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Nikkie Tutorials' Boyfriend Didn't Know She Was Trans
Are trans people morally obligated to tell their partners that they're trans? Let's discuss.
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I'm sure some people will take the title/thumb as negativity toward Nikkie, but I really like her! Just using her story as a springboard for a BIGGER conversation..
@JoeReaperX
4 жыл бұрын
Preach it!
@bennet2938
4 жыл бұрын
I love you and fuck yes for caring about people
@Kim-Unearthed
4 жыл бұрын
Love you, Blaire! You're amazing!
@nayanmonigogoi5492
4 жыл бұрын
Nice video I don't have any problem my Angel is Trans u r my Angel love u Blair I wanna marry u💞💞💞
@southamericunt6354
4 жыл бұрын
So he found out just now or what?? Sorry the video isnt over yet but I need to know lmao
The two people who NEED to know your trans status - Romantic partner - Physician (edit: for those saying "what about your parents and friends" well unless you've totally cut them off they are obviously going to know, but in terms of people you meet after transition these are the two people you should tell even if stealth)
@KreeZafi
4 жыл бұрын
Yes! I would argue that it could also be beneficial to tell close friends, just so they have a better understanding of your life story and experiences and can be understanding, but it's not necessary. I'd just personally be a bit sad if I had a close friend who I had known for years and they didn't feel comfortable sharing such a big part of themselves with me, you know? But, it's not morally wrong for them to keep it to themselves in that situation if they really don't wanna share.
@toxicc2962
4 жыл бұрын
And surgeons.
@Anthony-yu6ib
4 жыл бұрын
Gaming Kuckó surgeons are physicians
@vianjelos
4 жыл бұрын
Seriously people need to tell their doctors...you still have a prostate as a transwoman, still have a cervix as a transman those things are prone to cancer and need to be monitored...
@robdgarza
4 жыл бұрын
Anyone you wish to date it seems to me other than that you are not honest with them or yourself.
"Just like they don't need to tell them they used to be a baby." That... that is the worst false equivalency I've heard in... god, I don't know. It might just be the worst false equivalency I've ever heard period.
@leiasart4610
4 жыл бұрын
Was probably posted by a 13-14 y/o...
@SuperMisteryMan01
4 жыл бұрын
And these idiots on the internet will walk away feeling satisfied and content with themselves and their stupid thoughts cuz of how many likes they saw
@flyinghumanoid9068
4 жыл бұрын
It doesn't make sense because everyone used to be a baby so of course its just assumed. Comparing a unique experience to a universal one doesnt work.
@Anonymous-fj2uo
4 жыл бұрын
@@flyinghumanoid9068 Exactly, unless you were created as a teenager and came to earth from out of space at 20 years old.
@Kaerikillington
4 жыл бұрын
Difference is EVERYBODY was a baby once lmao
Not telling an intimate partner that you're trans is basically equivalent to "stealthing", or akin to not telling a partner about an STD. It's withholding information that could very likely have the other person revoke their consent. There's a word for that.
@CherryJuli
4 жыл бұрын
Gir's Taco 100% true.
@julie3865
4 жыл бұрын
I sort of get your point but it is not really a great comparison. STD’s can have horrible medical consequences beyond being mentally scared. Untreated clamydia in biological females can led to infertility and HIV will make it necessary take medication for the rest of your life. Stealthing also puts the female in risk of getting pregnant. I do a 100% agree that it is important to tell someone if you are trans.
@CherryJuli
4 жыл бұрын
Julie not only that. Some people if not most just don’t want to sleep without trans person.
@IggyTthunders
3 жыл бұрын
Whoah, whoah, whoah, that's ridiculous. By that definition, a husband or wife not doing some chore around the house and lying about it to avoid souring a sexy moment together would qualify as rape. That's not fair. That's also information that would turn someone off from consent; you need to be careful with your definitions.
@Woo_Woo_Woman
3 жыл бұрын
@@IggyTthunders The definition is perfectly apt. You're twisting it into something it isn't.
Everyone was a baby but not every woman was a boy.
@user-dh2kn1qc6y
3 жыл бұрын
Good point. She drew a false parallel! Lol!
@betty-boo9821
2 жыл бұрын
Men who identify as women are men
@Natalia-il8ck
2 жыл бұрын
every woman was a girl, otherwise it's not a woman
@cronchybo
2 жыл бұрын
actually, we all start of 'female' in the womb (that is, we all start out with phenotypically female gonads). a fetus only becomes male in the womb when the Y chromosome is introduced. biology is crazy
@aidasa3791
2 жыл бұрын
NO woman was a boy.
If my boyfriend confessed to me he was once a baby I’d probably leave him tbh.
@lunadexelaju3494
4 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂
@alexdestler3059
4 жыл бұрын
Oh shit it’s my second favorite person if RDR2
@lovelyjustine4ever100
4 жыл бұрын
i would laugh
@malain1715
4 жыл бұрын
If my girlfriend confessed to me she wasn't ever a baby I’d probably leave her.
@shibaunicorn
4 жыл бұрын
😂😂 truuu
Everyone was a baby but not everyone was trans
@annierose5098
4 жыл бұрын
Very true, I didn't even think ab it like that.
@annierose5098
4 жыл бұрын
@Nicole Cruz hwat
@vampirejelly8589
4 жыл бұрын
@Nicole Cruz ???
@shibaunicorn
4 жыл бұрын
@Nicole Cruz ?? lol that's cuz they were agreeing to that comment thanks captain obvious lol
@hwangmiyeon1001
4 жыл бұрын
Nicole Cruz Because shes using her Brain 🧠
As a trans woman, my trans status is the most important conversation I need to have with a partner. This needs to happen before things get serious. For my own protection. I always tell a guy who's interested in me within the first hour of knowing him. I prefer to do this over the phone or online, because it's safer for me.
@benjaminreyes3624
4 жыл бұрын
@Pieces109 I think your attraction over time would vanish. Your initial attraction is a straight one but the relationship to you would probably seem gay. You being with a male would settle in eventually as a reality. My thoughts
@michaellopez9846
4 жыл бұрын
@@benjaminreyes3624 yup for any man no matter how the trans is she not a natural born female ,each to their own though..
@roxana7975
4 жыл бұрын
Please be careful and take care, there are a lot of weirdos in this world.
@toniroche-simmons2238
4 жыл бұрын
I'm very open about being trans. Apart from looking like a guy still after years of transition lol. But I am open about it because I am proud to be a trans woman. And that's what it boils down to. If you are happy with who you are you won't hide your true self from others. Be proud of you. Xx
@account44485
4 жыл бұрын
unrelated to your comment but you're gorgeous!!
Idk why people say she’s problematic. She speaks facts about everything.
@cheesecheese6950
4 жыл бұрын
It's because people are too sensitive.
@linatheegyptian
4 жыл бұрын
IKR??? Fucking snowflakes
@mayanaseez1064
4 жыл бұрын
IKR finnnnnaaallllyyyyyyyyy somebody with a BRAIN
@idigress7866
4 жыл бұрын
Because, for many, facts are an interference. Lol
@MrAronymous
4 жыл бұрын
The way people talked about her she came across as some alt-right lunatic. But she's pretty chill?
genuinely proud of Nikkie for not using her transition as another cash bag but letting her talents shine through and making a name for herself. but not telling your S/O you used to have a completely different gender is definitely reckless.
@mirandasanchez823
4 жыл бұрын
zara badawy humble
@cherokeereynolds4488
4 жыл бұрын
She said she really regretted it though, I genuinely don't think she tried to be deceptive or reckless and she even told others to learn from her mistake.
@erikascencen
4 жыл бұрын
Lol yet fragile dandelion stephanie soo dragged her tazvids.to/g4tu6hn7bxqy
@zarabadawy4820
4 жыл бұрын
Deeply Deeply Offended. agreed
@zarabadawy4820
4 жыл бұрын
Cherokee Reynolds true. glad to see someone accepting their mistakes
Not informing one’s partner is essentially stealing their ability to consent.
@candyluna2929
4 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY!! Blaire should pin this comment
@xtonibx5770
4 жыл бұрын
I'm *not* saying I disagree at all, but can you elaborate? xx
@xtonibx5770
4 жыл бұрын
@Speaking Truth Oh, I understand it more now. The partner definitely has a right to know about these things for it to be fully consensual. Thank youu
@msrainbowbrite
4 жыл бұрын
its RAPE by deception
@JennBunny13
4 жыл бұрын
This is it! It’s hard to say that to people without them labeling you as transphobic.
We tell our partners about past relationships and divorces and abortions and pregnancies and all the skeletons the closet...why not being trans?
@megauser8512
3 жыл бұрын
I know right!
@AutomaticDuck300
3 жыл бұрын
I actually don't tell my partners about past relationships if I can help it. These are traumas I'd rather not revisit.
@FlwrCats76
3 жыл бұрын
Exactly! During the "getting to know you" process, typically you ask about past relationships and what you've learned from them (or why they didn't work) etc. This includes whether or not you've been married before, or....I don't know...that you used to be the opposite sex!!!
