Former Mormon missionaries! What crazy rules did you have to follow? Which ones were the hardest? We wanna hear about your experiences! Also, if you think videos like this are valuable and want to support our channel, pledge any amount on Patreon and you’ll get access to all of our FUN BONUS videos! ✨ www.patreon.com/zelphontheshelf

@kennethd.9436

3 жыл бұрын

As soon as a dentist became my mission president, Coca-Cola/soda was banned. In South America, many Mormons drink soda with lunch, so this rule was uncomfortable. Refreshing the stereotype of Mormon Doctrine to not drink Coca-Cola. Smh.

@exmodeadpool

3 жыл бұрын

We were not allowed to eat fish, mushrooms and Coca-Cola (caffeine) . Every time we ate at McDonald's, I was ordering Big Mac and Filet-O-Fish. If my companion was telling me that we can't eat fish, I used to poorly mimic surprise and guilt on my face and say: "Oh no! I forgot! What am my going to do? I can't throw it away, it's food after all! There are people starving all over the world!"

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Alexander Titorov jesus was really against fish right?

@NathanAMeyers

3 жыл бұрын

How do I get my mormon friends who are on missions to be receptive to understanding their predicament?

@hero0fcanton190

3 жыл бұрын

I had a new companion that bragged that he saved the church money by only eating bread and drinking tap water. He stopped because I guilted him with the your body is a temple and proper eating was honoring god. 18 year later I still shudder I had to do that!

I stopped wearing makeup during my mission and my Mission Presidents wife told me I had lost the countenance of Christ upon my face. That’s when I learned that my Mormon glow had just been mascara and highlighter all along.

@jayanderson147

3 жыл бұрын

omg

@andrewenderfrost8161

3 жыл бұрын

Oof that's cruel.

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Highlighter is the best way to be filled with the light of Christ!

@FUB654

3 жыл бұрын

Oh, that's so horrible. How is wearing make-up equate to devotion🤔. Just goes to show you😉

@ghostophelia2245

3 жыл бұрын

One time at a church dance, I had several older men tell me that I had the light of christ. Including the stake president and a few bishops. I hated the church at that point. I was just wearing makeup

My Mormon experience ended with the suicide of my 17 year old son. I taught him that the church was the truth. He got a girl pregnant and disqualified himself for the mission. The pressure to be "worthy" destroys

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

I’m so sorry. 💜💜💜💜

@starseedsupport8204

3 жыл бұрын

@@ZelphOntheShelf It has been 18 years but i came across this channel and had to comment. People need to know the down side. Thank you

@playlisttarmac

Жыл бұрын

Sorry for your loss

@lyndavonkanel8603

Жыл бұрын

As a mother myself I know this grief is brutally painful and will never truly end. I am so very sorry. Knowing that God is merciful and that He loves us immensely can we trust Him with our souls? Might it be possible to have hope that all will be well?

@sydneyhunter9424

Жыл бұрын

@@lyndavonkanel8603 ma’am this is really not the time or place for this. let people grieve without trying to shove religion at them

The most triggering memories are: -being screamed at by random people -having a gun pulled on me -seeing sisters around me losing their hair, vomiting, losing weight due to stress. (I lost lots of weight myself) -blatant misogyny. (Being dismissed during Ward meetings after giving our numbers for the week because we were "just the sisters", watching the elders baptise the people we taught, ect) -being sexually harassed by men all day long -having a narcissistic companion that put immense mental strain on you but being forced to be around them 24/7 -having to study for hours while having ADHD -having to talk to people ALL the time and appear happy when you're extremely introverted -having numbers equate your worth -being judged and admonished to withdraw your personality so you can conform to a missionary standard I still have nightmares about my mission, about as much as do about my childhood abuse, so I know it messed me up pretty bad even though I feel a lot better now 6 years later.

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Ahhhhhh

@strongtower9237

3 жыл бұрын

Jesus said, "Follow Me." Jesus is the good Shepherd. Jesus will never let you down.

@Anita-vc8nb

2 жыл бұрын

I'm so sorry you went through that. I'm sending lots of virtual hugs your way.

@confessionsofafangirl5518

2 жыл бұрын

@@strongtower9237 Touting you religion doesn't help religious trauma. You're being more than rude with this response. If you truly think that Jesus is good and loving, then maybe address the fanbase doing bad in his name before telling their victims to just try another group.

@anastasios0513

2 жыл бұрын

@@confessionsofafangirl5518 As I said elsewhere, if one assumes his/her religion is true, then there is no reason to be dismissive. The best thing to do is listen, try to understand, pray, and advocate within the religion for change. There are plenty of former LDS missionaries who STAY in the religion and still live with these experiences. Their religion believes in continuous revelation, so perhaps they should pray to their God to help them find ways to improve their missionaries' experience, rather than dismissing them as just a result of the Devil.

My president's wife taught us that all our sickness comes from disobedience. It was really confusing to hear because in the beginning of my mission I had to undergo a surgery to remove a tumor that was growing in my thigh since I was 6 or 7 - before the age of accountability. Maybe it was a punishment from God for not picking up my toys...

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Eeeek

@legendswarble2845

3 жыл бұрын

I had a similar experience at the private school I went to. They thought that mental illness was a punishment from God for you sins. I struggled with anxiety and depression and given that my primary teacher was the vice principal, I'm sure you can imagine how that went.

@annieinwonderland

3 жыл бұрын

Got told that I have Eleplisy because I wasn't praying hard enough.

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

She was speaking false doctrine, much like things that the Pharisees taught.

@SpecOpsDoctor

3 жыл бұрын

If she really said that then she’s the one with a sickness.

Missionary “health care” is total nonsense. Members in my old ward shared tearful testimony of their missionary son with a fever and feeling totally sick and ‘pushing through ’ and getting cured by the evening as ‘miracle’. My wife fell down a staircase on her mission, got a concussion, didn’t even recognize her companion when she woke up, they called the AP’s and were told, “no don’t go to a doctor, take an extra 30 minutes for lunch. You’ll be fine.” I injured my knee riding my bike on my mission, told my mission president, he took 6 weeks before he chose to schedule me an appointment with a doctor. (It was a modern country, he just delayed getting around to it) Within 2 minutes of my appointment the doctor confirmed I had torn my ACL and I was sent home 2 weeks later to finally have my very delayed major surgery.

@harrisonpeterson3733

3 жыл бұрын

Fucking hell!

my sister went to Indonesia, and within the first few months she got a serious kidney infection, and she was encouraged to keep going out and proselyting even though she was in severe pain. Her companion finally talked to the mission president who, upon seeing how sick she was, let her take 1 hour to go to the hospital. She ended up needing a continual treatment, but she was pressured to stay and do it in the hospitals there. She would go in on her p day so she wouldn't "take her time away from God."

@khazermashkes2316

3 жыл бұрын

That's so abusive!

The lack of boundaries is truly disturbing. I remember being terrified whenever the Mormons came around because you couldn't seem to get rid of them. I remember one instance in particular when my dad opened the door when they knocked, without thinking. He saw them, said "I know who you are, I'm not interested, thanks" and went to close the door and one of these children *stuck his leg fully into our house* as my dad was shutting it. My dad yelled at him to get out of our house so he could close the door and he wouldn't, so my dad told me to "find a blunt object", I returned with a bat and they hightailed it out of there. We never opened the door after that, just pretended we weren't home or yelled at them to get lost.

@12presspart

3 жыл бұрын

the book of mormon has been proved false there are no ancient cities in north or south america the incas /mayas had some historical buildings but nothing in n america no jewish hebrew dna in native americans just a few burial mounds found all over the world but pre history no golden plates i could go on yet the LDS still beleive it

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

Very few missionaries have done that, but it looks like you missed out on a great opportunity to hear the word of God.

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

jim walker The Book has not been proven false, but nice try.

@goatdeer8403

3 жыл бұрын

@@aceuni-rider6921 "Missed out on a great opportunity" when people do not respect your agency, boundaries, or consent, it's more like dodging a bullet. Also LMFAO "the book has not been proven false but nice try" so condescending. You seriously think that Native Amercans (of which there are many, many cultures and tribes unrelated to your religion) are derived from Jewish tribes? Seriously? It's arrogant to think that those cultures couldn't exist unrelated to your religion

@MsCornyDogs

3 жыл бұрын

Church members came looking for my spouse after he officially resigned. Somehow they got our address, probably through a family member. I asked them to leave and closed the door, and they actually knocked again demanding to know "why". Proselytizing is invasive and rude.

