I Confronted My Father After CSA
Ойын-сауық
Welcome to Unfiltered Stories. Today, our guest Katy Stanley shares her life story with us. From such a young age, she was subjected to CSA at the hands of her father. For a long time, she thought she was dreaming about this experience.
After she grew up and started her healing process, the only thing she only wanted was a heartfelt apology from her father. That's why she confronted him and demanded a letter explaining everything he did to her.
#Survivor #Interview #Inspiring
Our guests sit down with their loved ones to discuss their real-life secrets, difficulties and traumas for the first time. Here, we embrace vulnerability and we celebrate what makes us different, without shame or judgement. Welcome to Unfiltered Stories, it’s time to start healing. 🌅
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@craigharris41
4 ай бұрын
Yeah, does she have any proof?
@gismo2828
20 күн бұрын
No this are inesesnt shes very intelligent ❤ from Europe Switzerland jist the best i feel you
It's NOT your fault. It's not your fault, and you did NOTHING wrong. Say it a million times, because it's true!
@doeeyes2
11 ай бұрын
Exwctly!! Even if a child does try some inappropriate touching or wtv...(like her father said she did) it is up to the adult to not engage and stop that type of activity immediately. No matter WHAT it is never ever the child's fault. And that goes for young children all the way up to 18. Ive heard so many stories of fathers or uncles or stepfathers trying to say that the "she knew what she was doing" or "she would walk around the house half naked to tease me" and its just 🤮🤮🤮
@sassychick7238
11 ай бұрын
Well said!!
@VehMrnt-cy4jo
10 ай бұрын
Exactly ❤
@kateblanch7068
7 ай бұрын
@@jonelbondyingnuezca742you are a disgrace
@ashleyw6160
6 ай бұрын
YES!! I was molested by my dad too, but my mom wouldn't believe me (until 15 yrs later when he finally admitted to her, anyways). So no one had ever told me it's not my fault, until around 2 yrs ago, when I started watching Swoop here on YT. She's such a beautiful soul. She tells/reminds us that it's not our fault & repeats it like u did pretty often. I cried like a baby the 1st time I heard her say it & now, I still cry every time I hear it, just not as bad, lol. It really does help, so I try to tell/remind ppl (just like u have here 😉) as often as I can! Anyways, thank u so much for doing that, love!!! Sending u lots of peace & love ~From TN ❤❤❤
He has not taken responsibility for anything he had done. Please don’t ever let him near ANY of your children. Bless you for getting help. NONE of it was your fault.
@tinam761
11 ай бұрын
💯 He should NEVER be around children EVER!
@cosmicreef5858
9 ай бұрын
or to you or to any innocent living being, fe deserves to be in Hell
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
Dad said inappropriate things to me, it was mostly verbal, so he thought it didn't constitute sexual abuse.He blamed me and threatened me. He is pathetic! I warn other family and other women, especially those with girls, he can't be trusted. He expects me to be silent so he won't go to jail. I won't protect him. He blamed me for the abuse, not taking responsibility, nor does he. I don't like, love or respect him, much less trust him! He's a sicko. His brother got into telling me sex jokes. They are pathetic! Not all members of his family are like them, thankfully! Dad started when I was 12 1/2, it went on for decades. His brother started by telling me a sexual joke. I complained to their mother who said "Have a sense of humor" Nothing was funny about the joke or the situation. I lost any relationship with her for her enabling the uncle. So pathetic. I felt alone, betrayed and blamed. Dad still expects me to protect him. I won't!
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
I was 26 when the uncle made the nasty joke. I gave up on him and dad. They are pathetic!
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
I agree! I warned family about him. He expects me to put up and shut up. He expected me to let him off the hook.He expects to continue and me be silent. He's wrong! I warned my sister, who has a daughter. I warned my aunt and uncle who have two daughters and a son, too. I warn other women, especially those with daughters, to have nothing to do with him. I hope they listened. I am breaking the cycle! I chose not to have kids, so they won't be hurt by him!
I'm surprised that he wasn't charged and convicted of child abuse. The therapist is a mandated reporter! My heart breaks for you!
@hannahneville4573
11 ай бұрын
Wow. I didn't see the whole clip as it's just a tad too heavy for me at this point in my life but I hope the aren't still practicing! If so, I think this lovely lady needs to report them..
@nursenicole222
11 ай бұрын
Not if she is an adult
@crystalhaataja304
11 ай бұрын
Sadly a lot of states still have limitations on abuse if it isn’t rape, especially, even though many still do for rape even. It’s why I never reported and it’s sad because my state just changed it to no limitation but I’ve blocked almost all the memory now 😔 what I do have left is very fuzzy... there’s nothing I can do now except hope and pray they can’t hurt anyone else. If my memories ever came back I would report. But I was abused a LOT as a very young girl, by two different people. One of them was caught and my mom has told me details about it that I don’t remember. So my brain had learned how to shove it all away already by age 4.
