I love this representation! As an ace person hoping to be a solo mum, this was amazing to watch

@queenofdramatech

9 ай бұрын

I love the idea of solo parenting as a single woman!!!

@88marome

9 ай бұрын

Is there representation for ace people who parent with a partner?

@Rb66jb2hc

22 күн бұрын

And you think that would be fair to a son? To be raised by a woman by herself by choice? SELFISH

So glad we were able to make this happen! Thanks for having me on your channel :) xxx

@gabystringer2056

9 ай бұрын

I've watched your blogs YEARS ago and so happy to see this! Congratulations 🎉

@Rb66jb2hc

22 күн бұрын

I don’t see how it’s responsible to raise a son by yourself by choice. You are not capable of teaching a man how to be a man. You have done that child a disservice intentionally- that is not okay. It’s selfish and self serving

Ooh I loved this episode! As a fellow ace but child free by choice I loved seeing this experience and I loved hearing how she is raising him, how supportive her parens are and how she built a really great community of solo parents! I love it!

Bryony is so amazingly well-spoken and entertaining, you just got to love her❤

Nice to see Bryony on the channel! I’ve followed her for years. I find it a bit weird that people would say “I’m solo parenting for the day”, unless it’s just in a jokey way. That’s just parenting imo. I guess they could say ‘I’m on my own with them today’ but other than that, looking after your child alone is a pretty normal part of parenting. Bit like how people sometimes say that Dad is ‘babysitting’, when actually they’re just parenting. I think when people make sexualising comments about young children you could reply with “that’s a weird thing to say about a baby” so maybe it prompts them to think about if what they said is appropriate. But yeah I agree that it’s gross and icky

Bryony taught me about menstruation and menstrual products when I was a teenager, she's got such a special in my heart ❤️

You spoke about people saying things about baby being a heartbreaker, or going to have lots of girlfriends etc. This has been one of my huge pet peeves with having two boys. My boys are both super cute - long eyelashes, bright blue eyes, etc - and we get so many comments on how oh, they'll be trouble with the girls! 1) who knows who they'll like when they are older? If anyone! 2) i would hope i raise my children to respect everyone! To not go around "breaking hearts" just because. And yes, part of younger relationships is having a breakup or small heartbreak, but i feel like the comments make it seem like they'll do it on purpose - like they'll be doing it maliciously. And lastly, comments on how "oh, Dads will have to watch out for them!" I would hope if either of my kids eventually got a partner, that they wouldn't be threatened by that person's parents. How terrifying of a thought! (I live in rural Canada, so unfortunately comments like that are very very common) Its something i have lots of thoughts on 😅

@meganwarrick3673

9 ай бұрын

Totally agree, I have two boys, seeing all the comments from girl mums of “I won’t let your dusty son around my daughter” all over tik tok meanwhile her daughter is 2 so they’re literally talking about 2 year old little boys it’s shocking the stigma boy mums get yet it’s girl mums who you need to look out for a lot of the time

@livelongandprospermary8796

9 ай бұрын

The way I’d be like “well for now he’s just working on using silverware and cups and his biggest interest is Bluey since he’s, ya know, a toddler”

@lezliesmith3354

9 ай бұрын

@@livelongandprospermary8796 oh i get very snarky back. not proud of the things I've said in some of those situations, but sometimes my mouth acts faster than my brain, lol

As someone on the ace spectrum solo parenting was my plan for a long time. That's no longer the case, but I still love learning more about this experience! I also related to so much that Bryony said and am giving her a follow

What a joy to see Bryony on the channel! I’ve been following her for a while and it’s great to hear this conversation- I relate to her a lot

I'm a single mom by choice too, and also started my treatments earlier, in my late twenties! I've been trying to find more SMBC on KZread so am happy to see there's more of us.

Thank you for this. I am demi and have known I want kids for longer than I have know that. And now at 26 I am looking at the options, but the world really is built to be easier in two player mode. So taking the leap to take it on solo is so much more of a comitment

Thank you for this Hannah! I am ace-ish and on a single parent journey through adoption and I really appreciate being introduced to someone who is living a similar experience to the one I am planning!

Thanks for coming on the channel Bryony - and thanks for having her Hannah, I relate so much to Bryony as a heterorom ace and you have definitely gained a new subscriber!