@lyndacork2821
3 жыл бұрын
.
@SpecialBlanket
2 жыл бұрын
I mean, I had an abortion but I don't think I've told some partners-- I don't even remember tbh because it's not their business and it was like fifteen years ago.
I’m gay and if I was hooking up with someone who said they were transgender without telling me I would be uncomfortable because I am not attracted to transgender people. And I don’t believe that is transphobic to say. Everyone has their types and I accept all people but I just don’t find transgender people attractive in that way. It’s important to disclose to someone.
@biggnome4653
4 жыл бұрын
Welcome Home yes thank you that’s like if I tried to trick a straight man into dating me it wouldn’t be right and they have their preferences that do not include myself
@rdgloveshouse
4 жыл бұрын
That makes no sense.. if you were hooking up with them wouldnt that mean that you are attracted to them ??
@VooodooOctopus
4 жыл бұрын
@@rdgloveshouse I guess you've never been about to hook up with someone and they said or did something that made you full stop and get tf out of that situation?
@josephxxllolzxdashton1392
3 жыл бұрын
Your transphobic. Why do you think transgender people look ugly . Based on their identity makes them ugly? A trans man is a man not a trans man, a man. A trans woman is not a trans woman they are woman .
@biggnome4653
3 жыл бұрын
@@josephxxllolzxdashton1392 when did I say they are ugly? I said I’m not attracted to them. And I’m not transphobic so don’t just throw that word around lightly. I love and accept all trans people and have trans friends. They agree with me and it’s not transphobic. So watch your mouth.
“The transwoman who looks nothing like a woman” Pulls up a picture of Jessica Yaniv lmfaooo.
@Alibern7
4 жыл бұрын
Rid97527 lol
@Alena8181snookie
4 жыл бұрын
Rid97527 and the ITS MA’AM character
@GamingArcane
4 жыл бұрын
@Skull Zone The Macho Maam looks too much like Dolph Lundgren. No amount of work is gonna maker her pass.
@femboyrules7594
4 жыл бұрын
@@GamingArcane him* lol
@lil_mexican8370
4 жыл бұрын
Rid97527 on the other hand we have nikita dragun
“Trans women don’t need to tell men they used to be a boy just like they don’t need to tell men they used to be a baby.” Well first of, everyone was once a baby. That’s common sense. You don’t need to tell them, since they should already know. But if you used to be a boy and you haven’t told your partner, then obviously your partner doesn’t know that you were a boy. It’s not common sense.
@joy5976
4 жыл бұрын
I don’t know much about like the surgery trans people do, but are trans women able to have children..? I feel like if you aren’t capable of having children that should be something your partner knows off the bat because having kids might b rly important to them
@ceces5283
4 жыл бұрын
I agree with you. I feel like I as a partner would want to know this piece of information, but it won’t make me love you less as a person.
@aliceinamazon6057
4 жыл бұрын
@@joy5976 Trans women cannot have babies because they do not have a uterus. Their penis is used to make a vagina basically by splitting it and making a cavity inside them which is lined by the outer skin of the penis. I hope this answers your question. 🤓
@purple1010
4 жыл бұрын
Alicein Amazon that just confused me even more
@newlifesummer1235
4 жыл бұрын
Sooo true.
People are literally INSANE to think you don’t have to tell tour partner your are a trans . And you are called transphobic???!! What world do we live in.
Ppl in these comment trying to put together false scientific fact to validate this is just cringy. First of all if you engage in an intimate relationship with someone without disclosing such a huge factor like this that plays a huge role in who you are then that straight up fraud. Don't victimize yourself and try and validate stupidity. Hiding such a thing is straight up immature
@angelicsailor1st
3 жыл бұрын
Amen👏👏 I understand some people dont think Sex is a big deal or intimate (one night stands hook ups etc) but it is it should be about trust so you don't put yourself in harm's way. You are exceedingly vulnerable in that position you've placed yourself in far too often we see headlines for all genders and sexual identities being harmed because of unsafe practices We all need to be more informed and safer.
@fromasgardwithlove2257
3 жыл бұрын
I have noticed a lot of members of the LGBTQ like to victimize themselves in the dating subject. Not all. But it's what I see frequently and its just cringeeee.
@ArcaniaSkypirateDen9516
3 жыл бұрын
@@angelicsailor1st aren't the people they are tricking in danger too? Just saying.🤷♂️ Trying to be the devil's advocate here.
@teamojesusss
Жыл бұрын
Agree. Very cringe
Yes! There was a trans girl here recently that was killed by a guy who, I guess, didnt know she was trans until after they had been physical. It's dangerous! You never know what other people will do, being upfront about it is just safer.
@Rubarb84
4 жыл бұрын
B V physical how?🤨
@MB-wk6uc
4 жыл бұрын
Rubarb84 sex, obviously
@brever12
4 жыл бұрын
@@Rubarb84 not sex but like... fooling around leading up to it. From what I understand he reached in her pants and found something he wasnt expecting
@feridedogan7653
4 жыл бұрын
Gwen aurajo was the Same Story.
@Rubarb84
4 жыл бұрын
B V 😬🤭
Btw the black screen glitch with the horns was supposed to have the text "STORYTIME" T____T KZread glitch idk
@MrShnier
4 жыл бұрын
It scared the fucking shit out of me lmao!
@tarynriver
4 жыл бұрын
Blaire White it happened as an ad came on for me I assumed it was part of the ad 😂😂
@dianeaishamonday9125
4 жыл бұрын
@@tarynriver me too!
@champagnepp1987
4 жыл бұрын
I was so confused hahaha
@Shlubbs
4 жыл бұрын
I thought I accidentally played another vid lol
You don't have to tell people you were a baby because everyone was once a baby, so it's obvious, that comparison is invalid.
Starting a relationship based on deceit is a recipe for disaster.
There's a difference between honesty and transparency. Honesty is telling the truth when asked, and transparency is telling the truth even when you're not asked. You're supposed to be totally and completely transparent with the ones you love.
@liablau
4 жыл бұрын
lil phil I agree!
@bocavmin
4 жыл бұрын
Karen Brock lmfao okay Karen
@Jolteon0163
4 жыл бұрын
Yes but what transparency does NOT mean is going out of your way to introduce your current partner to exes and ruining your current relationship with it. I suppose that’s more boundaries and dealbreakers(keeping in contact with your exes in this case) though
@fallendust3279
4 жыл бұрын
@Karen Brock i mean if you're a guy saying "I'm a girl" to your man and you really have a dick in your pants then like..
@RobbDepp
4 жыл бұрын
Amen
It's not just the big lie, it's all the little lies about menstruation, fertility, childhood experiences, medical issues, identity (license and birth certificates).... it's about character and morality... being able to lie every single day, about anything, no matter how small. You can't have an honest relationship based on lies.
@guinevereinthefield176
4 жыл бұрын
Reese2336 Spot on.
@exeaux3033
4 жыл бұрын
@dumb bitch just because they may not be lying to one person about the same thing everyday doesnt mean they dont lie everyday to others and themselves. Everyday they look in the mirror at themselves they lie.
@exeaux3033
4 жыл бұрын
@dumb bitch cool because you know you're wrong.
@letterborneVods
4 жыл бұрын
dumb bitch I think they didn’t meant literally everyday and literally every day talking about the period, they just meant very often there are little lies here and there. Not in everyday life, but since being transgender is a big part of one’s personal history, there’s just this huge chunk of time “missing” which need to be filled with artificiality. Also there might not be lies per se, but but a general silence/avoiding to talk about things.
@Val.Kyrie.
4 жыл бұрын
dumb bitch if you’ve ever dated anyone long term or lived with someone, all of these things come up. What if the other person wants to have children.
I have a 16 year old trans son... this was one of the first things we talked about it’s dangerous
@landontaylor4485
4 жыл бұрын
Welcome Home Thank you! It’s simple really... love for your child should be nothing less than unconditional.
@ZyairesReign
4 жыл бұрын
Wow you’re an amazing parent.
@ArcaniaSkypirateDen9516
3 жыл бұрын
@@landontaylor4485 Nah depends on what they did. If they m*rdered or r*pe someone they would lose all my love.
@Kaththee
3 жыл бұрын
@@ArcaniaSkypirateDen9516 I don't think it is wrong to love unconditionally. Remember when the unibomber's brother got a million for turning in his brother? I asked my father about it and he said, "I wouldn't turn in my brother for a million dollars but I would turn my brother in for being the unibomber. It is the same for a child. You can love someone and still do the next right thing.
@Kaththee
3 жыл бұрын
So your child was born female and is transitioning to male? It is more dangerous to trick men than women. It is wrong to mislead anyone of course.
Bro, I would tell someone about my self-harm scars before getting intimate. Anything that could be shocking or surprising needs to be addressed.
@fabreo4041
4 жыл бұрын
Absolutely!
@celestialudenberg71
4 жыл бұрын
Really u would?I wouldnt.......
@fabreo4041
4 жыл бұрын
@@celestialudenberg71 Well it is best to be truthful, and if you were going to be intimate with them, wouldnt that mean you trust them enough?
