100 Questions to Ask on First Date: www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/ctmc/mag/100-questions-date

To me it was always the fact that I never get tired of that person no matter how much time I spend with him the second he leaves I miss him. ☺️

@empresslyn5614

4 жыл бұрын

☺😃😃

I ask myself : " Am I safe with him? "

@user-iv2br9so2l

3 жыл бұрын

Why it’s so funny in a way 😂

@Ag.317

3 жыл бұрын

Very important, to be safe.

@MuseSunday

3 жыл бұрын

I feel so safe with him

@evamarek5205

2 жыл бұрын

@@MuseSunday Same here.

@daltonlafitte2312

2 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂

It was when I saw how kind my now husband was to everyone he met. Whether it was someone struggling with a stroller, a waitress, holding a door open for someone, seeing him go out of his way to do his best to help his friends & family in any situation, even if it put things out for him. And then ultimately the kindness he showed me that let me see his true spirit as a person from day one until now. I always am grateful for my blessings. I met a truly good person with a good pure heart, and now he has mine wholly.

@dellchica2373

5 жыл бұрын

Sheila Blake awwww

I found my 'one' 💓. When we first met, after we talked for a couple months, it was an immediate feeling of 'knowing this man forever' and he felt like 'home'. All the important conversations had already happened. We knew we were on the same page with matching expectations, values, morals, etc. And even though he was a complete stranger, I felt 100% safe with him. At the end of our first date he said this and I knew he was a real man. He said, I want to ask you a favor. Promise me you'll always tell me what you are thinking and feeling, and if I say or do something that upsets you, cause I don't want to loose you over something stupid'. WOW.....❤

@ojum7143

8 ай бұрын

Mine also hv said if any thing makes me angry please tell ..I don't want to loose you ..please don't leave ❤I love him too❤

@flowerpie6107

7 ай бұрын

I also have an online friend. Yes he is stranger but I no longer have a feeling of strangers with him. But I can't figure out if he is the one. Because he never abuses me, never taunts me, never hurts me emotionally, there is much more i can say about him. I literally have talked or have never met a guy who has this much patience with me. We haven't met yet but if it's written for us it will happen. Idk what happens next but hope for the best

@rezotydnic

7 ай бұрын

@flowerpie6107 all the best wishes to you on the journey to find true love. After 7 years for me, and no progression in that relationship, I am walking away from it. He's a good man but at a standstill. He was ruined, imho, by a cheating wife who got pregnant by someone else, and he can't get over it. I love him but it apparently isn't the right time and place for us.

@laurahero8778

7 ай бұрын

@@rezotydnicSorry for that experience but at least you are still being wise. He may be the one but there are many fish in the sea. Just don’t be the chaser which you aren’t I’m feeling, let them one chase you. He’ll come!

@rezotydnic

7 ай бұрын

@laurahero8778 thank you for your kind words. I have written down my feelings, thoughts, and organized them in my head, to have a talk with him. I will talk with him and tell him how I feel. And I will give him 2 weeks to think about it all and get back to me with his answer. He's either all in or not. At our ages, 60's, love is rare, and not just around the corner. But if he decides to not be all, I'm open to meeting 'the right one'. If he exists.

When I met my husband, I thought he didn't like me but it turned out he was shy. As we became closer and got to know each other better, there was an absence of "red flags", and I would just spontaneously smile at the thought of being with him. From the very start we could just be together in companionable silence. One day I just realized that I had stopped looking, that my natural restlessness and curiosity for something "new" was gone.

@imwatching2960

3 жыл бұрын

This is great

@savvydavvy3463

3 жыл бұрын

That's what I want 😊

My Dating Criteria (not just for the 1st date but in general): RESPECTFUL: Is he affectionate but also respectful of my physical boundaries and chivalrous throughout the date? Non-sexual physical touch is important if that’s your love language. ENGAGING PERSONALITY: Is he engaging and genuinely interested in getting to know me as a person by asking questions? Extroverts tend to be great at this. CONSISTENT COMMUNICATOR: Is he consistent in his communication and shows me through his actions that he wants to progress the relationship forward? Consistency builds trust. Disappearing without a reason or not being honest shows immaturity and poor communications skills. SENSE OF HUMOR: Can he make me laugh? Being able to laugh like best friends is so important! AMBITION: Is he goal-oriented? Does he have passions/hobbies that he loves? I can’t be with someone who is looking for me to complete him or doesn’t have his life together. ADVENTUROUS & POSITIVE SPIRIT: Does he have a zest for life? Being able to have fun in any situation makes a great life partner.