Years ago my mum used to bring the missionaries in to our house,she never wanted to listen what they said but she felt so sorry for these kids and offered them a tea/coffee,which they obviously never took and even offered some a phone to call their parents which they refused but many of them really wanted to,she always said they were so sad and had no life in their eyes.

@caseykee5496

3 жыл бұрын

I had two missionaries in my ward during Harvey. I coerced their parents numbers and emails to be able to let them know that they were ok. No lights, no communication, massive catastrophic storm from mom eyes I couldn't help but to put myself in their mom's shoes.

@jasonroberts9788

3 жыл бұрын

I think your mom was projecting wjat she wanted to see on them. Also, would your mom invite Muslims or jews over and offer them yummy bacon or pork? Your mom sounds like a grade A azz.

@furkanwhiteheart9885

3 жыл бұрын

Jason Roberts just wow. i cant say anything that ur completely brainwashed mind will understand but im so sorry.

@annaking7202

3 жыл бұрын

I hope to do a similar thing someday, probably just offer them some water and chocolate chip cookies instead of tea or coffee, but just invite them in and listen to what they have to say

@jasonroberts9788

3 жыл бұрын

@@furkanwhiteheart9885 You got part of that right. You can't really say anything. All you offered was a logical fallacy. You can't articulate a thought, so you just attack me by saying Im brainwashed LOL How unimaginative of you. PS, my first comment is still valid and holds.

Honestly, I met the woman I care about more than life itself while she was serving a Mormon mission. She was called to the area I grew up in and I was visiting my dad during Christmas time. But it wasn't because she was a missionary. Honestly, I couldn't have cared less about that. I grew up in the church. Meeting missionaries was a regular occurrence in my life. But for some reason, she was different than any other missionary I had ever met. She truly listened to me. She didn't offer any half baked rehearsed primary answers to my questions. She validated my doubts. In fact, she actually got into trouble for continuing to hang out with me almost weekly because I was already a member. But she didn't care. It's been 7 years and we're still the best of friends. I came out as transgender to her, to told her I was in love with her, I told her I was finally leaving the church. Still, she remained so incredibly loyal. Nothing like any missionary I had ever met before.

I worked in a local record shop that specialized in death metal & punk in 1990. We loved all our LDS customers who would come in & browse frequently. At the end of their missions, they'd stop by and actually buy something. 😆

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Aww!

@psalm91.777

Жыл бұрын

Dang I need a shop like that now

The Mormon missionary "sisters" I've talked with (for street epistemology) said they couldn't look things up on their smart phones because the church put blocks on their internet access for the duration of their 2 year mission, so they could exclusively focus on info from the LDS website resources. I just put a little ☑️by that information control factor of qualifying as a cult.

@allisoneuph1

2 жыл бұрын

Yep. I met missionaries and they said the same thing.

@hittsrus5185

4 ай бұрын

Bingo

it's hilarious listening to rm's give their mission talk when they come back because they're like "it was miserable, I almost died, I lost two years of my life, but I wouldn't trade it for the world!!1!" really inspiring stuff

Lowkey worried that my dad has a lot of unresolved trauma from his mission because he has NEVER spoken about it to me or my siblings (this strikes me as weird because every mormon man I know won’t shut up about their missions no matter their age). All I know about my dads mission is he served in Japan for about 6 months and then got some sort of illness and served the remainder in Texas. He is still very much TBM and disappointed in me for leaving. I worry that something horrible happened to him on his mission and he never told anyone or even processed it himself.

@mooseymcflurffycat3018

Жыл бұрын

I think you might be right,something mymust have happened. For example. My dad was a marine in Vietnam and even he one day came out and told me the full story of how he earned his purple heart. It involved his friend being unalived by a grenade. He was traumatized.

On my mission the women were REQUIRED to ALWAYS wear "feminine makeup", have our nails painted in "feminine colors", and wear perfume, and if we didn't (especially at meetings), then we were humiliated and reprimanded, and our mission mom would give us what we "needed" until we could buy it ourselves.

@cassmr8366

3 жыл бұрын

Where’d you serve?

@emdegn1904

3 жыл бұрын

@@cassmr8366 Brazil- Santos!

@josesosa3337

3 жыл бұрын

Disgusting.

@ThunderTaker1215

3 жыл бұрын

So wearing makeup is essential, but providing basic needs like food, medical care etc. is neglected. Wtf.

A girl I grew up with lost her 16yr old brother in a head on collision while she was on her mission. It was devastating and coming from a small Mormon community the funeral service was huge. She and her brother were really close and they played sports together growing up. She chose to stay on her mission for the remaining 11 MONTHS in order to help “bless her family”. Her younger sister left before she returned, and the saddest thing I’ve heard was their mother saying “I’ve said goodbye to one of my children every six months for the last year and a half. I’m ready for a hello”. I’m sure all this family needed at the time of their sons death was to be together and grieve. Instead their dedication to the church split them apart.

I served 6 months and ended up being super suicidal and stayed in a mental hospital which was better than the mission. Thought my only way out of the mission was death. Makes me sad my mental health was so bad there

@ZelphOntheShelf

2 жыл бұрын

💜💜💜💜

I worked at a Wendy's owned by a mormon (YEARS ago) the 2 missionaries were allowed to order whatever they wanted, as much as they wanted on Sunday. Our crew would try to guess how much those boys would order, we were pretty sure they were eating for the week. We felt bad for them, they ate like they were starved. and honestly we (the crew, especially the morning shift) felt sorry for them.

@Chrisjay-yw2cu

3 ай бұрын

Sunday is the sabbath its.a very important day to LDS

@Janner-bs2bi

3 ай бұрын

@@Chrisjay-yw2cu I know, they were nice boys, (40 years on looking back) I am glad the owners let those boys eat (the food then, especially their breakfast was MUCH better. we ground out meat for burgers in store overnight)

My little brother has asthma. Was on his mission during COVID-19, under quarantine for months. Had bronchitis but wasnt allowed to go to the normal dr, just the mission nurse. After 2 months he wasn't getting better, got an x-ray and turned out he basically only had function of one lung. The church has billions but heaven forbid they pay for a simple dr visit. He didn't want to be sent home so he doesn't blame them... probably blames himself. I was livid to find out how sick he was when they finally sent him home.

@tinman3586

2 жыл бұрын

They do a shit job taking care of their missionaries which is beyond shameful. But it's okay to hoard over 100 billion and build shopping malls.

@hamboogurhelpa2147

Жыл бұрын

It's not the church, it's the abomination of desolation, antichrist of lucifer. Matthew 25

@trissvlogs

Жыл бұрын

A lot of member in sicks and the church doesn't help, i have view member friends died in a sickness without church helping, it is not the church of Jesus Christ, because Jesus helped so much sickness people, but lds church just collect the benefit of the law of tithing and the law of consecration to built their inc, it doesn't work to help the poor and the sickness.

@theeight-roadwanderer6286

Жыл бұрын

@@hamboogurhelpa2147 Wait, you think there's a difference between those two things?

Makeup was required in my mission for sister missionaries... We were pretty much forbidden from a full-face of makeup, but we had to wear some if we were going to be "exact" in our obedience. Oi... Also, we worked SO hard to talk to everyone, reach out to members for contacts, and then we were constantly informed of how big of failures we were by members and mission leadership because we needed MORE member present lessons, more baptisms (even in areas that I helped take from 8 lessons a week to over 30 within about a transfer). Then, I got criticized by my mission president for following mission rules set forth by SLC, and sent home. So... that was cool, haha!

The mission sent me home because I was getting sick a lot from the anxiety and depression I got. It was the most stressful time of my life and I felt like I failed because I got sent home early when I wanted to be there. So glad though I didn’t waste 1 1/2 years, just 6 months.

@angeldream1

3 жыл бұрын

I’m so sorry they did that to you and I’m glad you got to go home 💕

@Kiddaperdidda

3 жыл бұрын

aubrey it’s ok. I’ve learned to let go and look at the positives of coming home early. I’m happier outside the church!

