Seems like kitty knows how to make it better afterwards.

@86PKG

14 күн бұрын

They do. I have a cat as well. Cats react and mirror our emotions. Sometimes I don't even know how stressed I am until it's too late, but with my cat around, he lets me know because he gets stressed as well. So when I pet him, it calms and regulates both of us. Cats are wonderful for us. 😢❤

Thank you for sharing your journey. I get this, people normally don’t understand that I need to be left alone when I’m having a meltdown too.

@susa5846

24 күн бұрын

I feel this so hard. I know it from myself so this was the first thing I learned my child when she was quiet little: it is okay to be alone if you want. But if you want to be with me I'm there. It's very hard for her father to understand and act like this. But he's getting used to it. In kindergarden one person with a neurodivergent kid herself understood. The others learned my child needs time alone after such situations over time. I guess the hardest thing for others is feeling helpless. I personally don't feel so because I know giving her space and time is the best I can do for her in this situations.

@QuasiiiNominall

24 күн бұрын

⁠@@susa5846My father didn’t believe my autism diagnosis, and didn’t believe in mental illness either. So I was raised to shut up and stay quiet, never having anyone stop and explain to me what was “wrong” with me. Nobody told me till I was a teenager and already suffered through mockery and bulling that the school was just fine with. Ended up really harming how I go about life. To this day I cut off relationships because I feel ashamed in myself or think I’d somehow be a burden on them. To me, not being in anyone’s life was like a gift to them, so I pretty much had nobody my whole life. People gotta understand that how we’re treated as children sticks with us our whole lives. Just being autistic is already traumatic, let alone the emotional neglect that loves to come with it.

@cicicave1279

9 күн бұрын

@@QuasiiiNominall Honestly, I feel this to some level, but not necessarily from childhood. More-so in and throughout my adulthood. I'm not saying I've never once experienced kindness in my adulthood, but I was def. put down and criticized a lot for what I chose to do w/my life as an adult later on (and this was by my most of my own family)-but as an adult or not, how does 1 tell their parents something like that? I didn't realize it until recently, but all that put me in a major whirlwind of negativity and not necessarily that, but so many different thing happened throughout my life, that it caused me to hate myself for diff. reasons. I do understand no one is responsible for anyone's happiness and we're only responsible for our own happiness, but having friends is what helps us feel happy esp. if/when they're long-term friends (sadly, most of mine have left my friendship)-I only left 1 of my friends due to long-story short: a toxic situation they got themselves into & refused to listen to me, my gut & my advice despite being right abt. everything I told them abt. a certain someone. Given, I did attempt to reach out to them wanting to be friends w/them again due to Jules LeBlanc saying in 1 of her videos: "Besties don't leave each other,"-I can't find it, but she did say that in 1 of them. Given, I do agree w/that, but it also depends on the situation/circumstances at hand too. Also, I hope the 1st half makes sense.

@user-bb1kq9hl4n

4 күн бұрын

I had this also… Anxiety with the world’s problems…but we can take every thing to God in prayer.We have dreams and desires but God!…. He wants all of our hearts and to hear the cares of the people around us.As we pray for the individuals around us you’ll find their problems start to get answers.And you we’re privileged to help be a part in the answers to their anxieties!Wow,to know God hears your prayers and is also concerned about the circumstances that surround you!What a relationship,now you will find your dreams will start to unravel and come to life!Never give up your pourpose is about to take flight!😊

@countessdelancret2447

4 күн бұрын

@@QuasiiiNominall I always had an issue with cutting off contact because I felt like I was too complicated inside and I felt like I was a burden as a friend. But one friend showed me how wrong I was. He was respectful, kind, but also tenacious. He didn’t give up on me and when I saw after a month that he was worried about my safety and well being and he wasn’t just sending me angry messages I understood I was hurting him by leaving. On my side of things I loved him as a friend, I was going through a hard time and I felt guilty about showing it. But he showed me that you can’t always run from problems and that there are real genuine friends out there who can care and love others unselfishly. If you care a burden to someone let them tell you that and know that they are not worth your friendship. Try to hold onto the good friends you find. Be brave, don’t be afraid of emotion, your life will be better for it.

