“Sometimes people stop being friends with me and I don’t know why” just slapped me in the face. I’ve said this and experienced it so many times.

@JoannaSternbergYoutube

2 жыл бұрын

ME TOOOOOOOOO

@voiceofreason2691

2 жыл бұрын

Sorry to hear that♥️

@RAGEInsightYT

Жыл бұрын

Same here

@leah8900

Жыл бұрын

Same. :/

@avivastudios2311

Жыл бұрын

It could be that you weren't really friends in the first place. Friendship is something more stronger than most people think.

I solve this ”problem” with magically finding other people on the spectrum, and befriend them. All of my close friends have gotten diagnosed while I’ve been knowing them. It’s like we just found each other and somehow knew before anyone of us actually realized it.

I wish I had a friend like you, I struggle to tell if I'm friends with anyone. Neurotypical people are really hard to understand, it hurts my head.

@ClassPresidentAlejandro1999

3 жыл бұрын

I know what you said

@davef2975

3 жыл бұрын

It is all about respect. "Friendship" should not be a label or declaration. When two people respect each other, everything else will follow in time. Importantly, the level of respect will dictate the depth of the "friendship." There are many I respect and like but I do not call "friend." Yet it does not hinder being around them and enjoying their company.

@ClassPresidentAlejandro1999

3 жыл бұрын

@@davef2975 Exactly

@ToatsMcGoatsO0

3 жыл бұрын

Holy shit, I thought this was just me, I've no idea who I nod at or say hello to or stop and talk to or any of that shit. I used to play d&d with a group of guys pre covid for a year or 2, but no idea if we're friends or if they like me. I had to get my girlfriend to help me write a message on the group chat thing cause I just let people fall by the way side, cause its just too hard and frustrating to know what's going on. I want to have friends but it's very exhausting.

@Evanx373

Жыл бұрын

I’m going through this now with a friend of mine our friendship is crumbling cause I don’t understand her at all. She wants a close emotional connection and is so tiring for me. She gets irritated regularly because I don’t show much emotion or understand them.

I dislike it when, a person talks to me asking questions, sounding out like some job interview, and I don't even know there name. I end up just wanting to go.

Omg I totally relate to you. I can't tell if people like me or are just tolerating me. I also lose friends for no apparent reason.. I'm in my mid twenties and still don't know how to make and maintain friendships outside of university. I'm scared because I am graduating and don't want to lose the few friends I have right now :(

@raphaelsanluis9711

10 ай бұрын

So true .

Never could figure out how I'm supposed to be friends with someone I don't have a common interest with (or how to maintain a friendship if the common interest stops being a common interest). It just doesn't make sense to me. Also, basically, this entire video felt like a personal call-out of the intense variety. It's almost unsettling 😬

I was recently diagnosed and realized that my only “friendship” falls into the exploitation category. So much for that... Now that I better understand myself though, I’m hopeful that I’ll be better able to recognize friendships that work for me and people who listen when I express my needs. (:

@RomeoChessGameVlogs200

Жыл бұрын

Yeah I am able to recognize friendships that work for me but sometimes I’m able to recognize people when they are difficult So my friendships fall into the exploitation category as well and I recognize that one friendships work and I understand the good people were good friends that actually listen when I expressed my needs

@martinkaczynski8526

11 ай бұрын

Stay away from making friends as you and I are at risk of being exploited and abused and taken advantage of. - Always remember, Friendship is a crime scam.

@martinkaczynski8526

11 ай бұрын

Stay away from making friends as you and I are at risk of being exploited and abused and taken advantage of. - Always remember, FRIENDSHIP ISA CRIME SCAM.

@martinkaczynski8526

11 ай бұрын

Stay away from making friends as you and I are at risk of being exploited and abused and taken advantage of. - Always remember, FRIENDSHIP IS A CRIME SCAM.

We might have more friends than NTs do but who do *we* see as _friends_ ? Because I don't see everyone I talked to more than once as friends, more like _people I'm familiar with_ which somehow is different to what NTs deem as "friend-worthy".

