If the cathedral you pray in isn't physically capable of walking towards heretics to give them the Emprah's peace personally, are you really in a Great Power?

@keen8549

Жыл бұрын

You talking about the Emperor or the Da Emprah?

@dottietyre9062

Жыл бұрын

"They drop churches INTO battle." -Bricky

@tunasandwich8049

Жыл бұрын

​@@keen8549some greenskin speech

@lokensicarius9347

Жыл бұрын

Funny you say that since Gargants are representation of gork an mork, they know what's up thats's why they're frenemys.

@Pcr12

Жыл бұрын

That church wasn't walking. It was straight up flying!

To the Tau, it was the hardest fight they've ever had. *To the Imperium, it was another day in the Guard.*

There was too much peace at the time, so we may have diverted funds and forces to help jumpstart violence with the Tau again…

@Briselance

Жыл бұрын

Too much peace?? Stop this trouble-stirring, Omegon!!

@sermer6659

Жыл бұрын

Alpharius is Sundowner indeed.

@alpharius5636

Жыл бұрын

And now, there is too much war, so we awakened the Lion from his nap.

@dragonstrike406

Жыл бұрын

Thank you. Carry on Alpharius.

@AnikaJarlsdottr

Жыл бұрын

Damacles Gulf Crusade in a nut shell. "things are too quiet, lets go kick some blue people to death for sport"

MandaloreGaming described the premise of Warhammer 40k perfectly: "Hulk Hogan is in a church, fighting the Devil. Hogan's also wearing 50 trucks worth of metal, while the church is the size of Long Island and in space"

@geraldapollyon655

5 ай бұрын

Which video is that from? Because that is gold!

@TheMC1102

5 ай бұрын

@@geraldapollyon655 It's from his Fire Warrior review, if I recall.

This seems accurate enough. No complaints. 10/10 would field firstborn again

@alvarodiazrodriguez2603

Жыл бұрын

You only ever have one firstborn, though.

@Floofrer

Жыл бұрын

Probably firstborn from each women?

@Yormolch

Жыл бұрын

I like how this can both be read as fielding vostroyans, an army without model support and low tier rules AND fielding Firstborn space Marines, a unit type, that doesn't even make up half a codex anymore and is slowly being removed from the game, JUST because both look so much more bombastic than the new guys.

@aliteraldude7658

5 ай бұрын

Could be Vostroyan Firstborn they're made up of every firstborn child from the planet Vostroya ever since the Heresy

@malickmeziani_FreePalestine

5 ай бұрын

@@YormolchGW sh*tty politics since 7th edition in a nutshell

He has a point

@rminkof

Жыл бұрын

Also millennia of resource gathering & weird retrotech discovery

@theotv5522

Жыл бұрын

Tau gangsta until they realise those churches in the distance is moving towards them

@IxGxNxI

Жыл бұрын

@@theotv5522 Tau Navy - so the empire has walking churches? That's nice to know. We can always use some target practice.

@thydzz2180

Жыл бұрын

@@IxGxNxI If you really need to bring space ships to a Titan fight, you need some better super heavy ground units

@IxGxNxI

Жыл бұрын

@@thydzz2180 Why invest in superheavy ground units when you have spaceships?

"Not enough gold. Not enough skulls. Cringe" - the words that marked the initiaton of the Damocles Crusade

If your mechs aren’t mountain sized walking cathedrals with warhorns and enough firepower to glass a continent, you’re doing warfare wrong.

@juancr4713

Жыл бұрын

And the shields that teleport projectiles to the warp?

@joshuasepeda3289

5 ай бұрын

I can't find fault with that logic.

To be fair, the Tau aren't exactly slacking in that department either. ...just its kinda hard to compete with the space gothic amalgamation that is whatever the hell the Imperium is on.

@kingskelett6265

8 ай бұрын

Gothic churches have some of the best drip imo. They are literally "how extra can we get when making a church?" ^^

@midgetydeath

23 күн бұрын

Yeah...until you actually compare the mechs and realize Imperial mechs are both vastly more powerful and far, far larger. Though, the design of titans and knights varies between planets, with some producing them as several kilometers tall. There's also classes of Imperial titan referenced that are the size of cities. As in literally have cities on top of them.

