Oh yeah, I didn't finish my thought about not being open about this in my psychology sessions! Instead of saying I was worried about putting on too much weight, I told her I'd stopped snacking because those snack foods were unhealthy - which is true, but skirts around the weight issue, probably because I still tend to think of my reasons as being rather superficial, and therefore I shouldn't admit to the thought. It's silly, especially since I have good reasons to want to fit into my wardrobe including ones that are relevant to mental health, but I guess growing up back when anorexia was constantly talked about and being constantly questioned myself, I think that's a sensitivity I have that I've been in denial of. As for me now losing weight, I think I'm still being a bit dishonest, because part of me is actually going "oh yay, losing weight, everything's going to fit better now!" plus maybe a weird sense of pride(?) about being naturally small and people being jealous of it, even though I know it's not actually healthy for me to drop any lower than this. Perhaps because of society's mixed messages when I was growing up, I'm now split between liking being skinny, but thinking I'm not allowed to have that attitude, because society glorified the state of being "slim" while simultaneously demonising thin models for being unrealistic and encouraging unhealthy eating habits in young women. I am genuinely concerned for my health right now, but I'm also not entirely displeased that it happened, if that makese sense... The other thing is, if I'm losing too much weight from being sad, it gives me physical evidence to show the impact grief is having on me... which I can potentially use against my parents whenever they try to dismiss my emotional concerns 😐 that's a thought process as well for sure. --- Btw, hows the sound on this video? Was playing around in OBS, trying a few things, hoping I can get it to a point where I can trust these new settings live and maybe finally smooth out the audio levels for my videos going forward... but idk, I think because I've got the stereo mic device, it's getting weird artifacts that are kinda annoying... Also, after filming this, I did eat a few grapes but skipped lunch overall, and then wasn't particularly productive afterward. I did another lipstick test which I posted on my Instagram stories, and got my singing practise done (while doing Sudoku's), but it wasn't the artsy musical creative genius work I was hoping I'd do lol.

You asked about audio impressions in the unboxing video, I came back here and this studio audio on Weight video seems a little sharper, possibly stronger .. however I like the audio of the unboxing video as well. The Mecca video audio is very comfortable, the difference is so subtle .. ok, I might possibly prefer the Mecca .. but this one is perfect too. Don't change either one. I hope this helps.

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

Thanks, that's really interesting feedback, gives me a better idea of how to approach it ^_^

I was underweight for years from a health condition. I'm glad to be a normal weight again, and staying hydrated.

I have been underweight and now I’m overweight. Covid, or tuning 35 is when I started putting on the kgs. And indeed, beyond health concerns either way, most annoying thing for me is the wardrobe changes, and I mostly just wear plain ol’ black pants, no fancy wardrobe for me. I’m more worried about strength and ability/energy vs looks. But a bigger belly is also annoying to carry around. Yeah I noticed the humidity in Sydney - but I think its just the apartment I’m staying in appears to be especially humid.

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

Yeah I could definitely use more energy! 😅 The humidity has been nuts pretty much everywhere lately, and a couple days were really bad, I think you just missed the day we hit a record high dew point x_x that was about a week ago, hoo boy

Sometimes I have breakfast for my evening meal, it's a comforting change, like cheesy scrambled eggs, toast, juice, around 7pm or even later.

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

Scrambled eggs aren't really breakfast though, at least not here, you can totally have them for dinner with a steak or whatever.

I've never tried Vegemite but I've heard the name, interesting, I checked my grocer and a small jar is about $20 USD .. it's on my shopping list, but wow it's pricey here

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

If you do try some, don't use too much! Just start with a small scrape, see how you like it, build from there. Apparently some non-Aussies assume it's like jam and put a huge chunk on their toast and wonder why it's awful 😅 a little bit goes a long way! But yeah US$20 is a LOT for Vegemite, holy wtf. Also, but a bit of butter or margarine on the toast first. Lol maybe I should do a tutorial one day XD

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

Tutorial: kzread.info/dash/bejne/oZuJmJWqabinmqw.html haha

Do a mukbang stream Monday and I'll join the cult

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 🤔

the sound sometimes does the evil bad kind of asmr that doesn't feel very good. sounded fine mostly.

@DestroyerMariko

6 ай бұрын

I suppose "fine mostly" with moments of terror is pretty on brand for me 😅