@jasmineelfiky1410

5 жыл бұрын

Finally I found an interpretation to my feelings and deep thoughts Thank you ❤

@redpurple_ua

3 жыл бұрын

Wow, I love this!! Thank you!😍😍😍

@bluebellcrushedvelvet

2 жыл бұрын

Amazing set of lists!! I so agree with you!! And I personally so agree with a sense of humor!! Coz ladies, isn't it just a panty dropper if the guy can make us laugh so so good??! Like truly laugh! From the heart and stomach! And we feel so free doing it! It's so exhilarating and satisfying!! I think for me a real fantastic sense of humor can be everything in a relationship for me! A deal deal breaker if they don't!! Coz I want to laugh with him all the way to my 70's and 80's!!! And he has to trigger my mind! Fascinate me with how he thinks, he's philosophy and thinking! That is also another way to a woman's heart!

@moanapooh9726

2 жыл бұрын

@@bluebellcrushedvelvet YESSS PREACHHHHHH. LIKE UU JUST KEEP LOVING THEM MORE AND MORE

@brucebanner1780

2 жыл бұрын

Aa a men I approve this

When I met him he was nice enough, but nothing outstanding. He came to play RISK every weekend, and so did I. Before we knew it I was going as much to enjoy his company as to enjoy the group play. We shared 34 years before his death. It was definitely the way most long-term relationships go, we grew together over months of laughter. I like this question.

@jeanicemiller1103

6 жыл бұрын

Sorry for your loss Susan. So glad you were able to share the 34 years together.

@SC-pp6gt

4 жыл бұрын

I'm so sorry for your loss Susan. This hurts I know.. Hope you are taking care. xx

@karenokane7376

3 жыл бұрын

Sorry to hear of your loss.

@mariahconklin4150

2 жыл бұрын

I’m going through the same thing all we do is laugh together me more then him. I really like him a lot. 😊😄

@mariahconklin4150

2 жыл бұрын

I feel like every date is just so different he’s so different on each date. Idk if that makes sense

Trust your gut and keep asking your gut. Your gut and intuition will never fail you if you truly listen.

In my previous relationships I didn’t have this strong feeling that “WE never will be apart”, I never question anything with him. It’s just goes smoothly right. Every time I tell myself “what if something goes wrong” my inner voice tells me “it won’t”. I’ve never had this feeling before, never been so confident about my relationship.

Its so easy being with him. So natural. I want to spend time with him, learn every single thing about him. Have a family with him. He's so supportive, so sweet makes me feel like im the best thing thats happened to him. Makes me feel complete. If he's not the one then ill never find it

I knew he was the one when every time we were together there was calm, peace, joy and happiness - EVERYTHING was easy :) When we were apart, the yearning to see his eyes smile and to feel his touch was still significant that i felt deep in my soul we were meant to be

The guy I’m dating now for about 9 months now says he new I was the one from the moment we met.... for me, hard to believe,but what do I know. For me with him was that sense of comfortable, openness, peacefulness and this crazy I can’t breathe feeling when he was around. He still gives me flutters when I hear his voice or know he is coming near. It keeps growing still....

@barbaramay3539

3 жыл бұрын

That's how it should be..😃👍

I know when I'm with a potential long term relationship when he feels like home to me, calmness and peacefulness every time we meet.

When their soul is the reflection of yours, you just know

@billmcdowell3644

5 жыл бұрын

Am I a reflection of your soul beautiful

@goldenshepardgwen166

2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely ❤️

@destinychild4659

2 жыл бұрын

I love that! 😍

For me I was very intimidated by him at first because he was so successful and handsome. Out of my league, but I always wanted to know what made him tick even though I felt lame next to him. I went in with an attitude of "we wont last anyways..might as well have fun" turns out hes kind, deep, respectful, honest and we share the same values. Now I know he felt the same way about me and was just as nervous...hes the one.

There was an instant electrical pull between us and honestly he is muscular and well built, but what blew me away were his eyes and smile. After that moment we were inseparable. We did have to work to keep our love growing though but we have not regretted one disagreement or sacrifice we have made. Love is a beautiful thing when effort is placed into it.

The relationship is effortless, peaceful and kinda magical. I feel lucky...like he's my knight in shinning armor or like I'm in some kind of fairytale..almost a year and we're still on the honey moon stage, I want this honey moon stage to last our whole life... serious lol thank you for these videos, love your channel ❤️

There is an amazing energy about him and us. We were set up by a friend and we lived in 2 different parts of the world. Yet when we met it was like ive known him before and there was an ease about us and i dont remember laughing so much around any other man. I felt safe, comfortable and loved. He felt the same. And all of these are still present even when things are rocky like one of us is having a bad day and is pouring our heart out. We took it slow by using the distance to really get to know one another. We looked forward to sharing our day and we never felt the distance with the quality of communication we have and openness. Even when we were out with friends, we would facetime to introduce and share what we're doing. I guess we were just happy to be in each other's life.

