I view getting a GF as an accidental byproduct of just living a good life. Cultivate yourself along every dimension of your humanity--physical, mental, and spiritual health--use your God-given creative talents, always be learning, love your neighbor, etc.. Seems dumb to try to "game" the system because then you're just frauding, you'll be constantly trying to prove yourself to others, and you'll be insecure because you won't know if the other person would really like the true you.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

💯

@herlocksholmes9369

Жыл бұрын

Yes, exactly! I only just realised this a few years ago. I realised that the reason I hadn't found a wife yet, was simply because God wanted me to grow in virtue first. So that's what I'm trying to do now.

@NoName-zb1gm

10 ай бұрын

This is good advice but there are low morals women everywhere even at Church or if you're trying to live a good life helping other people or Catholic dating sites. I wish I knew where women with high morals were at. Probably at home like me trying to avoid all the toxic energy in the world.

@serga7486

3 ай бұрын

Yeah the thing is you dont have to hit an extremely highbar in self actualization to have a relationship or maintain it

When I was looking for a girlfriend, I couldn‘t get one at all. As soon as I started looking for a wife, that is when God allowed her into my life.

Happy Valentines Day Elisabeth! God bless you! ❤🌹

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Happy Valentines Day!

You basically summed up all my thoughts on dating in one video, nice 👍

Great talk biblical bookworm. I like your bookshelf

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Thank you 😊🤓

"If you are someone who shaves with a patch here... you are someone who prays their Rosary with 8 Hail Mary's per decade." As someone who is a lazy shaver I am personally offended.

@BiblicalBookworm

11 ай бұрын

😂

@Kaihku

10 ай бұрын

Lazy shaver here too. My technique: I shave fairly diligently, but only once a week or so and with the electric shaver. Luckily my wife likes beard and she asks me not to shave completely LOL.

Great video Elizabeth thank you for sharing God bless you 🙏

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

God bless you too! 🙏

@pepetono72

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm Thank you Elizabeth 😀

That's true. Unfortunately I am single and clueless.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

I will pray for you and your vocation🙏

@lovral

Жыл бұрын

God has a plan for you, right now it may feel tough but just trust in him his plan is to purify you let him use your singleness for purifying you and uniting you to him.

@jjrevab1118

Жыл бұрын

You are a fan of the Pittsburgh Penguins, so that is a step in the right direction! Pursue virtue, and let life take you from there.

Hey! this was really helpful! thank you so much for the video. I got to say that Chad is very friendly and cool and you are a lovely lady. You should get more views in your channel! keep it up!

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for the kind comment! 😊🌷

We want holiness..we want bravery...we want honor...we want goodness

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Absolutely! 🙏

@Provocateur991

6 ай бұрын

And you want 6 feet with a 6 figure income

@zaviusfirerave

5 ай бұрын

No, I think you're lying. You are just saying that to make yourself look holy

@StudiesOfTheAncientNearEast

Ай бұрын

@@Provocateur991 Right, because every woman in the world is a liberal... That sure sounds like a rational and mature worldview.

@Provocateur991

Ай бұрын

@@StudiesOfTheAncientNearEast what does wanting money and height have to do with liberalism?

I have found that most tall women I've known don't make height a deal breaker. Instead, it's mostly the really short girls I've known or have tried asking out are the ones who set standards on height (i.e. tall men)

@BiblicalBookworm

2 ай бұрын

There are much more important things than height! (I'm 5'9'')

Happy Valentines Day. I learned something nine years ago on a flight to Jerusalem, German women have a very nice accent. I still think about our flight attendant. Lufthansa. ❤️

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

😂 Happy Valentines Day!

It would be great to have a foundation rooted in faith, the purpose of dating, and the road map to marriage, which is lost on many women and men. All of the 20th-century popes have written on the subject, for context. For men; I would say, work on developing the type of habits and qualities you want to attract in a spouse.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Agree!

I don't have a girlfriend yet because I'm in the process of buying a car lol! So with that being said , I know God has someone special waiting for me on the other end of my path .... and So will begin a new path for my incredible adventurous life lol! 🔥🙏⚘️ love is a choice , we choose love , and I choose love 24/7 💕🧸⚘️ I'm not an obsessed romantic but my identity is found in Christ 🌟 and couples who find their identity in Christ will always know the grace of God! A wonderful Personality and a clean sense of humor is what I hope to find in my life partner if it be God's holy will that I should marry , the attraction and the chemistry happens through the natural course of time ..... Nice video! God bless! 🔥🙏⚘️

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

God bless you too! I will pray for you and your vocation🙏

Nice video. I think I’m already doing everything you’re saying but I’m still struggling with dating. Catholic women never want a second date with me and I don’t know why.

