I just completed a 10 page research paper on this topic for my Social Work class. I wanted to choose something that was important and that nobody else would choose. I was overwhelmed with all the information I learned. Holy Cow! This is unbelievably sad and need to be talked about more in Social Work, at both the undergraduate and graduate level, due to the amount of children and target parents that experience this each year. Family Court needs an overhaul!

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for watching. What tips from the video were most helpful in your research?

@onlyme436

5 ай бұрын

This is so good to see. Someone training to be a social worker and interested in parental alienation, i hope you can make a change for future generations. . It seems childrens services are anti men, not all men are scumbags. Good luck.

It created so much pain for my children. She (ex wife) actively tried to erase me, got the children involved in that, and completely cut me out of their lives. I'm a teacher, shes from a supposedly professional background. I was smeared to the nth degree, and their friends and family were manipulated into it to. My children have been so so hurt .. and yes, we ended up falling out. It's been 14 years, they have nothing to do with me now .. I now have boundaries to keep me emotionally safe. And the new guy, he also actively threatens me. It's awful. I was / am a good loving father, have always been there for them intimately, physically, financially etc. Yes, it absolutely WAS and still is alienation, and the children are estranged from me. My son was aggressive towards me, my daughter stopped calling me dad. Both of them have little to no regard for me as a parent. Theyve adopted scenarios, and they rationalized normal parenting as me having been abusive. My poor children .. and now its safer for them to remain status quo.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching and commenting.

@Nomad

2 жыл бұрын

My twisted baby momma and the guy that engaged to her a few months after being "serious" wasted no time in coursing our daughter, who's gonna be 2 years old may 16 into calling him dad, daddy. my baby was calling me daddy not even a month earlier. They rub it in my face, sent my video clips of her saying it to him, it's all disturbingly staged. They mentally torture me and seemingly get gratification from it. My baby momma plays both sides, she secretly talks with me, tells me shit like this is temporary and I'll see them soon. I know what she's doing is wrong and that she's manipulating and controlling me so I don't get her in trouble for this... I'm so afraid of her completely cutting me off for I may never see my daughter again if I fuck up and set her off. I don't know what to do.

@nettom7575

2 жыл бұрын

Tnx 4 sharing. . .

@HelsinkiFINketeli_berlin_com

Жыл бұрын

I have lost 4 children altogether for the two mothers and my advice for the young males is DO NOT make a single child until there is a world where children have their right to their fathers, and have their other rights and freedoms respected, and where the institutions and professions mainly in the habds of the women cannot be weaponized by the women and the children cannot be objectified to be the projects of their mothers, and abused and manipulated by their mothers despite all the constitutions and legislations and the international agreements and whatsoever there is. As the Who put it: "Better leave her behind when the kids are alright".

@larrycaldwell3673

Жыл бұрын

Same here

Having been alienated for many years from my now adult daughter, it is, without a doubt absolutely devastating! The pain doesn’t lessen with each passing year, in fact gets worse as the hopelessness seems to be winning!!!

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching

@sarahloveslux2344

Жыл бұрын

😓🙏🏼💔

@lynnschaeferle-zh4go

4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry. I try to think of worse things to experience but when the manipulation happens before you know, how do you know? How do we know that the other parent is a monster until we are faced with the betrayal?

@annak29

Ай бұрын

I am so sorry you are experiencing this. Please look up Dr Childress blog and books. He has the only valid framework for description, classifications, and effective therapeutic approach for you, the "chosen parent" to do internal work and reunite.

What good is the information if the courts could not care less? They are actually assisting the alienation most of the time.

Thank you Dr Snipes. The title of this hits home for me. I haven't seen my father in 20 years. I don't even know if he's still alive. He'd be 81 so probably not. I haven't seen my sister in the same and ironically I got word that she passed away last week. She was extremely abusive to me as a child and in the last few years I've been studying mental health and I've come to the painful realization that what she did affected me greatly. I've struggled in every aspect of life and over the last few years I've developed a deep hatred for her. I didn't hate her as a child really. I thought it was normal for siblings to hate each other but after I got out on my own not only did I see siblings not hating each other I actually seen many care about each other. It was a culture shock for sure. I always thought I was going to celebrate her death but after I heard she passed I wasn't happy at all. In fact I was quite sad about it. I'm not sad enough to cry over it nor am I going back for the funeral but I'm definitely not happy about it. I always did want to confront her about what she did to me and tell her how it affected me all these years and how I hated her for it. I have a strong suspicion that someone was abusing her at the same time because some of the things she did to me I don't see how a girl of her age would have known unless someone was doing it to her. This was in the early 1980s and there was no internet so I'm pretty sure someone was doing it to her. And what's really hard to deal with is that she did try calling me about 3 years ago. I hung up on her and changed my phone number. I have no idea what she wanted. Maybe she realized what she did and wanted forgiveness. That's just wasn't her style though. She was a very mean nasty abusive person. It was quite astonishing how she could control it. In public she could be really polite kind and caring but once she got behind closed doors she would turn into a totally different person. Suprisingly she did find a guy to marry her and she abused him both physically and mentally as well. And he was a really good guy. A hard worker, a super nice guy and great provider. It boggles my mind to this day how you could abuse someone who did everything under the sun to love and take care of you. I really do wish I would have taken her phone call 3 years ago and at least given her a chance to speak. Not taking that call will probably be one of the biggest regrets of my life. I'm sorry for going on so long. I just felt like I needed to get this off my chest

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing.