@celestialudenberg71
4 жыл бұрын
@@fabreo4041 to me personally, being intimate with someone doesn't mean I trust them,I only trust myself and no one else,but u said it's best to be truthful which is true I do agree on that, but I wouldn't lie to them if they ask, I'll just say "it's not important, so don't worry about it"
@fabreo4041
4 жыл бұрын
@@celestialudenberg71 that's agreeable
I’m not transphobic, however I believe it should be mentioned when dating. It’s deceitful not to say anything let the person decide if they’re ok with that.
@Brucehumphrey
4 жыл бұрын
You don’t have to worry about being called “transphobic” by thinking that way, because it certainly isn’t. Is the right thing to do!
@StacyannJ
4 жыл бұрын
Bruce Humphrey we live in such a sensitive world 🤦🏾♀️ when you speak your mind and state your opinions people think you’re attacking them 🤦🏾♀️
@Brucehumphrey
4 жыл бұрын
Stacyann J Exactly! People nowadays are total SJWs, and they get offended by every insignificant thing🙄
@peepeepoopoo2259
4 жыл бұрын
@Bruce Humphrey Legit. Fricking hate SJW’s man.
@Brucehumphrey
4 жыл бұрын
Denki Kaminari Agree
In an age, where consent is so talked about you'd think people would get that if someone doesn't have all the information they cannot give full consent.
@HeidiLynButterfly
4 жыл бұрын
Kristen K ~ 💯!!
@NicolePoliskey
4 жыл бұрын
Excellent point!!
@kaylzzzza
4 жыл бұрын
YES, THANK YOU
@kaylzzzza
4 жыл бұрын
Turquoise Cheetah i agree, i can see this as a form sexual assault. Especially if you are a girl thinking you are with a girl whos really a boy and can EASILY hold you down and shit..not saying that would happen, but realistically. Nowadays it is VERY easy to be a unpredictable sexual predator
@MrPr1nglz
4 жыл бұрын
@Turquoise Cheetah Your condoning murder and no matter the situation, that's never an acceptable solution. Its sad that's a thing to consider but your justifying extreme measures and that says a lot about who you are as a person. If you don't trust your partner enough to be 💯 with them then you shouldn't be engaged in a sexual relationship, period.
That’s like saying you don’t need to mention your HIV+ in your relationship like since when do people get to decide what the other person deserves to know 𝙎𝙈𝙁𝙃
@l9kl294
4 жыл бұрын
LIXMELLO Weird comparison but kinda right
@matxalenc8410
4 жыл бұрын
Have you been watching King of Reads? He said he didn't feel he needed to tell his partner about his HIV status. I almost shitted my pants!
@kiraalexandria1521
4 жыл бұрын
I don’t think it’s quite the same HIV can kill you and be passed to another person I agree not saying your trans can feel like someone has been lied to but it cannot kill you or be passed to you
@tsunadesenju9608
4 жыл бұрын
@@l9kl294 absolutely not a Weird comparison. The point is, there should be full disclosure before sexual contact, IFFF you're not stating it, it's because you know they'd likely revoked consent.
@l9kl294
4 жыл бұрын
Tsunade Senju I think it’s weird because having sex with a trans person doesn’t make you sick for the rest of your life. But i get what he‘s saying
No. You need to tell any romantic partner, or love interest, that you were born male or female and decided to transition into opposite sex. They HAVE the right to know and DESERVE to know. It doesn’t make you transphobic. That transphobic card is getting very old. And no. You don’t wait several months to tell them. You tell them right away, before you get to the date.
I’ve seen niki tutorials for years and never once thought she was trans
@kiara_7822
4 жыл бұрын
no one did
@ironlung7241
4 жыл бұрын
Oh come on! Her head is like a pitbull!
@fbiagentfrank
4 жыл бұрын
@@ironlung7241 I wouldn't say all that, but it had crossed my mind more than once that she may be transgender. I think a lot of people saying they never would've guessed are saying it to be nice because I don't believe I'm the only one.
@leiasart4610
4 жыл бұрын
@@ironlung7241 Oof. She's overweight, her head has nothing to do with being transgender.
@jetfox8631
4 жыл бұрын
How? I did the literal first time I saw her.
I feel like the only people who need to know ARE romantic partners. And they do need to know. It made me a little uncomfortable to know that she didn't disclose the information to her fiance.
@elizabethkelly8156
4 жыл бұрын
Doctors need to know as well so they are able to properly cater treatments towards common risk factors.
@AnotherCatLady-
4 жыл бұрын
@@elizabethkelly8156 Of course! But as far as announcing it to every day people, nah.
@macksies420
4 жыл бұрын
it did make me uncomfortable as well, but when she said that you should tell your partner, and learn from her mistakes, it made me feel better, because she was taking accountability by saying she shouldn't have done that, and doesn't condone this behavior.
@aradiasnowdon7016
4 жыл бұрын
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thinks this way! I can already hear the cries of "bigot TERF!" from the distance.
@Youtubeforcedmetochangemyname
4 жыл бұрын
I agree they dont need to tell everyone if they dont want too but partners yes and before it gets any kind of serious because thats what triggers violent responces from guys is getting attached to what they think is a woman and then bam they get hit with that in not saying violence in any way is ok but just starting what makes them do it
This really should be one of the first thing ppl should say. I’m pretty confident that MOST straight guys out there, like myself, wouldn’t wanna date a transgender female. Not trynna be offensive but I can assure you most straight males take this very seriously and will feel violated if they were told at a later time. Plus, it would really be a waste of time to not tell a guy this. You can do w.e you want or be whoever you wanna be as long as you respect other ppl.
@dess7301
3 жыл бұрын
@@dianaalexandravelasquezuri7923 what are you even talking about
@zenldh
3 жыл бұрын
Pardon my English, but not only that, I think it could also be harmful for the transwoman. Anger of someone that was being deceited/lied on could be scary and or fatal. Let's say the one who are being deceited is a straight male-or anyone stronger. She could be assaulted due to that 'burst of a moment of anger' - and even kil_d. Someone actually really said he'd end up kil_ng them if he was being deceited. And I don't blame these guys either. Because when anger controls, common sense gone. Especially when it comes about feeling.
@zagorith14
3 жыл бұрын
@@zenldh You're not wrong. Transpeople have been murdered for not informing their partner of their biological sex status. No one should be murdered for their life choices that don't affect anyone but themselves, so it's always tragic, but love, sex, and relationships are full of powerful emotions. Being deceived like that with someone you cared for can cause the exact opposite emotions to come out. And then tragedies occur and life is lost.
@devianadkar7969
2 жыл бұрын
@@zagorith14 they are not murdered for their life choices, they are murdered for what should be classed as rape/ sexual assault. If a woman killed her rapist everyone would be applauding her but when trannies get killed for lying or not disclosing it then they are the victims!
@teamojesusss
Жыл бұрын
@Chelsea Upton Exactly
I’m relatively new to the channel, I may have said something like this before, it was hard for me to accept the trans community because I just thought they’re weird, (which some of them are; “IT’S MA’AM!”) but Blaire has helped me to become more accepting and show that a lot of them are good people just trying to live their lives. I still probably wouldn’t wanna date a trans girl, certainly not marry one, because I wanna be able to have kids, that’s kind of a big deal. I don’t know why you wouldn’t tell your romantic partner you’re trans. I’m sorry but if we go in the bedroom and pull the pants down and there’s a dick instead of a vagina, that’s a deal breaker.
@silverstarlight9395
2 жыл бұрын
Would you marry a childfree woman?
@JohnW-yv6yp
2 жыл бұрын
@@silverstarlight9395 A woman that doesn’t have children, yes, a woman that doesn’t WANT to have children with me, no
@ah5721
2 жыл бұрын
@@silverstarlight9395 that about the infertile woman
@soveryeri2
Жыл бұрын
But there isn't a dick most of the time nowadays. After bottom surgery you'd be hard pressed to ever know the difference by looking or thru sex.
@ini9558
10 ай бұрын
disgusting cisgender snowflake got offended by us trans people 💅😂🏳️⚧️
"Why would you want to be with them if that's a deal breaker" that honestly sums up why honest communication about any topic is so important. If you set boundaries on what you feel is important and if the person you are dating doesn't have the same mindset why would you want to be with them long term? (Note: I know no ones gonna agree on everything that's why its important to have dealbreakers vs things that you can disagree about and still support each other on)
@Empress8828
4 жыл бұрын
You better speak the truth, I always tell my trans sisters "bitch if you think telling him you're trans is a deal breaker, why the fuck would you still want him"
@bobtee6466
4 жыл бұрын
I'm cockphobic.... I will NEVER change my mind!
