckery
@matt-df3xc
Жыл бұрын
Well said. I felt the same way. Over time after no contact it became a sense of indifference, not hate, not animosity, but indifference.
@golnazabaee599
Жыл бұрын
@@matt-df3xc yes indifference is the best revenge. they are just another body in the crowd.
@mostHigh23
Жыл бұрын
Yeah it just doesn't matter anymore. Truth be told everything mines 😜 does is predictable. It's just comical at this point.
I responded to the the Hoover after 6 months of no contact. Now here I am, back watching videos on narcissism. Listen to anoushka, stay no contact!
@prasadzarkar8679
Жыл бұрын
Went through same. They always come to destroy you for what is left. My worst decision ever to respond to her. Now grey rock no contact till I die.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Oh Alexis I did the same thing after six months. He had screenshots of three months before that trying to get a hold of me and he was texting someone else he had my phone number off by one number. And whoever he was texting never said he had the wrong number. I fell for the Hoover in August and like you I’m back to being devalued silent treatments blocking phone hang ups I thought I was educated watching these videos since last February but I still fell for it. At least now I know what to expect and that each time it would get worse I am definitely holding my ground if he ever comes back
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@prasadzarkar8679 absolutely!!!
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
How did he get you to give in if I may ask? Mine did the typical love bomb promises and I fell for it bc I was away from him for so long I actually was still coming out of the trauma bond
@dustinquinton
Жыл бұрын
It’s really hard. Don’t respond. Ever!!!!
No. No. No. do NOT fall for the narcissist. Do not let them back in your life. Do not ever forget what they did to you. Because the Damage is already done. And yes they know what they did to you. There’s no excuse for letting them back in your life. Just walk away and let them go. Good luck and may god bless you all.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
And they will only be 100 times worse if you let them back it’s devastating
@scorpiointutivesoul
Жыл бұрын
If it's mother nd brother then how
@shekinahredmond2852
Жыл бұрын
@scorpiointutivesoul its hard when it's your family. My husband and I had to walk away from his family. He struggles daily, but he's doing it. And our life has been filled with peace since going no contact. Your peace will help you with the decision.
@kristahunter1588
Жыл бұрын
I'm going through the same thing my narcissist's friend. I should call her Text me out of the blue nasty Texts. They're very hurtful but I try to ignore it and I try not to read that's a rhythm. It's hard when there's fifteen twenty of them at a time
@lollygallagher8773
Жыл бұрын
@@shekinahredmond2852 It's been 14 yrs for us. Flying monkeys made it difficult but they have had to go too. Believe it, not a thing changes if you go back, the treatment just gets worse. I know this because they sucked us back in 2X. So like I said 14yrs and 2 flying monkeys in a space of 3 weeks just over a month ago.Still after all this time the same script gets used and no will not be a fool just ignore. Keep your peace and wishing you all the very best in this beautiful life being freeXx
Just seeing their name pop up on phone = OH NO!!!
This is so helpful as it happened to me but he actually out of nowhere came to my door with flowers wanting to be "friends" and it was a shock. On the card he had written he was sorry he had hurt me! I was flooded with all the old feelings or memories but also disgust, and fear, but I gathered myself quickly and said NO. SUDDENLY and simultaneously I saw how truly ugly he was, and WHAT this really was. He made himself appear miserable and lonely, the old trick, and he is, but I did not fall for it. I am forewarned. Thanks Anoushka.
They are just throwing out a line to see if You will bite.
Divert them back to the downgrade they cheated on you with .. by ignoring them.
I don't see anything wrong with them contacting you because they need "supply." The key thing is that they aren't calling with the intention of providing any to YOU. It's not the neediness that's the problem. It's the lack of mutuality.