Remember when the Tau fought against the Imperium for the first time? 19 Imperial guard regiment, 1 (one) [singular] Titan Legion, 8 Space Marine chapters deployed it fight them, overall a small Imperial force. And the Tau thought that it was humanity's entire army? Fucking hilarious

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

Remember when that crusade force lost two thirds of it's fleet, and actually entered DIPLOMACY with the Tau, to arrange safe withdrawal and retreat without threat of pursuit? Far as my understanding of Imperial Crusades goes, I don't think that's supposed to happen, nor is what you'd describe as a victory. Imperium fanboys celebrate the Damocles Crusade a truly bizarre amount, considering it was one of the Imperium's biggest military embarrassments, that achieved zero of it's goals.

@jameshailerthepostmaster4389

Жыл бұрын

@@UnknownSquid the crusade ended because there was a bigger threat than the Tau.

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

@@jameshailerthepostmaster4389 That's the routine copium response, and not correct to the lore. Crusade Leadership was already in the process of actively evacuating it's forces from Dal'yth, well before the order from Inquisitor Kryptman arrived. There were even some that advocated turning back _before_ the invasion of Dal'yth, recognising that they had underestimated their enemy. The Crusade ended because it had ground to a halt under substantial losses, and was unable to take the first actual sept world it encountered. Their forces were insufficient, and their fleet weakened to the point that it could no longer protect it's transports. The emergence of the Tyranid only further confirmed decisions that had already been made. And again. The Crusade specifically negotiated a diplomatic ceasefire to allow for their safe retreat. That's not something done when in a dominant position. Especially not by the Imperium. You can look this up. It's all there.

@user-te2oc6qi9z

Жыл бұрын

​@@UnknownSquid The only reason the Imperium lost was because if they won, the Tau would be irrelevant. GW gonna keep them around for the people who can't separate fiction from reality afterall.

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

@@user-te2oc6qi9z That's such a meaningless statement. It's like saying only reason Chaos hasn't won is because the Imperium would become irrelevant. The only reason the Nids haven't eaten everything is because... The only reason the Necrons haven't retaken the galaxy yet... etc etc. The Imperium lost because it underestimated it's foe, and blundered in expecting an easy fight. Simple as that. You don't get to head-cannon your own lore of which forces are formidable or not based solely on whether you think they're cool or not.

WELCOME TO THE IMPERIUM WE GOT BLOOD AND GAMES

@stevenbyford5615

Жыл бұрын

WE GOT EVERYTHING YOU WANT HONEY WE KNOW THE NAME

@cjthebeesknees

Жыл бұрын

Praise the throne, holy terra vivaciously approves.

@redclayscholar620

Жыл бұрын

BOW DOWN TO YOUR NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA KNEES KNEES OOH AH WE'RE GONNA MAKE YOU BLEED

@AnimeSunglasses

3 ай бұрын

​@@stevenbyford5615 (though we may have forgotten it after the Administratum misfiled it somewhere)

"Pey'ter. The church is walking." -Loi'es to Pey'ter durring their first encounter with a so-called propaganda titan.

@OljeiKhan

Жыл бұрын

"HEY" said the propaganda plasma cannon, "LMAO"

@nobody4248

Жыл бұрын

Builds anti-titan artillery for a fraction of the price of a full titan

@Jeff-zf6zz

Жыл бұрын

​@@nobody4248 Realized that they FUCKING VOID SHIELDS. THAT THE TAU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW EXISTED.

@jamescawl6904

Жыл бұрын

​@@Jeff-zf6zza hell powered shield. Now a 2 Demi-God brothers returned to lead the galaxy spanning Imperium.

@marcearlsantos9027

Жыл бұрын

@@nobody4248 An "Anti-titan weapon" cost less than an "Anti-everything weapon." Are you serious?

