Get on Squarespace: squarespace.com/BLAZE

@Zalor666

3 жыл бұрын

it was memed so hard i actually started playing raid shadow legends lol

@declancotter722

3 жыл бұрын

The bookstore is waterstone's and it's still open

@aaronberta3958

3 жыл бұрын

Ok tho but the Darwin Awards are so funny

@aaronberta3958

3 жыл бұрын

Connecticut was named by Europeans

@obsidian_oki

3 жыл бұрын

Where ETA

The ADHD loading bar had me in stitches. Grant Meme-boy a cookie.

@skaerup

3 жыл бұрын

He deserves the whole jar for that one 🤣

@MrJoshua05

3 жыл бұрын

Was it just me or was everyone hoping he got the whole rant in before the end of status bar

@Locutus

3 жыл бұрын

@@MrJoshua05 Just you.

@deemariedubois4916

3 жыл бұрын

@@Locutus LMAO!

@silojin

3 жыл бұрын

Too good

ADHD Loading....Sam’s best meme ever.

@narmale

3 жыл бұрын

im laughing... so... hard... xD

@liambranstetter6859

3 жыл бұрын

It would only be better if it buffered when he paused

@ItsAsparageese

3 жыл бұрын

@@liambranstetter6859 🤣 oh god yes

@ItsAsparageese

3 жыл бұрын

I need one of these loading bars IRL to warn me when I'm starting to get baby-manic and about to launch into full ramble mode lol

@TheSassygrasshopper

3 жыл бұрын

110 percent agreed best meme and perfectly suited to simon

Simon: "Danny writes these really long intros" Also Simon: *goes off onto long disjointed rants*

@carmenburton4918

3 жыл бұрын

And as soon as simon does ..my mind always edits in ("And so it begins" in a Morgan freeman's voice) every single time

@NightridingDoom

3 ай бұрын

we know who danny is xd

The ADHD loading bar... f#*%ing EPIC! My boss is looking at me like I'm an absolute knob. I don't care. THAT WAS FUNNY! Sam you're a LEGEND!

When it is all said and done, Danny shall publish a book called: “Long Introductions, Screaming Coke Benders, and Rick Rolls: My Long Time Chained to a Radiator (Allegedly).”

@Cman04092

3 жыл бұрын

I can't wait to read that one, it sounds interesting.

@Me-pe5xl

2 жыл бұрын

(Allegedly) is what makes that title perfection. I wonder how long the introduction is. Probably takes up a whole third of the book.

How dare Simon make fun of Sam for his editing skills when we all saw Sam's perfect commercial a couple episodes ago and then he perfectly times Simon's yelling into Yoko Ono's screaming perfect absolute perfection from our resident chief editor in vintage memology

@jaymevosburgh3660

3 жыл бұрын

Yoko Whistler.

@hakmanp.8702

3 жыл бұрын

Probably this video was recorded way before the Magic Spoon commercial... but definitely after the Rooting turtle one .. someone needs to make a Cronological list of Business Blaze videos

@SymbioteMullet

3 жыл бұрын

@@hakmanp.8702 such dark magic is not a thing for mortals to tangle with

@erikkornfeld785

3 жыл бұрын

The meme Lord is an excellent video editor.

@jesseh2069

3 жыл бұрын

@@SymbioteMullet oo

Has anyone thought that Simon may just have multiple personalities and Sam and Danny don’t even exist? They only exist in the basement of Simons mind. 🧐

@danielmclellan1522

3 жыл бұрын

I mean, I'm not convinced they're not the ones keeping Simon in the basement, living off Magic Spoon and desperately hoping for KFC just for some variety in his diet.

@narmale

3 жыл бұрын

what EVA!?

@Foolish188

3 жыл бұрын

@@danielmclellan1522 Simon doesn't look like he could be frequenting KFC very often.

@evillttlimp

3 жыл бұрын

@@Foolish188 Well, maybe he burns a lot of calories running around in circles in the basement

@willmfrank

3 жыл бұрын

"Sam" and "Danny" are the names of two of Simon's many clones.

