I was taught, from earliest memories, 'what you like least in others, you like least in yourself.' My dad said it to me almost daily... I was upset often... and it was always true for me. It was a long time before I recognized what I LIKED about others was in me as well. Great talk.

@MadameWesker

2 жыл бұрын

Wish somebody would've told me that growing up.

@high_tash709

Жыл бұрын

This is something I've found out myself in my late 20s, would of been useful if I knew it before. But better ever then never :)

@lyfisgud6984

Жыл бұрын

Wow! I just realised ds a year ago in my early 30s... Nd it has changed d way I used to look at pple

@theonewhosthere

Жыл бұрын

We are all connected and often when we look at others it’s like looking into a reflection

@sayusayme7729

Жыл бұрын

Nice 🌬

“Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

So I need to look at my fear of not being the the good guy by being helpful and not being kind to myself and respecting myself,my desires,and my needs by setting boundaries and giving my self the right to say no. Also to admit that I alllow myself to be with people who hate me and want to hurt me by being polite. By acting passively and wanting to respect others over myself I am self-harming-sabotaging my joy.

@iamchannelll

10 ай бұрын

your not alone bro i have similar issues

I realized after my entanglement with the narcissistic bf that where I complained at him about his irresponsibility, selfish, apathetic, spontaneous too often, just didn't care, I was the extreme on the other side. Unconditional positive regard for others, give give give, super responsible, share share share, communication...he was the sucker punch that made me reflect that I needed to balance these extreme areas.

@xxxPLoads

24 күн бұрын

Isn't it a wonderful thing when we can be grateful for what for a time seemed purely harmful and a curse. 🤕 and we can be truly grateful that even the blows that seemed to knock out and threatened to overwhelm us were in fact OK and we not only survived the worst, we somehow by divine grace found fresh meaning, could share our harrowing horror as a story of hope and authentic insight and love, forgive and be forgiven for not seeing the darkness. The light is so bright and of course it is drawn to shine into the darkest and wildest of places whilst we finally come to see truly into the darkest places we perceive how there is nothing more than love to be seen. He showed you what a divine gift you had on your side in being kind and what a kindness you are to everyone for learning to love and take responsibility for yourself for the world with such transcendent kindness U shine fresh hope and insight and grace. Wishing u love, joy and peace on your way, godspeed and kind regards. 😌🙏🏼

“The shadow is a defense for children.. it’s a place to put things we pretend are not there.” translation: peek-a-boo

@MidnightCrow928

3 жыл бұрын

Mind. Blown.

That's the best description of shadow work and projection I've come across online. I really appreciate this talk.

When he said learn to break a few rules I laughed but I get what he means. Touched my heart.

Honestly I need more content like this, I am a child who suffered from mental abuse from my father, and his type a Personailty. I project so much of his negative energy but it makes me too cry like it is so unintentional. But hearing this is going to be part of my journey to help break the mental block. I want to destroy it. More why don’t I learn how to relax and be less type a and more of the person and, understand it’s fear.

We learn from everyone we cross paths with. Be open minded to everyone because you might miss a wonderful lesson.

@xxxPLoads

24 күн бұрын

For your life is your own, each life is a vessel. We each have a purpose to share that is special.

I love this it makes me feel better about feeling judged by others, people often say to just not take it personally but it’s far easier to not take it personally when you understand why

@PersephoneRising333

Жыл бұрын

I highly recommend “The Four Agreements” for additional guidance on that aspect (and more) 💕🕊

Thank you for this, I've had trouble understanding the shadow and this was the most helpful video I've seen on this topic.

@boxeriain

3 жыл бұрын

No problem, Max 😜

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Kale please check out Manly P Hall on the personality and Dr Gabor Mate

I’ve seen several videos on shadow work as of late and this with the exception of 1 other video has been the best explanation of this very important process. I swear I avoided doing this for years because of the videos I would watch and they were incredibly confusing and did not recognize it’s importance. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU 🙏🏽 it feels like I found a pot of gold and can now truly obtain the life, spirit, and energy I’ve always wanted.

@gaurav3290

Жыл бұрын

Read Debbie Ford's books for shadow work. Her books have practical steps.

