Hello! I am a representative from the Hague, and would like to have a chat with you!

@Kelchjr23

5 жыл бұрын

The Austrians cant save you now

@theatagamer90

5 жыл бұрын

Don't worry Vale. They can't accuse you if the representative disappears! *Aims Flamethrower with malicious intent*

@manofsemantics7936

5 жыл бұрын

It’s treason then.

@thehague8148

5 жыл бұрын

Excuse me? We want to have a word *with you* now.

@gamingwithchase3903

5 жыл бұрын

They can’t hurt you if the gauge ceased existence

“Time to do something I have never done before “ are you gonna follow the Geneva convention?

@behindthesmile1276

5 жыл бұрын

That's more like the last thing he will ever do

@Someone-lr6gu

5 жыл бұрын

You dont have to follow the Geneva convention if there is no Geneva.

@Valefisk

5 жыл бұрын

lmao no way, how on earth could I function if I followed it

@omegaentertainment01

5 жыл бұрын

@@Valefisk Agreed, especially considering that the game isn't set *on* Earth at all.

@ShiningDarknes

5 жыл бұрын

Are you going to actually garrison your bases?

Riot police, red colors, accent, scorched earth tactics, weapons of mass desctrution. This reminds me of something, hmmm...

@AntonsVoice

5 жыл бұрын

Russians

@andrew-paulclements1502

5 жыл бұрын

Imperium of Man on a Good Day

@sponge1234ify

5 жыл бұрын

Best Korea?

@paladinboyd1228

5 жыл бұрын

Космический Кисик, The fire nation?

@xdxchuckles

5 жыл бұрын

URRRAAA

Remember Ladies and Gentlemen. The Geneva Convention doesn’t apply to A: Outer-space and B: Non-humans

@math3000

5 жыл бұрын

C: The Winners

@SaberTask

5 жыл бұрын

D: The FitnessGram Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal bodeboop. A sing lap should be completed every time you hear this sound. ding Remember to run in a straight line and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark. Get ready!… Start.

@jrmorrow2

5 жыл бұрын

Don't Exist: you just triggered my PTSD, thanks

@SaberTask

5 жыл бұрын

@@jrmorrow2 You're welcome. lol

@AHoardyBoi

4 жыл бұрын

Don't Exist NO... NOT AGAIN.

"I wasn't expecting Immortan Joe to tame Smaug..." Now there's a movie I'd watch.

@thescottsman1996

5 жыл бұрын

WITNESS!!!

@orichalxis7932

5 жыл бұрын

*I SHALL RIDE ETERNAL! SHINY AND CHROME!!!!*

Valefisk: "We saved the city from the disgusting Xenos!" The City: On Fire

@acewolfgang276

5 жыл бұрын

We did it Patrick! We saved the city!

@sirmitri6666

5 жыл бұрын

Welcome, to Warhammer 40K

@darkposidon5464

5 жыл бұрын

I am glad to see a 40k joke and also Death to the imperium

@sirmitri6666

5 жыл бұрын

@@darkposidon5464 GLORY TO THE EMPIRE, PUEGE THE XENOS

@Josh-mk7ok

4 жыл бұрын

Is valefisk related to the mother of dragons?

I hope you get more sponsorships from Paradox. They are kinda *the people* who make Strategy games.

@joekrauskopf8942

5 жыл бұрын

ensemble studios would like to have a chat with you

@titouancolombe7156

5 жыл бұрын

Them and Creative Assembly are by far the best companies who make strategy games.

@Poffean

5 жыл бұрын

90% of my steam library is paradox games

@KevinMcScrooge

5 жыл бұрын

@@Poffean That's because you spent all your money on Paradox DLCs, which is exactly what I did.

@KjKase

5 жыл бұрын

​@@Poffean ​ @Nope Nope Eh, I own a lot of other games, so I can't say that. But, I do have most Paradox games. I just couldn't bring myself to purchase the DLC for all of them... Too expensive. I have most of the DLC for Stellaris, though. I kinda view their DLC as a subscription, cause it feels that way (at least it did for Stellaris and Europa). You pay for new content every couple months--if it looks good and I'm still playing the game and having fun, I'll buy it. Otherwise, I just pass. The problem is that, then you feel like you're missing something from the game, because the game has been balanced around the new DLC. AoW 3 didn't have tons of DLC and I still play that from time to time and really enjoy myself. While I enjoy new updates like in Stellaris, it just gets pretty expensive after a while at their price point and I end up just not playing anymore if I don't feel it's worth it for the DLC, That being said, I think I've probably spent a couple hundred on Stellaris DLC... Still not sure if it was really worth it, probably won't spend that much in the future if they do the same thing with Planetfall.

Ah yes famous dwarf KGB riot police

@cloroxusthestainlessone4324

3 жыл бұрын

Dwarfs make the best spies, they can fit in small spaces

A combination of the Underminer and a Big Daddy. Truly the greatest leader.