I can really relate to you as another autistic teen. Meltdowns are so hard that they all just blur together into a monotonous feeling of pain and fear when you try to look back on them. The few memories that remain are all jumbled up, and I can't remember which meltdown was which, and sometimes I even forget why I had a meltdown in the first place. I think this must happen to a lot of people. Thank you for spreading awareness and making people feel less alone

@whitepouch0904

23 күн бұрын

I remember all my meltdowns it usually caused by pent up anger, frustration and rejection. Then after that I’ll feel ashamed 😢

@heywhatupgames6257

23 күн бұрын

I'm not a teenager, but the same thing happens to me. Sometimes I remember my meltdowns and sometimes I don't. It can be really frustrating....😢😔

@marryannc7691

21 күн бұрын

@@nub1vagant I asked my son who is a teen too & it’s the same answer. His meltdowns jumble together.

Your sweet kitty come to comfort you at the end was so great!

@LaurenOliviArt

24 күн бұрын

Big hugs ❤

@jemoeder5347

13 күн бұрын

That moment was sooo sweet. The entire video is so vulnerable and honest and then the cat coming to comfort you... I don't see myself as very neurodivergent but as a 100% cat person I know those moments.

I hate my meltdowns. The slightest thing can set me off. Its like there is more input than I can handle.😔😢

@heathertxuk

24 күн бұрын

Same with me, and my son too. 😔

@Bubble0seven

6 күн бұрын

@@heathertxuk feels with social media it is hard to believe people anymore since "everybody" seems to have this

I’m a high functioning autistic female adult and it’s extremely difficult even for myself. I have a high masking ability but I have the tendency to shut down and shut everyone out of my life for an extended period of time. It helps but I don’t think it’s a sound solution to my problem. Wishing you well in these circumstances 🥺

@dorisoneal1323

14 күн бұрын

You just described how my daughter handles her difficulties! She's also high functioning & has a strong masking ability. I hate when she shuts us out. But at the same time I understand that is how she's best able to cope. So, I just wait for her to open up to us again.

"hot static" is a fabulous way of describing a feeling or experience that others may not have ever had. I have experienced "hot static" during/after a meltdown.

@Hayden-rc1ru

Күн бұрын

As someone who is not autistic, I've experienced ''hot static'' in other types of overwhelming situations, so it was probably a helpful description for a lot of us.

The hardest part of mine is being scared of hurting others. I don't. Just raising my voice is enough for me to feel I could be a detriment to who's trying to help me. So leaving me alone is indeed the best course of action because I can just feel my feelings and not worry about anyone else.

@shaae_26

7 күн бұрын

it’s the same for me. i say stuff i don’t mean and i scream at people i love if they try to get involved and it just makes it worse cuz then i had myself for it

@HelloHamburger

7 күн бұрын

There's been a lot of times with my parents that I don't care if I hurt their feelings because they'll keep pushing me into a bad place until I explode and won't leave me alone.

I had many meltdowns as a young child and teen, and I wasn’t diagnosed with autism at the time… so my meltdowns were seen as anger issues, and I was often reprimanded. Afterwards I’d feel so embarrassed and then would have to deal with the aftermath… and with family members thinking I’m just misbehaved and a bad person… it’s really hard, and I know how it feels. Afterwards, the comedown is really hard to deal with also…

❤ I am a 38yo autistic/adhder I have 2 kids with the same diagnosis. You were so strong. You were able to describe what I watched when my kids meltdown; what I feel when I have a meltdown. Thank you so much. I am so glad you have your momma to guide you. Keep making the videos you can. It helps people like me.

Meltdowns can be physically painful can't they. So many people don't realise.