@YogaPinay

Жыл бұрын

What is the "1 other video"? Could be of help to many. Thanks in advance.

@phoebusapollo4865

Жыл бұрын

Are you a goddess? If so who?

@jeraldbaxter3532

Жыл бұрын

Like you, I watch a fair number of videos about psychology \ philosophy \ self - help (and it seems that "the shadow" is a popular, if not trendy, topic lately.) Also like you, I feel confusion about the varying messages that these videos send out, and feel very frustrated, at times. Watching this video has helped me understand the shadow better than many others; it's not a "quick fix", I don't think there is such a thing (" take this one pill \ watch this one video and you will be healed!); it takes work; as Vita, duchesse de Boheme once said, " Life is the ultimate, do it yourself \ self- help project." My theory is that there are so many different philosophies \ religions \ political parties \ self-help theories, all trying to get our attention (think of that eager 10 year old, the one who knows the answer to teachers question, waving their arms and shouting "I know! I know!"; now picture a roomful of those kids. That's my analogy of life.) No wonder so many people avoid self-examination - it's too confusing, with no guarantee that we will "get it right," and life is the one subject that we definitely, desperately want to get right. Ever been at a large, all you can eat buffet and feeling so overwhelmed that you take only a small portion of one dish? Any way, to finally get to some kind of point : I wonder if it's not always a question of making the right, but that we make a decision. Search, study, examine, yes, but in the end, choose what appears to work and proceed from there. Back in the '90's the phrase " Jump and the net will appear" was popular; it always sound a little to glib. I said this to a "New Age" friend one day, and they replied, "Well, who says that you can't jump back?" Put things in perspective for me. Thank you for reading this rambling dissertation; I will close by wishing you joy in your journey through life.

Best explanation I've ever heard of this concept. Extremely insightful and helpful. Thank-you, Professor.

One of the best projection explanations on this platform. Thank you, sir.

One of the best lectures I have EVER watched 👏👏👏

Thank you for the clear and interesting explanation. I've heard and read a lot about the shadow but it's mostly been either clear OR interesting and it's really nice to have both. The part about paying special attention when we find ourselves both irritated and jealous of someone was particularly helpful. Great talk in general

I was told a lot i am rude, selfish, lazy, and inappropriate just being myself. Still am sometimes. I help when i want to but not when i cant or am not comfortable with what i am being asked to do. I suffer a lot for being me. But it's worth it

The clearest and most practical explanation of what the shadow is in the first place without it appearing as psychological gobbledygook.

This man just gave me the answer I was looking for soooo long. Literally, made a shift into my conciseness. Thank you so much Sir! ☺️🙏❤️

@Dshatila1983

3 жыл бұрын

Congratulations🙏🏼🙏🏼

@Fire-Queen

Жыл бұрын

@MariaSergheevici what was your question?

Wonderful talk Dr. Mortenson, I have been waiting for this talk for a long time now. You're just one of the few professors ever to seem to understand all people surrounding you and try your best to add value to their lives by helping them overcome their biggest fears. I'm really proud that I was one of your students.

@sterlingsilver3694

3 жыл бұрын

@@theantsaretakingover who cares?

@anthonythompson12

3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for Sharing... I care...

@floaterfilms1976

Жыл бұрын

@@sterlingsilver3694 And i'm the Professor's son, you mind not back handing my cousin like that.

This has just helped me with some abuse that has caused severe C-PTSD

@Steph-hk7ik

3 жыл бұрын

Just a suggestion...perhaps read The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford for more insight on this subject.

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Queen of the Butterflies please check out Manley P Hall on the personality and Gabor Mate .. you will be able to help yourself

@queenofthebutterflies5212

3 жыл бұрын

@@winsomecohall2250 @Steph 🙏 Bless you both, thankyou Xx

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Queen of the butterflies I was diagnosed with schizophrenia bipolar ptsd depression..mental breakdown and here I AM totally free but it’s long work to get to this place .. Liberated ..I valued all that happened to me .. I made it my friend and value it .. fear guilt shame anxiety etc all became my friend.. Dr Gabor Mate open my eyes to childhood truama .. Carl Jung showed me my shadow self .. Robert Sapolsky showed me how my brain works , Manly P Hall showed me how personality works ..