I would love to see Danny and Simon emails. "Danny your writing made no sense." ... "Simon you skipped a paragraph" "I did not".... checks paper.... "I apologize" "Can I leave the basement?" "No but you get to eat tonight"

the fact "daddy chill" is the most used meme in this show tells something about Simon's mind state

@ashishsb9075

3 жыл бұрын

Coming 2nd would be the "is it crack?" Meme.

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

I've started saying it in my everyday life.

@Remianen

3 жыл бұрын

No way. The ADHD breakdown one is going to be in HEAVY rotation, I think. Simon diverges from the script so far sometimes, he forgets he has a script!

@jorge23483

3 жыл бұрын

It was a while since one of Simon's spontaneous Yoko-rants 🤣... Please, someone make a compilation video to use as a rickrolling 🙏.

@zengaisfamous

3 жыл бұрын

I really hope daddy chill gets retired, this channel has ruined it for me

That intro scream (I imagine) is the celebratory noise Simon makes when he comes up with a new channel idea while high on coccaine..."Allegedly"... 😂

@wut274

3 жыл бұрын

Also I love how cheesy Simons grin is in the thumbnail 😁😁😁😂🤣

@Raine_lrr

3 жыл бұрын

And the voice training is paying off... Allegedly

@nellom.8771

3 жыл бұрын

@@Raine_lrr yes he almost sounds human

@antonioarroyas7662

3 жыл бұрын

My face went numb when this video started playing.

@_konkrit_

3 жыл бұрын

Broughtt to you by business blaze, Simon giving birth

"Get back to the point, Fact-Boy!" That brought me to tears

Simon a few weeks ago: “I have to limit shouting and try to keep it down during Business Blaze videos because of my voice” Simon now: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH”

@savannahhenley7728

3 жыл бұрын

He has to tell from the belly, according to his vocal coach, allegedly

ADHD Loading is my new favorite BB meme

Shout out to Technology Connections. (Nods approvingly).

Danny doesn't need to write long intros or segments; he can just insert the instruction "Simon rambles on about what he can't remember for 45 seconds".

We need a video where Simon just "forgets" the script and just rambles for the full 30m.

Business Blaze in a nutshell: Storytime with Simon, his encaged slave friends Danny & Sam. 10% story, 90% Memes & OGBB injokes

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

And occasionally 1% facts that don't need to be alleged.

@hakmanp.8702

3 жыл бұрын

you're complaining??

@rackneh

3 жыл бұрын

@@hakmanp.8702 Ofcourse not. I only wish it was called Theranos Blaze, that's all.

@JasonW.

3 жыл бұрын

@@rackneh Enron Blaze

@Digitalhunny

3 жыл бұрын

And, the longer the intro. the better the Blaze! 💖

Simon is like that uncle that has a lot of interesting stores to tell, but he ends up going on so many long winded tangents that he never finishes them

@zachwise476

3 жыл бұрын

Creepy looking uncle who smells like coffee and dried wood and looks down at you in a judging manner, knowing that you are probably a better person than he is.

@valentinemcdermott

3 жыл бұрын

@@zachwise476 That is very specific...

@idiotwidowmaker8932

3 жыл бұрын

@@valentinemcdermott but very relatable

the ADHD loading bar is never going to get old. i love everything about it.

You okay, Simon? Sam had to add a record amount of the infamous *"Daddy, chill!"* memes to this one.

oh my god! that ADHD loading bar cracked me up so hard, thought for sure that Sam was just messing with us based on the slow loading speed, but no. The madlad actually did it! Next level rambling right there ^^

Man that ADHD loading bar got me for good, good stuff from the vintage meme expert.

Yoko was absolutely ground breaking. She proved success and talent are not related

Mr. Whistler, whatever they put in your Magic Spoon today you may want to use it in moderation in the future. Epic. Legendary. I'll never hear Yoko Ono again without imagining your primal scream disintegrating her.

