10 million died because they marched on an enemy knight. 10 million died because they didn't want to.

@bobsempletank5362

Жыл бұрын

damned if you do, damned if you don't

@quincykunz3481

Жыл бұрын

"20 million marching on the knight CLEARLY would have worked, which is why the order was given. If only more of the platoons were filled out by Kreigsman." -Commanding officer probably.

@cravinghibiscus7901

Жыл бұрын

There definitely is no better way to organise society than this. If you get them all moving in the same direction at once they cannot run away as long as the wave is long enough to bend over the planets curvature and hide the target of the assault! Hm? Tyrranids? Oh we are all dead already for no real reason past some truly pathetic family drama? Everyone likes to joke about how orks are the comic suspension of disbelief of the grimdark future. But honestly it is nothing compared to how impossible imperium society is.

@JudgeNaughtBand

Жыл бұрын

Commissar after murdering 10 million of his own men to a band of Chaos Knights that murdered the other 10 million: "Alright, we'll call it a draw"

@jacksonpettit4690

Жыл бұрын

Oh wait so we calculated the statistics but didn’t calculate mutiny?

"What did we learn, Palmer?" "We need more Guardsmen, Commander" "Correct."

@hibbidyjibbidyy

Жыл бұрын

if only they had zap barannigan

@ardentwolf_4288

7 ай бұрын

​@@hibbidyjibbidyy "YOU STINK!"

@Screwytea69

5 ай бұрын

And to FIX BAYONETS next time

@Nefylym

5 ай бұрын

... you know, for the kids!

@L0wki

4 ай бұрын

@@hibbidyjibbidyyWave after Wave of mý best Man :D

"... And who were we fighting?" -"We don't know sir." "Did we win?" "..... We also don't know that sir." ""But we did lose 20 million men." -"We definitely know that, sir."

@chriswhite3692

Жыл бұрын

Reminds me of an episode of Animaniacs where Yakko is a tinpot dictator about to send troops off into battle. "Many of you may not come back. Most of you definitely won't."

@xTheUnderscorex

Жыл бұрын

Then 2 years later 12 million of them drop out of a warp storm having miraculously been spirited away at the last moment, upon which they're immediately slaughtered and consumed by tyrannids giving them enough biomass to overwhelm a space marine chapter in a strategically important moment.

@xavierstegmeier8595

Жыл бұрын

To defeat your enemy you must know them, not simply their battle tactics but their history, philosophy, art -Grand Admiral Thrawn The fact that the guardsman don't even know what they are fighting most of the time is one of the many reasons that the imperium is doomed

@yomommashaus

Жыл бұрын

@@xTheUnderscorex lol a Tyrannid toilet

@DKNguyen3.1415

Жыл бұрын

@@xavierstegmeier8595 Heresy!

- But did we bring the enemy knights down? - 3 out of 12, sir. - That settles it then, tomorrow we'll try with 60 million soldiers.

@Nexis1701

Жыл бұрын

that does not add up for killing all 12 tho

@matiasyannuzzi9655

Жыл бұрын

@@Nexis1701 No, because 3 of the knights are already dead. They need to kill 9 more knights. If it took 20 million to kill 3 knights, then 60 should have no problem killing 9. Some of them might even survive, considering they only have to suffer the firepower of 9 knights instead of 12.

@augustday9483

Жыл бұрын

​@@matiasyannuzzi9655 That's exactly the kind of tactical genius we need in the Imperium! Somebody make this man an officer, pronto!

@carlpierce2486

Жыл бұрын

A units strength is proportional to the square of it numbers x the percentage that can actually attack. If that percentage is 100% then in this case. If 20 million kill 3/12 then the enemies strength is reduced in the ratio 81/144. So a unit around 25 million should be enough.

@sirpancherto

Жыл бұрын

​@@carlpierce2486unless there's a chokepoint

I love how there's a clear exact reason as to why all these troops died and they're still like "What did we do?"

@archibaldgaylord-focker8586

Жыл бұрын

Must not have sent enough gaurdsman. Double it up and send the next group in.

@Caliell

Жыл бұрын

Zapp Brannigan did.

@LesangdesdieuX

Жыл бұрын

@@archibaldgaylord-focker8586 That strategy never ever failed before right

@bellgrand

Жыл бұрын

​@@LesangdesdieuX Operation Tarpit was a genius strategy. They kept a Traitor Knight out of the fight for weeks.

