5:19 The irony of America. Wont ban guns after school shootings. Will ban phallic looking flower on TV,..

@arcturionblade1077

2 жыл бұрын

Thots and pears are more useful than thoughts and prayers.

@maazkalim

2 жыл бұрын

Boy.. Have you ever met pressure-groups?

@Omni0404

2 жыл бұрын

@@maazkalim Yeah, like those pesky dentists! Always telling us to brush our teeth and floss. What sheeple.

@SuperDirk1965

2 жыл бұрын

what a sad, sad country.

@TheDanishGuyReviews

2 жыл бұрын

The gun is good. The penis is evil.

New York just removed it's last payphone. In Australia, Telstra recently made all the 'pay phones' free so that people in trouble or down on their luck could still make calls.

@sknkwrksowner

2 жыл бұрын

we charge for everything. lol Keep in mind you can buy the airspace over buildings.

@politesociety

2 жыл бұрын

@@sknkwrksowner I hope one day America gets over it's national fear of socialism.

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

Polite Society, the problem is that most Americans don't know what socialism is. It's just a buzzword the right uses to scare the masses

@lisab9541

2 жыл бұрын

That's great. I worry about that access here.

@whocareswhatmynameis993

2 жыл бұрын

That is profoundly noble. 🤝👏

Without any payphones.....kids will read old Superman comics and wonder why there used to be random changing stations on city street corners. 🤣🤣

We have that plant in Borneo, Indonesia. I played with it when I was a kid, its a plant eating ants, a very amazing plant. Never, never I ever thought that plant look like a pnis before. We have a big statue of it in the city. Now I can't look at that statue without thinking it looks like pnis. Thanks I guess

@cc1k435

2 жыл бұрын

You might not have noticed somehow, but I think we all figured it out right away. 🤣

@maazkalim

2 жыл бұрын

Ahh... A carnivore plant, of course it is!

@reiskywalker17

2 жыл бұрын

@@maazkalim you can open the tip (god now that gross 🤣) and peek inside if it has dead ants floating on liquid. We sometimes pour the liquid to our head believe its good for the hair. Cant confirm if thats true tho, but I still have my hair

@reiskywalker17

2 жыл бұрын

@@cc1k435 we called it kantong monyet (pocket monkey) cuz you can open the tip (😬) like a pocket. Now I cant unthink this. I want my innocence back

@maazkalim

2 жыл бұрын

Ahh... When you say “tip”, you meant like the penile meatus in human-body, riiigghht? 😬😈😏 Also.. Is that said “liquid”, like a lube? Say.. [A ]gel[atinous]?

Showing a plant on TV: no we cant allow it. Selling assault rifles to an 18yo: SURE. murica

@OneRandomLeo

2 жыл бұрын

You need to understand... There is no money in penis plants.

I love how you could see the tips of 2 other plants 🤣

The aversion to human nudity to the point that an image of a plant has to be blurred is completely absurd.

@Velatos1

2 жыл бұрын

funny thing, they weren't blurred in the following pictures :D

@NiennaFan1

2 жыл бұрын

Specifically it's an aversion to sex that is so extreme that it does more harm than good

@janfairclough6982

2 жыл бұрын

Welcome to Amuricrrrr

@zemoxian

2 жыл бұрын

Well we were settled by puritans. Haven’t completely gotten rid of that puritanical streak.

@ingridfong-daley5899

2 жыл бұрын

@@zemoxian We haven't even tried--we're doubling down on that batsh*t puritanical nonsense now. Just a bunch of heathens, wandering around in our nsfw bodies he created in his perfect nsfw image, just so we could fulfill the self-loathing prophecies while still blowharding to the greater heathens--the non-Muricans.

Only in the USA would you have to blur a plant on TV. Mass shootings? Show everything. Phallic plant? Nooooooo!!!!

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

That's us in a bit shell

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

nut shell. Damned spell check

@deltav864

2 жыл бұрын

Except they don't... for obvious reasons. But maybe they should, because the images of someone death gurgling on the pavement will stick with you and perhaps that will resensitize people to these acts of violence and turn the "thoughts & prayers" into action.