@vinster9165

3 жыл бұрын

You missed out on all the fun

@starhunter9085

2 жыл бұрын

*I've recently met with 3 mormon chicks and we had an hour long discussion about our respective beliefs. They were really nice even if very uneducated on Biblical texts. We met again yesterday and the conversation ended abruptly after I mentioned an inconsistency about the Book of Mormon when compared to the Bible.*

@merciavous666

Жыл бұрын

Then u should't have gone in the first place. Resolv ur psycho problems

I was really good at acting like a good missionary. I trained several times and was even a district leader. I was really angry because of several things in my life before I left. For several reasons going on a mission was a little better than being at home. So I went. Out of the frying pan and into the fire. I did sneak my PSP and music. And I bought amazon gift cards with mission money and bought these sleeping headphones and put them in my beanie during winter so I could listen to music. I also told everyone that i was pre-diabetic so I wouldn't get fat lol. I made fun of zone leaders and other missionaries for using missionary voice ( zone leaders and APs hated that lol ) I did tell my district to actually try and help people and I would joke during meetings that it's "all about the numbers". I did play a lot of MTG which was fun. I've been recovering from the dissociation for 5 years now. I now almost feel like my self again

@blue0tter

3 жыл бұрын

I think I’ve experienced disassociation as well. Finally going to see a therapist to get some of these things sorted out.

@jordanalexander8099

3 жыл бұрын

I can relate 100%

@billyjack3596

3 жыл бұрын

Freakin apostate...you should’ve stayed home

@Skyefaux

3 жыл бұрын

@@billyjack3596 why are you even here? lol wish I had... I'm not the one who's still being cucked by a cult for my money, time, and entire self identity

@billyjack3596

3 жыл бұрын

Benjamin Shurts I could ask you the same question...I didn’t think people from UVU / BYUI were smart enough to get on KZread

I joined the military while a family member of mine was on a mission, and I had more communication with our family in *boot camp* than my family member had the entire time they were on a mission. Both are culty, lol, but one gives you a paycheck and college money at least.

Everytime I think about my mission I'm shocked I survived the entire two years. I will be unpacking that shit my entire life

@kelleren4840

3 жыл бұрын

Same. 100%

@laurelj8818

3 жыл бұрын

Ben Shurts? Hey, I was friends with your sisters when we were kids! Lived in the same small town. They're awesome. :) Sorry your mission was so traumatizing. Hope you are able to heal and find peace in your life. Best wishes to you and your family.

@Skyefaux

3 жыл бұрын

@@laurelj8818 yo that's awesome. Don't remember you from the name but glad you ended up at a zelf vid. I'm down to chat though. I'm most active at my insta @bensartanddesign

@darkwhyt

3 жыл бұрын

Suck it up, princess haha. It's just two years. It's not like you served in the marines and had to worry about being killed. You must be from Utah/Idaho? :P

@LittleMissLion

3 жыл бұрын

I hope you're out of the church. If you can get away from the church as much as possible (both physically and on social media), I highly recommend. It gets easier that way.

when my daughter got off the plane returning home from her mission it was 110 degrees outside the airport and she literally would not take off her sweater or her name tag because it was against the "rules" to break dress code until she was formally released by her stake president. . .

@josesosa3337

3 жыл бұрын

Hold up.

The amount of stress on my mission literally triggered my autoimmune disease and I lost a ton of hair and weight. Also, I don't know if this was a thing in other missions but we had to read from the handbook everyday during companionship study.

@Kayscastle

3 жыл бұрын

Oh wow, I’m so sorry!

@theeight-roadwanderer6286

Жыл бұрын

Yeah same here. I know it's two years later but I had to do the same. I served in Argentina

Went to BYU, and one of my professor's (intro psychology) mission companions had a psychotic break. And he was completely dumbfounded. It's no wonder.

Yeah, I'm hypoglycemic dude. I can't skip meals. They start claiming God will heal my body, my body's gonna show them how acquainted it is with the floor.

@randyjordan5521

3 жыл бұрын

I had an Aussie companion who was hypoglycemic. He could only certain foods, so the whole time we were together, we ate a lot of fish sticks and cabbage. That would produce the most God-awful smelling farts. They smelled like somebody had left a pot full of stewed tomatoes on a stovetop for about a week and forgot about them.

I have a friend whose mom died on his mission. He was allowed to go to the funeral but as soon as the service was over he had to go straight back to the airport, get on a plain, and go back to his mission. He wasn’t even allowed to talk to his family or grief with them. It’s so heartbreaking:(

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Ahhh

@jenniferdeleon6279

Жыл бұрын

This is sick

@astaraoneill9166

8 ай бұрын

Yep. Def a cult!

It's weird hearing all of this makes me want to go on a mission as an undercover ex mormon atheist agnostic. But it seems like hell. There could be a movie about a guy who was undercover and came back as a broken person

@Kayscastle

3 жыл бұрын

Omg

@vmofu7317

Жыл бұрын

I was just thinking that

Tanner, I’m sorry you experienced preventable food trauma. The church has billions. The church should pay members to go on missions and ensure safety, health insurance, and access to food.

@jasongiles3229

3 жыл бұрын

On my mission, I only had to pay $400 a month. In return I got $125 back every month for food, was provided with an Apartment, (that came with furniture appliances, desks, bedding, ect) given health insurance (on top of my family insurance) had a car, and didn't have to pay for gas or insurance. And received many more things in between. So I mean... essentially I paid $375 a month for all of those things so don't be fooled, the Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints Definitely helps out its missionaries a ton.

@jasongiles3229

3 жыл бұрын

@@kennethd.9436 ooof... Should I tell you that I am a Credit Union Teller now or later? Because apparently I am terrible at simple math 😂😂 hahaha but thank you for the correction! But yeah I definitely I agree with you I had it easy for sure! There are definitely missionaries in countries outside the US that don't have it as easy as I did. However, I think you will find the church still provides a lot of things for them. Including free travel, housing, and other living expenses such as money given to them every month to help sustain themselves. I get where you are coming from though, the "Church" does have money, there is no hiding that. So you raise a good point of "Why doesn't the church just pay for everything?". For me personally, It taught me the law of Sacrifice. I live the story in the new testament about the widows mite. Christ didn't tell her "Hey I have enough money, don't worry about paying" instead, she made a sacrifice, and God blessed her for it. So to me, its not about the money, what I paid was honestly very minimal compared to what the church paid towards me and my living expenses. Don't get me wrong, I definitely wish the church paid for all of my mission but, i have a strong testimony that sacrifices bring blessings, so I was willing to pay, and nobody forced me too! 😊 and as far as the price hike goes, I have no issue with it! But I am also open to hearing anything else you have to say 😂

@jasongiles3229

3 жыл бұрын

Also ignore that last laughing emoji, as that was supposed to be a *😊

@kennethd.9436

3 жыл бұрын

Jason Giles Firstly, have you seen the list of the church’s non-profit and for-profit business entities? The church has money. It’s what the church does with money I find offensive. Your tithing and the tithing of the people you baptized are more likely to go to an investment fund than maintaining church buildings. Secondly, what does Jesus need with 35+ billion stock portfolio? Planning to buy cars, phones, and tablets for all the missionaries? www.sltrib.com/religion/2020/03/07/lds-church-discloses/ Lastly, anyone can sacrifice their time, and money to preach their beliefs. Every Scientologist, Catholic, Protestant, Baptist, and Evangelical preacher and missionary feels “blessings” the same way you do. Why?

@jasongiles3229

3 жыл бұрын

@@kennethd.9436 you are probably right. But I mean, I have no problem with my money being invested into investment funds or stocks, if the church turns its money into more money, thats awesome. It just a testimony builder to me honestly. The church does so much good around the World when it comes to humanitarian aid, disaster relief, feeding the poor, helping those in need, and I love it. I understand the church has stocks, it owns a Mall in Downtown SLC, and a lot of farm properties in Florida and California. So I mean, tithing goes to a lot of things, and If the church can turn my 100 a momth in tithing into 10x the amount by investing it in stocks or other things, good for them, because eventually that money is going to come back around one way or another. So anyways, I pay tithing because I believe its the right thing to do. Do I feel I am brainwashed? No. Do I feel forced to do it? No. I just do it because I feel its the right thing to do. 🤗

"That 6 months, your eggs will get dusty and fall right out." 😂😂😂😂

I tried to go on a mission and I couldn't do it. Our MTC "bishop" told us we couldn't even sit on the floor of our room because it was disrespectful. I thought how can I possibly do this for 2 years!?!? Basically had a nervous breakdown and come home. Went into a huge depression that took a long time to work through. I still have nightmares as a grown man that I am sent back to the MTC and even in my dreams, I can't do it!