@skebaba918

Жыл бұрын

@@Caliell Hey Zapp Brannigan's strategy only worked because the killbots had hardcaps on their killcounts, after which they automatically shut down for good.

-Estimated casualties a day? -20 million, sir -20 million? No biggie. Just keep an eye on the battle. Report back to me when... whenever it makes sense.

@nealbosher9293

Жыл бұрын

My last game of 40k was like this.

@tech20100

Жыл бұрын

@@nealbosher9293 i read trough comments and i faint of laugh :))) you guys crazy

@jarowan

Жыл бұрын

"Yes sir. Ahhh, there's still the matter of the Inquisitor." "What about him?" "Well, sir, ah, a Vindicare Assassin was surveilling the area, as you had ordered, and a rosette is hard to see at that range and, uh, he saw him hacking a Commissar to death with a Power Sword, and, uh, not having any clear instructions... uh, he shot him." "Is he dead?" "Ahhh, no." "DAMN IT" "Ah, well, he's in a coma... he, uh, may not make it, uh, they think he's not going to make it, uh, he's probably not going to make it." "Well, let me know if he wakes up."

@CJVS995

5 ай бұрын

Isn't that literally how the siege of Vraks went?

"how can we spin this as a win?" "They died gloriously defending the imperium against insurmountable odds"

@azuaraikrezeul1677

3 ай бұрын

sounds like ukraine

@akriegguardsman

3 ай бұрын

​​@@azuaraikrezeul1677 if it was Ukraine they would have said "actually it was just a village and we damaged enemy equipment fighting over something strategically insignificant"

Imagine being a Knight with a 5 million person killstreak.....

@pauledwards9493

Жыл бұрын

all in a days work

@dominiconeil4693

Жыл бұрын

Halo Narrator: ...You guys just can't make my life easy, can you?

@BeatmasterAC

Жыл бұрын

K/D off the charts ^^

@TheOuroboros84

Жыл бұрын

*lights a cigar watching the bloodstains dozens of meters down from the cockpit* damn.... I should have become a painter...

@11jerans

Жыл бұрын

Death’s Saber be like: “Those are rookie numbers.”

"What did we learn, Palmer?" "That Cadia stands, sir?" "Exactly, Cadia Stands!"

@victuz

5 ай бұрын

Golden comment.

@justy8x870

Ай бұрын

Cadia Stands!

@nukewaste

Ай бұрын

Cadia more, floats. Orbits, really- when you end up in that many pieces, you just end up an asteroid belt.

I like the attitude of ‘how can we learn from this’ here because we know that the commissar and imperium actually don’t care

@Trapsarentgay133

Жыл бұрын

the commissar cares but the administratum doesn't and he knows it

@nationalsocialism3504

Жыл бұрын

They care about achieving the objective... it is irrelevant in Industrial Warfare what the "cost" is as long as the enemy is paying a higher one than you. Millions of men are a drop in the ocean, lasguns are cheap, & Flak armor is plentiful...

@theduke7539

Жыл бұрын

Thats the thing though, Warhammer doesnt actually have as bad of a military as it seems. They adapt and learn all the time, but theyre fighting aliens and monsters the likes of which are not comprehendable. And all in all, their casualty numbers only look horrific until you account for scale. the Astromilitarum has something like 30 Billion soldiers. They may have lost 2 million soldiers in a battle, but they probably had 40 million on the planet, which puts their casualties around what we would consider a very hard war but not unreasonable in terms of percentages. Honestly, the idea that most guardsmen dont live to see retirement is ludicrous and sounds like Tau Propaganda.

@KalashVodka175

Жыл бұрын

@@theduke7539 30b is lowballing it to a ridiculous degree my brother in chri.. emperor. IG numbers in the dozens if not hundreds of trillions and the reason is that tge Imperium’s population is in the quadrillions at the minimum (with terra alone having a population on the low quadrillions according to carrion throne). To put this into persoective, if 1% of the total population is in a planetary army and if 10% of these are recruited into the guard then out of a quadrillion peoples, 10k billions (10 trillions) are in a planetary forces and out of these, 1 trillion is within the Imperial Guard 1 000 000 000 000 000

@nationalsocialism3504

Жыл бұрын

@The Duke yep... the Imperial Guard doesn't tolerate "bad" officers for long. If one keeps fucked up and "wasting" troops then a Commisar will put a bullet in his head for failure. Commisars like Soritas & High Command Guard officers are all drawn from the same Scholams... having recieved the same education and upbringing towards ideological loyalty.

