While I do not condone cheating or having an affair, it's honestly kinda impressive for the husband to keep TWO relationships going and kept it a secret for SEVENTEEN years from both parties. Nonetheless, what he did was scummy and absolutely trashy, glad to hear everyone hated his guts.

@davidharshman7645

Жыл бұрын

Another impressive sign of them being a-holes is that they make so much more income than normal people that they can financially support two full families...

@Akira625

Жыл бұрын

How long did he really think he could maintain this deception?

@merlinathrawes746

Жыл бұрын

Impressively despicable.

@cas7168

Жыл бұрын

no literally these "second family" stories always baffle me because, like, how do you even manage to do that? even from a time management level it's so wild to me! absolute horrendous behavior aside it's honestly impressive

@destinydreams7689

Жыл бұрын

Also how long was he engaged to the second partner, and how did he keep her interested without going full bigamist? Like, 17 years of a secret that big is impressive to maintain but just, oof. Those poor women and kids.

Another Secret Family: someone like this doesn't have stress or anxiety in the way rSlash is describing. Lying to people and being a bad person is their baseline. There is no emotional turmoil.

@plovergrrl

Жыл бұрын

Exactly! I'm glad someone said this. This happened to a friend and the dude felt no remorse except for how it negatively affected him. He wasn't bothered by the lying.

@codyjohnson6427

Жыл бұрын

That's insane that he could live a lie for that long

@kranberry3318

Жыл бұрын

It’s like the guy that stole from the food bank. His wife showed him that needy people were being told there was no fresh produce left because he took it all and they would go hungry because of his heinous actions and he was just… indifferent. These a-holes just don’t care. They don’t see what they’re doing as wrong, so they don’t stress about it.

@fanfictiondreamer7836

Жыл бұрын

They must get a thrill out of it

Last story: Thank you Dabney for also covering wholesome stories as a re-freshener from lying/backstabbing/cheating spouses, super toxic families, crazy Karens and narcissistic and/or abusive business owners/managers/supervisors/bosses!

@Ahrpigi

Жыл бұрын

I think one day a week dedicated to wholesome, feel good stories would be really good for his mental health - and ours!

@chrstfer2452

Жыл бұрын

​@@Ahrpigii would love that, personally. I need more tearjerking positivity in my life, reminders the world isnt all bad.

@BenoitRAG3

Жыл бұрын

​@@chrstfer2452it's hard to find positive vibes that often. World sucks

@mrlugh

Жыл бұрын

I like all of Dabney's videos, but I gave this one a thumbs up because of the positive story at the end.

@ACowardlyCheese

Жыл бұрын

He could call it r/efresher (That's a good joke, laugh)

Story 1: "We spent Christmas together!" YES, YES, YES! Don't get mad, GET EVEN! The best revenge is a life well lived indeed and making sure that the kids at least get to meet on good terms is an excellent start to that. Even if they don't get along at first, if they can form some kind of mutual relationship, it's still worth it. The husband royally screwed himself over her. He had a good thing going, but blew it because he just HAD to post it all over the internet. At the very least, he should've done a better job hiding it. I don't blame the kids if they completely cut contact. This is just a messed up situation he created for them, no matter how much you try to sugarcoat it. Story 2: Good God! Why can't these guys just stay in ONE committed relationship? I feel bad for Cherry for finding out she's just "the mistress" in the situation. That shows how little Jonas actually thinks of her-he was already married and played the "I don't believe in marriage card" to hide the fact. Guys like him make me sick! Story 3: Nice to finish things on a happy ending and not one of those "entitled brat" stories~

Final story: I've heard this one before but it still makes me smile, I also remember there were plenty of heartwarming comments as well explaining this. There are some schools who try and teach their students how to behave politely when out and about, it seems silly but it's a win-win, it teaches life skills that are often brushed over because "common sense", and the students usually get a fun day out as long as they learn how to treat people with respect and kindness. There were stories from other commentors about seeing other schools doing this as well, taking the class to restaurants and bowling alleys and such.

