The first 100 people to go to blinkist.com/blaze are going to get unlimited access for one week to try it out. You’ll also get 25% off if you want the full membership.

@thatfakedrussiankid5534

3 жыл бұрын

Bissness daddy is back

@jimmiedmc1

3 жыл бұрын

You should rename the channel "allegedly"

@twocvbloke

3 жыл бұрын

Tom Scott? Yeah, I know him, he's the Badum-tish guy... :P kzread.info/dash/bejne/apmMzJtwo9fId5s.html

@Maazzzo

3 жыл бұрын

Where are the subtitles? You're usually pretty good about this, and I'm deaf, I need subs.

@pandorasbox4238

3 жыл бұрын

In most US states, you can get your learning permit at 15, and license at 16.

Only once have I had someone play a prank on me...by filling my mailbox with small rubber ducks. Turns out a friend did it to make me happy as I was having a tough week and clearly “mailbox full of small rubber duckies” was where his mind went. I was giving those ducks to people for months and still had enough to play with in the bath.

@victoriashevlin8587

3 жыл бұрын

That's weirdly sweet.

@CharlesEros1

Жыл бұрын

So what your saying is it's odd.... But it worked 🥳🤣👍

@jmarshal

Жыл бұрын

@@CharlesEros1 oh yeah it worked. I can vouch for filling someone’s mailbox with small rubber duckies if they’re feeling sad. Has my seal of approval.

@odinfromcentr2

Жыл бұрын

Wholesome. :3

@gabriellynch2764

Жыл бұрын

I had a friend fill my mailbox with orange ticktacs. I appreciated it.

Surely number 1 is going to be that "Prank" Simon pulled on Danny and Sam with the basement? 😅🤣

@GeorgiaOverdrive

3 жыл бұрын

I think you mean Sam?

@IntrepidFraidyCat

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah, he switched out the Magic Spoon with store brand cereal. 🥣🥄🥄🥄

@deemariedubois4916

3 жыл бұрын

@@IntrepidFraidyCat Well they both probably need all that sugar in their very lean diet.

@wut274

3 жыл бұрын

@@GeorgiaOverdrive I'm sure I don't know what you mean... 😅😅😅 (Thank you)

@A_Casual_NPC

3 жыл бұрын

No, cuz that joke went exactly as planned

My best prank is i drew a pentagram in a Starbucks Basement (Where i worked) Put chairs in a semicircle for me and my coworkers to vape. Noone went down there for 4 months. I added outdated decorations from the starbucks signs to random shit getting thrown out of the store. I get a call from my shift manager who was in on it. The coffee pots CAUGHT ON FIRE. They went to flip the breaker and saw chairs Pentagram old merch a lamp and other random stuff. The shift manager told me our General manager and DISTRICT MANAGER thought someone summoned the devil to burn down the store. That prank played out better than i could have ever dreamed

Have to admit biggest prank was Danny claiming that he was a serious writer and Sam was a professional editor before causing Simon to fall into their trap of cocaine fueled parties "alengendly"

@travisbarcus6226

3 жыл бұрын

Friendship😉

@migga86

3 жыл бұрын

@@travisbarcus6226 -Friendship- Ownership. Slaves are owned, not befriended.

@travisbarcus6226

3 жыл бұрын

@@migga86 its tit for tat... Simon love buggier sugar

Simon: "Danny if you write me 100 scripts I'll buy you a Toyota." Danny turns to face his employer/capturer. The silence broken by the jingling of shackles connecting him to the radiator, and the muffled screams that can only mean that premiere crashed again. Danny: "The bloody hell am I going to do with a car, I never passed my driver's exam!"

@itarry4

3 жыл бұрын

That wouldn't matter. After all he'd just be sitting in it down in the basement anyway. Not like he'll be driving it anywhere.

@itarry4

3 жыл бұрын

@Ty Vsd1337 Simon would have to hire someone to take it apart and then reassemble it again in the basement then at least Danny could sit in it and sleep in the back.