@shadowfox933

2 жыл бұрын

That probably stems from the fact that NTs are able to be familiar with a lot more people. At least in my case, I've hit my limit (in a manner of speaking) around the time I've interacted with about 20 people that I don't already know pretty well (and that includes phone calls while I'm at work). I imagine NTs do more on a daily basis, I just don't have the energy to do much more, so if I'm familiar with someone, it's because I've used up my internal resources on them a lot already

I can count on more than one hand ppl who have stopped being my friend or stopped talking to me with no warning :/

I lost many friends because of my Autism. Because they denied it, did not accept it, or did not understand me. It has hurt me a lot.

i relate so heavily to school friends not inviting my places throughout my childhood. overtime i instead learned to develop good online friendships which helped. for the longest time i blamed my lack of in-person interactions on being busy with dance classes, but even when i quit dance my friends didn't interact any more than before. as someone questioning if i'm autistic, thank you for bringing this up cause i didn't know other people went through the same thing

This makes so much sense. I don't understand friendships/relationships. I want connection. I just don't understand it. Most often people like me but soon get tired of me or think I am too muck work. They also misinterpret my moods and the things I say. I had a best friend for 22 years and one day she texted me and said she can't talk to me anymore because I am too negative. She felt that I was complaining too much when in reality I was just telling her what was happening in my life. My grandmom had a stroke and developed dementia and things were really hectic. She took it as complaining but I wasn't complaining. I guess I was just answering her questions too literally. She also grew tired of my social awkwardness around her other friends. Currently there is someone I want to get to know but I am very nervous that I will scare them away so I am waiting to see if they come to me.

@lunamoondrop

2 ай бұрын

dude, just be you- if they run away...let 'em. you deserve to be your full expression. no sense in holding yourself back, dude- no sense at all. you'll just feel like you're choking to death.

@lunamoondrop

2 ай бұрын

dude, just be you- if they run away...let 'em. you deserve to be your full expression. no sense in holding yourself back, dude- no sense at all. you'll just feel like you're choking to death.

Hmm I think where the differing definitions of friendship become a problem though is when people who autistic people consider friends don’t reciprocate those feelings, which can lead to a lot of hurt for the autistic person and awkwardness for the non-autistic person. I had a really rough time in middle and high school when I had some hard situations let me know most people who I considered my friends were not actually my friends (ie being left out, talked about behind back, straight up made fun of). They’re not true friends if the other party doesn’t also consider you a friend. I am a very loyal friend but can’t recognize passive aggressiveness- i feel terrible when I offend people but if you don’t tell me I won’t know. I agree that boundaries/definitions of friendship need to be set explicitly. I like to tell people to assume that I won’t do anything hurtful intentionally, so if I do something offputting try not to be offended and just talk to me about it.

I feel like friendship or relationships are not that important to NTs as autistic people. Autistic people are very heartwarming and emotional. Most people are just a come and go type of person.

Thank you for this video. As an NT, I sometimes get frustrated that my autistic child's friendships don't seem to offer the level of emotional support and connection I expect and need in friendship. This was helpful to me.

Here's a separate comment. The whole friendship thing, it's like someone is telling MY experiences. Examples being, I've had people not wanting anything to do with me, and I've even had people stop being friends with me and I did not know why. Another thing is that I can relate to being more into a friendship as you described than the other person. But I think it's because we love a lot. Besides being autistic, I am also childlike.

I've been taken advantage of by "friends" so often it's exhausting. Romantic relationships too. I have one good friend now but that's about it lol. I'm scared to make anymore due to past experiences

Studies like that first one are...hilarious. It's almost as though they're surprised when a group of people, who are defined by the fact that their brains operate differently from the typical particularly in social contexts, define social success differently from typical people and don't conform to the scales set up to measure typical social success. Sometimes, I wonder how these people get funding for their research :D

@shadowfox933

2 жыл бұрын

@Philip Noah see, and this is why I got out of the purely academic fields in college. Too much bullshit for my time, and I'd rather actually do something with the knowledge I have

I'm an NT and this is my definition of friendship. Two or more people who love, trust and respect one another.

I identify with what you've said SO MUCH! It seems that my idea of a friend is very different from what others consider a friend. Additionally, It seems silly to say, but I just don't know how to manage appropriate communication for friendships. It's hard to start new ones, and I don't want to be annoying so I end up ghosting people and thus have very little in the way of close friendships.