@margo3367

2 жыл бұрын

That plant does look like a penis.

That kid saw High School Musical 2 and was like "hold my apple juice" 😂

That little cutie at the beginning had it going ON. Kids are so self-confident and rubbery.

- "Do we need to blur the whole thing?" • "Just the tip."

@bjoardar

2 жыл бұрын

Like with breasts: -"Do we need to blur the whole thing?" • "Just the nip."

@traceythompson1092

2 жыл бұрын

Archer fan, perhaps 🤔?

@MoniBahaa

2 жыл бұрын

@@traceythompson1092 you betcha.

That wee boy had made my day 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

A want a book that is nothing but a collection of Stephen's descriptions of his Meanwhile skits. :) Make it a big one. A coffee table book. :)

I lived in New Zealand for 15 years. Never ever ever should have left... or at least, I should have moved back the instant I realised I had made a horrible mistake.

@trevorz459

2 жыл бұрын

Welcome to the United States of Atrocities 👋😀

@alexissey4023

2 жыл бұрын

If it’s not personal, why did you leave?

@trevorz459

2 жыл бұрын

@@alexissey4023 Lord of the Rings was infringing 😆

@TheAccidentalViking

2 жыл бұрын

@@alexissey4023 Where did I say it was not personal? And I'm apparently autistic and didn't understand you were asking a question. I left New Zealand because one of my sisters rang and told me my mother was dying of cancer and it was MY DUTY, because I had no children, to leave my everything and go back to the US to help my mother. So I did. And then, she told me I had to find somewhere to live or pay rent because I wasn't allowed to live with her rent free. So,... family sucks. Cancer sucks. Let me move back to New Zealand.

@alexissey4023

2 жыл бұрын

@@TheAccidentalViking I was just trying to be polite.

The MEANWHILE monologue juxtapositions of descriptive prose are nothing short of brilliant. Kudos to the writers!

Gotta say, I am genuinely impressed with the elaborate intros to “meanwhile” that Stephen’s writers come up with again and again… How DO they do it??

@killer1963daddy

2 жыл бұрын

Weed, lots of weed.

@Kuro_Tsuki

2 жыл бұрын

@@killer1963daddy probably 🤭😂😶‍🌫️

@The_momur

2 жыл бұрын

I can’t wait for him to carve a couple tikis. He’s already built a guitar.

@jmisc

2 жыл бұрын

Probably some sort of random word generators, subjects, verbs, etc.

@Nomednomel45

2 жыл бұрын

I’m just honestly annoyed with them. They were funny a few times and now they’re literally just a waste of everyone’s time

Steven I don't know who writes the opening part before you start meanwhile but it gets more complicated and more hilarious every time LOL my hats off to you

Embracing "Meanwhile" has been a mind-bending experience for Stephen, wonderful!

@Velatos1

2 жыл бұрын

i miss the Wørd! No need for extremely BS long intro, that takes sometimes more than half of the entire clip...

@brandonbuckles826

2 жыл бұрын

@@Velatos1 speak for yourself. I love the intros

@Velatos1

2 жыл бұрын

@@brandonbuckles826 speak for yourself, i hate them

Ah..Stephen, thanks for giving us laughter & hope- keep it coming!

I've learned more abt artisanal craftsmanship from Meanwhile than anything lol

Yoga ….because the fear of death in a classroom isn’t cultism….it’s a real thing….but let’s worry about yoga!

@birbluv9595

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly.

As a lighting manufacturer I approve this message! Just finished wiring a venetian chandelier the other day

Goat Sacrifice Ken….omg! That writer is just gold.

That monologue walk-in was fucking incredible. Best one yet. Well done Stephen & team.

@Crimethoughtfull

2 жыл бұрын

They're all getting INSANE! They need to put out a book of 'em!

@brandonbuckles826

2 жыл бұрын

@@Crimethoughtfull yes!

The "long walk" just keeps getting more and more entertaining!