@Kim-kw7fo

2 жыл бұрын

I completely hear what you are saying. I am currently taking small steps yo find my Dad. My last memory of him was him in a hospital bed. I think I was about 6 or 7?? I am 52 now. He woukd be 74 now. Reasons for him beibg our of my life after my parents separated are unknown. Heartbreaking.

@mwitten3

2 жыл бұрын

P

@kimlec3592

2 жыл бұрын

@ Kurt : i abandoned my brother & cared for my mother - i was convinced by her & everyone it was right. it was not. i was totally brainwashed & controlled by my mother. my brother died 20 years ago. age 32. Try to forgive yourself & them for being human. it is rough.

@steveadiska6834

Жыл бұрын

This is all so very sad, and unfortunate. Families are meant to be a blessing. And home a safe, fun and happy place to grow and be a child. Give and receive unconditional love.

This is my root cause of all my problems, thanks dad.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

This is THE best video about Alienating Parents & the effect on their children in the entire KZread world! Thank you for this

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

You’re so welcome. Thank you so much for watching. What are your favorite tips from the video?

Thank you, I never knew there were words for this.

@starryeyedbrea

2 жыл бұрын

I didn’t either for a long time. I’m impressed it’s being covered here. Search Craig Childress, Amy Baker, to start. People need to know about PA.

@Annie-Dom

2 жыл бұрын

@@starryeyedbrea This is profound for me! My kids grew up in this! This is a real thing! I'm not crazy!!

@starryeyedbrea

2 жыл бұрын

@@Annie-Dom no, you most likely are not crazy-- although if you have dealt with this sort of stuff you've no doubt been subject to being intentionally made to feel or think you're the problem, or that you are nuts. It's great to hear that you've found something that helps give your experiences some explanation/validation.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

I am glad you found the video helpful. Thanks to everyone for watching.

this is so validating for me. you have everything I've been trying to explain was happening and as a result of is still severely affecting my children

You are saving my life and this, my daughter’s life! Oh thank you!!!

Bravo!! Doc., Your message and presentation was clear precise to the point identifiable and informative in every aspect. I think you need to know that. I actually enjoyed listening to you speak until the end and that,s rare. Please Provide more with this type of approach it’s definitely a winner thanks again

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching and commenting.

I so appreciate the way you stop and choose your words - fantastic modeling Doc and you make it look easy.

@DocSnipes

6 ай бұрын

Thank you so much. I am grateful to be of service

Thank you so much for posting this!

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Welcome

I believe a good indication is that, because time heals all wounds, if it’s been over a year and the other parent is still badmouthing the non-abusive parent, that’s a glaring red flag and shouldn’t be ignored. We have to be hyper vigilant and keep track of any patterns and consistencies.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

The question is, what can you do about it, how do you stop it?

It just blows my away the manipulation and the ability of these parents to paint a false picture of the other parent.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

@RASAAH777

2 жыл бұрын

Bitter Baby Momma? Take her to court

This was excellent. And informative. Thank you!!

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

You are so welcome!

Wow thank you so much. For 18 months my wife will not let kids visit me, or any of my family, or any of our Common friends. They keep posting negative comments on social media, she is trying to change children last name. My kids stopped texting me, or answer the phone. You described exactly what I'm see her do. Thank you, now I know what's going on.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

So sorry to hear. 😞 Wishing you peace, health, and, happiness.

Fantastic video. completely validating.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Glad it was helpful!

My Children are now adults, in their thirties. The behaviors you described were what we endured by their Father, StepMother and Grandparents back in the late 80’s and on. It’s been a long road and we’re still struggling to a place of wholeness. Thank you for posting this video. 🙏🏼

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

@mimimincer525

2 жыл бұрын

I am praying for you. This is a painful journey. I pray you be at peace. ❤🙏❤

Totally explains my life experience but first time have heard it being explained . Invaluable and now I can begin process more with this knowledge. Thankyou so much.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

I am sorry to hear that, but you are most welcome. Sending healing thoughts.

@MsVivian99

2 жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes thankyou so much

Our narc has set up a system of rewards and punishments when the children do things that harm mom or seem to express support for mom. A child who lied about something that led to visitations being removed for 2 months (against the court order) was gifted a $1500 gaming laptop, for example.

@ AllCeus counseling education… thank you. This is one of the better parental Allienation videos etc. I have watched/studied. 🤔❤️

@LatoriaLolaThompson

2 жыл бұрын

❤️

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Awww. Ty so much.

Thank you, Dr. Snipes. This presentation was cohesive and can be understood by all. Great job.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Glad it was helpful!