- Thank you, thank you! Tau have freed us! - Oh, I wouldn't say freed... More like "under Greater Good"

@noobplaye1218

Жыл бұрын

Lets be real tau is the most sanest of the bunch

@00yiggdrasill00

Жыл бұрын

​@@noobplaye1218you shouldn't mistake gross naivety for sanity. The others are very sane they just have a better understanding of the galaxy and what it takes to survive in it.

@Crispifordthe3rd515

Жыл бұрын

​@@00yiggdrasill00 I smell neck beard.

@chubbyninja89

Жыл бұрын

@@Crispifordthe3rd515 Well, he does make a good point. The Tau are pretty unaware of just how horrible the galaxy they live in really is.

@00yiggdrasill00

Жыл бұрын

@@Crispifordthe3rd515 then may I suggest you go take a shower?

*GIANT WALKING CATHEDRALS ARE REAL!* -A surviving T'au to his Superiors.

@PikachuLittle

Жыл бұрын

“Shit! Duct tape that starship grade gun to that hypersonic bomber!” -Random Tau Earth Caste “Huh… that was disgustingly easy” -Cadre Command after they popped the cathedral like a watermelon

@ivanmayorov5252

Жыл бұрын

​@@PikachuLittle *smoke clears from the cathedral, unscathed* *Tau officers are left in awe:* "They have CRUISER/BATTLESHIP RANK VOID SHIELDS on those???" Read the lore nerd, Titans except Knights always have space grade void shields which can't be breached by 1 shot

@PikachuLittle

Жыл бұрын

@@ivanmayorov5252 *Titan spontaneously explodes anime style because canonically a Tiger Shark AX-1-0 popped a Warhound on its first sortie and the Mechanicus were terrified of redeploying afterwards* YOU read the lore. AX-1-0s knock out the shields with a missile barrage then pops the bitch with a heavy Railgun.

@user-ro9zf9kz1h

Жыл бұрын

​@@PikachuLittlewell that is the smallest one.(it's like 10m tall) The one that is referred as walking church is the imperator titan which is much much taller and stronger than the warhound. Also fun fact. Imperial guard also have anti titan weapon which is basically a titan weapon mounted on a baneblade(like the shadow sword)

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

​@@ivanmayorov5252Cadre Command: "Okay, so the Razorsharks weren't super effective. Call in the Manta wing" Later... "Well that was easy" There's a reason the Imperium updated its strategy with Titans when around T'au: don't use them if T'au still have flyers.

Tau: we've have 10.000 fire warriors with rail guns, what do you got Human empire: 10.000.000 guardsmen, a chapter of marines and a giant mech with a church on its top Tau: chill man, this planet is just desert after all...

@RahmpageChicken

Жыл бұрын

"'just' desert? i don't know, i also see quite a few xenos, heretics and blasphemers to liquidate."

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

The guard honestly tend to fare better in conflict against the Tau. They take fewer losses in those conflicts than they do vs most other foes of the Imperium, and their numbers are effective in pressuring Tau tactics. The same actually can't be said for the Astartes and Knight/Titan legions, which tend to suffer far more losses than other conflicts of equivalent importance.

@DominatorLegend

Жыл бұрын

Didn't the Tau win the Taros campaign?

@therealgeneralMacArthur

Жыл бұрын

​@@UnknownSquid damn, its almost like big angry men in very visible armor who really like using chainsaws and assult rifles don't do very well against long range bombardment, what a thought?

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

@@therealgeneralMacArthur The existence of the pulse rifle doesn't help either. Std issue rifle that penetrates Astartes plate. If 40k were based in combat realism rather than rule of cool, it would basically be the invention of gunpowder vs armoured knights. Space Marines would simply become obsolete. Have you ever seen the 40k mods for Arma 3? A military simulator game. Both the Tau and the Skiitari were so overpowered due to their long range armour piercing weaponry, the mod designers have had to bend over backwards with nerfs and buffs to try and make the combat remotely resemble the regular feel of 40k combat. They had to give space marines with things like thunder hammers a hilarious AoE kill bubble on every strike, and run around at downright comical speeds to make them actually competitive.

Lol the tau claiming to be a great power when they don't even have mobile war cathedrals.