29:10, this, my best friend in high school was Mormon and her mom died, and it was shocking to me how much of a fight it was for her dad to be able to notify her two brothers on their missions. Adding more difficulties to an already traumatic situation

I wanted to be a missionary sooo bad when I was a kid. Now that I’m older, I realize I just didn’t want to be married to a man before I was even 21, or even just be married to a man lol A year and a half being super close to girls and not worrying about dating men? I wonder why my lesbian self was so interested in the concept......

@katraylor

3 жыл бұрын

I really seriously planned on doing a mission after hearing all the cool travel stories return missionaries would tell. Then I realized I was equally likely to get sent to Iowa or something, and the appeal sort of waned. Did not occur to me at the time that what I wanted was not to "spread the Gospel" so much as to "live in different countries and study languages." Turns out there are other ways to do that. O_o

@Keroanne

3 жыл бұрын

katraylor that’s a big mood too! I wanted to travel to Japan because I was a big anime fan as a child, but now we know that ya dont get to pick 😭

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

You aren't lesbian

@Keroanne

3 жыл бұрын

@@aceuni-rider6921 I'm gonna date your mom if you keep that attitude up, lil itsy bitsy baby boy

@sleepycactusart

3 жыл бұрын

literally same

As someone who is autistic the one that hurt me most is the fake friendships within the church. Nothing hurts more than thinking people genuinely want to be your friend after the love bombing, only for the "friends" who constantly say they "love you" to instantly disappear when - God forbid - you miss church for a month because you're on holiday or looking after your sick kids, because now you MUST be inactive and unworthy. 🙄

@devilsatan2973

Жыл бұрын

Had a similar thing happen to me. I lost faith and when I told a couple of people that I thought were friends, they no longer wanted me as a "friend"! Really? Their loss! To hell with them! Several years later I was in college. There was a girl that I was VERY interested in. She asked about a mission. When I said I didn't go, that was it! I wasn't worth her time after learning this. Really? Only worry about a mission? Don't look at anything else about me? Her loss!

@MsUnknown300

11 ай бұрын

They almost baptized my 16 year old son with Autism. They said they didn't know that he was a Sophomore in high school and not a Sophomore in college. The saddest thing he said to me is that he didn't know how they would treat him now that he wasn't getting baptized.

Not a mormon or former mormon myself, but I am a public librarian and one of the branches I used to work at was near a house where missionaries lived. Every year, a new group. They were allowed to come to the library. There was always one who was clearly the rebel.

When I was younger I was targeted by missionaries. They were really nice. I was in a tight spot and they helped me out. I was new to the city and I I didn't have friends and they took me out to play basketball. It was cool. I thought that they were my friends, but when my questions passed what they were able to answer, they pushed me on to two older missionaries, and they ended the relationship with a five minute conversation. I was really hurt. Then these new guys think I'll just open up to them and trust them in the same way I did the first ones. I was out, and I never met with them again. I ended up becoming a Christian instead. Thank God I'm an Athiest now, though.

Wow imagine working hard and paying money out of your own pocket to be a slave for 2 years 😒

@kennethd.9436

3 жыл бұрын

Amelia Joyner something I’ve read more about is control, freedom, and submission of people to groups. The cultural and familial pressure are a couple of powerful motivators. The missionary basically surrenders control over two years and self/friends/family pay about 10k for the status symbol of a return missionary. Mormons also strongly encourage Mormons to marry only returned missionaries. I know I judged people who hadn’t served missions before I served.

@bossendenwoodconvict

3 жыл бұрын

That's actually WORSE than being a slave...perhaps they should think of a new word for such a person.

@ameliajoyner5220

3 жыл бұрын

@@kennethd.9436 Yes. I remember feeling the same way about men who didn't go om missions.

@rossallen738

3 жыл бұрын

Honestly, I never once felt like a slave on my 2 year mission. I LOVED it. Still the best two years of my life. If I was allowed to do it all over again I'd jump on it. This time I'd bring my wife though.

@ameliajoyner5220

3 жыл бұрын

@@rossallen738 why are you even here? 🤣

I had a terriying, violent, maths teacher at school. She later became our teacher for everything. 30 years later I met her by chance in the street. We talked for nearly two hours, and she missed her hair appointment. She seemed anxious to make ammends. It was a very healing conversation. I wonder if anyone else has had a simmilar, positive experience of meeting someone in authority who they were scared of as a child/young person. Or a negative, awkward experience.

@lilysnape6520

2 жыл бұрын

I grew up in the JW cult myself. In elementary school I started to loving maths but then - actually in ninth grade second round (Teen pregnancy and so I just did that school year again to learn the missed stuff) I had a teacher who was pretty strict. He was an older guy and into informatics. He made a website for our school just to chat and use kind of like facebook. He didn't got the struggles of me being a young mother without much help but later on I recognized him as being actually a caring person and just three years later I saw him as a father figure, even while I never said it to him, because he still was my teacher. In ninth grade I cried in front of him, because I thought of him as way to strict with me and I thought he hated me. But after all he was just a father figure (he also has three sons who have great careers) four years later I cried in front of him, because we had to say good bye, because he stopped working. Sadly I didn't saw him since then, but he was one of the people who made me think more about the cult I grew up in, thinking about what I want, what I could do and who I actually am.

I served in Chile 2015-2017, I got chronic IBS and insomnia from my service, in addition to being mugged, assaulted by a companion and sexually abused by a different companion. At least someone else paid for me to go. I was a convert so I didn’t have a lot of the preconceptions like illness being the result of sinful behavior. Now I understand that’s one of the reasons some of my companions resented me while I was bedridden for several weeks. In your video you asked the question how people in foreign countries reacted to American missionaries around the election of Trump- I had several strangers refuse to talk to me for being American on principle and got called a CIA agent. Members who hinted at their political leanings would ask me what I thought of trump, me being naive and apolitical never having heard no news of the election would respond indifferently and they would either say they liked him or they didn’t care for him- often following up with their opinions on Pinochet. Those who favored trump favored Pinochet and those who didn’t, did not. It’s terrifying to me now to know how many members I was friendly with who would turn 2021 me in to the secret police for being a socialist just like they did to left leaning members back in the day even if they respected me as a missionary.

My older brother went on a mission years ago. It’s so messed up that they can’t even have more communication with family, the rest of their time is dedicated to the church, anyway, and my brother in particular is a very family oriented person. Totally messed him up, he had a really hard time adjusting to real life when he got back and was severely depressed. Maybe a year or two later he wasn’t a member anymore. Also, random tidbit that isn’t directly related to the church’s abuse, a random guy pulled a gun to his head at one point during his mission. He’s alive and fine, but damn, it was all such a traumatic experience for him.

I HATED not having a full p-day so much

@strongallalong89

3 жыл бұрын

This was one of my biggest complaints. You don’t actually get a full day off. And we almost never had any time to do anything fun on P-Day. We had to clean our entire apartment, do all grocery shopping, and write all letters on P Day. By the time that was all done, we didn’t have time for anything fun before heading back out to tract at 6pm.

@Kayscastle

3 жыл бұрын

@@strongallalong89 I can relate to this so much!

Missionaries can call home every week now!! & can get away with calling friends pretty much anytime if their companion isn't too much of a stickler 👀 I know plenty of people who will facetime their friends who are out, and we facetimed a missionary in to an entire wedding the other day. I think it usually isn't approved, but because the church has added a lot more technology to stay relevant (especially google duo/hangouts) it's become somewhat unavoidable. Although I've heard that in some missions, calling home weekly is controlled by the missionary culture... i.e. if you're calling home every week per allowed, you will be shamed and seen as a worse missionary for "needing" that. I was in class at BYU last year when the church announced the weekly calling thing, and the whole room started checking phones and whispering. Finally someone raised his hand, asked the professor if he had a missionary out (he did), and announced that he could call him on his next p-day. It was cool to see. But rather unfortunate that it seemed to come as a move to save the church's ass rather than make a better experience for missionaries, who already suffer far too much abuse 🤦🏼‍♀️

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

Leah M Missionaries aren't abused

@helenr4300

2 жыл бұрын

@@aceuni-rider6921 You can't know how other people have been treated. And it is a defensive reaction - Leah didn't say where the abuse came from, could be the church systems, particular individuals or the community the missionary is serving.....

