The 2 essential skills you need for great conversations
Good conversation starts not with others but with YOU. You have the power to bring out the good in others with your energy and empathy. In this conversation skills video, we will talk about how to create interesting conversations using a combination of energy and empathy. I'll teach you some questions you can ask to make others get excited and interested in conversing with you. We will also talk about what to do when someone loses interest or talks down to you. Watch the lesson to improve your conversational skills and become the person everyone wants to talk with.
Take the quiz to make sure you understood the lesson: www.engvid.com/2-essential-sk...
Watch these other videos I've done on conversation skills to take it to the next level:
How to start a conversation: What to say after hello:
• How to start a convers...
How to use W5 questions for better conversations:
• How to use W5 question...
How to STEAL a conversation:
• Conversation Skills - ...
TRANSCRIPT
Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo. Oh, hi. James from engVid. Today I wanted to talk to you about two tips on conversation. These tips I think can have you... Help you have an amazing conversation, make you really interesting... Actually, make people really interested in you so you can keep having conversation. After all, it's the practice that we need to get better, and if people don't want to talk to you, you can't improve.
So quickly we'll go to the board and you'll see Mr. E has boxing gloves, and it says: "1, 2". In boxing, the "old one-two" is a jab and a straight punch. Why? It's very effective and it gets the job quickly done so you can take out your opponent. In this case, what I want to do is teach you two things that you can use in combination to make people you speak to enjoy the conversation with you, want to practice more, or talk to you more so you get more practice. Are you ready? Let's go to the board.
So, how to knock them out with killer conversation tips, 1 and 2. For most people when they're practicing or when they want to improve conversation, they think: "I need to talk a lot because if I get to talk a lot I'll get better." That's 50% of the equation, because in any conversation there's the speaker and the listener, and both parts must be worked on, because if you have a healthy balance the person who is listening to you will want you to continue, but usually they want to speak as well.
In a lot of conversations, something that will make a conversation go well is empathy, which "empathy" means: "I understand what you're saying. I also want to know how you feel." Another part of it is energy, people want to be excited. Nobody wants to talk to a person who talks like this on the whole subject, it wants... It makes them want to stop talking to you. That energy or lack of energy can be on your part or their part. In this lesson I want to address both things, empathy and energy, to teach you how to raise the energy in a conversation if it's low; and teach you empathy, how to feel or get them to feel in the conversation so they care, because if they care, they share. Are you ready? Let's go to the board.
Let's talk about empathy. One of the biggest parts of a conversation is empathy. When a person cares about the conversation, they stay in it, they're excited about it, so it's one way to raise energy. A lot of times when we're talking we make the mistake of thinking: "Okay, well, I've got a lot to tell people", and we get excited, so we have a lot of energy, you're talking about: "I got a new car the other day. It's an amazing car. It's got, like, bucket seats. The seats warm up in the winter. Canada's cold. The steering wheel warms up. I got a really good price on it. I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I..." the magic "I". Now, it's good for me because I get to say: "I", see? Me and I, but for a listener it gets boring because they're like: "Ah, ah". They want to talk. So a way to change that around, you might say: "Well, I'll just use 'you'. I'll say: 'How about you? You, you, you'". That's okay, that's a good start, putting it on them.
But if you want to show empathy to get them interested in the conversation, what you might want to say is one of two sentences I will show you now because when you say these sentences it makes the person know you care about them, not just about you. And in inviting them to speak about something gives them the opportunity to put their opinion in, so no matter how the conversation goes, they will remember that they were part of a conversation, not a lecture where you just spoke about you. And they will also probably remember the conversation in a more positive way, which means later on they'll want to talk to you. […]
Пікірлер: 350
James, I'm a native speaker but I watch these videos anyway because you're extremely engaging and possess a unique fashion sense. You're mannerisms and body language go far in drawing people in and keeping people watching! Cheers
@micah-jonathancole2063
5 жыл бұрын
I am also a native speaker but still watch as well XD
@crazypatrickteacher
5 жыл бұрын
I'm an ESL/EFL tutor and I also enjoy watching James, or having him on in the background while I'm doing prep.
This video is not necessarily about making conversations in English, but in any language. It makes you develop your character and be generally a better person! Superb video, I'm ravenous for more!
@kanodourden
5 жыл бұрын
And gain world domination!
@damianxxx3118
4 жыл бұрын
Hey that's exactly what I thought hee
@Galdring
3 жыл бұрын
Haha, great job avoiding "very"!
@juniorhernandez3014
2 жыл бұрын
That was what I just say to myself and also is the fisrt comment xD
@abigaelkourouma4249
2 жыл бұрын
Je u 67hu00à vous 6
I’M STILL RAVENOUS!
@ramazankenbaev5640
6 жыл бұрын
😂
@satorugojo5953
5 жыл бұрын
Very very very very very revenous
@hypeman6598
5 жыл бұрын
Don't be dull
@ariesariesfearless4810
5 жыл бұрын
Hahhahhhaaahaha
That's actually a good lesson for any given language. I completely agree with how frustrating it is to be unable to speak because someone is constantly speaking.
