What do you think the role of marriage should be in today's society?

@singwings

Жыл бұрын

For both parties: Sex that isn’t requiring the concerns for disease exposure where polygamy and adultery are illegal in marriage…is a big one. For children having roots and no question of who the genetic father is and carrying the family last name as a unit, even if the last name is “Smith-Jones” …for the mother and father like they do in many Spanish speaking countries… this is important in showing the value of men as well as the women for a child. Furthermore, women outlive men in age and pay less into social security wages while in maternity leave and if she makes less money than the partner, the marital rights after a husband dies are also valid in addition to the shared “breadwinning” for the heterosexual male-female childbearing couples.

@warui1162

Жыл бұрын

the institution of marriage has been destroyed. in current times marriage is little more than an act of submission to a woman.

@blackjew6827

Жыл бұрын

non. Let women be free and men to be in peace.

@KD400_

Жыл бұрын

Dating has destroyed western society. In general marriage was always arranged. The woman's father chose her husband. And in most parts of the world people still do this

@zoesoteria5327

Жыл бұрын

What it has always been... Companionship, procreation and partnership

"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages."

@XOPOIIIO

Жыл бұрын

The lack of incentive.

@iche9373

Жыл бұрын

The Power of Friendzone

@jaughnekow

Жыл бұрын

The lack of meaning

@AR-lz2br

Жыл бұрын

Many women just focus and care about wearing an engagement/wedding ring to "fit in", rather than caring for their relationship.

@tashisherpa7263

Жыл бұрын

The lack of respect

this man just said that marriage is closer to being the end of a journey than the beginning of one, and that just blew my mind. I recently got married, and i just realized how much we waited on in order to feel like we were finally prepared to be married. Where previous generations like my parents would just get married first and then figure the rest out later. WILD

@5Demona5

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, the guy would literally start his career journey already needing to support a wife. While now both parts make sure they can support themselves before committing.

@noobboon2579

Жыл бұрын

​@@5Demona5 and the result is declining birth rates. Way to go to preserve heritage.

@meg_2087

Жыл бұрын

@@noobboon2579 maybe its not so bad considering all the over population

@raaspider

Жыл бұрын

The idea was they would build together

@MangaGamified

Жыл бұрын

Standards skyrocketed cause of the internet seeing they can always find someone more established.

Marriage seems like a dream to me. To be able to afford living with a partner and having someone to love and trust enough seems impossible today.

@MyouKyuubi

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, it's more about trust and respect, to me... I wont feel safe enough to live with someone for the rest of my life, unless the idea of putting my life in their hands doesn't bother me.

@shamanthjilla

Жыл бұрын

Americans posting their Ls online

@fbyi2940

11 ай бұрын

@@shamanthjilla 💀💀 Americans getting karma for their history and war crimes

@ReasonAboveEverything

11 ай бұрын

@@fbyi2940 Karma? For history. Karma for something you didn't do? How does that work?

@user-wo1gb9tu7d

9 ай бұрын

@@ReasonAboveEverythingask your dad

From what i've seen, money becomes an issue that wrecks a lot of marriages and relationships so it makes sense to me that people are waiting until they're more established and that people who are higher educated stay married.

@buckaroobonzai2909

Жыл бұрын

Women are waiting to find an established man. Smart men hide their money.

@emmanuelnaranjo8114

Жыл бұрын

I though marriage was about love

@buckaroobonzai2909

Жыл бұрын

@@emmanuelnaranjo8114 Marriage, as far as I can tell, is about love, friendship, and business. You can manage temporarily with 2/3, but if you mess up two or more, you are toast as a man. MArriage has always... always and still does have a strong business side to it. Friendship part of it is what keeps older couples happy still... the whole holding hands at the park thing, and knowing facts about each other... and that sort of Homer And MArge Simpson sort of stuff....

@AlexSchwartzATV

Жыл бұрын

@@emmanuelnaranjo8114 unfortunately people still need to be able to afford to live, if money is getting in the way of simply living it can be difficult to maintain a healthy relationship.

@aek12

Жыл бұрын

@@emmanuelnaranjo8114 love can be bought by money and highly paid degree.

In the past it was, men worked and woman raised the kids. Now financially they both must work while also raising the children. This has made things extra stressful and caused a lot of divorce. With the divorce rate so high, getting married looks increasingly undesirable. If we continue to have households that require both parents working, the marriage rate and also the birth rate will continue to decline. Equality could have meant both parents working 20 hours each, and deviding the household responsibilities. But instead, the capitalist society requires 40 hours from each parent, and realistically women still have to do most of the child care. Having the choice to work is a great thing for women, but having no free time makes it a bad choice.

@thecat5819

Жыл бұрын

yup the double shift phenomenon!

@mohdtaslimarif972

Жыл бұрын

​@@Dimitris_Half but women had easily enough time to look after children

@yareyaredaze9656

Жыл бұрын

@@Dimitris_Half well pointed

@mohdtaslimarif972

Жыл бұрын

@@Dimitris_Half but you can't do that in a modern job

@Terrapin47-s8y

Жыл бұрын

You don’t make arguments with anecdotes. You don’t know enough people to prove anything.

I am a 34 year old woman who is unmarried, has never wanted it, and do not understand what the big deal about is. A person’s relationship status is the most trivial thing about them in my opinion. And why is it considered a “life goal” to incorporate a legally binding contract into a private relationship where half of your earnings are subject to distribution in the event of dissolution anyway? The way I see it, everyone has the opportunity to establish themselves financially. Therefore, we all need to work to have our own. Then, if you find someone that you like well enough to do life with, just stick together until the relationship tuns its course (that is - IF it runs its course). But why do you need a contract to do that?

@roses6564

4 ай бұрын

You would think this would be so natural and self-explanatory but the marital institution brainwashing is the most powerful dogma that has ever been invented in human history. It;s surreal how people parrot self-oppressive insanities that make no sense in realty.

Marriage is basically an expensive luxury for most people now, wages are insanely low, working hours are insanely long. Yet people are expected to have time, energy and money to cope with marriage ontop of all the work place exploitation... things are only going to get worse for the average person

@JM.5387

2 ай бұрын

Wait until you hear about what life was like before the New Deal, when there wasn't even a minimum wage and most families had to bring their children to work in factories to make ends meet. People now have more privilege and prosperity than they did through most of human history.

I was married in my 30s. Never again, not for me. I do not want to live my life 24/7 around someone else. I found it unbearable and certainly ruins all pretentions of romance. I am a lone wolf. If anyone I meet asks me "why are you not married?" I reply: "I guess I just got lucky".

@thedisintegrador

4 ай бұрын

Certainly no resentment in your worldview ;)

Marriage at this point is out of the picture for me; not even dating seems desirable. With economic uncertainty, job insecurity, and political instability, it’s increasingly difficult to bear the burden of constantly pleasing another partner while you yourself are barely getting by and you’re just surviving at this point.

@jacqueslee2592

Жыл бұрын

Well said. Due to economic pressure, many people were never raised under a good parent model, so it is difficult to even desire marriage or family when family life was a traumatic experience for many as I experienced it. I am in my 30s already and this kind of life I will never know but I am resign because I am focused on myself and making money for myself and my pets.

@orkunsanal

Жыл бұрын

They say equality but also the ones demand for the economic power from the men

@Lala-un5yb

Жыл бұрын

Yep

@quendelf

Жыл бұрын

Being in a relationship isn’t about pleasing someone else. It’s about two people supporting each other.

@lydiaheelu2681

Жыл бұрын

Same here. At this point I don’t even know how I can share myself with another human being when I feel like there’s hardly enough of me for me.

"Marriage is not a guarantee of love"

@iche9373

Жыл бұрын

„Never Gonna give you up“

@imsohandsome

Жыл бұрын

@Pooja Sahoo and don't have kids. People don't grow up so how can they even raise kids?

@iche9373

Жыл бұрын

Marriage means endless love, and it just works.

@buckaroobonzai2909

Жыл бұрын

Yeah... people lie about marriage vows all the time.

@chrisscullynz

Жыл бұрын

Its a gaurantee of misery

I honestly feel super lucky to not want kids, and know there are women who feel the same. It totally changes the dynamic for why two people want to stay together, and allows two people to actually get to know each other.

@bikebudha01

Жыл бұрын

non-breeder high five!!!

@ll2323

11 ай бұрын

Same. No point to have kids or marry. I pick a career first.

@bikebudha01

11 ай бұрын

@@ll2323 Don't knock marriage. I'm on 27 years. Best thing to ever happen to me. Not saying it's for everyone. But if you do find that someone special, it's magic.

@davidterrell1242

11 ай бұрын

​@@bikebudha01you're right. Marriage isn't for everyone, that's why some of us knock it.😂

@bikebudha01

11 ай бұрын

@@davidterrell1242 knocking marriage is like knocking chocolate cake...

People have so many unresolved traumas, nowadays that getting into a relationship can be detrimental to one’s wellbeing.