When I was just a tiny teen getting into reusable period products I used to watch Bryony! I thought I recognised her all these years later from the thumbnail, how cool! And now we are both mamas! 😊❤

The test Bryony mentioned is called a “hicozy” (sp?) scan in the UK, is called an HSG (hysterosalpingiogram) in the US. As a Radiographer (X-ray Technologist) I assisted in quite a few instances of that test in a hospital setting. The interesting thing is that it is extremely painful for SOME women, while it isn’t painful at all for others, and there didn’t seem to be any logical connection between the ones that were or were not in significant pain. I am also someone who struggled with infertility for 6 years, and as part of the infertility screenings I had an HSG myself, and while I went into the procedure being fully aware that it could be very painful it ended up not hurting at all for me. It mostly felt like a little bit of pressure, kind of like bloating, and within a few hours I felt completely normal. My IUI procedures were much more uncomfortable for me, with more significant feeling of bloating and crampiness afterwards for the rest of the day. I wouldn’t say that a HSG is a procedure that should require sedation, because it is usually a very quick procedure, and the risks of sedation are much higher than it would be worth for such a short time period. But perhaps better patient education or resources to preemptively administer pain medication to minimize any pain or discomfort during the procedure could be beneficial.

@Jaybee-eg5on

9 ай бұрын

They’re 2 different tests. Hycosy is a more modern version of the HSG that uses ultrasound rather than X-ray.

@philippawood5047

9 ай бұрын

I could not help but think of the podcast The Retrievals when Bryony mentioned that... worth a listen for anyone interested in women's health. We have so far to go in terms of how we treat and validate women and allow them to take ownership of their reproductive health, glad these two are having important conversations like this.

omg!!! I haven't seen Bryony in so long!!! I used to watch her reviews when I was struggling with using period products. Glad to see she is still around!

love the chat about community at the end, so important!

omgggg i have felt like Bryony is a hidden gem for years!! so cool that you have her on!!

Finally! I have been waiting for you two to colab for YEARS! 😍😍

So excited to see Bryony on you channel!! Been following her for years through many phases of life and she’s such a breath of fresh air on the internet.

The crossover I didn't know I needed, but so glad is here 🙏

I’m so happy to see adenomyosis talked about! I’d never even heard of it when I got diagnosed with it a year and a half ago and now I’m waiting for my endo excision surgery in 10 days time after trying to get diagnosed for 7 years afab healthcare in the uk is just shocking 😭

@toin9898

9 ай бұрын

happy healing! I had a laparoscopy (including endo removal) earlier this year and it wasn't too bad. The 15 years trying to get diagnosed, not so much BUT on the plus side it made the recovery pain feel tolerable relative to the cramps I used to have.

This is such an important topic and as an ace child free by choice person, I am incredibly appreciative that the solo-parenting ace community has a representative like Bryony!

Been watching Bryony for years! So nice to see this collaboration!! ❤

I'm so excited to see Byrony on your channel (and you on hers)! Can't wait to watch them both 😊

Thanks Hannah and Bryony for the awesome collab! I so hope this happens again, particularly along your parenting journeys. I’ve followed you both for years and love the way your content and experience comes across. I so want a kid one day but for now I’m just delving into parenting KZread 😆 The way you were chatting together comes off so naturally and interesting. Love it ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

What a great crossover! Love it when different KZreadrs I follow join together. Both of you are wonderful. :)

Loved both of your channels for years and glad to see you guys together! Lots of interesting topics discussed

I didn’t know I needed this collab.

Great to hear from a solo parent. Thank you for the reminder to support our solo parent friends! Would love to hear some concrete ways we can offer help?

Loved this topic! Honestly I think this would be an interesting series of sorts to also have other different types of parents like parents who are poly or foster parents. Both were brought up and I think it would be so interesting to hear more about that 😊

This was such a lovely thoughtful chat ❤

I had a fertility MOT done at 25 and found out everything looked structurally healthy and I had more eggs that the average 25 year old woman, so I probably had slightly longer than the average woman to conceive. This makes sense seeing as women in my family tend to go through menopause quite late, my mum's mum had no trouble conceiving at 40! Was really reassuring to do and since I was already married at the time, my husband and I were able to plan out our timeline

Loved this! So great to hear from a perspective that’s so under-represented

I AM SO THRILLLLLED TO SEE THIS COLLAB. I'VE BEEN WATCHING BRYONY ON KZread SINCE HER PRE-PRECIOUS STARS CLOTH PAD VLOG DAYS AND SHE IS AN EFFIN QUEEEEEN!!!!!!!!!