Omg, why don't KZread and tedx highlight this talk. I guess Half of the other nonsense on KZread won't be viewed then.. lmao.. Clearly in my top 10 tedx talks ever ❤️❤️🙏🙏

I'm in my early 40s now and have finally found my power to say no, how to set up boundaries, and to stop caring how people may judge me for it.

Very accessible description of the shadow. Nice work.

Great examples and clarity on this subject! I recognize my own struggles with this and have found it requires regular maintenance. I stopped asking for help when I found myself being punished for it in a toxic family structure. It's tough to navigate sometimes.

Thankyou I needed to hear this ! Now I’m gonna try and be more aware of my behaviour 💐👍🏼☮️

I have learned more from this video about myself in a few minutes than in a lifetime. Thank you for explaining this so well. I took notes.

My SO is the one who does this for me. He is always aggressive and over the top and it bothered me. I was never rude with him I just used to tell him what I thought. Later on I found myself saying similar things to what he was doing than what my sister used to tell me growing up… when I was about 7-13 years old. With this I realized how much I’ve changed myself due to the criticism I have received from others…

Wonderful, clear video. Definitely deserves more views!

I needed to watch this today. It clears much for me.

from my perspective this ties into what Alister Crowley said "Do As Thou Wilt" we are all different for a reason; the ALL expressing itself in various fashions

Well said, Dr. Mortenson. I really enjoyed this!

This is a truly underrated Ted Talk. Very valuable

he dropped so many gems. thank you!

This made me reflect about my self thank you 🙏

This was amazing! Thank you for sharing a great explanation. Very helpful.

They live unconsciously ; no intuition no self reflection. Thank you your identifying part of my shadow. I have an aggressive portion a rude portion sloppy portion. Angry part that needs to be displayed tactfully and maybe if they push further- the anger increases and I put a stronger boundary down. I ask as needed. Those who don't show social curtosies is part of my shadow. I take out the needed parts out of the shadow as needed. Conflict doesn't bother me. Shadow projection and unconscious communication is often seen in those who are unaware of their shadow. They project their shadow onto others. I'm gonna write a book but not now- this passive aggressive behavior is in my awareness. My father showed his unwillingness to help others paint wood by painting the brick. Someone cleaned it up. He was never asked by anyone to paint again. I understand why he felt he belonged on the golf course instead of painting. Those who criticize others criticize themselves exponentially.

Incredible talk on the shadow, thank you so much

All the insights you brought up in the lecture on the subject of the shadow I saw in me. You helped me a lot to understand the way I need to drive to improve myself. I must watch the lecture again. Thanks

Great session! So easily explained with examples. Thank you very much!

I really enjoyed the talk.

Brilliantly Helpful 🙏👏🏻

Thank you for answering MY NEEDS when I demand your love.

This was truly excellent - clear, practical, and concise. Thank you 🌸

wow maybe the best ted talk ever. really powerful.

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Melis Soyaslanova please check out Dr Gabor mate on when the body says no and Manly P Hall on the personality

@mikelisteral7863

2 жыл бұрын

ted talk: everyone is insane.

The best explanation of shadow work out there. Thank you!

Amazing talk! Thank you

This is so good!! Profound and simple conveyed. 🙏🙏🙏

Truly excellent! Thank you

That's was amazing 👏I will try to put it into perspective, thanks for your lesson.

So good! Thank you so much! ❤️

Thanks for sharing! I loved the content and how it was delivered.

Wow! A real eye opener. I really needed to hear this. I have been on a roller coaster of emotions because of this pandemic. I have been short tempered, angry and emotional. This talk really helps me to understand a lot about my unmet needs as a child. Thank you and god bless everyone. ❤️🙏

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Gisele Font please check out Dr Gabor on when the body says no and Manly P Hall on the personality these will help you

@giselefont2548

3 жыл бұрын

@@winsomecohall2250 thank you for the info. Is it on KZread? I really appreciate your help. Have a blessed day. ❤️🙏

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

Gisele Font it’s all there on utube Dr Gabor is very good he talk about his life experience he is very open..