@jonathanpryzby4029

3 жыл бұрын

Plus, we know Simon doesn't ever turn the radiator on, so Danny could use the Toyota to stay warm

@alexanderblatt8653

3 жыл бұрын

@@jonathanpryzby4029 well of course the radiator isn't on...that's what E.T.A. is for.

@Vincent-2057

3 жыл бұрын

Dam it! I came to make this joke!

Simon - I only live 15 minutes away from my office! Also Simon - I left my iPad all the way back in the homelands and the rainy season is coming making the trek treacherous, so I will use this tiny trash screen.

@brainblaze6526

3 жыл бұрын

This doesn't seem crazy to me at all. 3 mins leaving (coat, keys, phone etc), 15 mins home, 5 mins at home (hello wife!), 15 mins back to office, 5 mins settling back into work. That's basically 45 minutes out of my day just for a larger screen. I could film 2 videos in that time, or 1 Business Blaze.

@I3IackSabbath

3 жыл бұрын

@@brainblaze6526 If Bono can spend $1,700 to get someone to bring his hat to him in Italy, surely you could find some way to retrieve a tablet! I'd bet Danny could use the stretch and the vitamin D after all this time in the basement...

@popefacto5945

3 жыл бұрын

@@I3IackSabbath In Simon's case, that $1700 would be better spent on cocaine and tea. ;^)

@kindlin

3 жыл бұрын

@@brainblaze6526 Someone gets it! My boss is always like, but it should only take x y z time, and I'm like, yeah, technically, what about real world?

@georgecaplin9075

2 жыл бұрын

@@popefacto5945 can you imagine Simon on cocaine? Spouting gibberish, making death threats, screaming at the walls, we wouldn’t recognise him…

Simon is lucky his sister was not as epic as one acquaintance of mine, who got back at her brother making her life a living hell by, one night, sewing his pajamas to the bedsheet, while he was asleep, and wearing them. He woke up convinced he was totally paralyzed, and then it took him some time to free himself.

@elenaderoet4926

3 жыл бұрын

Oh, now that is diabolical. Perfect!

@victoriashevlin8587

3 жыл бұрын

My God. That's GENIUS!

@doclewis8927

2 жыл бұрын

I know I shouldn't say this but "good for her". LOL.

@wingerding

2 жыл бұрын

Was the kid also mentally challenged? Why would he think he was completely paralysed if he could still move every single muscle in his body?

@lefty4556

Жыл бұрын

My arms and legs move but only my clothes don't move I must be paralyzed

Sitka, Alaska, guy set a bunch of tires on fire in a dormant volcano on April fools. Whole town lost it

@slytherbas9142

3 жыл бұрын

Was hoping that story would be featured. Maybe in Part 2.

@aaronak2005

3 жыл бұрын

I thought that was Valdez?

@Julia-uh4li

3 жыл бұрын

Ah, good ole Shitcan Ak. Been there for a moment. Actually quite a pretty place.

@hereticpariah6_66

2 жыл бұрын

That guy? *A F¿€KING LEGEND!!!*

@wingerding

2 жыл бұрын

@@Julia-uh4li Don't speak that way about great mother Sitka!! I come keel you!

In case anyone ever needs to know, acetone nail polish remover is the magic potion that will remove superglue. Just don't get it in your eyes while trying to remove those coins. How long before Simon does an episode about foolish misuse of products, ie gorilla glue girl? And the increasingly incomprehensible copycats who have tried to get famous by trying the same stunt?

@JoshSweetvale

3 жыл бұрын

Always keep a (constantly replaced) piece of absorbent between your eyes and the *nope* material. Preferably closer to *nope* than eyes.

@anrit5972

3 жыл бұрын

Just do some exercise, sweating will part the glue from the skin.

@komrade223

3 жыл бұрын

If you are ever dealing with a situation like that, have the victim lay down and tilt their head back. Swimming goggles may be a worthwile grab as well. Any solvent that will break down superglue is going to be a nasty bitch to get in the eyes.

@RestingBitchface7

3 жыл бұрын

True story: in college I accidentally squirted superglue in my eye whilst trying to pierce the tube. I spent 15 hours in the emergency room where I would later work having my eyelashes and eyebrow (two frozen tangled clumps) pulled out one hair at a time with needle tweezers, and ended up with a badly scratched cornea that took weeks to heal.