"You see, Tyranids have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them until they reached their limit and shut down. Kif, show them the medal I won."

@RedSiegfried

Жыл бұрын

D-Day comes to mind, unfortunately.

@shinobi-no-bueno

Жыл бұрын

@@RedSiegfried I can see that, this was a(n edited) quote from Zapp Branigan from Futurama lol

@hibbidyjibbidyy

Жыл бұрын

its sexlexia

@worker-wf2em

7 ай бұрын

Imperium ship runs into shower of Eldar Pulsar Lances. “ Nothing remains now but for the Captain to go down with the ship.” “Why, that’s surprisingly noble of you, Sir.” “No. It’s noble of you, Kif. As of now, you’re in command. Congratulations captain”

@3baxcb

5 ай бұрын

​@worker-wf2em I hope he doesn't cut a ribbon at the Doop headquarters with the ship's laser... again.

- 20 million casualties - Flawless Victory

@cardboardbox191

Жыл бұрын

Depending on the scale it might be. I was genuinely wondering how they'd play it.

@bottomlefto

Жыл бұрын

Decisive Imperium Victory

@martinfiedler4317

11 ай бұрын

Death in the service of the Emperor is always a win!

@tbotalpha8133

Ай бұрын

"It's been three days. What's the death toll at now?" "20 million, sir." "Wow. This battle is going really well."

"Sir, we lost 20 million troops the first day!" "That's a damned good start, general. Don't lose heart, I'm sure you'll be able to lose even more tomorrow!" "Thank you, sir. I don't know what I'd do without your encouragement."

@robertcalvin6421

3 ай бұрын

love it lol

How to be a good Imperium commander: 1. Identify the objective. 2. Send in millions of Guardsmen to achieve the objective. 3. Do not achieve the objective. 4. Repeat from step 2 until step 3 no longer applies, then go back to step 1.

@dmgroberts5471

Жыл бұрын

I think step 4 needs to be "order another ten regiments." You wouldn't want to run out of bullet sponges - err, I mean soldiers.

@Neojoe20

9 ай бұрын

😂

Lord Commander Militant-"Well you all please excuse me? I have to make a long distance video call to the Planet Krieg."

@TimoRutanen

Жыл бұрын

Sounds more like a call to president Skroob

@elbolainas4174

Жыл бұрын

40 millions? What will you do with 60 million soldiers? OK, 80 million on the way.

@jorgebarriosmur

Жыл бұрын

@@elbolainas4174 Yeah! You can always trust Krieg to send you simply MORE than you requested!

@nicholasbrown668

Жыл бұрын

​​@@jorgebarriosmur "you need a regiment of Kriegers? Well tbh we have 15 regiments ready to go so we'll just give you those"

@FLMKane

Жыл бұрын

Tried calling Cadia but the robo voice kept saying "planet not found"

I like to think that up this point all movies have just been practice for making the world's greatest Warhammer 40k movie and that's why there are so many perfect scenes like this that just fit.

@aldorea4616

Жыл бұрын

what movie is it from}?

@philosopher24680

Жыл бұрын

@@aldorea4616 Burn After Reading

@skydude7682

Жыл бұрын

I think a warhammer 40k comedy would be amazing

@adamm2091

Жыл бұрын

I want a mega compilation of all of these 40K Mashup loosely strung together to create the perfect parody

@warrenpeace8304

6 ай бұрын

Yeah Amazon is putting out a 40k series starring Henry Cavill and I expect it to be just as bad as every other lame flick they drop. It's gonna be filled with jokes every ten seconds and the good guys are always gonna win. It's gonna be another flopbuster

Lore Accuracy: 110%

"...and we'll interface with the Inquisition on this uh-" "No no, Throne no! We don't want those idiots bumbling around in this! Burn the bodies, and get rid of it."

@roni_foxcoon

Жыл бұрын

So... they got an increase on "Corpse-starch" production?

@ghola82

Жыл бұрын

@@roni_foxcoon well one worlds g3n0cide is another's food rations, ya know? 💀

@Vision1100

4 ай бұрын

And dont forget to keep the bones in. Our ogryns like their starch with the crunchy bits...

Perfect example of "Many of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I'm willing to make."

