Medical gaslighting should be considered a malpractice.

I had a general practitioner tell me, without examining me or asking any questions about specific symptoms or circumstances, that the pain in my leg was sciatica. She even used the phrase "I can tell you without even examining you." Not only did my symptoms not match, but a different treatment recommended by a new doctor actually helped immensely. If your doctor confidently has all the answers without even examining you, let alone asking follow up questions, it's a good sign you should go elsewhere.

@smashy_smasherton

7 ай бұрын

Sciatica is a description of pain in the leg and buttocks caused by nerve impingement, not a diagnosis. They tried that with me as well. Turns out I have a desiccated disc and need surgery.

@internationalentertainment6906

7 ай бұрын

❤❤THANKS 👍 KATIE FOR THE VIDEO, BECAUSE I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW MY BJC BEHAVIORIAL HEALTH SERVICES CASE WORKER HAS (** REPEATEDLY GASLIGHTS ME **)! BUT I KNOW WHEN SHE DOES IT. I CALLED HER ON IT... THEN SHE GETS MAD & ANGRT ..AND TRYS TO SAY I'M THE PROBLEM.😂🎉😂🎉😂🎉😂 SHE NEEDS PROFESSIONAL THERAPY HELP..... I HELP MYSELF

@jameshughes3014

7 ай бұрын

It's the worst when they act like they know without even looking.

@boop9430

7 ай бұрын

When I told my primary care physician I feel like I had pinworms because I’ve been feeling symptoms that match up for over a month she just said I was thinking too much and imagining things due to my history of anxiety. I didn’t buy it and after another few minutes of conversation she just said I probably have hemorrhoids without even checking anything and offered medication for hemorrhoids and a referral to a therapist. I switched to a different primary care physician last year.

@nansfam8534

5 күн бұрын

Best video ever on medical gaslighting. Going through it again... .

The story of my life. I was told I had a sore throat for more than 2 years while I was finally diagnosed with thyroid cancer with metastasis on my lymph nodes. I don't trust doctors any more but my instinct. If something doesn't feel right then it's not right.

@Nat524Ricci

4 ай бұрын

I agree fully. Pituitary and adrenal tumors (Cushings and pheochromacytoma) dismissed for 16 YEARS until I eventually self diagnosed and demanded a proper evaluation. Have genetic mutation causing all of it. Was sent to psychiatry for so many years. I despise doctors and will never trust any one of them!!!! I trust ME MYSELF AND I

@xenon6947

3 ай бұрын

I was imprisoned for 3 years for stealing cars when my Alter ego did it. Nobody believes me.

Story of my life. Rare disease endocrine tumor patient. But dismissed for 16 YEARS and told it was anxiety. Then I self diagnosed properly and demanded the proper workup. Two pituitary tumors, Cushings Disease and a pheochromacytoma in left adrenal. Due to very rare genetic mutation. Physicians these days are incompetent and incapable of doing their jobs. Period. I’ll NEVER be the same. I’ll NEVER trust anyone ever again. Early on in my illness I believed them, that it could be just anxiety etc. After some time it was very obvious that wasn’t the case and I’ve never even considered that to be a possibility ever since. Educating myself about my own condition is what saved my life ❤

Literally the story of my life. It took me until I was 27 to get diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, even though I’ve known since I was 12. Even with this diagnosis, as well as several GI diagnoses and endometriosis, I still get judged and gaslight. I’m “too young” to be on all these meds, I’m “too young” to be in this much pain. “Just wait til you’re my age and you’ll know what real pain is”. Doctors and medical staff think I’m drug seeking, that I’m overreacting, overweight, etc. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t receive adequate health care when I go to the ER. I’d go far as to say it’s malpractice. I don’t trust doctors anymore. I’m tired. I’m so tired of being in pain and ignored or judged because of it.

@gaelle4328

7 ай бұрын

Don’t know how it works where you live but can you block access to your papers and have a paper you can bring with.

@cptswann

7 ай бұрын

I've had the same experience with my mental health problems which it's starting to look like may be metabolic problems. I've gotten to the point of lashing out in anger and frustration at those who would try to gaslight me, which sadly is most people. It's very isolating.

@MissingScaffolding

7 ай бұрын

One of the main issues with EDS is that the EDS society isn’t lobbying for funding for diagnostics, so drs and gov disability are allowed to continue perpetuating the ableist and discriminatory belief that EDS is psychosomatic. The EDS society is fraudulent yet the whole community supports them blindly. They refused to acknowledge the RCCX polygenic theory and have failed to develop adequate diagnostics as a result.

@MommahKat

7 ай бұрын

I went through the same exact thing. It took me until I was 31 to finally get my EDS diagnosis and I am currently trying to see about if I have POTS and MCAD as well. The pcp I currently have has been the best one I've had so far but she still isn't great in some areas and I have to still push and advocate for myself which took me a long time to get used to doing. I also remember a time where I snapped the tendon in my ankle after it had dislocated and the ER doctors stopped taking me seriously the SECOND I told them I had chronic pain. They immediately wrote me off as someone seeking drugs because I had chronic pain and mentioned that at that point in my life OTC pain meds like ibuprofen and such didn't do anything for me anymore. I am at the point where I am completely unable to work but am struggling to apply for disability because of how painstakingly slow it has been to try and get diagnoses and how hard it is to apply for disability for EDS/POTS/etc to begin with. I wish you luck on your own medical journey, ZAB, and that you are able to get the medical care you need.

@ljwismer6028

4 ай бұрын

With my EDS it almost seems like the diagnosis automatically makes a provider dismiss me

I was constantly having throbbing headaches but my GP and neurologist told me it's hormonal. It eventually turned out to be a brain tumour. Some doctors questioned my medical history and didn't like my questions. "Surgery went well, what more do you want to know?!"

@bluefirekin

7 ай бұрын

I am so sorry you had to go through this 😢

@Clare059

7 ай бұрын

I had a similar problem, for years I had been having massive headaches just above my left temple area, but it was intermittent, I was told there didn’t appear to be a reason for it and my pain was written off as too difficult to sort out I guess. Earlier this year I had a serious episode of loss of balance so they did a scan only to find I had a largish tumour growing in my skull. No wonder I had been having so much pain, it had literally broken through the bone of my skull and was now pressing on my brain. I am now grateful for the loss of balance and a doctor who cared.

@aynilaa

7 ай бұрын

@@Clare059 Mine was above my right temple. When it got worse, I had similar symptoms but not all the time either. It was pressing against my optic nerve, which affected my vision. But migraines with auras have similar symptoms, so the doctors said it's that. And when it got removed in an emergency surgery, the doctor went "you really thought that was a migraine??"🤦🏻‍♀️

@jenniferlloyd9574

6 ай бұрын

@@aynilaa In the end, they'll blame the patient. Blame the patient for "complaining" too much. Blame the patient for bringing up the same "problem " over and over. Blame the patient for hurting or being sick "still". Once properly and _finally_ diagnosed, they'll blame the patient for not trying harder to get properly diagnosed or for "dismissing" their own "obvious" symptoms. "WHY DID YOU PUT OFF TREATMENT FOR SO LONG?!" Meanwhile, the white coats pull rank and band together to protect one another.