First Story: Wow, 17 straight years this man somehow hid this second family from OP. I get how OP feels but she shouldn’t pretend that what he is doing isn’t happening and OP should leave this man and take the kids with her. I’m glad that OP started the process of divorce from this pathetic man. So he not only hurt OP, he hurt the other woman too with his cheating, he deserve all of this. Lmao this man has the nerve to cry and plead when HE was the one who was cheating for 17 years. I’m glad OP and the other family don’t hold any resentment towards each other, especially OP and the ex fiancée. I hope they both have a great life Second Story: I understand OP's initial reaction towards Cherry, especially after she waited 3 months after finding out to tell OP. That being said, Jonas (like the first story) is a scumbag who I question how he manage to hide a 6 year relationship. Lmao, some people really suggested OP stays with a man who was cheating on her for 6 years straight? Hilarious. Third Story: Why can’t the campers at my job be like these 110 kids 😭. These kids' parents raised them all right. I’m so glad the last story was a wholesome one with a happy ending

@abi_cat28

Жыл бұрын

Right! I wouldn't trust someone after a stunt like that. If you can lie for 17 years about that, what else are you lying about?

@arnoldfossman1701

Жыл бұрын

@@abi_cat28 I say that OP drops him, preferably on his head.

@nicholassanabria6493

Жыл бұрын

Agreed honestly 17 years is a long time to hide other things

@chronobretz9511

Жыл бұрын

Cheating is an instant out always

@xKCAZxLEADER

Жыл бұрын

@@nicholassanabria6493like that is straight up baffling to me. He hid a second family for almost 2 decades

I love when cheated on people come together in solidarity. OP gained a ehole second family, with a lovely sister in arms and several sweet children. The fiancé gained a powerful comrade as well, and three kids who can be great supports and role models for hers. Meanwhile the cheater lost both. Sucks to suck!

@blackroberts6290

Жыл бұрын

hunted both rabbits, ended up with none.

RSlash, Albuquerque is a city in New Mexico, not Canada. The province you're probably thinking of is Alberta. OP even said 'across the country' with no mention of foreign branches

@shycosmicgirl

Жыл бұрын

I had to double take when he said that

@SlipShodBob

Жыл бұрын

Glad I wasn't going crazy when I thought he said that

@jjkj17

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, same here!

@DozIT

4 ай бұрын

Gave me a good laugh lol

@OliviaConroy

4 ай бұрын

THANK YOU!! Came to the comments looking for this and was like “is NO ONE gonna mention that he just said Albuquerque is in Canada???” 😂😂😂

Story 2: This feels a bit like the inverse of the first story. This time, the second wife learns the truth and is devastated. Honestly, I don't believe having two families is all that of a good idea, I'd be ashamed! I guess the reason why both cheating husbands got to this point is because they feel no shame or guilt for it, they just want to screw multiple women without consequence

@insu_na

Жыл бұрын

I disagree about the last part. It's absolutely sick that he does that, but I don't think he just does it to sleep around. You "can" cheat on your spouse easily without having to build an entire second, pretend-monogamous life. Tinder and stuff exists, so I'm highly doubtful it was just about sex. Maybe it's some kind of fetish or whatever, thrill-seeking or something, I dunno. It's disgusting behaviour, but again I'm pretty sure it's not about sleeping around

The last story just restored a bit of my faith in humanity. May those kids grow up just as kind and understanding.

A movie plot happened to my family recently too. My mom found out she has a brother she never knew about. Apparently, her dad had a one night stand right before he met and started dating her mom. Mom's brother was adopted at a week old because the biological mom was in collage and wouldn't be able to properly provide for him.

Story 3: when people say "Unite the families" in these situations typically what they mean is that both spouses that were cheated on platonically coming together to raise the kids under one roof for a period and unite against the creep that screwed them over as a team effort. Not polyamory in my experience.

@llamaniaman4002

Жыл бұрын

Based on the way OP reacted, people likely straight up TOLD her to consider polyamory. She wouldn't outright mention it otherwise.

@autisticnation7140

Жыл бұрын

@@llamaniaman4002 Agreed. But most stories like this I've seen unite the families is more along the lines of "Become a lesbian couple" than "It's okay he cheated*

Story 1: Cheating with a mistress is already bad enough, but starting a whole second family and hiding it? That is just next level bad, and it really hurts. If there is any silver lining, the husband was at least not abusing anyone outright (besides the fact he basically ran off right after OP gave birth), and the two families seem to be friendly with each other, albeit with some awkwardness.

@CatCheshire

Жыл бұрын

Well... At least he has good taste in women - they both chose family over anything else XD

@sailorathena17

Жыл бұрын

If I were the kids of Op I’d ignore the other children and tell them “We’re not family”

@velvetdarksoul8741

Жыл бұрын

​@sailorathena17 why? It's not their fault

@akl2k7

Жыл бұрын

Of course, cheating is a form of emotional abuse.