18 years of this campaign against me. She wins and I have to give up now. I fought this and was able to keep my head above the water. 3 years ago, they stopped talking to me altogether. I am not sure if they will ever get past the manipulations their mother put them through or not. There were 2 or more markers from each slide they went through. I cannot do this anymore. They're 18-22 now, both latchkey to her. I have had joint custody since leaving the army and 3+ years ago, I stopped "forcing" them to come over for my parenting time.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you all peace, health, and happiness. Videos returned by this search of my channel might help if you want to process more on parenting. kzread.infosearch?query=parenting

@mimimincer525

2 жыл бұрын

I pray you find peace, it's hard but possible! ❤🙏❤

@hannaheye

2 жыл бұрын

There is a lot of great information for people like you on KZread. Personally I have a parenting coach about my adult alienated child but there is also a lot of free help out there. So much you can do, actually, that feels good and not draining.

@bluemoon8268

2 жыл бұрын

... honestly, they are old enough this point to make their own choices ... if I was you, I would approach them as the young adults they are and try to encourage them to go to counseling with you to rebuild your relationship ...

@thatsdoctorevil

2 жыл бұрын

@@bluemoon8268 Thank you. To be perfectly honest, they're not acting in any normal way. They don't respond to anything. twice in the last 4 years one of them reached out. Because mom wanted me to pay the copay for a surgery, she wouldn't have needed if mom had provided the dental care she was obligated to. Before you think this was some sort of playing games. Their mother was supposed to provide the dental and I the medical. Not even a problem for me to do this. - they're my kids too. OK, that said, Mom would constantly cut me out of every aspect by making it so monumental of a task to get the answers or to stay involved... For instance, School - my oldest was struggling, because her mother never enforced structure or making her do her homework. When she was at my house, it was a monumental struggle too (why? Because mom was a teacher in the school district and instead of making our oldest do her homework, she made excuses and her peers let her slide). What happens then is that these teachers don't send 2 report cards, don't send me invites or contact me for PTCs. I can only speculate what she would tell them that made them think that somehow my joint custody made her more of a parent and me less of one, but I would have to start to struggle to get report cards. What would you do? Fight? So, you're going to fight the school, the teachers, then dentists, doctors, ...you get the point. You're now the bad guy, because they're doing what they think is right based on what Mom told them about me and the situation. The children aren't going to disagree or do anything to make their mother displeased/disappointed in them. Back to the surgery - understanding that I was always playing catch-up and discovering damages after the fact. I discovered that despite being told otherwise - by both children too - that they had not been seeing the dentist. My oldest, unfortunately inherited some of my facial structure. crowding teeth. Had she been seeing the dentist, as I had in my youth, she would have had the 8 teeth she needed removed and space would have allowed the expansion her other teeth needed to spread out. instead - as was warned to me when I was a kid - oh, and I am a medical professional too - oldest daughter's teeth came in crowding, creating pressure that caused the roof/hard palate of her mouth to basically fold up - think like a pup-tent. How I found this out, because we would order pizza on every other Friday they were with me - I had every other day and every other weekend. My youngest and I would have thin crust - oldest had to have pan/thick crust. I found out when she explained to me that she only eats pan, because her front teeth do not close to let her bite. I am the bad guy for being mad? I had to find a surgeon to do the procedure, because most people don't let their kids get to this point. The procedure was rare and only one guy in town could and would do it. I am the bad guy, because I made Mom pay all of the co-pays. This later has my oldest saying that I am neglecting her by punishing mom... Yes. Absurdity is part of why they don't even acknowledge messages, answer calls, - I don't deserve to be acknowledged as being the other parent - not even to be acknowledged that I exist and deserve the smallest respect that anyone deserves. so - I am not holding on to hope anymore. Sometimes throwing all of this out here is cathartic - sometime it isn't. tonight I get to feel the hole this has left me with

When you are the targeted parent it is the worst feeling ever and knowing that all of these damaging factors are going to have such a horrific impact on the whole family . ( the alienator although - is immune because they tend to be the ones whom win over the children’s love and affection )

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video

Thank you for clarifications.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

You are welcome!

you covered every characteristic of an alienator.

Dr. Snipes, love your presentations. You should put out a book with all this material, this a treasure trove of information. Can you do a mindfulness methods presentation?

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for the kind words. Here are some videos I have done on mindfulness kzread.infosearch?query=mindful%20awareness

Thank you for this.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

My pleasure!

Thank you! Thank you!

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

If you are a targeted parent, know that if your child is severely alienated, there is little to 0 chance of you ever having a healthy relationship. My daughter estranged from me at 12, and we are now in estrangement 4. Little care, study or research for targeted parents. Being targeted, I can say the pain and grief is nearly impossible to bear. I oft wonder how much different, possibly better, both lives would be if I just walked away 20 years ago.

@hannaheye

2 жыл бұрын

That isn't true. Where did you get that statistic? A huge number of alienated children return to the targeted parent, at the very least by their late 20s or early 30s. And there is much you can do to "attract" them back. I have personally met adults who were alienated as children who figured it out. Some kids figure it out before they become adults... especially if the parent gets good intervention and does their own healing work.

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

@@hannaheye Mine didn't, they now are age 40 and 42

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

I am deeply sorry that you've went through this. I know exactly where you are coming from bc I have lived it for years. I'm 62 now and there seriously is no resolution. It's been heartbreaking beyond words!. I've tried and tried to no avail. I had no idea a name for this existed! Even though it doesn't present any hope it's finally answered so many questions I've had for years and years.