@avivastudios2311

Жыл бұрын

Dont feel bad for annoying people. I would personally love to be annoyed. As an NT I like it when my business is disturbed cause I hate routine.

I am autistic and have a best friend because we hang out all the time and even when I am in overloads I always talk to her By the way love your chanle

I solved the problem, I had imaginary friends. I had to remember not to talk out loud to them, though. I stopped having these friends a few years ago. It’s been pretty lonely since then. I don’t know if they abandoned me or I abandoned them. Unfortunately, my problems are exacerbated by a hearing loss I’ve had since birth. I used to think my hearing loss was the sole cause of my awkwardness. To find out I am weird for other reasons is devastating, not really freeing. I can’t stop crying. I am terrified of being strange. My father was socially awkward and I was so afraid of being like that.

Thoughts: the conflict in my ASD symptoms: -How things need to meet expectations or it can cause a meltdown or shutdown v fidgeting (stimming) and poor time keeping (time blindness) leading to lateness and chaotic sleep patterns also leading to lateness and inconsistent (not meeting established expectations) ability to function. -Not liking small talk or beating around the bush v my anxiety and depression needing care and tact. -Focus into something and check out of everything else (task switching) v hating being ignored --Intense special interest in friends (perserveration) v needing recharge space -Intense focus on aspects v needing UNCONDITIONAL positive regard ... I find these things very frustrating

So much familiar in this...

I don’t need friends, but I would like some. But then when I do have friends, they always do something that annoys me and I end up ghosting them😩

I only have like three friends (one of them being my boyfriend), but I have a lot of acquaintances. Growing up I had a few friends, but most of them had their own groups of friends that they hung out with, so I just wandered between. I may have had 1 or 2 that I "clung" to. My mom said I never had friends, more acquaintances, And she really screwed me over with that since I don't know if I ever actually make friends or if I just call them that

@MissShembre

3 жыл бұрын

My mom was kind of similar because she came from a generation where there were no cell phones.

Interesting! I've always thought it was strange how much I obsessed over friendships growing up, to the point of driving people away. I usually would have a bunch of people I'd talk to in different social groups but I didn't consider them "friends" more like friendly acquaintances because we never really hung out outside of school. I would have one friend that I'd consider my best friend and we would hang out outside of school who I constantly was trying to impress. Most of the time those best friends would start pulling away and once friendships become too one sided I usually cut them out of my life completely. Now that I'm 30 and getting my diagnosis I've been a lot kinder to myself regarding friendships and am more confident about just being myself. My best friend works with adults with disabilities and she is super patient and understanding :)

One of the classic lines from church folks (especially pastors), is 'As an adult, you should know...' Sometimes what they expect me to automatically 'know' is not even true. At such times I have felt like saying, 'As a church pastor, you should know...' But that would get me in the doghouse

I think something is starting to click for me. I always thought that me and friendships are not compatible. I could make friends if i tried but could never keep them. It just always seemed so demanding to keep in contact with people and if they didn't push me away I'd push them away. I'm starting to see that friendships don't have to follow these rules I had in my head and I could include my needs in how a friendship might work for me. I don't like keeping in touch with people between meeting them, but when i meet with you it's the best time. I think i need to create my own friendship guidelines for myself and communicate them. It's also helpful to look at friendships with the lense of shared interests, not emotional support. This has been really helpful.

I struggle with people just being fake to me bc I’m autistic

People like me becauise of I don't have a ego. And I love to listen.

My son is autistic, he found this video and shared it with his friend at school and asked me to watch it. It is very helpful!

Prediagnosis: I thought I was friends with people. Post diagnosis: People think they are friends with me.

when i got assesssed they said i didn't have as complex an understanding of relationships as other people my age....... it really hurt my feelings & i'm still insecure about it, but i'm seeing now it's just a difference in how i understand relationships

Biggest obstacle in my friendships with people with autism is the almost psychopathic lack of empathy. Seriously when in conversation set a 5 minute vibrate alarm to remember to ask something to try understand where the other is coming from. i say this kindly, the way you present this is how the friend is a shoe that should adjust to your foot, instead of including the notion that the autistic person should try to adjust to the other. Many wellmeaning people bend over backwards to adjust to autism and sometimes that gets taken for granted a bit too much.