@mariakhan7986

Жыл бұрын

@@sailorathena17 that's so immature, it is NOT the kids fault, why should they be cut off?

Story 1: I can't stand people like this guy, they do something terrible that get caught they start crying, talking about how they didn't mean to hurt you. But never care enough about you to stop or not do it at all.

@Gotabonetopick

Жыл бұрын

Cheaters are inherently selfish people that don't care about their partners. They only care when they get caught.

We found out a few years ago that my dad had a second family in, I think, the 70s. His wife at the time actually made friends with the other woman and they stayed friends lowkey for the rest of their lives, never told my dad or their kids, and both divorced my dad for other reasons. I have no idea how that worked or why they were so chill about it, but good for them I guess? My mom was wife number four and they met several years after the other two relationships ended.

@zanyraccoon6361

Жыл бұрын

Good to know some women actually handle the situation with maturity.

The craziest part for me is that the fiancé in the Albuquerque family has been most likely dropping hints to the husband saying when shall we get married? Shall we set a date, look at venues etc, all normal things an engaged couple would be doing and he’s probably been brushing it off and saying “not yet” or something as he knows he’s already married. Also how he has managed to keep track of TWO families without slipping up with names or anything is mind blowing to me 🤯

Gotta wonder what all the people with second families did during covid. Which family do you quarantine with and how do you explain it to the other. I wonder how many second families got discovered because of the pandemic.

First story: I like to imagine the two families having their Christmas together, happy and warm inside, while the idiot dad stands outside watching, alone. I know that most likely didn't even come close to happening, but the mental image of it warms my heart.

First story: I was hoping, for OP's sake, that it was gonna be one of those stories where the stars have aligned and her husband had a doppleganger and everything just happened to line up perfectly. Stranger and more improbable things have happened...

Story 1: I was so hoping for a nice plot twist, like that the husband has a long lost twin who he learned off recently and has been getting to know and to prove it, the other family comes to visit. This is R Slash, so i shouldn't have had that much hope

Last story reminds me of the time when I was a barista/front of house and the little cafe I worked at. We had about 300 international students, as well as the usual workers in the council offices (where the cafe was located in) one day and like OP in the last story was dreading it. These students instead was an absolute delight! They were polite, respectful, asked where they could put their used cutlery/plates/mugs and got rid of any rubbish and thanked us for our hard work. We were super touched and it made our day, despite being short-staffed and our manager did make sure to send on the appreciation we felt to them and the persons who was responsible for the students.

Loves the wholesome story twist at the end. I totally thought it would end with the kid’s mom storming there the next day demanding the tip money back.

My family went through something similar to the first story. My mom divorced my dad when she learned that not only did he sleep with another woman but also had a son with her. No one told me why my parents divorced cause I was only 8 but 2 years later when my Dad had me for a birthday party with his side of the family he had me play with this younger kid that I'd never met before. We were at Chuck E Cheese and we quickly ran out of quarters so we ran back to my dad to ask him for more money. When the boy ran up to my dad he said " dad dad can we have more quarters?". I was confused at why he would call my Dad his dad but my dad saw the confusion on my face and told me " son this is your younger half brother". A normal person would have been shocked or surprised by learning that had another sibling but my dumbass was like ALRIGHT I HAVE A NEW BROTHER!!!

@velvetdarksoul8741

Жыл бұрын

That's the bets reaction honestly 😆

@KV_zombie

Жыл бұрын

​@velvetdarksoul8741 honestly looking back I should had been more surprised by this news but at the time all I could think was that I wasn't the youngest sibling anymore and that now I had my first brother. Me and him grew up as close as siblings could be to the point where I don't call him my half brother, he's always gonna be my brother.

@mariakhan7986

Жыл бұрын

So many words just to say you condone your father's actions. Even at that age, I'd know when an adult fucked up.

@Starfloofle

Жыл бұрын

@@mariakhan7986 Oh come on, he was only 10 at that age, and it sounds like he was a kid without a lot of playmates his age, of course a kid is gonna see the bright side first.

@mariakhan7986

Жыл бұрын

@@Starfloofle nope, kids who love their parents don't condone cheating spouses.

Last story: like everyone else stated thanks for the last story. A good and wholesome story should always be last because it shows us that not every thing or every person is awful. Goodness does exist it’s just not in ample quantities of which we had grown accustomed to.

Man, that story really reminded me of this one dude during WW2 who had so many secret personalities that he ended up getting awards from both the Allies and Axis for his service. He wasn't a double agent, he was like, an Nth-level agent. He ended up a total legend in the spy scene once it all came to light. Not even sure on whose side he actually was.