@lilysnape6520

2 жыл бұрын

@@helenr4300 Also many things, that are explained here are psychological abuse. Not very ''hardcore'' but it is

@nathanolson7840

2 жыл бұрын

@@helenr4300 ask almost any missionary if they were abused and they weren't it gives life meaning and happiness if it makes us happy what is wrong with ut

@mmtittle

Жыл бұрын

@@nathanolson7840they’re literally in a cult. they don’t realize they’re being abused.

The mission rules can prevent people from getting baptized. I taught this guy who had this sort of pick and choose whatever works kind of spirituality and he searched for answers wherever he could. He told us he wanted to help us break free and we were like, "what do you mean by that?" and he answered with a gesture with his arms breaking chains. So the fact that our rules were so strict kept him from wanting to join our church. He might have also been referring to the commandments that the general membership have to follow.

We had so many self made rules. The most rediculous one was that each person in the companionship had to have their specific silverware because we couldn't trust our companion to wash silverware correctly.

@josesosa3337

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds dumb. If someone has a problem with cleaning something properly, talk about it. If they can't learn to clean, we have a problem.

Not a Mormon but I’m fascinated by religions and how they play the mind games. The whole approach to the strict rules was explained once in a video (can’t remember the creator) as the elders purposely kept them strict to differentiate the Mormons from the “outsiders” so that when people do reject them they can then “prove” that Mormons are more welcoming and friendly than the outside world so that these young adults don’t leave. Seeing more of these videos kind of aligns with that view too.

@marksavoia3687

Жыл бұрын

Luke 16:16.... when Jesus ended all religions with one sentence

@trevormiles5852

8 ай бұрын

you lost me at " mind games". Right off the bat you prejudiced your succeeding comments.

So true about the funeral expectations. My oldest brother was on his mission when our mother died. The church talked him out of coming home. I was 14 and didn't understand what unhealthy psychological effects that had on all of us, especially my brother. Even the military will allow their members to go home during a time of war to pay their respects to their unexpected loved one's death.

@carmanfinley58

3 жыл бұрын

My father died while I was on mine. My mission president didn't tell me until two days later because he was busy with missionary interviews. Going home for me wasn't an option, and made me feel less than a good person if I did. I wasn't allowed to call home either, all communication home was to be through him.

@tracieyudichak2315

3 жыл бұрын

@@carmanfinley58 that is so messed up. I don't understand how this religion proclaims families are forever under these circumstances. That definitely makes me mad because of how much I understand how crucial it is for one to mourn their parent's death.

@dorothyreade8591

2 жыл бұрын

A missionary I knew was not allowed to go home for his mother's funeral because it "wasn't necessary."

@tracieyudichak2315

2 жыл бұрын

@@dorothyreade8591 yeah, that's pretty much what the church explained to us, too

@lyndavonkanel8603

Жыл бұрын

@@tracieyudichak2315 I've always heard that Mormons are family centered, renowned for that, so I don't understand the poor treatment, lack of concern and support for the missionaries and their families I'm reading about here.

33:14 I know we miss Obama. I served during Trump’s reign, and people we met who previously had no interest in talking with us made an effort to tell us how ridiculous Trump is once they know we are from America.

@Anniloves21

3 жыл бұрын

I have talked to some now returned sisters and they all cant stand trump. Hopefully they won't vote for him again. He Really Needs to go. Plus they Need to wait with filling die Seat on the Supreme Court.

@svenhanse1028

3 жыл бұрын

@@Anniloves21 Wow! You must live in a serious bubble of false propaganda from main stream media, hollywood, and the highly structured world of social media. If you think Mormonism is centered in structuralism, you've completely been inanely unaware of the absolute obedience required of the socialist/marxist rules of the democratic left now openly broadcast by them. And you are not current if you think Trump is hated by the world. Just the opposite. Obama has been worshiped and Trump vilified due to the never ending lies of the above cited groups, especially the media. But time has and is currently distilling the truth about both, and actions speak louder than the false words of those who desperately seek power to control not only what we say and do, but also what we think, censoring everything that doesn't agree with their controlling agenda, especially our God given, inherent right to think and speak freely, and move about freely and live our lives as we choose, and as protected by our Constitution, which they seek to utterly destroy. The power they seek is yours to give them. They seek your absolute obedience to their rules and regulations. It is only the ignorantly gullible population that gives them any credence. It is Trump who strongly defends and champions the Constitution and our individual liberties and freedoms. That's why he realizes the absolute necessity of any judge, especially a Supreme Court Justice, to follow the law as written in the Constitution, not to legislate from the bench. Our freedoms and liberties to live our lives free from government controlling our every thought and action is now on the line in this election. It is essential that we expend the time and effort to seek the truth from other than main stream media organizations, the main social media platforms, who viciously attack and censor the truth, hollywood and one's social bubble, and realize the devastating consequences to all of our lives if we listen only to their lies.

@vinster9165

3 жыл бұрын

For every person who hates Obama there’s a person who loves him, same goes for Trump. Love him or hate him.

@svenhanse1028

3 жыл бұрын

@@vinster9165 I understand your point, but for many Americans, it's not a matter of "loving Pres. Trump", rather it's about loving the Constitution and our freedoms and liberties. Because it forms the cornerstone of Pres. Trump's actions, and he constantly seeks to defend and uphold the Constitution and our individual rights as citizens, I support Pres. Trump, as do millions of other freedom loving Americans.

I was a VERY BAD missionary. LOL! We would listen to music by "Elder Denver," "Elder Loggins," "Elder McCartney" ... We went swimming a couple of times. On "P-Day," we explored Washington, D.C., Arlington, and Alexandria. Those were truly enjoyable times, except when I had a particularly zealous companion.

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

went skinny dipping once in a river. it was great.

@vinster9165

3 жыл бұрын

Mark Fox tell us about all your Mormon missionary experiences which crossed the line

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

@@vinster9165 showering with companion, skinny dipping too. We tried to stay out of view. Never got caught, reprimanded, etc.

@lyndavonkanel8603

Жыл бұрын

😉😅I like those "elders" too. Good for you! Those activities helped you keep your sanity.

Mine was fairly liberal. Coke was encouraged, because some studies show it kills parasites. We were allowed music, but only if it still allowed you to feel the "spirit" (this one was... liberally interpreted). They let us wear really loose pants, like with 24 inch cuffs, because it was cooler. Also, we could watch movies, but only on p-day, only with the rest of the zone/district, and only Disney and Star Wars. Besides that, everything was pretty standard.

@hellaboveme500

3 жыл бұрын

Like cocaine coke or

@emir5009

3 жыл бұрын

Bro were did they send u . Heaven like foreal

@danielhansen6991

3 жыл бұрын

Like Strippers, Blow, and Metal 🤣🤣

@joannathemadd

Жыл бұрын

Parasites???

I had no idea you had to PAY to go!! Plus how do you still afford college after? That really just adds to the crazyiness for me. At least Catholic (what I was raised) missonaries & priests & nuns and what not get their cost of living/housing covered.

I too was encouraged to emigrate from England to the US by missionaries. Not so disciplined, they spent hours with us, even stayed overnight one time. I was only 14 when I was baptized but married at 19 in CA to a returned missionary. I am no longer married and no longer active in the church. I can’t believe my thinking back then and that people are so indoctrinated now. Freedom is wonderful!

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

!!!!

@learningisfun2108

3 жыл бұрын

Jan Parkes Yes, freedom is wonderful. It saddens me that so many give up their freedom willingly because of some belief that “feels good”.

I feel like Tanner and I are so similar in so many ways: -Extremely similar, workaholic mission cultures -Hyper-devout before and for some time after the mission -Had funding issues on mission and I actually have food-trauma as a result too lol -Totally had a spending complex on my mission too. On my last week, the "edgiest" thing I did was by a $20 Pez dispenser kit to remind me of my mission, and a (literal) $1 wal mart cup, and I was torn up about it -I *100%* floundered when people would ask "what did [the prophet] say?" and would make up some generic gospel-filler. r/relate. -Literally had a nightmare about my mission last night. -Literally still have parasites (I think tanner said in one video that he got one?) -Escaped the church because I was doing research to help others stay strong P.S. Did you know someone tallied up how much time it would take to do everything listed in the White Bible (white handbook) + Preach My Gospel and it came out to 26 hours a day, without sleep :o Pretty sure the White bible alone comes out to 18 hours a day with no breaks (which is still awake 2 hours longer than you're "supposed" to be awake for). Either way, the mission rules are *literally* (unless you possess a time turner) impossible to follow.