@orangeninja912

Жыл бұрын

Trauma is not a new phenomenon

@pax3974

Жыл бұрын

​@@orangeninja912 You're right, in fact you could even argue that the reasons or causes for trauma may have decreased as general prosperity has increased. People are now manufacturing their own trauma, but that's another topic. Having said that, what /has/ changed is that we as a society are failing to treat trauma. Instead of "hard truths" we opted for "soft lies", and the society leans on affirming individuals, the worse it will get.

@the1stmetalhead

Жыл бұрын

​@@orangeninja912 you're right it's not something new. But see how past trauma from wars caused fathers to either suicide or not participate in child's life. Which caused generational trauma of fatherlessness among men and women. That's why it's necessary to avoid or cut off any trauma that you can before being married and having children. Women and men need to be educated and take care of themselves so as to be trauma free. It can come from various different things like past relationships, sexual encounters, etc.

@mariacruz07

Жыл бұрын

exactly

@shumayelkhan8154

Жыл бұрын

This is the key resolve your own trauma and find someone that has done the same or somehow matches your trauma.. has a good career, your schedules match. Etc.

“…rather than the beginning of a journey, it’s as much the end of a journey…” felt it

@swim5alive710

Жыл бұрын

It’s just getting to the end of that journey AND finding someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with is the hard part nowadays 😭

@SuperChaoticus

Жыл бұрын

He makes it sound like a video game.

@geminiblue6677

Жыл бұрын

Actually it really does feel like that. Instead of playing a game with all our friends from lvl 1. We are instead grinding solo till max lvl in order to join the raid. It takes the fun out of the entire experience..

@glowiever

Жыл бұрын

@@geminiblue6677 way to explain it brother, I feel ya

@daoud1256

11 ай бұрын

​@@geminiblue6677I like the video game reference. I start to realize that the journey or the grind through all those levels is what life was. Just holding somebody's hand at the credits feels like you missed out on the plot.

I think we often forget that marriage (like any relationship/friendship) is difficult. It needs to be continually worked on and nourished. It requires sacrifice, loyalty and codependence. These days we are lead to believe if we aren't happy we should just get out of there. This is relevant to our jobs, our marriages, our families, our cities... the list goes on. There is no sense of responsibility any more. We need to learn it's not about happiness, but our role to make our societies and communities better places to live. It's why we admire Fred Hollows restoring site in 3rd world countries or other people giving up their lives to help others. The concerning part is it's not just marriage that is dying. It's friendships, it's our cultural framework and it's our ideologies. The rapid decline in civilisation over the last 5 - 10 years is truly scary. I don't believe we need to adapt to our times (because they are leading us to chaos), we need to examine history vs. today and understand what's going wrong. And finally re-examine what the goal is for our lives.

@jlacy73

Жыл бұрын

Well said!

@artorhen

Жыл бұрын

if you want citizens to actually work and contribute to society and not for their own gain, then abolish capitalism

@ngocdoan1883

Жыл бұрын

this is the best comment I’ve seen on the internet! Recently, I was unhappy with my job and your comment woke me up and gave me light! thank you!

@tomault3063

Жыл бұрын

Corporations crushed men's souls in the post-war period. The government stopped propping up this unholy system in the 60's as everyone left out of the male-dominated suburban utopia protested to force their hand. Things are messy, but still preferable to the Stepford Wife scenario the Church promotes.

@hellodude8794

Жыл бұрын

This is a classic game theory/nash equilibrium. If two players are both responsible and willing to co-depend on another, then the total amount of profit together is the highest. However, for a specific player, not being responsible or leaving the marriage gives you the highest individual profit no matter if the other player is being responsible or not. Therefore, both players find leaving the marriage to be the best option, even though it is not the most profitable option

The problem is many people think marriage is like a belt you can take off if it's uncomfortable. In reality, marriage is like a hand-cuff with no key that you have to keep on no matter how uncomfortable it is. When a couple divorce the chain may be broken, but the cuff is still on the wrist forever.

@roses6564

4 ай бұрын

If the chain is broken, the cuff is fine. After all, kids are probably involved, so it's not like you can erase the past. As long as people can re-build their lives. Divorce is necessary as an accountability mechanism at the societal level.

What's missing from this is the fact that a man used to be able to take care of a family of four - mortgage, groceries, car, etc. - on ONE salary, and THAT is the reason marriage as an institution has shifted, not because of feminism or any other reason. It's much more difficult to find stability when you're just scraping by.

@38WorksGr8

Жыл бұрын

Part of the reason a man cannot earn that wage is that the introduction of working women has almost doubled the labor pool. More workers = more competition for jobs = less pay per worker. Thats not the only reason, but it is a significant one. People's expectations of what being "middle class" means have skyrocketed as well. Higher expectations requires more income.

@CaptinLongdong1

Жыл бұрын

@@38WorksGr8 This person gets it. Women entering the workforce while great for equality, definitely had downsides and culture shifts.

@hanatemonstas4485

Жыл бұрын

@@38WorksGr8Seems like a simple problem. Why don’t more men just be SAHH? No one is forcing them to compete with other people, males or females. Its not like you need your genitals to do a job, unless you are in a specific line of work.

@38WorksGr8

Жыл бұрын

@@hanatemonstas4485 This is where our biology and culture clash. Working wives seem to divorce SAHH at a very high rate compared to working husbands who support SAHW. I guess women and men arent drawn to the exact same things in each other

@squidandchips

Жыл бұрын

If you think that's bad, AI and robotics is going to have a doozy of an effect on the jobs market.

Growing up seeing my parents quarrel so many times, had hardened my resolve on not getting married. EDIT : Didn't expect so many likes/agree. On the bright side, I feel I am not alone.

@Debby142

Жыл бұрын

You are right,I feel the same way coming from a broken family, childhood trauma and a failed relationship.i just feel like I need time to heal and find myself..

@abellyold4859

Жыл бұрын

@@Debby142 A lot of give and take is required for any relationship to work. Anyone who does not understand the aforementioned should not be in a relationship, especially one such as a marriage. I am not traumatized the way you are. I saw in my parents that marriage is not as easy as I thought. They still love each other, but they are obviously incompatible. Compatibility is key but finding Mr/ Mrs Compatible is hard if not impossible. As in all things , luck plays a crucial role. Sorry for being long-winded.

@mmmmmmmmmmm10

Жыл бұрын

​@@Debby142 go to India and become a Buddhist. Then come back to reality.

@hubbawah

Жыл бұрын

Same here, I grew a dislike for love, romance, marriage, family and all that because of my parents.

@madsquirrelz276

Жыл бұрын

same, my parents got together, married at an age way younger than I am and I'm still single. They have asked me if I'm ever going to meet someone and settle down. and i do truly want someone but growing up in a tumultuous household where pretty much the only interaction i ever saw my parents have with each other was being at each others throats , never gave me the impression that marriage and children was something I particularly wanted. It seemed like a trap that just makes people miserable from which it is very hard to get out of and the results devastating for all those involved, espeically for any children that arise from it. my entire childhood was spent listening to them bitching to me about the other one saying that they were the most awful person . do i want that for my life? HELL NO! im terrifed of getting married and making the same mistakes they did, They made me afraid of meaningful relationships before I was ever in one. That's not to say they were not great parents, but great examples of marriage? No way!

Being single for decades. I did want to be married and propose to all my ex bfs but they all turned me down, fortunately. Looking back I was not a good marriage partner because my interest and activities were my priority. I am retired now and take care of my mother. Marriage is off my plate for good. I don’t have much time to do what I want therefore I am going to devote my physically and cognitively able years to fulfill my goals.

@cynque45

Жыл бұрын

You have a healthy perspective

@lucadesanctis563

10 ай бұрын

Hobbies should always be your first priority because they reflect who u are

@kailasac6532

5 ай бұрын

Oh wow, exactly in the same position here 😮 Good to see someone else too ❤❤❤ (except that I am not yet retired)

I’m almost 43 and never had a relationship. My way of thinking is if she’s not my Wife, it’s just my turn.

@yashsinghal1023

8 ай бұрын

Can you elaborate

@ashtoncasedy3237

Ай бұрын

Yes, elaborate ?​@@yashsinghal1023

The real reason why marriage is dying is money, for the upper class nothing really changes.

@hwway4488

Жыл бұрын

Couldn’t agree more

@counsela9240

Жыл бұрын

Yep

@markmower1746

Жыл бұрын

For richer or poorer....

@catharsismemory

Жыл бұрын

I think it's mostly people not wanting to commit, then money, etc. Also people paring with people who have conflicting personalities.

@hwway4488

Жыл бұрын

@@catharsismemoryit’s because of money that people don’t want to commit

In Japan, the decline in marriage and birth was preceded by a breakage in employment security. During our bubble era, jobs were more permanent and stable, but corporations couldn't handle keeping an aging workforce without exponential growth. Part-time workers and freelancers don't have the financial security to start families. And we lack physical space to grow further and remain sustainable.

@asekuvena

Жыл бұрын

The people are not sustainable. But it is great for *Japan* 🗾 to have a less distracted workforce.