Shared values, friendship, feeling like I have come home, feeling valued, respected, and that he makes time for me. I also need him to be someone I can really have great conversations with, that I really like who he is, that I can say I respect and admire and value. He has to be someone who makes time for me and is honest and transparent about what he is going and eventually someone who shares his goals, dreams and ideas for the future

You're right about the feeling of peace. Wanting to learn more to add to the passion. Thanks for clarifying.

Wonderful Question, also EASY, PEACEFUL, and POSITIVE. I agree on both the feminine and masculine aspect -a full 360 degrees of understanding. ThankU

The first time I met my fiance was when I got a job in a restaurant where he worked. He was very funny until at one point, I was thinking to myself "Man, I wonder what kind of woman will be with him in the future?" and it turns out after 3 months knowing each other, we decided to go out. Its all because I fall for his way of protecting me silently.. like he accompanied me late night until my dad came to pick me up when our other colleagues already went home, the way he notices that I was crying when no one realized that, his way of advising me without making me feel embarrassed, the way he remembers those little things, his sense of humor, and most importantly, the way he acts naturally around his family even when I am in front of him.

I have been dating a widower for 2 months. His wife passed 9 months ago. Things are going slow per the boundaries we both set. I knew he was really someone I wanted to be my second chance forever because we matched in values, beliefs, and faith. We clicked on all aspects of everything and the deal breakers I had were fine with him...he met them with respect as I did his.

Great advice! That's how I found my guy. I didn't think I was ready to start dating again, but it was so easy with him. I knew after talking with him for 45 minutes, that I wanted to get to know him better. It's the best decision I could have made.

Thank you so much Matt! I appriciate your hardwork!

The question you make here is absolutely amazing! Our instinct moves us and deep inside we feel that something special captivates us to go forward. Then will come other stages to end us stay tuned and energized. Thank you!

Nice way of looking at it ! Would I like to see them one more time ! Thanks Mat !

He was a bit shy, nervous and awkward when we had our first date. He wanted to hold my hand but didn't dare to, he was rambling a lot, the moment he asked if it would be inappropriate to kiss me I knew I liked him!!! He was so nice, kind, thoughtful, considerate, manly and so much more. He is PERFECT!

Tanks again for the advice! That sense of peace is very important.

This video was so important for me to see right now. Thank you Mr. Mathew Boggs!

Simple, straight and beautifully explained. 👍🙏

I have to establish a friendship with them first. I actually wrote down in detail what I'd want in a life partner and how our relationship would be. I look for open communication (Can I be myself and talk about most things without feeling judged? Can I discuss tougher issues or disagree without him getting upset?), consistency in words and actions (Does he follow through with what he says on a consistent basis?), mental stimulation (Can he stimulate me with deep conversation?), and personal freedom (Is he domineering or views me as inferior to him or does he respect that we're our own persons that will contribute and complement each other's lives?. That said, it definitely takes me longer to determine if he's the one. I'm currently with someone and it's going well so far. 😊💏

@mwerries

6 жыл бұрын

Love all of these things. I'm adding them to my list too.

@MichaelGordonFinance

6 жыл бұрын

I think it is a good idea to have a friendship first as that allows for the relationship to work a lot more naturally.

@SuraDoes

8 ай бұрын

this is literally exactly what I am looking for. Are you me? 🤯

My parents say (they have been together for 50 years), they knew because they couldn’t live without each other. They didn’t get along perfectly, my dad can be arrogant, my mom doesn’t let stuff go, neither of them is perfect.

Thank you matt. Your advise, and understanding, helped me rekindle my marriage.

Such a good, valid, relevant video - thumbs up

A connection to start, then effort, respect..... and opening up to each other over time

Thank you Matt. That’s a great way to approach things. Trying to decide if you can live with a person after a date isn’t working for me. This seems like a much better approach!

I have two criteria, first do they make me laugh if they do then I definitely want to see them that second time. My next important criteria not only do I want to go to sleep with them but do I want to wake up with them the next morning and many mornings after that. If I can see myself waking up next to that person time and time again then I know they're the one.

Great video Mat! Thanks. I think you're right. So important that it feels easy and peaceful being with that person before leaning in. Onwards and upwards on my own journey in finding the one!?