@bhorleston

Жыл бұрын

@@hannaheye it's not a fairy tail world where everything works out in the end. When alienators keep abusing and proffesionals facilitate it and validate it, you have no chance

@mukkaar

4 ай бұрын

​@@hannaheyeI mean yeah, but that doesn't really fix anything. That parenthood is gone and you have years of pain. At most you get some type of closure. I don't mean to trivialize talking things out, but if that childhood and parenthood is not there, you are coming together as adults to resolve the situation. To me it just doesn't feel like a parent child thing at that point.

Thank you.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

So welcome! I appreciate you watching. Other videos you might be interested in can be found at: kzread.infosearch?query=ACES

Awesome video thanks so much for the great information! :-)

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Welcome

@jesseskellington9427

2 жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes by chance do you know what playlist this is from in your KZread channel? :-)

Let's cover childhood into adulthood

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

I would love to see Doc Snipes cover this

I want to raise awareness about parental alienation, as a mother of four children I am slowly being alienated from them by my narcissistic and manipulative ex-husband and he loves hurting me and in the long run he’s hurting our children. I want to be able to public speak about this issue and like I said bring awareness, I am in Connecticut, can you please or someone please tell me how to be an advocate or start my own group. Please let me know ASAP. Thank you.

@angelfortruth12

Жыл бұрын

I’m dealing with the same. The point the last does nothing

@annak29

Ай бұрын

Please find Dr Childress' blog and research, books. Also, "End Parental Alienation" KZread channel. They have this as their cause.

She is smart!!! This is so true! People get mad in divorce and no one is perfect and both parties say things but this is ONGoing INSIDIOUS twisting and manipulating to turn the child away from the parent.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I appreciate you watching

Thankyou Thankyou

@DocSnipes

5 ай бұрын

You’re most welcome! Thanks for watching

Thank youuuuuu🥰🙏

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Welcome

Very helpful information

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Ty

So much of this correlates with how children respond to an emotionally abusive parent, I wonder how many parents have been accused of alienating a spouse who has actually alienated themselves because of their own behaviour and actions towards their child.

@merriemerrie7378

2 жыл бұрын

Not really, kids that have been neglected or mistreated tend to act very differently from kids who have been alienated. When kids interact with a normally available parent with a superior, haughty or arrogant attitude; act as if entitled to judge that parent, show a decided lack of empathy and see the rejected parent as irredeemably inadequate (and the approved parent as faultless) - they are displaying symptoms of alienation. Kids who have been emotionally abused tend to long for the abusive parent to treat them better. They are not inclined to display symptoms of narcissism.

@ronesss33

2 жыл бұрын

@@merriemerrie7378 oh god this is me. This is what I did to my father and I’m only just realising it at age 51. I have no idea how to handle it as it’s been too long and he gave up on me when I was a child. My mental and physical health has always been bad and my mother is still causing chaos even though she is unwell herself with cancer. She has turned on me and has the whole family convinced I am abusing and neglecting her in her time of need. They always believe her over me or anyone else. I just can’t fix it now it’s too late.

Thanks for the information i wish the system or a law can be passed to protect children from this abuse . But will fight for my children. Its difficult when the narc is supported , believed, and its tough when people don’t believe mind control brainwashing is real. I pray more support systems a safe space and places-will be established for the alienated parent and siblings and for the targeted child.

@DocSnipes

2 ай бұрын

You’re most welcome. Thank you for watching the video and for sharing

What can the alienated parent do when the child is now well into adulthood, no matter what you say or do, you will be seen as the enemy. your beloved, yet brainwashed child is running on autopilot and still playing the program of hate? It's so heartbreaking to see the pain they are in from years of being used and exploited by the other parent and not be able to comfort them because they believe you have no value, believe a host of revisions to history, and are only validated by the other adults involved when they agree with the alienators plan and match their contempt hatred and warped vision that every effort or action must be twisted to prove you are a villain. no matter how much you love them, no matter how much you want to connect, how much you want to heal the harm done to your connection. Every day your heart breaks a bit more worrying about your estranged child,wishing for a way to restore your bond, aching for the goodness and the good opportunities and potential memories you were cheated out of. It's all consuming to lose a child like this and realize that someone has exploited, used abused and harmed your child and shortchanged your child out of loving and being loved by their own adoring parent.

Great topic

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching the video. What did you find most useful from it?

@Lion-1.

Жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes I think identifying it is helpful.

Regardless of all the research and knowledge available on this issue the courts, schools, healthcare providers and law enforcement still actively collaborate with and support the alienating parent in their abuse. It's crazy!

@DocSnipes

7 ай бұрын

Thank you for watching and for sharing

This. How succinct in explanation. My (now adult) child has suffered so very much as a result of this horrifying abuse. And they are still under the influence and 100% dependent upon the alienating parent and their supporting if unaware grandmother I see no end in sight and may pass away completely estranged. It's important to understand the underlying motive of my child's alienating parent -- and this is and remains the pathogen of narcissism and narcissistic abuse -- which I escaped but my child suffers even as I type. How helpless and heartbreaking is this heinous situation. My heart goes out to all fellow targeted parents. Hang in there and know you are not alone, alas.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching!