"Everybody's gotta go to New Zealand." No truer statement has ever been made, Stephen.

Okay; that Meanwhile intro was the best one ever! Kudos to the writers and to Stephen for his smooth delivery!

EU: showing full frontal nudity and sex scenes on daytime television. US: blurring a picture of a plant on a late night show.

@neilscales

2 жыл бұрын

Yesterday, I was watching an old French exercise TV show, and the closing credits were shown over the naked presenters taking a shower!

@kingmantheman

2 жыл бұрын

Yup... the EU has more freedom and less guns

Man, he fights a lot of racoons and hobos in his Meanwhile monologue

This boy just gave my heart/soul something to smile about today 💕😇🙏

Fun fact: the nepenthes family of carnivorous plants is actually what the Weepingbell pokemon was based upon. Not kidding.

@crookshanker

2 жыл бұрын

I'll never look at that Pokemon the same ...

@MrGksarathy

2 жыл бұрын

*Weepinbell.

@berb-182

2 жыл бұрын

Yup definitely looks like a Victreebell Lmaoo

@ea7109

2 жыл бұрын

🤭🤭🤭

I remember christians in the 80's going crazy over yoga, FFS move on already. Bloody fear of the unknown, they don't even know what yoga is. I also remember them calling troll dolls evil in the 80's so not much has changed. You'd think over time people would become more enlightened as we gain more knowledge but some haven't grown much at all.

@calmyourmind5665

2 жыл бұрын

Don't forget how "evil" Dungeons and Dragons was. Like you were basically worshipping Satan if you played.

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

They are taught not to think. "An idle mind is the devil's playground" is just a way to scare people away from their own thoughts because that might lead to questioning things

@KristiContemplates

2 жыл бұрын

Cabbage Patch Kids were going to murder you in your sleep.

@KristiContemplates

2 жыл бұрын

@@calmyourmind5665 Have you seen the movie "Dark Dungeons", and the companion 'making of' "Attacking the Darkness"? The movie is an adaptation of a graphic novella of the same name about the evils of D&D, written in the 1980s. Wonderfully insightful. Highly recommended 👍

@forgenorman3025

2 жыл бұрын

@@KristiContemplates Dark Dungeons is not a documentary, it's a stupid movie and mistake that Tom Hanks made in starring in it.. D&D is about getting together and creating stories with friends and having fun. And if that "novella" you're referring to is that stupid Chick Tract you're out of touch. I play tabletop games like D&D, have since I was a teen. Trust me, no goat sacrifices or bloodletting rituals happen. Stop being so close-minded and easily fooled.

Unsurprising about Dolphins tasting each other's urine to recognize each other - dogs smell each other's butt.

@maazkalim

2 жыл бұрын

#Funfact? Or just ‘true’..?

@AccidentalNinja

2 жыл бұрын

Well, they have echolocation, & I've heard that they have series of clicks that they can use to identify themselves & even "describe" things to each other... why are they using urine?

@Kuro_Tsuki

2 жыл бұрын

@@AccidentalNinja because it's more personal.

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

Having lived with dogs all my life, I don't think they need to sniff each other to recognize each other. I think they are just checking to see if the other dog had something better for dinner

@bentoth9555

2 жыл бұрын

@@AccidentalNinja because between the urine thing and the raping thing dolphins are just trash animals.

Who ever writes those lead ups to meanwhile deserves an Emmy NOW!

That kid is in the wrong sport someone put him in a dance class ASAP lol

Whoever writes those intros needs a raise. Regardless of how much they're paid!

1/ this intro got a standing O from me, alone in my living room 2/ Some writer missed the chance of calling back the penis plant for Goat Sacrificing Ken..."If plants can have a penis, then so can I"

The part Stephen left out of his story was that he locked Jacinda's phone, because, like a child, he played with her password screen too many times while she was driving.

That kid loosened up his body for the hit.

@maazkalim

2 жыл бұрын

Ouch.

6:31 Remember when "Christian influencers" looked less like Barbie and more like the original Rev. Green in Clue?