A nurse advocate told me how to talk with Doctors: 1. Tell no story 2. Give no statement about being overwhelmed, depressed, or anxious 3. State symptoms only 4. State your functioning (how you do with ADLs) 5. State pain levels 6. Tell about past surgeries 7. State allergies 8. FIRE any Dr that isn't listening to you.

@Melissa0774

7 ай бұрын

On point 1, how can you always tell no story? I mean, your full story is going to be in your medical records. If you've already been on the receiving end of the medical gaslighting somewhere else, that doctor could really screw you over by writing the wrong things on your chart. One bad apple can spoil the bunch. It's like that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine couldn't get any doctors to look at her rash because of how one of them wrote in her record that she was difficult.

@reghunt2487

6 ай бұрын

I've taken to printing out a sheet to take with me with surgeries and meds and allergies. And yeah, I agree with sticking to facts facts, not giving them some random event to grab onto.

@shaz4532

6 ай бұрын

I think your advice is spot on!👍🙏🇦🇺

@johngrimkowski598

Ай бұрын

yessssssssssssssss!

@timblock3483

Ай бұрын

Physicians can the worst narcissistic.

Thank you! I’m a US Veteran, trying to get some of that world class health care the VA boasts about. Literally EVERY care provider I’ve interacted with has been gaslighting me. I call them out on it too lol. You just solidified my belief that this is actually what is happening. I almost cried listening to this episode, but seriously, thank you so much for the work you do

@Axel-dy6qj

2 ай бұрын

I'm also a Vet and have had Doctors at the Kansas City VA hospital do this to me

Thank you so much - it feels like you know all of my experiences. Most recent one my doctor wanted me to change my blood pressure medication that I was taking for 20 years.SHe said there are better meds now. She was angry that I did not want to do it in the last few visits. Finally I agreed. I came back to the office to make sure I understood right. I asked if I just should stop the old meds. She barked at me "Yes!". I ended up in emergency and urgent care several times with extreme heart beat and higer blood pressure.. Finally after I looked it up online it said that abruptly stopping that medication can cause a heart attack. She was not happy when I came back to tell her that. Tried to blame it on me. Absolutely Gaslighting!!!

@annak4812

7 ай бұрын

Absolutely Gaslighting!!!!!

@Sunnyflower67

7 ай бұрын

@annak4812 That doc wanted to convince you that you can't follow simple instructions because otherwise, people would know that she's giving out incomplete or inaccurate information! It's empowering to let them know you are NOT falling for it. Unfortunately, what do you do when you need erroneous info taken off your record? 😮

Thank you Kati sooo much for giving this very important issue attention. As a chronic pain sufferer and other invisible illnesses, I cannot tell you how many times I've been through medical gaslighting. And worst I know I am not the only one out there, there are sooo many of us. In my case, it took me more than 22 years to get diagnosed with endometriosis (sadly very common!), 8 years with fibromyalgia (again very common - many doctors still don't believe such an illness exists), 18 years for a severe disc herniation in my neck (needing emergency surgery because I dismissed my pain because doctors did. It was from a gymnastics accident at age 13). But then I was lucky enough to meet truly AMAZING doctors, oh my, the kindest, sweetest, most patient people - ever! But sadly because of all the dismissal of doctors and me never pushing for answers, at age 45 I'm unable to work full time, I've had to stop traveling, doing sports, go out whenever I want etc. I'm home 90% at the time - 10% of the time I'm enjoying the stray cats of Istanbul, so grateful for their love. To everyone out there - stay strong!!! 💪❤😻

My wife was gaslit by doctors for about 15 years, being told things were "in her head." Finally, when she was 37 years old, she was diagnosed with M.S. We're both 56 now, and my wife has been in a wheelchair for over a decade. It turns out it was "in her head" but not in the way the doctors meant with all of the scleroses in her brain.

@aspeltaofkush3540

7 ай бұрын

That’s a damn shame. It’s amazing how much some doctors just sweep things under the rug without trying to properly examine or provide solutions.

I’ve noticed this more after turning about 60. I started keeping a medical journal and preparing for my appointment with notes from the journal. Also when I’m not getting an answer I’ve found it helpful to say “this is affecting my everyday life. What can I try to help? What other tests could be helpful? What is the next step?

The worst was when they told me in hospital "Well, you won't die from pain." and sent me home laying down in a transport ambulance without any medication or any help at all. This was 7,5 years ago after an infiltration destroyed my femoralis nerve and thus my live. I am in horrific pain since and I can't sit at all so I've been bedbound for years. I don't have the money to sue him so I only reported him to the medical board (in Germany) who dismissed the case because I couldn't come to an evaluation to the clinic on my own. Yes, because I'm fcuking bedbound ever since. They didn't care. They denied a transport ambulance or a home visit. Case dismissed. And I'm too sick to fight it.

@kasondaleigh

6 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry this is happening to you.

@ConnyWeirdWorld

6 ай бұрын

@@kasondaleigh Thank you 🙏

I am 80yo.. and I very clearly remember when doctors told women thst their menstrusl pain and discomfort was all in their heads,,, There were even articles written about it…

@jenniferlloyd9574

6 ай бұрын

Because most doctors were male. Funny how now they have a blue pill for an erection but still can't stop hot flashes.

It's so hard to read all the comments with similar experiences of medical gaslighting. It's so common all over the world.

This happened to my mom when she had to see an infectious disease doctor for some abdominal abscesses. From what she told me, he would tell her, in this very rude way, that her infection was self-inflicted...like as if she was purposely self-harming herself.

@jackilynpyzocha662

3 ай бұрын

An unacceptable, unprofessional attitude.

@CherylStruwe-tg6wo

3 ай бұрын

I have come to the point where if they don't have respect. I won't either. I've told my Surgeon we... The patients pay for their luxury holidays. Children's University Studies. I will rate them a Zero. We especially us women need to stand up its our health. What are we going to pretend for when we are paying a freaking fortune for an appointment. We are living in tough times . We don't have money to throw away. My husband pays R11.500.00 for a medical aid cover every month and our fees for these gaslighters can't be covered as they charge above rates. Thank you so much for letting me vent.

I gave my psychiatrist 4 pages of ADHD symptoms and he still decided to use Wellbutrin to treat my anxiety. I had an awful few months until thank god I got bumped up in my waitlist for a psych assessment and finally got diagnosed and now I’m getting treated…

@sounddilemma6474

7 ай бұрын

@@seesaw1502 yes Wellbutrin helped me. But also increased my anxiety massively. I’m now on stimulant and feel SO calm… I feel sad that I wasted 4 months on Wellbutrin especially I’m at a turning point of my life so it’s taken quite a big toll on me and my future career choice…

@Humbledone.

6 ай бұрын

I've been trying to get help since 2017...