@alexzandria6803
9 ай бұрын
They don’t have to report unless the crime is still happening or it happened within the statute.
@sarasvensson6026
8 ай бұрын
They only have a duty to report if the abuse is still going on/if the person is still at risk of being victimised.
This is akin to murdering the soul of a child. So it must be treated as murder.
@drew2fast489
7 ай бұрын
I agree
@Jesusgivesnewlife
4 ай бұрын
Agreed
@_i_took_a_shit_in_jesus_mouth_
4 ай бұрын
Are you saying that this brave woman isn't a survivor? That's insulting.
@TheGillimcwilli
Ай бұрын
My soul was murdered. Age 3.
@cynthiaweir5697
Ай бұрын
I agree and they should get life in prison. Destroying your own child’s childhood with this perverted, sick action. I think they treat it too lightly in the courts.
I am 57-years old. My father began molesting me before I was six years old. I blocked so much out. I am so impressed with you for being open and sharing your story. I have still not been able to share my story. I admire you so much. ❤ You are helping others.
@katystanley2539
17 күн бұрын
I’m so so sorry that happened to you 🧡🧡😔
@wenthialovely8143
6 күн бұрын
I'm 60. I hear you darl 🥺
@teem4207
4 күн бұрын
I am 61 but it was my brothers and then sometimes his friends.
Your dad is a demon and please don’t feel bad for knowing he’s a monster it’s not your fault. You are so strong and brave for sharing your story.
I had same expectations. My dad did oral sex on me too, and pis private between my legs-we both climaxed. He never Penetrated me. This went on for years. I also learned that the brown pill, he was giving me, was birth control. This stuff started when I was 5 until 18. He told me once that if I got pregnant, to tell me to tell "them" it was some boy. There was much much more. I'm 71 years old now. I have lots of therapy because I have PTSD and still get triggered. We are very strong people. ❤
@katystanley2539
9 ай бұрын
I’m so sorry that happened to you! 🧡
@martinln1932
7 ай бұрын
😊
@cloro1238
4 ай бұрын
@@martinln1932why are you smiling
@DefiantAngel87
Ай бұрын
I'm so sorry
@susannasnyder-vm3hd
24 күн бұрын
@@martinln1932wtf check your emoji not ok
Can he not go to prison? He is beyond sick. He needs to be registered as a sex offender. She needs to take him to court. What a disgusting narcissist.
You are right Katy all because you share blood with someone that doesn't mean that they should be in your life
@kellymurphy6667
11 ай бұрын
Right! I have never understood the logic of those that say 'but they're your family?' Like, that somehow justifies their shitty actions? OR grants them permission to be abusive, exploitative, manipulative etc etc. I now see it as something that people who've never experienced toxic family systems say, having not stopped to think about it first.
@angelaholmes8888
11 ай бұрын
@@kellymurphy6667 totally agree with you
@jgamer2228
11 ай бұрын
The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. Chosen bonds are stronger than blood bonds
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
I agree with you, I will not protect my dad, his shaming and blaming and threatening me did not work. I told my sister, mother(further), her mom. I tell other women, especially those with daughters, not to trust/have anything to do with him. I hope I am breaking the cycle of his SA of me.
@whimsical_me5135
Ай бұрын
"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." Basically the family we choose for ourselves is usually more loyal and trustworthy than our biological family. Edit: oh dang, I should read all the replies before I add my own!
I can’t fathom still wanting to allow him to meet your children , even is he apologized appropriately, I would never ever trust home alone around any children
@Jesusgivesnewlife
4 ай бұрын
You probably haven't been sexually abused by your dad then
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
Don't let him near your kids, ever!
@LeeLee1985Official
29 күн бұрын
Exactly! The cycle will always continue if the offender is allowed around children
@annalisadelbove6133
17 күн бұрын
I agree, I can relate to this my father also is a sexual abuser in s subtle way and if I had kids I wouldn't allow him to be alone with my kids. No matter if he changed there is no room for such an option.
@silverdoe9477
2 күн бұрын
I understand most children are torn, because the abuser is somehow not the same “person” as their loving dad. When a child is hurt, their mental development is stunted at that age. So you’re still 4 & love your parent.
Don't ever let him near your children ever please dont make that mistake !!!!!!!!!!
I am so proud of you for exposing him. I hope he has not abused any other child. I, too, am a survivor of CSA. My father was a pedophile and I need not say more. My mother was an accomplice. I wrote a book describing the abuse in detail and it was sent to him, and he denied everything. I did not go to his funeral (died of colon cancer).