@lamagiduneinstant76

Жыл бұрын

~”Never do anything that you don’t want to do.” -GOD (Think about why) “Conversations with God”

100% accurate. But it is a lesson that I have become aware of and now setting boundaries.

Simple and POWERFUL truth💗🙌🙏

You are a great wisdom keeper in my mind.

aMAZING TALK

Very enlightening specially the examples how helpfulness etc is working as a shadow self

thank youuuuu!!!! i am working my shadow and its hard ... being an assertive person also hard in convent so again, thank you

That's a great video, thank you for sharing.

so beautiful, Thank you so much

Love ya my Brother!!! Great Stuff!!!

Love this

Thank you so much for sharing this video. I've been wanting and needing to work on my shadow self for quite some time and now after watching this i believe I'm confident enough to be able to do my shadow work today so excited thanks so much. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

@gaurav3290

Жыл бұрын

Hey, did you do shadow work for yourself? Share your experience please

So true So many people should watch this

Thank you for this👍

great & objective explanation

The shadow is all the aspects that we hate about ourselves. The answer in within yourself. Look within.

This is FANTASTIC. Anyone have more resources? I'd love to learn more, especially about positive projection: like idealizing someone.

@sterlingsilver3694

3 жыл бұрын

Would love to share more information. Let me know the best way to give that to you

@winsomecohall2250

3 жыл бұрын

starksoldier please check out Dr Gabor Mate on when the body says no and Manly p Hall on the personality

Beautiful talk thank you.

An excellent talk. Thank you.

This is awesome thank you

The real down to the point with what your saying is « fear of the opinions of others. » and refusing to see what we really want or don’t want to do… And specially a huge lack of love for others.. Just being you is what count and either the others or best friend etc etc don’t agree it’s their way of perceiving what you really are … helping others should come from the heart without being forced to do so if you don’t feel it’s the right thing well it should come from your heart…

5 mins in....incredible talk.

My God...You just changed my life.

Brilliant 👏👏👏👏🔥💕✨ Meditating on this . Thank You 🙏

Awesome, that was great! At first your voice was annoying, but of course that was just my projection! Explained well, thankyou for sharing ♥🌈

this is ART. i’m happy i learned something new

@mikelisteral7863

2 жыл бұрын

ted talk: everyone is insane.

That is one good watch Love it 🥰

Dealing w this today in my own shadow work process. It's uncomfortable but gives me so much self compassion, which is what it turns out I was needing. The things I judge in others are things I have rejected in myself. Every time. The things I admire in others are things in me. Always.

awesome talk !!!!!!!!!!

@sc-ek6qz

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah!

Brilliant! 🥰

thank you

this is so helpful ha ha , but yeah its given me a total epiphany about myself ,amazing thanks.

@sterlingsilver3694

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing the word epiphany

@PB-mp7qt

3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for that, I didn't even notice.

This dude's son makes GREAT ytps

Great talk thank u

This guy is like a non comedy, non pervy version of Louis CK....real easy to listen to. Good talk dude. 👍👍

Now I understand psychologically why I identify people who make me annoyed with me. You know, the people who hold up that mirror to you while you secretly think, 'is THAT how I act?!' But they don't even know it. 😂😂 explains a lot.

Great great talk

very powerful 🔥

I am in this process now.

Excellent

I think it's good to know what you want, sometimes you get it sometimes you don’t, If you don't know then other people decide for you mostly.

You spot it you got it.Don't who said it but it's true.

I understand personal relationships but I feel I have a lot of issues around institutions/school/work. I don’t feel I project my shadow onto people but as I have mentioned school/institutions of power/work and I have no clue how to go about reclaiming this power.

Signs/Sources of Shadow: When feel disapproving or envy: unmet needs or disowned parts of self When feel judged without hearinf words: self judgement

I notice if someone does something I have shadow material about it only really annoys me if everyone else says it's okay or let's it go by.I feel like why one rule for them an another for me.If everyone else says they are doing wrong I,m okay with it.

When disapprove or envy: our unmet needs and ignored negative sides When feel judged without direct accusations: then self judgement

Hate is a natural response for dealing with suffering caused by other peoples unconscious narcissism, straw manning, projection and so on.

Very Nice ❤