@ReineDeLaSeine14

6 ай бұрын

I’m using Wellbutrin off label but if you already have severe anxiety…Wellbutrin isn’t the best first line pick for it. I’m glad your ADHD is finally getting treated.

@sounddilemma6474

6 ай бұрын

@@ReineDeLaSeine14 Thank you!!!

@sounddilemma6474

6 ай бұрын

@@Humbledone. Oh my goodness... I am so sorry about that. For me I realized that once I got my neuropsych assessment from a psychologist who's specialized in diagnosis it's a lot easier for me to find someone who wants to treat me. It's really upsetting that not all doctors are trained equal...

I'm so happy that this issue now has a name and that people are finally talking about it. I'm hopeful that maybe a real change will happen now. So many people talk about how the American medical system is so messed up because of the stuff that insurance companies do, ect, but I always felt like this medical gaslighting thing is the other half of the issue people don't talk about. I thought about starting a KZread channel about this stuff years ago in 2008. I was Sarah from the beginning of the video, back then. I had back pain that bad for seven years and guess what the problem was! I had a huge kidney stone. It started when I was 15. The first primary care doctor I saw got it in his head that the pain was coming from my hip for some reason, because I just happened purely by coincidence, to have a completely different issue going on with my hip on the day of the appointment, that wasn't a big deal and was totally unrelated. Then he ordered X rays, which didn't show anything. I'm not sure if it was because the stones were just overlooked, but I did find out I had scoliosis and I needed a full x ray because those first ones only showed segments of my back and shouldn't have been ordered that way. So then they started blaming the pain on the scoliosis. My primary care doctor sent me to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon who only spent less than a minute talking to me and didn't even touch me. I tried to tell him that the first doctor made a mistake on my chart and that the pain actually was in my back and not in my hip. He didn't even look at where I was pointing, when I tried to show him where it really hurt. He actually argued with me about it. He said the pain is reflecting up from my hip. I knew that was B.S, but he totally wouldn't listen. I told him no it's actually my back that hurts and not my hip, and you know what he said to me? "No it's your hip, that's what it says here." And he walked out of the room. I thought to myself, ARE YOU F-ING KIDDING ME? DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN? It was exactly like that Seinfeld episode where Elaine couldn't get any doctors to look at her rash because her first one wrote in her chart that she was difficult. He did an x ray in the office, which the stone should've been visible on, but it was missed again because I think no one really took the time to look at it properly. He also ordered an MRI to look at my spine and the huge stone was missed on that too. I went to physical therapy and a chiropractor. I switched to another primary care doctor after a few years and she told me that if those things didn't help then maybe I'll just have to learn to live with the pain. At that point I thought I must have idiopathic chronic neuropathy, (that weird nerve disorder where people have pain for no reason.) I'd pour over pictures in anatomy textbooks, wracking my brain trying to understand what structure in my body, pain in that spot on my back could possibly come from. Then finally, at age 22, I solved the mystery myself because I started having a distinctive type of nausea. It felt like the type of nausea I used to have when I had kidney stones before; my mouth would start watering and I'd get this salty taste that would make me wretch. I asked my pediatric gastroenterologist, who I'd been seeing regularly for ulcerative colitis, for many years, to get me a CT scan to check for kidney stones because of the nausea. (Not because of the pain. I still thought that was a completely separate, unrelated issue.) Turns out I had a huge stone in my kidney. It looked like a chicken egg. I saw a urologist and had it lithotripsied, (broken up into passable pieces with shockwaves,) a few weeks later and I've been fine ever since. Even then, I still didn't realize until I passed the stone a few days after the procedure, that that's what was actually causing the pain. Even though I'd had kidney stones two other times in the past, the other two times, the pain was bad enough that I had to go to the ER. I thought if the pain isn't making you scream uncontrollably, and almost pass out, then it must be something else. I'd always been told that kidney stone pain is worse than childbirth. But apparently, that's not always the case. Sometimes it can just be an 8 out of 10. If what happened to me isn't the very definition of medical gaslighting, then I don't know what is. I think the problem is that doctors don't have the time or the interest to get to know and care about people on a personal level anymore.

I was told verbatim “there’s nothing wrong with you” by a specialist after test results showed otherwise. I got fed up and boycotted doctors for yrs. After symptoms became worse I had no other choice but to go back to seeing doctors. 5yrs later, I was diagnosed with a rare condition. I was angry for yrs. But then I realized that doctors are people too. They don’t know everything and they make mistakes. My advice is to trust your gut and don’t give up like I did. Else you’re going to suffer much longer than you need to. Help is out there. You’re not crazy. Just keep fighting for yourself. 🙏🏻

Medical gaslighting is quite common in mental health (especially when psych meds---read: "treatment"---cause &/or aggravate symptoms; especially when adverse effects from psych meds r the root cause of the symptoms).

This is so good!! I’m saving it to a playlist I’ve been titled “how to adult”. I was never taught to advocate for myself as I learned from my mom how to always submit and defer to others. She died of cancer but it wasn’t diagnosed until she was already in her death bed. As I cleared out her home and belongings, she was CLEARLY trying to get answers from Drs for a LONG time but they just kept telling her to “lose weight” but it turns out her entire abdomen and lungs and all of her organs were absolutely filled with fluid producing tumors!!!

@carlyar5281

6 ай бұрын

Oh my goodness! I am so sorry you lost your mom that way. 💔 I am really glad that you are learning to advocate for yourself. ❤️‍🩹

@jenniferlloyd9574

6 ай бұрын

We really need to start contacting the doctors who dropped the balls. In the past, I've always taken my lumps and moved on. I think it's important that people send letters of proper diagnosis to doctors who've gaslit. In other words, "you told me it was nothing but it was actually something,"... Time to hold them accountable. Because they'll never know unless we do...

@idontknowyouthatsmypurse

6 ай бұрын

@@jenniferlloyd9574 YES!

I have faced most of this, after a car accident doctors dismissed the exacerbation of fibromyalgia pain! It was in my head he said, so I said “good” refer me for mental health practitioner’s that can help me with this! He did not do this and proceeded to yell at me, embarrassing me, his staff and other patients in waiting room! I found another doctor, luckily his sister had fibromyalgia and he helped me find ways to manage the pain and feel normal! Years of dealing with doctors who over medicate seniors and hate being questioned has made me tough, I refuse to take medication without a tested condition! I found out for myself that some blood pressure medications can screw up blood tests for diabetics, and insisted on seeing a doctor after Physicians Assistants keep experimenting on these medications! The doctor knew immediately which ones were appropriate! Thank you for your advice!

Thank you for highlighting this issue. It can be a very to toxic situation. They have the knowledge and thus the "power". We wait 6 to 9 months to see that specialist, the one we are told will be the help we need, only to be disappointed again. One tip might be to not put all your eggs in one Doctor's basket. Go ahead a make appointments with a few doctors, that way it's not another 6 months waiting for the next. Work smarter and you will feel more empowered.