Loved this conversation, so many valuable insights!

Did not expect this collab! 😁

Since Bryony mentions the difference between single and solo parent, I've sometimes wondered if there is a different term for a parent that is single and the only parent to a child (for whatever reason) and a parent that just isn't in a relationship with the other parent but they still share custody. Because I think it also makes a difference if you're the only parent a child has or whether there is another person you can rely on who takes care of the child on a regular basis and also supports them financially.

@lucillerenard9019

9 ай бұрын

I've heard the term co-parent quite a bit for the second situation!

@Chelseabee55

9 ай бұрын

Yeah i think someone can be both a single parent and be coparenting. Like if a couple divorced or were never together, you’re single (not in a committed relationship) but also sharing custody of that child with another parent

@nicoletom8753

9 ай бұрын

Any situation where there is only one parent (due to death, abandonment etc), its solo parenting.

I love this I am also ace and working towards being a solo parent and when I mentioned it to my obgyn I expected push back but instead they gave me great info on where to go when I get started trying

Thanks so much! This was so interesting! I would have watched 4 hours of you chatting 😍

So excited to see Hannah and Bryony together!!

I am so happy to see this video! I’ve been following you both for years!

Loved this collab!

The crossover I didn't know I needed! I've known both of you for so long, it's crazy we all have babies now 😂 This reminded me that I need to get more books for my daughter that show different family configurations. I'm bisexual, so it is also important to me that she grows up knowing that we'll love her no matter what. Loved what Bryony said about her child growing up not needing to come out, that's what I strive for as well. Love you both ❤

Love this collab we need more of this ❤❤

I just cried watching this video. Thank you, thank you so much

How cool, I’ve been watching Bryony for so long!

This was WONDERFUL to stumble across. I’m older. And depending how/ when/ where you grew up your access to information about sexuality can be / was limited. Even if it’s on the internet, if you don’t know it exists to go looking for it, you can easily never come across things that help you learn about yourself. I never heard of A sexuality until I was in my mid 20s and even then it was just aero/ ace full stop. It wasn’t until I was in my mid 30s that I found out there was more. Before I heard “it’s a spectrum” and “sexuality can be fluid”. I finally went down that research rabbit hole and found my situation very much like this. Only my condition is diagnosed endometriosis. But I’m also older. And I spent too long waiting to meet someone to start a family (you just haven’t met the one!) and not enough time trying to put myself into the financial position to do it alone. So I don’t think I’ll ever be in the position to physically have AND financially support a child. But I’m hoping to foster one day so this was interesting on so many levels. Thank you for this ❤️

Love this collab! Been following you both forever x

What a great conversation! I love to see unconventional parents represented. I would love to hear you talk about your thoughts on deciding whether or not to have a second child. I’m currently struggling with this and would be great to hear some different takes.

i loved listening to her! and hearing about this community of helping each other made me tear up a bit

Such a nice video, and very happy to meet Bryony, because I'm going on my solo parent journey soon

I used to watch their videos MANY years ago when I was deciding on my first menstrual cup. They were so helpful! I lost track of their channel so I'm so happy to see this collab! Congratulations, by the way!!

Ahh - looking forward to watching this Been following you both for like 5-7 years or something!

No way!!!!! I have watched you both for YEARS

Love this collaboration 😊

omg I didn't know I needed this collar

Love this collab!

So great to see some ace solo parent representation! I'm aroace and preparing to become a single mother by choice. There must be lots of us out there ❤

I love watching Bryony and love to see her very supportive, loving family help with her solo life.

This was so interesting, thank you so much for sharing your experience. I'd love a follow up when the kids are a bit older and see what things might be different then.

this was so interesting!!!! i'm gonna subscribe to bryony now x

Such a cool convo!

what an incredible collab

@greensteve9307

9 ай бұрын

I have been waiting for this colab for YEARS! 😍😍

Oh thank you! I definitely resonate with that feeling when the decision was made. ❤❤ I’m an American who will be living in the UK when I do this, it was suuuper helpful!! Thank you!