@HonestlyHolistic

18 күн бұрын

Questioning now if my mental breakdowns are actually meltdowns… how can I tell the difference?

Meltdowns suck. I can see you’re still coming down from it in this video. The comedown is worse than the Meltdown itself. Or that’s the way it is with my boy. Sending you big good vibrations. ❤️

I hate meltdowns. I tend not to remember them either, but loved ones have had no issue telling me in great, glorious, guilt-ridden detail. I agree you shouldn't try to interact with someone in a meltdown. I think of it as the emotional equivalent of an epileptic seizure. We have zero control over what we say and do. ❤❤❤

Toren’s emotional honesty is wonderful.

Hey Toren, thank you I know that was difficult for you to talk about and you are very courageous in doing so, because it helps me a Man who was only diagnosed as a 55yr old man, and I recognise myself so much at the same age. I’m glad that you have an understanding Mum, and your beautiful cat to come and help you through those emotionally difficult times. Until you verbalised( British English sp) the memory loss it reminded me of all the times I couldn’t remember an argument, or a meltdown and what I said. Thanks mate I really appreciate you being vulnerable like that.

I’m an mother, g-mother and aunt of neurodivergents. The more I watch your mom and you , the more I understand my exciting family members and most importantly myself. You are the first person I have ever related to as for a my “break downs”. I recognize when I need alone time, however if I must “give my time” to other tasks I become very frustrated. I can never process heated conversations and cannot even remember what I just said. I’ve never been able to remember conversations, written transcripts or video I can recall. Thank you for sharing.

Youre not alone. It's extremely upsetting to feel, and you're not alone on your feelings.

The loosing memory is so real

Hot static is a good description, I think. I've been told by my therapist to feel where in my body I'm experiencing discomfort during intense emotions, and what kind of physical feeling it is. Maybe that can help, it does help me a lot.

@susa5846

24 күн бұрын

Thank you, I'll try this. ❤

And having a cat who knows is such a gift. Getting cats has helped us so much.

I'm late diagnosed and I struggle with shame after meltdowns. They're also extremely physically draining to me. I often forget why a meltdown occurred and will sometimes not realize they're coming on until it's too late to prevent them. Wishing you easier moment and so much support!

Thank you for voicing this. My son is Non-Verbal. When he has a meltdown his presents with hitting his forehead, check, chin. We got a helmet for when he does this. But he sometimes takes it off. (He’s fast) We got it because he was causing lumps and bruises. It’s heartbreaking to watch.

@bumblebee5990

24 күн бұрын

Hugs to you Mom. You are amazing!

@daisyjo88

23 күн бұрын

As a mum, this is the worst part for me. We didn’t know what autism was until our child was seventeen. Just learning the term “meltdown” helped us be less anxious and more supportive. Thinking of you and wishing you well.

I hate having public meltdowns it's so embarrassing and like you said not remembering what you did makes it hard, I seem to create what I might've done in my head and then panic over what I might have done

Thanks for posting this. It's really helpful to see how I'm not alone. I hope others find it helpful too.

Aww it's exhausting. Suppressing feels worse for me

Sending comforting vibes. Feel better soon. I'm a middle-aged autistic woman. I seldom have meltdowns, but when I do, I still remember them. Most of the time I just cry. Generally I can control everything except the crying. Even on those occasions when I want to scream and/or smash things, I can refrain. It's mostly an explosive internal reaction.

I love how your cat comes over to help. Thanks for sharing, you are really a gift to this world Toren, and I so appreciate your mother, also ❤️

aw I can relate (ptsd) when I have an episode or panic attack I forget most of it after and get tired after. But my Brain is protecting me from something when I can't remember what ever it was that upset me. When you are ready and calmer maybe you might remember and than you can analyze it more logically. But it upsets me too when there is information mixed in the memory that I really need to remember and can't.

Awwww, Toren! 😢 I can so relate! Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this aspect of your life. I’m sure that’s not easy to do, but it sure does make others (like me) feel seen and understood. I’m so sorry you hit a rough patch today. Hang in there, dude.