When I was younger, I spent around six years learning German, but unfortunately I haven't really used it since then, and I'm afraid I won't be able to impress any Austrian women with my German skills. But if women are allowed to do something for a whole year in order to impress a guy as well, I think Elisabeth should learn to speak Danish, because that would really impress me! By the way, I don't actually look like Mr. Toad in real life ;)

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Herlock Sholmes! Long time no see! I speak Dutch, maybe that's a satisfying substitute 😉

@herlocksholmes9369

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm Yeah, I think it was almost a year ago that I we wrote a bit here. Dutch is an impressive substitute, indeed. And I even understand it quite well when it's written - it's almost like a mix of English, German and Danish ;D

@herlocksholmes9369

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm By the way, I was wondering if you are studying at the moment, or if you have finished your studies? And if so, what do you/did you study? But I totally understand if you'd rather not tell, if you want to stay (semi)anonymous, though :)

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

@@herlocksholmes9369 I'm currently studying law

@herlocksholmes9369

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm Now, that's interesting - I don't quite know why, but I had imagined that you studied something completely different, like maybe literature, philosophy or psychology ;D But then again, a subject like law does have quite a few things in common with philosophy, I guess. I've actually studied something a bit similar to the first two subjects I mentioned, just don't want to be too specific here where everyone can read it :)

Hi Chad- I’m not on Twitter but I love listening to you speak. If you happen to have a KZread account, please let me know! Thank you

woaaw Chad is literally a king, he’s so based and handsome and clever and what great advice, I think everybody should take it!!

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

💯

Elizabeth seems to have more honest and true tips about getting a relationship than her guest has. It does help if a guy becomes really good at something that has some impact. I couldn't get a girlfriend in high school until I learned to play guitar well and started playing in rock bands. She is absolutely right about getting at least one great photo and I'd say get a pro to shoot it in a studio, not just a friend with an expensive camera. I really like that she was honest about how much looking attractive counts. Too many people want to say looks don't matter, but the truth is they count much more than most people want to admit . I still believe for the most part that some guys just have it and some guys just don't and unfortunately never will never get a mate no matter how hard they work on themselves and try to improve. Elizabeth seems to be great at discovering the real truth about things in her videos and I think she could do a series of videos that would be helpful for Catholic singles. One thing I read that seems to be true for women is that the more a gal looks like a gal instead of a guy, the better her chances of attracting men, meaning long hair instead of short hair, dresses and skirts instead of jeans and pants, and other things that signal she is a woman and not a dude. Great commentary from Elizabeth and hopes she does more on Catholic dating.

@BiblicalBookworm

3 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing! However, I don't think that I agree that some guys "will never get a mate no matter how hard they work on themselves".

So true!

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

😊

5:05 Ladies, if any of y'all are worried about this, I need to drop some news on you. Guys don't select women based on eye color. We find a girl we like and then become convinced that her eye color is the most beautiful eye color. And if we lose her and move on, then the next girlfriend's eye color is the most beautiful eye color. It's not a trait you should actually be concerned about.

I stopped taking this man seriously when he said I was even less intelligent than I think I am. The bell curve has never been to places that dark and unexplored before. God bless ❤

@BiblicalBookworm

6 ай бұрын

When did he say that?

@twopintsofmilk

6 ай бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm on the off-chance it's not coming across that way in text, I was joking. He's said somewhere close to the start of the video that people aren't as smart as they think they are. I made a joke at my own expense.