I've been chronically ill for 10 years and I've experienced medical gaslighting a lot and also medical trauma. Unfortunately most doctors don't know my chronic illness so it took years till I got a diagnosis. And chronic pain is also mostly dismissed as psychosomatic. And when they find out you've got an actual psychological illness (in my case trauma and sometimes depression), then it gets even worse. My therapist even recommended not to tell them unless they explicitly ask. I hate that they always say it's psychosomatic if the standard tests don't show anything. Sometimes it's more complicated than that. I had to research myself to make them find what's wrong. I wish I studied medicine instead of English & Education 🙄 So I avoid going to doctors as much as possible and I will only see a hospital again if I'm unconscious. I'll never go there again voluntarily. But with a chronic illness you're dependent on doctors if you need medication or prescriptions for physiotherapy etc. I just wish to be healthy again 😢

@unapologeticallyamy9031

7 ай бұрын

I have gone through all of this too. Took 15 years for a diagnosis. The diagnosing doctor took 3 minutes to tell me what I had after spending hours and tens of thousands on doctors. Up until seeing her all docs said my disease was weight related, Or hygiene related which was a joke because I took very good care of myself, or it was due to cigarettes. I’d get quarantined for suspected MRSA despite having no infection. I haven’t seen a doctor in 3 years and I’m oddly in somewhat of a remission. I’m doing better now that I take no pain meds and no chemo type (immune suppressing) meds. Less pain, less disease activity. No painful procedures without pain meds. How often do docs use a scalpel on someone with lidocaine resistance and not give them a stronger numbing shot or a pill for pain? It happens a lot in America. My friends in England are put under anesthesia for these procedures.

Then the wonder why we self medicate!

Thanks for addressing this topic. I have experienced it personally. Plus I'd see it when going to the doctor with my 89 year old dad. It is aggravating. In my opinion the doctor either can't see the problem or if they can doesn't know any other solution so it must stress or old age or in our heads. And finding another doctor is hard with the doctor shortage.

Women experience this on the regular. I actually have a section written in the notes on my phone saying "if I die from any of my physical health issues-I tried telling Dr.'s, they refused to listen"

I believe Medical Gaslighting was done to me when I went to the A&E(ER) after a fall I had at work. I went there as i hurt my arm & my nose. My nose had been swollen the night that it happened, plus to this stay, I have pain in this same arm today. There was no xrays or anything done. The doctor said to me, that there doesn't seem to be any broken bones(as she felt my arm) and that my nose wasn't swollen when I know my own nose and it was swollen. She was afraid to touch me. I'm conscious enough bout my nose and when I seen that, I was near to panicking. As I said above, They never did any xrays or anything and jus told me to go home and take pain killers & ibuprofen. The other day I had another fall also hurting the same arm. So yes, I think the Doctor tried to Gaslight me that day.

This is a great, informative video. My mother was diagnosed with anxiety and prescribed Xanax while she was fighting stage III colon cancer, and I feel that was the point when doctors stopped taking her complaints seriously. Long-term complications from her surgery and other conditions caused her real pain, but she had to push hard to get these things investigated. It's as if once you have "anxiety" in your medical record, everything gets blamed on that.

I've been so mistreated by medical professionals when I had symptoms of a TIA, my pupils weren't responding to light and I couldn't speak or comprehend much speech. My mum later told me they accused me of being on drugs, I was 12 and never taken any drugs. Anyway, my mum didn't believe them but she didn't care about me enough to take care of me. I was left on the floor for what felt like hours, I was screaming and I couldn't move much but every position just felt like "numb discomfort?" if that makes sense. I still don't know what happened to me but it was the most traumatic event of my life and one that has made me completely lose all faith in any medical professional. I'd probably rather die if I get stabbed than call an ambulance. Doctors, why are you guys so dismissive and rude? Why do you not care about your patients?

Being overweight has led to me being medically gaslit, I have ankylosing spondylitis, osteoarthritis and non 24 which is incurable. It took me from the age of 18 until 30 to get a diagnosis, I’m now in pain 24/7 and practically disabled. The pain is always put down to weight, sadly my sleep disorder non24 was put down to be depressed and fat which I wasn’t, it wasn’t until I saw a neurologist in 2020 who said I have non24 which was so validating. I dread seeing drs now because I’m always made to feel like a fraud.

@lisamarie4048

7 ай бұрын

me too.. I still don't know whats wrong but I have been having some unusual symptoms and my doctor just blames my weight all the time... I feel afraid to question her actually - she looks very offended whenever I do as if I am questioning her professionality - but I know my body better thsn she does, right

@Sarahhedger

7 ай бұрын

@@lisamarie4048 my only advice is to keep seeing someone until you find the right dr. It’s hard because when drs say it’s good news there’s nothing wrong, it’s not good news because it completely invalidates the pain you’re going through. I used to be afraid of questioning them but now I’m not, it’s because I requested my medical records and found out they’d not told me certain things that showed up on scan reports. Your best bet is to keep diary’s of pain and go to appointments armed with evidence.

@Sunnyflower67

7 ай бұрын

​@@lisamarie4048 I'm assuming you can't get another doctor. *You need to find an advocate. If you can't take someone with you, try watching this video and read ALL THESE STORIES many times in the days leading up to your visit! Hopefully you'll be so angry, there'll be no room for fear. Also, you can write everything down that needs to be said, (which we should all do anyway) anticipate her response and write down what your answer back to her will be. You should never feel afraid to question a doctor. YOU'RE the one who's got to live with her decisions and go home with the symptoms after that appointment. I think the self-esteem issue is a huge part of it. I see it all over these comments even. Start practicing for next time. I've been there, so I know it's hard to prepare. It's sad that you have to. The hopeful part is we've got videos like these to empower us all.💪

@mrsjohnson1743

6 ай бұрын

The same here. My AS diagnosis finally came after I had to retire at 55 because of my pain and lack of sleep. Please consider meditation to help with your pain. Also, doctors won’t suggest this, but I know that medical cannabis has helped me greatly.

@Sarahhedger

6 ай бұрын

@@mrsjohnson1743 I have tried cannabis but it’s not legal in the UK, you can get it on prescription but it’s £250 a month. I have tramadol and codiene, which work ok but over the years I’ve had to up the dose so take way more to get the pain relief.

Having been a staunch advocate for the medical profession as a doctor, my perspective shifted dramatically when I fell ill. I deeply apologize to those abruptly interrupted mid-sentence, dismissed as merely "stressed," or reassured that their symptoms were likely just a medication side effect. I express heartfelt apologies for every instance you left a doctor's office with confusion. I seek to acknowledge and sincerely apologize for encounters with medical professionals who may have displayed arrogance, judgment, or laziness. Please know that you have a voice. There are various government-run organisations* that look after patient care. Please seek advice from them if you genuinely feel you had been gaslit or mistreated. It is not a common occurrence but it does happen. It ruins lives. * I am not from the US, so suggest to search online or to ask for more information from the clinic or hospital you attend. Be well 🌺

@shawnleong3605

6 ай бұрын

it often takes the doctors themselves to personally go through the pitfalls and tragedies of the system to know what we victims of medical gaslighting go through, which also haunts a lot of us day and night. I hope as a doctor, you fully know the responsibilities you are being given (as well as other doctors), and not abuse them. What goes around comes around, at the end of the day, doctors who malpractice (both intentionally and unintentionally) have to answer for their own actions.