@UXtatic

11 ай бұрын

Also, women are less willing to give up their careers upon marriage. Japan seems less willing to accept married women in the workforce. This worsens if they have children.

@ithinkiknowme6450

9 ай бұрын

@@UXtatichence the birth rate is also dropping

@MIchaelSybi

9 ай бұрын

The standards for new children have gown too, so it's not enough just to feed a child, he/she must be exceptional to be happy in this competitive world. If a person is an average one, his children will have a hard ime in the new world

@theblackswordsman9951

5 ай бұрын

@@asekuvena Doing nothing but work is detrimental to society tho, just look at the decline in birth rates. People need a more balanced life.

I been married with my wife for 10 years. I love every bit of my wife. How she smells, the way she talks, the way she looks at me, how she feeds me, all of it. I'm 36 years old and I never looked at another woman from the day I meet her. Any advice I can give anybody just from my own experience man or woman is listed below: 1. Marriege is 100% or nothing. Its all of you when you want or when you dont. 2. The best feeling of marriege is the hug after work, the smell of food and the sound of welcome greetings. 3. The small things matter. The more you remember the better. 4. Keep your word... especially to each other. Its the foundation your marriage is built on. 4. Test after test after test. Either it will make you or break you. 5. Never disrespct your partner in public or in front of anyone. Just bite your toungue and take it to the house. 5. Never talk to anybody about the ups and downs, the good or the bad. The state of your marriage only concerns you. 6. Smile, laugh, dance whatever you can do to enjoy each others company. The best marriages are like best friends. 6. Don't be so serious all the time, relax, laugh, kick back. 7. You marry his/her family.... remember that. 8. Jelousy lurks around every corner.... and 80% is not coming from your partner but people close to you. 9. Kids if you decide.... means its no longer about the two of you. 10. Kids will remind you why you love each other.

@DieselGlori

9 ай бұрын

This comment is EVERYTHING

@roses6564

4 ай бұрын

@@DieselGloriLots of sanctimony though.

@brennocalderan2201

16 күн бұрын

I felt like I'm in the 1950s reading this.

It’s wonderful that women now have the option to provide for themselves, so marriage is not an economic necessity. However as this has shifted, men and boys have not been given the tools to become desirable partners as women’s expectations have risen. Ironically, one of the most common challenges women face today is dealing with dysfunctional men, including husbands, fathers, and sons. For humanity to thrive, we need to treat men and women as equals. I hope we can see a future where people are free to marry based on a mutual desire to love each other and live as a team. It’s a beautiful thing when a husband and wife care for each other and their children, having made and kept that commitment of their own free will.

@waggoneer

8 ай бұрын

Men see modern women as quite dysfunctional as well. Women are not working to become desirable partners for men. A woman today brings less (that man cares about) to the marriage than ever before , and expects more from the men. This is why women initiate 80% of divorces . So what reason does a man have to "man up" for a woman?

@jordanwilson4182

2 ай бұрын

Women working is the single worst thing that has ever happpened to western society. Declining birth rates because no women have time to raise children means we have to bring in foreigners from countries that do have traditional marriage and stable birth rates. The way humans have not went extinct is because in the past men do all the work outside and women do all the work of raising children.

I’m of the millennial generation. A lot of us millennials saw our parents either divorce or in very unhappy or difficult marriages. We saw our parents struggle a lot. My parents are still married but have had a lot of very hard times, poor communication, a mismatch of values, lack of respect for eachother, ect. It hasn’t always been the easiest thing to witness. But they will never divorce. But my siblings and I have all chosen marriage or want to be married one day. There were a lot of happy times too growing up. We were all born in wedlock and we all want kids so marriage is the way to do that (or so we have all decided to believe). There is not a whole lot of divorce in my family. Some, but it is not the norm. I have noticed that the children of divorcees tend to divorce at higher rates than children of those who stayed married. I understand why many people choose not to marry though. Being married is a full-time job just in and of itself.

@jonathancunningham8739

5 ай бұрын

That is not really a real issue before having children see if both of you are mentally and emotionally ready Marriage can still be a very beautiful thing don't judge it by what your parents did make better decision with a partner people are so negative today and i was raised by a single mother many young couples still get married just make smart choices along that path if it is a path you want.

@roses6564

4 ай бұрын

Marital Longevity at the cost of quality of life. Humanity is insane.

My wife and I married in July of 1982. It has been a roller coaster ride, unimaginable highs, unbearable lows, curves, twists, turns and everything else that can be thrown in there. Has it been easy, not on your life, has it been worth it, every second of it. We've never worked so hard for anything, but we've done it, together. I have no concept of what my life would be like without her in it. I need her more than I need myself. This July will be 41 years married. We couldn't be much happier. I remember my Dad giving me the following advise, "Never stop courting your wife." And from my Mom, "Don't go to bed angry with each other." Words to stay married by.

@lazynow1

Жыл бұрын

This sounds like prison, where suicide is the only option.

@catherinebaxter8571

Жыл бұрын

We are also happily married 41 years this July! As a friend put it, you have to decide to be married and stay married, but I am so so grateful for my husband.

@normvw4053

Жыл бұрын

@@catherinebaxter8571 We, are in a very special minority...

@catherinebaxter8571

Жыл бұрын

@@normvw4053 Yes we are, and seriously, it's a shame. Marriage can be such a mutual support and bring stability and comfort as well a love and someone special to share special things with, like travels. We hardly even argue anymore, because the other person is not going to change anything at this point!

@normvw4053

Жыл бұрын

@@catherinebaxter8571 "We have lived and loved together, through many changing years; We have shared each other's gladness, and wept each other's tears, " Charles Jefferys, lyricist. Yes, yes...he sees it.

The reason why marriage is dying is also the same reason as to why most relationships are failing or being kept at something less serious and more open/casual...because it's becoming harder and harder to pay for things and that makes people end up focusing more and more on themselves rather than on others(which is kind of a requirement for most relationships to work).

@juliebella1221

Жыл бұрын

Truth. Even children in poverty have the same problems, you need money to participate. There were always the public school kids who went skiing with their family every year, Disney, what evs and then the rest. In America, no money means no life, no health, nada.

@flyinggoat2581

Жыл бұрын

Medieval peasants have entered the chat

@ReasonAboveEverything

11 ай бұрын

WEF is happy. You will own nothing and be happy. Gold standard was there for a reason.

@FlipTheBard

11 ай бұрын

@@ReasonAboveEverything What's WEF?

@tiphotisted

8 ай бұрын

I think part of that is a combination of inequality of income/resources as well as a lack of contentment. There are poor villages where the people are happy, but it's mostly because everybody is poor and there's nothing to be jealous of or pine for. In the US everybody is significantly better off than people in poor countries unless you're homeless, but there's a noticeable hierarchy of lower, middle, upperclass and rich folk living in close proximity where everyone and everything they own is being compared.

Marriage is mostly an economic arrangement, and always has been. Love etc. may be a significant motivating factor for entering the arrangement (particularly in modern times), but that doesn't change the nature of the arrangement itself. So, very understandably, mostly economic factors affect the institution of marriage and individual marriage choices and outcomes. Hence the strong correlation of marriage rates with social class, education and income levels in (post)modern society.

@stormchaser419

6 ай бұрын

Stop being a wage slave for a woman. Never marry.

@kailasac6532

5 ай бұрын

❤❤❤❤

This comment section is pain

Marriage was created to join two families for power and wealth. That was then changed for “love” which I can agree but the problem with love is, you fall in and out of love. Then with absolute freedom people don’t stick around and look for the next person and repeat the cycle. Almost like a new car. You love it when you first get it, but that fades and want something new.

@KGG2

Жыл бұрын

Totally agree

@kailasac6532

5 ай бұрын

❤❤❤❤

@dhirajgawande007

4 ай бұрын

This is so true. People fall in love do many times which makes you wonder what if the person you have married falls out of love with you

@jordanwilson4182

2 ай бұрын

@@dhirajgawande007if you fall out of love, you were never in love to begin with.

@dhirajgawande007

2 ай бұрын

@@jordanwilson4182 that's not true.

Many of us entering marriage age are from divorced homes and saw our parents get absolutely screwed. My parents split when I was 7 (both working, dad earning roughly 1.5x my mom's salary), and my mom won his pension, full custody and child support, alimony, and 100% of their joint non-retirement portfolio. My mom then moved us over an hour away only 3 years later, so I rarely got to see my dad who gave up so much for us... My dad became depressed due to all of this (as confirmed by his longtime girlfriend after the divorce), ended up retiring at 50 (despite no financial position to do so), and died penniless at 61. So yeah, no marriage for me, or at least not until 1) I'm a lot older and have my own assets that I can keep out of the marriage or 2) they fix the family courts to not absolutely ruin the higher earner or the parent who loses primary custody.

@BOSSDONMAN

Жыл бұрын

The courts are Gynocentric. They're not biased against the higher earner, as divorces with higher earning wives rarely pay out such proceedings.