Great video. Perhaps a video on 1. How the alienated parent / grandparent can or should respond to/counteract the abuse in a way that is helpful to the child. 2. A video on how the alienated parent can restore a relationship with an adult child who still suffers from the abuse and is completely or partially alienated from the parent. 3. A video on the effects of abandonment ( whether perceived or actual) compounded by parental alienation of the abandoning parent. Thank you. Since PA is very widespread and common I think courts should insist on training for both divorcing parents on how to prevent parental alienation before the final custody or parental care and control agreement is finalised. Both parents and children should then be reassessed to determine whether one parent is responsible for causing alienation and remedial steps taken. In my experience as an Advocate and personally, there is usually a form of parental alienation already occurring before the divorce, with the most powerful parent in the relationship constantly undermining/belittling or abusing the other in front of the children. So then it continues after the divorce, with the children already set up to despise the weaker parent.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I appreciate you watching the video and an grateful for your suggestions. What did you find most helpful from the video?

@carolgivati7372

Жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes the general way you explained the information was useful.

Nice gratefully, to be so enlightened about things that happened unexplainably all those years ago. In the end, makes you glad to have turned the other cheek. But that's like rescuing a part of oneself. Society together as a whole must break the trans-generational traumatic cycle. Fortunate including less fortunate. Big multi-faceted investment. Big multi-faceted gains.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

I have 50/50joint legal and parental alienation seems to be apart of my life with son. I think from age 1to 4 years old. She had plenty of time to work on my son behavior towards me. He loves me but he loooooves her she take him some where every weekend. So that makes what I do not be appreciated at all. It hurts knowing he's not aware of how he's being manipulated

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

Both of my parents demonized each other, after they divorced, in their own ways. My mother said that when my sisters and I were little, my father would tell us that she was crazy and use her humor or her odd behaviors as proof and get us in on the joke. My mother in turn went into many details of my fathers issues causing the divorce and expressed passive anger and hurt when we would talk about having fun with our father. My dads mom and sister participated frequently in painting an ugly picture of my mother. My mother kept my sisters and I quite isolated for years of our lives because she had no trustworthy family or friends to trust around us. She’d bounce back and forth lamenting about my dad and reminding us that he loved us even though he left. It was a chaotic struggle for the truth and now even as an adult, I still don’t know who or what to believe about anything, and my own perception of reality has been severely invalidated, so I’m not keen to trust myself either. Learning about this honestly gives me breathing room to just say “my whole family is a toxic mess, and I’d rather seek making my own family via close friends.”

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching

I live a situation of parental alienation on my skin by 4 years now. After the separation i've try a legal trial, but the italian law don't recognize parental alienation as crime, and in the fact, the court recognize the problem, but have no solution for this. This is 4th year i dont see and hear my soon in any way. I've try everything in my possibility, try to call, try to meet, give each month money for maintenance, but this is not enought. No solution at this time. Each day make me frustration and pain. I hope they grow up and can ask themselves some questions.

@mbee6256

4 ай бұрын

I’m sorry. I hope this has gotten better for you since you wrote this

I genuinely believe my story and the difference in dynamics can help in the residual affects . please I have to find a way to show them the path. back to me.

Sometimes kids will refuse to go with one of their parents, even though nothing bad happened with that parent. What do you do, if the kid just refuses to go? Sometimes there is nothing you can do. I support mostly fathers on their journey and it is of course a big game changer for them, having somebody who can mantain an overview with them, give them guidance so they don't get lost in this whole mess. But manipulated kids can sometimes be very hard to deal with.

Wow this me and my ex to the T !!! I believer her childhood and upbringing had a HUGE effect on the foul things she’s been doing to and my daughter.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

I've been alienated from my two young girls and almost everything in what you have mentioned has happened. I really wish there was some way to prove this though!

@DocSnipes

9 ай бұрын

Being alienated from your two young girls is awful and I am sorry that happened to you. Thank you for watching the video

@alistairmccabe7028

9 ай бұрын

@DocSnipes The worst thing about it is I'm a fantastic parent, I have a 20 year old son to someone else and never in that time have myself and his mother had a problem, we've always got along and I've always been there for my son. The girls mother has completely turned them against me and why I don't actually no, other than control because this all started after I called her out for talking to me badly as she has done for years and she didn't like it. It's not just me she has alienated them from either, it's their brother cousins and the rest of my entire family and friends. Just so awful. Thanks for your message.

What can be done to help an adult child of 33 years of age heal from parental alienation

@hannaheye

2 жыл бұрын

There are adult children of alienation online who are now coaches. You could consult with them. Off the top of my head, one in Australia who started an organization called Eenie Meenie Minie Moe (sp?) and also The Conscious Coparenting institute was started by a formerly alienated child.

This is very interesting. Humans are so complex and I don't think most people want to even take the time to explore their histories for many many reasons. Could this video be applied to Grandparental alienation? Not on the same scale as parents of course but grandparents are important in a childs life.

@denalraab

2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely.

Feelings were not allowed for the kids. only rage from parents.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

Do you know of any therapist in Maryland who could help me with this ? Great presentation btw, concise and to the point. Thank you

@Maria_9789

2 жыл бұрын

Yes,i need an online therapist who would know about this. I am adult child of divorced parents. I don't know if i alienated my father. I was 8. I feel too much guilt.