@rocketman2485

5 жыл бұрын

Daddy Underminer pwease burn me with your big long Flammenwerfer

@supernerdbiscuit7489

5 жыл бұрын

Underdaddy

@leadontaste7261

2 жыл бұрын

@@supernerdbiscuit7489 What are you doing, step-underdaddy?

BEHOLD THE UNDERMINER!

@MChief123

5 жыл бұрын

I WAS ALWAYS BENEATH YOU, BUT NOTHING IS BENEATH MEEEEE!

This isn’t Desperate Housewives The Game

@yanislahtal6253

5 жыл бұрын

*Commander Babes

Valefisk after slaughtering a bunch of space animals and innocent civilizations: “Arriverderci.”

@Valefisk

5 жыл бұрын

all i can hear is brad pitt going: kzread.info/dash/bejne/ZpWMq6h_kbq0mrA.html

Imagine being so adept at war-crimes that you instinctively choose the faction best suited to committing them.

@bonogiamboni4830

2 жыл бұрын

Best faction and arguably best secret tech. Psynumbra (torture) and xenoplague (bio warfare) don't mess around either but promethean is just *spicy.*

A bouncer-type big daddy wielding a sword orders his troops to reenact WW1 whilst he slaughters elemental antlions alongside a WH40k dreadnaught And people said Infinity War was an ambitious crossover... bruh

Dark-Blood red color, Mini-gun Mechs, 47 variations of a flame thrower, and basically space nukes/lasers/flamethrowers... Mother Russia would be proud

@someguy1313

4 жыл бұрын

Nah the imperium would be more proud

That final battle was a warcrime faceoff: Napalm vs Bioweapons

I Love that on the DVAR, you can Choose Male and Female gender, and it changes nothing at all on the character model.

Deep down we all know that Valefisk's ethnicity is Warcrimean.

The instant one of your commanders is the underminer you know you have a good game on hand.

If I can't smell the naplam there's not enough fire. Vale, 2019

Just don't tell him that Byzantine Empire in TW: Medieval 2 Crusades campaign have flamethrowers

Imagine you’re the leader of a great stellar civilization, then some cute, 3 foot dwarf dude in underminer cosplay comes up to you. So you ask why he’s here. He stares you directly in the eyes and says “My purpose is to eradicate all live with flame.”

Everyone: Oh no Vale: OOOH YEAH

4:30 well at least he lasted longer than in the movie

Paradox: Why do we have a Dwarf that sets things on fire? Other guy: Valefisk. Paradox: Makes sense to me.

You can't break the Geneva convention if the Star Union that upholds it collapsed.

What would valefisk do without questionable military tactics

@EternalVirgin

3 жыл бұрын

It's not questionable if it gets you the win

This game feels like the definition of "What Geneva Convention"

It isn't a war crime if noone can prove the state you were persecuting ever existed

I can't get enough of this game, most fun I've had gaming in ages. Bonus that the tactical battles have so much depth, constantly learning new tips and tricks. This vid was hilarious, keep em coming!

7:20 FORTIFY FORTIFY FORTIFY

Native Displacement Act= Trail of Tears 2

That Amazon faction is the exact kind of thing I hate in these games. Their units are too weak to properly fight anything, so they just debuff you into the ground. Unfortunately for them, indiscriminate incendiary artillery is VERY effective.

@pweefypweef4089

Жыл бұрын

Yeahhh the fact that Amazon focuses on debuffing makes them versatile with the Xenoplague. The only reason I run Kir'Ko/Xeno is because I love the Zerg from Starcraft and they're the closest playstyle fitting their themes...but now that ive seen Amazon performing better I'm considering switching to Amazon/Xeno and seeing the results.

God, every single name was Slavic, who knew we needed red-russian-napalm-space-dwarfs?!

Killing xenos with fire, a súper military faction, purifying cities with fire THIS IS WARHAMMER 40K

7:32 When you play as Russian Dwarves *Then realize you're fighting Finnish bugs**

So glad you are covering this game! This game is a MASTERPIECE, I have been playing it nonstop since release!!! Having the most fun I've had in any strategy game I've played

Paradox: Greatest Sponsors of Andrew Jackson's Native Policies.

Underminer. I thought it was Zhukov in a mechanized suit

I need more of this I need more Pyromaniac Soviet Dwarves

hell yeah get that coin!!!! i'm so happy you got sponsored. great video, as per

This so feels like Warhammer 40K. I absolutely love this game!