I've always felt hurt and worthless because at work people talk down to me as my tong get tight since I got a poor education background but I'm doing my best to change their opinion and gain the respect that I deserve. Thanks a lot for all the lifetime lessons you provide us.
@zuhairyassin505
6 жыл бұрын
Hanna Nice hang in there you can do it plus its fun to see yourself developing and the work is paying you
@aestheticallypleasingaesth8941
6 жыл бұрын
Hanna Nice Don’t feel worthless! We are all worth equally no matter what! Keep up the good work! 👍 :)
@sanra167
5 жыл бұрын
Hey, thank you for sharing this. I feel the same way. That’s why I’m here too
@syedsnake9801
5 жыл бұрын
Hey so i Have felt this in the past but i overcome it ,became confident and made a lot of friends..Coming from a guy,i find most people not to judge you from your background,dont worry
@saibhargav6474
5 жыл бұрын
Dont bother u dont obviously have humble persons rather surrounded self centred narcs ( if my vocabulary is grammaticallly wrong. Plz do comment)
Hello Sir ! My name is AMIT KUMAR. I'm from India. First of all I want to thank you for your kind EFFORT to teach people English. I like the way you teach. It's quite impressive . I want you to make videos on homonyms, homophones and root words.
This man has so much energy and positivity in him to share with you people. One of the best English teacher I’ve ever had and honestly you can’t get bored around him. KEEP WATCHING HIS VIDEOS!!!
James you are one of the BEST teachers I have seen in my whole life!!!! Greetings from Madrid, Spain.
I frequently rag on James, but I have to admit he does a many things that will help you with your conversations. First notice he dresses well, So one thing to take is that you want to bring your best self forward. He is dress dapper. Two he is wearing a bow, while traditionally people-wear is a tie, a bow can be used as an ice breaker in a conversation. It helps other open up to you by acting as a conversation piece. Thirds thing is the empathy, instead of just saying aaahh you can invite them continue talking by asking them questions. The fourth thing that James does is hand gestures. The gestures are not over powering and flow with his tone of voice and hence make the conversation more lively. Five knowing how to subtlety change your voices tone. I do disagree on one point is the use of "OK" or "And" because tone of voice is crucial, if you say ok with the wrong tone it can come off as sarcastic. If you are unsure if your tone for OK is sarcastic or leading, then it better to not use OK and follow up with a positive leading question. Follow these sets and you will come off as charismatic. Remember too smile subtlety too, Like James does in his videos. Compare James to the others on engvid notice that the others are uncharismatic and one could easily argue extremely dull.
Sir, you are so charismatic! I absolutely love you!
I am from Brazil and I’ve been here 4y now and you have helped me so much. I can’t thank you enough. You are amazing. Thank you very much. I have learned a lot with you. My vocabulary is getting better every day.
The joy of learning English by James ESL!
again a fabulous video by a fabulous teacher in a fabulous way!!! Love the way you teach. Keep it up and thanx for such a useful information.
Man, you are the best teacher ever! I like the way you teach us. Every time I watch your videos I feel like I'm with my close friend so thank you for being friendly and such a cool English master 👍👍👍
You're an amazing teacher ,how to keep a conversation , simply a genius.
OMG I’m so glad I found you on KZread. I live in Ireland more then 5 years and my English is useless. I’m so glad that I found you on KZread and I can improve now. I’m learning a lot with u. Thank u for your effort and time.
I tried to watch several channels no one is like you !! You are the best ever
Cool lesson its not just English it's culture of the English language:D
This video is perfect! It will help me a lot with my upcoming speaking exam. Thank you, James! By the way, nice bow tie 😊
@holidayharden8032
6 жыл бұрын
Kendrick Harrison maybe the oral English test lol 😂
@gabeenkhan4470
6 жыл бұрын
if you want to improve your English contact me . i can help you
@holidayharden8032
6 жыл бұрын
Kendrick Harrison Actually nowadays China's Education Government pay more attention to the oral English. Although there is no doubts that the English grammar plays an important role in learning English, more and more Chinese would like to speak English as fluent as we can.
@PamelaPalmaM
6 жыл бұрын
Kendrick Harrison I'm taking the CPE for academic and professional purposes. Most universities and enterprises want their students and employees to be fluent in English.
@PamelaPalmaM
6 жыл бұрын
Kendrick Harrison Yes! I received a notification from KZread, but don't worry about that, it's not a big deal 😊
You’re the best teacher ever ! Thank you for these useful videos
I enjoy a lot your lessons and also the way you do it. You're such a great teacher. I'm so jubilant of everything I've learnt from you.
This is so far my favourite class
Thanks to all the high power, you’re helping a lot
Thanks for sharing your ideas about conversations. They are very helpful.
Superb your lesson for us! Thank you teacher JAMES! From Japan
Thanks again, James! Perfect class!!!
The way you are delivering things directly those came in my mind superb. Your way of teaching is really admirable!
