Yoooo!

All I am hearing is, you went through puberty (sin of the flesh and liked getting high which DOES NOT make you a drug addict) and was made to feel guilty about all of it by the same people who get to claim that they can save you. If eating pork was a sin and you are feeling bad because you really like the taste of bacon, feeling relief because the same people that make you feel bad for eating bacon say they forgive you, is not healthy. It's a toxic relationship. It's the same feeling many wives who are beaten have towards their aggressors. You're only feeling guilty because you were hanging out with people with "holier than thou" attitude who I guarantee did the same thing as you if not worse, only they didn't get caught. Bring me anyone over the age of 20 that claims he has never masturbated and I present to you an asexual, a liar or someone that even you would consider unsettlingly brainwashed. Like a pastor would ask that person to drink cyanide laced Kool Aid and they would do it knowingly or someone that has been homeschooled by overtly religious parents and have never seen the outside world. The first situation is nothing of virtue, they are simply biologically uninterested, second well is a liar and the third situation is not someone you want to be. Most people encouraging you to have blind faith is so that they can act as sinful as they want while you are blind to it.