Most native wakes last several days. You'll see the body in an open casket and all around it are the people who loved them and they are eating sandwiches, playing poker, making jokes, laughing, crying, and everything. Outsiders will see photos from wakes or even attend wakes and think everyone is being rude or thing they don't care about the person who died but it's the opposite. They tell stories about the dead, they all grief in their own way. When one of my good friends died recently we spent the night laughing telling stories of all the weird things he would do to annoy us. It was his sense of humor, I can't think back to a time I spent with them and not crack a smile. That's my way of dealing with the grief. Everyone has their own and we shouldn't judge people on what we perceive as not being sad enough. And we shouldn't judge ourselves.

amazing advice as per usual. My condolences to the girl

okay first off, my condolences to the sender of that email. secondly, I recommended this video to a friend after watching it. It helped us both immensely as we were both going through similar situations and somehow kinda bonded more over this and other videos of yours. And for that, Matt, I'd just like to thank you for doing what you do and making people happier with awesome advice. So thank you matt, thank you so so much

i'm just gonna be honest, watching these videos makes me choke up even if i dont directly relate because you give off a feeling that you care, i suppose it's the way you speak but nonetheless i really appreciate what you try to do for people.

Very helpful advice, I'm sure it was greatly appreciated

I lost my dad a couple weeks ago in a car accident and this video really helped. Thank you

Hi Matt, I watch you on sf which brought me here. I need this advice today. I am 24, and since 09 I have lost my best friend, in my own home (I found his body), from some weird suspicious overdose, I didn't even know he was using. I lost my big from bbbs who I had been close to since I was 14 after she beat breastfeeding cancer they found surprise cancer all over her body, they gave her 2 years, she died two months later. And last year in March I lost my father to surprise cancer. They gave him 5 years, he was dead within 3 weeks. I do not feel like I ever grieved properly, I'm just so numb. I made a promise not to cut when my sister died and with the other things I've been through that I didn't cut I am proud of, and ashamed of the few slip ups over what I see now as dumb reasons compared to other times I chose not to. I am trying to move forward but I think because I'm still carrying my grief from all their deaths over this almost 6 years. I haven't grieved properly. I have not pushed away the desire to be happy, but maybe making a list and trying to follow your advice could help. I really needed these words today and I am so appreciative that you posted this when you did. if you see this and have more to add, please let me know. Thank you again. -Angel

My best friend also passed about one week ago. The worst part is that his funeral is tomorrow and I can't go because it is in an entirely different country. I just wish that I could talk to him one last time.

@TheAngryDwarfff

8 жыл бұрын

no matter what you believe in after death, everytime you think about that person, think 'i need to tell him/her this really important information' you already have. they already know. you carry those memories of them wherever you go, whatever you do. i know it sounds dumb as hell, but it helped me, i hope it helps you. good luck in life my friend

@goldie0169

8 жыл бұрын

+Gauthier Hebert You can have your own funeral for him at home. It doesn't have to be anything big, but you can create some kind of ritual to honour his passing and your time together. You could write down some of your favourite memories on a piece of paper, for example, and bury them in your yard at night (or during the day, whatever) or somewhere at a time and place that means something to you (nowhere illegal, obviously) & where it wont get dug up. Write or bury anything you want and invite other friends who knew him if that feels right. Just because its not his actual body doesn't make the ritual any less meaningful - do what's meaningful to you :)

what would her friend recommend? like, im guessing, she would want to help. maybe go to one of your spots you two would go. or maybe somewhere else. i cant imagine how ... this is where I would hug you. but its the internet. :(