@susansheehan7965
Жыл бұрын
So true
@jamesgraves9858
Жыл бұрын
Yes. There is no mutuality. They dictate everything. I should have known when the first time we went out after she said I love you (first) I said it again after the date and she said straight to my face "can we not say I love you all the time." Who says that. I was rattled by that and began thinking about if I should say it on holidays or whatever lol I laugh but I am still struggling getting over that trainwreck
After all the pain I’ve gone through to repair the damage he did to me, I don’t see myself responding at all. Yes, if he tries to contact me, I will feel very disturbed and lots of old wounds will reopen. But I know now to protect myself and to keep my power. Thank you for all of your help Anoushka and this video has helped make me think about what reaction I would have if he recontacts me. This way I am now prepared. 💕
@jackiegoodwin.3815
Жыл бұрын
These ppl just pretend It All about them No Compassion/ EMPATHY They are most selfish people They contact to be noisy Or try love bomb.. It hard when you're in relationship 😪 Bloody hard, but baby step💞🤝🙏
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@jackiegoodwin.3815 yes ma am I lived that
@jayce2388
Жыл бұрын
Same here
I promise you don’t give them anything they’re lying if anyone is reading this they don’t love you like she said they’re talking to several people think wisely it’ll never work. Love yourself keep your power ❤💪🏾
Every time my ex tries to Hoover me I always answer the text by saying, what's up baby? How you doing baby? I start acting like a player towards them and they get flabbergasted they don't like the shoe being on the other foot. Another one I use is, what's good bro? Lol take control of the reins good luck everyone!
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
That’s funny. Treat them in a careless, dismissive manner.
This are monsters. No heart, no conscience. You can’t see them as real human beings.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Very true
If the victim begins inquiring about the narcissist to others, the narcissist will find out. This is how it works. The narcissist makes contact and then listens for signs of life on social media, through mutual acquaintances, etc. If contacted, do not engage with anyone until you consult a professional. It is really that serious.
@deaddirt1168
Жыл бұрын
Is it really that hard to ignore someone?
@BaggelasTV
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 yeah. Kinda
@deaddirt1168
Жыл бұрын
@@BaggelasTV let me be more specific I'm talking about an ex that didn't live with you. Excuse my blanket statement.
@BaggelasTV
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 yeah. Doesn’t matter. Emotional connection doesn’t mean they have to live with you
@Threepointfive
Жыл бұрын
@@deaddirt1168 pray you never have to find out
Dumped him yesterday…he emailed that he wanted to “keep the door open” and be friends…ha..typical behavior..,I did not respond…I know he’s already posted on facebook seeing what women he can interest into commenting, or get into a conversation…this is his modest operandi!
Very useful. Thank you for this I have renewed courage. You just described my situation to a T. Been living in hell for 30+ years due to narcissism. I have established no contact. He is dead to me. You wouldn’t believe my story. Stay strong out there people. You are worthy of good things ❤
@achiniwijethunga5963
Жыл бұрын
But for me it is difficult to forget him 😢 but I must do it
Went no contact 5 years ago. A little over 3 years ago he sent an email. He left me alone until 2 weeks ago when he cleaned out my checking and savings account. He made made an ACH transfer and the bank was able to stop it and return MY money. I put the money into another account. Now all of my accounts are frozen because he keeps trying to gain access to them. He's been able to change my pins,mailing address and the list goes on.. thankfully the bank is onto him. I flat out refuse to react to anything he is doing. A few years ago I would have had a melt down and ripped him a new one. Now I just patiently wait for justice. I won,he just hasn't gotten the memo.
I went no contact but it took three months before the trauma bond weakened enough for me to be sure I wouldn't respond if I saw her... itsxa tough journey but needs to be done
@Jeff-ng5ig
Жыл бұрын
Usually about 4 years for me.
Just stay no contact.theyre fishing for emotional responses and emotional responses are a way of bonding yourself as one to their dark energy which in turn gets you trauma bonded again
This information is 100 % absolutely true. It happened to me,and at first i got caught off guard, but after examining what took place i realized that this was another example of her BS. I continued to go no contact and live a better life.