Lol!!! Id like to see how this plays out in Los Angeles.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

😬😁

I have a different perspective on some of these topics which I’d like to share. Maybe the perceived difference is not a true difference. A sense of humor (which Chad claims to be the most important component), a skill, a genuine interest, being well-kept, having a steady job, etc seem to be mere symbols which point towards deeper characteristics which we use to assess men or women. Certainly, women (and men, for that matter) are inherently different, and their preferences cannot be grouped into a “formula.” There is no “formula” and thank God that there is not only one set of characteristics which the sexes find attractive. In my experience, the deeper characteristics which men and women seem to desire in a partner are trustworthiness, commitment, integrity, thoughtfulness, self-directed-ness, etc. These characteristics seem to be more universally desired and we must use inductive reasoning - from the more shallow characteristics, up - to assess a person’s deeper attributes. I believe that the anxiety many feel to find a partner leads them down a path of constructing formulas in their mind to reduce the uncertainty which comes from the utter vulnerability of dating and - later on - romantic love. From a Christian perspective, we are much greater than our characteristics. There is something much deeper and more profound, something beyond words, which make up the human person than mere attributes. The opposite sex , and all people, is/are not a mere puzzle to be solved, but an entity to be experienced. Christianity’s claim is that we come to know ourselves as we come to know God. In the act of coming to know God, we are transformed. This transformation is a public change because the characteristics which arise from it can be seen and witnessed. To move it a step forward, the virtues are acted out and the outside world noticed. These acts and attributes point towards a transformed heart and those that are on a similar journey notice it. It is on this path, in my opinion, that one is most likely to develop a meaningful relationship. The obsession with possessing certain characteristics - especially shallow ones and also the desire to possess virtue as a mere instrument to attract a woman - comes across as inauthentic, untrustworthy, and ungrounded. I believe this is what many women are referring to when they mention “a lack of confidence” being unattractive in men. One last note: Attractiveness is the hardest topic of all because it has such a powerful grasp. I have not figured out how to square physical attractiveness into this view. But, from my experiences, someone becomes more beautiful the more you come to know them, and everyone possesses inherent beauty. I hope none of this makes the impression that I believe I have this figured out. I certainly do not. I’m a 24 year old who has a lot to learn. This is just my perspective from my life, dating, and paying attention to these matters.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing your perspective! Beautifully written btw 🙃 The difference might indeed be only perceived and not a true difference: regarding the "deeper characteristics which men and women seem to desire in a partner": aren't trustworthiness, commitment, integrity, thoughtfulness and self-directed-ness characteristics that we tend to look for in friends in general? They are certainly universally desired - but for almost every sort of relationship, even a business relationship. You are also definetely right saying that "someone becomes more beautiful the more you come to know them". As Chad once tweeted: women trick themselves into thinking that a guy is physically attractive when they are attracted to a guy bc of his personality etc. When it comes to squaring physical attractiveness into all of this, what do you think of this idea: physical attractiveness is what makes/can make a friendship a romantic relationship. Although I'd prefer that shallow characteristics as you describe them didn't play a role in all of this.

@garrettdyess1110

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm Thank you! I find your point to be very interesting, and I especially appreciate your critique of my perspective. Along with this, thank you for opening up a dialogue about this on your channel because it is under-discussed, in my opinion. It seems to me that you are saying that physical attractiveness + the universally desired traits lead to a romantic relationship instead of any other sort of relationship? If I am characterizing your stance correctly, I am not sure what I believe on this topic at this moment. I am not sure whether we can deduce the answer to these types of questions. For instance, say a person has an opposite sex friend who possesses all of the deeper characteristics, but they are not attracted to them. Then, due to some reason, the friend becomes more attractive (it seems that this can happen in a variety of ways). Would their perception of them, in the category of their friend being a potential partner, shift? If the answer to that question is "no" for people, it seems that there are other forces at play besides physical attractiveness + deeper characteristics. But, using another situation, if you imagine that two people have become friends via a social media platform and they deeply connect, but when they finally meet in person, one individuals finds the other individual to be un-attractive, the possibility of a relationship would - likely - cease. Maybe it is the case that physical attractiveness asserts curiosity and motivation for one person to pursue another and in this context, they get to know the other person and invites the possibility of a relationship. Ultimately, I do believe that physical attractiveness plays a major role in the possibility of relationships forming, and I wrestle with this issue. How much emphasis should we put on physical characteristics as Christians? That is the questions which plagues me. It certainly does not seem like something which we should reflexively affirm nor deny. Wealth is similar to this, in my opinion. They are questions to really wrestle with, and our immediate assumptions are often misleading. Would love to hear your thoughts on all of this!