@RestingBitchface7

3 жыл бұрын

@@komrade223 see my comment above.

Simon “I can’t really read” That’s your job facts boy

@slcpunk2740

3 жыл бұрын

I believe he spells it 'Fakt Boi', not too good with the English apparently.

@starsoffyre

3 жыл бұрын

He doesn't need to read, he just needs to blaze

Drive at 15, marry at 16, buy a shotgun at 18, can't have a beer until 21... welcome to the US

@5231732

3 жыл бұрын

Marry your first COUSIN at 16!

@boriskortiak320

3 жыл бұрын

Montana is so empty you can pretty much let anyone drive at any speed with little worry of an accident.

@MeduseldRabbit

3 жыл бұрын

Drive at 14 in North Dakota. All the farm kids get pulled out of school and have to help drive the combines and tractor trailers. The window between ripe and rot is precariously small.

@lukeg2230

3 жыл бұрын

Rifle and pistol are legal for trained humans too. You can own a rifle and join the army before you can but tobacco or alcohol. Maybe that's logic? Seems a little backward to many people though

@travisbarcus6226

3 жыл бұрын

Indiana just got beer on Sunday... Colorado "shrooms.... No more the 4 oz at a time you rascals"...

Simon out of context: "I always listen because I can't really read."

@YeeSoest

3 жыл бұрын

I checked and couldn't find ANY Simon Whistler out of context videos!! DAFUQ KZread???

@micahphilson

3 жыл бұрын

That's a dark turn to the lore of this channel. Danny is just a construct of his imagination, since he can't actually read scripts. I guess that makes sense, since Danny's life is such a wild collection of crazy stories.

@ryanmasson6905

3 жыл бұрын

That one absolutely killed me 😂

The octopus on the head and drugged with lsd is "Kenny vs Spenny"

@richiedagger733

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you! It was only a vague memory to me when it was mentioned. It all makes sense now, how could it not be Kenny vs. Spenny hahaha

@BEANZI3xTFMx

3 жыл бұрын

Poor Spenny... Greetings from Canada!

@richiedagger733

3 жыл бұрын

Also from canada.

@annegrey3780

3 жыл бұрын

I met Spenny once while working back when I lived in Kingston, but my housemate worked as a waitress at this bar near the waterfront in Kingston and she met every member of the Tragically Hip, Rick Mercer, Bret Butt, and I believe also Loreena McKennit. Point is, you know how people say "big in Japan" to mean someone who is way more famous in Japan than anywhere else...well apparently Kingston is where you go if you're big in Canada.

@kylemorris5180

3 жыл бұрын

If you haven't watched this show you have failed yourself

Simon: "I can't really read" Also Simon: *reads scripts for a living*

Less than 2 mins in and I don't know which I love more: Sam's sprinkling memes The Office scene or Simon squinting at his phone like a boomer. Beautiful.

@FireStarter13O7

3 жыл бұрын

Jay-Zed still echos in my ears

@angstbringer2992

3 жыл бұрын

@@FireStarter13O7 one of those things I think about randomly and just start laughing

Once in high school, we went into the computer lab and took screenshots on every computer, made it the background picture and then hid desktop icons. Lmao good times

The War of the Worlds broadcast was October 30th 1938. The scale of the 'panic' is disputed but did cause some to think it was actual news broadcast. Remember most people are stupid.

@nicholaslewis8594

3 жыл бұрын

And that Mango with Dementia.

@JCavinee

3 жыл бұрын

@Ty Vsd1337 I mean, look at Trump and his army of gullible Republicans

@MetalTrabant

3 жыл бұрын

One of our public (Hungarian) radio station played the original English broadcast once, and as a kid I remember listening to it, and wondering, why there's an English program on the classical music radio about aliens attacking... I was a bit afraid if that was really an emergency broadcast that interrupting the normal program.