I remember earlier this year I was supposed to be on course on a Sunday, just about 2 days before the course my ex sent me a text me near midnight "I dreamt of you last night". My only reply was "Thanks". On the day of the course, she was also there and I ignored her the entire day as if she didn't exist and the look on her face was priceless. After so much gaslighting, I was not going to allow myself to get played again by her. Needless to say, after that little stunt of mine, she's never disturbed me since XD
It’s been 10 months since no contact. I have seen him twice recently in places I go for lunch, so I now avoid these places. No contact is difficult & requires a lot of mental work. Hard work trying to keep myself in check & stop paranoia taking over. I just want to move forward & keep my peace. I pray he never tries to contact me & I never bump into him. Thanks Anoushka for another informative video 🙏🏻
Oh, forgot to add, he remains BLOCKED!
Thank you for the video. I just left her during another hoover and love bombing attempt by going no contact and completely blocking her from everything. It’s so hard to do. Incredibly hard! This is literally the 7th time I’ve tried to leave her. I’ve never just disappeared on anyone like this ever. It goes against everything I am. However, I know I had to do it. Although I’ll never go back to her I can’t get her out of my mind. I loved that woman sooooo much!!! It’s just hard to believe I fell in love with an illusion. It hurts so much. I am staying strong though but I just wish I could get her out of my head. 🥺😢😢
@SweetMoses365
Жыл бұрын
I’m on day 2 bro. Hang in there. Hardest thing in the world.
@mikep4472
Жыл бұрын
@@SweetMoses365 Thank you! 🙏🏼🙏🏼stay strong and hang in there too. It’s a long emotional roller coaster!! I hope we can all come out better and stronger in the end! I’m sorry you’re going through it too. 🥺🥺🙏🏼🙏🏼 it sucks so bad these people do this to us! 😢😢
@sukoelpiucho
Жыл бұрын
I had a narcisist ex girlfriend. Leaving her was one of the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. There were multiple previous attempts to leave her before, but it only lasted minutes to days and I always got back with her. I just could not stay without her. I really thought I was never gonna make it. I was really suffering. It was so bad at times, how it made me feel being with her, that I just wanted to hurt myself or even end my life. I even went to a rehab place for 28 days, cuz I was such a mess and had lost all the power to go no contact with her. I have almost 2 months now of absolutely 0 no contact at all. I have thought about this person everyday for the last 2 months. When I got out of rehab, where I had no phone or computer access, I was afraid that I was going to try to look here up after I resume my regular life. I have thought about it and wanted to do it, but I have not contacted her because I want to be free AND PEOPLE NEED TO BE FREE. Even if it gets so hard at times, I won't do it, because I don't want to feel as bad as I felt when I was in that relationship. Now I understand that I don't need to get it out of my head, because I now know that it will only come with time. What I do need to know is that no matter what happens or how bad I may feel some days, I know it will never be as bad as when I was with her. I blocked her from everything 2 months ago and if she were to try to contact me in the near future, I won't talk to her. I will just hung up and block whatever number, text or email she tried to contact me from. Stay strong, it doesn't matter if we think about that person all day, or if everything reminds me of that person, what matters is to stay clean/no contact from that person, no matter how we may feel, whatever it is, it will pass. We are now in the pain of growing and not anymore in the pain of suffering...
@mikep4472
Жыл бұрын
@@sukoelpiucho wow thank you for sharing and for your help. I appreciate you and glad you’re healing as well. It is so hard like you say. Also it’s so strange in my mind I wish she would contact me but only for a brief moment then i have to remind myself of all the things she did and then i become anxious if she does try to contact me. I love the last sentence of your reply! Makes so much sense. And yes one step at a time we will just keep pushing forward and i am hoping the day comes sooner than later we are all stronger after all of this passes. I’m sorry you went through this as well. My heart goes out to all that gave everything to these people and we basically got our heart and souls ripped out and stomped on in return. Stay strong too in your journey to recovery i wish you the absolute best and to all the others reading this here. Take care. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
@melaniedubreuil5331
Жыл бұрын
Yeah...illusion...That Hurt so much. Its like theatre decor that fall down. Sorry my english is bad haha
This ABSOLUTELY happened to me. I did NOT respond in ANY way, shape or form.
@donnacrowe1913
Жыл бұрын
6 months no contact , 2 hoovers I didn't respond....
