so many of us are autistic, that's why it was such a relief to be professionally diagnosed, it was like a stamp of approval saying "you're not crazy, this world just wasn't made with you in mind"

Cool. I’m 4w5 INFP female and I suspect I’m on the spectrum.

@zauberholz8357

Жыл бұрын

Me too! :)

@beyyyyyyyyyda

Жыл бұрын

omg same

@whitetpoison

11 ай бұрын

Real

@herewegokids7

8 ай бұрын

Same

@gvngbvngiggy

7 ай бұрын

Nah thats just how we are. Everything thats different had to be a disorder nowadays. I think we're actually more evolved and the others havent caught up yet.

An autistic woman, who’s an INFJ 4w5 here as well! I got it on the tests but learned there’s a lot of mistyping on these tests. After a long time learning and focusing on self discovery, I still concluded that I was an INFJ 4w5. Definitely validating to hear this from someone similar to me though.

I am also a 4w5 INFP who is on the spectrum. I view my autism as both a blessing and a curse. And I’ve had a lot of people tell me they would’ve guessed I was an INTP 5. But I can confirm that the problem is not that I’m emotionally detached, it’s that I feel things WAY too strongly. Ironically I often wish I could detach from my emotions the way a 5 does, but I can’t, not really, not for long.

@dragonflydaughters

4 ай бұрын

I wondered if I was both of those as well when I first found these tests, but I'm the same type as you are; a 4w5 INFP on the spectrum (w/ ADHD too unfortunately). I agree with you on feeling things way too strongly. My Dad is an ISTJ, and sometimes I would love to have his ability to detach from strong emotions. But you know, as an INFP through and through, I don't think I'd ever be able to purposely choose to close myself off from the deeper emotions that I feel. Even with the pain that comes along with feeling emotions so keenly, I just would never want to be a cold and detached person. Being an INFP comes sadness and pain, but it also comes with some powerfully POSITIVE emotions too. :)

10:20 recently been telling mysel ‘people do not exist’ so that i can act normally in public. being watched or in the presence of others just fundamentally changes how i think and i hate it.

i’m a 4w5!! excited to watch this :) also INTP too edit: i feel exactly the same way about the reserved/openness comparison you were talking about. that’s how i think about myself too! also TONALITY! man that is something i’ve struggled with my whole life. i think my family perceives my monotone delivery of things as funny or normal, while it offends other people. it’s so hard to know how to communicate through my tone, especially when some days my body just *cannot* do it!!

I'm also a 4w5 INFJ. Up until recently I thought that I was "just" an introverted HSP but I've been doing some research and I'm thinking more and more that I might be on the spectrum. It would explain so much!

I’ve had this video on my watch later for awhile and I’m glad I finally watched…I really needed a reminder that it’s not just me…thank you for sharing your experience and doing so in such a gentle and insightful way

I'm an autistic 4w5 and my best friend is an autistic 5w4 lmao.

Aw man that's so specific but I too fall under 4w5 and have cptsd. I’m an Infj but it makes me slightly sad that my personality is so wholly centered around trauma response

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

damn that hit close to home, time for a deep belly breath to calm me down

I’m a 4w5 and have just realized,at 50 damn years old, that I operated most of my life as a manic 4w5. Constantly searching for something to fill the emptiness. 🤯 I have found some peace in recent years by embracing my hermit side and asserting my boundaries in every direction. What a relief to drop that persona that I spent 1/2 a lifetime building. Not to say it’s been easy either. Thank you for this video. I’ve had slivers of this insight but this just snapped into place. Something positive 🤔 ❤ life does get better with age 📔 try commonplace journaling, it’s like a second brain

@sarahdenae5283

5 ай бұрын

51 and, same. 🥰

im a 5W4 type! very similar yet different 🕵🏻‍♀️

Wow. I'm 65, very recently self-diagnosed on the spectrum, and if self-diagnosed it is with a stunning, earthquake-like clarity that makes sense of a whole lifetime and changes my whole past. Certain online tests have been only dramatically confirming. I'm also, as I learned in the past two years, an INFP 4w5. I think, actually, getting interested in MBTI (first), and then, quite a bit later, doing the Enneagram, then putting MBTI and Enneagram together (leading to further astounding realizations), was all premise and preparation to the final, shatteringly real and integrating ("shatteringly integrating"...well, life IS a paradox, isn't it) discovery that I'm on the autistic spectrum. Among the countless manifestations that I had no way to define or place before, and now they're just flooding together into a sea of clarity, was the hyper-vigilance. I mean...HYPER, and totally exhausting. I finally know why.