Having a PhD in Chemistry I approve this introduction.

I do hope that Ben keeps that at-bat dancing tradition alive when he finally plays in the majors.

@chassan10

2 жыл бұрын

For a moment or two, it looked like he was doing John Cleese's silly walk

@emjay2045

2 жыл бұрын

He’ll get hit with a pitch if he does

@marydungan6748

2 жыл бұрын

Sorry, but I thinks it's not cute. A bit at first sure, but how much time did he waste of the game showboating? Already signs of a narcissistic. Either that, or I'm being a cranky old lady.

@magna116

2 жыл бұрын

Right. Because it was soooo classy.

@MonkeyJedi99

2 жыл бұрын

@@chassan10 The Ministry lives on!

I so appreciate the intro to Meanwhile, I'm ecstatic by the chemistry detail. Looooove it, and to top it of a botanical reference. Unmatched

Pretty ironic that the lady complaining about the Yoga Barbie looks like she's more plastic than an actual Barbie

@fr2ncm9

2 жыл бұрын

I bet she doesn't even believe that crap. It's all about getting publicity.

@DanBrown96

2 жыл бұрын

@@fr2ncm9 I grew up ultra conservative and we were fed that kind of nonsense. I dunno if she's for real but some people definitely are, sadly.

@keithwright8626

2 жыл бұрын

@Senna_Grillo12 Funny, I feel the same way about Christianity. I mean all the rape and murder and genocide in the Old Testament, the Crusades, the Inquisition, that is some pretty dark stuff sure enough

@DagobertX2

2 жыл бұрын

@Senna_Grillo12 Was there also a story about cutting a baby in half like in the old testament?

@Taijifufu

2 жыл бұрын

@Senna_Grillo12 most people just see yoga as elaborate stretches and exercise. Consult your physician if you fear for your life from starting a new exercise routine.

That kid went full major Payne 🤣

It's so weird that people think yoga is evil. I'm guessing these people have never practiced yoga. They need to ~observe their breath~ and chill out.

@MonkeyJedi99

2 жыл бұрын

Oddly enough, one can yoga without Hinduism. Just like one can oppress women and minorities without practicing an Abrahamic religion!

@beth8775

2 жыл бұрын

Calming your mind and being in tune with your body is basically the exact opposite of their fundamentalist rules.

@Bill_Garthright

2 жыл бұрын

They're religious nuts. What else can we expect?

@rebecca8525

2 жыл бұрын

@@beth8775 Not really; they see it as a form of prayer that doesn’t involve the Judeo-Christian God, and so they fear that it is satanic. But it’s really just a relaxation technique that has nothing to do with praying to any deity at all.

Glad to hear the _Meanwhile_ overly descriptive intros get love.

This probably explains why I can't tell dolphins apart.

You gotta admit, Stephen Colbert can make a story.

As an entertainer, I could not imagine doing what you just did. I need to actually BREATHE once in a while.

@anamazing2297

2 жыл бұрын

Sounds like Breathe With Me Barbie would be perfect, then! 😂

@yvonnetomenga5726

2 жыл бұрын

@Cozmo the Magician • I wondered whether Stephen took breathing lessons to be able to say all that. Glad a professional recognized the difficulty.

@KristiContemplates

2 жыл бұрын

I did not know this type of delivery is supposed to be hard. Might explain the side-eye by medical officers when I say I'm having an asthma attack, in full, albeit short, sentences. I'm in a small town and didn't study dramatic arts beyond high-school 🤷🏿‍♀️

As a glass artist I am thourghly impressed with the research behind this meanwhile! Here here Colbert and staff!!!!

Love the meanwhile intros so much!

I imagine the endangered plant of the phallic persuasion would actually be NSFWWF.

Maybe get Ken a specially imported houseplant for his birthday?

The " knock it out the park "Boogie Baby😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

6:47 lolol. I know an old Mainer who, when asked to do yoga, you always say "Yogurt, I had yogurt for breakfast"

The yoga woman looks pretty much like a Barbie herself!!