@woodwyrm

5 ай бұрын

literal example lmao

I'm a man of culture, I see a scene from "Burn After Reading" I smash a like button.

Burn after reading is actually one of my favorite movies bravo for melding these two together

The OST at end was very well placed

@encryp4558

Жыл бұрын

Do you know the name of the ost at the enc

@encryp4558

Жыл бұрын

Nvm it’s children of the omissiah, first song of ad mech game

@AgentK-im8ke

Жыл бұрын

@@encryp4558 it is the Mechanicus game literally just type mechanicus OST and you should find

@GutsDovakjin

8 ай бұрын

​@@encryp4558ty for this 🥹

I love how they're talking about the casualties of a horrible battle in what is otherwise a very quiet room while chatting it up like they simply lost a mildly inconvenient bet. All your hear is the subtle purr of the AC and "Damn that sucks. Yikes... If only we could learn from this. Oh well"

@oldleatherhandsfriends4053

Жыл бұрын

all deaths end up like this unless you know the people. I mean visualize 20 million people standing in front of you? it's just not possible, that is the population of entire states and countries. Maybe a few sectors of a hive city in the 40k universe lol.

@theoreomann794

Жыл бұрын

To give perspective the overall death count of WW2 is 70-85 Million deaths (civilians and military through 7 years of combat) whereas the Imperium only lost 20 Million in one day....

Entering the rift gate alone causes more damage to the Emperor's Forces then virtually anything that is on the other end of that Rift.

Perfectly edited. 👍👍👍

Those numbers are just from the first day, a slow first day.

Admiral: You sent 20 million to their deaths? General: yes sir. Admiral: that’s some of the most rookie numbers I’ve heard for battle, what are we starved for manpower or something, take these 100 million tell me how dumb you feel afterwards and get back to work.

Reminds me of an episode of Animaniacs where Yakko is a tinpot dictator about to send troops off into battle. "Many of you may not come back. Most of you definitely won't."

@BlackEpyon

5 ай бұрын

"Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make."

"The strategy was to empty enemy ammunition, sir" "Good point. Tomorrow send more Guardsmen to the renegade Titan Knights again..!"

I wanted him to be like "well sir, there is one group left but...." - flips page to Krieg Death Korps

@superspies32

7 ай бұрын

"General, there is a ship ready to depart to Khorne infestation planet, Inquisitor just need someone to hold the ground until tech-priests bring the suitable sacrifice for all cyclone torpedo. There is only one seat to leave that planet before the exterminatus but I think its still better than returned and meet that group. And forget about your commissar, he already be executed by Kriegs."

@newyou6210

2 ай бұрын

Lol the irony if 20m guardsmen died and the only ones left standing are the krieg death corp lol. The only thing they want is to die in service of the imperium.

Sly Marbo: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH" (Translation: I could have done it alone)

"what did we learn?" "enemy drown in our blood and gore sir" "promote this man"

Learn? No, nothing to learn. When you lose 20m men in one day that means it's Tuesday.

I like how the commanders didn't learn a goddamn thing and this will definitely happen again in the near future.

"Alright men! Lets show the enemy that we will either die! Or die trying!"

When you let the new guy play with your army that you have been building for over a year to defeat your enemy's

With a motto of, "Trust me, I know what I'm doing!!", this is the only outcome that could be expected with "Inspector Sledge Hammer" (David Rasche) in command of the Imperial Guard!!

@DOSKeymaster151

Жыл бұрын

nah. sledge knew to use appropriate force to respond to threats. sniper on the roof? shoot the base of the building with a bazooka. no more building, no more sniper.

@kevynhansyn2902

Жыл бұрын

I always loved that show!

Never before has J.K.Simmons reminded me more of his Red Alert 3 role than in this clip :D

That OST, though! Brilliant, bloody brilliant!

This video is pure gold

Who came before the C'tan, were the 2nd and 11th primarchs Muscle Mommies, is there a better use of 500 trillion men than to send them into a meat grinder? Somethings we may never know Don't forget, that if you want to support my content and enter month box giveaways head over to patreon.com/WoodImp

@Paddythefox

Жыл бұрын

We may never know

@cravinghibiscus7901

Жыл бұрын

I think we all in our hearts know two of these to be true.

@pffthulu6545

Жыл бұрын

Waxing existential on me.

Dude that scene came from one of my favorite movie of all time and now this mad KZreadr made a short with my favorite franchise? This is a match made in heaven!