@AndreaRoldancpa
10 ай бұрын
Name of book? Hope I can find it on my library app
@SM-md7qy
10 ай бұрын
@@AndreaRoldancpa It was not published. It was written as a means of self therapy, was sent to him by another individual and was then destroyed without my permission.
@Emma88rose
9 ай бұрын
@@AndreaRoldancpaI think it was a personal diary, probably not a published book.
@WhaleCommunicators
9 ай бұрын
I don't blame you for not going to his funeral. My mother is dying and I have often thought (over the last 30 years) the day she dies will be the day I remember as the day my heart and soul are totally emancipated from the horrid parent and person she's been . Your same sex parent is suppose to love their child unconditionally and lead by their example. I remember my mother taking store clerks and Dr office's staff OUT with her words leaving them shaking and in tears and her extreme need to always be right and mad at the same time. She will die after all the lies, rages and untreated mental disorders including narcissism that she leaves our world with. Never took responsibility for her mental health and always blamed others for her issues. The way she treated my brothers and Father were just as bad and caused much mental distress to every member of the family. I've actually asked God if he would play her video of her death back for me so I can see it. I want to make sure she's GONE & that she gets what she never took back nor sought treatment for 100 fold laying on others by her horrendous choices. I believe she sexually abused my brothers and had a memory of her taking me to a ritual gathering in the Catholic church when I was about 4. I scared the shit out of her, the priest and attendees. I began talking like a adult and telling them what they were doing to kids was a blaspemy to God and there would be huge repercussions. It got me out of a childhood of sexual abuse by the Catholic church. They hate kids who talk too much. I went right home and told my dad - my mom told him I had an overactive imagination and was lying and last time I went to those kind of church get togethers . . . but not my brothers. Whenever we moved we always had our new priest over for dinner. I truly think Mom was showing them what she was offering up for them and her church (her sons). I wasn't negotiable because I had a big mouth. Thank God THANK GOD thank god.
@MyStylesRReality
8 ай бұрын
Me too so painful I never had any close relationship after this had sexual anxieties too much and have become almost asexual now rather identify myself to it as I have hated sexual contacts too much
The perfect playmate. Omg. I'm so sorry. I lost my daddy. He was an amazing man. He was a police officer. We had 1 rule. Never disrespect your mother or your siblings. He passed away from heart disease when I was 21. It absolutely kills me that men like your father walk this earth, and mine is gone.😢
@Linda-in9ns
11 ай бұрын
Sorry about your Dad. Thanks for his service! My Dad was like yours! 🙏🏼❤️he was a war hero WW2
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Amanda, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
@blackingingerpurrin
Ай бұрын
It’s like the wicked live long to roam the earth
@Michael-zv8cl
18 күн бұрын
The perfect playmate? That statement threw me off... Are you saying you wish your dad would have been more like her dad?
I'm so proud that you were able to confront him. That took courage. So many people after being abused are afraid to do that. What he did was 100 percent wrong and he should be held accountable. I know that goes without saying but my child molesters get away with it and the victim is left with a lifetime of pain.
@massagegirlsj
11 ай бұрын
Many I said "my" which wSa typo.
When I was around 12 I asked me father “why did you hurt me?” He said nonchalantly “I don’t know.” And that was it. Nothing more was said.
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
I’m so so sorry 💛
@Linda-in9ns
11 ай бұрын
Lousy creep!!!! 🤨
@c.p.5741
11 ай бұрын
That's crazy. I pray that you find healing my love ❤
@myishenhaines1706
11 ай бұрын
@@c.p.5741 Thank you. I’m in therapy. It’s been five years in therapy now and I’m having positive breakthroughs. ❤️
@c.p.5741
11 ай бұрын
@@myishenhaines1706 awww I'm so happy for you. Keep it up love! And find your happy space ♥ 🙏
I have lived with the same unfortunate burden since I was 4 years old. My father passed away in 2019 and it was extremely traumatic for me. I never confronted my father. I never even told anyone until I was over the age 30 and I told my husband and my mother. I had 3 daughters when my dad died, that my father never had anything to do with. I left his house the day I turned 18. I was out of there. I couldn’t take the mental abuse anymore. It wasn’t sexual anymore. He never even acted like it ever happened. He was a severe alcoholic and drug abuser, the alcohol killed him. I had to be the power of attorney at the hospital bc by this time my father and my stepmom had divorced and he was alone. It was the hardest and most devastating day of my life so far. I hope I never have to feel that type of hurt again. Edit: sorry for the long comment. This just really touched my heart and made me want to literally have a conversation with this young woman. I haven’t ever been able to relate to anyone about this. And I’m glad of that bc I would never want anyone to have to go through that, BUT it is kind of nice to know that I’m not alone and that it’s not just ME and I’m not a freak or “damaged goods”.