I second that recommendation for Technology Connections - I've been following that channel from the early days and Alec has the unique ability to cause a massive price spike on vintage Sunbeam toasters. Allegedly I still remember Circuit City during its prime in the early-mid 90s - the stores used a showroom format where you would talk to an associate if you wanted to buy something and it would roll out on a conveyer belt near the entrance for pickup. I bought my VCR from them (I actually looked at a few on Amazon of all places while shopping around, as they had started to branch beyond just books) and later a DVD player (without DivX)

Simon "sam can't meme" also simon: "how did my computer get two windows installs on it?"

The loading bar was gold. Epic work Sam.

Ok.... We all gotta make this happen. How can we make KFC a sponsor for Business Blaze?!?! Let's GO people!!! 🔥🍗🔥

@marcbeebee6969

3 жыл бұрын

#kfc #love #businessblaze

That ADHD loading bar is killing me!!!

This video 100% proves that a side channel of ADHD Blaze needs to be a thing, all the rants, off-script moments, random asides and just general loss of focus edited into episodes as long as danny's intros... :P

@kelleygreenEmpressOne

3 жыл бұрын

That's a fantastic idea!!!

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

And clip montages odd Simon saying or doing the same thing over and over again, set to EDM!

@kelleygreenEmpressOne

3 жыл бұрын

@@LizRealGirlBeauty also a wonderful idea!!

@marcbeebee6969

3 жыл бұрын

And no tragic spoon commercials!! Only ETA 5g underwear commercials are ok

I feel like Sam has a hard drive filled with memes, enough to have just about any sort of conversation without ever once moving his lips.

One of these days Sam is going to kill me with an unexpected Hannibal meme when I'm trying to eat a salad.

Okay everyone, you have your marching orders! Everyone buy Simon a copy of Yoko Ono's book and mail it to him! It's clearly all he wants in life!

@randallflagg9498

3 жыл бұрын

They will all most likely not make it to him. He said once or twice before that everything he gets sent tends to get stuck at customs.

@ilajoie3

3 жыл бұрын

@@randallflagg9498 time to use a VPN and order from Amazon and have it sent to him

@aaronwinfree8662

3 жыл бұрын

Also her used unwashed undies.

@carrioncrow8191

3 жыл бұрын

He’ll send it right back, customs are a bitch

@deadmansfire

3 жыл бұрын

@@randallflagg9498 Not if it's send from within the EU

I lived in LA for about 4 years and one day I had to take the 405 through the canyon and the traffic was so bad it literally took 4 hours and when I got to where I was going I had a little celebration because I finally fully understood that little pop culture reference.

@marcbeebee6969

3 жыл бұрын

The last time there was a 4 hour traffic jam in germany emergency services where walking threw the jam giving out sandwiches, water and blankets in Winter. How do you handles that traffic day in and out. I would jump off the bridge after week two. Your a stronger man than I. Blaze on brother

Danny is such a champ for embracing the basement inside joke (allegedly)

That adhd moment was amazing. I love random ramblings about the 405 in LA and the M6 or maybe the m4 in wherever the hell Simon was talking about.

Only channel I immediately watch when I see it hits.

@heathermedling1313

3 жыл бұрын

I agree! That is just what OGBB Legends do while making a website on Squarespace about cocaine while using a VPN..... allegedly

Damn did sam switch his coffee brands or something he has been on a roll this week

@JasonW.

3 жыл бұрын

He is on a stringent diet of Magic Spoon and coke. Allegedly Magic Spoon.

This is why Danny writes long intros - look at what happens to Simon without one

The absolute horror when you realise that Yoko Ono’s book is real. 😱

I am glad that Danny and Sam will stay bodiless. Just saw the voice of one of my favorite Syfy channels and I was like WHY DID I LOOK?!?!!!??!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! It’s like meeting your hero’s. It’s just not a good idea. They will disappoint. Allegedly.

Technology Connections does have an excellent video on the divx. My boy is getting name dropped by Thee Simon Whistler

@RevJR

3 жыл бұрын

Simon could Blaze even more efficiently if he'd just trade ETA for a heat pump. I wonder what Technology Connections thinks of ETA...

@johnnylav

3 жыл бұрын

Technology Connections is the shit I just watch immediately every time there is a new video.