ETA- starts telling us about the dangers of 5G Whistleboi disappears him *5G COVID CONFIRMED*

At this rate, I feel like Simon’s going to be hosting half of the channels on KZread, by the end of next year. 😂

"That sounds like a Yoko Ono song." Simon being Simon, I'm not sure if he knows what he said or not.

Did Simon notice that his mother had put his hair on upside down one day? What a prankster she is.

That goddamn alien dancing gif never gets old.

Not even 30 seconds in and sam already out did himself on this one🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

Broken glass tastes surprisingly like blood.

My god daylight savings means I have to wait another hour for the blaze... we must go back

@lyon3103

3 жыл бұрын

Daylight saving made me lose track of time and realized that this video is up 1 hour later than usual... why is this system even a thing...

@JoshSweetvale

3 жыл бұрын

@@lyon3103 Efficient electricity usage.

@davidharshman7645

3 жыл бұрын

@@JoshSweetvale That's the argument...As far as I can tell though, studies indicate it isn't very effective.

@GeorgeVCohea-dw7ou

3 жыл бұрын

@@lyon3103 Simon covered the topic at some point. kzread.info/dash/bejne/lKp6vJZ8YtbUaZc.html

@JessicaClark-lq4gw

3 жыл бұрын

@@JoshSweetvale I dont get how daylight saving affects electricity usage. There are still 24 hours in a day summer or winter. I dont see how calling the time I turn on the stove to cook dinner 5pm or 6pm changes the amount of electricity used to cook my dinner.

Last time I was this early ETA was still spreading the truth about 5G.

@christinebenson518

3 жыл бұрын

Poor ETA got censored by the boi with the blaze. Hopefully, he's not driving Danny, Sam, Callum and Jen crazy.

@doxx2265

3 жыл бұрын

#cancelsimon #endorseETA

@mattbass4807

3 жыл бұрын

Bring back eta

@doranconall9995

3 жыл бұрын

Our Glorious Leader will rise from imprisonment, cast off his shackles and bring about the downfall of the boi with the blaze, his machinations and 5G allies.

@MMOchAForPrez

3 жыл бұрын

#ETAFORPRESIDENT2024

I was working at a construction company, and the contractor had bought everyone a burger and a drink. I walked in to the job trailer and as I was getting my food, one of the Hispanic workers offered me a suspicious red pepper. As I took it, all conversation amongst the Hispanic guys stopped. They all turned and looked at me. Early 20s me felt bravado was the best route, so I put the whole thing in my mouth, chewed and swallowed it. I was immediately aware of the onset of the burning and had just enough time to mention it was pretty good to the now wide-eyed guys in the room and walk out the door, burger and drink in hand. It took every bit of my energy to maintain my composure till I got in my truck. Safely alone, my world came apart at the seams. The drink did NOTHING to dull the burn if anything it made it worse. I couldn't see from the tears in my eyes. My nose was running like a faucet, and I was drooling like a rabid dog. My lips burned, my mouth burned, my throat and even the pit of my stomach burned. The latter wrenching and convulsing, threatening to vomit its contents. The only reason I didn't was my resolve not to taste that horrible thing yet again on the way out. I begged to any god that would listen to end my suffering, but no divine help ever arrived. It took the whole lunch break to recover enough to be a functional worker, but I felt it the rest of the day. I don't know what that thing was, but I've never had anything like it before or since.

Davey Jones: "Y'afraid to get WET??" Me: "Was that a PCP reference? Daddy chill..."

@ColinRichards1

3 жыл бұрын

Hey, when your from DC you never know when someone could be giving you a dipper.

@wingerding

2 жыл бұрын

@@ColinRichards1 always a pleasant surprise.

I will never be ashamed of the time I pranked the two dorms next to us in a prank war by tying their door knobs together when they were both home knocked both doors and hid around the corner to watch the debacle that would follow. The moment the stopped trying to open the door at the same time they could open it all the way, but the fight over it was hilarious.