How can you present to the adult child the evidence and affects of PA as applied to them? Being the alienated parent my introduction to the idea comes off as a defense to what the child was told to think about me.

Mom does the work and dad plays video games. Mom has to work so dad takes the kids on vacation. I knew the alienation was complete when he flew out to meet our new granddaughter. We don’t like mom, do we? Mom’s crazy. Daddy has a personality disorder but he’s always perfectly calm. And smart! He managed to make me look stupid. And isolated. He smeared me everywhere. Anyone left looks at my ex family and they assume there’s a problem with me, even if they’ve known me for years. But what can you expect when I never loved my kids? And that’s what I really resent. I put every effort and sacrificed. They don’t remember having a mom their whole lives, caring and committed. So listen up non parents; it’s not worth it. I wasted 2/3 of my life and I will continue with this pain that doesn’t get better. As a side note the psycho grew up with a stepmom and stepsister who he hated. Now I see he hates women and I got the payback. I can hear the teenage manipulating voice and see the mean girl behavior and it really works and is absurd in a man. But it works with teenagers

@DocSnipes

4 ай бұрын

Thank you for watching the video and for sharing

Abandonment - totally.

If you suspect a child is struggling with elements of parental alienation, what therapies are useful? Does it require psychiatric care, trauma focused care? And what if the child is still at home, say mid-teens?

@ilovehotmoms5804

2 жыл бұрын

My question exactly.

@patriciakimani3760

2 жыл бұрын

A child therapist should be able to give guidance

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

An assessment is called for at the least. Possibly check with divorce attorneys regarding therapists in your area that work with PAS, it is not something that every therapist knows about.

@denalraab

2 жыл бұрын

Honestly, MOST therapists don't really know much about it...even if they think that they do. Because of the contradictory manifestations in the children - and the reactive manifestations of the targeted parent - and the perceptions of each of them, when (but mostly 'IF') someone recognizes what's happening (and HAS been happening), they have a certain amount of cognitive dissonance, themselves. So, most outsiders do nothing...and many (including, but not limited to) therapists. Many of the standard therapies are actually counterproductive to treating families affected by this. For severe cases, it is recommended that the children are removed from the environment of alienating parent. All family members need therapy; for a myriad of reasons which are unique to each family dynamic. Honestly, if you are looking for a therapist who claims to have experience with parental alienation, I would ask them if they have ever, personally, experienced the emotional ramifications of it. If the answer if 'no'...move on.

@jesseskellington9427

2 жыл бұрын

Children's hospital mental health department has never heard of Parental alienation as of 2021

Yup; "here it is".

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

Requested Video about shame/blame circuit. Dealing with the hormones of aldosterone then cortisol to trigger nitric oxide. Where by having negative thoughts creating inflammation in the negative-person but once it's assigned to an other as a target of shame/blame. Then the negative-thought-person gets nitric oxide dump. This reduces their inflammation from aldosterone and cortisol of their negative-thought process/es. Some people call this Narcissistic-Supply.

@janabethp5043

2 жыл бұрын

Brown , Brené

@jesseskellington9427

2 жыл бұрын

@@janabethp5043 She doesn't talk about it at the neurological, hormonal level. That's what I'm looking for. I agree her work is excellent on the shame and blame category.

Having gone thru this and still going thru it. If openly this is studied and documented then why are the courts and profesionals not address this as child abuse and arrest thr alie ator?

@kimlassiter1603

Жыл бұрын

The courts and lawyers actually endorse parental Alienation as a way to perpetuate the chaos. If they solved the problem of parental Alienation, there would be no more billable hours. Family court judges and lawyers, etc. suggest doing things to alienate the targeted parent such as adding the children to alienating spouses restraining order. Not only do the court officials condone it, they encourage it, all the while denying that Parental Alienation even exist.

The "protecting from legitimate abuse" thing makes a nice lil loophole for alienators. If they can convince themselves that the other parent is legitimately abusive (especially since so many people confuse contempt in a dying relationship for the other person simply being a narcissist). Also, apparently a lot of divorce attorneys have an incredibly loose and wide definition of parental alienation that includes "allowing a new partner or stepparent to participate in caregiving". These lawyers will still try to play the alienation card even when it's the sole "alienating behavior" present. I can see the argument that it can be confusing to kids. But I feel like that is usually mitigating by clear and consistent reinforcement of the two different types of roles. And that there's probably bigger issues going on between the parent & child if the child gets confused by the other parent's new partner. Parents do sometimes reject and neglect their children. That's an unfortunate fact of life.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for watching the video and for sharing your thoughts

Doctor Snipes, Would you comment on the KZread presentations by Craig Childress, Psy.D Attachment-Based Parental Alienation These videos came out 7 years ago.