'Oh yeah, what's the difference?' Well, owning more than five star systems for a start.

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

Good thing the T'au own well over two hundred at this point, and probably more.

@Magnusthered18

Жыл бұрын

​@SarajevoKyoto still small, just ultramar has that Amount of systems

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

@@Magnusthered18 Yes, but considering Ultramar is the current center of military innovation for the whole Imperium, I think it speaks highly of the T'au

@janehrahan5116

11 ай бұрын

@@Magnusthered18 lore fail, ultamar is 500 systems.

@janehrahan5116

11 ай бұрын

@@SarajevoKyoto ? The primaris, whether we like them or not, are terran invention, an entirely different segmentum.

To most who don't know any better you'd think the tau were a legitimate adversary to the imperium on some level. Advanced super quickly, gained control of just over a 100 planets in a few hundred years, but then you'd remember that within the same span of time big E took over a million, hell Guilliman took 500 in five years, Macharius a base human 1000 in 7yrs xD

@robbiecommie4941

Жыл бұрын

I mean probably cuz they don't have warp travel or any ftl capability (to my knowledge) but their technology development rate is insane for going from stone age to extremely advanced in like 3500 years I think

@zachburskey8868

Жыл бұрын

@@robbiecommie4941 Yeah but they're pretty dumb about chaos and naive about xenos. They did make a deal with dark eldar. DARK ELDAR.

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

Well the state of the Imperium when big E was still in charge, vs how it is now, is like comparing the United States military to like... Madagascar, or something. And the event coinciding with Guilliman waking up to RE-take those 500 worlds, was the Imperium being cut in half by the eye of terror belching out from the fall of Cadia, and losing contact with tens of thousands of worlds. Obviously the Imperium is still the big shot in town, and especially with Gulliman in charge now it might stand a chance of recovering from it's 10'000 years of rot. But it's pretty plain that the Tau are indeed a legitimate adversary. Not on scale for scale terms, since if it were a straight 1v1 we all know what would happen. But in actual consistent practice, within the lore, the Tau have been steadily pushing on the Imperium not the other way around, and have over quadrupled the size of their empire whilst the Imperium continues to shrink.

@Bernoris

Жыл бұрын

100 planets in few hundred years? That's still below what the UNSC had accomplished and they are thousands of years behind technologically

@kabob0077

Жыл бұрын

​@@BernorisThey also have a consistent FTL drive that doesn't involve taking a hop, skip, and a jump through Hell.

0:30 Oh-gohohohoho. I love that titan horn.

With Warhammer 40k the way it is. Im pretty sure this actually happened somewhere in the galaxy. Also, I'd love to hear a Titan playing Welcome to the Jungle as it's war horn! It's so cool!

The Shas'o, later that day: "Yes, hi, can I get like three dozen flags, banners and standarts? Why? For the GREATER GOOD, thats WHY!"

Like to point out how understrength the imperial response to the Tau was initially. It was barely a vanguard of a reclamation crusade, and it wasn't even defeated by the Tau, it had to withdraw due to the Nids. An real crusade would likely just thought that the Tau empire was dip in road, even a speedbump.

The only thing keeping the tau safe from the imperiums full might, is the forces engaging the imperium on all sides. Scale-wise, the advantage is with the imperium.

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

Possibly. Then again, look at how Vietnam or Afghanistan ended up. Granted, Afghanistan comes down to cowardice and possibly treason from the sitting US President, but the fact remains that a small, supposedly defenseless power fought off one of the biggest dogs on the block, and T'au tech is rapidly outpacing anything Mars or Ultramar can come up with these days.

@Southern_Crusader

6 ай бұрын

The Tau is like that squeaky door hinge you say you’ll get too after you stop the rest of the house from falling apart. They are on the list of things to unfuck but with how things are it’s basically out of pity to even consider it at this point.