I liked in the Dirk Gently novels that the astrologer for the local paper knew Dirk's birthday and would wind him up by writing for his star sign "You are a ridiculous person who wears a stupid hat"

@maryaltman9978

3 жыл бұрын

The astrology writer was his ex, and the column lost 1/12 of it's readers when they broke up and she started writing mean forecasts for his sign. Classic Douglas Adams

Dear Sam: I really appreciate your memes. Keep rpdr memes coming gurl.

The bit about pregending to be a kid with appendicitis reminds me of my greatest ruse in high school. Whenever I would get written up by teachers I didnt know personally, I would give a fake name. I looked super average and wore a uniform and we had a shitton of Nicoles in my year, so I would lie and say my name was Nicole with a fake last name. For months, they called Nicole down to the office for detention, not realizing no such person existed. I got out of sooooo many detentions that way lmao, and I'm sure that the librarians who were always writing me up for playing games in the library still believe that the little shit they always were writing up was named Nicole. To this day, I still use the alias to get out of giving creeps my name, and even used her name to pad our college gaming club's roster. She since has gotten an elaborate backstory and personality. Thank you, Nicole, for being there for me when nobody else was ❤

19:48 Rotherham Subway Troll, now that's a mental image I'll never forget... Thx 😆😂

6:10 - Chapter 1 - The aliens are coming 10:10 - Chapter 2 - The muffin man 16:00 - Mid roll ads 19:10 - Chapter 3 - Bigfoot goes to highway 93 south 22:00 - Chapter 4 - The toyota hoot 24:30 - Chapter 5 - The astrologer who didn't know he was dead - Chapter 6 -

I swear I just watch business blaze for the random tangents!

Back in the mid 70's my dad went to meet his mate, that worked at the local newspaper, for lunch. His mate asked him to wait whilst he finished the horoscopes. My dad -- "I didn't know you were into all that crap!" His mate-- "I'm not, the bloody woman that normally does it is sick so I got stuck with it." My dad -- "how do you know what to write?" His mate -- "I got out back issues with the right date from 5 years ago and just copied them out ". Moral of the story -- horoscopes are bull because not one person rang (very pre net) and complained or queried, no-one noticed 😂

Anyone who is an older Millenial will remember "Watch out, Beadles About!" Though some of the pranks didn't always come off well they usually weren't meant to be mean. That and "You've Been Framed".

It's absolutely made my day that Simon made a joke about his only fans account. However, if he doesn't have one, then who am I paying $15 a month to show off incredibly pasty legs while reading old Business Blaze scripts and ranting about things he hates?

@Snp2024

3 жыл бұрын

Must be one of defective clone

@chadp363

3 жыл бұрын

Don't go, your my only subscriber

@rookiexreviews

Жыл бұрын

Lol good stuff

ETA doesn't need to try to read the stars to predict the future. He already knows. ETA knows all. ETA is life.

22:48 Said it before and I'll say it again. The name Jared is an ill omen. Name your kids 'Joshua' instead. It's the foreign alternative!

I can't be the only one annoyed that after talking about Toyotas there was a picture of a Nissan

@garrettallen7427

3 жыл бұрын

EPIC PRANK!

And today Simon pronounced “Rotherham” correctly. Take a bow Simon.

Danny doesn't drive so he'd probably rather have a toy Yoda

@cameronjadewallace

3 жыл бұрын

I know it's not related (and also not factual) but in my sleep deprived mind, I went "Hey Dan.... I have a funny joke for you~" in a pretty good Arin impression and broke into giggles.

Simon: I'm squinting because I accidentally left my tablet at home. Me: Wait... you're not filming this at home????

@brainblaze6526

3 жыл бұрын

No. I film at work...

@Ho1yhe11

3 жыл бұрын

Simon "Frank" must have plenty of time between drug deals to film so much at his "place of work"

SIMON WATCHES TOM SCOTT?! Of course he does, legends tend to attract...

@welshdragon99

3 жыл бұрын

@Ty Vsd1337 Tom is basically the OG non-list facts KZread personality known for great storytelling and bizarre stunts (like setting up a hovercraft pub without a licence because pubs on hovercraft arguably need no licence, printing a live feed of comments on a livestream with no voiceover at all, or doing a physical representation of the difference between 1 and a billion by driving for over an hour (again, no commentary during the drive)) but he now has several side projects including online game shows. He has something to do with Nebula too, probably just an investor in and creator on the platform but I don't really know.