@kelleren4840

3 жыл бұрын

@noneya bizness agreed 100%. All excellent reasons for why I'm an atheist now.

@williamjameslehy1341

3 жыл бұрын

So you're not supposed to buy souvenirs of the place you're sent? Do they explain why? You'd think the church high-ups would be pleased that you had such fond memories of your mission that actually wanted to remember it.

@kelleren4840

3 жыл бұрын

@@williamjameslehy1341 it's not that you're not supposed to buy souvenirs, per se, it was more that you are given a monthly allowance of money to cover living expenses and you are NOT supposed to spend it on anything except like... Food. For example, my pants ripped and I literally had to buy... pants (cuz I had no other slacks), and I didn't have any personal spending money (virtually my whole mission). So I had to call the mission president and get special permission to use a week's worth of grocery money on slacks. He was NOT happy I didn't have personal money to use instead but didn't really have a choice (cuz. I needed pants). But yeah, at least when I went (from 2013-2015) they were SUPER specific about what you were/weren't allowed to spend it on. And if you didn't have parents/friends/family sending you "personal" money, you were SOL if you wanted anything outside of groceries.

I'm stressed out just listening to this! LOL

My dad got sick on his mission, almost died so he had to go home for a few months before going back out and his sickness effected him for over 20 years before he finally got surgery

@whitemailprivilege2830

3 жыл бұрын

Cool story bro

My older sister had always had issues with her body image and issues with eating, and when she went on her mission the developed severe anorexia and was only sent back when she was on the verge of needing to be hospitalized. My parents had ignored the signs for years and even after it was very obvious she was not okay they try and hide it because they don't want out perfect family reputation to be tarnished. Oh and don't even get me started on when my brother got caught hooking up with a boy on his mission...

@learningisfun2108

3 жыл бұрын

kirstenelise larsen It scares me how important “reputation” is to religious families, even to the point of causing serious harm to individuals and relationships. It is just another example of religious hypocrisy which would shock Jesus (or should I say, the myth that Jesus has become?).

There are all the ridiculous contrived rules in the Handbook -- and then there are the rules the mission president adds on top (like clapping in the bathroom and reporting your daily schedules) and de facto expectations pushed on missionaries by each other and local members. The way it's set up so missionaries and local members also police each other. So many parallel with how all unjustified hierarchies in society are upheld.

Thank you for reading actual missionary rules. I've always thought it is Mormon military training. Forces to support the church, but not the nation. Men who served in the military (during Vietnam) were still treated as less than those who served missions. Women were afterthoughts. It started as a way to increase Utah population with an eye to Brigham Young's dream of a separate Mormon country. Had the Confederacy won, Utah would likely have joined since they were ok with slavery. Cultlike? Hell, yes.

You two need to make a series reviewing “lds cinema” .

@philliparoy1452

3 жыл бұрын

the amount of times i watched johnny lingo lol 😂

@ASMRyouVEGANyet

3 жыл бұрын

Would love that

I had cancer on my mission, was held hostage and had to eat MTC food for 16 weeks. Where's my Scarlett Johansson look-alike wife?

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

You had cancer on your mission?! Holy shit I’m so sorry!

@exmodeadpool

3 жыл бұрын

@@ZelphOntheShelf I got injured when I was going downhill on a sled, at the age of 6 or 7. My family and I didn't take proper care of it till I started mission preparation. The doctors in Яussia weren't very effective, but they told me I was fine. When I was at the MTC, my thigh began to hurt a lot. I was sent to see a doctor. After the first tests, I was called to the office of my MTC District President and told that my doctor will be there, as well. I was like: "Hm... my doctor and my priest want to see me... That can't be good!" Basically, they told me I had Sarcoma and will die in 4 years. I was fine with that. 2 years to serve, then travel and enjoy my short life... 🙂 With each new test the diagnosis was getting better and after a couple surgeries and a few months of physical therapy, I was able to walk again. The surgeries were done in Huntsman's Cancer Center. The tumor was tested there and in Atlanta. The doctors said they new saw anything like that before, but they think it was benign. Since it was a new type, I asked the doctors to name it after my ex girlfriend. Both her and the tumor were big parts of my life and both left scars when they were removed. 😁

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

"Held hostage" 😂🤪

@Carlosk12

3 жыл бұрын

*People who served in latinoamerica* WAIT U GUYS ARE GETTING FOOD? But fr man sorry that hear that

@plamondonworks6948

3 жыл бұрын

@@aceuni-rider6921 they literally have your travel documents, and some presidents will not give them back until you threaten legal action, so yes.

My girlfriends daughter went on a mission and after the mission she had a really hard time adjusting to life outside of the Mission. The regiment was so tough that she could not adjust to make her own schedule. Her mother had to help her to get back to normal life. So she immediately got married and had a baby.

@ZelphOntheShelf

2 жыл бұрын

:/

Fun fact- thee and thou used to actually be used in informal language and thus thee what’s shortened to become the through a process due to ease of articulation (basically it was informal and people wanted to make it easier and shorter to say)

My cousin is a mormon and just got back from her mission, and we've barely spoken for over a year because of the rules. When I'd hear from her in the emails she'd send to all her friends and family, she used exclamation marks after every sentence. I think we're gonna talk on the phone today, it'll be interesting to see how it goes. We've both probably changed a lot, I hope we can still be friends

I know the parallels are almost too spot on when comparing Mormons to the religious control and behaviors of the Pharisees during Roman rule, but it still saddens me that the go-to term for hypocritical and judgenental is just a historical sect within Judaism. People use the term Pharisee outside of historical and religious context and it made me realize how many terms like cabal, zealot, and Pharisee have these negative stereotypes because our society is built so much on Christian contempt for and blame towards Judaism.

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Interesting!

@TheCutiepuffs

3 жыл бұрын

Another interesting terminology difference to consider is the terms “old” and “new” testament. I prefer the terms Hebrew and Christian Bible. Another thing to read if you’re interested: www.google.ca/amp/s/m.jpost.com/opinion/fundamentally-freund-stop-calling-it-the-old-testament-483640/amp www.google.ca/amp/s/m.huffpost.com/us/entry/7456408/amp

@lukaj679

3 жыл бұрын

@@TheCutiepuffs I've heard Jewish people dismissing those terms as further enmeshing Christianity and Christian perspectives onto their own historical texts. I feel it's better to distinguish between the Tanakh and the Old Testament since each interprets and translates text differently.

@TheCutiepuffs

3 жыл бұрын

Luka TM ive heard so many opinions on it. My Judaism prof preferred the term hebrew bible as an academic/non-Jewish, that’s why I like it, but it is certainly open for debate

@TheCutiepuffs

3 жыл бұрын

Luka TM and yea, the Christian version of the hebrew bible is not the same at all-but calling it “old“ and prescribing “archaic”characteristics to it is problematique

When I was in college my good friend and I were talked to by a missionary. It was the missionary and the two of us. I don't remember ever seeing his companion. Also, the missionary and my good friend developed a relationship that was less than platonic.

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Damn!

@lgperkins

3 жыл бұрын

@@ZelphOntheShelf Yeah... I walked in on some interesting things. Nothing was ever done to the missionary though.

@aureliagold1222

3 жыл бұрын

@@lgperkins They were definitely doing something missionary, would you say?

@lyndavonkanel8603

Жыл бұрын

@@aureliagold1222 Oh!

Just catching up on your videos. Great discussion and sharing. I didn't know anything about Mormon's, this is so interesting.

My ex sister in law had to come home bc she was so sick. Like deathly sick. She begged the bishop and the church leaders to allow her to come home. But once she was home she started to feel a lot better. It was hard seeing her go through that. Especially after she fought so hard to go on the mission to begin with bc of her age.