@sofialara297
4 жыл бұрын
Love the username btw
@shadiebat2136
4 жыл бұрын
For sure. But I think that some things can be intimate and difficult to disclose, especially if it's related to trauma. I can imagine it might also change the way people look at you, especially if they barely know you, so I think it's understandable to want to get to know the other person and establish trust first. In a way, it might be easier to disclose that you wouldn't date a trans person/rape survivor/infertile women, instead of expecting them to disclose it on the first date, even if it might be a deal breaker for some. Relationships are built on honesty and trust, but not necessarily laying out your whole history on the first date. Sometimes people will freak out just because they were attracted to you, even if you tell them right away, and I can't really blame trans people for wanting to be safe. Often being stealth is being safe, and coming out is very vulnerable. Of course, if it doesn't come out long term, that's probably bad, and if you haven't had genital surgery it should hopefully come up before you get intimate, just like anything else that could be very unexpected in that ballpark(huehue).
@icannotpretend5834
4 жыл бұрын
Well said.
A girl I hit on stopped me mid flirt and was like I'm transgender.....I was like wait Really? She said yes and I was like damn girl you look Good an I'd never know she was transgender cause she's very passable I know some hate that term but let's be honest that's the goal when you're a trans person.
@shannond1511
3 жыл бұрын
Ok. Great story...
@sumairaahsan1
3 жыл бұрын
Shannon D lol
@tbonbrad
3 жыл бұрын
I love how you went right back to flirting.
@bxstar5276
3 жыл бұрын
It’s not always the goal
@landmerry_6742
3 жыл бұрын
@@bxstar5276 Mostly part of it though.
0:09 Blaire: *throws a fricken 1,000 dollar phone* Me: *clutches my iPhone 6 close*
@vilmahernandez215
4 жыл бұрын
Lmao glad I’m not the only one
As a lesbian that likes lady parts you absolutely should tell your partner if you’re trans or not. Its not going to be announced publicly, it stays between you two. It’s important that you’re aware of what both of you are getting into. I wouldn’t date a pre-transitioned women because I don’t like biological male parts. Edit: I absolutely love Blaire and I only edited because of typos;;
@femboyrules7594
4 жыл бұрын
And that is definely ok, never be ashamed.
@quinnp7566
4 жыл бұрын
SHOWER thoughts thanks, I won’t 💜💜 Have a nice day
@amberlynnweed1337
4 жыл бұрын
as a lesbian myself, I would never wanna be labeled as transphobic for having a genital preference
@Nwordsoup
4 жыл бұрын
More people need to see this comment. Men get hated on far too often for feeling the exact same way.
@celia-ov6rm
4 жыл бұрын
Completely agree. As a straight woman, I don't care about female 'private parts' (I have my own, and that's enough, ty)... so if you're dickless, you gotta tell me!
everyone saying "we knew" literally stop lol i have never ever see anyone say she was trans before, you didnt know, shut up
@69mickswagg
4 жыл бұрын
Everyone saying "we had no idea" literally stop lol I have never ever seen anyone say she wasnt trans before, you knew, shut up
@youmademyday4870
4 жыл бұрын
Literal, people are lying themselved lol literally nobody knew she was trans, not even thought on that. There wasn't a single comment saying or asking if she was trans
@youmademyday4870
4 жыл бұрын
@@blopp6240 HER face looked and still looking great, she's all female lol and y'all being delusional as hell. Nobody noticed and that's all.
@mathijskuipers4783
4 жыл бұрын
Its the same as people calling her him now. Only because shes been out the clossed
@eveliinapaaskyla3755
4 жыл бұрын
Yes. I had no idea, and i have never ever in my life met anyone who thought she might be trans, neither in real world or the internet.
I mean, I'd be pretty traumatized if I found out a guy I had something with was trans. And I'm actually quite open about that, but the not knowing and knowing afterwards part would feel like rape honestly, I didn't consent to sleeping with a biological woman and yet I was made to through trickery. If I knew beforehand I would make my decision and probably be fine with it, but not knowing and being tricked would feel horrible. Who knows, maybe it already happened and I'll never know!
@Anthony.and.Bigsis
Жыл бұрын
100% agree
@teamojesusss
Жыл бұрын
Agree. I'm a straight woman and I want normal men, not women disguised as men. I would physically hurt that woman for lying to me, if that ever happened. Not sorry. 🤷🏻♀️
@adri9795
Жыл бұрын
Can I ask why? Like, if you couldn’t tell unless they told you, what would be traumatizing to you? (I am also an advocate for being transparent about sex and gender before dating, I just don’t understand the traumatizing part)
@z.a.4801
Жыл бұрын
@@adri9795 Really hard to say, it's not a rational thing obviously, it's emotional, and all hypothetical. It would probably be like a straight man sleeping with a trans woman without knowing it, you feel like you were tricked into sleeping with a gender you are actually not attracted to. Or similar to sleeping with someone and then learning they are your sibling or a close cousin and they knew but you didn't. If you had known the full picture you would have made a different decision or made the decision accepting the circumstances. I hope this answers it for you, otherwise feel free to keep poking at me, this is not a rock solid opinion I'm aware.
@nachtrevi82
Жыл бұрын
I mean , how can you not notice it when all the make up and clothes and lights are off . It sounds preposterous really.
Deceiving anyone for sexual gain is super cringy and gives me rapey vibes like if you know they wouldn't consent if you disclosed whatever information it may be your withholding, then it isn't real consent. Consent is based on honesty and this is just predatory behavior.
When I first heard she was trans I thought she was gonna transition from female to male and then it clicked in my head that she’s male to female, I was so shocked
@startedwithareport5960
4 жыл бұрын
I'm FTM and I thought the same thing for a brief second. Yeah, she's definitely not FTM.
@michiru95
4 жыл бұрын
Me too!!
@ItalianValentine
4 жыл бұрын
StartedWithAReport same!
@aduneurodivergente
4 жыл бұрын
Same i was so shocked.
@tiffdoctor1890
4 жыл бұрын
Ash Bath same or a lesbian/ bi. I was shocked.
Not telling someone is literally stealing the ability to fully consent to a relationship. This is wrong. I could never forgive someone who lied to me in this way
@RodFleming-World
4 жыл бұрын
BS. The man gets the best sex in his life (unless he's been with a transwoman before). Why should she feel obliged to say anything?
@peanutboxes4076
4 жыл бұрын
Its rape. Imagine how a lesbian would feel if she realised she'd been duped into sleeping with a man. It should be illegal to hide this info before becoming intimate as you have taken away the other person consent.
@PajamaJazama
4 жыл бұрын
@@RodFleming-World If she shouldn't feel obliged to tell him then he shouldn't feel obliged to not beat the shit out of "her" either.
@RodFleming-World
4 жыл бұрын
@@PajamaJazama bullshit.
@WylieAlexWylie
4 жыл бұрын
Patrice Lovelace that is problematic because you are sayings trans woman is a man
Think about this: would you want to date someone who did drugs? Even though they were high functioning and they kept it secret (without you even suspecting because they’re high functioning) from you? I’m sure most wouldn’t and would feel lied to. This is the same thing. You’re supposed to tell the other person things about yourself like that.
@thotchocolate1345
4 жыл бұрын
i was dating a guy for 1,2 years and after 10 months of being together he told me hes trans.
@fabreo4041
4 жыл бұрын
😮 good example
@SB-ht8uo
3 жыл бұрын
Yo this is soooo good. Even as a recovering addict it is ALWAYS a conversation with a partner
@imcloud305
3 жыл бұрын
My girlfriend is ok with me smoking Marijuana....
I'm trans. I would never get involved with someone without their knowledge. Because without that crucial information- there is NO CONSENT!
Honestly I would have never guessed she was trans, omg.
@sheblywho
4 жыл бұрын
That's the point
@czar1161
4 жыл бұрын
Me too but hearing her voice when she came out there's a little bit something
@carol4547
4 жыл бұрын
just by her face, but looking her whole body, she's very masculine, i was very surprised when i saw a picture of her in a glow up episode.
@card969
4 жыл бұрын
you must be blind as a bat. You can see from a mile away she was a he.
@bigbawlzlebowski8886
4 жыл бұрын
She looks exactly like a trans woman what are you talkin about?
2 things you failed to mention: 1. Some people want kids out of a relationship, usually biological, which is something a trans person may not be able give their partner without medical wizardry. This is also compounded by your point on honesty in a relationship. 2. The analogy used in the post doesn't follow since all people used to be babies but not all people used to be the opposite gender. EDIT: Clarified point 1 due to the combo of homosexuality and lack of bottom surgery.
@swankelly
4 жыл бұрын
Yeah. You assume everyone used to be baby lol. It goes without saying.
@dasiajb
4 жыл бұрын
I read that and was like... girl BYE. We all literally used to be babies. Whoever wrote that is a cretin and a half.😒
@soliel5680
4 жыл бұрын
@@swankelly bold of you to assume that everyone used to be a baby, and still arent babies today.
@peepawfart
4 жыл бұрын
Ppl who let the possibility of biological kids become a deal breaker in a relationship upset me ngl. There's so many good kids out there who need homes! It makes 0 difference. 😔
@peepawfart
4 жыл бұрын
Like personally I'd love to have kids one day, but Id never wanna go through a pregnancy, abd plenty other girls nowadays feel the same. Why you not love me bc I don't want to pop a baby out for u 😭
People have a right to their sexual identity. even if it doesn’t make you “gay” to sleep with a trans girl it still can be something that changes how you grow your identity. It is so gross to disrespect people’s right to informed consent because you want to get some.