@PrincessAfrica3
11 ай бұрын
Im so sorry my dear😢❤
@innermeetme
10 ай бұрын
You're not damaged goods. You were taken advantage of by someone who should protect you and care for you above all else. I know it's hard because of how entangled you get in the trauma, but that's not what you are, it's something that happened to you. I do think entanglement is the right term. It has helped me to look at my own trauma that way. You're not the thing itself; you're not "of" it, you're caught in it. There's a big difference. I hope that speaks to you.
@katystanley2539
10 ай бұрын
Sending you so much love 💛
@carhiful
10 ай бұрын
💐❤️
@crystalpoole879
10 ай бұрын
@@innermeetme thank you so much for those kind words
I don't think we should look for apologies from our abusers. We know they hurt us we don't need them to say they hurt us. We don't need their permission to heal and to forgive them. We forgive for us. Not our abusers
@myishenhaines1706
11 ай бұрын
It never ever someone else’s place to tell a survivor how to handle healing from their trauma. You have no right to tell other survivors to do what you have done. We are allowed to follow our own path.
@OeishaB
11 ай бұрын
@@myishenhaines1706 I never told anyone what to do I was speaking on my own point of view. But I agree everyone heals in their own way
@audrey-vf9ef
11 ай бұрын
I agree whats the point in getting an apology from the devil? Theyre not human.
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
Very true, but I needed it for myself to be able to have closure
@candylove49
11 ай бұрын
@@audrey-vf9efxactly! It’s also dangerous because they will go along with it by “apologizing”, writing letters,giving gifts just to abuse you AGAIN later. This is why I think it’s best and safer to give yourself closure and stay always from them!
As a survivor, I can not imagine continuing a relationship with my abuser most especially if they were my parent or sibling. My heart grieves for survivors that can not let go. Like this beautiful soul said, you are not obligated to have a relationship with them. You are definitely not obligated to have your child(ren) in a relationship with them. The more we talk about child SA the more we can manage the lifetime trauma of child SA and we may prevent the SA of another child. Be well. Ase'
@innermeetme
11 ай бұрын
So intelligent. Boundaries are everything. They say NO to abuse and end its action. They also reflect a high form of self-love and inner knowing. Thank you for sharing.
@VeronicaJohnson-yn1cr
10 ай бұрын
Now men in power have taken away the right for a female to have an abortion if they get pregnant by these sexual abusers.
@Jesusgivesnewlife
4 ай бұрын
Unless it's your own parent you have not no idea what you'd do
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
I'm afraid he will start it again. He got one of his brothers to bother me, with a sexual joke. Inappropriate. I was shocked. Then, I complained to their mother who said "Have a sense of humor" The joke, nor the situation were funny, she enabled the uncle and expected me to put up and shut up. End of my relationship with the troublesome trio!
@sharoncarey6514
Ай бұрын
What is wrong over in America. So much of this going on. Is it generational trauma or what ?
How terrible, who could hurt such an innocent little angel 😢
@angelaholmes8888
11 ай бұрын
Someone who is without a conscience
@janan1105
11 ай бұрын
Someone who's evil 😢
@trent_king
11 ай бұрын
Words like: innocent *little* and angel are descriptors that motivate predation. Please refer to children as children, HUMAN BEINGS, not small, not fragile, not corruptable. It's important to be mindful of the importance of language
@sueannarca9102
11 ай бұрын
@@trent_kingyou’re wrong they are little, innocent and fragile.
@trent_king
11 ай бұрын
@@sueannarca9102 I didn't say they weren't
She has no idea how strong she is. Inspiring, beautiful, strong, courageous.
Please, you were a baby and you were innocent. Keep that monster of a dad away. You deserve to heal and to make this your past. No more. 😢❤
This is so heartbreaking. I’m so sorry she had a gross, perverted monster for a father. She’s so sweet and brave-wish her all the best 💔
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Jasmine, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
Hon, you have to turn him into the police. The people around him might believe whatever bullcrap story he tells and leave him around little kids. You _have_ to turn him in to keep other children safe
@Jesusgivesnewlife
4 ай бұрын
There's no proof as she doesn't have to go through that
@shandean8352
4 ай бұрын
@@Jesusgivesnewlife So it’s ok that she stays quiet and enables other children to be raped? Is it better to do good on the Sabbath or evil?