@joshuasepeda3289

5 ай бұрын

The Tau still exist because none of the other factions can rally the forces to purge them. The Imperium is fighting on all sides, Chaos doesn't see them as a meal due to their lack of warp sensitivity, and I think the Orks are still too divided to muster the force necessary. I have read that the Tyranids just don't see the Tau as worth the effort to assimilate when the Imperium and the Orks are much better targets. As for the Necrons, most of them just stay sleeping in their tombs. They don't really bother to do anything unless provoked. The Eldar are probably the only race that doesn't have the real strength needed to destroy them. The Dark eldar can harass them, but they most likely lack the numbers to do anything major. That last part is just my opinion.

You may have Gundam armor but we have mountain sized knight armor

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

We have a plane built specifically to hunt mountain sized armored things.

I am 80% sure the only two reasons titans are still in use are psychological warfare and walking mechanicus pornography.

@PikachuLittle

10 ай бұрын

Also Sunk Cost Fallacy. Those things are so expensive that we can’t *not* use them

*kicks a warship at him*

@Solo_man69

Жыл бұрын

Sanguinor shows sup and splits it into 2

@ethanjeffries7914

Жыл бұрын

​@Solo The Man forget to change accounts?

@Solo_man69

Жыл бұрын

No I just wanted to add on

Vostroyan's be like 😂

Guardsmen be like Who we gonna fight today?, The Tau? Oh Thank the Emperor!

When you bring a weaponized cathedral to a gunfight.

0:30 That warsound of the Titan Knight was epic

Welcome to Catachan we got grim and dark we got everything you want Honey we got the bugs

@ashmoleproductions5407

Жыл бұрын

The tyranids once attempted to invade Catachan. The local wildlife ate them. They to my knowledge did not attempt again.

@then00brathalos

Жыл бұрын

@@ashmoleproductions5407 ironic since i would argue about 75% of catachan hazards come from tyranids that detached from the hive mind

Ah yes the Tau, that race that would stop existing in a matter of months if Humanity didn't bigger fish to fry.

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

"I would totally beat you! If only I weren't desperately fighting for my life in a slowly loosing battle for the past 10'000 years!" A rotting whale could crush anything if only it could roll over. If only it could...

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

@Fighter Slade Well, "last legs" would be an over statement. They're a total shadow of their former glory, but the Imperium is still utterly massive. But otherwise... "theoretically" yes. But emphasis on theoretically, and mainly in the sense that the Tau are limited only by resources and manpower, which they are gradually accumulating. Whilst the Imperium is limited by bad logistics and inability to actually produce their best equipment (which is a huge deal). IF the Tau ever grew to the point where they could aggressively produce large quantities of their best units, it would only be a matter of time before the Imperium started running out of titans, gene-seed and other scarce non-replaceable relics. But that's a huge IF, and would take millennia to happen. In which time, who knows what could happen to change things. Despite it's atrocious losses to chaos in recent lore, the Imperium does now have Guliman leading it. And if he can shake some of the rust off enough of the Imperium, that's more powerful than a million worlds of stagnant primitives. The Realm of Ultramar is the closest thing to a proper modern society in the Imperium. A rare place actually showing how the Imperium could actually function and even be an at least half decent place to live, if it got it's act together. So nothing can be really said to be "destined".

Warp travel, psykers, Mechs the size of mountains, genetically enhanced super soliders, demi-god leaders....

The cathedral flying in, in the background, with all of the titans sounding off their horns. What could make it better... ...Welcome To the Jungle of course.

The Tau may have the stylized streamlined look of science fiction, but their style is nothing compared to the poster boys of grim dark science fiction/fantasy

Imperator Titans, Gloriana Battleships, the Imperium has some major drip

I would also like to welcome all the new subscribers that've come to the channel in the last couple of weeks! Thank you all so much for your support and helpful critiques! Here's to more videos!

That titan warhorn gives me shivers every time. Purge the xenos!

Gotta love the Hydratan Fusiliers. This is now a threeway fight boys.

@AnonD38

5 ай бұрын

*The XXth Hydratan Fusiliers (I love the Legionnaire in the Knight)

Really good DoW Tau impression

Brave words uttered by the Tau, not backed by strength.

If the walking death church isn't on my side, I'm on the wrong side.