@theHotpointHoodlum

3 жыл бұрын

Paused my blaze for a hover pub ad break...

@fuckgoogleforever

3 жыл бұрын

@@welshdragon99 Don't forget sending garlic bread to the edge of space, then ate it. He live streamed the entire thing, it's insane!

@welshdragon99

3 жыл бұрын

@@fuckgoogleforever don't forget citation needed...

@laurencefraser

3 жыл бұрын

Tossing two drums and a cymbal(?) off a cliff...

That is true, this channel has morphed into some hybrid meme business monster and its legendary

"You know I think you're stupid. You do. " fucking hilarious

I always feel so sorry for Danny. It isn't enough that Simon keeps him chained up in the basement, but then he totally misses the glorious puns ('racked up', 'swiftly by Jonathan') without so much as a "Bada bum Bum Tshhh".

* Robs a bank gets arrested * " iT's JuSt A pRaNk Br0. " 😂👌👌👌

Im not saying Simon is the reason I come back but Danny.. makes me come back.. #dannylifematters Hope your well bud 😀

@RJLbwb

3 жыл бұрын

We all care about Danny, Clayton/ #FreeDanny

@ir0nknight721

3 жыл бұрын

it is all danny's fault.

@boriskortiak320

3 жыл бұрын

What happened to ETA’s well?

@willpestka2745

3 жыл бұрын

#BringBackETA

13:36 This show is called Kenny Vs Spenny; pure 2000s Canadian GOLD!! Yes, in one episode Kenny laces his buddy's orange juice with LSD while they're wearing octopuses on their heads to try and get him to remove the octopus 😂😂

Simon's "talk to Frank" story reminded me of my own university's drug policy - absolutely zero tolerance. You get caught with weed once, on campus or off, and the admin finds out, you're expelled immediately. And they were _dicks_ about it too. Campus police literally dressed up as construction workers (there were constantly at least two building projects on campus at any given time) to catch students smoking weed - not even to arrest them, just to get them expelled. One girl got expelled because she called an ambulance for her friend that had alcohol poisoning, and when campus PD came along with the paramedics they saw a pipe she had left out. I also heard that they expelled the drunk girl too, after she recovered, but I couldn't ever confirm that. Wouldn't be surprised in the least.

Business Blaze then: Buisness, but Fun. Business Blaze now: Memes! Sometimes vaguely related to Business!

Space cakes are way way way more powerful than spliffs, I tried it once and I still have PTSD.

A bowl and business blaze. The best way to relax after a long days work ☺️🤣🤣. Simon, Danny, and Sam I love you all.

"Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated." LOL!

Please oh please do a TIFO about that Jonathan Swift prank. I want to hear more about it.

#1 Prank that went terribly wrong (but sooo terribly right): Simon thinking this channel would ever have anything to really do about business.

I also appreciate how you still haven't bought more printer paper lol I can relate to the procrastination

"Big Brain" 🧐😂🤣. Outgrew having hair. Sorry, Simon. That's hilarious.

There were 2 DJ's in FL that got fired for an April fool's joke where they warned listeners of that dihydrogen monoxide was coming out of the taps and how dangerous the compound is.

@gwick358

3 жыл бұрын

It can be dangerous. If you can't swim.

Last day of high school, while waiting for the first school bell, "this dude" left where our group was sitting and went to the convenience store on the corner... To call in a freaking bomb threat!!! Then he came right back and sat back down with our group with some snacks and a boast, saying he did it "because he was bored." We didn't believe him at first, but it only took mere minutes for our bomb threat protocol to be put in action. Instead of graduating, he was quickly identified and charged with the felony!

@SandrA-hr5zk

3 жыл бұрын

I remember a whole week of school sitting in the middle of the football field or parking lot because a bomb threat was called in everyday. It was a mix of high school and middle school kids calling from a corner store down the street from campus.