After I told My family I was scapegoated and ostracized. They are cowardly and cover for the perpetrator. even until today. Keep speaking your truth. You are a rock star and dealt with it more mature than most adults I know. God Bless You!
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Shannon, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
@shannon6708
8 ай бұрын
WE ARE WARRIORS!@@trevorjennings
@trevorjennings
7 ай бұрын
@@shannon6708That’s good to know you’re safe from the virus😊. Hope you’re having a nice and a wonderful day today??
If only there was a Nobel prize for “Courage, Strength, Bravery and independent badass recovery” THIS beautiful girl deserves it tenfold!!! I can hear her voice shake in the beginning, and I can also hear the absolute inspirational desire to conquer this for HER own happiness and omg jaw on the floor I’m celebrating this lovely soul! Best video I’ve ever seen, hands down. This girl is the ultimate badass!! ❤️❤️❤️
@katystanley2539
10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 🧡
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Pretty, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
This is absolutely awful. I’m so sorry as a victim of my father I totally understand. My dad died last august and none of us kids shed a tear. I’m so glad you’re healing.
As all predators. They give the blame to the victim. And justify how it’s not their fault. Well 100% the perpetrator knows what they are doing and they are grooming the child. Stand proud and know HE did it and you are the victim. You are amazing. HE is a monster. I’m sorry this happened to you. Godbless you 🙏💗💗
@angelaholmes8888
7 ай бұрын
Yes the predator will always blame the victim
Katy is truly brave to confront that monster for what he did to her and ask for an apology i know i wouldn't be able to do that
@julieoluna8887
11 ай бұрын
I find myself truly hating Men more and more.
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
I confronted my dad, he told me I had some nerve, that I made it up to make him look bad(he needs no help from me, to look/be bad!). I warned others about him. No kids for me, so he can't abuse them, too! I protect future generations from him. I am not silent, nor do I put up and shut up. He needs to apologize and mean it. No nonsense and no blaming me. He's hypocritical. He's a douchebag dad!
14:04 That's what is called a non-apology or faux-apology. Narcissistic parents do that.
@Katsumicchi
11 ай бұрын
He never even addressed what he did, just moving around it, sick
Don’t ever let this monster meet your children my love x
My dad is the same wag with the victim playing and self validation. Strength to this strong lady for sharing her story
I confronted my Father on such behavior and all he did was deny and lie. Calling me Stupid and going to all my Aunties to say I am coming up with such lies. All I can say is I was too scared to report to police because I wasn’t being supported in a way I needed. Now I am still angry, but glad I finally discarded the old bastard out of my life as well as my kids. But it still had devastating effects on me and my future family life. Hold these poedofiles accountable and putting them on the sex offenders list would be the best thing to do. Then they not only couldn’t be around our own children but others as well. It’s all such a big process and I needed such better support. But once your ready to do so, these days, the support is much more available. Back in the 70’s and 80’s I didn’t notice it, even though I was in my teens.
@annalisadelbove6133
17 күн бұрын
I am happy he is out of my life and I am sorry for my sister who is not really understanding to becareful not to leave the kids sleeping overnight at mine parebts because my mother is a shitty lady who helped him in the past. I did my best and I talked to her so this is up to her. She was warned that if one day her kids say something happened to them not come to me since she knew and didn't listen to me.
Holy buckets. My story is so much like yours! Thank you!! It's good to not be alone.
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
Yes, My dad, his brother were in on it. Dad, much more so. He said he was doing me favor. No! He still won't apologize, he blamed me, entirely. Jackass! The uncle told me a sexual joke. Their mother, when I complained, told me to "have a sense of humor" the joke wasn't funny,nor the situation. I was expected to put up and shut up. End of my relationship with those three! I felt betrayed, isolated and blamed. They didn't deserve my trust. Especially Dad, then his brother, and then their mother enabled my uncle with the comment "Have a sense of humor" Not of it was funny. They're scum! I deserve better!
My mom also wanted to give my dad partial custody, really pushed us to have a strong relationship with him because she felt we deserved a present dad. My dad was not abusive, it was nothing like that, but he was neglectful and lived with relatives who were violent and unstable. I was only seven and had to witness how my aunt almost k*lled my cousin. I didn't tell my mom because my dad and relatives told me not to. Moms out there, I know you want the best for your kids, but ask questions, be observant of everything, take your kids to therapy, never let your guard down
THAT PLAYMATE COMMENT... DEATH PENALTY
I am really sorry that he did this to you. You seem to feel guilt about it “feeling pleasurable.” Of COURSE, it did!! That is him using your own sexuality to abuse you!! Little babies touch themselves because it feels good. What he did to you was so evil. I am so so sorry. You seem like a very sweet person. You are also really brave. And, when you share these experiences, you are probably really helping someone out there who has been too afraid to talk about it.