“I always wanted to go to Cambodia. You can get a lobster dinner there, for like, a dollar.”

@beth8775

2 жыл бұрын

But will you see aliens?

@jayluck8047

2 жыл бұрын

@@beth8775 - Probably, when I’m tripping balls after eating a $1 lobster dinner! 🤪

@rinzaghi2057

2 жыл бұрын

look at the flashy thingy

@marieroberts5458

2 жыл бұрын

@@rinzaghi2057 take her to dinner. Spend more than a dollar.

Meanwhile is incredible. I love it! 😂

Blurring a plant, yet no gun control. Wow, America. How modern of you.

@emjay2045

2 жыл бұрын

How American of you

@apassionforlace

2 жыл бұрын

@@emjay2045 I'm safely tucked away in Europe, dear

@marshamariner7897

2 жыл бұрын

And w the TX incident Tuesday 😵😵🤢🤮. They Alwaz find a reason...also remember when Cheetoe TRAITOR was in....he allowed mentally troubled people to get guns....they r ALWAZ saying ' it's 🚫 guns....it's the people....OK. PUT THE TWO TOGETHER AND FIX THE FUCKING PROBLEM!!!😵😵😠😠🤢🤮🤢🤮😿

@cathywethington5913

2 жыл бұрын

We aren't scared of being gunned down in the street. We're afraid of sex

@apassionforlace

2 жыл бұрын

@@cathywethington5913 why?! Usually that's good fun. With over 26000 gun deaths a year in your country, money still rules. 😢

The Derek Jeter joke made me laugh out loud.

@AJ42K

2 жыл бұрын

Same here and I'm a Chipper Jones fan. Go Braves. We are still those Muddafukkas.

His "meanwhile" opening monologue should be too much, but I come to watch meanwhile for it

Louis sends out a positive vibe over the screen! Hopefully he and Jon will share it equally!

Oh, wow. I just realized that Lewis's first guitar is a Univox Custom. How very cool. My first bass as a teen was a Univox Precisely. Great to see him showing some love to such an old guitar.

MEANWHILE Has Become EPIC !!! Long Live LSSC

I have a new favorite plant now. Thanks, Stephen!

@AJ42K

2 жыл бұрын

Get your penis fantasies outtake here. GOD DAMMIT CARL.

Girthy AND veiny. What a plant!

This was THE BEST “ Meanwhile” intro ever!

I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, trying their darndest, to hammer out another erstwhile Meanwhile

@nicolesong6199

2 жыл бұрын

😥😥

Ok ok! Enough of this sex talk ! Geeze I'm in a dry spell ya know! Lol But at 70, it's nice to be reminded of what things look like 👍

New Zealand is my favorite place on the planet! Love Jacinda, the people there, the landscape… everything. Love it!!

I can vouch that at least one jar contained salmonella. We actually got a call from Costco saying, “We see that you bought some Jif peanut butter. You might want to bring that back for a refund. Or die, it’s up to you.“ OK, maybe not that last part.

And yet the peen plant/flower being held by the woman wasn't blurred? : /

@nekolalia3389

2 жыл бұрын

🤫 🤐

@redletterl78

2 жыл бұрын

Context is everything 😄

Everyone deserves to visit NZ once in their life. But please, bearing climate change in mind, only once. And try to limit the rest of your flying too. Best wishes ❤️

Stephen said "everybody go down, you're never going to regret it" 😆

I'm torn today... I don't know what's sadder... the T ball kid peaking at 5, by current social standards, or our childish society's need to blip and blur such absurdities...

His writers got their groove back!

@comkver

2 жыл бұрын

When did they lose it?

@kingjamos2422

2 жыл бұрын

@@comkver 5 minutes before the show. They lost it in the couch cushions, but luckily the hobo from the meanwhile intro found it in time.

Minor correction, the plant is actually Nepenthes bokorensis, not Nepenthes mirabilis. The latter is by far the most common and widespread member of the genus, whereas the former is endemic mostly to a single mountain region threatened by tourism and land development.