I've been mostly lucky with medical staff, but have had a few docs be a bit dismissive & almost accusatory why my blood sugars were all over the place. Turned out it helps to have a doc be encouraging & willing to suggest adjustments to meds. But many friends have had horrid luck & they were in dire conditions by the time they got a doc that actually listened.

Omg my doctor did this to me when I told her I have depersonalization and derealization. She tried telling me I dunt know what I was saying. Now I know to tell my therapist because she's in trouble. She never offers solutions when I tell her my depression has been extremely severe this year.

First,thank you for talking about this topic because it is not talked about enough. Also i love your channel ,you provide great help and knowledge to us. Secondly, I had this experience Several times from more than one doctor. I have myasthenia gravis, which is a chronic illness. My Symptoms of the disease began in 2010 I noticed severe muscle weakness, sudden falls, paralysis, double vision, and strabismus. But the disease was not diagnosed until September 2014. During these years, I lost confidence in doctors and lost hope of getting a diagnosis for my condition, as they underestimated it “This is a symptom of depression", or "It is just in your head" or "Try Psychotherapy.” Even after I was diagnosed, one of the doctors told me that "You are the one causing these symptoms to yourself, stop!!" When he said that, I exploded in anger I couldn't control myself.

I wonder if medical gaslighting can also apply to therapists and their forms of gaslighting

@vladimirofsvalbard9477

7 ай бұрын

Well, the gaslighting usually comes from a sense of arrogance and God-powers that many medical professionals are being trained to do. I think you'll find that many of these people are simple (pill-salesmen). Honesty in the medical industry is complete gone and it only attracts the 'I'm just following orders' type of people these days. Anymore, people that actually want to learn and do 'good' want out after about 6 months, especially in nursing. The school of thought in medicine these days is that (all human conditions have been discovered and solved) to aid the public in suppressing the plights that humans have always suffered from. Ironically, humans have only been suffering from most of these medical issues for the past 50 years. The medical professionals think they know everything from school and that there's nothing else to learn. When in reality, they are a pawn for insurance and pharmaceutical greed.

@brooklynnychole

7 ай бұрын

@@vladimirofsvalbard9477 I agree. It’s unfortunate. People could suffer from health issues for years upon years.

I was told certain symptoms of a condition I have weren’t painful by a rheumatologist. When I said it says online that the symptoms are very painful she asked me why I was looking online and for who insinuating I had some sort of agenda despite only wanting to validate my experience. So many red flags I lost count.

In rural CA - there are little choices and trying to find a doc isn't always an option. What folks can do, is ask for a referral out of the area. Lots of malpractice up here, but no attorney will take that on, even if it costs someone's life.

It's the true PANDEMIC ...."profit over people" love that you're addressing this... It's critical that we trust ourselves ... after all we're the ones in our individual "SPACESUIT" never let anyone tell you what you're feeling or thinking .... the mere fact that YOU initiated the visit should be self-explanatory ... they did not call you‼‼ASK QUESTIONS‼‼

This is a great video. This has been my situation my whole life! I've been told with tumbling over side pain to go home and take care of my kids and pray. I tried another doctor for same issue and was dismissed as stupid. Then again for the same issue I was just scolded for getting off the table barefoot when he asked me to follow him. I took my health into. Y own hands and found that my functional Dr and those with integrated health got to the bottom of some of my issues and causing my chronic pain. This is way to often happening to to many people. I have more then what I'm writing of continuous gas lighting and contuinal issues that La dead me into surgery because a dr shoved my IUD INTO MY BODY AND LUT OF MY UTERUS! Kari thank you for your very valuable tips!

Holy crap this is so freaking validating.

Thank you for this video. Definitely experienced this again and again with relentless pain and discomfort.

Great subject Kati! Thanks for pointing out these Red Flags! 👌😊

I believe the reason is that many Dr.s want the title and the prestige not the work, responsibility, or empathy.

Sarah's story at 1:32 is exactly what happened to me one of several times I consulted a pain specialist doctor. I have had no other choice throughout the years (more than 20 years) but to learn to function the best that I can with very high levels of pain and many limitations because of my Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and severe TMJ disorders. When the doctor I saw to help me to find better medicines to treat my pain without harming my liver as I also suffer from an autoimmune disease of the bile ducts that is already harming my liver, he asked me to rate my pain level at worst on a scale from 1 to 10. I said that it can reach 9 during the worst times. He looked at me skeptically and explained that I would be screaming on the floor if I had 9 during the worst times. No, I'm so used to live in constant, chronic pain, that I don't react like that, it's not like labour pain (I also experienced that as well without any epidural) or when you hurt yourself badly and experience a sudden sharp and acute pain. Chronic pain is not the same as acute pain. When my pain level reaches a 9, I stay stoic if I'm not around people who know me well as I don't want to use my energy and increase the severe pain in my jaw to tell them what's happening to me, people don't undertstand so I keep quiet most of the time, I also feel suicidal and that I'm about to pass out when I reach a pain level of 8 or 9.

@carlyar5281

6 ай бұрын

Yup! I also have EDS. I was diagnosed three years ago at age 39. I’m so used to dealing with pain that when I broke my foot I walked on it… I broke my foot on two separate occasions. I don’t get worked up about really high pain. I laugh, until it gets really bad and then I go quiet. Two years ago I saw a hip surgeon about hip pain, I did not even rate that pain very high, but my hip wasn’t stable and I was affecting my ability to walk. I didn’t realize just how unstable my hip was. Neither did the surgeon until it subluxed during the exam. I fell over not once, but twice because I gave out on me. I just laughed when it happened because else can I do. 🤷‍♀️ It was probably the best thing though, because he saw it happen spontaneously and he saw my reaction. I never had to justify my pain with him after that. He truly is an angel. I wish all doctors were like him.

Medical gaslighting has lead a friend to being in a preventable terminal illness. I fired my previous practitioner when she ignored me (I think she was classist at least) when I brought up severe fatigue and this went on for more than a year. My next doctor referred me to endocrinology and I got tested; I have a hypoactive thyroid. I feel like I could write a book about it. I hate it.

From a doctor 4x, at Cleveland Clinic, you know, THE heart place: "You're a woman over 60. You need to be on 40mg of a statin." I've had no history of anything cardiac. I responded: "Without looking down, what is my name?" He couldn't answer. Thank goodness i continued researching and found a keto cardiologist. 2mg of pitavstatin. Brilliant.

@bellaluce7088

7 ай бұрын

I went to a Stanford cardiologist who was similarly myopic. Unfortunately, there are smart idiots everywhere.