Such an amazing video, so interesting !!!

My two fav KZreadrs!!! ❤

omg I’ve been watching bryony for 10 years! Love her

Omg, I used to watch Bryiony back in the day, when I was looking for tips about buying menstrual cups. I remember when she got her fist foster child but I jad no idea she has a kid of her own now. That's so cool. Especially that she's able to talk about the experience of being an ace spectrum parent, because asexuality is still so missunderstood by society.

So interesting! I was diagnosed with endo and adeno at 21. I'd been with my boyfriend (now husband) for a year at that point. The gyno said the combo means every year that passes is reducing the chances of conception. So we sat down and really talked about it. I was pregnant at 23, miscarried, pregnant again at 23, had our daughter, pregnant at 25, miscarried and now I'm pregnant at 27. I'm so glad we started when we did. I can't imagine what I'd have done if I'd heard that news while single or on the ace spectrum. Absolute props to do it on your own - wow!

What an informative video. Thats absolutely amazing. I always say parent is a parent no matter how, why, who, how many etc.

Omg Bryony!! I learned about reusable pads from your content and purchased loads of your products! ♡♡♡

Fascinating watch, thank you. I follow Bryony and found myself more empathic towards her situation on hearing the story of her decision to solo-parent. As a mother in her mid sixties albeit in a happy marriage, the lack of sexual feeling sounds very similar to that I experience at this time of life, so that was interesting to hear.

I'm Aromantic Asexual and a Solo Mum by Choice... I always knew this was my path from being super young... I just didn't have the knowledge about my sexuality and sperm donation until I was between 16 and 18... I have chronic illnesses and disabilities and was waiting for my health to be on a level where I could be a parent... I was housebound as a teenager so it was important to be in a place to give my child/children good lives... I knew i couldn't afford to use clinics so I went down the 'known' donor route... I was so lucky to find a decent donor with no weirdness especially with the legal risks that are involved... I started to conceive at 21 had 2 miscarriages and then got pregnant with my daughter at 22 and gave birth when I was 23... shes 2yrs old now and I couldn't be happier with my decision! I have had great responses from people about my situation and have met some amazing people who are also SMBCs in my area who ive become friends with 💚

long time subscriber of u both.. bryony made me feel better about my bad periods and helped me get used to the idea of menstrual cups.. thank you both

Thankyou for the recognition and love as a cycle breaker finding it hard. I've chosen not to have children, largely because of this, but I do have a beautiful niece I have to watch out for xxx

It sounds like I’m at a similar place on the romance/sexuality spectrums as Bryony, and I can really appreciate the idea of relationship timelines likely not matching family building timelines. While I’m not yet ready for kids myself, I am so grateful for the advice and to hear positive experiences of solo parenting (especially from someone on the ace spectrum!) ❤

She is such a powerhouse !

So funny to hear you talk about IVF not beeing fun, as I am just right in the middle of my third cycle of IVF. Will be going through the egg retrival maybe the day after tomorrow 😅

I'm donor conceived and have met lots and lots of donor conceived offspring who have differing feelings about their place in the world. I can't speak for all DCO, but I was raised to believe that biology has nothing to do with being a parent. It doesn't matter whose DNA made your children, you're the parent. I feel this way about my own family too. I think when kids are raised in a world where being DC, or raised in any kind of non nuclear or non biological family, is normal and healthy, they feel more secure in their identity. That's why it's so important to normalise and represent solo parents and donor conception!

@RealityFan-bb5ze

9 ай бұрын

If biology doesn't matter in becoming a parent why did your biological parent not just adopt instead of getting a donor? Or am I missing something

Fascinating interview! Really enjoyed it, even as someone who’s CIS, straight, no kids, and not in the UK 😂

So interesting, Bryony seems so cool 😊

This is such an important representation - great video!

Loved!

Love seeing you two together

"I've got a ticking time bomb in my butt, so let's have a baby!" Hannah Witton, 2021-ish 😆

Great collaboration 🙂

She's such a nice person!