Alienating parents almost always say they are protecting the child from abuse. They make the child believe that they have been abused by the rejected parent. The trouble comes in when the false allegations of abuse aren't investigated and founded or unfounded. All an alienating parent has to do is make the allegation and it is game over. As is stands now, social workers and therapists are trained to believe the "voice" of the child, even if that voice is the result of brainwashing and coercion. The universal symptoms seen ONLY in alienated kids are ignored and/or aren't understood. The abuse is staring MHPs and yet they have no clue what they are seeing. It is unconscionable and abuse in and of itself. MHP are in many cases acting as a proxy abuser for the alienating parent and further harm the child. This MUST be recognized as the child abuse, coercive control, intimate partner violence, and family violence that it is. The time is now.

Is there anyway I can get this PowerPoint?

Dr. Snipes, this was a great video. My son's Ex did this to him for 4 years. When he hired an attorney, she suddenly decided to let him have her overnight. She was 6 yes old then. She was wearing scrunchies on her arm because she was pinching herself , and her "therapist " told her to pinch the scrunched instead. Sounded like a good idea to me until I realized that she didn't pinch herself when she was with us. Obviously only when she was with them. That makes me think that the problem is at their house, not ours. I would really like your opinion about that. Thanks!

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching and commenting.

@bluemoon8268

2 жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes ... what kind of answer is that for Gos's sake ... ?

Litigating Parental Alienation: Evaluating and Presenting an Effective Case in Court by Ashish S Joshi (Author) Publisher ‏ : ‎ ABA Book Publishing (January 1, 2021) Language ‏ : ‎ English ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1641058285 ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1641058285

@jesseskellington9427

2 жыл бұрын

Parental Alienation - Science and Law by Demosthenes Lorandos (Author), William Bernet (Author) Publisher ‏ : ‎ Charles C Thomas Pub Ltd (January 14, 2020) Language ‏ : ‎ English Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 682 pages ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0398093245 ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0398093242

@jesseskellington9427

2 жыл бұрын

Parental Alienation: The Handbook for Mental Health and Legal Professionals (Behavioral Science and Law) by Demosthenes Lorandos (Author, Editor), William Bernet (Editor), S. Richard Sauber (Editor) Publisher ‏ : ‎ Charles C Thomas Pub Ltd; Har/Cdr edition (December 13, 2013) Language ‏ : ‎ English Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 550 pages ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0398088810 ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0398088811

My son is 14 and a half. Until a couple of weeks ago I had regular catchups and zoom calls. That stopped abruptly and I have not heard once from him. He was in a 50/50 care arrangement until September this year. I don't know how to deal with this or if there is even anything I can do.

@barbaraschultz1442

2 жыл бұрын

Go to court and file for Patenting Time. When their 18 the damage is done. Courts can’t do anything. Not having time with a parent can be a felony

@mandyprescott2279

2 жыл бұрын

Go ahead and hire an attorney, if you have the means to do so. This process can be so long, but worthwhile.

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

@@mandyprescott2279 May I ask what an attorney can do?

Every single scenario mentioned Every single one It’s as if my mini-me is disappearing, sinking into the deep of the sea Or is it me sinking? I can barely see her now Just a slight remaining eye twinkle still calling me to help I’m still here my girl Forever

Is there any help for an adult child? I was married to my daughters step dad for 10 years. Just divorced Sept 2020. About 6 months before the divorce, I stated seeing strange behavior with my daughter and her husband with exact hand motions and statements like the ex. I noticed it right away but not aware of parental alienation. Then all of a sudden my daughter stopped calling me weekly to visit my grand baby. Then starting lying to me. Things basically went down hill. About a month ago her and her husband cut all contact with me. What I’ve read, you have to remove the child from the alienating parent. But how does that happen when the child is grown and in their own home? How can I keep them away from him and her an adult?

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

allceus.com/telegram-group/

There is a better way. Parental custody of children is actually a very simple matter to solve given the true desire of “What is best for the child”. We need to separate and discard marriage from family law as they no longer seem to be connected. We can develop protocols that confer (over time) equal parental rights and responsibilities,…..once parentage is proven. Children’s natural maturation process has 3 essential stages of need. A.The unconditional love of the mother from birth until about 7 years of age. The mother to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance. B.The conditional love of the father, who takes his children out into the world, gives security and teaches social boundaries from 7 until about 13 years of age. The father to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance. C.The friendship and respect of peers from 13 until 18 years of age. The child to have “thefinalsay”. If these 3 stages are not gone through in order, maturation is unlikely to be satisfactorily achieved and mental resilience reduced. This has now become generational. Such a regime of equal parenting rights (over time) would bind parents into a co-operative relationship, because (over time) each will hold the power of “thefinalsay” sequentially when they are best favoured to use it. Such family protocols would be the default position, but could in exceptional cases be varied by the court. Buckminster Fuller said:- “You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete”. To alleviate suffering is worthy. To prevent it is divine, but thankless.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

So what can I do if my ex-spouse has done many of these things, and my child is suffering psychologically? My divorce attorney has stated that in 30 years, he has never seen a case of child custody changes that resulted in a more positive experience for the child. He said it nearly always causes additional trauma more than anything else.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching

Help Doc, I have been dealing with Parental alienation since my daughter was born. Is there a way to hire you to explain how this form of abuse looks? I’m meeting with a lawyer soon.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

It will probably be more affordable for you to find an expert witness local to you. (Unless you live in Middle Tennessee or North Florida. Feel free to give you lawyer the link to the video.