@wobblebits

Жыл бұрын

That's a grim tale bro. I'm sorry for your dad and your loss. It's difficult to conceal property, assets or cash from marriage. That's especially true for anything obtained after getting married. It would take a Saul Goodman of a lawyer to help develop blind trusts or stuff like that. Winning move is not to play currently I guess.

@catsaresocute650

Жыл бұрын

That ruin is relative. If you make a marrige arraigment that means one party can earn less bc they do household work (including not being able to do overtime work etc - and even if you are divorced and not in a relationsip like marrige but co-parenting) then you need to finace the diffrences. What includes retirment money you would've accumelated (and that's overlooked by people who don't plan for the eventually of divorce, apprently). All in all get a prenup or marrige contract that makes clear what happens if you divorce and if you can't afford that you can't afford marrige. And in that also consider what happens to children.

@greglarson6293

Жыл бұрын

I lost six figures of retirement, most of the cash in the bank, had to pay alimony for three years (12 year marriage), and I have to pay child support close to $2k/month plus 70% of the kids expenses even though I have the kids 50% of the time. I’m in a blue state, so involved dads are penalized and dismissed. When my boys are old enough I’ll advise them against marriage unless the laws change.

@BOSSDONMAN

Жыл бұрын

@@greglarson6293 Was your wife a stay at home wife?

It appears to me that many marriages in my country are dysfunctional due to a lack of self-awareness. Divorce is not legally allowed, and things can become increasingly difficult for couples. This is an issue that requires immediate attention.

@dipanjanghosal1662

Жыл бұрын

damn which country?

@userone7057

Жыл бұрын

@@dipanjanghosal1662 Philippines

@userone7057

5 ай бұрын

people get into marriage for the wrong reasons :( @@recklessburn4724

Happily married 12 years and just had my sixth child. Life is good. My husband is a gentle and good man and I do not engage in mind games. We help each other and talk to each other kindly and without a sharp tongue. It works.

@kayann3

Жыл бұрын

Happy for you. How old were you when you had your first child?

@lwedel3361

Жыл бұрын

@@kayann3 27. 🙂

@Mmmtruk

Жыл бұрын

I’m wondering how you’re able to have 6 children in this modern day economical situation!

@mohammedmahdialshammari7006

Жыл бұрын

@@Mmmtruk by being selfish

@josron6088

Жыл бұрын

👍

I live in third world country and the problem is mainly the spouse's family. When you marry your spouse, you also marry their family. Imagine having to not only take care of your own family, but also your spouse's extended family. RIP all salary and it's especially worse when you're the only child

@tytiw516

Жыл бұрын

LOL, it depends who you marry. There is no rules, especially in islam to give your salary to support your spouse's extended family 😂

@swiftkarma4436

Жыл бұрын

That's why i am single. I don't want obligations

@FamilyIsGone

Жыл бұрын

​@@tytiw516 Islam people going MGTOW as well

@samanthatree85

Жыл бұрын

People should always separate culture from religion

@CaptinLongdong1

Жыл бұрын

Support extended family? Hell nah.

It is quite ironic that these days, people "claim" they don't get married based on economic dependence, but money is the major issue of marriage collapsing.

@brent4073

Жыл бұрын

Biggest predictor of divorce is the employment status of the male. Also, women typically file for divorce once they start out earning the husband.

@tomault3063

Жыл бұрын

You make a valid point, but as a gambler who married a woman making significantly more than I do, I can suggest that I could have ruined things pretty easily and not blamed her for walking away. Fortunately, I gave up betting on the ponies and we are on sound financial ground.

Yes marriage is dying as well as dating. Several reasons: 1. Swipe next mentality due to online dating and social media platforms. It makes it harder to meet and connect with people 2. increased divorce rates among boomers and older gen x'ers, resulting in younger gen x'ers and millennials having a less than idealistic view of marriage 3. the phasing out of the antiquated view that a woman's self worth is tied to her marital status. 4. Unrealistic expectations and self centered love - imperfect people desiring the perfect mate and wanting to be the taker in the relationship, but give very little to make it work. 5. HOOKUP CULTURE - this is the death of any chance of having a lasting and meaningful relationship. Hookup Culture rewires the brain to view people as objects of pleasure, rather than human beings to be loved and cared for. It destroys a persons ability to create connect and create bonds that will effectuate a healthy life long relationship with a partner/spouse. The brain rewires itself to solely equate intimacy with sex and pursue the same. This is counter-intuitive to the pursuit of marriage.

@jonathancunningham8739

5 ай бұрын

Dating and marriage is not dying did you not hear what he said it is only because of money if anything dating websites are actually losing lots of money and is losing popularity with us Gen Z all that is happening is that dating and marriage is just happening later however i have seen tons of Gen Z and Gen mil getting married were I am so no what you said seems very extreme and wrong. PS Hook Up culture is actually kind of dying.

I did not marry until 38. It was a long journey to reach that level where I was mature and responsible enough to take on a lifetime commitment. For the most part it was really good and a big life lesson, if you're willing to learn and have the humility to admit you're not always in the right. It ended 13 years later. Lesson learned there, don't take anything for granted no matter how content and secure it seems, and nothing lasts forever.

@MzAqua

8 ай бұрын

Why did it end?

@stormchaser419

6 ай бұрын

Don't make this same mistake again. Marriage to a woman is the most foolish thing a man can do.

@mnd7381

4 ай бұрын

How much did you lose in alimony?

Pass. I knew I didn't want to be married after hearing my mom and aunt discuss it. That was 21 years ago. i'm 31 now.

@eugenelawson5255

Жыл бұрын

Heading for the wall.

@markaurelius61

Жыл бұрын

What were your female relatives saying about marriage?

@stevecooper7883

Жыл бұрын

​@@markaurelius61 They probably belittled their husbands a lot or something

It takes maturity, kindness, love, an understanding of one’s self and empathy for your partner to make a good marriage.

@dalemanolas5994

11 ай бұрын

Well that's western society doomed then.

I don't know what to say about marriage other than I did not find it meaningful. It was a second job I came home to after my professional job. My generation of males were very progressive when it came to women's right to work, to initiate sex, to have sex outside of marriage, and take care of birth control. However, they were very traditional once in marriage. It was all "you work, your raise the kids, you cook, you clean, you can have it all, but don't expect me to help out, and oh by the way, I want a rigorous round of sex tonight," kind of life. It was exhausting. It was much better once I got out and on my own. I honestly don't know why anyone would want marriage these days.

@swatisaini6447

Жыл бұрын

So sorry your partner was an a***hole

Friendship is not a consolation prize, it's a prerequisite. My late wife of 22 years was my best friend, and that's why our marriage was good.

I am female & in my 60’s now. I married far too young under religious pressure & divorced early. Sadly I remember my grandmother telling me she wished she could have divorced my tyrannical grandfather, but she “had 4 children & nowhere to go.” I remarried much later in life and have two terrific daughters. I was a much better parent because of my life experience & maturity. The marriage has had its challenges, but endures - again because of maturity & experience. But also, I believe, because I can walk away - financially & emotionally- if need be. This forces both sides to put in the work, compromise, & be respectful & supportive long after the infatuation fades. Something my grandmother would have cherished.

@daycrow8651

Жыл бұрын

are the vows literally not “ for better or worse”?

@kali7055

Жыл бұрын

@@daycrow8651 „Better or worse“ does not include physical and mental abuse, cheating and complete dependancy. Or just sheer incompatibility. How should an arranged or pressured marriage work if the partners don‘t like each other or treat each other well, aren‘t attracted and fight constantly? Vows don‘t mean anything if the solid base and a good relationship isn‘t there

@daycrow8651

Жыл бұрын

@@kali7055 How do all of you women magically marry abusive men? This is literally what every single one of you say when a relationship or marriage doesn’t work

@sweetpoptart9486

Жыл бұрын

​@@daycrow8651 Because manipulative/abusive people hide their true colors. Never of the concept of lying?

@daycrow8651

Жыл бұрын

@@sweetpoptart9486 the point was women at large pick men for the wrong reasons

Marriage takes a lot of mental, emotional and physical energy. For some it’s not worth it.

@derikuk2967

Жыл бұрын

With divorce laws as written, the risks are too great for any man. It's not worth it anymore.

I grew up in the late 60's and early 70's with a mother who was socially and financially the head of the household. This brought us a bit of scorn from the neighborhood 'housewives' who believed my mother should just stay home and cook. But I found the egalitarian marriage of my parents to be refreshing and inspiring. One thing I would say is that the stricter definitions of marriage 50 years ago provided convenient cover for some of our human shortcomings. Men especially could leverage their self-appointed 'superiority' for all kinds of indiscretions. These days, neither partner has much wiggle room to get off the hook. I think the message here is that all of us, be it female, male, non-binary--even groups, governments and societies--must work hard to keep and foster relationships. For those that do, marriage and all kinds of other relationships offer more benefits than ever, not just to ourselves, but for the greater good.

@akunnayakalunta4448

Жыл бұрын

"Self- appointed superiority "😅. This phrase alone is what is killing marriage.

@theloquaciouslady

Жыл бұрын

Yet you boast about your mother's self-appointed superiority. That is not egalitarian.