I love how we're now trying to justify lying to your partner or lying in a relationship... or simply lying about yourself.
In the UK you are LEGALLY obligated to tell them. You can be thrown in jail for this, as it IS a form of sexual assault akin to rape.
@aquamarinedream8304
4 жыл бұрын
Good law!
@BasedRanger
4 жыл бұрын
Good! It's similar in a lot of ways to "stealthing". It changes the likelihood of consent.
@sarahburke8938
4 жыл бұрын
I think that's fair. I can understand that coming out as trans to your partner can be difficult. It's not exactly a good conversation starter. But it's just best to get it over with. Hell, they'd probably respect that trans person more for it.
@aidenlin9878
4 жыл бұрын
that actually makes a ton of sense
@sheawineland1445
4 жыл бұрын
I mean it’s definitely immoral but likening it to rape is twisted
I would definitely be devastated that someone I love lied to me for so long about something so important. It has nothing to do with them but has everything to do with trust.
@mackaylacook148
4 жыл бұрын
Exactly
@iberlo85
4 жыл бұрын
Also, I'm a heterosexual female. If boyfriend came out as trans. I would not be happy to have been sleeping with a biologically female.
@tiffdoctor1890
4 жыл бұрын
Iris Berlo I agree.
@niamhemilydoyle8701
4 жыл бұрын
Iris Berlo that is transphobic because the person who you have been sleeping with is male, but the adjective describing them is trans, they are a trans male, you would be sleeping with a male. However if it was a relationship the issue would lie in the not being open about entering into a partnership with someone, but having sexual relations with a man who happens to be trans should not illicit such an aggressive and disturbing response from you, regardless of whether or not you were okay with it unless you directly questioned their gender identity you consented to sexual relations with a man who happened to be trans.
@deanwhaley1466
4 жыл бұрын
@@niamhemilydoyle8701 stop. They're not transphobic because they have a personal fucking preference. How about have some fucking nuance to your position. If the person generally is only attracted to biological female/Male and wants to create a family with them then that is their right to do so. Stop taking peoples right to choose who they love away from them by guilting them into fucking people they dont want to fuck. Its gross af. You fucking date a trans male guy if you want to.
The lying thing honestly seems like a power play. Like you got over on straight guys and proved how desirable of a woman you are.
Indeed!. Im a 46 year old straight white male. I am also Profoundly deaf. Often on Online singles group in Facebook, I make sure that the members know that I am deaf. I even make sure they know that I wear hearing aids and can speak well. It is IMPORTANT that people must know before we develop further .. from stranger to friendship. Trust was built upon the foundation of honesty and truth. Not lies and deception.
i’m a lesbian and if i was with a trans women and she didn’t tell me i’d feel lied to and violated, that’s a important part of their life and does change things in a relationship.
@jessicalee8483
4 жыл бұрын
john smith oh my god you’re hilarious did you know that you’re probably the funniest person to ever comment on KZread ?
@shannon9164
4 жыл бұрын
Same. If a trans woman was honest with me I’d still date them. But lying ? Nah.
@insasanity
4 жыл бұрын
john smith maybe try making a joke next time, then maybe someone would laugh
@insasanity
4 жыл бұрын
john smith it’s hard to understand that it wasn’t funny and it was disrespectful? Lesbians get made fun of all the time and people always talk about how they just need to have sex with a real men, I’m not even going to continue with this since you are just going to ignore what I said and answer me with a short and “funny” answer but what I do think it’s funny is that someone like you is on this kind of video making fun of lesbians lmao maybe one day you’ll realize
@zmayhem3959
4 жыл бұрын
@3L33T oh congrats! Now you're a better human being than anybody else
Im glad she admitted that she has regrets for not telling him sooner.
@MC-qc9iz
4 жыл бұрын
I don't understand why this is so big of a deal... She said that she did wrong and she explained why and that sounded reasonable, it makes sense that she was afraid. She also recommended to always tell your SO the truth and finally, they are OK with this. Again, I don't understand why everyone need to say over and over again that this is wrong c'mon we all know it's wrong
@Mindyobusiness89
4 жыл бұрын
@@MC-qc9iz cause some trans think it's okay NOT to tell a potential partner
@kevinmaceleven5806
4 жыл бұрын
Sheena D Or because their scared to come out to them?
@Mindyobusiness89
4 жыл бұрын
@@kevinmaceleven5806 tell them in before it gets serious or physical. The other person has a right to know
@neamhdhlisteanach6720
4 жыл бұрын
@@kevinmaceleven5806 yeah its still scary, but if youd have any common sense or decency youd realise it's both your own and the person you're telling's best interests.
I think having sex with someone under false pretenses like that is sexual assault
If you care about consent at all, then you can’t trick someone you’re in a romantic or sexual relationship with.
@derryair9419
4 жыл бұрын
Coercion and tricking someone into a sexual relationship is a crime I think because consent was given on false/forced terms
@IggyTthunders
3 жыл бұрын
Define "trick" if you're going to make absolute statements like that. A trick can be a very harmless thing or a very malicious thing, and you need to be conscious of that spectrum of behavior.
@jimmyhigh6897
3 жыл бұрын
@@IggyTthunders Leading a guy on to think youre a chick when in reality youre a male...that tends to be an issue with the vast majority of men
@hey_you356
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah I agree, it's kind of like tricking the other person.
@pistachioonut6683
3 жыл бұрын
@@IggyTthunders if the trick results in a person having sex when they otherwise would not have consented then its not harmless
As a bisexual I wouldn’t mind being with a transgender (doesn’t mean every bi has to) but I can understand if you are straight and it doesn’t match with you. There are people who don’t mind being in a relationship with a trans person and some who do and you have to respect that. Not telling them is just wrong
@elisejackson2854
4 жыл бұрын
i'm bisexual. i'd be fine with f to m trans but not m to f.
@Bro-tl1ev
4 жыл бұрын
Indecisive N.E.E.T Idk how it is for Elise Jackson but I think understand what they meant.... For me it’s not about of the genitals (bc again, I’m bi so idc) but it’s the type of personality m to f trans people have. They tend to be on the girly side which is fine for some people but I’m not necessarily attracted to girly girls. I’m more into people with “gender neutral” tendencies so for example girls with masculine aspects. But I will stay open minded maybe I’ll change my mind some day
@jessweaver5713
4 жыл бұрын
I agree with you, as long as people are honest I don’t care what bits and bobs they do/don’t have
@Ma5jay5dontxdoxthat
4 жыл бұрын
@@Bro-tl1ev you answer is the complete opposite of mine. I could do mtf but not ftm. I like girly girls. I have another realize but that is a lot hard to explain and has to do with my sexual practices with each gender.
@noircat5
4 жыл бұрын
I don't mind either but I would still like to know nonetheless because I personally feel like that's important basic information about your partner and if my trans partner didn't tell me they were trans until months or years after dating I would be disappointed they felt like they couldn't tell me.
It is so wrong not to tell your partner you are trans..... I'd usually not tell my friends (only close ones) but 1000% i'd tell my partners.
I feel like this applies to so many other relationships too. All I can think of is being upfront about wanting kids or not. Telling him you’re on the pill and skipping when he clearly stated he doesn’t want them. It’s unhealthy. I can understand why they react in a traumatized fashion…it wasn’t consensual. They consented to sex with a bio female, and any sex that is under fault pretenses isn’t consensual. I imagine they feel assaulted. I still find it abhorrent that they hurt the person, but I can understand the psychology behind it. Honesty with a partner about anything is so important. And like you said, why would you stay with someone that won’t except you the way you are.
Literally a month ago I talked to this guy and told him that I'm trans a couple of days into our conversation and he actually told me it is a problem for him and even though I saw this going a little further but I knew it was the right thing and things like this just makes me feel even better about me ending it as soon as possible. I hate people who doesn't tell their date they're trans. Miss me with that bullshit
@TheStraycat74
4 жыл бұрын
as a bisexual guy, my date being trans is not a deal breaker... Not being TOLD prior to intimacy that they are trans is a deal breaker. I have MASSIVE trust issues, and if 'they' cannot trust me enough to tell me, and give me a minute or three to shift gears in my head... then how in the HELL am I supposed to trust them?
@f-line5584
4 жыл бұрын
^this,it's not about them being trans more than them not trusting me
@reinal7896
4 жыл бұрын
FLEUR Thank you for setting the right example and please be safe out there ! Life can be very dangerous for all women, and trans women especially. People are more open now and I think with you being honest, there are plenty of men who will appreciate that and love to date you.
@fleurpetals_
4 жыл бұрын
@@f-line5584 I know but I talked about a related topic to that. Because it is connected.
@Yui_6472n
4 жыл бұрын
FLEUR AMEN!👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I'm straight and personally don't know if I could have a relationship with a transperson as I've never been in that situation. But, It would be so much more positive to know that they were willing to be really honest at the start. My current partner shared a very personal piece of information on the 2nd date and still to this day I am thankful that I was informed about it. It made me understand them better and I could discuss and ask questions in a candid way.