@PaulMcElligott

3 жыл бұрын

Did he do one on Divx? He has one on Flexplay, which was the self-destructing DVD product that totally failed to learn any lessons from Divx.

@bsadewitz

3 жыл бұрын

What sort of bizarre nexus is this? Indeed, I am an avid viewer of Technology Connections, and heat pumps have figured prominently into my mental churn lately. That's astute of you to draw a connection between ETA and heat pumps. I miss ETA. His presence really put a spring in my step. "5G causes COVID"😂

@bsadewitz

3 жыл бұрын

Are we actually part of KZread now? I think the borg has assimilated us.

*Intro is Simon doing a wail of sorts* "I bet he just mentioned Yoko in passing, let's find out!" *Blazes*

Route 66 still exists, it's actually considered a bit of a vacation in and of itself to drive the route to see all the crazy Americana tourist shit that's built along it.

OMG that "WHY?!" into Yoko transition was *chef kiss*, Sam!

Sam is getting ballsy.....might want to shorten his chain to the radiator Simon!

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

It's a good thing that Danny and ETA bonded and created a "popular kids" group in the basement, which doesn't include Sam, so if he ever escapes he's not taking them with him.

@joeyr7294

3 жыл бұрын

@@LizRealGirlBeauty lol I can see danny and eta running their asses off going 🖕

I always love hearing Simon say "no one cares" is usually regarding something that's world wide popular lol😂

You know, I’m getting the impression that Simon doesn’t really like Yoko Ono.

I worked for Barnes & Noble for ten years, and during that time they went from a staff who could tell you the title of what you were looking for based on a description of what the cover looked like, to a mostly-part time staff who usually pointed you to the self-serve kiosks to find your own damned book. All of this was to compete with Amazon. So rather than doubling down on the nice, friendly, knowledgeable staff and pleasant atmosphere, they phased out as many full time people they could to save a few bucks. Being good to your employees just isn't a priority for most companies.

Simon prolonged scream for intro.. Me remembering in past episodes his voice was needing healing: This 100% allegedly confirms he has mass production of clones, this is but one of many BB Simons

@Burritoswithfritos

3 жыл бұрын

The original simon died long ago. Hes in the basement with Danny

@nothanks7057

3 жыл бұрын

I was going to say something about his screaming but we need the chaos to make these perfect

@iginheo

3 жыл бұрын

Did you hear him sutter at the end when he was doing the credit read? He said he wrote it, and then corrected himself to say Danny wrote it. Maybe Danny is just a clone of Simon and that's why he's locked in the basement

@_tertle3892

3 жыл бұрын

Absolute legend

@chadcuckproducer1037

3 жыл бұрын

BB simon is like the copy of a copy in multiplicity.

I feel like we're privy to a special corner of madness in Simon's mind

As an old guy with ADHD and being a psychologist as well, I agree the ADHD loading bar broke me up as well. :)

The amount of blaze in this episode is epic.

That ADD is in high supply today! Simon should to a biographics for Yoko Onno.

@bamacopeland4372

3 жыл бұрын

No. It needs to be a business Blaze biographics of Yoko Ono. Just so we can rip into her. ALLEGEDLY

Ya'll could talk about the history of phone book fraud, and I'm going to click and watch my internet masters

That moment when Simon tells you to subscribe to a channel but you're such a legend that you've already subscribed to said channel before Business Blaze existed 😏

When I was a kid there was a bookstore called Waterstone and it was magical. They had comfy armchairs all over the place and it was as bright as day in the store, even at night.

@LSSYLondon

3 жыл бұрын

That's what I remember!

@potterendergaming5335

3 жыл бұрын

Waterstones still exist

@cartoonkelly7924

3 жыл бұрын

The one in the Burlington Mall in Massachusetts disappeared over 20 years ago. I have some Googling to do.

@pj9615

3 жыл бұрын

There's two Waterstones in Glasgow City Centre

@cartoonkelly7924

3 жыл бұрын

Looks like I’m going to Scotland… eventually…

I don't even think Sam or Danny exist...I think this is more of a Me, myself and Simon type situation

@SymbioteMullet

3 жыл бұрын

And ETA.