@matthewr3986

Жыл бұрын

That's nice hippie. Stfu now.

@tomault3063

Жыл бұрын

@@theloquaciouslady you don't even know what egalitarian means. it's equal opportunity, not outcome.

@bradleymosman8325

11 ай бұрын

Forget the "self-appointed superiority" shtick. Rethink it when you're under a house laying in a mud hole to repair a furnace while your partner suffered terribly washing dishes.

The guy didn't mention how divorce screws men over and leading cause of divorce is marriage.

@afreen5058

Жыл бұрын

How isn’t the leading cause of divorce marriage? You can’t divorce unless you are married. I do agree this guy was definitely giving women more spotlight in the video.

@jamisonbernhardt3310

Жыл бұрын

Genius.

@sydenym9986

3 ай бұрын

Well, sometimes it screws women over. It's hard on both sides, men and women.

@ARandomDonut

3 ай бұрын

We got captain obvious over here "leading cause of divorce is marriage" This guy is literally Einstein, I never would have figured this out myself For fucks sake

@cheezedoodlenygguh6229

3 ай бұрын

@sydenym9986 The MAJORITY of the time, men are screwed over.

I believe marriage is becoming a thing of the past. None of my friends in their 30s are married or seriosly planning to have a wedding at all. People are buying homes, having children, stay in longterm commited relationships - just without being married. My partner and I have been together for 10+ years and we don't see what getting married would add to our lives. It has no religious or traditional meaning for us and we are not interested in planning or celebrating a wedding (let alone paying for it). So there's no reason why we would pursue it at this point. (for context: We are millenials living in Germany)

@bubblysquirrel1847

Жыл бұрын

Exactly my thought. If you love and are committed to your partner, you should be like this either married or not. It’s the same relationship, same person, nothing really added to the partnership. Marriage for me is just a contract made based on societal norms that can just possibly benefit the children or the relationship a bit more than outside marriage (e.g. covid situation - when if you were in an international relationship, only spouse or family was allowed to travel to see you).

@lawv804

Жыл бұрын

Two people do not need a piece of paper from the state to have a long lasting and loving relationship, or to have kids. The state should not be involved in people's romantic lives.

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

Europe is a lot more progressive than the states.

@afreen5058

Жыл бұрын

Do you get any tax benefits for marriage?

@LillyJeanne

Жыл бұрын

@@afreen5058 only if we would earn very differently. Since we make about the same and don't plan for one of us to go part time, it's no benefit.

Marriage is dying , but divorce is flourishing.

As you said, we are now a society based on equality, and yet so many of our laws like marriage, divorce and even the military draft are still based on outdated male/female traditional roles.

Marriage is a big financial risk for men in a society where the law and the narrative is shamefully biased against men and favor women . Men don't get married, women are smarter in hiring good lawyers and take away your hard earned money, your house and seperate you from your kids. Learn from the great football player Hakimi in this regard

As a guy who doesn't plan on never marrying, it's all because there's zero benefits of Marriage that I wouldn't get if I didn't. There's more negative possibilities of marrying than not. So I'm out. Luckily I didn't want to have kids and I will never have kids. I chose to dodge both bullets; marriage and having kids

@elultimo102

Жыл бұрын

I realize it's politically incorrect, but I believe in eugenics. While I almost have a Mensa IQ, I'm a physical SUBFIVE---Short, fat, bad eyes, and a head full of dying hair. (Think Geo. Costanza). Not the best breeding stock to populate a colony on Mars. Thus, I chose not to perpetuate the problem.

@FirstHandLLC

Жыл бұрын

@@elultimo102 Same, guys hate to go out with me with other women present as they're all start talking to me non-stop and ignore other guys lol. It's not because I look good. I'm pretty short, bald, crooked teeth, chubby and so on. My genes are all screwed up as I was born with six fingers, suffer from high blood pressure, liver and heart problems, cholesterol, allergies. I would hate to pass it along to my child, so I chose not to have any. Shitty genes should die out, I wish more people would look at themselves realistically and realize that fact.

@dipanjanghosal1662

Жыл бұрын

@@FirstHandLLC exactly. Why would you make your children suffer when you can stop it?

Married for 34 years. It's been a ride, up and down, but we still hang out and do things together, so we'll keep going I guess.

@dees900

Жыл бұрын

well done bro

@elotro-qx4sw

Жыл бұрын

Im guessing you’re the one that got cheated on😂🤣🤣

@rjung_ch

Жыл бұрын

@@elotro-qx4sw the other, you can guess what you want to. Go for it 🤣🤣🤣

@elotro-qx4sw

Жыл бұрын

@@rjung_ch yet here you are right?🤡

@rjung_ch

Жыл бұрын

@@elotro-qx4sw you are here too, or is that the other troll using the same account?

He didn't mention the outdated and unfair alimony and child support laws

I just want a partner without the government or religion getting involved in either of our finances or sex lives, free from the pressure of needing to bare and raise children, and the power to support our individual goals without the need for constant fairytale levels of romantic showmanship. It’s financially and emotionally unfeasible in these modern times.

@sudhirchandra9790

Жыл бұрын

So apart from pressure of religion, government u don't want the pressure of marketing companies on your marriage I too think like u

@Jwet1100

Жыл бұрын

@@sudhirchandra9790 that and also social pressure.

@Purplelemon5033

11 ай бұрын

This is why gay men are so happy😂

@ithinkiknowme6450

9 ай бұрын

@@Purplelemon5033exactly.. I wish i was lesbian 😭😭😭 Maybe we should all just become gay and have kids and get together once a year to have heterosexual intercourse and after nine months..gays should take the boys and lesbians should take the girls and live happily ever after 😂😂😂

@user-wo1gb9tu7d

9 ай бұрын

This🎉🎉

People are living longer and some are blessed to find "the one" much later in life nowadays. My husband and I met when we were in our late 50s, been married 3 years now and both of us are grateful every day that we found one another. The only downside is we don't have many years left to spend together, but we endeavor to appreciate every minute we do have 🙂

@user-kpkxgtj

Жыл бұрын

Barring any accidents or illnesses, it is quite likely you will have many happy years together to enjoy life and each other 😊

@elchinoguerito8915

Жыл бұрын

That’s lovely. Gives me hope as a young man who feels like I’ll never meet someone like that again. Thank you for sharing (: I wish the best for you and your husband

@Bellaa4578

Жыл бұрын

Aw! Late 50s is still Young if you live to be in your 80s! I think it’s great to meet someone later in life

@user-kpkxgtj

Жыл бұрын

@@Bellaa4578 exactly! It's a very distinct possibility they could have a solid 30+ years together, maybe more ❤️

@TheEmaile

Жыл бұрын

I’m 47 and never wanted to get married because I never wanted to get divorced. About 10 years ago a co-worker in her 60’s got married and seeing her joy and youthfulness being in love opened my eyes and made me think that maybe I’d wait til I was her age to get married. I still hold the idea that I will find a life partner in the next decade. The older I get, the more comfortable I feel being single. Maybe because I’ve never been tied down and got to travel my whole life, while my married friend’s lives have remained quite the same as they were when they married 20 years ago. Anyway, it’s nice to read stories like yours. Wish you a long & happy life together!

Never thought of marriage, not once in my life, now in my 60s.

@orangeninja912

Жыл бұрын

Fibber

@the1stmetalhead

Жыл бұрын

Good for you. But most people are gonna want some sort of intimacy and connection in their life. Since the majority of us don't actually have a greater purpose to distract ourselves like Swami Vivekananda or APJ Abdul Kalam.

@aubreyplazasuncle

Жыл бұрын

@@SmugCat85 I'm just like you but I'm a 20 year old woman. I love that.

@catfish_666

Жыл бұрын

W

@Nerval-kg9sm

Жыл бұрын

Me neither, and I'm 51.

I married when I was 21. My wife was 19. I got the best years of her life. We had three kids before her health began to fail. She died at 58.

@richardscathouse

Жыл бұрын

That's the way life is supposed to be. Peasants were never meant to live past 60 or retire. 😢

@jeromebarry1741

Жыл бұрын

@@richardscathouse Au contraire. 3 score and 10 is the measure of a healthy peasants life.

its a lack of money issue,living from paycheck to paycheck,i don t see how can i get married,work all 7days where you can barely see your significant other,take care of the house nd provide for children when we r not sure whether we gonna make it to next month's rent,sad times we live in,for real💔💔💔

@richardscathouse

Жыл бұрын

I'll never try to get married or have children in America 😢

@spiritedaway99

Жыл бұрын

@@richardscathouse me neither!!

As a professional wedding photographer, Although I'm a Father to two and unwed, I can completely agree with everything mentioned in this video. I truly believe you should only marry someone when it feels right, not forced or pressured. The amount of times I've been questioned about it and feel like I have to joke off why I'm not, I'm a brilliant dad, busy businessman, and I do well by everyone in my family, why does marriage have to determine me or my direction. I've witness people CLEARLY not suited for eachother, and I can physically see and it's a shame I know when couples are genuine, or if there are other motives behind people getting married. It's beautiful, and a real shame all in one. Great video.