@wilsone100021
4 жыл бұрын
English Archer the herpes talk huh?
@edmundblackaddercoc8522
4 жыл бұрын
@@wilsone100021 lol
@aneshiadixon8762
4 жыл бұрын
You're a very decent person. Good on you for that.
@user-sf9gs2pg1b
4 жыл бұрын
I agree. I always tell my partners I am transgender. One of my friends had sex with a friend he didn’t know was trans. If it’s a one night stand I get it, but they’re apparently friends... It’s just kinda... a trust issue. Kinda like how with STDs, undetectable is not transmittable. Like being trans, they can’t detect it, but you want to know if your partner has had an STD for trust and psychological reasons, even if they cannot get it. Hard to explain, best analogy I thought of.
@NKC228
4 жыл бұрын
@UCWUyhuVBsct6yAr-Pu6xPjw no gay dudes will hit up a hettie for real
if you are trans and want people to respect that, you need to respect them enough to be truthful. Its not a one way street where you are entitled to respect and integrity but you dont give that to others.
What if u want to have a child? Oops surprise dont have those parts. Should've told me 5 years ago
@shayla106
3 жыл бұрын
@Darrelkun That’s not the point
@zgi7907
3 жыл бұрын
@Darrelkun if a cis person can't have children they should tell their partner too... People generally don't know they can't have kids but transgender ppl definitely know so what you're saying is not the same thing.
@megauser8512
3 жыл бұрын
ikr!
@ArcaniaSkypirateDen9516
3 жыл бұрын
@@zgi7907 ok.... What are you calling people "cis"?
@zgi7907
3 жыл бұрын
@@ArcaniaSkypirateDen9516 i don't always agree with blaire but this is common sense. idk why you're pressed
My thing is, if you’re going to be sharing your body with someone, you should let them know. Because now, you being trans is their business.
@Neo_Geisha
4 жыл бұрын
Agreed.
@tiffjak
4 жыл бұрын
Simple as that
@kora4185
4 жыл бұрын
I think the simplest thing would be to always know someone before sharing your bodies with them period
@OhHayFrands
4 жыл бұрын
I tell women I have HPV even though I have no physical symptoms - and I wear a rubber. But it's their right and prerogative to know what they're getting in to, and to refuse if they choose.
@a.b.2405
4 жыл бұрын
Huffle Kekos yes of course! (Honestly I think the hook up culture is toxic and ungodly)
I know someone who "tricked" men into being with her. she was literally beat to death by a hammer. That's why its important to tell people.
@Fawnziex
4 жыл бұрын
@hello uh, no
@cokaneds
4 жыл бұрын
@hello Are you a sadist or something? Murder and deception are not on equal grounds, one is obviously much worse than the other. I hate anyone who lies to their partner esp about being the gender opposite to what was assumed BUT murdering someone with a hammer is just insane and speaks more about how psychotic that person is than it does about the trans deceiving said person. You're fucked up if you think they deserved to die such a brutal agonising death.
@S1INS
4 жыл бұрын
@hello Deserved? Please tell me you're joking...
@tiffdoctor1890
4 жыл бұрын
Thora Friganza it’s important to tell because they were not born as a woman. Meaning they cannot give birth, have period etc. when they go to the hospital they STILL must identify as a males.
@Neo_Geisha
4 жыл бұрын
@@tiffdoctor1890 Yep.
for many people having a child is a big part of being in a relationship, it is sort of selfish not to be honest about your ability to have a child if you are a trans woman. and no adopting is not viable for many people. any relationship needs to be based on honesty anyway
Imo I would be dissapointed. if my partner did that to me. People are allowed to have sexual preferences. It's not about being phobic because phobia is fear and with fear comes hate and/or violence. You can kindly reject them and still be good friends.
I can kind of see why she didn’t tell him sooner. She transitioned really young, she never told anyone, and their relationship got serious really fast. But I think that would be really hard to find out someone you love is trans after the fact. I think it would make them feel lied to and maybe cause trust issues. Not to mention if they ever talked about having children. I hope it doesn’t hurt their relationship and I’m glad she used her own situation to spread the awareness to tell your partner if you are trans. Because she could have left the whole story of her relationship out completely.
@cherokeereynolds4488
4 жыл бұрын
I didn't even consider the children aspect of this. That must be kinda devastating for her fiance even if he's completely on board with everything else.
@aislinlindsay3950
4 жыл бұрын
Chinchilla hats it’s going to hurt worse if you leave it for so long, and I do feel bad for her fiancé because he may have wanted to have kids with her and have that experience with her, I hope they get through it because they clearly love eachother but this may be a dealbreaker
@chinchillahats4907
4 жыл бұрын
Cherokee Reynolds Yea. Maybe she told him from the start that she couldn’t have kids and just left out the reason why 😕
@aruallauraarual
4 жыл бұрын
Aislin Lindsay totally agree. Though I just found out that I might not be able to get pregnant myself. When in a relationship do u tell such a thing? I mean obviously before marriage! But idk I have just been thinking about it lately, when in dating is it too soon and when is not sharing this info lying? Just sharing my own dilemma haha
@kingmonde
4 жыл бұрын
She could've kept this secret to her grave if she wanted. Just saying... they could've been married til death do them part and he'd never have to know...
Blaire: I was friends with this person, we transitioned at the same time, we were roommates at one time... Me: Oh my god, they were roommates...
@CatWoman2000
4 жыл бұрын
same loool
I feel like it's non consensual if it's not disclosed
What if a couple want a baby? You can never hide that from your partner that would be so disgusting!
One person’s feelings should not outweigh the other person’s consent - if you lie to them, they are robbed of the question of INFORMED consent.
@lucygoose6237
4 жыл бұрын
Well said
@Sophie-rt2et
4 жыл бұрын
Tay Eats Cheese I agree
@claemayor1650
4 жыл бұрын
Its not technicly lying if they dont ask
@tayxbabe329
4 жыл бұрын
@@claemayor1650 Lie by omission is still a lie.
@claemayor1650
4 жыл бұрын
Doesnt really matter if nobody gets wise
I’d probably tell any girlfriend I have that I’m autistic (I’m diagnosed with Aspergers), especially when it has certain effects on my behaviour, and understanding and interpretation of certain situations, like being in crowded places and social situations. Does that mean that I could possibly be rejected? Yes, absolutely. But I’d rather do it so she’s fine with being with someone who’s autistic. And when it comes to dating someone who’s trans, I probably might. I wouldn’t have a problem with dating a trans woman, especially if she’s pretty feminine, but I would still see it as good form for her to tell me, especially when it would have effects on certain parts of our life together, and coming from a more Christian background, I see marriage as being rather important to say the least, and I’d want to be able to marry her and be with her for the rest of our lives. The idea that it’s OK to hide such important things from the person you love the most is pretty awful, imo, and it shouldn’t be encouraged at all.
@tiad.9536
4 жыл бұрын
I always told my partners about my autism and physical disabilities. Honesty is very important, and sometimes being autistic comes with odd behaviors, and is genetic to kids. Not everyone wants to deal with autistic children. I wouldn't want someone to be with me out of guilt or because I had to convince them to stay.
@JustBored589
4 жыл бұрын
I was in a long distance relationship with a girl who was diagnosed with aspergers. She had gotten a second opinion at some point while we were in the early stages of our relationship and waited until she was officially diagnosed before telling me. I care about her a lot, she is a great person. Very funny, smart, interesting. I love how she gives her honest opinion when I ask for it. There are a lot of things I love about her, but being long distance was very challenging. I feel like if she was neurotypical the long distance aspect would have been a lot easier but at the same time she wouldn’t be the same person/the person I loved. I’m glad she told me early on about her diagnosis, the diagnosis didn’t change how I felt about her at all
@mikkit876
4 жыл бұрын
i do the same with my ptsd.
@sendsnacks
4 жыл бұрын
I have aspergers and I usally tell me people as soon as I meet them. I also have SPD so I dont do touching. Idk if I would date a guy yet because I still let my problems get in the way.
@prisonmike8610
4 жыл бұрын
My boyfriend has aspergers and I wouldn't prefer him any other way. I don't consider aspergers to be autism though, just a social boundary.
I believe you should be honest upfront. If you choose to lie by omission then the relationship is doomed from the start.
Non trans woman here. I don't pretend to know what is like to be tans, BUT I know what a healthy relationship is. To me, this is like getting serious with a man and NOT telling him I have a child already. It's not fair to either of you to lie to them about something so important. Not fair to me to get involved with someone who wouldn't WANT a child, therfore setting me up for heartbreak. Likewise, for him, falling in love with one person and out of nowhere finding it they're someone else.
I hate those “he didn’t know I was transgender!” Videos so damn much. The titles and thumbnails give off strong “I’m so quirky” vibes, and it all seems so manipulative and deceptive (which it honestly is).