I served from 2005-2007. We were required to use an email that the church had setup. This email was inferior to free products of the time. It would time out while you were writing your email and so you might spend most of your hour on an email, click send and have the whole thing time out. My mom kept all my emails in a binder and you can see the weeks this happened because I basically had no time to rewrite the email. I got in the habit of copying and pasting my emails before clicking send. By the end of my mission I started using my Hotmail account, gasp. One other creepy note, the church has all those emails stored somewhere. I don’t think they censored them but they probably did have some sort of data mining going on.

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

Seems extremely likely!

@maxerickson12

3 жыл бұрын

Oooh! I forgot this happened to me multiple times as well. Served from 2012-2014.

@marcmielke

Жыл бұрын

@@ZelphOntheShelf Why else would they insist you would use their completely insufficient product.

This video brings back so many experiences that are just so traumatic. I hated my mission so much and I hate it so much more now.

i remember one missionary said about how them and their companion found a box full of state Doritos and that fed them for a few weeks... i’m sorry what 😃😃 that’s literally so bad that they were hungry enough to have to eat stale doritos they found in the street

You two make me laugh! This faith transition can be so hard emotionally at times and it's nice to know I have somewhere to turn to get a laugh. Keep doing what you're doing! Thanks!

@LittleMissLion

3 жыл бұрын

It gets better, I promise.

I am no longer a member of the church, but my whole family still belongs. I do my best to respect their choices even when I disagree, but something I really admired was when my little sister returned from her mission and was telling me about it, she said that the hardest thing for her was that she felt obligated to follow this handbook even when she felt the spirit was directing her otherwise. I was very proud of her for standing up for what she believed in and what she felt to be true in her gut even when her mission president (and sometimes companions) would get mad at her for being an individual and having her own thoughts. EDITING TO ADD: My sister lived in a house with toxic mold inside the walls for about 6 weeks on her mission. Doctors couldn't figure out what was making her and her companion so sick. It wasn't until it started growing out of the walls and into the window sills that they saw it and were able to get out of that house. It took everything in me not to buy a plane ticket to her mission to beat her mission president. It took her more than 6 months after she got home to be feeling better from the damage it caused and we don't know if she will have problems later on from it.

When I was in High School my best friend’s dad died. He, found him… But what sickens me is his older sister who was on a mission was not allowed to come home. WTF! I was told because the Dad was already dead. But the church failed to realize that a whole family was suffering. The church made his sister decided between her religion and confirming her family.

20 years old is not grown. If, for instance, you get sick at 20 - it's easy to fall through the cracks because you're too young to be treated like an adult and too old to be treated like a child -- by medical professionals and hospital staff. Young adult cancer survivor here -- I know this first hand. 20 years old may be legal age, but a 20 year old is still a developing youth that needs guidance and care. I consider Mormon missions - *CHILD ABUSE* and should be discontinued immediately. No, I did not fit in well at the ice cream socials....

Thanks Tanner and Samantha for talking freely and sharing your experience. So much good to do and accomplish. Keep up the great work and content!😁👍❤

@ZelphOntheShelf

3 жыл бұрын

THANKS HEATH! 💜💜

I am totally fascinated by this LDS culture/cult. Don’t know why but it’s crazy. Like watching a reality tv show. 🍿

Oh my gosh, so true. Listening to this I helped me process even more abuses of the mission experience I had been conditioned to ignore ... it was wrong on so many levels.

i wish we could get our tithing money back, and for your two years labor they owe you about $45,000.

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

more than that

@rebeccahinner1572

3 жыл бұрын

Well, except for that volunteering part...

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

He agreed to volunteer service. You don't get paid for that.

@vinster9165

3 жыл бұрын

Write a book and get that money back

Joining and going to the temple reminded me of A Christmas Story when Ralphie finally gets the secret message decoder ring and it's "drink more Ovaltine." The "opening of the heavens in the fullness of times " turned out to be "pay your tithing."

14:38 My mom legitimately had to explain to our Stake President that jokes like “the more you pray the hotter your wife will be” should not be said causally in talks as a joke. It was probably only because she’s the wife of a former member of Stake Presidency and current Bishop, and that she used some of the things I had witnessed among the Young Women (I was at that point very respected by the adults in the church because of my perceived obedience and knowledge of the scripture) as an example of how that could be damaging. Once there where three of these jokes in a single Stake Conference. As I’ve distanced myself from the church I often feel a deep discomfort in the fact that I or any other young women would be used as reward for a man’s righteousness. Ack. It makes me sick.

9:15 my parents would always tell me that if I didn't use thee/thou/they while praying, "heavenly father" wouldn't answer my prayers because using common language is disrespectful.

Okay this is soooooooo eye opening and soooo helpful, I have been receiving young missionaries at my house and they are young so I thought we could be friends but I understand their attitude now. Wow!

Whoa. Thank you both for this explanation. Education will help make changes.

I served a mission in Massachusetts back in 1998. Because I was just diagnosed with seizures I had to wait to go. But about 10 month into my mission I fell down a flight of stairs and broke my right shoulder. Because of that they kept me off from prosliting.

@ZelphOntheShelf

Жыл бұрын

!!!!!

I can relate so much to what you guys talked about on this video!! I served my mission from 2011-2013 and while parts of my mission were great other parts were dreadful. I really did love the people that I taught and developed great relationships with the people where i served. The parts that were dreadful had all to do with the rules and the culture of mission that i thought I had to live up to. Like these guys talk about in the video I thought i was the worst person on the planet if I didnt follow all the mission rules perfectly. I remember my mission president telling me that God expected me to be perfect. This fucked me up and caused me sooo much anxiety. I thought I had to earn Gods love, and since no matter how hard i tried i could never be perfect so God was always dissapointed in me. I had no self worth whatsoever and No matter what I did it was never good enough. I contemplated suicide as a missionary, and I was afraid to tell anybody that because if I did i would be told I was feeling like that because I wasnt being completely obedient. I felt like I was brainwashed as a missionary as well. Like that our church was the only true church and all other churches were wrong. The prophet was a mouthpiece for God and whether it came from Gods mouth or the mouth of his servants (the prophets) it was the same. If I challeneged anything that the church or my mission president taught I was scolded and was told to exercise faith and be exactly obedient. Today I am in a much better spot and am now able to think for myself instead of what the leaders of the church tell me to do. I feel like today that I dont need to follow all these commandments to earn Gods love. He loves me and accepts me for who I am today. I dont believe that the Mormon church is the only true and living church on the earth today. I like to drink coffee and get tattoos. Im much more open and accepting of other peoples way of life and if it works for them and makes them happy then im all for it. Im much more happy and have a lot more peace in my life today then I was when I was a missionary.

This video makes me SO glad I didn't serve my mission!!! It was going to be way to much money, I wasn't attracted to the idea of getting baptisms, and I'm gay so I was very worried about getting a hot companion lol.

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

my companion and I had a few "fun nights".

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

@kiwibrown Yup. Twice. then felt guilty and stopped.

@markfox5349

3 жыл бұрын

@kiwibrown yep all the way all the way and then even more all the way

Only just discovered this channel - strikes a very good balance between fun and serious.

I remember 2 months in, I realized I wouldn't be allowed to sleep in past 630 until 16 months later, and I immediately felt old and tired.

@brennanfjord

3 жыл бұрын

Bethany Noakes sounds like a personal decision,their are 8 hours of sleep planned for everyone. Everyone on this thread and video seriously complaining about waking up at 6:30? Seriously? Grow up and be responsible. 99% of successful people in life, wake up at the time.

@bethanynoakes771

3 жыл бұрын

@@brennanfjord 😂😂😂 sure dude 😂😂😂

@AChickAndADuck

3 жыл бұрын

I was exhausted for my entire mission. I’m someone who needs at least 9 hours of sleep.

Me watching this as an ex Mormon whose little bro is going on a mission next month lol. Love your vids! Interesting timing w how my bro is leaving soon

Thoroughly enjoyed your video!! I did not go on a mission but I grew up in the church and left about 5 years ago after 19 years of being brainwashed. I always knew that there were a lot of rules to follow on a mission but wow.. I had no idea it was like this, eye opening and frankly quite disturbing!

Actually, I glad I served my mission. Because on the mission I finally admitted that religion - is a fucking false :) I’m from Russia, my family joined the Church when I was 3 years old. I served in New York City in 2016-2018, when I was 26-28, already having a law degree and three years of law practicing experience. So it was a little bit different experience than for other missionaries. But all these rules and other mission work stuff from the inside showed me finally that I should left the church and religion. And now I finally feel free and happy.