First story, as the guy was taken to court his job would have definitely taken notice, not only did he lose two families, but he may have been fired too

Good morning rslash and good morning everyone reading this❤❤❤

@scratchysponge1140

Жыл бұрын

Good afternoon from me

@WinterBoots15

Жыл бұрын

Good morning

@hannahfanning9585

Жыл бұрын

Good morning!

@ijnyamato1109

Жыл бұрын

Good morning

@samairagoel

Жыл бұрын

Good evening for me

Rslash, you may never see this, but I’ve been watching your videos everyday since my 8th grade year in middle school, I’m going into my sophomore year of college, thank you for always being consistent, I love your channel! Have a great day if you see this 🫶🏻

2 wives, 2 lives, 2 families... damn dude leave some for the rest of us 😅

My dad's grandfather was Belgian. He was married and had a child. During WWI, he deserted, fled to Paris, met a woman, and married her. Eventually, his first wife found him! A trial happened, in France. His second wife won, because she had 2/3 children, and needed the financial support of a husband more, according to the court. My grandmother was one of these kids! (And he slapped her and her sisters regularly, so, wasn't much of a win). Obviously given the time period her wife couldn't really divorce him, so they stayed together! It feels crazy to me that this shit still happens nowadays when the internet exists

I just have to say rSlash I have been listening to your content for a very long time I tend to listen to it not just here but on spotify with my 14 year old special needs kid. So thank you for making your content.

Third story: Nice kids. With the update: The principal should be proud of how well their school educated those kids.

@gabrielledormuth4634

Жыл бұрын

If the kids are that nice, I would give a lot of thanks to the parents as well

@franciscojaviermendezrinco1902

Жыл бұрын

@@gabrielledormuth4634 sure. Just that the parents aren't mention in the story.

The fact that there are 2 stories about secret families in one video is fucken nuts!! Agreed about the whole energy thing. I’m strictly monogamous and in the past I struggled balancing a romantic relationship, friends, work, school and family and I’ve talked to polyamorous people who’ve told me that balancing multiple partners can get hectic and stressful from time to time so to have 2 different lives with 2 families and I assume 2 sets of friends just sounds insane. The fact that some people have the mental capacity for that is wild

When I turned 19 my sperm donor (bio dad, he doesn't deserve the name dad) contacted me after not seeing me since I was two weeks old and randomly spouted out that I have seven siblings I've never met. I jumped from having two siblings to 9 in what seems like one day.

When my friends dad died, they already knew about wife, ex wife and one girlfriend so friend knew there was half-siblings. But during the estate inventory there appeared three extra half-siblings too, from two different girlfriends. The dad had a traveling job and likely had a woman in every city. My friend said it was sad and absurd at the same time.

"Don't just have a second family, have a third family with an alternative lifestyle"

@magicfish8213

Жыл бұрын

Not only is that more cheating, that would mean the husband kills all the families. Then we would never get to hear the story

I have a relative who was in two long term relationships at the same time. I met both of the women's families and everything. Both women knew of each other but couldn't prove what he was doing. He ended up breaking up with both of them for various reasons including the amount of stress it put on him to live a double life. One girl was a party animal that he had fun with and the other was a homebody that he wanted for the stability. He regrets that time in his life because of the bad decisions he made including not committing to the homebody. As well as losing his hair like Homer Simpson in the process.

1st story: good on O.P. and the ex-fiance for realizing who the bad guy was, and also it is wonderful that they are trying to merge the family together too. All in all it was a happy ending. 🤙

The reality is that since the kids are 18, she's not going to get child support, and he's the breadwinner. So if they live in a state with no alimony, she's walking away with nothing. I can't imagine that a dude with 2 families has much in savings either.

Op, call every divorce lawyer in your city and Albuquerque so he has to travel/pay extra. Hire a PI to get even more evidence, screenshot the posts on facebook.. maybe have him get served at his "fiancées'" house 😂

Last story: that’s definitely how my friends and I were in middle/high school, so cute hahaha

The first story, not as uncommon as you would think. My Great Aunt who's husband was in textiles, was married to him for 30+ years. She found out about his 2nd family at his funeral. 2nd family's wife was married for 18 years. Apparently my aunt was told that hubby went to the casino every weekend, where wife 2 hubby went to take care of the family business. I'm more shocked that bigamist wife never wanted to move closer to the family business so she could be with him more. Apparently this was the 80s and it made national papers.