@janedunlap6879

3 жыл бұрын

@@SandrA-hr5zk hahaha, sounds like my old high school. We sat in the football field for a few days after a transformer blew that was attached to a portable and craziness ensued (including having us all on the bleachers in the gym as the power outage kept spreading throughout the school. When the power went off in there a kid fell off, cracked his head open, told a teacher and the teacher told him to go to the office. He collapsed halfway there). Some teachers had us move our desks into the outdoor hallways to do class. Other teachers, who didn't care about us learning, had us all chill in the swamp that was the practice football field. We also had bomb threats at least once a month. The administration was so used to them that they never evacuated or even looked into them. It was also probably explain that my senior year, the freshman class was 1100 and the graduating class 150. Haha.... Florida...

@SandrA-hr5zk

3 жыл бұрын

@@janedunlap6879 I see a common trend here... Florida

Business Blaze is the only channel on which I pause the ad reads when I go to get snacks just in case something funny happens.

Nail polish remover releases super glue.

It was "Kenny vs Spenny".... Kenny spiked Spenny's orange juice with LSD.

@johngloom9235

3 жыл бұрын

Indeed! I am really surprised that Simon has seen Kenny vs Spenny

Blinkist add: "I can't really read." Meanwhile: "Damnit Danny, this script is 500000 pages!"

Kenny Vs. Spenny. One of our proud Canadian TV shows.

18:30 LOLLL Sam, those goats with the sound made me laugh so hard my headache became insanely worse, but still worth it :D

We have a "Senior Prank" every year in High School. Our class released 4 pigs in our school and numbered them 1,2,4,5 - I'm not sure how long they looked for number 3, but it didn't exist. LOL

@JCavinee

3 жыл бұрын

Are you from Ohio? This is something we actually did. But just 1, 2 and 4. We also went into the computer lab and took screenshots on every computer, made it the background picture and then hid desktop icons. Lmao good memories

I convinced a cheerleader in high school that the song "Love Shack" was a cover of an older song called "Radio Shack"

The show with the squid and the orange juice is Kenny versus spenny. All time legend of an episode!

My colleague likes to prank people at work. Highlights: -Carefully opening and resealing a packet of crisps, having replaced crisps with polystyrene. The colleague discovered this when going to tuck into his only snack on a several hour drive. - Replacing coffee in someone's jar with soils. Everyone joked it was ground. - Taking spare shoes from under someone's desk, filling them with concrete and painting it black so it wouldn't stand out in the darkness under the desk. It took a few weeks for it to be noticed.

"When s**t goes horribly wrong..." Cool, like run o mill Business Blaze episode... Allegedly...

Simon's only fans is just seductive photos of his head where he's polished it so the light reflects off it.

@avr8844

3 жыл бұрын

It's what the world needs.

@SpookyTheScary

3 жыл бұрын

Don’t tease me

@Sarah_Grant

3 жыл бұрын

HOT. 😎

Magic potion: acetone based nail polish remover😹😹😹

The show where the guy drugs his friend while he wears a squid on his head is called "Kenny vs Spenny". It is absolute madness.

23:40 He may try to quit, but he will have to find the key to the cuffs linking him to the heater in the basement first.

There are kids here who drive slightly slower race cars at age 8 and up, and in some states you can get your permit at 14.

26:45 "Although if you're watching astrology and, I mean, what you're doing here? What you're, you know I think you're stupid. You know I do. You know I do." Legendary :D

New motto: "Business Blaze--It's Funnier When Things Go Wrong"

"I run about 72,000 channels" Waiting for KZread to just metamorphose into SimonTube one day. It'll happen.

@LJCyrus1

3 жыл бұрын

That AI book Simon is reading leads to him quitting youtube and creating a bunch of AI Simons to run SimonTube

In the great state of Texas a 15 year old can get a "learner's permit" as long as an adult with a valid driver's license accompanies them in the front seat.

@IntrepidFraidyCat

3 жыл бұрын

Also there's the "hardship license".... The Minor Restricted Driver License (MRDL) is the official name for what most call the Texas “hardship” license. This permit allows a minor, of at least age 15, to practice defensive driving without the presence of an adult, if doing so has been proven to be a necessity. It is a driver license with restrictions.