I live in Finland. I have had the whole five red flags during the 25 years that I have lived here. I'm thinking that Finnish medical training includes a more substantial proportion of gaslighting skills and practice than it does anatomy and physiology! I have to pull some serious moves in GP surgeries for them to stop it: an example being continuous, intractible asthma. I was treated, very unsuccessfully mind, for asthma over a period of 18 or so years. Not a single treatment was efficaceous. This came to a head when I had a prolonged respiratory crisis - along with bilateral ankle œdema, hypertensive crisis, cardiomegaly, ascites build-up, dyspnœa on exertion. They gaslit me for a further two years, using very non-specific tests (I excelled at test theory in graduate school). Eventually, I had to make it so that my GP admitted that the tests (BNP levels, CXR and ECG) were not diagnostic ... which I then pointed out meant that they were useless for ruling a dx out. I got the cardiology referral. I didn't stop there. I'm a behaviour analyst - data rules everything. So I did an A-B reversal test for PEF, BP and PR, with multiple readings on PEF at five points on a shop walk (ADL relevance, right?). Using these data, I calculated mean arterial pressure and pulse pressure, as well as mean PEF with standard deviations. A was no meds. B was meds as usual. PEF readings showed no significant differences. The PRs and BPs, however, were vastly different between conditions. I had been so long on meds that the cardioprotective sartan I was on had reduced the cardiomegally. But the cardiologist then saw my results and her direction totally changed. She ordered up a lung function test. Normal limits in both conditions. I had never had asthma. It had been heart failure. Pretty unforgivable, no? It became clear that these people could not be trusted. I got labelled a troublesome patient for questioning them. Finland claims to have a world-class healthcare system. This experience says otherwise. Thank you for making this video. It was definitely a necessary one to make.

Very, very well done. The only additional event I wish you covered would be for doctors to coerce you into medical procedures as well, and then say, "well, you consented." This is also gaslighting and needs to be called out.

My most embarrassing doctor’s visit (because I had just dashed out of a class of teaching medical students) was when I made an appointment after 2 weeks of coughing because it had begun to hurt to breathe - and came away with a prescription for eye drops! Most recent was when I visited the doctor because, in addition to the arthritic hip joint pain I have experienced for several years now, I was increasingly bothered by muscle cramps. She changed my medication from a drug with a small antispasmodic effect to one with none at all, and effectively doubled the dose of painkillers. I just ended up thinking “Too hard - easier to put up with the muscle spasms”

Thank you for sharing this! I relate to it much.

Excellent video Kati!!!

Yes its an important topic Katie and it happens to alot of people world wide, my doctor has started this nonsense in the few years. Probably because i don't go to see her enough, i only go twice a year. Touch wood i don't get sick, but have a terrible back injury that I've been dealing with for 39 years, she knows I'm mentally strong.

I knew I had MS. Family NP blew me off as well as ER NP. Saw a new NP yesterday. Need to have a nerve test by an Internal MD. Finally someone listened! Im an RN and was totally frustrated by the 1st 2 Practitioners.

I have this all the time. It is so frustrating, humiliating and depressing. I had 3 herniated disk in my neck. My Neurologist kept telling me it was all in my head !! For 2 years I walked around thinking it was all in my head . Until I could no longer lift up my head. I made an appointment to see a Neurosurgeon he did the CT Scan and MRI. Asked me how long I have been walking around like that. I told him and he was appalled at the sight of my neck and the previous idiot I was booked in straight away. Had my operation done and today 8 years later I have never suffered a single ache or pain. I took my report threw it on the idiots desk, told him. " It's not all in my head "!!!! You were close though. It's in my Neck. His expression on his face told me to punch or be polite and leave. I chose the latter. My attitude has changed towards the Professionals now. I am straight.. to the point and if I do not get a decent answer after having to pay R3000.00 for an appointment. I report it to my Medical Aid and I refuse to pay. Please another thing. Once you tell them that you are suffering with Depression. Expect to be treated as a retard. 😠😠

I've been told to my face, more than once, by psychiatrists that I did not react to medications the way I say that I did or that I don't have the symptoms I'm telling them I have. I've had so many situations where doctors ignore me, or try to gaslight me , that finally after more than three decades, I just gave up. Not everyone has classic symptoms, or expresses them the same way, or reacts to medication exactly like most other people, but finding a psychiatrist who actually listens instead of 'explaining' like they're condescending to a child who takes my insurance is just.... not possible. And after decades of this, Now I have trouble talking to any kind of doctor. I just get so anxious before I go that I can't communicate because a lifetime of experience tells me, there's no point. they wont listen, even if its not always true.

Yes, exactly. I acquired many painful debilitating physical symptoms, went to the ER about 20 times with scary breathing difficulty and throat inflammation, 6 specialists, and finally ended up in the hospital weighing 85 lbs because it was painful to eat and food caused scary flare-ups of my symptoms. They ran all the tests and told me there was nothing wrong with me and that I was in perfect health. I desperately wanted help -- I had become bedridden and was on family medical leave. When I persisted that the symptoms were real and not in my head, they created a 200-page file at this teaching hospital where all the psychiatrists (about 20 of them) simply agreed with the Chief of Psychiatry that I was delusional, psychotic, had factitious disorder, somatic symptom disorder, anorexia, panic disorder, and was "very mentally ill" and not aware of my mental illness just because they couldn't find the root cause of my symptoms. I have no history whatsoever of any mental health issues. They went so far as to have me involuntarily committed and forced to take an antipsychotic. I couldn't believe this was happening to me. I was so incredibly physically ill, dry heaving day and night, double vision, hair falling out, could barely stand or walk, extremely dizzy with balance issues, chronic fatigue, etc. I looked very physically ill, but they ignored this because there were no test results. And 2 years later I finally received the correct dx of mold toxicity and mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS). But even after producing a truckload of evidence showing misdiagnosis and an unwarranted commitment, the medical board and hospital administration refused to expunge my records. And HHS does not allow medical or mental health records to be expunged no matter how wrong or damaging they are because they're official documents. Yes, I'll be fighting this with everything I have. It is common knowledge that medical schools do not teach chronic illness and that rare and chronic illnesses cannot be detected within the confines of traditional diagnostic testing and that folks who have rare and chronic illnesses are frequently accused of mental illness when no diagnosis can be discovered. This is a huge black hole in the psychiatry/HHS system that needs to be changed for people like me.

Thanks a lot for this video! ❤ 1. Yes 2. Yes 3. Yes, Religion - Frankly, I don't know, they didn't give a chance but the most recent doctor has written in the book that I was illumine(guess because of psychosis) and now an atheist(probably frustrated about that), should check in next appointment. 4. All in head, a former therapist said 5. Yes, they ignore it. I'm a Sri Lankan and I've seen these features in all of the psychiatrists I met. Some of them, shame us for figuring out alternative diagnoses or doubts. They prescribe the highest possible dosages often but doze off when we talk and interrupt. Should do something about this. I'm glad that you automatically answered one of my wishes. Thank You!!

I have no support & have been pushed away for yrs & I'm worse. Demanding answers when they don't know gets u no where. TOO MANY PATIENTS-NOT ENOUGH DOCTORS. THATS WHAT IT IS.