Meltdown are hard to describe when someone is having one. And when someone wants to help it’s gets harder to understand what they are going through. I’ve been on both sides, specially when my anxiety is getting worse on some days. You are right when you are having a meltdown sometimes your mind will wipe it out, but there are people who are there for you and will help with your meltdown after you calm down. Everyone goes through these meltdowns and we still care and love you no matter what happens. Hope you have better day soon.

I am so proud of you young man. I am a 43 year old female who had ADHD impulsive/hyperactivity type since 3rd grade. We never treated it, so I am a grown woman who still has meltdowns. Somehow it's less understandable to see an adult go through it - I highlight the help and knowledge available today. You got this, and you are NOT alone ❤

Melt downs are so hard on both child and mom. My daughter used to bite my body. Arms legs, all over. She would kick holes in every wall in my house over and over and bash her head off the floor. I knew it wasn't easy on her but boy, I never thought I'd make it through those years of meltdowns... Happy to say meltdowns are rare now that shes a teen

It does happen so fast and even though I've started to recognize the signs I need to just go lay on the floor in a quiet room and stare at the ceiling, sometimes I can't or I try to suppress because I have other things to do which I inevitably regret. For me the feelings of shame and guilt afterwards are the worst. Self-forgiveness and compassion are so important for after meltdowns. ❤

I have never been diagnosed with autism but when I was younger, and even now I have meltdowns. It took me a long time to realise why they happen and still don't know the words to describe it. As soon as it's over, I forget what happened, why it happened, and those around me believe it to be a flaw in me.

I'm an autistic adult. We are not safe in society because of meltdowns. I have been handcuffed and taken away for weeks because I made people uncomfortable. I have developed PTSD and great fear of law enforcement and EMS. I hope someday it becomes safe for us to exist. Compassion for you my friends.

It helps me to think about how our neurology works, so I just think of synapses being overloaded and flushing out (includes short term memory). It's maybe worth thinking of it like very very bad vertigo. Or having a really awful flu for a very short period of time. Don't feel bad about yourself because there is no way to fully control what is basically autonomous nervous system response.

Dude, we all meltdown at some point or another- I can see how it would be frustrating not to know the triggers as it's wiped from memory, but maybe you don't get stuck in an endless loop of replaying that 'old tape' trying to figure it out... I dearly love you and your mom- I'm autistic like her, and have a son much like you!

Thinking about you all and hoping for a better day tomorrow.

Meltdowns suck, I never know what’s going to set me off. my cat also comforts me after I’ve had a meltdown too. Thank you for posting these videos; they’re really informative and they make me feel like I’m not alone in this world that is made for neurotypicals.

I grew up with autism myself and I had ADHD… so I understand. I’ve been through this exact thing myself… Your not alone keep pushing through you got this.

Such a gift to have such suport and awareness so early in life. I am almost 40 and only understanding myself now.

I'm sure yall have already thought of this but on the off chance you haven't, do you have a self care plan in place for after? Like if a hot bath is soothing with whatever sounds you like hearing that could be good to have that plan for after every meltdown. Or if you just want to sit in a room in the dark with silence? I don't think I'm autistic but I do have something kin to meltdowns that happens to me sometimes and going outside with my headphones in with my favorite music playing helps me after. For my son he just likes to be left alone and walk. When he is done walking he feels much better.

Undiagnosed ADHD here, possibly autism too. Absolutely drowning here and had the meltdown on the phone with my team leader because the workload they're giving me just isn't possible. I'm stressed, I'm overloaded, and I'm not receiving any accommodation whatsoever bc I'm not diagnosed but I can't afford to be. I see you, I feel you and I'm crying with you.