*_"P R E S E N T A T I O N !"_* _sirens blare as thousands of tau firewarriors are obilterated by giant robo-knight mechs and walking churches._ Edit: Being real tho, if anyone was to be in the 40K universe fighting against the Tau, you'd one of the millions of Astra Militarum that gets their head or body blasted by a Tau railgun long before you even get to their front lines. I know I would.

*IF ITZ PRESENTATION YOUZ LOOKIN FOAH DEN DA ORKZ IZ DA GREATIST POWER IN DA UNI-VURS!*

@UnknownSquid

Жыл бұрын

Damn orkz just barging into everything uninvited. ( I respect it tho.)

As a Tau player, Accurate. A glorified buffer-state. Our claim to fame is the Tau didn't die when the Imperial took its first swing (more of a swat really), which very few non-great powers can say.

@SarajevoKyoto

Жыл бұрын

As another T'au player, not entirely accurate. Any Crusade that includes multiple SM detachments and Titans can't be called anything but an honest swing. And we utterly broke them so badly they negotiated for peaceful passage off-world and set fires in SPACE to cover their retreat. T'au Prime is currently the most well-defended planet anywhere outside of the Sol System or wherever the Necron HQ is, and we're engineering solutions to Tyranids, Orks, and the Warp itself. Give us a few more centuries and we'll be running the joint basically unopposed, just like the British Empire we're sorta-kinda-but-not-really a pastiche of.

@PikachuLittle

11 ай бұрын

@@SarajevoKyoto bit of an overstatement, it’ll probably take the Tau a couple millennia to reach “capable of seriously fighting the Imperium beyond border skirmishes”. But the fact remains that the oft touted “resounding Imperial victory” that was the Damocles Gulf Crusade amounted to bombing two freshly colonized frontier worlds from orbit and utterly failing to take one city on the first planet that put up actual resistance.

@averylazytechpriest2346

5 ай бұрын

​@@SarajevoKyotoand we both know, deep down, they won't. The imperium will always be the big faction of 40k because gw will deem it so. Tau will be lucky to get 1 new thing happen per edition. Sucks to suck xenos.

@letendreelliott8778

5 ай бұрын

@@averylazytechpriest2346wdym? All factions get equal amounts of stuff! Imperium, Space Marines, Chaos and Xenos. The four big factions of the 40k setting

"Oh yeah? What;s the difference?" "ALPHARIUS"

"Knock knock heretics" 😀

@vermiworm

Жыл бұрын

The rocket cathedral immediately got me xD

Truly a certified Megamind moment. What if God Emperor is the Metroman? xD

That honestly just fits 40k as a whole over the top bullshit 24/7 and I love it.

@prestonjones1653

9 ай бұрын

Of everything is stupidly overpowered, nothing is!

NGL, the titan’s warhorn made me choke on my soup.

I think this is accurate to *literally any race except tau* vs tau

The Imperium: daily civil wars, uprisings, and 4 Tyranid invasions. “Just another day in the Guard” The Tau after encountering the Tyranids: Stop the colonization plan! We need everyone to come defend this backwater planet!

The Tau's face when they found out the titans were real was priceless. Not to mention the look when the sisters of battle drop an entire cathedral fortress from orbit which might I add has got to be one of the biggest flexes in the warhammer 40k.

@carolingio1152

6 ай бұрын

I want that excerpt of sisters of battle deploying a cathedral from orbit in front of the T'au

@helline9

5 ай бұрын

in 40k if you don't go to church the church goes to you!

I feel like " there isn't room for two great empires " would have worked better

Sho'Aun: "Drone... BREAK OUT THE TAUNAR" _Guile's theme starts playing_

@velstadtvonausterlitz2338

Жыл бұрын

**gets stepped on by a warlord** the what?

@DominatorLegend

Жыл бұрын

@@velstadtvonausterlitz2338 You forget the Taunar is deployed miles away from the battlefield and can one-shot Imperators. There's a reason the Mechanicus forbids titan deployment against the Tau nowadays.

Fuckin love the Imperium

Do you take requests? because there is one emwhatnot comic I've always wanted to see dubbed. The one about Farsight.