"They told me I couldn't beat the Charge of the Light Brigade. And I said, _Hah! Watch me...!"_

Said Chaos Knight turned into a demon prince that day.

@Veliuszero1

Жыл бұрын

Lol yeah quite possibly

@hocktu

Жыл бұрын

That might be true but now there is one less chaos knight.

"Palmer, why do you have Kreig regiment on your file? I didn't know you had a Kreig regiment." "I don't sir." "So why are they here?" "They volunteered." "And send themselves to their deaths?" "Yes, sir. I asked the whereabouts of their Commissar. The Kreig captain told he died after he ordered the Kreig to retreat and was killed by unknown reason." "They killed him, didn't they." "I assumed so. So I was the closest Commissar/battle to their location, and they charged at the enemy without my orders or the approval of Adeptus Administratum." "What a cluster fuck, Palmer." "Yes sir."

This is fucking perfect.

For those who are curious, I believe this was a scene from the movie "Burn After Reading"

i swear this is one of the most funny meme clip so fare ! good job !

Ork Warboss after losing 20 million boyz: DAT WUZ ZOGGIN 'ILARIOUS!

_Commissar Sledge Hammer_ would probably be a great story.

Meanwhile, oNLy 1000 mARinEs pEr CHapTeR! No damn sense, the numbers make no damn sense.

@granknight

Жыл бұрын

Those are not space marines, most likely either cadian guardsman or kriegs.

@Veliuszero1

Жыл бұрын

Well in the lore space Marines have strict limits placed on their troop levels. This is because of how many space Marines turned traitor in the hours heresy. Guardsmen are much simpler to control and if need be,kill than space Marines.

@stonem0013

Жыл бұрын

see it as an unreliable narrator/imperial propaganda

@Warmaker01

Жыл бұрын

1000 Space Marines per chapter would make sense if the Space Marines were truly the elite of the elite. But in canon and in the game, that's not so. Even in the fluff, the "eliteness" of a Space Marine goes wildly up and down from Gods of War to nothing but a fancier clothed Guardsman.

@Veliuszero1

Жыл бұрын

@@Warmaker01 well it's primarily to prevent a second horus heresy. In that time commanders controlled vast armies of space marines. Also the imperial guard(had a different name then) was under the same direct authority as the navy,also contributing to the scale of how bad the civil war was. Basically efforts to break up the command structure and size of certain groups were undertaken. Sorry if I'm just repeating stuff you already know haha.

Two of my favorite things. Lorgar: “it was just lying on the floor there”

20 Million Troopers per day is chickenfeed, as long as you get me those pictures of Spider-Man!

This is one of your best yet lmao

Some of his men might die, but that's the sacrifice he's willing to make

This is the best one so far. I love it :)

"In the 41st Millennium, humanity is not a discrete collection of individuals, but a relentless symphony, surging forth with an indomitable rhythm across the ink-black canvas of space. To exist in the Imperium is to be a single note in this celestial crescendo, a solitary heartbeat within the gainful pulse of the God-Emperor. Each life is not a frail and isolated flicker in an encroaching oblivion, but a radiant ember contributing to a resplendent inferno. Every soldier, every worker, every martyr; their pains and sufferings, their agonising final stands and quiet, unheralded ends are kindling for this blaze that illuminates the devouring darkness of the cosmos. Yes, your death may seem to be an inconsequential vanishing, a soft sigh swallowed up in the roaring orchestra of war that spans light-years. Your blood might sink into the thirsty dust of alien soil, forgotten by time. However, understand this truth: In the ceaseless crucible of battle against the alien horror, the mutant, the heretic, your soul flares bright, searing a precious testament upon the universe’s endless night. The God-Emperor sees, and cherishes. Beneath his eternal gaze, the golden sentinel of humanity, you are not merely blood and bone, but a torchbearer. An irreplaceable thread in the imperishable tapestry of humanity woven across the eons, where no thread is unimportant, no colour insignificant. Your sacrifice is an affirmation, a silent vow uttered to the void that we stand here, hardened by spirit and often, martyrdom but unfailing in your tireless resonance. Dreams of peace may seem unreachable when you march through the meat grinder that endless conflict has reduced existence to. Yet your arduous steps beat the rhythm of a sacrifice song that resonates in the aether. A glorious requiem that soars amidst celestial bodies, its sublime etheric chords strummed by the heroic, the noble, the forgotten. The kaleidoscope of existence comes with suffering, but it too brings unity. For through the storm of war, be it under viridian skies of distant utopias or beneath copper canopies of alien fortresses, the heart of the Imperium thrums steadfast. Within its rhythm echoes a reminder that your life, your death, your joy, your pain - they are the sinews and tendons bridging the flesh and steel bones of the Imperium. In the vaults of the cosmos, beneath the cosmic echoes and amongst the radiant chaos, you are more than an individual facing inexorable oblivion; you are a vital, breathing element of an eternal symphony. One that drowns out the cacophonous machinery of war and stands resolute against the perennial abyss. Thus, in the golden gaze of the God-Emperor, your sacrifice illuminates a trail into the future - a future where the collective might of humanity, steeled by your sacrifice, stands victorious."