When I was in Middle School I went to a math competition and all of the kids went to this little local diner. I remember the waitress was obviously irritated by a bunch of kids piling in. My mom had been server and she always really beat tipping and pre-bussing into our heads. I think my meal was like $3 and I tipped her a $5. 😂 But I was so young I didn't really realize exactly how tipping worked and I didn't realize how big of a tip that was compared to my meal. I've never seen somebody's attitude change so quickly. She went from clearly pissed off too so thankful. And I was honestly so confused. It wasn't until I was much older that I fully understood the situation and it still makes me giggle. She probably thought, great a bunch of kids who will make a giant mess and won't tip. And then I pre bussed the table tipped her 200% 🙃 (And no... we did not win the math competition if that isn't obvious)

The secret family story; OH BOY. I actually did experience this. Just a few years ago me & my 2 sisters found out we have a half sister. But my dad, mom, AND grama didn't know she even existed. Her daughter found us on Facebook, & apparently her grandmother told her about my dad. I don't understand all of it, but the Springer Style twist is that she is actually the same age as our mom. My mom & dad have a 20 year age difference, & my dad had our half sister when he was about 18. Sooooooooo that's it. My older half sister & my mom are the same age.

Story 2: okay I'm stuck on how people subjected OP just let the six years of cheating slide and be a polyamorous couple. Just let go of all the lying, cheating, and overwhelming betrayal and let the man that screw two women over have his cake and eat it too. I'm going to assume that these family members from this douchebag side, because I just don't want to believe strangers can hear this story and suggest giving this guy what he wants.

@animeotaku307

Жыл бұрын

As OP pointed out, polyamory requires honesty. You come up front with “I want to date multiple people” when you’re going to be serious with someone, not when you get caught with someone else.

@RiveroftheWither

Жыл бұрын

​@@animeotaku307Polyamory is also not one sided, everyone is supposed to be free to have other partners provide it's within agreed limits discussed in the relationship. If I had to hazard a guess I would assume all those "be poly!" people are themselves serial cheaters or guys that fantasize about having a one sided open relationship.

Second to last story. My mom never had a husband that lead a double life but she definitely chose financial stability over happiness. Needless to say she's constantly talking about wishing she hit the lottery and she'd leave him. It's such a sad situation 😞

When I was in graduate school, I drove motor coach to pay rent. I took a lot of 8th graders to D.C. my best tip ever, was the kids on one of my trips passed a gallon size bag around the bus (there were 55 students), and presented me with a literal bag full of random change. BEST TIP EVER!

Two stories that are essentially the same, the only real difference is the time involved and how the OP's found out. I've been in the Navy and had multiple deployments. I was also a long-haul truck driver and spent way too much time away from home. Never once did I ever consider cheating on my wife. I made a promise to her and kept it. I don't understand these people who don't. BTW, we've been married over 48 years and have 4 adult children. Restaurant story: Sounds like an incredibly good bunch of kids. Some parents raise their kids to have good manners and the school CAN keep it going. Fantastic job, not just to OP and her coworkers, but the kids, parents and school as well!

Love this subreddit; One of my favorites along with malicious compliance, petty/pro revenge.

A friend(f40) told me that she just found out she has half siblings from her mom's cheating. Imagine finding out at forty? Pretty wild

@Absolute_Silly_Willy

Жыл бұрын

How did she not know if she wasent pregnant

@j-zk6tf

Жыл бұрын

@@Absolute_Silly_Willy don't really know the particulars. She wasn't living with her and the siblings are like half her age

I’ve shared this before but I’ll share it again. Some years back I read an article that a woman wrote about how she discovered her common law husband had a second family after she accidentally discovered a handmade Father’s Day card featuring a little boy and a woman who had different colored hair than her; they had twin girls. After he came back from his x weeks on she confronted him about the card he admitted to cheating - with her. He had a wife and son. She broke up with him and the wife divorced him.

Thanks for ending on a high note. We all needed that after the first few stories.

We need more wholesome stories at the end of each video, rSlash. ❤

Secret Family OP: The only way to wrap this up in a satisfying way is for OP and the Fiancé, after ditching the cheater, to fall in love with each other, get married, and live happily ever after.