@themindhelp9584
11 ай бұрын
little bbbies touch themselves???? wtff are you talking about? ghislaine maxwell :O goddamn
@ceceprincess4758
10 ай бұрын
Babies don't know anything about something feeling good. Smh
@brioche8123
5 ай бұрын
@@ceceprincess4758 no, it’s true, some toddlers do. But it’s never something to be abused and twisted. Their guardians should speak to the child’s pediatrician about it because that in itself can be a sign of SA.
@laibajubbein8745
2 ай бұрын
@@brioche8123no Fr I remember I since I was a toddler, I would touch myself. I had never been CSA although when I hit six, I ended up being a victim of grooming, not rape or anything actual sexual, it was still very very bad. But yeah, I had explicit dreams, really weird explicit dreams as toddler and kid. CRAZY. As I got older I was like damn, wtf. But I feel like the explicit dreams became worse after the grooming began. And I know for a fact before I was six nothing happened. It was just a weird subconscious thing.
Please take him to court! Do thus for yourself and for all girls that go through the same thing
Laws need to change seriously can't believe her Dad is free right now,he should be in prison.Even if it happened so long ago.
"the perfect playmate?!?" I think I'm going to be sick.
"Just bc they are your family doesn't mean you have to have a relationship with them" don't be afraid to confide in family friends..."speak out its not your fault"
OMG so many passive aggressive statements in that letter!!!! What a Narcissist. Girl, you are incredible. big ole hug
He should not meet your children even if he apologizes to you. He should be treated like the predator he is.
@jaddek.astrie3071
5 ай бұрын
He probably did this to other children.
I am shaking. I have experience incest since the age of 9 til 24 by my brother. He molested me, made me kiss him, and release himself onto my body. And I never gotten a formal sorry. The last time it was really brought up is when he threw me in the streets that could had cars coming. He told me that he was molested and that is why he did whatever he did to me. However, although the physically abuse stopped, the verbal and controlling aspect didn’t. I wish I gotten a four page letter of an apology just to really try to understand why I suffered for so long and or his mentality. Not saying the letter would have help but I got nothing to show for my pain and I never will since he died in 2020. I never told our mom (who also died in 2019)cause I was scared of my brother and my mother. Our godmother caught him one time when I was 10 and he was 17 but she blame me and told me I should say “no” like it was ever that easy. He didn’t get any lectures….I didn’t want to say anything cause I didn’t want to break up my little family (mom and him) and I still love him and he was still in my life….I really wish I had some closure but I never will now. I am 33 and it still affects me. It is just not fair.
@jooliagoolia9959
11 ай бұрын
Big hugs and you are stronger than you know! I finally got rid of my brother who I didn't realize was mentally abusing me even though the other had stopped many years ago. Removing any caustic person or thing from our lives is essential to our health mental, physical and spiritual. It's one of the hardest things I have ever done and I've done really hard things. It does take 2-4 years once the abuse has stopped for our brains to be able to start processing healing from it. I found writing it all down as needed, podcasts and audiobooks really helpful. 🌈 💜 🌈 You go this. It's his shame and his sadness. He's a big baby parading as a grown up and you are truly a grown up.
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
I am so so sorry you went through all of that 😔💛
@John-ls4xh
11 ай бұрын
Jesus loves you and wants to heal you.
@eleanor_m355
11 ай бұрын
People who victim blame annoy the shit out of me. That is NEVER okay! Your godmother doesn't sound like a great person in my opinion. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
@shirleyoutlaw1115
11 ай бұрын
I hope you healing journey can be empowering. Even though full Justice did not happen, you are a precious gemstone being revealed. Please seek counseling, therapy. Being taken advantage of by a family member and then Godmother dismissing it all is just what a lot of families do. I experienced such a family too. But my eternal Father is my real father in Heaven. He comforts me. I hope you can find what you need to start healing ❤️🩹
I would never let him near me or my kids ever again
You are a beautiful person. None of this was your fault. You survived and are helping others. That is a true hero🌺 I hope that you continue to heal. You are a precious soul💯
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Lisa, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
After that letter, I would never speak another word to him.
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Gennie, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
I’m so sorry about all those things that happened to you. It is NOT your fault.
It is NEVER EVER the child's fault. These adults are the bravest people I know. And their stories do so much for awareness and to stop this adhorrent cruelty to children who CANNOT consent. May these people find their empowerment and peace..They deserve every happiness
You are very brave Katy, I commend for telling your story and I would like you to know that you have helped this 61 year old grandma very much. I am needing to learn how to love myself and through your story and the love that you have for yourself to stand up for yourself you have given me hope through your strength. Keep up the great work that you are doing for you. Thank you 🥰🥰🥰
What a beautiful, strong, smart, young woman. Has she written a book? What she has described so far could really be a movie. This isn't just a horrible crime, it affects so much of the victim's life and the choices they make. She is a great role model for survivors.