Whoa I’m also 4w5 and INFJ, and I’ve been in the process of self diagnosing myself with autism for the past 2 months! I keep going back on forth on whether I’m on the spectrum or not. This video has got me back on the side of definitely autistic lol

4w5 here, been thinking recently that I’m probably autistic. I’m an INFP but don’t really like MBTI anymore and don’t put much by it, enneagram is far better imo. Anyway - I relate a lot to everything you expressed here! I’m perhaps a little more outgoing from my Leo Moon (if anyone here’s vaguely into astrology :P). I’m finding it so validating hearing late-diagnosed autistic women talk about their experience… it’s just not something I deeply considered for myself until I found a friend group where many have autism and it’s openly referenced. Thanks for making this video, I’ll definitely be subscribing and watching more ❤

@maddy8615

Жыл бұрын

I wish you good luck on your self discovery journey ❤☀️

This video is so relatable! I’ve been deep-diving into the enneagram for probably about 2 years now, and I think I’ve finally settled on being a 5w4. There’s so many similarities between 5w4 and 4w5, and like you my test results for both were pretty much neck-and-neck. (My top 3 also included type 9, so all three withdrawn types!) I decided more on 5w4 for me because I relate most strongly to the core fears, desires and motivations of that type.

INFP 4w5 and this was super relatable. I just discovered your channel and gonna binge watch now lol

so much stuff in this video touches concepts and emotions inside me.

You content is amazing and remember you aren’t made for everyone and that’s a good thing.

I remember taking the enneagram test this summer and when I got type 4w5 and read the description of it I literally started crying because it was way too much accurate lol, especially on the part of the "emptiness", that they may feel and never tend to fulfill...

Definitley found your channel because I did a search for Enneagram and Autism. It is hard for me to believe how few videos there are on this topic. I don’t think I have ASD but I have friends who do and I am deep diving into the enneagram so it has been an interest for sure.

yea the interpretation. this is weird ur talking about stuff i’m currently experiencing. turning it off is like sitting down after walking for hours.

I’ve been wondering about this. Thanks for your insight! PS-I was diagnosed with ASD last year and I am a 5w4 :)

This hyper individual thing is soooo true!

Very well done, and your use of video and editing helped as well. 👍

4w5 INFP, just started my 4-session ASD Assessment. Thanks for your content!

I love that as I've gotten deep on the Autism research I had this same thought like is it Autism or is it personality so much seems to coorelate for me between these... I've followed Frank James for a while am INFJ and 4w5&3 (5 is a little higher than 3 but theyre close). Watching his videos about INFJ types just reminds me so much about characterisrics of Autism. Also feel like the Creative type in the big 5 totally had major Autism similarity for me when I did that one. Not diagnosed here just highly suspicious and deep in the weeds of research for the past months for me and my kiddo both.

patterns behind u so cool

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

so soothing

I’m an ENFP 4 w audhd. Idk what my wing is, I relate to both so much no matter how much I read 😄

AuDHD & 4w5 Greetings and well wishes from Oregon

I'm an autistic INTP who is a 5w6 with 9w8 and 4w5 as part of my tritype. I initially took an MBTI test in a high school psychology class and mistyped as ISTJ and later mistyped as INTJ before reading up on cognitive functions and finding out I'm an INTP. I thought I was an INFJ or ISTP at some point but both my Fe and Se are too bad to be my secondary functions so that ruled me out as either of those.

I have high suspicions of AuDHD, also a 4w5

Wow. I have ADHD. I believe I am autistic, but am waiting on an evaluation for confirmation. I am an INFJ. And I’m also a 4w5. When I hear you talk, it’s sort of like being inside my own brain. Having spent most of my life feeling like an alien, I’ve never had that happen! 😅 Something is definitely going on here with all of us having so many commonalities!