@drsingingeagle

2 жыл бұрын

- I thought it was a "pitcher plant."

@Omni0404

2 жыл бұрын

The jackals can't be contained

@misatsundere399

2 жыл бұрын

Are you a jackal that got lost?

@dbone3356

2 жыл бұрын

Wrong channel, jackal.

@kimberlydlapp3441

2 жыл бұрын

So you're saying it's a member?

OMG what a brilliant, BRILLIANT opening

Only Stephen is awesome enough to adlib a Caddyshack character's name on national TV, love it lol

I'm first which means I'm now over educated and too advanced for the Republican nomination..

@outlawbillionairez9780

2 жыл бұрын

I'm in the first grade. So I'm the same as a republickin politician. Uh oh, MTG just pooped herself again. Teacher will be mad.

@ev06863

2 жыл бұрын

Requirements for Republican Candidate's: 1. IQ below 65 2. Hardcore conspiracy belief 3. Ignore the horrors that your people must endure.

@outlawbillionairez9780

2 жыл бұрын

@@ev06863 hey! Stop talking crap about governor DeathSentence!!

@ivareskesner2019

2 жыл бұрын

That makes absolutely no sense...I see what you were trying to do but...no sense 🤷🏻‍♂️

3:43 sometimes in life you have to walk to your own beat 💓

When you begin the entrance of the Meanwhile segment, I make a full pot of coffee, toast a poptart & by then, the segment begins!

The phallic plant is carnivorous 🤣

I've wanted to go to New Zealand since I was 13. Over 30 years.

@LindaC616

2 жыл бұрын

About the same for me, though I'm a tad older. One of my favorite books as a young person takes place there, so I wanted to go

Best meanwhile intro since... Well, the last one.

Absolutely the best intro to Meanwhile ever.

Yes. Yes the jungle IS glad to see you.

Ironically the only person who demands goat sacrifices in the Bible is God, not Satan. Except sometimes it's your children instead of a goat.

@nedim_guitar

2 жыл бұрын

Oh, that's a good point!

@arthurneddysmith

2 жыл бұрын

@@nedim_guitar -It's an obvious point ... to anyone who has actually, you know, read the bible. And just wait until you find out about slavery in the bible.

@HayleysComet3

2 жыл бұрын

@@arthurneddysmith One of the gifts God liked to give.

@Chriscraft-ug3sz

2 жыл бұрын

@@arthurneddysmith God also explicitly states not to mistreat said slaves though

@y_fam_goeglyd

2 жыл бұрын

Count the dead directly caused by Satan (btw, the serpent in Eden is _not_ Satan. It's just a talking, four-legged snake), then count those killed by, or in God's name. Especially women, children and unborn babies. God isn't pro-choice, he's pro-unwilling abortion.

Lmbo I love that they had to blur out a plant 😂

6:20 I like how that didn't have to be blurred but the first one did

Ahahaha The baseball kid 🤣🤣🤣👌

I think a certain Christian influencer needs to loosen up a bit. Maybe she needs the yoga doll, or a Cambodian plant or two. 😏

@Silverfirefly1

2 жыл бұрын

She's giving Barbie a lot of metaphysical credit.

@c.b.barlow

2 жыл бұрын

😅😅😅

@MonkeyJedi99

2 жыл бұрын

Or a weekend without the seven layers of "beauty" products.

@KristiContemplates

2 жыл бұрын

The plant reference was uncalled for. Ick 🤢

@KristiContemplates

2 жыл бұрын

@@Silverfirefly1 well, Barbie did start life as a hooker. who knows what else she's into 🤔

One day the meanwhile intro is going to be longer than the actual segment lmao

Leave the plant “uncut”! LoL

Omg 😆 that kid dancing was so freaking cute.

We are drowning under the influencer movement. These low self esteem, talentless individuals should get a real job.

I was with you all the way through that twisting and turning glass based intro…

Finally glass. I knew it was coming. So perfect.

Stephen is the Best 😊❤