About the 3rd story: I am mostly interested in WHAT KIND OF JOB DOES HE HAVE TO KEEP 2 SAHW WITH SO MANY KIDS

Whats funny about this is that last year, I learned I have a half sister living in Canada. I guess back in the early 70s, during the draft, my dad took off to canada, met up with a gal and while he knew she was pregnant when he left, he was also a dumb 19 year old draft dodger, so I can't really blame him, her mom told her nothing of who her dad was and she had no knowledge of him whatsoever until after her mom passed, then she went through all of her moms "crazy journals" found out who her possible dads were (either my dad or my Uncle as her mom was with them both) and through a ancestory check, she was able to track dad down, they spoke for a few months online, then she came down to see him and meet for the first time. Im glad she came into his life because it has made a world of difference on his mental health. Her and I talk regularly.

My thoughts on your question there, it's the thrill. Knowing you could get caught, but being able to keep up the lie for long enough gives excitement. It's like knowing you're getting away with something you shouldn't. That's what a lot of people do with the cheating, but with the two marriages it gets extreme levels. Basically they want to have the thrill of something like gambling but with their own lives that Jeopardy in a way. And then once the sensation of having The thrill is all done, then it just kind of goes into routine since you thought you got away with it.

First story... Since this is Best-Of, I expected a bigger twist. Honestly, there's no twist? It's just... One dude being unfaithful, and somehow being able to hide it for 17 years. I was 100% prepared for it to come out, that OP just had an identical twin, and OP was too angry and rash to listen to her husband trying to explain this.

I’m with you rSlash. I couldn’t handle the work of having two families. It would tear me apart. But, for someone that would do this, they don’t think of the other people involved. They think of themselves. That said, I am a problem solver and I mentally tried to figure out how someone would logistically do this type of thing. If you’re constantly flying for work, you end up joining the admiral’s club or whatever the VIP lounge stuff is for your preferred airline. You keep one persona in the locker you have there at all times. Or you simply space a day between departure and arrival if your club doesn’t offer storage. And instead you get a gym membership that allows you store items in a personal locker. One way or another, you need a buffer zone that only you have access to. Then when you arrive at your locker, you switch from one persona to the other. Get two of everything you like to use and simply color code them. Black leather for one family, brown leather for the other. Or gold details for one and silver for the other. I mean, even the scents you use. Make sure you have a separate cologne for each persona because sense memory of scent helps put you in the right mindset. You could even have different flavors of gum/tic tac you use in each persona. The wallet is key. By having a seat of credit cards, etc for one location and a set for the other, you can set billing to each household and then there aren’t any strange charges you have to explain away. You have the wife set up the family Netflix and other streaming stuff as “you’ll just screw it up,” or “with as much as they’ve got me running around, I’d feel better if you were the point of contact on that if there’s any issues,” so you don’t end up with problems with Netflix or Disney plus ratting you out to the other family. No phone notifications turned on, so no “out of persona” popups happen. Email is an easy fix, each email is different and you have a work email, obviously, but you route each email through a GMail account with the family specific emails getting auto routed to a folder, so the only email notifications that show up in the inbox are work related. Social media was covered pretty easily, but you could completely shut down having social media as security concerns considering the sheer amount of information they all collect, but you can “have a profile for her,” so she can tag you in posts and whatnot. This way there’s no expectation of you going out of your way to post. Considering the costs of everything these days, you have to make sure that you emphasize that you’re working so hard to get promoted so then “all our money problems will be over.” While you can also set up your direct deposit at work to do a split between household accounts. 10% off the top to your private fund, with the rest getting split, not 50/50, but based on the number of people you’re supporting and cost of living in the area. You use the same pet names for everyone. Wife is “baby,” oldest kid is “Kiddo,” youngest kid is “squirt,” middle is sport or princess depending on gender or whatever. Unless you’re simply amazing with names, I’d recommend this otherwise, you’re likely to call someone by the wrong name eventually and then have to come up with a reason that name was in your head. I’m realizing that there’s a lot of set up required to get this going, but most of it could actually be done during the courtship phase of your second marriage. With everything else being done to obfuscate any cheating. Like your married and single personas. And before people start assuming that I have multiple families or am a serial cheater, I’m an author. 😂 This is what I write on a normal basis. I write cozy mysteries where something like this has happened and the main character has to figure out who killed the cheating husband and if it was one or both of the wives that found out, etc. I love my wife and daughter and like I said in the beginning, couldn’t imagine doing something like this myself. I could write it, but that’s about it

Imagine if the first story ended with: turns out my husband was a twin, but his parents gave up his bro at birth. The Facebook posts are of his twin! Because weird stories like that are possible and happen 😂

The second 'secret family' story: WHAT WAS WITH THE PEOPLE IN THE ORIGINAL POST COMMENTS SUGGESTING A POLY RELATIONSHIP? Like, the guy lied about a second family to each of his spouses for years, made up about "not believing in marriage" to Cherry to avoid being found (or worst, charged with polygamy) and the response of some redditors is "Oh you can all be a big family together"? These people lack any grip on reality, and probably are as bad if not worst than the husband on the story.