@jmccoomber1659

Жыл бұрын

Also a wedding photographer and minister so I totally get what you're saying. it's sad when it's so obvious by the actions of the bride and groom before and during the wedding make it clear the relationship is doomed. Thankfully, getting to share an extraordinary day with two people who are obviously in a loving and respectful relationship makes up for the ones where the couple should be running in opposite directions. Marriage can be the best of all partnerships or a soul-killing slog, it's up to the two adults who created it to keep making the next right decision and learning to "zip it" when a derogatory thought tries to escape one's mouth. Belittling and complaining never elicits change in another person, only distance and contempt.

@herweirdoo0904

Жыл бұрын

Where do you get love and intimacy from, if not form your wife ? The likely answer is, from girlfriends If so then you're raising your kids in an environment where they don't get to see what a permanent relationship looks like. Which might lead to them having trouble with relationships in their own life "Oh dad keeps bringing different women home all the time, so that must be okay"

@user-kpkxgtj

Жыл бұрын

@@herweirdoo0904 *A* girlfriend maybe, not necessarily girlfriendS? Marriage and having children are mutually exclusive, It's very possible to raise children with one person without getting married to the perosn. And being unmarried doesn't automatically mean he's having relations with a multitude of women.

@herweirdoo0904

Жыл бұрын

@@user-kpkxgtj marriage and having children are mutually exclusive? So you think singe parenthood is not an anomaly and is something that should be accepted?

@LiamAaronGillan

Жыл бұрын

@@herweirdoo0904 flip that situation though my friend, when they grow up and realise, wow, Dad took his mental health into account and decided to do what’s best for himself and us. In your specific scenario, that’s just a basic marriage with no story behind why someone or what I think you’re insinuating “me”, is a commitment issue without knowing any backstory.

Having left a bad marriage a decade ago, I have mixed feelings on this topic. My own experience with marriage leads me to say good riddance to what amounts to slavery with a slightly hipper wrap but the hopeless romantic in me still clings to the idea that marriage could be a force for good in the world.

@swatisaini6447

Жыл бұрын

Never ending dilemma! Marriage has both benefits and disadvantages

@jessicayoung3656

Жыл бұрын

It depends on who you are married to

@dr.redphdleasurestudies.5399

Жыл бұрын

@@jessicayoung3656 Not really. Legally speaking marriage has been reduced to a wealth redistribution device and divorce is the new normal. Being over 40yo myself all the loyal women in my age group are taken and will stay that way until widowed in the coming decades.

@FamilyIsGone

Жыл бұрын

​@@jessicayoung3656 nope that's why MGTOW is getting extremely popular in USA

@jessicayoung3656

Жыл бұрын

@@FamilyIsGone And those men are losers but carry on with your hate. You hurt no one but yourself

There is no part of me that wants to get married or ever have children.

I am a man in a long term relationship and my girlfriend keeps asking where her ring is. We’ve been together for 6 years. What frustrates me is women these days like to pick and choose the traditions they want to follow. They want to be strong independent women but want to be taken care of 😑so many contradictions.

Listening to women, especially older women talk about their marriage made me absolutely hate the idea. I decided from a young age to fullfil my life first and if I meet the right person along the way then I'll think about marriage. Other than that it's a NOPE for me....too stressful. I would rather work in the hospital instead.

We were teenage sweethearts, who married in our 20’s, and now have three beautiful intelligent children. I thank God everyday for my wonderful wife and life!

@lgnfve

Жыл бұрын

do you think the guys saw the divorce coming ?

@twinturbo3470

Жыл бұрын

would she say the same?........or just say "meh" in regards to being married?

@mdraj5655

Жыл бұрын

Don't listen to negative comments, Someone people just can't handle seeing other people happy. I hope you and your family will have a wonderful life.

@tuele4302

Жыл бұрын

Why don't you thank yourself and your wife instead?

@MartellMedia2

11 ай бұрын

OK boomer

People are too much trouble now a days. I've learned to enjoy my own company and avoid others as much as possible.

Marriage was never "funadamentally based on female dependence". The fundamental basis of a true marriage is; exclusivity, mutual service, shared sacrifice. Marriage has never changed, only our expectations of it have.

I think marriage licenses should have expiration dates to be renewed at little to no fee by people that value it and want to stay together.

@iche9373

Жыл бұрын

But what about Rick Astley's credo?

@arifbagusprakoso2308

Жыл бұрын

What about the children? Witnessing his/her parent splitting apart because of being "lazy" to renew the license will break his/her trust for relationship.

@kfk256

Жыл бұрын

@@arifbagusprakoso2308 If the parents value it and everything that can be affected by not renewing, then they won't be lazy about it. Much better than children witnessing a loveless and bitter marriage.

@nastyayoyo4963

Жыл бұрын

@@kfk256 Lol, the vows would have to be changed, not "till death do us part" anymore haha but "till this license expires, I guess". The idea is not gonna fly, anyway. The older one gets, the more one's life is ran by inertia. I'm probably low-key depressed, but I don't want to go through a change if I can help it. There are things I don't like about my current job and/or my current home, but if net gain is still +ve, I'm not compelled to chase a bigger net +ve. Most adults are like that. My passport expired last year and I'm still not that bothered to renew it coz I don't need to travel yet. I imagine making a marriage license renewable would cause so many marriages to expire because people simply forget to renew the license. My own parent's marriage has no romance anymore, but they're fine. They're just an old man and old woman being somewhat friends. No reason to make them "divorced through inaction". I'm sure a lot of old couples are in similar situations.

@kfk256

Жыл бұрын

@@nastyayoyo4963 I guess over 65 can qualify for homestead 🤣🤣🤣

Marry when you feel ready. Not when you feel pressured. I am 28. Some of my friends and married and some are not. It doesn’t matter if they are a man or woman. We shouldn’t feel down because of what people are doing or not doing. You don’t need to impress anyone with your life choices.

@philipehusani

Жыл бұрын

If you want kids, surely there will be pressure on most older women. Given that by the age of 30, 90% of a woman's eggs are gone... It gets harder to have kids and carry babies to term as you age past 30.

@acustomer7216

Жыл бұрын

Women don't "lose" eggs as they age. Very many women conceive naturally & have healthy children after age 30. I had 2, the 2nd at 37.

@philipehusani

Жыл бұрын

@@acustomer7216 Ma'am good for you. By 30, women have lost 90% of their eggs, by 35, it's a high risk pregnancy... Just because you had a kid at 37, that doesn't mean every woman can. Your personal experience does not reflect the realities of everyone. From 30, a woman's fertility decreases exponentially.

@KP-5928

Жыл бұрын

@@philipehusani almost every friend i have had at least one kid after marriage. women still have many eggs in their thirties. we start with 2 million...

@chadcadsonvii5258

Жыл бұрын

Then youll probably be one of the unmarried childless women jp Morgan forecasted. Good luck. (if only women realised that their mate preferences were different to men's, the world would be a better place.)

if i had treated marriage more like a business and focused on it as an exchange of goods and titles, i would have been married by now. i really messed up by prioritizing love and compatibility.

@cheeseplease2832

Жыл бұрын

Nope, I treat marriage more like a business, but still didn't get lucky to get married. It's really just fate at the end.

@roses6564

4 ай бұрын

You don't want to be married just for an exchange of goods and titles. It's very depressing, especially if that status would prevent you from getting together with a wonderful person you met later on.

I'm not married and have zero regrets about it. I'm financially independent, strong, healthy, and free to make my own choices and am comfortable in my skin. When I was with my ex for 15 years, I desperately saw him as 'the one' but he would literally laugh in my face whenever I brought up the idea of marriage. Then he broke up with me because he said he 'wanted a partner to settle down and have kids'. I see things now very differently and I thank my lucky stars every day I didn't marry him, because love makes you ignore SO MANY red flags. I wake up everyday feeling great about myself and every night knowing I had a full productive day, just doing whatever makes ME feel good. I have no interest in dating. It's nice to be single.

@JesusIsKing578

11 ай бұрын

I'm glad that you are living a happy life being single if that is your calling, that's totally fine. But I would caution that MANY women in similar situations as you (single, financially independent, etc) grow old and regretting not having a family. There have been countless testimonies about women who thought their successful career and independence would make them happy, coming to find out that a family was really what they wanted. And unfortunately, they come to that solution when its too late. This is a good question to consider, if you found a good man who loved you and he proposed, would you say yes? I think your ex, who acted like a jerk and terrible toward you BTW, scared you away from pursuing a relationship with a potentially amazing guy. Now again, if you truly have no desire to get married, that's okay. But marriage is such an amazing thing and starting a family is so accomplishing. Money and success can only fulfill you for so long, but a family and being with people who love you is much more worthwhile.

I've recently come to the conclusion that marriage is exclusive for rich people.