@katystanley2539
9 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 💛
That so-called father took gaslighting to a whole new level.
I feel for you! I treat my father the same way and he didn't even "SA" me, he abused me in a narcissistic neglectful way and he won't take any accountability for it, he "doesn't remember"! Anything that inconveniences his view of himself. I wish you all the best!
Let’s keep using soul sister and make it a more regularly used term for the women in our lives who see us and take care of us ❤
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Jeanette, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
So much pain in your voice, it is not your fault. I think you are still healing.
I had to rewind a couple of times just to make sure I heard everything correctly - the dad’s responses baffled me
You are incredibly strong, Katy! Your strength really is incredible. Wishing you so much future happiness and peace sister
You’re a beautiful woman, inside and out.. thank you for sharing this…❤
Honey, you are beautiful inside and out. And you will find out how strong and loved you are.
@katystanley2539
17 күн бұрын
Thank you 💛
My father whom I had not spoken to in years called me and said he didn’t think he had long to live and wanted to ask for my forgiveness. He died - so I heard - 4 months later. Every once in a while he would get religion or a flash of something like conscience and ask for forgiveness. I was always gracious and kind though he was never finished being a molester. I have tried to forgive because those were his demons at work. But like the Scottish proverb goes.. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastards name. He was handsome, college educated, WW2 pilot and an enemy I wish I could forget. It took me years to be comfortable knowing God is my Father. A word I had trouble believing - a Father really cared. I feel the pain of these women who tell their stories. I pray they find peace. It was his actions that put deep scars on my soul and future. He never had the courage or fortitude to slay his demons. I think they ate him alive.
@ceemoney5309
11 ай бұрын
He’s not God don’t ever disrespect God
@halgaucher6730
11 ай бұрын
@@ceemoney5309 she means her real father is the Lord, not her abuser. Your nastiness is unnecessary.
@halgaucher6730
11 ай бұрын
Your story resonates deeply with me. I wish the absolute best for you.
@lisajohnson4744
11 ай бұрын
@@artisthusnatalal3099blah blah blah blah blahb
@lisajohnson4744
11 ай бұрын
@myrenaissance I totally understand about struggling with the idea of God as Father. It took me a long time to be able to see that father should mean love and not fear or abandonment. ❤
Your awesome and so right about keeping your father away from children. No matter what they say, never trust them again!
Unfortunately this world is full of men like this. It’s a very sad world
You are SO brave to talk about it and SO compassionate to have not charging your narcissistic father, after all. He must be in jail...
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Anita, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
Please don't expose your kids to him. He needs to be reported. Most likely there are other victims. Thinking it's only you is another symptom of self blame.
He should be locked up. He will always be a danger to children. I wish you happiness and peace for the future.
Thank you for your bravery in speaking about this. Fellow CSA survivor.
i want to hug young katy so so bad 😔 seeing those photos broke my heart, 2023 katy too, my stepdad molested me for years so i 100% understand your pain ☹️❤
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
Sending you so much love 🧡🧡
I cannot believe that’s what he said, that’s disgusting. I’m so sorry you went through this.
Congratulations! You are free from a very sick toxic individual . Stay strong and protect yourself and those you love. ❤
So pure. And brave.
I strongly relate to your story; no physical abuse, happening at such a young age, not realizing until I was older, need for validation by guys.
Thank you for sharing your truth. I know something happened to me, but I am afraid to go to therapy, I'm afraid of what I will find out. I'll be 60 in a few months, and I don't think I will cope with everything that will come out, so I'm choosing to leave it behind me, and live my truth.
@margaretgarana911
11 ай бұрын
You do whatever makes you happy.
I felt her pain shes so strong
You were just a child and it’s was not your fault . Thank you for speaking out
You're not alone sister. YOU are a Survivor. He's a POS coward! That was NOT an apology. You are Inspiring, Articulate and Brave. YOU are responsible for NONE of the sexual abuse, he's responsible for Everything. You are not responsible and you deserve justice. Speak your truth! You are Amazing.
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Michele, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
@katystanley2539
5 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 🧡🧡
Katy, your transparency is your SUPERPOWER! Thank you for sharing the truth to help others! Heal well! 🙏🕊️
You are so brave. I wish your father served time for his crime against you. Hopefully he doesn’t have access to other children.
I’m sorry. I only remember bits and pieces of what happened with me and my father. He died when I was 13, and I hate that I can’t confront him about it to know what all happened. Im sorry this happened to you.