@teachmetofish8710

2 жыл бұрын

@@DocSnipes okay thank you for following up and for your content

week before Christmas in litterally the span of one quick shower my daughter and my dog were gone, and he knew I knew that if I called police they would just make me out to be a monster and I'd not even try to defend because why would my children lie

@hannaheye

2 жыл бұрын

Children lie all the time. Especially teenagers. There is a lot you can do.

👏👌🙏

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching!

Can you tell us what percentage is a narcissist in the alienator population? Do they ever get more mature than a 3 year old emotionally?

@DocSnipes

4 ай бұрын

Narcissism in the Alienator Population: * It's important to clarify that specific percentages regarding the prevalence of narcissism within the alienator population are not readily available. Alienation can occur in various contexts, including family dynamics, and while narcissistic traits may be present in some individuals who engage in alienating behaviors, it is not accurate to generalize this to all alienators. Narcissism is a complex personality trait and, in its pathological form, a personality disorder that requires a clinical diagnosis. It is not appropriate to label all alienators as narcissists without a thorough psychological assessment. Emotional Maturity of Individuals with Narcissistic Traits: * Regarding emotional maturity, individuals with narcissistic traits may indeed struggle with emotional regulation and empathy, which can sometimes be likened to the emotional capacity of a young child. This is not to say they are emotionally equivalent to a 3-year-old, but rather that their emotional responses can be immature and self-centered. Emotional growth in individuals with narcissistic traits can be hindered by their inability to see beyond their own needs and to consider the feelings of others. * It is possible for individuals with narcissistic traits to develop greater emotional maturity, but this typically requires a conscious effort to change, self-awareness, and often professional help. Therapy can assist in addressing the underlying issues that contribute to narcissistic behaviors, such as adverse childhood experiences or reinforcement of certain behaviors during development. By working through these issues, individuals can learn to form healthier relationships and improve their emotional regulation. Learn more for FREE at AllCEUs.com/DocSnipes-AI

I have seen this all played out for 14yrs New the kids for 14yrs not my kids but i decided to pitch in The mother was abused by her mom n then the stepfather was raping her since nine yrs My atachment to the daughter pains her She tje totally brain wash her Did not play out well so i did wat i can finished High School N then i left

I have not experienced this, but it just seems extremely hard to defend against for both the child and one being alianated. If a parent is intentionally or unintentionally is trying to manipulate the child, it just seems like they are very likely to succeed. And honestly I can't really see good solution to this. Being good parent probably helps, but if child is being manipulated it just doesn't seem to be actual solution. And proving this on court or something again seems pretty unlikely.

@DocSnipes

4 ай бұрын

Thank you for watching the video

I live at my parent's w my niece nephew brother and mom and my nephew and niece both tried to kill me. My brother talks a lot about how I need to die

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

I suggest you discuss with a trusted adult, school counselor, law enforcement, or teacher .... if you are a minor. If you are an adult, you can contact law enforcement.

how do I get them accept truth

@shelsea7245

2 жыл бұрын

I don't believe you can. I've tried to get my kids to see the light since they were in middle school. They are now age 40 and 42

I have request , could you do one that shows dynamic of this abuse when parents live together I have video's and voice recordings. and my youngest daughter put up with w0 much abuse from her dad and brother until she as a surviving mode in that environment allowed them to triangulate her. after we left that hell we were getting some parts of relationship badk but every weekend he would pick her up and bring her back hating me. she refused to go to school and pretty much was mentAlly leaving me again BUT I knew how to stop it and that was to cut off weekend's . it worked before with my other2 children and he had no rights to emily she was not his biological c.

how is this allowed to happen to the parents if patterns you mentioned are presented to the courts they shouldn't allow a allegation of any kind without asking questions that sort the attention to the prevention of parenting one side is confusing and mudding the way to harmony

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

@RASAAH777

2 жыл бұрын

It happens when the alienated parent does not take legal action against the alienator. Pretty they give up fighting for whatever reason.

For Me ✌🏼🕉️🙏🏻😶😓

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching.

I loved her till I found her sleeping with her boss I instantly hated her …does that mean I’m splitting or is this a perfectly rational reaction to a bad situation.

@DocSnipes

2 жыл бұрын

That is a very complex question. Splitting means seeing someone as all good or all bad. Rage about a behavior is different because you hate the choice the person made and the subsequent fallout, but do not see them as totally bad people.

My wife calls me “your Dad” instead of “your Daddy” and “your sister” instead of her actual name.

@DocSnipes

Жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

Of course it's abuse & neglect ! Total psychological & emotional violence !

So basically a narcissist mother cheats on her husband then kicks him out often on his ass with nothing, the only thing a man can do to keep the respect of his children is to explain to them why he had to leave …after years of what seems to be gaslighting coming from the mother the father has now lost everything so he lashes out at her for destroying the relationship and denigrating the sacrifices he made …. Maybe the mother being the primary care giver deserves the truth to be put forward to the children, maybe this attachment to a narcissist mother is the actual problem and this would add further insult to the injury suffers by the father ….. living with a narcissistic mother creates narcissistic children’s and the cycle continues.

There must be a reason for violence.

No choice for children.