I will never understand how people can sleep at night knowing they're cheating on their spouse.

She should’ve waited for her husband to marry that fiancée, then turn him in for bigamy. He’d go to prison for it, and would forever have a record

2nd story: OP shouldnt tell Jonas she knows, just she wants a divorce. Cherry shouldnt tell she knows....just to see what happens. Jonas: Guess what Cherry, I changed my mind about the idea about marriage! Then when he least suspects it...hit him with the TRUTH!

Love the last story. Those kids are going to become great adults (if high school doesn't change them).

For 17 years straight that man deceived both of his wives, I don’t know how he pulled this off for this long without giving off any signs.

Imagine being the children from the second family: if your dad were a decent human being, you would not exist. That would be such a surreal realisation for me.

On the first story, I'm sure it started off small, to him. He was just hooking up with a girl he met, out going on a date while he "had no one". Surprise, surprise, she and her have shared interests, because they obviously chatted. From there it was the dopamine high of getting away with something. By the time that wore off, he had feelings and possibly an ongoing commitment just starting. So he goes into damage management, since paying for the second chick is less than half his salary, he takes that as the logical option. If he keeps the second woman happy, she won't raise a fuss that will get back to the wife. So he fabricates, lies stack up, and evidence has to be made up to support the story, while that leaves more evidence. After a point he said worrying and thinks he's gotten away with it, but he's literally playing a game of chance each time he goes to the other. Even if you stack the deck, one in a million will happen if you take enough chances.

First story: the PERFECT final ending to this would for the ex-wives to end up together.

First story‘ imagine how fun it would’ve been if both women had gotten together and planned to mess with the husband. They could’ve changed out photos on the walls and everything, and when the husband came home, the woman who lived there would hide, and the other woman would welcome a man and me like oh honey, how are you? How was your trip and act like she’s lived there for years. Can you imagine he might not even notice right away? Lol!

As someone born in New Mexico, hearing Dabney say that Albuquerque is in Canada is kinda triggering tbh.

Off topic: but I love hearing R/Slash talking abt his love 4 his wife and daughter😭😭 “ugh having 1 wife is hard imagine having 2 no I love my wife”

In regards to 6:00- I was 17 when I found out me and my 4 siblings have an unofficial half-brother! My dad had an incredibly brief affair with another woman before I was born, while he was still married to my mom, but neither he nor the other woman claim himself as the dad (the other woman is well-off enough to support herself and my half-brother; idk if she's married). My mom genuinely doesn't care, and she says that based on the timeline, even if she knew at the time that it happened, she still wouldn't have cared because they were going through a rough patch and she was just tired all the time. When she found out though she thought it was hilarious because he looks *exactly* like one of my brothers, and she always thought my brother got his looks from her

Definitely needed that wholesome story at the end after the first two and those horrible husbands. Good choice Rslash.

Last story, I kept waiting for something bad to be mentioned. Talk about ending on a good note with a reminder that there are also positive stories on Reddit.

My friend's Mom was married to a Bigamist. She had no clue. She married him and had 2 kids with him. Idk how she found out but apparently he fled the country to go be with his other family in Yeman. I have no idea if she tried to contact the other women. I was only in 5th grade when I was told by my friend about her Dad. Her Mom was amazing though. She worked really hard and somehow still found time to volunteer at the school. She would do random volunteer at school and also was one of tbe aldults involved in the Girl Scouts. I think that she was a leader but Im not 100% on that but she was always there. She seemed to be around more than my mom. She had a good job that was flexible in her hours. Even the birthday parties she through were awesome. She always had great food that any kid would love. I'd end up bigging out trying everything. She always had a lot extra and she would have the parties at different places each year. She was an amazing woman. Idk how she handled it. I just know she worked hard and was always focused on her daughters. I never even seen her upset. She was one of those people who always seemed happy. I think she didn't want her daughters to see her down because her husband that she loved was a creep. I haven't talked to that friend in a long time. We lost touch but I think I will after hearing this. I also want to see how her Mom is doing. She was always so kind to me.