@njrom2975

3 күн бұрын

Do you think u need accommodation just cause you got Adhd ? I don’t think it’s fair for everyone . I think your boss is an asshole but don’t use your adhd or whatever to get accommodations from a neurotypical job, neurotypical have problems and hardships and sometimes the boss is just a bad leader , instead of asking for accommodations why not complain and report HIS behavior and treatment to everyone, not just u .

@FORGOTTENMINDFREAK23

3 күн бұрын

@njrom2975 I'm not asking for unreasonable things, and some other people also have similar accommodations. Adhd can be disabling, and someone with it has every right to ask for things that will help them do their job. No different to people asking for a desk setup, etc.

I understand where your coming from I have a little bit of austism and ADHD. When I was a kid I Was hyper sensitive to anything and everyone which made me a target to bullying.

thank you for being brave and sharing. you help so many people,

This broke my heart. Thank you for being vulnerable and brave to share this.

❤Thank you for your courage in showing such raw footage It helped me understand someone I love who can’t always find the words to share such raw feelings❤️much love to Toren and family what you do matters and you make a difference in the lives of everyone whether autistic or those of us who love them❤

Thank you for sharing. Thank you Mom for your gentle, thoughtful model. I love the safety of your relationship. You put in the work to be safe.

It's challenging to witness as one can't help but empathize (incidentally my cats also show up for comfort during the post-meltdown cooling period); growing up undiagnosed I often worried that I might hurt someone if I lost control while upset. It's not easy to learn how to manage a behaviour that one has no clear memory of, particularly given that men were (traditionally) taught to suppress our emotions anyway.

Toren you and your mom are amazing ❤your helping so many people understand what happens to us and what it’s like to be this way . thank you

❤I love how authentic you are and how you share with people to help them learn and support people like you.❤️

How lovely to have caring family to discuss and support through. ❤

I actually had a meltdown earlier today. I got extremely overwhelmed because my dad did something that completely chnaged my routine for the day and I shut down. I dont usually remember what happens either, and its so frustrating when you can't remember. Thank you so much for posting this, because it makes me feel less alone. Thank you ❤

@daisyjo88

23 күн бұрын

I’m so glad you have shared this example! Abrupt changes in routine (or even non abrupt) are such a challenge! Especially if those close to you don’t understand. I hate to think of all the times a meltdown has been labeled an “overreaction” and the person shamed for it. Hoping you are having a good day.

"Hot static" is so brilliantly descriptive. We feel you.

Awh, I’m sorry you had a meltdown ❤ i can 100% relate to this, i can’t usually remember stuff after meltdowns, and as a very moody person: i have a lot of them- almost daily, lol. I love how you express yourself and be completely vulnerable with your audience, it’s beautiful. ❤

❤❤❤ I'm so sorry Toren! Wishing you a safe and happy day!

I explain it as my brain is a computer and it has to force a restart to save itself. Hang in there it gets better with age.

Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable moment and your insight. It helps others to know some strategies to help and when just to step back and come back later to support, though it is always a bit heartbreaking to watch people go through something and feel helpless too. Be gentle with yourself and know that you touch many people's lives. Feel better and I hope the rest of your day is full of sunshine.

I have autism, I love how you help people feel understood and supported

I am so sorry you are going through this. I still remember all the meltdowns I don’t remember - especially bad during teen years. Once I really got a handle on my stress, and really keeping a grip on my emotions, they got better. I pray you experience the same thing as you get older. I have a very low stress life now and I haven’t had a true, amnesia level meltdown in over 10 years. I have had shutdowns that I knew meant I needed to withdrawal and recoup or my family would see a side of me I couldn’t take back (and probably wouldn’t remember) but we can manage those and I am ok with those… I pray in time you find some sort of similar solace and control… and amount of environmental control I need to not have meltdowns is very high… so it’s not like I’m “better” - but I found a system that works to keep me safe and healthy, and keep my family safe and healthy too.

the thing that struck me most about this is.... what a wonderfully supportive Mom you are ❤