@123_JMP

Жыл бұрын

Hell yeah man

@enderknight39

Жыл бұрын

Aun'ey, where is my crisis suit?

@Jack-0-lantern

Жыл бұрын

@@enderknight39 yes

So I fully expected him to say "Extermination!" While exterminatous'ing them.

How it feels to play newbies as ORKZ:

I'm a bit late, hope you see this: A robber goes into a store, shoot the lasgun at the roof and yells out "Everyone, hands up, this is a rob-" he looks more closely, there's a Salamander in full battle gear, helping an old lady with her groceries, while holding a baby on his other hand... Looking at him. the music part of "and he looks at me, and I look at him, and he looks at me, AND I LOOK AT HIM" plays while it changes between the two of them, every panel with the robber he is more and more scared and every Salamander panel has the Salamander's eyes glowing redder and brighter everytime.

In time i think this channel will blow up due to its subtle yet amezing spund effect

*The year M30, in the Alternate Universe where the Men of Iron never rebelled.* Necrons: This galaxy belongs to us once more. Humanity: Oh maybe once. But NOT anymore. Necrons: Oh? And why is that, primitive? Humanity: TECHNOLOGY! *Teleports tomb worlds into black holes* *Fires bullets that disintegrates enemies' molecules instantly* *Deploys Ai that rival Imotekh* *Uses ships with the ability to travel through time and space at will* *Uses ships that can reflect shots from the World Engine back into it* *Copies and surpasses living metal tech* *Blows up necron dyson spheres with bombs that delete them from any point in time* *Infects entire armies with the Flayer Virus* *Breaks into necron tesseract vaults* *Deploys titans that can reflect aeonic orb shots back into it* *Mass produces pylons that nullify the Celestial Orrery*

Presentation? Sounds like Slaanesh worship

Tau “weaponry”: machines built with every practical use to ensure victory at the cost of minimum tau lives Imperial machines of war blessed by the Emperor and Omnesaiah themselves: fuck you heres a church used as a drop pod and our elite soldiers have books and parchment waxed to their armor

The Alpharius knight lmao

Having a friend who spent a lot of time making up his Tau army despite the harsh prices in SEA,I can confidentally say that no matter how the status quo is in the 40k timeline,the actual tactical scenario for players who aren't running a lot of ranged units in return is a bloody slaughter as the Tau shoot them from accross the map,so much so that he too became one of many Tau players that can rarely find anyone to fight against. And that was before Corona-chan made it so much more worse.

@sydorovich2532

Жыл бұрын

A pretty realistic scenario in most situations unless the battleground is too close quarter focused(spaceships/hive cities) or enemy has insane mobility features like teleportation to lend right on top of distance-based army.

@NareshSinghOctagon

Жыл бұрын

@@sydorovich2532 ,yup.

@jamescawl6904

Жыл бұрын

​@@NareshSinghOctagonTau do suck against numbers and melee though. Just take a equivalent guard force on points with earthshaker support and just dot what the japanese did against the USA in WW2. But this time there are more guard units than the entire tau population.

@NareshSinghOctagon

Жыл бұрын

@@jamescawl6904 ,having seen him play a few times,the closest to a defeat was when his buddy used some sort of motorcycle unit to go after the objective,otherwise,none of the massed melee actually got close enough. As for the lore itself,the Tau are manufacturing heavier weapons,so it's only a matter of time ramping things up.

@jamescawl6904

Жыл бұрын

@@NareshSinghOctagon Then the only option left is total exterminatus. Just send a battlefleet to burn all Tau worlds. The Tau navy is still a lot more weaker technologically and in numbers against the Imperial navy.

I’ve seen this meme a few time now, but this is by far the best.

I love the Tau learning just how fucking batshit their universe is. But to be fair, they get burned and then they learn. They tried diplomacy with orkz, then they learnt to exterminate them. They thought titans were just propaganda, then they developed titan killing superweapons. This would be the place for a third example, and there definitely is one, but I forgot so the Tau learnt to remember their own examples.