@aceuni-rider6921

3 жыл бұрын

Enrique Serruto Diaz I hope that you can return to your relationship with God and Jesus Christ.

@enriquesd69

3 жыл бұрын

Ace Uni-Rider Why?

@josephrobi6806

3 жыл бұрын

Enrique Serruto Diaz you need a saviour not a church

@PeterLambert2211

3 жыл бұрын

I was in the New York New York North mission. Which mission were you on?

@enriquesd69

3 жыл бұрын

@kiwibrown no, the thing is that I came to conclusion that doctrines of Bible is false. Book of Mormon’s false was the result. For me all the Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Islam and Judaism) are false.

Fun fact about the "thee/thou" thing. In the 15th and 16th century, "you/your" was used for those above you (kings, lords, and presumably God." The use of "thee/thou" was used for the common people, for those below or on the same level as you

@vinster9165

3 жыл бұрын

Natalie Palmer Swanson source?

@BellDavidE

3 жыл бұрын

In the King James Bible, however, "thee/thy/thou" are consistently singular and "you/your" are always plural, following after the earlier English bibles and and early general usage, so I understand. It was a good and proper way of distinguishing between singular and plural, "thee" vs "you" rather than "you" vs. "y'all" (not to say I'd like to go back to it, however!).

@helenr4300

2 жыл бұрын

as compared to french tu - singular and familiar vs vous for formal, respect for those you don't know or 'above' you and for plural. Using the informal/personal tu in the wrong situation can be offensive, disrespectful. The pattern is also seen in other languages including Welsh.

Such a mixed bag for me. I’m no longer a believing Mormon (agnostic), but I actually did have a really terrific mission experience, overall. There were certainly parts of it that were awful. Obviously a good number of the rules just get downright absurd (can’t leave the sight of your companion unless you’re in the bathroom, for example) but I honestly felt like leaving behind books, movies, regular communication with friends and family, and material pursuits for 2 years was good for me in the long run. It really forced me to overcome my materialistic desires and focus on what matters most. I dunno if anyone else felt the same?

@cpbearden

3 жыл бұрын

strongallalong89 same here. My mission was a lot of fun for the most part. And I learned a foreign language that I use at work every day. Now I just look back and laugh at how dumb I was as a 19 year old oblivious TBM and am grateful I didn’t have much success in converting people lol

@plamondonworks6948

3 жыл бұрын

I feel like you can just learn that by going on a long trip without the brainwashing and emotional abuse lol. I lived in the Philippines for 2 years as a exmo and I learned to be grateful and not be so materialistic from that a LOT more that my mission. And I dont have nightmares about having to go back like I do for my mission lol

@tinman3586

2 жыл бұрын

@@plamondonworks6948 Yeah but it's hard to find the structure to do that, most people can't just up and go live somewhere for 2 years. The only real comparable frame work for that is military service.

@brendatroth3860

2 жыл бұрын

I would not let my son's go on a mission. My oldest son is high functioning autistic and the church was still pressuring me to send him on a mission. Their compromise was to keep him in the USA but still he could not contact his mom but twice per year. That would have destroyed my son. The church drove my younger son away from the religion all together by literally cornering him and confronting him at church and trying to force him into going to Seminary 5 morning per week and becoming a missionary. I spoke to several of the elders who were pressuring my son and informed them, "He is my child and takes a bus to a Magnet school clear across town and therefore could not make it to school on time if he went to Seminar because he would miss the bus." There answer was for me drive him to school everyday after Seminar and I could be late for work everyday. Gee I guess it would be fine for me to loose my job so I can what, stay home and make more babies. I do not think so! Then they told me regarding becoming a Missionary that my son could choose for himself when he turns 18. REALLY! Well I am his mom and I have the say! My sons no longer attend church services. But they still live by the Mormon rules of clean living.

The passive aggressive friendliness on Tanner's face on the thumbnail is stunning!

I am new to this channel and I just want to say I was not expecting to feel so called out today in worrying how my mission has effected my ability to deeply connect with people 😂 thank you guys for the work you do and things you share Edit later on in the video. My brother and his wife died while I was on my mission and I definitely felt pressure to stay on my mission and that's what I did. I regret it now.

@ZelphOntheShelf

9 ай бұрын

💜💜💜💜

it’s funny bc i’m not and have never been a mormon but i had a massive faith crisis at 14 that found me jumping around trying to find something to believe in. JWs came up, general christianity came up, mormonism (which was very similar to the islam that had started the whole faith crisis thing) came up and i felt so lost and confused. i never followed any other religion, not really, but i ended up learning so much about so many different faiths, even outside of abrahamic religions, it was unbelievable. i ended up pushing through, past atheism even, to general lack of belief in any singular diety or similar. and i became so much happier that way. 5 years later during lockdown, however, i got messages from a mormon missionary in my university city asking about my belief in faith and the power of prayer. for years i’d actually already consumed your content along with loads of other exmuslims, exJWs, exmormons etc etc but i really wanted to hear from someone on the other side. the thing i learned about missionaries, though, is that if you give them an inch, they WILL take a mile. i asked questions about missions, about life as a mormon, about baptism, about everything i could think of, but of course the one thing i hadn’t realised about missionaries is that they will always keep the end goal in sight. you see yourself becoming dehumanised under the gazes, tools and stepping stones to true enlightenment, and i could see that answers that didn’t stretch any further beyond ‘trust in the Lord’ weren’t very forthcoming. i tried to follow their lead, maybe even hint that i was into it- maybe i could get answers that way. but 1) i got bored and 2) it felt like they never listened past anything that could get me baptised. i think im the type of person who wants to know everything about everyone and who wants to live and experience anything, so the deep interest and curiosity i had in a life that was parallel to mine but so different was the only thing really keeping me talking to them. i started feeling bad for them, to be honest, and this video is just confirming all of that. they’re supervised even more now, if that’s possible. this new, covid-friendly, super modern Facebook-messenger-style missionary work means they don’t necessarily have to be face to face with the nameless masses, but it does mean they’re in an environment where people feel more empowered to be cruel. so i was as nice as i could be. i even attended two online church sessions💀. i hoped i could be an ambassador from the non-mormon side of things, make sure they knew that we’re not a group of sad, lonely, vaguely evil entities anymore than they are. unfortunately, it didn’t work like that. the elder that had been originally talking to me had obviously been doing so with his companion, even if the messages came from his account. i was aware of this, but then i realised just how little they saw non-mormons as people to save and more as people to prove that THEY are good missionaries when he put me in a gc with his companion and then left to go to another country😭 and this new guy was even more adamant that we discuss nothing more than the book of mormon lol. i ended up reading 1 nephi by myself past midnight just to show that i was trying to connect and understand. what i should have realised is that they had neither the time nor the inclination to extend that much courtesy on their end. it’s interesting because ofc they seem like nice people and i’m sure they are, but religion (more specifically mission work) isolates you from others not like you so much that even when your interactions seem social they never quite are. and those who are trying to connect from the other side will always seem like threats. it’s really sad and i wish i knew how to fix that😞 when i was trying to formulate questions for those guys i really loved watching your videos so thank you for that:) i also took notes from the CES letter itself😳. suffice it to say for a non mormon i definitely know way too much about mormonism lol. thanks for all you do! who knows, maybe without you guys i would be a mormon right now. sorry about the rambling tho. what can you do eh

@mooseymcflurffycat3018

Жыл бұрын

Bruh, yeah. So true.

People in Яussia have mixed feelings about Trump. In the beginning everyone loved him and thought he would help Яussia. Now, even our TV propagandists don't know when to hate him and when to love.

@ThunderTaker1215

3 жыл бұрын

Trump is a criminal, it’s hard to imagine him helping anyone but himself.

@exmodeadpool

3 жыл бұрын

@@ThunderTaker1215 Everyone is a villain in somebody else's story. Яussians thought that he was a friend or even a mole working for Putin. Hence, if he was controlled by Яussia, he could've had helped its interests.

I haven't thought about these in a long time (went to a mission on 2003 - 2005). Damn, this shit was very disturbing and triggering to watch but your beautiful humor and witty commentary made it bearable . Thank you for being such awesome people, love you.

I sometimes felt relieved when P-day was over because it felt more intense in some ways than the other days: you had to cram in so many things you had to get done that it often wasn't relaxing at all.