My son has autism too, and as a mom I can understand how intense and draining meltdowns are. Thank you for sharing this moment with us, and for bringing awareness to so many people. You're an amazing young man. I wish you a better tomorrow. 😊🫶

New-ish subscriber, here! And I wanted to say, I think you’re really cool! And unique! And sincere! And entertaining! And weird, in the best way! And also..? Increasingly more and more eloquent in these! Plus still growing and learning! I think you’re going to go on to do GREAT things in life. And in fact, you are ALREADY doing great things, with this channel! Sorry you had such a rough day today. Love and hugs. From me, 35-year-old woman, also on the spectrum, (milder severity than you, though, I think), who used to have lots of meltdowns as a kid. But who rarely has them now. Hopefully it gets better for you, too, as you age.

Thank you, Toren. You're eloquence and willingness to share your vulnerability is a gift to so many people. Your beautiful cat is very sensitive to your emotional state.😊

I'm 24 and I could never put this feeling into words; I still can't, but you described it perfectly. I still have my meltdowns but they're better now that I'm living alone ❤ Edit: I don't want Toren to feel like moving out is what he needs or anything, but it was for me. My parents were/still are my triggers for alot of things. Having my own space gives me a little sense of control

That was incredibly brave of you, to so openly share your emotions. You really are helping others in bigger ways than you can imagine. You are an amazing person. ❤

Take your time!, and hug that sweet kitty ❤️

It's really validating to hear that other people get these memory wipes from during a meltdown. I always hate that after such an emotional time, I just don't remember anything. Also such a sweet kitty ❤

I have a 17yr old autistic Grandson who has meltdowns...it's hard and it's heartbreaking. I'm crying now for this young man.

The love of a mother for her child is the BEST MEDICINE. My mom has gone to Heaven but your mom reminds me of her (having cared, with joy in heart, for my sister with cerebral palsy) - thank you! Hug your mom AND I wish for you peace and serenity!

Praying for everyone in pain, mental or physical, to be healed. Hang in there, and don't stop believing in the power of prayer!!

So heart wrenching that anyone has to suffer like this. Sending love your way, buddy.

You explained that perfectly for my neurotypical brain buddy thankyou

Thank you so much for sharing

Thank you, helps me understand my lil Mr. Hes got such a huge heart an totally falls apart after "meltdowns" ❤

My meltdowns feel like a whole body headache and feels very tight. I can’t hear because my ears feel so plugged see because I’m crying and all I see is red. or breathe because I’m crying so deeply it hurts. These last for 5-6 hours and as you said the come down period is worse because your body is so exhausted and you can’t relax and you just want to sleep but you can’t. Toren you are not alone I’m 20 and have experienced 100’s of meltdowns. Just know there are others like you it’s not only you there of millions of autistic people this is the negative side of autism the positive side is our rapid recall of our special interest facts. Then once the meltdown is over I like to be in my room alone with my headphones on and rock or script and repeat songs from my childhood. I like to be under my weighted blanket and that really helps me.

@bumblebee5990

24 күн бұрын

I love your self care, it’s beautiful!

What a sweet guy. Thanks for a glimpse into your world.

Yup I get this. When I have a meltdown I just want to be away from everyone. Usually crying alone with no one looking at me. Usually outside in the fresh air. The stupidest things set me off, and unfortunately can't really be made better, just have to ride the wave.

You have the best mom, and I am so glad you are able to share your experiences as well as you do, so you both can help others. As an undiagnosed AuDHD parent, I did my best to help support my kids during their meltdowns.... unfortunately we didn't have nearly as many resources then, and I had to advocate in the courts, at schools, to family members.... It was exhausting, for my kids and for me. Videos like this are a fantastic resource for parents trying to explain why the ABA a judge orders is making things worse, not better. Or for explaining why school resource officers are escalating situations, and that giving kids the space they are asking for is the best de-escalation technique.

So glad you took this public, ppl need to know this. You are so brave for doing this. I wish you all the best.