1st Story: Glad they both kicked him to the curb And that at least OP's kids are already adults and don't have to witness the divorce in the most important stages of their development The ex wives connecting and bringing the kids together is a really bittersweet ending

Shouldn't both of these husbands be in PRISON?

It’s honestly impressive how the husband managed to have and take care of _two_ whole families. Just imagine the amount of time, money, energy, etc. he had to keep this up for two decades, it’s staggering to think about. I have no idea where he gets his resilience from, good on him I guess

@alexisgrunden1556

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High-functioning sociopathy, and excellent organizational skills and memory. It's the only way the psychological logistics work at all.

@shaereub4450

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The second wife DID said she was finally independent apart from him, so...

Now you have me looking at my husband funny 🤨 even though he’s home 24/7

bruh i found out at 21 that i had a half sister who had an entire ass family and that my dad had an affair at the beginning of my parents relationship. we tried to get to know each other but we have nothing in common aside from our looks. i get along with her son alright enough though. he really reminds me of dad and myself with our interests but his passion...he really did take after dad.

The first story, Albuquerque is in New Mexico United States not in Canada. I laughed when Daphne said in Canada.

Secret family 1: I really want op and the ex fiancee to fall in love with each other and blend their families. Then their ex shows up thinking he gets to be 'big man' to two women, and instead gets rejected viciously by both of them. 😈

first story: well i don't think he didn't like his first family. i guess he was a bit lonely when he wasn't with his family so he started a second family in this second home and did love both of them. doesn't change the fact that he cheated and deserves to be divorced.

How the hell do people have the energy to maintain ONE family, let alone two???

_Seventeen years_ I-!? I can barely keep track of my own single-ass life never mind being able to have a _second_ life for that long??? OP shouldn’t feel like this is her fault, this is entirely on that bastard not keeping it in his pants.

1st story: manipulators seem to get away with a lot of relationships when their significant others are too weak to do anything with the "he/she hurt me but is so kind to me" excuse

That first story was literally just that Family Guy Nike commercial gag.

I just check my Rslash Favs playlist and yeah, a majority of them are the Best of Updates videos. This one is getting added.

13:35 this story made me so happy I got chills I LOVE IT WHEN PPL ARE NICE 😭😭

A narcissist and/or sociopath wouldn’t have the self reflection to have anxiety or any emotional turmoil.

It was incredibly mature of the OP in the first story to not hold any sort of grudge against the woman her husband was having an affair with and also accepting her into her family.

If these stories are true... imagine all the lies and coverups these Husbands go through to hide their other lives... but when it came to social media, they said, "Nahhhh, I'm sure it'll be fine to post evidence of what I'm doing on platforms my wives use, what could go wrong?"

My good friend has a very complicated and almost irl soap opera life. I won't get into his mom's half because it's already complicated as it. His dad was much older when he was born and he lived pretty neglected. His dad was a very successful pilot and travel the world and when he died, my friends much older half siblings came knocking on their door. Neither he nor his mom ever knew of them but the adult babies came crawling for an inheritance that didn't exist and harassed them for months. Luckily my friend got his dad's ashes even though they didn't have a good relationship. They hung in our living room though the time we were roomates

I found out at 31 that my father had been cheating on my mom for at least 24 years. Which means he started before one of my siblings was even born 🙃 I'm worried if I try one of those DNA things that I'll find out I have half siblings somewhere. I can't decide if finding out well into adulthood is better or worse than finding out at 18 like in story 1.

When I was 18, my Dad i troduced me to his secret family and my 16 year old half-sister. He thought I would play along wih his lies. He suddenly died a year later and the fight over his body at the hospital was ridiculous. Dad was a narcissist and a master manipulator so I'm sure there were other women too but never found out. ETA: this was in the 70s and 80s, Dad died in 85.

First story: I shock that the other women didn't know to cause 9/10 when a dude/girl got another family they know about the other family and choose to be quiet but the other women was shock and one thing I love about this story that OP and the other women decide to hang out cause they want their kids to know they got sibling bring all the kids together and that what really important that the kids lost their dad but they gained new sibling

If I had a nickel every time I heard a story where a man who works in insurance had a second family. I would have 3 nickels which is not a lot, but weird that it happened 3 times. (2 of those stories came from family...)

I'm just saying, OP in the first story could close the loop and just marry Backup Mom. Bam, now all five kids have two loving mothers and one "shared sperm donor". It's a win win!

I have a feeling O.P and Cherry are going to be best friends after story 2!