@MB-wk6uc
4 жыл бұрын
Magic Guy honestly they always come off as a bit rapey to me lmao
@angelloi1386
4 жыл бұрын
Magic Guy it’s ok you can say Nikita
@beatemueller7830
4 жыл бұрын
I feel it’s also arrogance. Like look at me, I transitioned so well people don’t know unless I tell them
@beatemueller7830
4 жыл бұрын
devontodetroit I agree. I’ve only met one person ever where it wasn’t obvious to me and she transitioned before puberty. And it’s not only trans people. You can tell if a cis woman had work done as well especially when it comes to boobs and lips
@TiTi-pm4my
4 жыл бұрын
@@MB-wk6uc I believe it is. They can't consent to what they don't know. It's so fucked up and for it to be trendy honestly makes me want to barf.
Imagine being a wait until marriage kind of person getting married and then hearing on wedding night "oops I'm actually trans hope that's not a problem."
@Zalerinae0491
4 жыл бұрын
Reminds me about the CSI episode where a couple was like that. Girl went so far as to leave open pads with blood on them in the trash to make her fiance think she was getting her period
@ughust
4 жыл бұрын
That reminds me of an awful commercial i saw a few years ago. I don't even know what it was about, probably condoms or something, but basically the guy and the girl just got home after their wedding night and she goes to use the bathroom, and he sees her standing to piss, and his face is horrified. She turns and smirks and then thats the end of the commercial. Yeah....
@lilpretzel5629
4 жыл бұрын
That's horrible 😨 It's sad to know that ppl even in intimate matters can lie to you ...this is why I have trust issues
@shrek7964
4 жыл бұрын
Spoogy Gus y does that sound lame a horror movie
@jwhippet8313
4 жыл бұрын
I think the bright side there is there's not a big "real love waits" movement among Trans folks.
Guess this trans girl is “transphobic” for wanting to be honest with my partner 🤷🏼♀️
Blair I love you so so so much. I watch these another trans people and my head spins at the ridiculous things they say and believe and ppl call me transphobic for disagreeing. The fact that you don’t ride with what everyone else believes and have you’re on mind and make sense of thing logically. Oh my God girl it’s so refreshing
One of my ex-boyfriends - who I dated for quite some time - randomly brought up to me that he was transgender and was in the process of researching how to transition. I'm gay and not attracted to women (trans or otherwise), so I told him that I couldn't stay with him after that. What followed was me being accused of transphobia and everything else you'd expect. Am I transphobic for wanting to date a man because of my sexuality and NOT a woman/trans woman? Edit: Thank you for the support! I've been mulling it over in my head for a couple years now and keeping it to myself, so its nice to get other people's opinions on the matter and get it off my chest. Much appreciated!
@tankgirl2444
4 жыл бұрын
RegularShowMemorabilia the hate you got makes me sad. It blows my mind that people are so "woke" now that they no longer accept different sexual orientations, like people expect everyone to be pansexual and that's it. Gays and lesbians fought so hard for acceptance and it seems like society is in danger of going backwards. Sexual preferences are valid and ok!
@laura.loverich
4 жыл бұрын
no
@GeoffrytheButler
4 жыл бұрын
A friend of mine had a similar experience when he was dating a female who was transitioning to male. He (then she) attacked said friend into staying with him and told him he was being transphobic, and all he could do was sit there and say "I like girls, and after this you will no longer consider yourself a girl. I'm transphobic, I'm just not attracted to guys"
@DermalextheElf
4 жыл бұрын
It’s ok to be straight 👍 I’m sorry people need to reaffirm that.
@OpossumOnTheMoon
4 жыл бұрын
RegularShowMemorabilia absolutely not. As you said, you’re gay. If they transition to a girl it wouldn’t make since for you to continue the relationship
Transgender people need to respect people's preferences. If someone doesn't want to have sex with you just leave them alone. Everyone has preferences and some people prefer cis people. Everyone's preferences matter and are valid. If someone doesn't want you then move on and go after someone who does want you. And just because someone may prefer cis people that doesn't mean that person is transphobic. Hiding you are trans from your romantic partner is predatory, selfish and sneaky. Why want someone who doesn't want you?
@MrStealUrGirl_96
4 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY
@MajorOctofuss
4 жыл бұрын
I think some trans people have covered themself (and the entire trans community) in a huge victim blanket, making them feel entitled to anyone they want, and if they get rejected they can pull the transphobia card. Bullying people into sleeping with you is fucking rape
@martasorangeberry
4 жыл бұрын
I mean it may sound dumb, but if the guy expects all the 'female parts' and is being flashed a d*** instead, isn't that like se**ual as**lt of some sort? Like they didn't consent to what is happening? Does that make any sense?
@kaliashot99
4 жыл бұрын
Deadassss. Personally for me it’s a deal breaker but child we could still be friends 🤪 just tell me straight up. If I’m lied too ima be pissed. I won’t kill anyone but sheet just know they might get socked
@Nicole-fb6fr
4 жыл бұрын
Well said!
Why don’t they just create a dating app for finding trans love? One that has a serious questioner when creating a profile like “are you openly out” “ publicly comfortable dating trans in public” like a way to weed out the people who are there for the wrong reasons, while trying to help trans people find genuine love and relationships.
@bellejour559
9 ай бұрын
Call it ‘CHASERS’.
I don’t have any negative feelings to the trans community I support your bravery! but I would feel raped if someone never told me
The ending " phobic " is being thrown around so much , it's crazy. You can't have any preferences anymore without being " phobic " about something.
@monikaa4716
4 жыл бұрын
Girl yes. I swear these things are just thrown around these days. “Oh no thanks I’m not into that.” “Oh really? Transphobic!”
@empresskarebear7519
4 жыл бұрын
I like to drop the literal 'copy and paste' definition of whatever 'phobic' people throw around. Too many people use it to validate their own feelings of importance by cherry picking words/ changing definitions to things that fit their opinions to make you look bad.
@paulinamungaray1662
4 жыл бұрын
Agreed.
@elliottvaughn700
4 жыл бұрын
I believe the overuse of phobic detracts from people that actually have a mental condition, over people that are just small minded assholes.
@Tsih
4 жыл бұрын
@@empresskarebear7519 Omg yes. Like, how about people with actual phobias? The word phobia used in these terms has always bothered me so much. Like, I doubt there's a lot of people who go in to a literal panic mode and possibly need medication to calm down when they see two men kissing or someone talking about trans rights. And if there is, they should seek help.
Lying to start a relationship isn’t smart or fair
@marianadesilva9174
4 жыл бұрын
True. Regardless of what the topic
@BlackkCobra
4 жыл бұрын
But isn’t it okay for trans women to WAIT to tell about their identity before they feel safe/secure w/ their boyfriend. I think many transwomen are afraid they will be in physical danger by telling the truth.
@somono5116
4 жыл бұрын
@@BlackkCobra Don't build a relationship on a lie in the first place. If the other party doesn't want to be with you because of it, keep it moving. It's much more dangerous to string someone along for ages and tell them LATER than to do so upfront when first meeting or going out imo.
@Mystik3Al
4 жыл бұрын
@@BlackkCobra waiting more than 5-minutes to tell someone that you're a biological male massively increases the chance of an angry response! Telling a straight man that your biologically male after any kind of intimacy has taken place is as unwise as it is unfair.
@deeparka3735
4 жыл бұрын
@@BlackkCobra Straight up FUCK NO. Lying is lying and waiting is lying. It shouldn't reach the point for when a trans and the "same sex" become lovers/together, that's just fucked up periodt. Trans people get a lot of hate but no matter what, they made the decision to become trans along with all of the other issues it brings. it should NEVER reach that stage. No physical sexual contact should be made unless the person has knowledge of their transition as that's just disrespectful, don't know about their religion, personal beliefs.. you just dont know. Trans men/women can be trans but at once stage of their life they were the opposite sex. Trans women especially are becoming ridiculously hard to pick out and tell the difference there's too much lying going on and that shit needs to stop. I'm a straight male and if i found out i was dating a trans i'd be furious. For a straight male, that is considered GAY no matter what they look like. You don't automatically grow ovaries now... come on now this is common sense. Don't tell lies and everything's nice
I hate that some people throw transphobic n homophobic around like that. That's a pretty serious accusation. N it's pretty evil for people to get mad at someone for having a preference. Having kids biologically is big for a lot of people n to call them "transphobic" for not wanting to be with someone they can't have biological children with.. Ugh🤬
If you’re going to get married and be in a long term relationship with someone, you should be able to tell them everything. I wouldn’t care if my girlfriend came out as trans, but if she waited until years later or when we were engaged, I’d feel so shitty like she didn’t trust me enough to tell me anything. Hiding ANY part of your life from a long-term partner is no good
I was just talking about how it was wrong she didn’t alert him before. The thing is, so many trans people get killed from lying about that kind of stuff.