You’re not alone . It’s ok

Thank you so much for helping us understand better and to not interfere. My grandson has autism and I need your wisdom and courage to cope. 🙏🏼 Bless you, kind soul….

You are helping so many people with your videos. Thank you! ❤

I thank this young man all the brave people sharing their stories on this channel. I send warm loving thoughts to all of you.

Thank you for sharing honey. I'm 62 and I'm high functioning Autistic. No one understood me, and was never diagnosed until now. I've struggled my whole life and now i feel like I'm not crazy. This isn't helping my situation. My hubby has Cancer and it has spread. Praying for complete healing from Jesus. The stress isn't helping. In having melt downs several times a week now. Prayers very much appreciated. You are in my prayers are well honey. Hugs, and much love to ya honey.✝️🙏❤️🕊️💜🌹🌻

Hope you feel better soon and thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. It's really courageous and I hope that you can be proud of yourself. Also lots of love to your mom for her great compassion and all the care she's giving. Sorry if this sounds weird, I'm not a native speaker. But I wanted to share my thoughts for your very helpful, insightful videos and your courage to put yourself and your journey out there

@ralphlyda4545

10 күн бұрын

Celestria, I have worked as a language interpreter; I can’t think of anything in your paragraphs that a native speaker could have said any better! You have made a lovely comment, & a lovely contribution!

Thank you for sharing. It's very helpful in letting others know that they are not alone. You and your family are doing wonderful work!

You are a beautiful young man. Be kind to yourself! I’m sending lots of healing energy and prayers.

Bless you, you're so courageous to share your inner world x

You are doing such a great service. Thank you Toren. You speak for so many

It’s exhausting and takes days to recover but you got this 🙏🏼🌹🙏🏼

Praying for you!! Thank you for sharing this!! You're a strong person!!!

Thank you Toran. That had to have been difficult, but I appreciate your advice. Have a wonderful day.

Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. Very courageous and good advice. Blessings to you.

That mindwiping is one of the reasons I’d ‘forget’ that individuals were actually abusive to me- now I’m learning about my own unique AuDHD landscape so that I can navigate that better. You are so self aware, it’s wonderful to see Autistic/ ND individuals being raised in ways that work for THEM and not being forced into NT chaos. ❤

I had a meltdown in front of my step daughter, she was snapping the threads on a wool blanket I wove in college. No one gave me grace, and I was really good, I internalized, caused lots of harm to my internal self, but didn’t yell, or act out. My wife made me feel really guilty, and even though the girl apologized the next morning and I forgave them they never felt comfortable with me again, they had guilt I’m told. It makes me just want to isolate and not inflect my presence on anyone

@bumblebee5990

24 күн бұрын

You are not responsible for their, or anyone else’s feelings. You did the best you could and the world might not be good enough for you, but we very much want you here and present. These are just feelings, they are not you. I feel confident that time and continued connection can transform all things, relationships change and grow. We all have moments, they are not what defines us. For the record, I would not like to see my efforts harmed, but chances are it was just some stimming (also a human thing… plenty of variations). All this seems very human, your great, kind heart is what they love, like the meltdowns the memories fade for everyone when we are met with loving kindness.

Thank you for your honesty and rawness ❤️

Toren, thank you 100% for sharing all that you do. The fun times along with the really vulnerable ones. You are so brave and so beautiful. You are making a difference. Hugs.

I love the sweet relationship you and your mom have. I’m so sorry that you have struggles at times. You are such a bright, articulate, and kind young man. Keep being perfectly you. ❤

I often get labelled as the calm one is all situations and generally in a crisis I thrive (thank you ADHD) but when I do get overwhelmed, it generally turns into a "pull the plug" feeling. Like whatever is happening, I need to disengage from it and go into a "safe-only" zone. Only safe places, sounds, food, people etc. This is one of the ways my assistance dog helps me. He's a mobile safe place, texture (fur stroking stim) and coping mechanism (trained to DPT) all in one