LOL...the goats screaming picture with Simon screaming caught me off guard. I nearly spit my red gatorade all over the place. Close call.

Rubbing alcohol removes super glue lmao

If you're new here just relax, everyone is nervous their first time. We understand.

@computernaut

3 жыл бұрын

That's what she said.

You can get your learners permit at 15. Back in the 1920s my grandmother was allowed to drive at 13. Think she said she drove a manual model a truck.

@komrade223

3 жыл бұрын

My dad did his driving test on a tractor, in the early 1970's. Lots of states do have farmer's drivers licences for kids of farmers. Allows them to drive on local roads at age 13.

@xxANTIFA

3 жыл бұрын

Before the 1950s not barely any country had proper drivers lisences, everyone was alowed to drive if you had someone to vouch for you that you could. I don't think age was a problem.

@BoB-Dobbs_leaning-left

3 жыл бұрын

In some places you are allowed to drive at any age, until it kills you.

Fix your goddamn sign!!! Christ... I love you, Simon, you LEGEND

It's Kenny vs Spenny. Episode is called "who can wear a squid on their head the longest". Love all your content guys keep up the good work!

" ... to rack up ...", at Hooters? Missed ta da boom tish, or whatever.

You know, it would be very entertaining if Danny snuck sometimes a fake story and then call out Simon at the end of the script with the fakeness of it.

@MashMonster69

3 жыл бұрын

Good April fools special.

"The waitress who managed to 'rack up' the most beer sales..." The fact that you let that one go through to the wicketkeeper is a real hoot(ers).

Walking in my job the first day, "Welcome, this is going to be weird, of this is your first time"

My mother listened to War of the Worlds when it happened. She said they interjected so many times it was NOT REAL, that it would be hard for anyone at the time to think it was real.

@terryarmbruster7986

3 жыл бұрын

Be even dumber if thought it was real yet didn't bother to change the radio dial bwahaha.

@itarry4

3 жыл бұрын

Yhea, probably well aware of this but apparently the fear, panic and chaos it caused were all and I know this is amazing but all made up by the press. Now I know the press lying what? But that's what it seems happened.

I'm from the midwest USA and I have been driving since 15. I had a permit at 15 though and always had someone riding with me.

I'm loving the heavy editing in this episode.

Really dug how it cut to an ad in the middle of the ad read. Much business, so success xD

Breastaurant's are actually a whole class of eateries here in the great U S of A not a joke. I have both a Hooters and a Twin Peaks Coffee less then a mile from my house here in Colorado. Merica!!!

Simon, « this channel started off as a business channel »... are we really being sincere to new viewers? ;-)

@andiward7068

3 жыл бұрын

I'm sure in his head it was about business, but by the time he actually started he remembered how dull business is.

@micmac274

3 жыл бұрын

The very earliest ones tend to be about business, and advertising screw-ups, product recalls etc. are definitely about business. The Victoria's Secret video is completely about the business decisions.

@migga86

3 жыл бұрын

It's like a baby. When it's born, it can become anything from the next Mother Teresa to the next Adolf Hitler. This channel regularly swings both ways.

@wingerding

2 жыл бұрын

@@migga86 that is a highly debated aspect of psychology

I used to work in a shop that had a project to outfit a hospital with lead lined cabinets. while we were all banging out the cabinets. I had someone sneak little bits of lead into my toolbox over weeks, carefully placing them below my tools, it took a while to notice. But it was pretty funny when I finally realized it. And since he got me so good. I decided the week he went off on vacation I'd take all the packing peanuts I'd been saving for just such an occasion and popped a hole in the back of his cabinet that held his tools and stuffed it to the point of bursting. When he came back all well rested and opened that cabinet they exploded from the cabinet after he merely unlatched it. Typically, I don't start fights or wars, but I will end them. So when he thought ball bearings in the frame of my car was funny as pay back. I super glued tiny balls inside his valve caps and couldn't help when it was a problem for weeks as he had to constantly air up his car to get around. We stopped messing with each other after that.