@brianbroussard4433
Жыл бұрын
@@donnacrowe1913 good job!!!
After 7 years no contact/blocking the narc, I suddenly got a pop up Facebook message from him. I said to myself "oh no no!", swiped the circle with that face off my phone WITHOUT reading the message, and re blocked him. The next day after I had done this, I got 3 hang up calls in a row from him. Now THATS the true narc reacting to my rejection!
This was a doosey. The person used a fake account using one of my relatives names with no picture. Then sent a message via FB messenger. The lowdown, painful, irony was, my relative had passed away three days prior. I was livid. These people have no limits to their disorder.
@come_on_barbie_123
Жыл бұрын
😯😯😯😯
You have said something like they can't Bonding in a healthy way and detach in a healthy way, and that's why they think the relationship has never really ended its on a pause only in the narsisist mind. And that is the reason why they hoover later.
Their actions remind me of the movie "A beautiful mind" where the voices in his mind keep returning to try and sway him again. In the end, he said, " The voices are still there but I ignore them." My x still pokes her head in once in a while. I remind her of her bad choices. Then she goes dark again. Cold water on her. She knows she lost me. It is gratifying.
a message landed in 'blocked messages'....after over 2 years. a cryptic clip from some song. I'll bet if I called and said something like 'get a clue', it would say something like 'it was a butt call'....yea, a butt went into 'contacts' then tapped the alphabet slider, then called me....but I ain't gonna do that. they are dead to me......I did get triggered though.
He stalked me for 4 mths. Appearing at my house at nite.i kept saying go away. In the end I warned him twice, I will call police for harassing me. It's been 2 weeks n so far he's left alone.
I was love bombed in the discard.Probably a tactic to use at a later date to get back in contact if the new supply doesn't work out.
I went no contact from mother and stepfather 5 years ago after years of abuse. I'm nearly 47 years old and a mother myself so I have been busy raising my children and being with my family. I have had phone calls and emails all of which I have blocked. They have been insulting and demeaning especially when I haven't responded t them phoning and telling me the grandparents died. My mother attended the funeral of my friend earlier this year just to try and talk to me! I used grey rocking and only said a single word. I have had flying monkeys tell me to go and see my mother because she apparently has been crying on her shoulder telling her she just wants to see me. She doesn't want me! She's never wanted me! She just wants the control!
I left him and I'm so glad ,
Yes that's completely true. I'm in no contact and I will not let him destroy my process to healing
Being no contact from the Narcissist is great. I don't care if we never see our daughter-in-law again but, not being able to see our grandson & son is so different than when the Narc is just a former friend.
I never have to worry about this. That person will never talk to me again.
I'm writing this comment at around the 3 min mark of the video. There are honestly only two ways to handle someone that is suffering from NPD during no contact. You get a court order and/or you continue to grey-rock them. I really wish this channel owner would get really deep into this subject of grey rock! Now back to the video!
"Not interested" "Nah, I'm good" I hope I get to use the Katt Williams line: "Your services are no longer required... Dismissed."
~NO CONTACT FOREVER ~ Best remedy ❤
They can try all they want. They don’t have my new phone number and they’re not allowed in my house or on my social media. I am the one in control and I don’t have to be at their beck and call.
I changed my phone number. Blocked on all social media accounts when I moved out. He best not ever come to my home because he would surely be gargling with my pepper spray.
These videos are my guiding light these days. Without them I’d be dropping right back into he cycle.
11:20 "Remember it's a trick" This gave me pause because ultimately the narcissist uses "tricks" or what I call "plays" to again establish control over their target for whatever likely dubious purpose they have. The problem is if it's not dubious you can't really tell that from their past behavior. Correct me if I'm seeing it wrong!
@sleeperno1215
Жыл бұрын
Believe it or not, everything is calculated.
OMG I never want to see him 🤣😂
After everything I've learnt about toxic behaviour from you and others, I will ignore and inwardly smile. THANKS 🙏
Im gonna give you the best advise , if they try to reach outnto you dont answer act like you dont see or hear anything act as if you dont know them.and keep moving they think you are stupid and easy .