Well, the good news is that with 20 million losses it frees up more resources to just do it again. It just shows you, with enough blind -incompetence- determination you can shatter a hammer with enough nails...the number of nails is unimportant.

Best IG unit bark from Dawn of War: "Alright, now let's see you try fighting ALL of us!"

If these where Penal Troops then I am supprised they even opened the folders and dossiers.

One of the best ones yet

20 million? Krieg Officers: Pathethic

Ironically, the horrors that the survivors have witnessed end up making them susceptible to all forms of Heresy, so it's for the best that all jumps the guardsmen go through happen to be one-way.

Love this, more please!

sir! the renegade knights are approaching! "VERY GOOD SOLIDER, FIX BAYONETS"

Humans are the cheapest commodity in 40k. In a war of attrition, this is a win for the Imperium.

Adeptus Mechanicus Soundtrack from the PC Game at the end is soo awesome !!

Probably the best of these I've seen.

Only 20 million, I'd call that good day.

@dmgroberts5471

Жыл бұрын

It must have been a small battle.

@legionaryrushd6932

8 ай бұрын

A skirmish,of course.

I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference

Commisor Sledge Hammer before sending his troops to their certain death: "Trust me, I know what i'm doing"

20 million a day? Those are rookie numbers you gotta pump those numbers up. - some Krieg commander

This might be your best one yet! Fuckin brilliant 😂

Freaking brilliant editing. Good job!

this is a good fucking choice, holy shit

Btw the editing is amazing bro, I'm speechless 😳💪

You are killing it with these

Rookie numbers

@BLOODKINGbro

Жыл бұрын

Acceptable losses to obtain victory

Burn before reading was such a funny movie. Fits perfectly with this, nice one!

That was golden. After he show the reason all these men are dead I cracked

Commissars: i don't care, i lost count. Just send them in.... Honors is what i care! For the Emperor!!! The enemies: Orcs, Tyranids, traitor manires, Khornate daemons

Orbital strike for another 20-30 years it is.

"At a predetermined number of casualties, the Imperium 'rage quits'. This act may seem like a victory but actually is just a nice way of saying that they enact Exterminatus."

We need a re-enactment of that battle. On the tabletop. With actual 20 million infantry guardsmen. Who wants to start painting?

Honestly, I hope I'm anywhere near this good at video editing someday. Well done!

"When the only outcome is annihilation, then any other possible outcome is preferable."

There's usually a gap of one regiment, sometimes more (much more), meaning, those regiments were already decimated, and the survivors re-absorbed into other regiments. Surviving one day at a time. And then you run into Titans.

beautiful as per, just a slight snag

The best clip ever made!

The only thing that would make this scene even better for 40K is if the camera at the end tilted upwards to reveal stacks of similar folders by his desk.

"Sir, we lost 20 million men today!" "Did we complete the mission?" "Yes sir!" "Glory to the Emperor! Drinks all round!"

Superb. Works so well

head cannon for me has always been "20 million.... why are you bringing this to me, i got better things to think about... now where did my kitty go"?

Bruh. Those casualty reports were unexpected and had me rolling! Then the second one! ROFL.

are u kidding me ? this is just a Tuesday for imperium

As the second paper came up I laughed so hard it hurt.

I was honestly expecting a different scene from the same movie. _"...okay, no biggie."_

A company wondering why they're employees left and still kept on hiring more

“Jesus f-cking Christ” “Oh, hold on… YOU’RE A HERETIC!” **BLAM**

Probably both the Commander and Palmer wouldn't want to know more next time.