The underminer is allied with stalin, god dammit valefisk. Can we get 1 game where the soviets are not involved. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I have to admit valefisk after many, many hours of watching you there is only one way to describe you and that is If thanos and Stalin had a baby and that baby was born in space marine armor and had heavy flamers for arms Welp that my comment for the day keep up with the great content

Age of WarCrimes: Literal PlanetFall ft. Geneva Top-Priority Manhunt Watchlist: Vale as the Thicc Commie Shorties

Thanks paradox for sponsoring this channel. Amazing and refreshing content as always. Nice video, Thanks buddy, keep it up.

Man i need more videos from you. Keep it up

Amazingly we had basically the same idea!

General Secretary Valefisk, Supreme leader of the Slavic space dwarfs

NPCs when Vale unlocks the flamethrower: (Chuckles) I'm in danger.

Vale committing warcrimes in space? Hell yeah.

This isn't war, this is pest control! You are superior in only one aspect!

Ahem, it's the... *UNDERMINER!*

Please make a series on this please.

"Mr. Blackadder says, when the going gets tough, the tough hide under the table." HUZZAH! A MAN OF CULTURE!

Finally someone gets it. This isn't civ plus Xcom, it's Endless Legend plus Xcom.

LoL the intro alone is worth a like my friend. when i get this (and i AM getting this) im definitely doing an underminer build lmao

More soviet dwarfs please

I love the smell of burning xenos in the morning

Saw the title and i was like scorched earth, oh man this gonna be goooddd

Please show us more of "THE DWARVES OF GREAT PURGE"

11:21 As a Finnish I am mostly impressed by your *Oho* its means like wow. Very proud of you.

I feel like this is the superior Civ experience with a better combat system.

Your D'Var hero there actually reminds me of the Big Daddies from the Bioshock games.

Dude this game is sick can you make this a series? I really want to see more of this and I’m digging the commentary.

7:32 wait, Vale is playing as a Russian dwarf, and he's fighting a bunch of frozen bugs who are throwing Molotoves at his APC.....THEY'RE THE F***ING FINNS!

Our forces are victorious, *comrade valefisk.*

I hate how I got every pop/history meme you said

This reminds me of the spiffing Brit in the fact that your comedy is just like have focused on war crimes and I go into the quotes is because there can't be war crimes there's no war

I like how he panics when he thinks there raising Gabinsk and then proceeds to baptize the city in flame when trying to take it back.

That first sentence summed up the entire game

Your so funny and fun to watch lol

“The Germans are taking kiyev” well, on the scale of aged well

9:50 Oh god, I choked there when you said you had to find good cover followed by running off the highground (which gives aim penalty for anything sooting at you from a lower elevation).

Ok that song at the end goes hard

Ah yes, my favorite unit, Big Daddy Excessive Force Dyslexia Dwarf of the Slavic Nazi Military State. Quality choice Vale, quality choice.

More please!

I can't wait for Vale to play Empire at War and discover TIE Maulers

I am experiencing such a strong deja vu because of this video. I definitely saw it before. deja vu is a strange thing

This gives me weird dark crusade vibes, and i dont know why.

Valefisk:What are those guns? Me:Those are flamethrower minigun arm guns havent you seen them before?

Nobody: Age of Wonders Planetfall: *SLAVIC SPACE DWARVES*

It will be so fun to play this on Xbox

In the fantasy version of planetfall, age of wonders 3. There was a literally scorched earth ability. It was basically a city spell that immediately razed a city if it was captured by the enemy. This can be applied to cities you just captured as well. Running around capturing cities just to bait the AI into burning their own empire down is fun.

You are my favorite KZread and you are really funny

Not exactly what “scorched earth tactics” means, but this is close enough.

Enemy putting everyone to sleep. Malganus is that you? :-)

Scorched earth you say? At first you had my interest but now you have my attention.

you have a good youtuber voice. it's entertaining.

Do more planetfall videos! I bought planetfall after watching this one and I've enjoyed it to no end. I'm not great at strategy games. But I've loved planetfall.

It's like a Alpha Centaury remake, but good unlike Beyond Earth.

@therandomheretek5403

5 жыл бұрын

I didn't find beyond earth bad. It's my favorite Civ game and I still fail to understand the flak it gets.

@l0lLorenzol0l

5 жыл бұрын

@@therandomheretek5403 Compared to Alpha Centauri it's really underwhelming

@therandomheretek5403

5 жыл бұрын

@@l0lLorenzol0l I guess I'll have to check alpha centauri out.

Liked subbed and comment for the algorithm

The dvar and the Amazons are my favourite the dvar because they can say “ a nice route to a settlement you have there it would be a shame if someone put a mountain range there” and the Amazons because they have fucking war penguins

In my mind this is what the squats are doing in another timeline purging filthy xenos :’)

"Getting flashbacks to episode 2" *Fortunate Son intensifies*

3:31 THATS A JET?

12:12 The only good bug is a dead bug- Starship trooper needs to know more guy

Make this a series please

Vale: please unsubscribe Me: no, I don't think I will

this is if command and conquer would have a special child with civilization