The fact that on the way to the airport she didn't hit the buckle on his seatbelt and drive into a bridge pillar. You have more restraint than I sweet young lady.
You are so smart and articulate, you really need to be a counselor or public speaker on behalf of victims of CSA. You have a natural gift!
Bless you, young lady. You are strong and beautiful.
So sorry this happened to you beautiful lady 😢
Megyn Kelly’s podcast just did a tell-all about the Jared Fogle (the subway guy) scandal and he mapped out the grooming process and showing a child private areas / changing in front of a child / doing something to expose themselves to the minor is a part of the process. I was recently wearing sweatpants and my best friend’s 5-year old literally just reached over and poked my private area asking “what’s that?” I calmly let her know that was not appropriate to touch that area on an adult and no adult can touch you there. Her mom was sitting right across the room and said “can you imagine the amount of ppl who take something like that as an opportunity?” It’s disgusting that adults even have these thoughts but some of the words he said to you in his “apology” are classic predator Narcissist behavior. And I don’t throw that word around a lot. He could have begged your forgiveness, went to family counseling w you, went to a treatment center that had a family reunification focus, soooo many things to prove to you his remorse and understanding that there were zero excuses and zero accountability on your part AS A CHILD. He could have offered to pay for all your own therapy and be included. Good for you for putting that sturdy wall up. I believe this will be a lifelong process for you and you already are so intelligent in your search for clarity and closure. I know you can continue to heal and i pray one day this has no power whatsoever over you. Sending so much love and admiration for your strength and courage !!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@katystanley2539
9 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 🧡🧡
You are so incredible brave. Your father is such an A!!!!!!
I really needed to hear someone say that just because they are a family member doesn't mean I have to protect them. Thank you
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
🧡🧡
@jackilynpyzocha662
3 ай бұрын
Dad expects me to be silent to protect him. I'm not silent. I warn others. Too bad for him!
@windwhisprz
3 ай бұрын
@@jackilynpyzocha662 good call! Take care of yourself and loved ones 💚💚💚
Never let him meet your children! They will become “GREAT” playmates! He’s not admitting because he knows his confession could get him prison time! Sorry for your dad violating you. That’s not what dads do!
I’m so so so sorry what you lived through. You are an incredibly strong person. I hope that monster rots in hell and he has the worst life imaginable. I pray that you heal from your inflictions and find peace and joy and live your full life as you deserve.
thank you so fucking much - your courage for evolving yourself and speaking truth is beyond admirable. you are amazing.
Thank you for speaking up and encouraging others to do the same. Pls everyone speak up. I am now 60 and just finding my voice now. So sad I had to wait so long.
I understand you have trauma but sis, you are tripping for asking for an apology to keep him in your life. Ask for the apology then cut that idiot off! We have to stop begging people to stay in our lives when they show us who they are!
@Theruccibanks
Ай бұрын
Like ew 😢she’s definitely messed up in the head from this he’s a predator and when he said she’s the perfect play mate eww im disgusted you never ask for a apology from the person who did you wrong and u will never be in my kids life period she’s out of her mind
You did an amazing job. You are so incredibly brave and I’m certain you saved that granddaughter! So thankful for you and your bravery. Even one child saved is the biggest thing anyone can do in their life and you’re helping so many more by using your voice, giving all survivors a voice. ❤️
You are a beautiful, insightful young lady. Bless you for learning to heal yourself now.
Well done! You are very brave to confront your father like that. I think you've played it as well as you possibly could of. All the best in the future.
You are not alone. I admire the strength you have to tell your story in hopes of saving others.❤❤❤❤❤
Katy’s father makes my skin crawl across the room. She never deserved to have a family member like this!
Breaks my heart all the stories you are a beautiful strong young woman wish you all the best from 🇬🇧
@trevorjennings
8 ай бұрын
Hello Chrissy, how are you doing today, hope you’re fine and safe from the COVID-19 virus??
U now believe in yourself n that's something that man will never know. Believing in yourself is your power. Thanku for your truth. U r an Amazing Amazon who deserves a future worthy of your love.❤
My heart breaks that your dad put you through this horrific behavior..Thank you for sharing your story.I pray for continued healing over your life Katy🤗🙏❤️🙏
@katystanley2539
11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 🧡
It’s so hard to talk about these things. I’m proud of you for speaking it bc it can help you heal and help others like me not feel so alone. ❤
I went through the same and understand your pain 💔 I've been diagnosed with Depression/Anxiety and PTSD. I was molest by my Dad and my mom telling me I ask for it!! And yes it feels good to talk about it. Thanks for sharing your story.