That's why we always emphasize that you need to become unreachable by them. Block, as opposed to just not responding to what they say. What you're about to say, I don't wanna know.
Narcissists are stupid and overestimate their abilities so embarrassment and looking bad are common and inevitable for them. They won't let go and will keep coming back no matter how many times they're rejected ... especially if you are a highly valued prize or someone they envy. The promise of a narcissistic payout is too tempting to pass up ... getting an prized ex back that left is incredible supply and an unmatched ego stroke
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Ha,ha he is coming after me for 15 years.... I remember how he throw the new supply into my face all happy and proud that he hurt me. Who is laughing now :))) The look on his miserable face was the best karma! 😂🤣😂🤣😂
All it is supply
Thank you I needed this! All too familiar. After 2 years of this nonstop I decided I had enough.
I look forward to the day when I get interested in someone new.
My narc doesn't want me back until she sees me happy and trying to move forward without her. Then she starts with the calls and the texts. When that doesn't work, she will cause a bunch of drama. She will harass people and use my kids as weapons. She's out of control and refuses to get help.
@TheSpiritRoom23
Жыл бұрын
Mine too which is so weird. But he acts bored when we’re together
The timing of this . Wow
Thank you for this video. I watch a lot of yours and this particular one really resonated with me. I am currently waiting for my boyfriend (and I use that term loosely) to contact me again after his usual silent treatment which lasts weeks, sometimes months. Currently we're on just over a week of silence (which is a punishment for me speaking my own mind last week). He will probably send me a question mark when he's ready to communicate again.... My struggle is ignoring him and going no contact. I believe I have a trauma bond and I also believe I am head over heels in love with him. I am constantly thinking about him and the sort of response I will give him when the communication finally comes. I am a well adjusted 52 year old who can plainly see what has been happening now for over 2 years. I discovered he was a covert narcissistic from watching these videos!I just can't seem to get out of this loop. My remedy (I thought) was to meet and date as many men as possible to try and move on from him but I cannot seem to feel the same about anyone else. Friends tell me to be strong and ignore him but it's easier said than done. Once again many thanks
@sleeperno1215
Жыл бұрын
Block him on the phone and all social media. Information is their source of supply. Starve him.
@annettebaggett
Жыл бұрын
Don't beat yourself up so for how you feel. . I felt that way for 23 years off and on as he cycled through the other supplies.. There's always other supplies that he sat on the shelf and, kept in contact with to take down and use, to meet his needs. . Now that I know what was happening, and was honest with myself that I deserved better. Even though I am alone now, I have such peace in my life. I spent a lot of time in prayer, and mourned the loss of the illusion of what I thought I had. . It helps to remind yourself of all the bad things he did. Also , when I felt weak, I would watch one of these empowering videos. His actions clearly proved that he didn't love me. He just loved the services I supplied to him. A janitor with benefits. Love yourself more than that. And remember, he doesn't love any of the other women either. They are supply for an empty hole he will never be able to fill. No Matter how many others he cycles through. .. and that's where they go when they're not talking to you. ...
@oceanoftheseamermaidnastia6209
Жыл бұрын
That was my first taught i got super depressed and sad suffered from insomnia from a person i loved and didnt even love me back . False promises future faking the lies the manipulation i was losing it lol i had to get a grip on myself i almost lost myself over a person who didn’t even care about me . Blocking them works DNT answer private calls and stay busy I finally started working out first time in the gym and after feeling better n releasing my pain and stress I learned to love myself and making rigid boundaries and loving myself and invested in my career. Im better off own . I tell myself i dnt want no friends or association with someone who intentionally maliciously hurt me over n over again in good
No Contact. I agree. Responding to the Narc: after silence,. You are giving the Narc: permission to come back. Be cold. Don't Respond. Let 'em know, that door is shut-boltered-lockdown.
My husband sent a cowardly text. smh ! if you really cared, wouldn't you call, or show up at my door ? ... however I'm glad he just texted... I never responded. it's over for me !