@mmhmmmificate

Жыл бұрын

I'd unfriend you too lol.

@nikkiwi3946

10 ай бұрын

I honestly get where you’re coming from. I’m on this video trying to understand my autistic friend, but the way they act is quite exhausting for me. I truly care for them and want them to be happy, yet they add on a lot of stress for me. They have tendencies to cause trouble in school like stealing people’s stuff and standing on chairs which was okay to deal with at first, but then they wouldn’t take accountability for their actions and I would be the one trying to help the person whose stuff was stolen find their things where and whenever my autistic friend had hidden it. Just in general, I would feel really tired from their behavior. I am trying to understand and be the best friend I can for them, but this is just the tip of the iceberg of some of the things they have done. I really want them as a friend, but I’m only one person who already has a lot on their plate.

@Godwh1sperer

10 ай бұрын

@@nikkiwi3946 when one is different (God literally talks with me since i was a little kid) one has the duty to try meet the other in the middle. Both sides must try to adjust to one another. Too many have the attitude of "i'm different, cater to me or take a hike." No, we should not do that. I'm on the spectrum too but you just dont use that as a battering ram to get what you want, that's entitled as f towards people who try really hard to getr along nicely.

I came on this video because I was told by closest friends in the past 5 years that I'm often intense about the constant communication and sharing, but it made them feel pressured about it and needs space. It kinda hurts to know the other person is not contributing to the friendship the way I usually do, but as you said it doesn't mean my friends don't love or care about me. I just tend to wanna tell someone details of my day and also know about theirs, but gotta chill out a bit I suppose! And yeah it's also really unclear to me what "needing some space" mean, I wanted clear instructions and steps to follow but as my friend pointed out to me: there's no formulas in relationships, you have to be flexible and adjust as you go or from moment to moment.

I am sharing this video to 'Autism Unmasked' FB community. It's new but growing quickly. It's a low restriction community where you can be yourself, meet other ASD individuals as well as non ASD individuals with other mental health conditions. It's not all about Autism, just founded by autistics. Post about any mental health topic, a random unrelated funny meme, a selfie, a picture of your pets, whatever you want. It's a group FOR autistics... not just about autism. Please come join us in this rare pocket of social media free from the echo chamber effect. come make some friends. Autism Unmasked on FB

As an autistic person, I've had many fake friends

Keep up with the good content love how you getting the word about Autism out there

Initially all my peer relationships were within structured settings such as school. Even my neighbourhood "friendships" were sort of arranged because for the most part it was something I was pushed into by my parents and I didn't really get along with the others. It's only recently that I have made some friends and that too online thanks to social media groups (mostly political because surprise surprise I feel very strongly about right and wrong). Then again I have a constant feeling that my connections to those people are weaker compared to what I observe between them.

I get the Super Weird & Creepy to the point it makes me uncomfortable too. I’ve asked New Friends to let me know if I’m crossing any of your boundaries? I’ll be Happy to work on improving. I’m Grateful that one of my hobbies is also my Job!🤗

HI Steph!🙂🙂🙂 THIS IS MY LIFE 😕

I just found your channel, I was only recently diagnosed as an adult, but I can’t explain how mind-blowingly reassuring it is to listen to someone’s experience that’s finally relatable on a level more than skin deep….

This video was really good. The lopsided friendship thing, wow, so relevant. Thank you for this.

Found this video very helpful, I have a new friend at work, and recently, he told me that he is on the spectrum. This video will help me be a better friend to him.

Yes so true . Preach it girl🙌

I so relate and I love your transparency

This video needs way more likes and views. Very, very well done.

Wow...... This was helpful and sad all at the same time.....

Thank you so much for this video. You have a way of articulating what I'm thinking, but don't know how to communicate to the people around me. I especially resonated with the "need for status updates." When a friend becomes weirdly distant and/or avoidant, I never know why. I need to be told when someone feels uncomfortable with me because then I'll know I haven't "educated" that friend about myself enough. I love who I am, and I have a drive for most of my friendships to be close ones. My desire for close friendships can feel like a superpower on some days and like a paralyzing Kryptonite on other days. Again, everything in this video is so helpful with enabling me to verbalize my experience. Thanks again!