@RicochetForce

Жыл бұрын

That's increasingly becoming the case. Rich people are still marrying, staying together longer and living the nuclear family lifestyle model. The continuing economic and societal collapse leading to more people to fall into poverty has lead to a severe drop in marriage and marriage resilience in lower socioeconomic levels.

The fact that we get free videos on KZread by Richard is truly a gift. 👍👍👍 By the way, may I also remind you the fact that our Native American population in our motherland, the Continent of America before the European Colonizers arrived, was around 15 millions, while the European population in their motherland, the Continent of Europe was around 25 millions. - Today, Native American population is 15 million, while the European population, in the Continents of America + Europe, is a staggering TWO BILLION! A shockingly sad truth. 😔 - In my humble opinion, it's about time to decolonize the Colonized lands, and return it to rightful owners Native American people. Notorious global cardinal crimes the Christian West has committed, and benefited a great deals, such as Slavery & Colonialism had long been over, why on earth is notorious Colonization still lingering on, may I ask? 😔

@SylentMilo

Жыл бұрын

Stop Sucking Dick

@OP941nine

Жыл бұрын

Not really, we pay by watching the advertisement... unless you have KZread premium then is not free because you pay for ad free service.

@eu.lucaslara

Жыл бұрын

@@OP941nine adblock lol

@the1stmetalhead

Жыл бұрын

Truly he's gonna be at the forefront when talking about issues related to men's health and discrimination.

@paulusjeffryjosepayyappilly

Жыл бұрын

You're paying him with your time and validation so he can increase his own personal reach. He needs your validation for his personal opinions so he can feel he is working just as the rest of us would like to feel. He doesn't need your money. His basic needs have probably already been met. 🙏🏻

You can be forever together with your love and not get married. In sweden it's called "sambo" - it gives you all the government benefits just without an actual marriage.

Works for me. I have a child and I'm not stuck being married to someone who will detract from my life. I don't have to worry about a woman stealing my assets through divorce. I'm in my mid 40s and I have less than 10 years until retirement. At this point I can't even chance getting married because of the extremely high potential for it to destroy my life.

@estherkasozi4202

8 ай бұрын

Lol prenupt?

I can't get where I want to go without the support, love and encouragement of my husband. Don't care if it's "on trend". My marriage is my biggest asset. If you don't have a vision for your union and relationship skills, it will fall apart.

@kailasac6532

5 ай бұрын

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Ever since I was 18 (back in the mid 90s), married men have been telling me not to get married. I listened, and 29 years later, couldn't be happier.

@DefenestrateYourself

Жыл бұрын

That option was right for you. For others, it would lead to loneliness and being unfulfilled. Everyone is entitled to a choice

@Eye_of_Horus

Жыл бұрын

The odds are pretty bad, so that's probably why you heard that a lot. For a lifelong happy marriage its somewhere between a 13% and 36% success rate.

@InlandDiscoEmpire

Жыл бұрын

Based

@derikuk2967

Жыл бұрын

@@DefenestrateYourself There is no fulfillment in being married to a cheating slut... and then she gets money and prizes when she leaves.

@juliebella1221

Жыл бұрын

Same for us girls. We were told, "all men want is a nurse or a purse." LOL!! And I don't like weddings. Seriously boring. Or pervy if they say both are virgins and all know what they'll be doing that night, talk about creepy pressure in the most gross of ways. Weird. Many of us are forced to at least be in or attend a wedding. You know, your sister gets married so you HAVE to be in it, and then other relatives and it's like, why are bridesmaids dresses so ugly??? And the hair and make up, you're like does he know what you look like naturally??? Women completely look different with make up on and how many have fake boobs? So, it's really the idealized version of herself he's marrying. And then what kind of man marries a woman with fake boobs, like that's gross too. Weird. He already doesn't like you for you. Clue number one. It's just creepy being behind the scenes. Never mind the bachelor and bachelorette parties - cheating the day before you're married....um...what??? Bartenders and make up artists, we see behind the glossy photos....lol!!!! One day people will get married with face apps on their actual faces, called, "the ideal me..." or some such nonsense. LOL!! Gen X best generation Evah!! :)

For the woman - it is all win win. For the man - it is a potential major financial risk. Blame the Courts and Lawyers.

I am not married as yet but two things that I have heard in my life journey that has stuck with me about marriage. #1 Marry a friend. If you and her are friends, it means that you share some ideas and thought processes and can compromise with them and are able to communicate with each other. #2 Marry someone who you would open a joint account with. Finances are detrimental and very important for everything in life, especially progress. If you can't trust this person with money or can see that this person lives a lifestyle that would destroy something valuable to the success of a relationship and the future of the family, then they are not marriage material. That's because you will be sharing everything with this person.

Marriage should be two individuals who support each other and truly love each other (that includes loving the stuff you hate about your partner) instead of two people relying on each other.

I feel like younger generations, were given the advice of not to marry and choose career over marriage by the older generation. I feel that this has to do with the fact that marriage means settling and younger generations don’t like the word of settling, We like freedom, and able to get up and go somewhere or do something different.

@juliebella1221

Жыл бұрын

No, they told them not to marry and not to breed because they knew that Roe was still under the chopping block and the axe was coming down and they were right. So now many women are doubling down on no thank you. People forget, many abortions are done by married couples. There is too much outside control in the marriage bed and it's freaking people out, rightfully so.

Men are not interested in entering contract where the other party is incentivised to break.

Marriage is a unique contract in American society, as it is one of the few arrangements where a party can potentially obtain considerable financial benefits and authority over their offspring by solely choosing to dissolve the agreement.

@Ziegfried82

9 ай бұрын

It's a ripoff for men.

The role of marriage is to bind two people who are willing to make an absolute commitment to each other. But that means those who are married must ignore politics and reinforce that commitment every day.

@admiralkrankandhismightyba158

Жыл бұрын

Yes. And must avoid selfishness that leads to spouses leading separate lives. Which can happen gradually and by imperceptible degrees.

@printempseternel

Жыл бұрын

Yes, they must ignore a lot of things.Not influenced by the outside but open enough to interact..

@faethe000

9 ай бұрын

Politics are an extension of your morality and values. There's no ignoring it.

Given how easy it is for people to cheat on each other marriage is becoming obsolete, & honestly I don't know why people who want to be unfaithful get married in the first place?

I would consider marriage again if it didn't come with a legal contract. Committed relationships can be very beneficial for people, but I don't think it's fair to have legal & financial advantages over people who are single. Let's focus equality there!

I tell you, from my perspective as a man, what marriage will be like in the future. fisherman (men) fishing in the river (environment/culture), and that river is heavily polluted and toxic, then he innocently ate (married) that fish and got poisoned (divorced) for it. What do you think other fishermen would think about it? Some fishermen might think it was bad luck or an accident, but because many of them are hungry and desperate, they keep fishing and get poisoned too. Then what happened next? Some fishermen would try to find the problem; they would go to the river source (law), only to find out it had been polluted too. Then they would go to their leader (the government) to get solutions, but they got blame instead. Then what happened next was that the fishermen would start telling their friends to stop eating or fishing in this river and go to another river (abroad). They will inform one another until everyone stops eating fish in this river. The fisherman might keep fishing in this river, but no one would dare eat any of the fish inside, so they would release it again and again in full circle (cum and dump). Make it like a game, but no sane fisherman would ever eat any of it. And from the look of it, the future of marriage would be just that.

Its a beautiful thing to feel with all your heart, that you have a partner along the road until the end.Being one for eachother,just for eachothers,in good and bad,doesn't matter what will happen.Marriage should be both of the partners agreeing on that, officially and publicly.

@mikicerise6250

Жыл бұрын

I wouldn't know. I've never met anyone who wasn't ultimately there only for themselves.

@phoenixrisin2269

10 ай бұрын

With a pre nup or blind trust.

Marriage is essentially a life long promise. You promise to your partner that you will never leave himher. However, in a world where promises are seen as holding someone hostage, the meaning of marriage goes out the window. Some people believe in a life without promises, without commitments. But if I can switch partner at any moment, that also mean another man can replace me at anytime, without reason. Imagine being scared everyday that your partner is going to leave you. That amount of attention taken away fron you could have been way better spent on yourself, making yourself grow, and making your partner grow. Thats why i think marriage is so important. Unfortunately divorce has been made easy to the point to defeat the purpose of marriage. Still, if two people can sign a contract where they promise their commitment to eachother, they set eachother up for unconditional love

@juliebella1221

Жыл бұрын

Yes, but that is naive. It leaves neither person room to grow into full adults. If it's not cheating etc., most marriages dissolve due to one person growing, gaining knowledge, while the other is still the same old same old. I knew of one couple back in the day. T.V. had just gotten into middle class working man's homes and this dude, who's the master of the house, simply because God and Country say so, thought Archie Bunker and Edith were really married. He didn't understand the light box was just actors. He thought it was real life. No one could tell him otherwise because "I'm the gaza!!" He would boom. Or what about men who watch football every damn year, so boring for the wife to know the fall means Thursday - Sunday, blah, blah, blah. I know so many women, that the moment the last child moved out of the house she filed for divorce. She was bored to tears daily. And I'm sure there are men that feel the same way about their wives doing the same old same old. Our brains are like trees, they need to grow. :)

@thermologo3451

Жыл бұрын

​@@juliebella1221 This is why most women do not deserve to be married and the stats are showing that. Eventually marriage disappear from society.