Autistic 9w1 infp, tritipe 945 ; this resonates . Thank you for sharing

I feel like there is a correlation between autism (and in my case also ADHD) and 4w5. On the 4 side, there is this question of 'who am I?' which is so hard to answer when we get this message from an early age that we have to choose between being genuine and being accepted. So there is this deep wish to be authentic, and to know who we truly are beneath the mask. But there is also this need for love and belonging. It can be hard to get really close to another person because of that. And on the 5 side, there is this constant analysis of other people, because we don't always have that intuitive understanding that comes naturally to an allistic person. I remember when I was a kid, doing experiments to find out how much eye contact was too much by a process of trial and error. I would look at a random person and see how long it took them to seem uncomfortable. That took a very long time to learn. But other kids seemed to just know. Or how we have so much knowledge about those few special interests, because we have this boundless curiosity about those subjects. Even if that knowledge is not practically useful, or does not make us more popular, or any of the things that most people are motivated by, it is intrinsically interesting and therefore worth knowing about. I feel like the 5 question is 'what does it mean?' So I guess it makes sense for a 4w5 person to ask 'who am I and what does it mean?' And I feel like that's also a question that a lot of autistic people ask ourselves, because we know that we are different and we want to understand that.

OMG this is me! 4 wing 5 Enneeagram and diaognosed Asperger syndrome! Thank you for this 🙂

INFJ here, did the test as soon as I saw the thumbnail and got 4 with a 5 wing. LOL! Awaiting my professional diagnosis, but have already tested at 180 on the RADS-R when my psych administered it. The world is finally starting to make a little bit more sense

literally not knowing what the fuck is going on and being forced to understand or be confused eternally

I am also an INFP and 4 wing 5. I am not on the spectrum but I have been told I am too logical especially when it comes to making decisions that should be emotional. But a person can be very logical and cautious without being autistic. These things are nuanced and vary in degree. Being autistic also is not necessarily a disability. There is strength in being steadfast and being resistant to outside criticism and not being easily influenced. Some people might see that as independence to a fault. But you do make good points. Maybe some of us can relent a bit and start to give in to relationships. Let up a bit on the ultra intellectualism and just let go and have fun and enjoy ourselves.

Same chart as mine except the 1 and two are reversed, be interested to know if you have taken aptitude tests and found no bias or preferences on it.

Infj 4w5. Also, STRONG 5. Ive referred to it as being Nemo in the ennegram 🐠 lol I have resisted learning about and figuring out if I'm on the autistic spectrum, ive leaned into diagnosing myself with a pd or similar mental illness. Maybe i need to explore..

Please can you tell me how you turned off the observer part of your brain?

You read my mind sister. I re read, Palmers Enneagram book two weeks ago after years. I thought to myself I gota make a video about 4w5 and ADHD or ASD

I'm a type 7 INFP and I have both combined ADHD and Autism.

I'm 5w4, test as INTJ (though cognitive functions scream INTP at me) and autistic (suspect AuDHD). I have very high 5, 8 and 4, but I relate most to the motivations of the 5. I have a friend who is a 4 (probably w5, but I'm not sure on that) and just noticing the contrasts between me and him has really solidified the "I'm not a 4". I'm also fairly outgoing and emotional for a 5.

4w5 INFJ 🤍 I used to mask a lot in my 20s and 30s. The expectation to be “ON” is also very American. When I visit my friend in Germany and traveling in Europe generally, you realize they see Americans as weirdly smiley and fake nice all the time. Europeans resting facial expressions would be considered RBF here. I think the states tends to be a monoculture. Everywhere else it’s perfectly normal to see a variety of personality types in public. Melancholic, sanguine, reserved, quiet, gregarious, cheerful, serious, bubbly, terse, blunt, etc. With practice and grounding and healing inner child wounds of self worth it becomes much easier to be calm and focused versus getting overwhelmed and scattered.

Actually 5w6 here, I've known enneagram for more than 25 years, and it was fine enough for me to understand myself... Now 57 recently diagnosed autistic, I realise there was much more to it ...