Thank you

Kati, you just described about every military doctor I saw as a dependent (wife). I've struggled with pain since my teen years and was always told everything was fine. When I married my Air Force husband I kept hoping to find some answers for my pain with military doctors. Sometimes they would do tests but most of the time I got, "Well we can't find anything wrong with you, but here, have some Motrin." It was either 600mg or 800mg, I guess whichever one they felt like offering that day. For those in the Air Force it's known as "Air Force candy" because its prescribed so often, especially to military wives like we're just neurotics who just want attention. I've also seen a lot of civilian doctors who weren't any better. When one military doctor diagnosed me as having fibromyalgia I thought it was new Air Force doctor speak for "hypochondriac". In fact, because I had gotten so used to dismissive doctors, even when I read up on fibromyalgia and realized it was a real thing, it took me years to deal with it. Still, I give credit to that doctor for showing me that there are some good doctors out there. They are just very few and very far between.

@carlyar5281

6 ай бұрын

I am a Canadian Air Force veteran and we used to call ibuprofen “vitamin I” 😂 they hand that stuff out like candy be up here too.

Be your own advocate!! I lost a kidney & my choice to have children because I had a doctor gaslight me! I was young & didn't know better but now I do!! One of the leading causes of infertility in women is due to misdiagnosed endometriosis!!!

@mem1701movies

7 ай бұрын

Sometimes you CAN’T be your own advocate because you feel so bad or can’t properly communicate

@cindot2520

7 ай бұрын

@@mem1701movies keep looking for a doctor who will listen!! Don't settle when it comes to your health!!

I think this is a huge issue that isn't recognized and is actually far larger than we can even imagine.

This was very helpful. Thank you

6. When they don't know the etiology of your symptoms and say "it's due to stress" 🙄

Great subject matter! It is a huge issue in Medical Industry. I would even categorize "medical care gaslighting" as learned behavioral trait that develops slowly. Beginning even in structure and information taught in graduate education programs & clinical residency. I personally believe this stems from the hold the pharmaceutical industry has on healthcare since 1910. When the Flexner Report was conducted for the American Medical Association and caused the shutting down of lots of medical schools, including all Naturopathy and holistic education facilities. Doctors since 1910, are taught to provide analysis from a profit-based vantage that bandaids not cures. It is also a taught mantra that "its never the medicine, it's always the patient for why something is not working". Lucky, not all doctors will live by that mantra. It is just as toxic as "the test results are normal, so you must be fine". Medical care also relies on deductive reasoning to find diagnosis, starting with the most common issue relating to causality/anatomy/pain. I would guesstimate over 90% of patients have no idea how to navigate doctor-patient dynamic. This includes how to have more conversations with correct descriptive terminology, cannot provide accurate medical history, do not know what questions to ask, will put up with terrible doctors or nurses instead of switching, or don't realize they can say NO or ask for 2nd opinions. It is so very important that people remember doctors, surgeons, nurses, & healthcare staff are people too! They are not almighty & all knowing authority. Your gut instinct knows when something isn't right or they are not a good person. Do not give your trust away so effortlessly, trust is earned. General Practitioners are usually on 15-20min windows per patient & specialists usually 30-40min windows per patient. If need-be, be the patient that causes the appointment to go over time limit because you are engaging with the doctor with quality questions & information. Just remember even if you are an informed patient, not all doctors will care to actually take care of patients. That is when you get a different doctor. IT IS YOUR BODY & ONLY YOU EXPERIENCE THE PAIN, THE EXAMS, THE SIDE EFFECTS, THE TESTING, THE STRESS & THE HEALING.

Just my two cents: When i told my psychiatrist that I had difficulty coming off my antidepressant, and even explained to him about the hyperbolic tapering that would help me instead of the linear tapering the psychiatric community always practices, he right up told me coldly and rudely that he was not comfortable seeing me, perhaps because I had too much of a say on HIS medical practice - apparently this is very common in the mental health community (I had previous psychiatrists who spoke rudely to me too). He thought I was challenging his authority - but the entire field was just experimenting drugs on me like a lab rat, an animal. Who knows what and how he twisted my words of defense in my records. It may not even be surprising that people are given additional diagnoses like BPD or ODD for firmly advocating for themselves. Given how mental health labels are highly malleable, it is extrmely disturbing and disgusting. I always have extreme disdain for psychiatry for polydrugging me over 13 years (with little transparency and honesty on their side), and how those practitoners always act with their holier-than-thou attitude, and that experience, compounded by the sentiments put forth by the antipsychiatry Reddit, confirmed that sentiment. I even read a comment on the main psychiatry reddit to ignore people like us, and that paycheck is all that matters. I am pro-mental health, but I am certainly anti-mainstream psychiatry. This is how far western, conventional medicine has descended, huh?

@carlyar5281

6 ай бұрын

I am pro mental health, and anti-psychiatry! I think that in the modern era psychiatry has lost its way. Between Neurology/neuroscience and psychology, pretty much everything is covered. Psychiatry is holding onto the drugs for mental health and that’s pretty much all their purpose now.

@AnnaBreit

6 ай бұрын

My personal examples of medical gaslighting are exclusively from mental health providers. I just talked about 2 experiences above.

I used to print off my sources for my medical research. Having to research my condition and become an expert in how it affects me is part of the reason why I became a librarian. I once even had to see a specialist in somatoform disorders because I was misdiagnosed with one…and the people who misdiagnosed me didn’t even listen to him.

Oh my gosh... I had all of these happen with a doctor but I didn't know what it was, I was a minor with severe pain. By the time I was an adult it had grown so bad I needed emergency surgery

Mental health medical gaslighting is also a thing. I was told by therapist after therapist that there was no way I was autistic. I was too “high functioning”, too sociable, too “normal”. Same with ADHD. Because women and girls with ADHD tend to have different symptoms than boys and men. We tend to internalize, self criticize, and wonder what’s wrong with us. Shoot, I was even told I couldn’t have PTSD because even though I tried to end myself, I wasn’t close enough to death. It took me into my late adulthood, a masters in social work, and a lot of self advocacy to get the diagnoses I already knew I had.

I have chronic illnesses for which I always thought was a good idea to have support from a psychotherapist. Sadly, my last psychiatrist tried to gaslight me several times. Every time he tried, I would say "this is not what I said, you're interpreting" or "No, this is not what I'm experiencing". Then he would apologize by saying the patient is always right but it always sounded fake. The last straw was when he said "I can tell you, you don't have anything, you're just depressed" . Huge red flag, since he never had any of my medical chart in hand nor any imaging, we only talked. Then he proceeded to say that the genetic disorder I might have was invented anyway. I told him to go educate himself because as far as I know (I'm a therapist too, different modality and not a doctor) depressed mood can exacerbate pain but didn't create my congenital muscoloskeletal malformations. I never believed his BS but I'm a bit annoyed at myself that I let him try several times before "politely" telling him to F off with his somatic disorder crap diagnosis. That said, I'm glad it came this far and I could tell him how invalidating his words were. I don't know if it will make a difference in the care of any other patients he might have with chronic illnesses, but I tried.

This is great! This happens to me all the time!