@Sledgeace

3 жыл бұрын

Greta thunberg meme, you forgot ETA

@holywood25

3 жыл бұрын

I was thinking more like split .si would make a great Patricia

@loke6664

3 жыл бұрын

Impossible, Simon is already close to time travel as the only explanation to how he can release that many vids each day on so many channels. Adding writing the stuff to that is just insane. Most other people release maybe 2-3 vids a week, Simon does that just here and he have like 12 other channels or so and most of his stuff is pretty long too. Nah, he probably have a whole bunch of people locked up in that basement of his.

@paulherman5822

3 жыл бұрын

They've been "liquidated" for a while now. The whole thing is now run by the army of Simon Whistler replicants... Allegedly.

I'm waiting for the day we (the audience) find out Simon has voices in his head.... Simon is Danny and the other randoms he "talks" to.

Following Simon when he goes off-script is like chasing a ping pong ball down a cobblestone road. Somebody get him a teleprompter, take his script away, and let Danny out of the basement.

I want a shirt that says "Blaze it Fact boy!"

Sorry to be THAT guy, but Route 66 does, in fact, still exist. And apparently you can still get your kicks on it. Our US National Parks Service even has a travel guide for it: www.nps.gov/subjects/travelroute66/index.htm

@Remianen

3 жыл бұрын

I was going to post this but figured someone else had already done it (and I was right). Not sure where he got the idea that it didn't exist anymore.

@FiveOnAFriday

3 жыл бұрын

Yes, when I heard that, I was like, Route 66 doesn't exist? Tell that to my morning commute.

@Carewolf

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah, and it is surprisingly off the beaten track. Drove on it for hours between seeing other cars.

"ADHD loading ..." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 ... You've outdone yourself this time, Sam!!!

7:40 "please dont hurt me" danny in the basement is a cover story, simon is the one actually in danny's basement [who's in the basement conspiracy confirmed!]

Always love when Business Blaze isn’t “allegedly” about business.

WHAT THE HELL IS EVEN THIS!?!? Sam, you MURDERED Simon on this one. ADHD loading... 🤣🤣

1 million subscriber special. Sam and Danny each host a business blaze episode. After Simon releases them from the basement.

The ADHD bars were absolute GOLD🤣🤣🤣 I laughed so hard during this video! Brilliant job gentleman! Allegedly!

Sam on point again as well as Danny and Simon. So good! I don't know why I love this channel as much as I do, but I do.

@andiward7068

3 жыл бұрын

It's bizarrely satisfying. My fave channel in all of YT.

A new way of processing the ADHD. I love it

22:10 "Twitter, the asshole of the internet; allegedly." So true, you legend.

The mattel Simon game was fun--it was an electronic memory/pattern game, popular in maybe the early 80s in the US. It'd actually be a cute addition to your shelf! :)

I often find myself wondering if I watch these videos for Simon's ADHD or Sam's memes about Simon's ADHD....

Nonamericans: "I love KFC" Me: "And yet you've never eaten a biscuit"

Technology Connections is GREAT! Glad to see I'm not the only one who loves his channel. :D

What if Danny and Sam aren't real, but figments of Simon's imagination in order to deal with and cope with the amount of youtube channels he runs?

There's just something about business blaze which is just so enjoyable.

@AdjutorMusic

3 жыл бұрын

Couldn't agree more

@doxx2265

3 жыл бұрын

It’s the cocaine.

@Naptosis

3 жыл бұрын

@@doxx2265 it's so moreish.

@RdsGarageOfficialYT

3 жыл бұрын

It's simon being simon that's so entertaining 😂😂

@chadcuckproducer1037

3 жыл бұрын

Its moderately redeeming that it's funny when he bashes the former US president while praising the current former vice president potato who can't even fall down right.

that ADHD loading bar left me in a ridiculously heightened state of excited anticipation..

I worked for Waldenbooks for the last several years of Borders' life. We (the low-level employees) understood the threat of Amazon and couldn't figure out why corporate was making so many stupid decisions. Best job I ever had though.