Great video! I'm Autistic and most of this resonates with me, it's why I really don't have friends now :/ I want friends, but it can get so exhausting trying to decode things and getting stuck in loops

Omg me toooooo! I've been friends with people as long as 18 and 30 years and they have dropped off I guess they call it ghosting now and I have no idea why I'm for money or love I could not get them back Don't know why I just know as to be mean because I have regularly in fact in my life everyone will go away without explanation at some point That's just a gimmick I'm 55 this year and that's just the way it is for me. 😔

Your content has been very helpful on my journey to being diagnosed with Autism. I am 17 and I finally received my diagnosis of Autism about a week ago, with an added bonus of ADHD, which I certainly was not expecting since I had also researched ADHD (but not quite as extensively). I have one really good friend, my best friend, actually. Most people may look in on my life and think that I have more friends than I do. My dad commented on my initial Neuropsych eval that he thought I had a bunch of friends and my mom also thought I was great at making friends. This has mostly been not the case. While I can be *friendly* to people that definitely does not mean I consider them friends. It makes me uncomfortable calling anyone other than my best friend and another person who I am pretty good friends with a friend. If I've met someone, or even talked to them multiple times, I do not consider them a friend. While sometimes I may feel lonely because I wish I had more people to talk to (sometimes my friends are busy) I don't feel the need to make more friends and actually find it quite hard to build long lasting relationships. I've been friends with my best friend since 6th grade and have known her since 3rd grade. Thinking about making friends becomes extremely overwhelming because it took me YEARS to become as comfortable as I am with my best friend. I don't really consider myself lonely and I'm satisfied with the amount of friends I have + family and pets. Anyways, thanks so much for your helpful videos and content- there was so many videos from you and other autistic content creators for me to research autism. I don't really like reading and can't process it well, so it was helpful to hear the information.

Omg so much makes more sense now with that research and the perseverance. I've been really struggling with feelings of guilt about not being able to be always 'on' with friends, like I was with still-ex who I always had energy for. Also, this video is very timely. My new friend group is very much 'we're all weirdos and we get each other' while also being mutually beneficial and emotionally connected because none of us have had that before, and having similar special interests. And also also, one of my new close friends said at a meetup today that she is autistic (diagnosed) and me and another gal hadn't been told yet. I had actually strongly suspected and just hadn't brought it up yet because I didn't want to presume, haha, so I already 'knew'. I haven't said anything about suspecting myself yet, though, because I'm realizing how proficient I actually am at masking, and that I'm doing it more than usual right now due to coming out of my relationship, and I don't want to come off as like 'Idk if you believe me but I think I might have this thing even though I've learned to hide/grown out of a fraction of it'.

I really liked how you explained the difference in how you perceive friendship then someone without autism. So helpful! I'll be sharing this with my kids!

this video just validated my entire life. THANK YOU times infinity!!!!

This is a wonderful video that opened my eyes. Thank you so much.

Honestly, I came here to learn more about autistic people and friendships and I got exactly what I was looking for. I am definitely that person that connects with people through common interests, emotional bonding, and socializing. But my autistic friend doesn’t seem particularly worried about those things, or often times feels left out (which is not intentional). I found myself getting frustrated because of course relationships go both ways, if I put in effort, so do you. But I’m not sure if that’s accurate or not for everyone. At times I’ve definitely felt used by my friend, and felt as though they do very little work to actually stay connected in any way, but also expects to be included, which can feel confusing on my end because normally that doesn’t seem right. I’m still learning about this, and of course learning how to communicate gently so he doesn’t feel attacked or too upset. I know ultimately he does care and we’ve had good moments together. But I definitely do not feel I am educated enough to fully understand and have that compassion as I’d like to. Especially now that I’m questioning the friendship and if he actually cares, which I’m sure he does. But this has helped clear up some things, and I’ll definitely be making more effort to communicate and see what goes from there.

I like to say I have no friends but many acquaintances. I try not to get too close to people, and I don't like letting people get too close to me.