@RodFleming-World
4 жыл бұрын
Yes and this is a serious issue. Especially when sexually insecure Western men are involved
@spawnymint
4 жыл бұрын
I guess since she fully transitioned at a young age, it may not have mattered as much when they started dating? (Besides being infertile) I agree though, it’s better to be upfront and honest instead of experiencing heartbreak (on both sides) in the end
@shesholdingcorn
4 жыл бұрын
Regardless of how far in her transition, it can be uncomfortable and even a deal breaker for some people.
@RodFleming-World
4 жыл бұрын
@@shesholdingcorn I'm not disputing that. I am saying that the reason for that discomfort can only be transphobia.
@shesholdingcorn
4 жыл бұрын
Or that they’re only comfortable with sleeping with natural women and as long as they support trans people it doesn’t matter who they don’t want to sleep with ^^
I like how even when Blaire is on the side of the person she is talking about she still makes the title controversial. We love it
@mirandasanchez823
4 жыл бұрын
Hollie Fletcher clickbait is not cute
@holls5121
4 жыл бұрын
Y T lol never said that was saying blaires personal way of approaching things is something we love because that’s Blaire :)
@RyubearSaysGao
4 жыл бұрын
I find it hypocritical. She takes a stand against deceptiveness, but the title is deceitful in a way. Blaire isn't without flaw, sadly.
@holls5121
4 жыл бұрын
南雲Haruya nobody is lol
@holls5121
4 жыл бұрын
Her Name okay?
The movie "boys don't cry" is about this violence and is based on a true story, it's an amazing and heartbreaking movie, def recommend
The little "hi, im trans.." got me like idk why
People don't disclose trans status, marital status, STD status or do disclose infidelity due to pure selfishness. Period.
@ellierc6710
4 жыл бұрын
That’s exactly what I’ve been saying all over this platform and I’m getting called a bigot. Sorry? What???????
@dtsotm
4 жыл бұрын
r vinlago yeah, not wanting to get murdered (which happens ALL the time) so selfish!!!!!
@vinlago
4 жыл бұрын
@@dtsotm that's a non-sequitur. Perhaps no one ever explained this to you but it's not all about you. Disclose trans status, & orientation up front -- prior to contact -- and then no one would be enraged or freaked out for being tricked or for participating in something against their convictions or orientation. Of course if they do hurt someone that'd be wrong but it is both childish and selfish to think you can impose your sexuality (which may be different than the person you lied to by omission) on anyone-- that's equivalent morally to forcing yourself on someone. Same goes for not disclosing std's (safety concerns) or marital status (safety and morality concerns). People who disclose infidelity though put the burden of their immoral behavior onto their partner. Unless you've risked their health by being too selfish to practice safe contact or there could be a kid running around with your DNA, or unless you plan to continue cheating, keep your infidelity to yourself. Especially if your original relationship is over. Otherwise you're disclosing it to hurt your partner and unburden yourself from your horrible behavior.
@coachcosta69
4 жыл бұрын
I don’t expose Infidelity out of intellectual mercy.
@dtsotm
4 жыл бұрын
r vinlago i’m not trans so your misdirected rant is pretty redundant. and what sexuality is being imposed?? trans women are women, it’s not their fault that some men are so insecure in their own sexuality that they resort to murder. you do realise that there are people who literally seek out trans women just so they can murder them, kind of like what happens to gay men in russia? you say ‘if’ as if trans women being murdered on a first date is hypothetical. it’s not. it’s an epidemic.
Thinking that telling your partner you’re trans is on the same level of necessity as telling them you were once a baby is an incredibly idiotic statement. All people were once babies, not all people are trans; those things are in entirely different ballparks and thus not at all comparable. If you truly love your partner, you don’t keep secrets from them. Not telling them you’re trans is keeping your transsexuality a secret from them. Transitioning is an extremely important and huge part of a trans person’s life and your partner has the right to know important things about your life like that and you should not take that right from them. If they think you being trans is a dealbreaker, then you leave them behind and move on to someone who loves you unconditionally. PSA before people interpret this the wrong way; I’m refering to what was said in the Instagram comment shown in the beginning, not to anything Blaire said.
@wolfetteplays8894
4 жыл бұрын
David Pavlas some people wanna go deep stealth, and it’s the only way to help their dysphoria. I’m sorry you wanna force all trans people to be visible
@pavladavlas
4 жыл бұрын
Wolfette Plays I’m sorry you took my comment out of context like that. I obviously wasn’t talking about those people, as those people are not who the video is about.
@sippycupdoll
4 жыл бұрын
Thank you. I’m not a transgender but I’m one of those people who can’t be with a transgender. Everyone should do what they want but I know that I could never love them the way that they deserve. Another point is that I don’t fully agree with transition (it’s their choice but this is my opinion) and if my boyfriend would tell me he’s trans I couldn’t be together with him romantically. I can’t describe or reason why I just can’t. So thanks
@knightwing5169
4 жыл бұрын
DAVID PAVLAS IS SUCH A TRABSPHOBE HE IS A BIOGT TOO! Yes, this comment was a joke.
@MargaritaKatrenko
4 жыл бұрын
You don't need to "love" someone to tell them this. I think this should be said to anyone you even plan to date. That's like I'm (name) (last name) and i am transgender.
In the mid nineties my husband and I were living in Hawaii- he was in the army. Anyway one of his soldiers went to downtown Honolulu and picked up a prostitute. He didn’t realize she was a trans woman( and claimed she didn’t tell him) after they hooked up he realized and flipped out! He murdered her! He went to prison for it- as he should have!! But maybe if she had told him up front it wouldn’t have ended with murder! It’s awful that she was murdered - I’m not condoning his actions at all - he deserved prison! But it’s tragic the this young woman’s life was taken!!
If I was transgender. I would feel so uncomfortable with cis straight male even looking at me without knowing let alone trying to date me. LET IT ALL OUT people. I mean that.
When Nickie said that her parnter was shocked and “dealing with it” I was like uh oh. I hope their relationship doesn’t take a sour turn from this. Good for her that she was honest, but she should have been honest at the very beginning of their relationship
@lannisterfilth
4 жыл бұрын
Right? I hope she told him before they decided to fuck cause that's really messed up.
@kezzz1137
4 жыл бұрын
I am going to assume a man made vagina looks quite different than a biological vagina? Have they not had sex?
@iliveinaconstantstateoffea9634
4 жыл бұрын
@Moon Rise hmm. Kind of like what a vagina is. You should check surgery videos. Those look like realistic vaginas. Then again, I doubt you'd recognize one even when presented.
@iliveinaconstantstateoffea9634
4 жыл бұрын
@@kezzz1137 it actually looks very realistic and natural. Mtf surgeries are very effective at feminization and are extremely realistic.
@lunadexelaju3494
4 жыл бұрын
@@iliveinaconstantstateoffea9634 surgery does not make a vagina, it makes a flesh hole where balls n a penis used to be. Vaginas and the reproductive organs of a woman are God made, (it's a sacred thing being a woman and having the responsibilities that come with that from the DAY we are born FROM a woman's body.) Surgery smurgery, so tired of ppl plastering implants in their breasts and paying for a man-made hole and thinking that's all it takes to be a woman, boobs and a vagina hole...NOPE, not even close!!
Consent is informed. If they aren't informed - it's not consent.
About that comment at the beginning of the video: Your partner already knows you were once a baby, but they don't know you were once a different gender.
If there’s “nothing wrong” with it then why hide it
@Nebulousss
4 жыл бұрын
why? because unfortunately people judge people for stuff like this. I totally get why she didn't want to be open about it before. Society is still immature for these topics
@miguelcondadoolivar5149
4 жыл бұрын
@@Nebulousss The kind of people that do that are not the kind of people you want close to you... If being honest pushes them away, it's for the best.
@Nebulousss
4 жыл бұрын
@@miguelcondadoolivar5149 But are you considering that telling someone you still don't fully trust could lead to things like being bullied or hurt in some way? You still gotta make sure you're not gonna get hurt by telling someone, I do agree with the decision Nikkie made.
@myraclesname
4 жыл бұрын
There's people out there straight up killing them.
@JOhnJohnson-xg6sq
4 жыл бұрын
Nikki didn’t make her channel about being trans, so it didn’t need to be mentioned.
Before being physical you need to tell them Idc how you feel, period
@GW-gz8jh
4 жыл бұрын
a little bit of everything who said they didn’t?
@andrewjoseph5539
4 жыл бұрын
Jane Doe The burden of proof falls on the person who made the claim, not the person who disputed the claim. Edit: typo
@andrewjoseph5539
4 жыл бұрын
Jane Doe In other words, you can only prove a positive claim, you cannot prove a negative claim.
@GW-gz8jh
4 жыл бұрын
Andrew Joseph Actually no one knows in the specific instance of Nikkie so neither can accurately be said whether they did or did not. But, if A Little Bit of Everything paid attention, Blair stated the video isn’t specifically about Nikkie but about the greater topic in general if you need to disclose it to your partner. The original comment that was responded to by A Little Bit of Everything wasn’t directed about the Nikkie situation exclusively but they responded to it if it was anyways.
@andrewjoseph5539
4 жыл бұрын
Jane Doe I don’t remember saying that anything pertained specifically to Nikkie.