The ADHD loading bar cracked me up. 😂 I love the tangents Simon goes on. Keep up the fantastic work!! 😎👍

As somebody who has diagnosed ADHD I can’t tell you how relatable that is! Sam 10 out of 10!!

I'm smashing the like button for Sam's vintage memes!

Dear Simon, I visited the webpage you were promoting on your brand new fragrance for men, ecstatic with joy that the cologne that I've been anxiously waiting for had finally been released, and to my chagrin and utter disappointment, my hopes were crushed like so many rotting turtle carcasses washed ashore by a relentless tide that dashed their delicate turtly frames against the stones of the pier. The site has not yet been put up. In the words of Your Boy With the Blaze: GET ON IT, MAN!!! I know I'm not the only one waiting to purchase it. I expect the fragrance to come in a suitable container, much like the line of cologne by Zippo. My pitch: The cologne shall come in an actual turtle shell (preferably a critically endangered turtle species), and the nozzle would be the head of said dead turtle itself, mouth ajar. One would press down on its little head, and out of its gaping turtle maw would spray out a fine mist of that elusive Rotting Turtle aroma, a pungent aroma that I would wear with pride on my evening outings. Ehh? Ehhhhh? A million dollar proposition if ever there was one. Take it and run with it. A gift, form a true fan.

SAM. You made me spit my coffee out with that Walter White clip. Legendary.

Lakeside had a Borders, it closed in 2008. It now has a Waterstones.

I got caught watching KZread at work because I laughed myself into a fit at cheesus Christ

Barnes and Noble survived with better strategies. They did their due diligence in making sure the locations they chose could support a large book store, incorporated coffee shops and encouraged hanging out there, stocked various types of toys, puzzles, games, and collectibles, and maintained a more ordered and easily navigable layout of their stores. I'm sure there were some tough times where they barely made it, but they squeaked by and are a pretty stable company today (at least pre-pandemic)

It's official...found my new ringtone in the first five seconds of this video. Thank you!

Simon reads it, Danny writes it. Sam adds those fresh memes. And Zach Raids your Shadow like a Legend. Allegedly.

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

And ETA keeps the basement warm while whispering conspiracy theories to Danny so he'll write those scripts.

@jonathanpryzby4029

3 жыл бұрын

So the shadow walking by Simon's window was you the whole time!?!? !

Simon, are you sure that ‘giant book store’ where they let you browse and read to your heart’s content and supplied chairs wasn’t actually a library?

6:30 - Chapter 1 - Borders felled to the power of the internet 15:05 - Mid roll ads 17:30 - Chapter 2 - Yik yak 23:25 - Chapter 3 - Circuit city

I do not know why I expected a quiet start to this video. Sneaking it into my work time and makes everyone in the office jump and look around for the madman. I can't stop laughing, worth a trip into the bosses office. 🤣🤣🤣

Simon needs the CBD version of his "beard blaze" oil 👍🤓

Sam reacts to Simon reacts to Danny Plot twist Each reaction is via a different medium

I absolutely have to buy rotten turtle for someone. I have to witness the WTF face I will undoubtedly receive🤣

Her 'Taking A Shit On A Book On Screen And Then Burning That Shit-On Book' is one of Yoko Ono's most important Fluxus works.

So much Blaze'n going on these days! Love it!🔥🔥🔥🔥

When that day comes when Business Blaze has more subscribers than Business Insider, Legends across the globe will throw a massive party! Also can someone please buy a Kinder Surprise, film themselves smashing that shit to bits, then pull the toy out, show it to the camera and forward it to Sam so he can memefy the footage for the people across the pond?

@offrails

3 жыл бұрын

I live in the US. I'll get a Kinder Joy. It's same thing right?

@LizRealGirlBeauty

3 жыл бұрын

I'll get my Italian relatives to smuggle some of those juicy illicit eggs to me, then I'll get it done.

@Dan19870

3 жыл бұрын

@@offrails Noooooooooope. After Googling WTF is a Kinder Joy I now understand facts boi's pain.

Interviewer: Simon, can you sum up Business Blaze in just 4 words? Simon: 32:55