Just here to say thank you so much for your videos, I'm realising again and again that what I've been through isn't the norm, and I'm starting my first appointment for an ASD assessment next week 😊

Dang, I related to this to such an extreme degree. I totally understand what you mean when it comes to friends just up and leaving without any explanation and thus I'm wondering what I did wrong. I've experienced that phenomenon so many flipping times. I was actually just in a situation like that too... I was acting the wrong way within a relationship and I guess he was getting really annoyed by it and so he started giving me the cold shoulder and I had no idea what was going on. Thankfully we were able to talk things out and start to mend the relationship, but most people never explain themselves and they refuse to say anything because, like you said, they expect that I should just know what I did.

This is probably the most relatable video ever. I spent much of the past 15 years (I'm 50) working on making friends, and I still don't even know if I'm too reserved or too clingy, so I don't know what is wrong or how to fix it. I've always been on the outskirts of a few odd groups, never for long, except college, which I think I never should have left. My older kids are the same. Like, we see people who during the summer their friends are calling and texting them and doing things together or they hang out after school or whatever, but that never happens to us, even if we try to initiate it. Seeing it happen to my kids is hard. My daughter independently decided she is probably on the spectrum, which might help her accept it, and my son is a future engineer, so he should be around others on the spectrum, which seems to help him. I hope. I go into groups with some common interests and volunteer and help people in hopes of meeting friends, but have had very little luck in 15 years and I'm unsure of the few I do know, because after decades of thinking people were friends and trying to be around them and get closer and get them to do things with me until I overhear them saying I'm boring or weird or whatever (have accidentally overheard "boring" like 4 times in 10 years, which is impressive given how seldom I was around people at all), I just need them to take all the steps and show interest or I will hold back so I'm not that annoying one. I wish people were like in video games with bars over their heads saying things like "overall friendship" and "current level of annoyance" and "reason for annoyance" or "Hey, you're doing something right!" light, because I can't tell. I'm good at telling people are annoyed, but never know WHAT is annoying them or WHAT they might like about me. Which is why they leave and I don't know, why I try to help, amuse, and comfort people and they don't seem to like it, but when I read books and articles on how to be a friend, I intentionally do all those things, and it doesn't work. If I'm not on the spectrum, I'm simply the worst person ever, because I try to be funny and helpful and listen and care, but mostly fail.

Thank you!

Valuable videos as always. I more understand that how we view friendship as autistic people are also tend to be different than neurotypical, it's not only about social skills. Thanks Stephanie :D

You share some incredibly educational videos, thank you for that. The knowledge I have gained from you is priceless.. thos video has helped me understand a part of myself that really has confused me.

I understand you so much. At 35 years young, I almost forgot that I looked up autism and then just forgot that it probably applied to me. Also purple is my favorite color, so love that for us.

I can really relate.

I have come to realise that i am like chocolate to people. I taste lovely at first, but after a while that spicy sickly taste kicks in (the gradual avoidance) and then finally the baarfing from chocolate poisoning kicks in (The leave me alone stage). Didnt anyone tell them that chocolate needs to be enjoyed responsibly?

I am 58 and just officially diagnosed with ADHD. I suspect maybe being on the spectrum, too. I relate so much to your video! I almost seem neurotypical, but then I have “odd” behaviors that show up. The more I tap into my real self and unmask, the more they are showing up. Like yesterday, my husband asked if I was eating a cupcake. I said, “No, just smelling it. You know, my sensory stuff.” In the past he has said, “Don’t put your nose in that!” I answer, “I didn’t touch it! I’m just smelling it!” I do this with touching things, too. I hadn’t thought of it as odd in the past, but I am just starting to realize some of my “things” are not neurotypical. Like, a student in a classroom I was an instructional assistant in sometimes hand flapped when he was excited, but he mostly looked neurotypical. I laughed one day and told the classroom teacher (who is a friend, also) that I got a sudden burst of excited energy when home alone and jogged across the room and did a couple of hand flaps. She gave me an “that’s interesting” look. Btw, not the first time I have done that.

I've alway been very quiet as a kid, didn't help that my mom felt the need to overprotect me wen I was growing up. Only got diagnosed at 19, I'm 20 (recently turned) now and realised I don't have many friends and those that I did have got bored and jsut up and left me. It kinda sucks I guess.