I view a reserved person as being a more private person. The term, 'reserved' doesn't really make me think of how open minded or closed minded a person is, but rather, are they a 'sharer?' Are they an open type of personality? Do they freely share their opinions with others, even the opinions that could be unpopular or more private in nature? Are they the type of person that shares some of the deeper, more vulnerable pieces of their personality? Do they let you see who they TRULY ARE and what they really think? Or do they sit quietly and keep their inner thoughts and opinions hidden? Do they let people get a genuine look at who they are underneath, or does sharing what's under the mask make them feel too exposed? If they're more quiet, mysterious and they don't communicate much about how they really think and feel then I'd label them as being reserved.

i’m an isfp 4w5 and i’m diagnosed with bpd :3

I am a 4w5 INFJ with high-functioning autism

I’m an INTP, and as for the enneagram I’m either a 4w5 or a 5w4

i was just looking at all the videos you had and saw this and thought oop i’m a 4w5 ENFP adhd and autistic LMAO

I'm INFP and 6w7-ADHD and also I think i can be autistic

INFP 4w5 retired female on the spectrum.

I'm a ENFJ, enneagram 4.. but I had 20 points for both 3 and 5 wings.. I have some symptoms of autism but I can be sociable when I want to.. it happens sometimes.. less and less

I'm an autistic woman that's an ENFJ ennagram 9w8 or 1

OMG I am a enneagram 4 as well as a INFJ! What?! :O

5w4 INTP with ASD in da house

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

4w5 infp with ASD on the decks (scratching them very gently so as not to damage them)

I'm an INFP with 7w4, I also suspect that I have autism and ADHD. And diving into this research, things have never been so clear. 😭 For example when I go into social situations I tend to mask my ADHD by being quiet and not sharing as much. It obviously fails but the point is my mask is also my truth because at times I am quiet and self reserved, hence my autistic side.

@violina5625

Жыл бұрын

wait a sec, you can't be 7w4. the wings for enneagram 7 are 6 and 8. if you mean that you relate to enneagram 7 and 4 the most, then the four id going to be in your tritype, but the wing is the number before or after your highest enneagram number.

@The-KingsDaughter

Жыл бұрын

@@violina5625 Ohh okay. Yes that what I meant! Thanks for the clarification!

I haven't watched the whole video yet, but those tests don't really *determine* your type- they're good as a place to launch off if you don't know much about the enneagram; you should research all of your top 3 results and see which one's core desires/fears/wants resonate with you the most, because that's what the enneagram is really about. :D

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

I've taken ever test known to man (or at least to the internet) and got the same exact results every time lol, I'm pretty textbook which I find very comforting

I googled what enneagram type *may* have a higher incidence of autism because i have thought i may be on the spectrum. As a 4W5 INFP, I am not surprised my type came up haha

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

we have the same type and similar profile picture lol, hi twin

@Talkingdaisy-no6nu

11 ай бұрын

@@inactive120 too funny! Pink rose/peony twins

I’m 5w4 INTP.

Im 4w5 INTP omg

Enneagram is an interesting personality theory. I like MBTI, but in some ways, I like Enneagram better because it gets into the nuances and complexities of human behavior better than MBTI does. When I take the Enneagram tests, both self-tests and ones where someone types me, I get a result of either 5 wing 4 or 4 wing 5. My 5 and 4 scores are almost identical. I wonder how many autistic people score the same or almost the same in two of these types. In Enneagram, having that happen seems to make more sense and to still fit the model whereas when you find yourself scoring as two or more MBTI types, it means you are 'mistyped' and still don't understand the theory right. I'm not sure if MBTI really works for autistic and other neurotypical people. I test as INTJ, INFJ, INTP and INFP. For a neurotypical, that means I'm doing it 'wrong', but I've even had MBTI testers get these different results different times that they test me. We neurotypical people don't fit the molds of MBTI very well. "All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players..." - As You Like It by William Shakespeare. No one knows that better than us autistic people. We have no choice but to behave like actors in a play. Unfortunately for us, the parts we are cast in are vastly different from how we really are as a person. We are miscast for sure. The anime clip is a pretty good illustration of how I feel a lot of the time. Like a hermit or monster who is wounded and retreats to a cave as often as possible to try to heal and to avoid getting wounded again. People reach out to me, but sometimes I just can't handle it and I retreat from them. It's only by intervention from concerned coworkers in the past that I've gotten the mental help I needed when I was depressed to the point of giving up and stopping taking care of myself that I'm still here. Later on, it was through the intervention of caring coworkers that made it possible for me to meet my wife. If it hadn't been for that second set of coworkers, I'd probably still be single and as much of a hermit as our modern American culture allows for. Some people probably wonder if my wife and I are really getting along because we seldom do social things together. We get along as well as any neurotypical and neurodivergent couple can and really love each other, we just don't act like typical 'normal' couples do. We spend a lot of time doing our own things and take a lot of breaks from being together not because we don't love each other but because she understands me well enough to know that I need alone time. Very interesting video. I can certainly relate to what you said about being overly critical and analytical all the time. I try to relax, unwind and just 'be' sometimes, but it doesn't last long. Even when I go out into my backyard garden, I find it relaxing and pleasant to be sure, but it isn't long before I'm studying it minutely like I study everything. I start examining the plants to see if they are healthy, determining how far along some of them are in their life cycle and how soon they might go to seed, I mulch the beds, pull tree seedlings, etc. It looks like I'm working my rear off out there sometimes, but it's as close to relaxing as I usually can get. Even if I'm watching a movie, TV show or video, I can't help but study it and likely notice more things about it than its creators intended for me to notice. I have to pause and rewind videos often, including this one, because I suddenly realize that I've stopped focusing on what the presenter is saying and my attention has zeroed in on the background. For example, in this video, I found myself trying to read what the neon sign behind you said. It looks like it says something. Also, it won't be long now before your plants will need potted up to larger pots, but they look relatively healthy for the time being. They could use a little liquid fertilizer that has micronutrients in it though.