You're the best, thanks for doing this video for us. I consider it will be favorable and effective.
Hahahaha ☺ Excellent excellent lesson james! Love your drawing .You have such a versatile personality. ❤😊
What a great dude you are.. you taught me a lot thank God you exist!
it's very importent Big Thanks!!!
I absolutely love your work sir….thank you
THANK YOU SIR...you are superb.
James thank you for sharing! This really helped me in real life You're so wise
Great video for both foreigners and natives
Thank you for this lesson...you are amazing!
T.James... You are the besssst... And I jst like the way that u r teaching us by... So keep the great work up
Great video James thank you so much! You are my favorite one
You are energetic teacher. I like to watch your videos) It's best of the best of english lessons. Thank you very match)
You are very intelligent and handsome teacher! Thank you very much for your lessons!!!🌷🌷🌷
Hi,I am Brazilian and I learn so much with your videos,you are a great teacher
It is not just an english lesson, but a life lesson :)
I have learned many things from these talks and I was born and raised in the U.S. Interesting! Thank you.
You add so much value. I like watching ur videos. You are the best of d best and the heavy weight with sense of humour 💯👌
oh my, why havent I found YOU earlier?? Thank you for what you do! such precious information!
Thanks teacher this is best video I ever watch because sometime people who speak English fluently they don’t want have much talk
Excellent lesson sir it was really superb I learned an extensive amount only from watching your videos for a couple minutes! You are really a great help for me , and I honestly haven’t been much into improving on things such as my speech and use of vocabulary till now. Watching your videos really motivate me to learn more on this😊 , this is especially helpful for me do to the fact that I want to write books! And in fact I am trying to work on one now(just for fun) your videos couldn’t be more on time! for me as I only just started getting into writing.
You are the maaaaan bro, thank you
This video let me to know more more things ...thanks my best teacher
i'm going to learn a lot with your videos, thanks james,you are amazing for do this.
Excellent tips! Great lesson, as usual. Thanks.
Hi James, I am trying an practicing to put right energy and empathy together to have a good conversation. Having a good converstion is a big concern for me. I am sure my manager seems disinterested in conversation with me. Thanks
You are an amazing teacher. I also want to learn about using "have" in conversations from you. İt's a very confusing subject for me
Wow! this is the first time that I watch your videos, you are amazing! I really want to learn with you and I'll follow your videos
Thank you for share your knowledge! and your advises I'm sure all of them are gonna be really usefull! Cheers!
Danke Shön James !Thank you James you are cool teacher. I hope we'll see more videos as soon as it possible!
Thank you for this James!
That's a lesson for life! There's so many people that don't hear anyone in their native language hence they do that speaking any idiom. Very annoying and disrespectful ones... /
Thank you so much James!
OMG, My favorite channel
Nice intro, Man. By the way, You look great in that clothes Master.
Excellent channel
What u r teaching is very imp. We seldom think about this.
YOUR LESSONS ARE SUPERB...
You are awesome teacher
Teacher, because of your excellent explanation my score was 10. Thank you.
I love all your videos. Excellent tips to improve my English!
I'm already used to put the thumb up before watching James's videos, 'cause I know they all are gonna be interesting :)
Thanks for you're lesson. It helps me a lot.
Thanks Mr. JamesESL
Thanks for this lesson thank you very much very interesting from Brazil 🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷👍😎
I really like the way you teach, I feel more comfortable when I speak in English with my friends. Thanks so much :)
Excellent tips, I'll apply these pointers in the future. Thanks
Your face in the title image is priceless, James. I also agree with everyone about your shirt!
thank you professor you're the best ✌watching u from Morocco.
i can keep listening to your voice again and again. Good job~ thanks a lot. great content , understandable accent.
You are my best teacher!!
James thank you a lot, great lesson, by the way I'm brazilian and got all the phrases.
thank you james, such a nice lesson and a great teacher
Thank you so much man❤️Your videos are really helpful
Thank you, We appreciate the effort you take to assist us with improving our vocabulary! 🤩❤😍♾💯 New subscriber♾
Perfect!!!
This videos help me to improve my engish. Thank you!!
Sir, that lesson was so interesting thank you very much and I appreciate that.
Really helpful video James, thank you and have a great day! I'm ravenous for more!
Wow! I feel so blessed because I discovered you on youtube, your videos are really useful and superb xD,. Thank you so much to share all these lessons with us. :)
This video is so helpful and of course he is a great teacher 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
I live in France and i completely love what you do
Thank you, James, for sharing the tips. It will help me in making better videos for my channel as well as for my upcoming exams. :):)
Thank you for this video!
Que bacana professor. Suas aulas são demais. Estou falando do Brasil, São Paulo. I love it. kiss
thank you its pleasure to learn with you.
Thanks....a pleasure.
Excellent teacher.
Okay?! You impressed me,sir!!!Thanks a lot! Okay?!))
Love your lessons 🥺♥️thanks you
Thank you brother!
Great as always !!!
you are a perfect teacher
Thank you dear *Sir*