Thank you for pointing out that most people don't know right away. Popular belief is that it's some magical epiphany for the majority and that can be misleading for those of us still looking. After several relationship mishaps, I'm cautious and I can't get my hopes up about something like marriage early on (less than a year).

Mat Boggs you just made a point which instantly, directly connects with solution of my problem. You are awesome :)

Love the comment section. So many stories of 'the ones'! ❤️

wow... i needed to hear that right now... i've been so frustrated with dating. that 100% helped me. Thank you.

Thanks Matt, I needed to watch this video.

Thanks for all youre tips 👍🍀

I feel it’s when you are talking to your best friend and you are physically attracted to that person.

I agree with Noga. For me when I had found the one it was as if someone flicked a switch and meeting him it felt like I had been hit by a ton of bricks...all over. I was dizzy. But getting to know him helped of course and I fell in love with him even more. True love came at a slower pace.

I have to feel the lightness ... from the beginning. It has to be a feeling of friendship, if i don't feel it then i can't relax and it gets exhausting ... in such a condition I can't be me.

Thank you for this!!!💕

I like this!!! Yes so much better less pressure

Oh My God Matt, this video came to me at the right time. I am actually confused, because the guy is so sweet and understanding but I don't get whether I like him as a friend or more. Maybe it's the matter of slow progression as you mentioned. Thank you. At least, it's given me some clarity.

Thank you for such grounded, counter-cultural advice. There is so much out there about how it should feel like, which can discourage someone from moving forward with a person who could be such a great partner. I really value this perspective and it brought me a lot of peace :)

For me, I don't focus on "the one" beyond is he the one for the moment and is the connection fostering love and growth. And when it doesn't or if it doesn't, I'll be great either way

ur channel is the best..big hiii for u from iraq

That was very helpful

Positivity, educative conversation

I check his core values as a person. How he thinks and treats relationships around him and how he feels about people in his life. That gives me an idea whether that person is for me or not. Prioritizing is a another aspect. If the person is ambitious and also family oriented, does he makes special efforts to enjoy and live life at his own terms as well. Sense of humor - getting your point across in a subtle and non-sarcastic way. Whether I am able to enjoy small things in life and he is able to appreciate and give me space to enjoy moments without judging.

Having met the man I'm going to marry on line.... I took my time, even before one on one meeting in person. I learned who he was from his beliefs, his experiences. Than, when meeting, as we got to know each other, I compared the original conversations to see if this person was that person. We were friends first, sex didn't happen out of the shoot, not that I didn't want it too. Lol. Go slow, be honest with yourself. I'm a total Romantic, but so is my guy. Count your blessings and have a positive attitude too!

@MichaelGordonFinance

6 жыл бұрын

Wow, that is a great story, Linda. Thanks for sharing! A lot more people will be meeting their true love online in the future.

Omg!!!! Makes so much sense!!!!!!

Thank you, Matt!!! 💗💖💕💛😁😁😁😍😍😍

When I dated (many years ago) I would look for someone who would make a good husband and father for my future children. He needed to be a kind, and caring person that is trustworthy. I am so blessed because we just cerebrated our 39th anniversary .

Before I met him I had a dream about him. Then he turned up in my driveway buying something from me . I knew right away as soon as I looked into his eyes.instant recognition..I am very comfortable with him.everythi g just flows beautiful. We can be ourselves around each other. I think I can say he's the love of my life.

Based on my experience. You will know that he/she is the one when everything seems effortless. Effortless meaning, you don’t have to sell yourself short, read between the lines, wait in vain, feeling clueless, feeling used, hanging, stressed out so on and so forth. If she/he is the one everything will go smoothly, you’ll feel very connected, organic feelings arise, you meet half way and most importantly you feel genuinely happy & contented. ☝️💯 Thanks Matt, you have no idea how thankful I am for all your videos. It changed my life, mind set & my love life is progressing. I hope you’re planning to come visit Philippines & do some love/life couching seminar here. God bless you & your awesome family! ☺️

@redpurple_ua

3 жыл бұрын

That's a nice comment. Thank you so much! I'm adding this to my list!

@youngestkid2674

11 ай бұрын

Yes, easy like breathing. :D

Thank you Math💐

Thank you for moving the frame...😀 now I can't focus on the message. 🙌

Peace and positivity are the good signs.

Same thing, how do I feel and do I look forward to seeing him again.

Thank you ...

To me it's always does he make me laugh, and when something bad happens, do I want to pick up the phone and call him?