@NewNameNaomi
Жыл бұрын
I don’t know. My ex showed up at my door and it freaked me the ‘f’ out. I’m now moving next week. Showing up doesn’t mean they love you either. It just is another way to contact you.
@foodmens
Жыл бұрын
Over for him, not you, you are just getting started
@annettebaggett
Жыл бұрын
@@foodmens I don't think I'm just getting started. Only because I dealt with him off and on for 23 years and married him twice. Suddenly, he just doesn't look so good anymore. I've been gone over a year. I don't even miss him. I feel bad that he had a bad childhood, truly. It's no excuse to abuse women.
@foodmens
Жыл бұрын
@@annettebaggett bless your heart, I have no idea what you went through living with someone like that. But I'm glad to hear you're doing better.
Love this, one of your best videos yet! Though everything you post has been so helpful. Thank you for what you do.
In my 50 yrs of dealing with them, from my mother to my ex....99.999% of the time when they have gone silent, ghosted, discarded, blocked, ignored etc, and it's for any other reason beyond sickness, death or an emergency purposes...then it's them recircling because they want to regain access, to monitor your progression or demise, or for more supply...not because they care or want to check on you, etc...If I were that important to you, then surely you would have reached out long before 2 yrs have passed, anything can happen in 2 yrs.
No use to keep contacts with Narc after you was discarded. Block ,delete ,forget and move on with your new life.
When I run into my ex narc, I love ignoring him and seeing all the different ways he tries to get my attention, quite comical now.
Excellent information! I received a text with vacation pictures 2 days ago after nearly 3 months of no contact (my decision). I knew it would come eventually but I was still surprised when it did. I haven't responded and don't believe I will. I have been thinking about it for the past two days and now your video has given me more assurance not to respond to the text. I'm sure they are just testing to see if they can still get me to respond to their outreach like I have in the past. It's not like they finally decided they missed me so much or anything like that. Anyway, I appreciate your insightful videos. You seem to have covered almost all the bases. Whatever the narcissist problem someone has you have a video for it. Thanks!
You really know your sh🙏T. Amazing
Incredibly helpful. Thank you.
I’m jumping ship now! A crazy life once you figure it out.
Yep, and always be beyond beware of their dedicated enabler flying monkeys, they may be the ones who seek you out at first. Afrika Korps German General Irwin Rommel known as "the Desert Fox" kept a crew of scouts and forward observers to probe the areas in front of where his army moved. These roaming raiders reported directly back to him where insufficient forces that could easily be conquered were located, as well as where strong forces were that should be avoided. They "enabled" him to earn his famous nickname, and served only for the advancement of Rommel and his tasks at hand.
Narcissist people do not tolarate narcissist why should you? I took my ex narcisst wife back, only to cheat on her and to go 100% narcissist on her to give her a taste of narcissist like she did to me, then she started to ignore me, Narcissist know that they are not good people, because they do not want another narcissist as a partner.
Respond with "unsubscribe"
Thank you Anoushka
This dude make my skin crawl when I was near him 3 months ago I knew it was over my heart felt 1000 ❤pounds but I knew what I had to do 🎉❤
Great videos 👍☺️👍 Thanks for all the encouragement
No contact from my ex yet. I will prepare my mind should it happen. I still love her but have to stay strong.
That's awe Anoushka, thank you. Blessings also to them they so hurt and can't be healed and we should get out safe. Love to all healing, that's so painful...it can be done without guilt..
I’m kind of stupid, someone that I know and was friends with for a short span of time, blocked me and discarded me a few years ago, than I bumped into her at a job interview and she approached me and asked me how I was as if she really cared to know how I was, but she just wanted to tell me about her life and other stuff, than a few months later, got a friend request from her , I didn’t know what to do so I accepted it, but a few days later decided to ask her why she wanted to do that, and after she gave me her BS reply, I took a couple of days to think about what she said, realized it was BS, and then blocked her.
This hasn't happened yet. I think about it tho, cuz I want to b prepared, somewhat?? Thank u, for this video!!!!!!