@pascalheinrich3990

Жыл бұрын

What about a deal with the Dark Eldar for a cultural exchange only to get their emissarys get turned in abominations

@miniverse2002

Жыл бұрын

It's interesting because if they survive long enough to grow out of their naivete like the imperium did, they wouldn't have as much of the baggage.

@megan00b8

Жыл бұрын

@@pascalheinrich3990 Yeah, that's a good third example.

love the sound of brhhhhhhhhhh titan in the background ahahaha

History remembers those wirh the most buttons on their coats. Or something. I don't know, I haven't been around Generals

Damn the cane being made from 100% nalwood is going to be expensive AF

Now can't get the image of megamind as emperor out of my head^^

After the Tau were introduced to the setting, it became a bag of flaming shit and nobody can tell me otherwise.

"The XXth Hydran Fusiliers" Yep, that seems completely legit.

The imperial in charge of the music knew what they were doing.

* drops a church on you *

more lik: What's the dif- why dat church movin'?

“They can’t even fight in melee!”

AS SOON as I heard that music; Megamind came to mind; no pun intended.

Everything is fun and games till the churches start walking.

Truthfully, the imperium wasn't even looking for the Tau when they sent the fleet that would end up fighting in that "crusade". They only wanted to find out why certain human worlds, that they found out bordered Tau space, had stopped paying taxes. The Imperium only discovered the Tau after arriving at the first rebellious world. Also, the fleet could have just used orbital bombardment to crush the Tau worlds every time they came across one. However, the fleet commander actually had a sense of honor and refused to do this when an inquisitor suggested the idea. If the Tyranids hadn't shown up when they did, reinforcements most likely would have been called up, and the Tau would have been exterminated. I'll have to check again, but i believe the imperial fleet sent on this expedition had a dozen ships, half a million guardsmen, and five hundred space marines. The imperium wasn't expecting to find any real resistance, just a few upstart vassal worlds that needed "persuading" to resume their tax paying. Ok, i just checked on the fleet size. I can't find an estimate on how many guardsmen were in that crusade, just that there were 19 regiments. I am correct about the rest of the fleet size, however.

“Uh sir, does that cathedral seem to be getting closer?”

I mean, he's not wrong.

the tau are the ultimate example of a success. Standing up to a hostile menace far greater than itself so well.

@capitanmexico4422

Жыл бұрын

No, success would be beating them

@Hys-01

Жыл бұрын

they did beat them. They managed to win against the imperium on several occasions, when even a single battle could be considered 'beating' the imperium. Given how much more advanced the imperium is.

What's the point of having a church if it cannot curb stomp the heretics

Would be better if his cane was also a gun.

Ah, the best dub yet, here have a sub!

"Presentation" impossibly loud warhorn blast

If you can't drown the enemies in enough bodies to populate 3 systems as your first wave are you really a great power?

the Geneva Conventions, they only apply to humans -the emperor of man (citation needed)

@clementpetillot9383

Жыл бұрын

Do we have to respect it when we don't have the slightest idea were Geneva is ?

Ever wanna see a Tau player throw a temper tantrum and quit? Turn one their Hammerhead with the Rupture Cannon from a Tyranofex. All the sudden they dont really like big units being shot off the board. Lol.

I like this. Thank you

I love the fact that they used a Megamind template for this

The church walks Tau: "laughs in tigershark bombarder"

@justwannabehappy6735

Жыл бұрын

It amuses me how people always forget the Tau also had models released by FW.

@peterandreas8387

Жыл бұрын

"laughs in imperial battle cruiser in planet atmosphere"

@SeventhSeraphOfficerRevolver

Жыл бұрын

​@@peterandreas8387laughs in kroot warsphere

@skitariiranger4346

Жыл бұрын

​@@SeventhSeraphOfficerRevolver *laughs in actual FTL travel*

This made my day.

the algorithm has blessed me

Tau: *Shoots a railgun through 3 emperor class titans at once* Imperial: COME ON THATS BULLSHIT! YOU CANT EVEN MELEE

The chapel at 0:35 says... "Knock Knock Heretics..."

G1 Shockwave is in for it 💀

War hammer with Gun&Rose welcome to the jungle on it