For me, it was “so I see them positively impacted my future” and “could I see myself being happy with them in 50 years”

When I first met him I didn’t know he was the one right away. He wore me down, pursued me and told me that this connection we have could be explored any way we want it, so let’s give it a go. At first I was terrified and wasn’t ready for anything serious. After coming from a emotional abusive relationship I didn’t see myself giving parts of myself to anyone. Eventually his charmed worked. It took a few hangouts before I realized I like how safe, comfortable and at ease I am with myself. He has comforted my fears, given me reassurance of who I am as a person, makes me feel validated and accepted where i don’t have to hide parts of myself to be accepted - everything. You know he’s the one when everything you knew about love was wrong.

To me I have to feel calm and secure around a person and I have to be sure I'm also the one to bring peace to him. Another thing is, if he's treating me nice and has patience and understanding for me. All that after I established that we are compatible when it comes to values and outlook for the future that is.

I never had criteria that worked out until now. I wanted someone to be the patriarch in our family. It was something we built on together. Having feelings of warmth is my best indicator. I think having other couples we get along with together helps grow our peacefulness together.

Sometime you just see someone and something deep down tell you is the right person,but to me is just a crush and nothing more,the one way to know is time,spending time together

He and I just over look the fact that we're both disabled. We treat one another like we're not special. We don't want to be treated like we're fragile.

likemindedness and connection

Yes I'm comfortable with him, I take about anything

For me I wasn't looking. Over the years the more I thought about it the worse it'd be. It took 45 yrs and it was a very slow unforced thing and I am speechless. I never thought this could happen to me. I agree 💯 about peace and positivity When it comes naturally and easy it's so amazing beyond words❤️

I would say someone who's nice , has a positive outlook on life without being into the "hyper positivity" nonsense , we can have a good laugh and fun together ,also important if he's respectful ...

Peace and Positivity...

When we were seating next to eachother, I felt this amazing peace filling my heart, I knew that this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, but... two years on and I am in a loving relationship with a different man, how's that possible?

Peace and contentment just being comfortable around them

Thanks, I'll be using that one!

First criteria he spents time with me and my second he makes me laugh. I'm still with him counting five years now. 👪👪💪👪

1) Do I feel like this person has my back? 2) Is he honest?

Love this! Thank you Mat!

I just feel it in my intuition, I think.. but I like the version of those couples you interviewed that it should be in a slow progression. Thanks for the advice that you said, "do I want to see that person one more time?" I like that. Though I wanted to see that person one more time, that person didn't want to see me. So, I am telling myself, "well...move on" Thanks Matt.

Do we fill each other's eyes? When I think of him, is it nice and comforting? When I see him again, do I smile all over? Is every cell of me happy when I'm with him?

Criteria for me is when you just know it ...I believe in love at 1st sight. So you feel it when feels like have like a strange but strong feeling or when you feel you have butterflies in your stomach as they say !!

I always want to see him one more time and a lot of the times I do feel at peace with him. He feel like he can tell me anything I know he does because he told me that and I feel safe with him.

how do I feel when we are walking together simply talking, in our casual clothes while eating the most cheapest ice cream.

He said”because I care about you ❤️

I'm think it's been about to talk to them about any thing..Being together able to laugh together .

I knew she was the one when I said something really stupid in an email. After I sent it, I felt really foolish and was expecting to be teased. Instead she wrote back something funny and sweet. I replied thank you for not teasing me. When she said I'll never tease you, but always laugh with you - I knew.

I feel it in my soul

Thanks Matt. I found my person. We're like Lay's chips, we can't just stop at one more time. It just keeps going and going.

I ask myself: is he the person I want to be stuck with on an unhabited island? For me this works cause it takes out all the shallow considerations

For me, If I really like someone....of course no one is perfect and I understand that. So I pick the flaw or thing about them thats not necessarily my favorite aspect and I ask myself. "Is this something Im ok with? Can I spend 50 yrs with this quality or feature" because changing someone is absolutely not the answer, nagging about it for 50 yrs is obviously not the answer. Acceptance is the answer. Is it a quality or cork that you accept about them and can find enduring. If you think "oh my god, 50 yrs of his smoking, his talking with food in his mouth, his snoring, his job jumping or always being late will drive me mad" then its a no. Time to move on. Im not saying I look for flaws, as you spend time together you will see their strength or weakness. When you see it. Ask your self, would I be ok with this for the rest of my life?

@keishakiger8541

Жыл бұрын

I like this idea

I found the one - and felt it right away - unfortunately, he's been with someone for 8 years, not married, but living with. We see each other every day at work, and we eat lunch together, go to work events and check in with each other all the time, never crossing the line. I think he thinks of me as a friend, so I'll take what I can get for now, until he realizes what I already know...