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
Never in a million Here’s that I think my ex creep would come back Like I gave him a narcissistic injury bad but he still attempted after 3 months
You explains this stuff so well and I must admit you make expression and say certain things that be having me cracking up 😄😄😄😄, I love hearing you talking about how those crazy narcissist behaves...
I discarded mine 6 month ago now I’m getting hit up every 2 weeks ….. I just ignore him and laugh because I know … when you know you know!
@tammyfitzgerald5336
Жыл бұрын
Hell yeah ❤🎉
Excellent Video- You Said IT ALL SO WELL. Peace to all. Thank you Anoushka for this!
I don’t think my ex is a narcissist but she’s ghosted me ass. Its been a little over 2 months and I haven’t heard from her. All good tho… I wish her the best
@angelaeley7105
Жыл бұрын
Accept it for what it is bro she is a narcissist
Mine after 3 months no contact tried to video call me on my birthday and texted me , saying he would like to explain and apology but no intention to return back. Yeahhhhhh nice try - he has lost his privilege to talk to me forever
Thank you for opening my eyes to the narcissist I once dated for 8 years. I always knew something was off but didn't know there was a word for it. Anyway, after 5 years no contact she texted out of the blue to say F you......classic woman.
@BellaClarie
Жыл бұрын
5 years?!! 5 years??! wtf LOL That's random 😂🤣 Who texts an ex from 5 years ago to tell them off?? That's sad .....
@rosalielopez9138
11 ай бұрын
Same story after 7 years no contact ....!!!!
HA !!! My No contact or Grey rock was her with court orders for more money after 12 yrs
Awesome; thanks perfect timing. I’m not a social media person at all. Although you tube I heard this. No f.b. or their branches. No twit. None I only check out y.t. After no contact from a person I was into of five + years. A txt behind three months of no contact.
My ex narc blocked me and called last month he was still testing the waters but I'm still blocked 2 months now and at this point he can stay gone and keep me blocked !
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
I’d block and delete him at this point.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
They love to block an unblock what a control tactic
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
@@AlwaysHope2019 Yep. Take away the control by blocking them and deleting their info.
@AlwaysHope2019
Жыл бұрын
@@genxx2724 yes I definitely learned my lesson the last time. But randomly will leave a voicemail but I don’t respond and of course he doesn’t know if I’ve got it or not
@genxx2724
Жыл бұрын
@@AlwaysHope2019 That’s why you block. It’s better not to receive the that random voice mail.
He would try to get in contact to triangulate me and the new supply, as you say, it's all a trick, a con, for me the betrayal was so deep that he knows not to even try. I have a plan in place for anything he can try to pull or Anyone who tries to infiltrate my life of peace.
Thank you so much for this! This is exactly what I’m going trough.
I have a child with him. No contact is so difficult😢
I took her back twice, I totally regret it, she was worse and worse every time
That's confusing. He has no way of contacting me. No contact on everything.
WOW WHATS CRAZY IS AS IM IN MY NO CONTACT SHE IS CALLING AS IM WATCHING THIS VIDEO, I DID NOT PICK UP ITS BEEN 13 DAYS. SHE DISCARDED MEOUT OF NOWHERE AND ALWAYS PLAYING GAMES RANDOMLY DOING IT, I WILL NOT BE PICKJNG UP IM STAYING IN NO CONTACT.
I did let him come back to screw me over again. Was a huge huge mistake.
She did texted through the contact of accomplice niece how she wanted us to talk. Well I replied bc I wasn't havx this knowledge. Anyways that was in August but she never made any efforts towards meeting to talk with me as promised. Anyways by November I texted same accomplice niece and told her I'm now a father to a beautiful baby boy. Since then it was attacks through her proxies so I blocked those permanently. Happy I blocked.
I am sending You a big THANK YOU and a big HUG!
I've blocked him or I've deleted everything. He cannot contact me anymore.