I think you would both find the podcast ‘the retrievals’ by this American life to be VERY interesting. Content warning it’s quite heavy, about infertility and fertility treatments. It’s hugely about how we deal with women’s pain. Although intense, it is produced incredibly thoughtfully and felt important to listen to. It grapples with some difficult ethical questions, really contemplating the grey area. Loved this Hannah! 💜

Y'all are great moms.... blessings to you and your families

thank you for this video :)

I love this video so much

oh wow I lost track of Bryony after I used to watch her menstrual cup reviews. I had no idea she was ace but cool! I too am a grey ace mom. 💕💕

omg I used to watch Bryony's videos a lot years ago when I was looking for info on cloth pads and cups

Love this. Found this topic so SO interesting and insightful. This ahit needs to be showen in schools in Sex Ed

23>54!! Thank you for making this a part of the video!!! I HATE when people start talking about my baby's girlfriends, I always want to scream HE IS A BABY, STOP ADULTING HIM! 😡 Oh I hate that so much!

I love Bryony!

This video just reinforces for me how I could never be a solo parent haha. I would 100% need down time away from the kids and possibly some days to just rest by myself or go on a trip without kids. Solo parenting seems super difficult and major props to anyone who does it!

This was a very interesting video :) I love hearing other parents' experiences and different styles. I also love how it's becoming more common to use language that (hopefully) lets children know that they don't need to come out, that it's just a given that they are who they are.

I'm an ace single mom too! I'm kinky grey-ace, which for me means that I only experience sexual attraction in the context of specific fetishes and also have a very low libido overall. I'm also aromantic. My daughter is 1 year old (16 months) and was conceived using donor sperm - it took 5 IUIs. I'm also autistic and starting to suspect my daughter might be, too. I do know for sure that she's a very smart, verbally precocious girl who stims and hyperfocuses. It's amazing watching her learn and grow. 7:40 Regarding odd comments, I have very supportive parents who are eagerly coparenting with me, which is awesome, but the one downside was that on several occasions people have mistaken my dad for my husband, which makes me feel really awkward and grossed out whenever it happens. He is visibly much older than me so even if we weren't related it'd be a questionable age gap, and of course with him being actually my dad, yeah. I know it's an understandable mistake, but I wish people would be more careful about not making assumptions about the relationships between adults that are visibly coparenting because they're not always going to be a romantic couple. Also absolutely no one has mistaken my mom for my wife, so heteronormativity definitely plays a part in that assumption. And probably gender roles where people expect grandmas to be more involved in caregiving and supporting the pregnant person than grandpas will be. 11:08 Wow, 1000 pounds? Is that counting the sperm, or just the IUI itself? IUIs in Canada are like $100-200, but the sperm is a couple thousand if you're not using a known donor (which I didn't). 11:47 I have found baby-mommy groups welcoming, but I've always been the only one who has anything other than the traditional nuclear family structure and it kinda feels like I'm the token diverse parent in those groups. I'd love to try to connect with other parents raising kids in non-traditional families, especially once my daughter gets old enough to start noticing these things, but I haven't had the opportunity yet. 13:55 I draw a distinction between single vs solo parent too, but not the same as how you define the terms. I use single parent to refer to a parent who is not in a romantic relationship, and solo parent to reflect a parent who does not have anyone coparenting with them. I call consider myself a single parent but not a solo parent, because I coparent with my own parents. My baby basically has three parents - a mom, a grandma and a grandpa. And even though he doesn't live with us, her uncle is also a frequent caregiver to her. When people vent about how hard single parenting is, I can't relate, because it's never been all on me to look after my daughter. In fact I get more help with my baby than many married moms do! In fact I think some married moms are solo parents but not single parents, because they're doing *all* the parenting despite having a husband around.

@anna-ie5lk

9 ай бұрын

So interesting! Thank you for sharing your experience, as someone who knows I’ll have kids by a certain age regardless of relationships it’s so informative. I agree with your opinion of solo vs. single much more - I was raised by a “single” mum and had a dad who paid the minimum required child support but no other kind of parenting or presence was there from birth, and her experiences are much more relatable to “solo” parents than “single” - it’s completely different from coparenting which is what most “single” mums actually do.