3 years of extreme symptoms. Now I am going through speed up investigations for ovarian cancer.

Yes! I have experienced over the last 15 years.

thank you!

Well articulated.

3 drs and 4 years of pain trying to get an endometriosis diagnosis. One dr told me i just "was prone to cysts" and brushed me away. Finally got the laparoscopy i wanted yesterday and already seeing positive results!

my aunt who passed from cancer first went to her dr complaining of severe constant shoulder pain. Dr told her go get physio and offered no tests, my mom told her to go back and demand an x-ray. Turned out her shoulder was eaten away by cancer.

This just happened to me too. My doctor was on vacation and the replacement was an arrogant twat who argued with me about semantics regarding my pain. She recommended the DMV take away my drivers license before a diagnosis of anything, even though I told her that I’m bipolar and homeless and living out of my car. A lazy, stupid doctor who did not even try to help.

Feels like you are telling my story. I have fibromyalgia. Thank you ❤

I had my mental health issues dismissed, because I wasn't struggling all the time, just occasionally. Plus, I didn't have a diagnosis (that I knew), so while I could describe my symptoms, I couldn't tell why I have them, or why they fluctuate all the time. "it's all good now, don't worry, it's unlikely to return" was ironically the most helpful advice, some professionals told me to change my sexuality, or give up being multilingual. Or just told me that my anxiety is irrational, so stop being nervous. I found out that I was diagnosed with adhd when I started school, and my parents were reassured that I wouldn't need any help with it. Which is why they kept telling me that seeking mental health support was a waste of time.

❤❤❤I HOLD THE POWER TO ASK FOR A DIFFERENT DR., THERAPIST,CASE WORKER,ETC...

I'm feeling a bit, uh, directly spoken to. Ankylosing Spondylitis for me! Not diagnosed until 39.

This literally happened to me when i was first dionoised with pcos i had to get a complete new doctor

I definitely am pushy. Had to for my mother this week. I finally got her home today. Had to adress alot of things! I am a retired nurse. But i experienced this in my life and the Doctors got called out big time. Anyway, always call on an advocate! When you feel its not right and also when you are spoken to in a disrespectful way or anything like that walk out and find someone else! Good doctors will say if they feel that a specialist may need to check more into things and refer to a reputable Doctor then thats good if it seems that they are really listening and care.

I didn't even know that this terminology existed until this video, but that's exactly the situation which I was in many many times while trying to find reasonable explanations for a specific health condition. The experience with these doctors can be very frustrating and upsetting.

My entire adult life my pain has been ignored and dismissed. I'm so angry and so tired and I cry after every pain doctor appointment. I'm trying super hard not to be combative, but when they treat me like a stupid child, I don't know what other way to be, but I'm expected to have an infinite well of patience and goodwill for someone who doesn't care if I live or not.

My doctor told me that many people have the same thing and they would never consider nothing a doctor with it. After seeing another I was finally , 2 years later, diagnosed with MS. That presented another can of worms.

This was great! I've seen all of this so many times. I'd love to hear what you think the reasons are for this behavior. Is it laziness, money, legal concerns, callousness? I respect a doctor's education and experience, but often instead of a medical professional, I feel like I'm talking to a amateur lawyer.

Went through this for years... Now i say to all new doctor's ( who i do not trust like i once did) up front Do Not Gaslight Me if you do...i will walk out! Doctors do not want to hear that and they start to listen. Just be honest be powerful right in their Face. You will be heard i waited 25 years and we as women deserve better right?!!!!

These automated phone systems are so frustrating, waiting almost ten to twenty minutes, and only get a minute or two with the doctor or his staff. And then, they are rush to get off the phone. If I explain, in a clear, concise way, using examples, they are less likely to do this "medical gaslighting"!

I went bankrupt many years ago due to bills because i was sick. I indeed was sick but they said repeatedly nothing wrong. Welp, 1 month ago i was diagnosed CPTSD it blows my mind no doctors ever diagnosed me properly when i was honest about everything took 30+ years. Now im dealing with Infidelity because i caused him to cheat

I am finding that my self esteem is so important in the gaslighting. Your explanation as to how it works is great. It brings chills to remember how low mine was before recovery and the emotional pain I lived with. Even if I tried to challenge them, I couldn’t sustain myself. So much depends on the personality of the person(s) you are dealing with and where I am in my own mental health.

I just found your channel… great video. I feel abused by everyone that’s supposed to help me. It’s getting worse and I’ve been dealing with this for 11 years. How can I get help? I have no family or friends because of narcissistic abuse by my ex. There’s also Parental Alienation Syndrome, I haven’t seen my kids in years. I was just trying to protect them and now I don’t know what to do anymore.

This happened to me for years. Constant back, neck pain that eventually turned into hip, knee, and elbow pain. I was told to exercise and lose weight. Without asking me what my diet or activity was. I finally refused to leave until he ran blood work. I had a +ANA, +autoimmune disease. Final dx from Rheumatologist, Ankylosing Spondylitis. No cure, but damage could have been slowed down if dx earlier. Now I have multiple doctors, and I make sure they all know what happened to me. It's been hard to trust them!

I freaking hate it when I go for a medical treatment & they ask me to rate my symptoms on a scale of 1 to 10, whether it's pain, depression, anxiety, whatever. If I say too low they'll think it's not a real problem, if I say too high they'll think I'm a drama queen. They define ten as the worst pain you've ever felt. How does that communicate anything to them? They don't know my full history. Maybe the worst pain I've ever been through was a breech birth with no drugs. In that case, I might rate the pain of the compound fracture of my leg as a 3. Maybe the worst pain I've ever had was a hangnail. In that case, my dislocated finger would probably be a 12.

Medical Gaslighting was the standard procedure during covid. No joke.

I have a rare spinal condition called Klippel-Feil Syndrome which I've had 10 cervical spine surgeries for (not pain relief) but for stability. And a meningioma brain tumor that was causing severe headaches, migraines, facial swelling and eye pain. I was put on a low dose pain medication over 20 years ago...then, my new ARNP told me (whose husband sadly died from a brain tumor) that "we only use pain medication in cancer patients. " Also, in the same clinic, I saw the therapist for my C-PTSD and depression. I was working with her for almost 2 years and she said something (no matter if I was projecting or not; I AM THE PATIENT), That in the session i just couldn't speak. She asked me if I was going to commit suicide! Then, i tried to just let her know through mycharts (my only option). That i was having a really difficult time getting over what she said and I couldn't see my way back to an appointment. I never heard from her!!! I had to say, it's me, I will find someone else and will find my own prescriber. Isn’t that illegal????

The medical gaslighting has gotten so bad that I've started to gaslight myself into thinking my pain isn't serious even though it definitely has impacted my life significantly. I hope a new generation of doctors can start to realize that this practice seriously harms patients.

Kati, when you did your degree did you complete a thesis? I am also wondering what made you want to choose the MFT path in particular. I am interested in going into the field. I have seen videos where you break down the different kinds of therapists but I don’t know if you have spoken about why MFT in particular.