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

You understood me correctly, yes. I see where this is going, you're actually trying to find a mathematical formula for this 😂😂 You write "Then, due to some reason, the friend becomes more attractive" and use this as an indication for another variable in my formula "physical attractiveness + deeper characteristics". The problem I see with this reasoning is that we need to define "deeper characteristics" first because in my opinion the becoming more attractive "due to some reason" boils down to either physical attractiveness or deeper characteristics. Regarding "How much emphasis should we put on physical characteristics as Christians?" I'd say that we basically can't influence how important that is for a romantic relationship, can we? Also if humans somehow managed to ignore physical attractiveness - wouldn't that result in bad/worse genetic material being passed on? 😅

@garrettdyess1110

Жыл бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm Hahaha.I am attempting to argue that it is not merely a formula. The situation I proposed was assuming that for many people, even if their friend increased in physical attractiveness, they would not flip a switch on their opinion concerning being in a romantic relationship with them. I was attempting to convey that if this is the case, then it challenges the idea that romantic relationships are merely a combination of deeper characteristics and physical attractiveness. To make this obnoxiously and humorously quantitative, say being positive for deeper characteristics is one point, and being physically attractive is positive for another point. So if 1+1 = 2, then 2 signifies the possibility of a romantic relationship. In the case where the friend possesses deeper characteristics (1) and is now physically attractive (1) we output a 2, but there is not a romantic relationship. Sorry, had to have fun with that idea for a minute lol. On the point about defining deeper characteristics. A rough draft of defining it may be the characteristics which display right accordance with true, moral values. On the point of not being able to control the affordance which attractiveness has in romantic relationships....I think we can be more self-correcting here than we think. I think that many people find individuals very attractive who they know would not be a good person to be in a relationship with - Johnny Depp would be guilty of not being self-corrective here lol. On the point about selecting mates in light of the passing on of genetic material. I think this becomes a slippery slope when we begin to think about what this means for those with disabilities and other health conditions. I don't think we should ignore physical attractiveness, but I am not sure how we should think about it. We may not be able to understand the answer to this question by any other means besides negation. For instance, most of us posit that physical attractiveness should not be the number one variable which trumps everything else. On the other hand, most of us do not believe that is has no bearing on selection. Ultimately, I agree with you that physical attractiveness matters for people entering into a relationship. No doubt. I am just trying to think about how we should act given this information because we see so many individuals selecting people merely for physical attractiveness and others who obsess over their physical attractiveness to a point where eating disorders, depression, a lack of self-worth, and many other horrible things occur. Again, would be very interested to hear your thoughts on all of this.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

1+1 might not equal a romantic relationship but I'd say it (almost) equals romantic interest and so it really increases the probability for a romantic relationship to happen. If you define deeper characterists as accordance with moral values then I'd say that there are definetely other factors as well in that formula, like intelligence for example. Love the Johnny Depp argument 😂😂 And finally I'd say that the obsession over physical attractiveness doesn't only stem from the desire for a romantic partner but also from countless other benefits physical attractiveness brings. Maybe this video will be interesting to you where The Religious Hippie and I discussed that topic kzread.info/dash/bejne/ZmSMl9JsccS8h84.html Ok I have to get back to work, it was a pleasure chatting with you! 😊🖐️

Literally Chad! Hey!! 👋🏻

Very informative. Thank you! Please excuse my bluntness, but I would have enjoyed this better if guest was not interrupted by host so much. It was hard to watch/ listen to. Just constructive criticism. God bless!!

@BiblicalBookworm

6 ай бұрын

Thank you for your feedback!

"I don't know why men think they need to be six feet tall." Probably because of the millions of videos of women saying that they demand men to be six feet lol.

@BiblicalBookworm

2 күн бұрын

Yeah I realized over time (after this video) that this is a common criterion. For me personally that's not important 🙃

Biblical cupid?

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

🤣

5"11 here!!

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

😂

No matter how pious you are as a man, if you're corny, soft and un-groomed, no woman is going to be attracted to you, but will look at you as a "brother"😂. And yeah, you don't have to be a serious bodybuilder, but being fit and having a good build will make a man more attractive, that's a fact.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

I'm not sure what you mean by corny and soft but I agree with the rest. 👍

I know exactly what I what he must want marriage, must want children, must be Catholic, must share my morals and values, doesn't smoke, is boring because I like staying at home, doesn't want to go on vacation, doesn't have pets I am lazy I can't be bother to train or take care of one especially since they might destroy my stuff, must have the same world views, and they can use credit cards but they have to be ok with the fact that I will not and that not having to owe anyone except the government when taxes are due is amazing because they are people who look at you like you are a three headed alien when you say you do not want to be it debt to a credit card company or a bank. I also have to be somewhat attracted to them or it will just be me thinking of guys who are not him and that is not fair to that person.