This is a parable I wrote to help lay the ground to make my discovery comprehensible to my friends: Sammy A Parable Once upon a time there was a man named Sammy. Sammy was paraplegic, but he didn't know it. Sammy thought he had exactly the same capacity, and responsibility, to get around and navigate life precisely the way "everybody else does". Nobody else noticed Sammy was paraplegic, either. Sure, they noticed he was a bit...unorthodox in his ways, a little quirky, occasionally annoying, that it took him rather longer to get to the office, that he didn't rush to the water cooler for gossip like the rest of the gang, occasionally dropped out of things without satisfactory explanation, but, well, "it takes all kinds." They liked him all the same (at least most of them did ), even if it meant making certain allowances. One day Sammy was watching some videos about people called "paraplegics." As he watched, something started making awful, wonderful sense. He thought, no, it can't be. But then he looked down at his paralyzed legs and realized, "Oh my God. That's me." Sammy felt both elated and slightly terrified at the sudden clarity of it all. Would it be ridiculous after all this time to tell everybody he was paraplegic? But...how could he not? It was too late to un-see what he'd seen, and he wasn't going to pretend, so what could "not telling anybody" even mean anyway? Sammy went online and ordered a beautiful motorized wheelchair. When it was delivered he tried it out and, of course, it was just amazing. When he got to work the next day, his coworkers were very perplexed. Something was different. "What is it, Sammy? There's something about you. You look fresher, more relaxed, more...well, like you but even more so! Did you get a haircut? Is it a new cologne?" Sammy mentioned his paralyzed legs and the wheelchair. Suddenly they saw it and went "Oh!!!" Then they went "O-o-ohhh...." And nearly all of them were very glad for Sammy. They felt a little bad that they'd never noticed before but Sammy said that was okay, he hadn't noticed either. A few of his coworkers were peeved, though, and said things like, "What, are you stupid? Why are you suddenly acting all paraplegic?" Sammy didn't get mad. He only smiled, because he was empathetic to their discomfort. Plus, he knew he wasn't acting--couldn't even if he wanted to--and that made all the difference. (Plus he knew they'd get over it soon, because people have short attention spans.)

4w5 INFP female who suspects she's on the spectrum here lol

So are 4w5 more likely to talk about being a 4w5?

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

lol yh ur starting to get it

I thought you were 4/5 too, i al 5/4 and also thinking and analyzing a lot to much. A mix of INTj and ENTP, ambient, it must mean being a mix, depending on the mood i was in when i took the test i guess. Like your videoes. I think almost you will talk and express ypur way out of autism in some way, in case you would like too be closer to otjer people..? Just guessing. You are a good medicator, i think too, and an emotional one..

you really want me to believe im autistic you do know that gifted people are neurodivergent too right

WHAT

We are Sigmas.

@littlebird3495

Жыл бұрын

What does that mean?

@inactive120

11 ай бұрын

​@@littlebird3495something people say to feel better about themselves

@spacebar9733

2 күн бұрын

@@inactive120 I think they were joking lol

I'm also 4w5 & on the spectrum