God this helps me so much. Even as a 55 yr old who is just learning about my asd1/adhd

Thank you for this video, for me, this saved my life.

thanks for sharing about friendship, as it was very helpful for a late self diagnosis autistic ADHD Adult. As I feel I currently own have two friends.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

That's what it is?? Thank you.

THANK YOU! Such validation! :)

I am so glad i found this video again, i need to re watch it considering i now have a friend and have come to understand my deficits much better due to your more recent videos 💙💜💛🖤 Oof. Strikes deep to hear it said again. “This is my life” eirghhhhh I’m very sticky. Perseveration ugh Watery eyes

Needed this. I can relate to all of it.

You actually make informative videos watchable for me! I try to learn more about auDHD but they're boring info bombs imo. I was never tempted to click off this vid and thats rare for me 😆 you just get it.

Very accurate & well explained. 👍💖

Sometimes the struggle is real to connect.

I remember in third grade I was best friends with a kid with autism and he was awesome we would always talk about games and play on the playground and I was devastated when he moved away I was literally crying when I learned I still hope I can contact him one day

Hi Stephanie! Very informative video I'm Neurodivergent (Dyspraxia) I have issues regarding socialising and friendships and relationships.

Thank you for the video it was very informative and helpful

Hi Stephanie, you and I are a lot alike; being a mom of four, I'm always preoccupied, and I'm isolated away from a lot of interaction with other people. I've become accustomed to being alone after others figure out how "weird" I really am! 😂 But, I'm the friend who picks up right where we left off. Once a genuine connection has been made, you're kind of stuck with me. 😎If I get distracted I pray others I've connected with do not take it personally. I'm such a stickler for routine, sometimes there's not enough time in the day for me. I can catch up with a friend for hours, then I might not see them for a while, then we will pick back up days or sometimes weeks at a time. 😊

I just realized I’ve basically been masking by implying things my entire life, no matter how much I wanted to say something directly I just implied it bc I was worrying abt what the other person would say

Relationships that involve mutual trust are friendships.

Very interesting video! Such a great topic and you covered it so well.

@ClassPresidentAlejandro1999

3 жыл бұрын

Yep very well covered and longer videos

Great job 👍

I RELATE SO HARD

Purple hair suits you :) ty for the content

❤❤❤

At this point I have 0 friends...always been exploited from toxic people

I have the same friend issues.

Ok so, I don’t have very many friends IRL, and those I do have moved away. Most of my friends are online, and I wish I could make friends IRL but there’s just not that many safe options for me. I mean…there’s church, but that’s just one place. Also I have told my mom and dad that I wanna find friends who share the same interests as me…and there just like “that’s not a requirement, it’s the morals and beliefs that you need to share” and I mean…sure that’s important too, but so are the interests. WHY IS THIS SO FREAKING HARD AND FRUSTRATING, I JUST WANT FRIENDS DANG IT 😣😞😢

I'll be honest, I didn't really start thinking about friendships and relationships explicitly till a few years back (when I was 26). And given that my exposure to neurodiversity was extremely limited at that time (I hadn't even considered that I could be autistic) all information I could find on these topics were from a neurotypical point of view. And using those definitions it was all too easy to conclude that I did not in fact have any friends. That I hadn't actually had any, ever. All I had experienced were peer relationships with other people based on shared interest. In college I had a group of metalheads and we would discuss music a lot but that was the extent of my interaction with them. In school I interacted with just a few different people based on our shared interests of metal, games and technology. One lived very close to my house (5 minutes walking I'd say) and still I could probably count on my fingertips the number of times we met outside of school.

@Xankill3r

3 жыл бұрын

I'm actually very happy to learn that it's not just me and that most (all?) autistics experience friendship like this! Still need to work on unlearning my old definition which definitely makes me feel more alone.

Yeah Autistic people are defining friendship then what normal people think of it as. we just value friendship in different ways that's why I have it so it's hard for me to being stronger in conversations

I wish I had friends.

Prediagnosis: Unable to understand why people dont want to be friends with me. Postdiagnosis: People unable to understand why I dont want to be friends with them.

The whole friendship thing, it's like someone is telling MY experiences. I am also childlike.