@BiblicalBookworm

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing!

Cringe. I'm out.

@BiblicalBookworm

5 ай бұрын

😅

I would say that hight is very important for most women. It is strange to see a girl dating someone that's shorter than her. Yes, the guy doesn't have to be super tall but never shorter than her. In conclusion, hight is in fact key! More important than women would like to admit. Short guys have a strong disadvantage against taller guys. I've seen average looking guys losing against ugly taller guys in terms of getting a partner.

@BiblicalBookworm

8 ай бұрын

I agree in as far as most women prefer men who are at least as tall as the woman. But since women are on average shorter than men this shouldn't be too big of a problem mathematically. What I personally don't really understand is why some short women want a guy who is at least 6 feet... 🤷‍♀️

I am a straight man but this might sound a little off Jesus is my priority relationship, women are second.

@BiblicalBookworm

14 күн бұрын

💯

Muscles gets girls interested, period.

@BiblicalBookworm

Ай бұрын

sometimes yes, but usually www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/30i1cr/gym_expectations_vs_reality/?rdt=43320

@cultofhercules

Ай бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm I respectfully disagree. Women value men for their bodies. Physical attractiveness is the most important thing to women. The second most important thing is sexual charisma. No guy who gets too many women to handle will argue against that. I'm fed up with people saying the opposite and proving to myself I'm right every time I step into the real world 😅

@BiblicalBookworm

Ай бұрын

@@cultofhercules ok, then I'm either the only exception or not a woman 🙃

@cultofhercules

Ай бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm hahahah you're funny :D

@cultofhercules

Ай бұрын

@@BiblicalBookworm ok ok I'll drop it, have a good day!

They want money, above all. Lots of it.

@gentlegiants1974

4 ай бұрын

Hear hear. I was fallen away for a long time and ended up living with someone for 8 years, not married, and I can attest to the verity of this statement. Singleness is a blessing in disguise.

@BarbaraMarieLouise

4 ай бұрын

Well, money is not the most important. What I realized due to some ex-boyfriends: Money is very important for men. Men who don’t earn enough according to their own standards have a low self-esteem. That is really a problem for a woman. I really can tell stories about it. The money is not the most important thing. What is important is a man who has a healthy self esteem, not too less and not too much. And as well: what a lot of women want is a men who does something and who also thrives in what he’s doing, not for the money but for himself. And what women want are men who are willing to take on responsibility. And that can mean that he can take care of her and their future children financially for a time as well. That doesn’t need to be a villa or so. It mean being able to put food on the table, having a shelter (means apartment or house) and being a teammate. If a man wastes his income on the newest technology or other stuff instead of paying or his share of the rent then it’s truly a problem. Or if he is a gambler and looses all the income by this. So that’s what most men mistake. And there are a lot of very irresponsible men outside, not just in the secular world, also in the Catholic world. And that is really a huge problem. Irresponsible men are a curse for the world. Luckily there are also others. I’m very well blessed with wonderful three brothers and cousins who take on their responsibilities and founded wonderful marriages and are really good fathers. I‘m very proud of them.

@chrisl1414

4 ай бұрын

You just proved my point, with a good old fashion dose of shaming and judging. @@BarbaraMarieLouise

@BarbaraMarieLouise

4 ай бұрын

@@chrisl1414 no! You didn’t understand anything I wrote! You didn’t get the point.

@chrisl1414

4 ай бұрын

​@@BarbaraMarieLouise I understand very well. I am a wealthy man who after careful consideration decided to look outside of our faith and was able to find a woman who loves me for me. If I were to lose my wealth due to misfortune, I know she would remain at my side and would not shame me. With what I have witnessed, I have no such confidence in the women of our faith, a fact I am saddened by. BTW, your singing is very good. I am also a professional musician.

ignore women

@BiblicalBookworm

4 күн бұрын

I'm sorry to hear that this is your conclusion. I will pray for you 🙏🌺

@curtismoss8616

4 күн бұрын

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@curtismoss8616

4 күн бұрын

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@curtismoss8616

4 күн бұрын

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@curtismoss8616

4 күн бұрын

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!