@hanatemonstas4485

Жыл бұрын

Weird given how so many men especially in the older generations describe marriage to be shackles that limits their freedom. If marriage is important, then its all the more reason people should think carefully who to marry rather than doing it willy nilly and then divorce later. The decline a healthy sign of this.

A big set of issues regarding marriage are the expenditure expectations surrounding everything from the initial proposal to the wedding, first anniversary, and any milestones regarding children: a diamond ring with a value of at least two months' of the man's gross salary; a huge, catered engagement party in an event hall, bridal shower, bachelor party, bachelorette party, over-the-top wedding that costs about a year's salary (not including the honeymoon). Rinse and repeat for a baby shower (for the first child), party surrounding the child's religious naming (christening, baptism, brit millah, etc.), first birthday party, major religious event parties (First Communion, Confirmation, Bar/Bat Mitzvah, Baptism in anabaptist churches), Quinceanera/Sweet Sixteen, high school graduation, university graduation... This above and beyond the regular cost of living (in this area of the country, you need at least $100k/yr just to survive!) and the usual (and not always plannable-for) major life expenses....

This is a great example of how media can influence our view of the world. We are in our late 60’s and travel a lot. My 40 year old son travels far more than we do. He taught me to completely ignore the medias view of the world. Look around through a different lens. This is a great world we live in. People are as loving today as they were yesterday. Couples are still falling in love, getting married and having a family. The problem with social media is we are having difficulty separating what’s real reality from social media reality.

No cohabitation No marriage No divorce No Alimony No child support Result happy life...😁😎

@Dhruv_Dogra

Жыл бұрын

Lonely old age Lonely and miserable death

@shubhamsingh-gl1fh

Жыл бұрын

@@Dhruv_Dogra it's better to die lonely than being with a women...i will live as free man whereas you will be slave to your wife....and also men can handle loneliness better than women...

@Dhruv_Dogra

Жыл бұрын

@@shubhamsingh-gl1fh who told you I have a wife, you fool? Aise hi Hawa mey??

@shubhamsingh-gl1fh

Жыл бұрын

@@Dhruv_Dogra haa to acha hai ki wife nhi hai....

@Bobbyfuckingaxelrod

Жыл бұрын

That’s a miserable life and one full of cope.

If you think marriage is about love, then don’t get married. People fall in and out of love very easily. However, if you’re looking for a strong partnership and family is important, then marriage should be considered an option because society still favors families economically vs being single. Hopefully the pressure of being single in modern society starts to change because it’s unfair for people who choose not to be married. It’s just another example of how religious traditions still control us even today

@sidneyboo9704

Жыл бұрын

I agree with this. Thankfully I still love my spouse but both of us entered this marriage talking about goals in life as oppose to love in the long term.

@SmackDabCola

Жыл бұрын

@joe seabreeze Lamo religious traditions won't die out with that goal in mind of being single; all ideas die if there is no inheritance.

@elultimo102

Жыл бұрын

Protestant Work Ethic----One reason this is about the only civilized country without mandatory paid sick leave, paid vacation, and government-paid medical.

@joeseabreeze

Жыл бұрын

@@Jedimack7 Did you miss my statement: "society still favors families economically vs being single"? The incentive for getting married shouldn't be for financial relief, but that's how society in the US is still structured even though it also puts financial pressure on us to bring in a dual income (i.e. it's messed up). So the person who chooses to be single and live alone has the most financial pressure. It makes absolutely no sense for marriage to offset the financial pressure of a single person. For example, a person who chooses to be single and live alone should be the one who's eligible for tax breaks. Instead, they give the tax breaks to the dual income couple. So now imagine being single, buying a house, paying the mortgage yourself (and everything else in the household), and being in a higher tax bracket than a married couple with dual incomes who share the bills. You really think that's fair? LOL It's even more backwards now that feminism is finally making progress.

@V.D.22

Жыл бұрын

​@@joeseabreeze it's like when the communists in Eastern Europe paid families to have more children

The happiest people at a wedding: lawyers.

@sydenym9986

3 ай бұрын

Hahaahah nice one 🤣

I had an empty nest divorce that cost me over $100k over 6 years. She left for a young guy (like 10 years). Hid that they lived together (to avoid including his income in the spousal support computations). And I had to pay for her attorney fees. At one point she was making $200k as a realtor and I made close to half but had to pay spousal support. I only got off the hook when she tried to hide money not provided in discovery. Which in my state would make her owe me triple was she hid. Instead I just got a finalization decree. Because I didn’t trust leaving it up to the court to decide would fall in my favor? Nothing else did.

It should have no role. It means nothing. I got married, divorced, and will NEVER marry again. Getting married is one of my biggest regrets.

@lazynow1

Жыл бұрын

Men get treated like criminals going through divorce court, and the women are always the victim no matter what.

My girlfriend and I have talked about marriage a few times and we don’t really see any benefit. We are raising our 5 year old son and have been living together for about 7 years. Most days are great! Sometimes we argue but that’s normal in any relationship/family. We do not have a joint bank account. We are not religious and both come from broken homes. I believe that plays a major part in our subconscious not to get married as well.

@gailainsley6939

Жыл бұрын

Mmm interesting. Women always want to marry a man that they love and respect. Does she earn more than you or something? I’ve noticed it’s women who earn more than the guy that do not care if he marries her or not. It’s like They almost have one foot out of the door or something.

@hybras

Жыл бұрын

You 2 seem married in all but name! I'm happy for u 2. Consider going to therapy to work through these traumas, and see if your mind changes afterwards!

@demisemedia

Жыл бұрын

@@hybras Thank you! Sometimes people will ask how "My wife" is doing lol I just let it slide most of the time.

@TheEmolano

Жыл бұрын

Even if you're not married, having a stable union for that long means she has all the rights she would have in a normal marriage.

@demisemedia

Жыл бұрын

Common law?

Its a fact most marriages are jokes.

People are not staying married because people are self-absorbed. How can a relationship work if you are not laying down your pride? You both do and both have to be humble enough to lay down little things for the betterment of each other. People don't want to sacrifice because they're choosing themselves more than protecting the relationship.

@afreen5058

Жыл бұрын

TRUTH lol

@Smarty2able

Жыл бұрын

@@afreen5058 it's just sad and their kids feel like it's their fault. The children become addicted and have mental health issues. Marriage is not a decision you're making for yourself, it's for future family. America has lost that value because of female empowerment and this "love your self" mantra. Give me a break. I'm tired of the battle of the sexes as grown adults of it's his fault and her fault. Everyone needs to grow up.

@Smarty2able

Жыл бұрын

@@Katm944 I don't think what you said correlates with my comment at all. I'm confused. I just said marriage doesn't work for some because people are selfish and impatient. You choose to marry, you made the vows, you make it work.

I am married, been together for 26 years and don't regret it. But marriage isn't something I would recommend. That may sound strange.

@kill3rclown690

Жыл бұрын

Ik exactly what ur talking about. Every family I've met there parents r divorced. Marriage has no benefits and it can change ur relationship and even ruin it. I do believe marriage is pointless but if someone wants it they can have it. Me and my girl we've been together for a long time and we see each other as husband and wife already and we want kids. We got each other rings!

@bigthink

Жыл бұрын

@solorsix, why wouldn't you recommend it?

@kill3rclown690

Жыл бұрын

@@bigthink it can ruin the relationship

@solorsix

Жыл бұрын

@@bigthink Many people don't understand going in that marriage is a lot of work. Give a couple decades people can change drastically. You can wake up one day and find that you are stuck. Stuck with a binding contract that could be very painful to escape. Like the cure is worse than disease type of painful in some cases.

@hannan2619

Жыл бұрын

​@@solorsixi get what you are trying to say. Like the responsibilities it comes with, hinders the freedom or individuality. But i think it all boils down to how good of a significant other you have. Its a HIGHLY important decision of your life afterall and you have to be extremely wise in choosing your partner. A good partner can be a source of comfirt and ease in your life. They can promote the individuality in you. They can grow you.

Most people I know are marrying later in life. I am also in this category as I am 39 years old. I did not think I was financially nor emotionally ready to marry when I was first asked 10 years ago by the person I am still with today. Hell, I did not even think we would have lasted this long when taking a look back. However, we have now grown together and know more about our own likes, dislikes, needs and wants and have the ability to exercise patience with each other as well as the ability to compromise before being asked to do so because we know each other so well. I feel that when we do wed, we will not be going into it with unrealistic expectations of the other person because we already know each other; not getting to know each other, then figuring out this is not going to work!

Marriage is not necessary in today's world, but people still aspire to get married. Living with someone 24/7 for years is *not* easy. Moreover, the psychological affects of living in a real-time digitally connected world is really taking a toll on people in our time, causing them to become more stressed and further complicating marriage.