I’ve been blocked and unblocked for the last 4 years.. the emotional abuse is killing me
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Listen to Cluster B Milkshake...it will help how to repel the narc. 🤮🤢
She called me after 3 weeks. She said “first of all id like to apologize for how things turnes out..” FIRST RED FLAG. And then went on to point out all the things she remembers that i did. Not about the problem, but about what i did about the problem. And when i owned up to my mistakes and gave my reasons to why things happened the way it did, through out the 1.5 hour phone call i was giggling to myself as she was talking because im remembering all the videos i have watched on the subject. She even tried to raise her voice when she was told some truth i gently said “lower your voice.. dont raise your voice its ok…” she came right back down. You can hear her responses change, she was listening more, she tried to cut me off or talk over me but i stayed calm. I wasnt going to answer her call, but i felt like i have moved on enough and built my strength up that i was ok to talk and know when to end the call. It was a good calm understanding phone call. Towards the end she realised alot of her behaviour was wrong now, at the time she didnt realise it and was in denial about it for a long time. She seems like shes wearing her mask telling me about her time in no contact to process it all, but i believe she called me because a flying monkey mate of ours had told her what ive been up to since. I will always have my guard up now i dont believe for one minute that she will change. I believe she was trying to derail me and my focus
@jeanpaulfelix4095
Жыл бұрын
Many don't realize that female narcs are on another level all together. Think of a narc. Then think of a narc with maximum sexual market value.
@Ran_Sim_Pro
Жыл бұрын
@Jean Paul Felix Female narcs have the best sponsor of their narcissism, and it is their sexuality.....
The ex narc was dumped June 2018 and I have never looked back. He would constantly try to call me. I blocked him. He does not want to understand it's over. It's been over. I get hoovers, but I just block and keep pushing.
Anoushka; my narc ex hoovered me 3x before and I took him back after the third try. After our most recent break up, he tried to hoover again 3x until I blocked him. I know he will hoover again and I’m worried he will escalate with an in person hoover at my job or home. Please, what can I do???
@NewNameNaomi
Жыл бұрын
I know how hard this is. I had many sleepless nights when I was convinced I would never heal. I’m so sorry you’re in that place of fear and struggle. You’re not alone. ❤ Think of your ex like an unhealthy addiction, I mean like heroin level unhealthy, and remove him from your life entirely, or as much as you possibly can. Here’s what I’ve done; I changed my phone number and deleted his number so I can’t reach out to him if I’m tempted, I deleted all social media (I knew if I just blocked him I would be tempted to go to his page too and even if he doesn’t know I’m looking, it’s still contact), I removed all mutual contacts from my life, I threw away/donated/burned EVERYTHING he ever gave me (except the fondue pot because my kids love it but I did sage it 😅) and I moved to a new neighborhood. He couldn’t contact me if he wanted to. I know not everyone can do all of that but if you can do any of it, please do. It has saved me and my mental health knowing I don’t have to worry about Hoovers. (The reason I moved is because he DID show up at my house after 4 months zero contact. Luckily someone else answered the door and grey rocked him for me! I still ended up triggered af and scared so I listed my house for sale the next week. This stuff is no joke!)
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Keep watching videos to find out!
Your brilliant insight is soooooo helpful Thank you and Merry Christmas 🎁🎄
Thank you. Yup... started getting messages via Messenger last mo. Supposey a friend reaching out to pass on an apologetic message to me. Interestingly, when I attempted to view this "friend"'s Facebook profile it does not exist. I have a feeling it was my ex incognito. The way she wrote and responded seemed first person rather than a passed on message.
@NMTDelightfulMusic
Жыл бұрын
Yes, they are stupid and send messages under other people names. Like we can not recognize the stile...block everything. She is controlling you thus lowering her anxiety. It is not your job to help her with anxiety. On the contrary you have to elevate it. If he can not contact you it is bad anxiety for them. My idiot went through a distant cousin account and leaving messages under their names...like I would not recognize the stile. I deleted FB!!!! Ha,ha,ha when the anxiety hit the roof because they lost control, I am laughing 🤪😂🤣😂🤣😂. Be safe!
Excellent video, and all very true......subscribed🙂👍